March 12th, 2014

MPs Stuff Their Faces With Free Pudding on the Taxpayer

Parliament’s taxpayer-subsidised bars, cafes and restaurants have introduced a pudding loyalty scheme for MPs, journalists and staff. Once you buy a pudding from all four of the eateries taking part, you get one free. Caught almost literally with their snouts in the trough…


242 Comments

  1. 1
    Eric Pickles says:

    Put me down for ten, please.

    Like

  2. 2
    Rabid dribbler says:

    Spotted dick all round!!!

    Like

  3. 3
    Norfolk's Finest says:

    Honestly, I couldn’t care less.

    Like

    • 41

      And you are one of the many who are the fucking problem in this country. About time fucking tards like you either started caring about the scum in suits MPs who basically wank in our faces daily whilst telling us what to do OR we should rise up, kill the tards like you and the chavs and the dharbs then move onto the scumfucks in suits and their protectors the pigs and the roided up twats in camouflage then move on to the German inbred kiddie fuckers in the palace.

      Like

  4. 5
    Anonymous says:

    It’ll be a cold day in hell when we see Mr Wickham in 7 Millbank for his qualifying pudding.

    Like

  5. 7
    Jacqueline Dromey says:

    Any PIEs ?

    Like

  6. 8
    Jack and Harriet says:

    We love PIEs

    Like

  7. 9
    was it something I said? says:

    Bob Crow’s death has obviously been an inspiration to the catering department.

    Like

    • 16
      Podiceps says:

      Crow pie on the menu?

      Like

      • 39
        was it something I said? says:

        No. By trying to encourage a few more heart attacks amongst the useless fuckers.

        Like

        • 102
          Blowing Whistles 1 says:

          On the plus side its so good also to see them all already eating themselves up – trying to still keep that ‘The EU’ is good for you B/S going – aided and abetted by their bum chms in the dead tree press / msm.

          i’m loving every minute of it.

          Like

  8. 10
    Ed Balls - Shallow Chancer says:

    IS 44 BIGGER THAN 39 ??

    Like

  9. 12
    Malaysian Search Party says:

    Religion to the rescue

    Like

    • 52
      lockheed martin research and development department says:

      goddammit watermelons might just sort out that balance problem on our new drone.

      Like

      • 105
        Blowing Whistles 1 says:

        HAT TIP – to Sam Kiley on B/SkyB (pun inc) tonight at just after six – talking all about decompression possibilities / if on auto pilot [he didn't mention of if not on auto pilot which would have facilitated instant intoxification] … Oh hold on a minute … weren’t a few of us discussing that issue on here last night …

        FU – Sam.

        Like

        • 187
          Treacle Tart says:

          Sky had some pilot bloke on a simulator explaining all that as a possible scenario, so maybe, just, maybe, Sam was actually watching what his own channel were putting out rather than wasting his time on here like we do.

          Like

  10. 13
    Podiceps says:

    It isn’t free. We pay for it.

    Like

  11. 14
    Mr Creosote says:

    Room for one more!

    Like

  12. 18
    Blue Peter Goldfish says:

    Just look what you are missing Gordon, the pudding offer won’t be valid for the next 5 years, anybody Spotted Dick?.

    Like

  13. 19
    Diane Fatbutt says:

    I’m in the pudding club.

    Like

  14. 20
    LOLMPZ says:

    Is it can be fwee puddingz plz?
    OMG nom nom nom nom nom

    Like

  15. 21
    M103 says:

    Why does everyone (Obama, Harper, Cameron) kowtow to the Knesset ? I understand supporting statements against anti-semitism but not necessarily all the decisions of an Isr@eli government!!

    Like

    • 26
      The Elders of Zion says:

      We control their hamsters. We use the hamster brain to beam thoughts into their brains!

      Like

      • 36
        Anonymous says:

        quite amazing that even though the pr0tocols are apparently fake they do in many ways resemble what has happened politically to the world in the last oh at least one hundred years. fancy that what a coincidence who’d of thunked it etc fucking etc.

        Like

        • 123
          Oswald Mosely Jnr. says:

          Come on! If you wanted a job in merchant banking would you really want to alienate blokes like Nat Rothschild, Bob Diamond or at Goldman’s a man called Blankfein?
          Thirty years ago the movers and shakers in IT were called Jobs, Ellison and Gates, now Google and Facebook are run by the Chosen only. Try getting an anti-semi book published by a mainstream publisher; who calls the shots at the BBC? Cohen, Yentob & family. Is Mr Grade a catholic? Who owns all the ad agencies? Sorell, Saachi are not Quakers. Could Strauss-Kahn have got away with his hobby if he was a Methodist like Rev. Flowers?
          Get with the programme and render unto Yahweh that which is Yahweh’s and you may be allowed a bit of a job–anyway, they are better than arabs.

          Like

      • 75
        Anonymous says:

        you have read them yeah?! what do you think when the big global sized cull happens that the technology will swerve past you and your family just because you posted in their favour on the guido fucking fawkes blog?! you stupid stupid cu.nt. they do not give a single fuck about you- if anything they hold you more in contempt than those who do realize what they are trying to do.

        at best we have got 6 weeks, at worst just over 2 weeks.

        Like

        • 87
          Concerned Person says:

          Please talk to somebody you trust, who might be able to help you.

          Like

        • 89
          was it something I said? says:

          Can I buy all your stuff right now for oooh, say, 10p in the pound. That way you can use the money to have a great time for two to six weeks. And the best bit is you can get it back for 0p in the pound in 2 – 6 weeks time.

          You being in the loop and all.

          Like

        • 108
          Blowing Whistles 1 says:

          There’s a bit more to the elders’ stuff – a tape recording made in New York in about the late seventies – all about them crowing [pun not intendead] as being in total control of the media. But what would i know eh?

          Like

    • 51
      Heil Cameron says:

      Those “Conservative Friends Of Israel” have been busy bunnies haven’t they?

      Doesn’t take a genius to work out that Cameronanist doesn’t want to upset his future employers on the lecture circuit and beyond…

      Like

      • 110
        Blowing Whistles 1 says:

        And of course ‘they’ don’t hold the purse strings of the marxists and the Capitalists – thereby controlling both sides of the presumed division … neat trick that would be though eh?

        Like

    • 195
      SockpuppetsRus says:

      Why do I get the feeling one bloke with an agenda has posted everything above?

      Like

  16. 22
    Screwed Taxpayer says:

    630 fucking toughing thieving bastards.

    Put some strychnine in the pudding.

    Like

  17. 24
    Blue Peter Goldfish says:

    Lemon Meringue Pie
    Bakewell Tart
    Plum Duff
    Jam Rolly Polly

    Like

  18. 27
    RomaBob.... working hard for you! says:

    I suspect some Labour MPs like a good manly chocolate pudding :)

    Like

  19. 29
    Diane Abbott says:

    Like Fatty Watson I am drooling out of the mouth. But why is is Brown & sticky?

    Like

  20. 30
    Guy News Room says:

    Owen Jones makes no sense with his half baked tweets, says David Cameron

    Like

  21. 31
    Anonymous says:

    Cry baby Jones turns a blind eye.

    Like

    • 50
      Fishy says:

      Eh?

      Like

      • 58
        Someone says:

        He’s doing what is called, ‘avoiding the question’. It suggests he knows full well what a hypocritical hoon he is.

        Like

      • 59
        Bill Quango MP says:

        I think he means Tesco checkout workers should pay the Guardian’s tax bill

        Like

        • 90
          was it something I said? says:

          It’s the right thing to do.

          Like

          • Dangerous Brian says:

            I think Owen should be judged using the new “d*ckheadometer”, recently introduced to find out how many of those in the public eye are grasping simpletons with blinkered views and limited imaginations.
            Unfortunately it is in for repair as Chukusyamuni got tested yesterday, like an overheating thermometer it went off the known scale and exploded.
            A similar outcome is expected once Owen gets a go.

            Like

    • 78
      Fishy says:

      Judge him by his tax affairs? OK then.

      Let’s hear from Jones about his income. He claims that he only got around £20k from the (not really) Independent; he says that the royalties from his book are negligible (which is probably true); he might have an advance for his next bit of scribble to be published later this year. So how TF does he manage to live in expensive London?

      Perhaps it’s all those BBC appearances that are keeping the hard left Jones afloat?

      Does Jones PAYE these or has he set himself up as a company to pay himself a wage a la Ken Livingstone?…and a dividend at a lower rate of tax.

      Like

  22. 32
    Middle Class crushed by taxation says:

    If we shop at Lidl, Aldi, Farmfoods and the Poundshop can we get a trip to Waitrose?

    Like

  23. 33
    You are what you eat. says:

    Greasy will be bringing in the volunteers to get their fill too!

    Why bother giving MPs wages when they get everything for free while troughing off the vulnerable! Unacceptable.

    Like

  24. 35
    Vlad the Loudhailer says:

    How can they, don’t they realise there’s a cost of pudding crisis.

    Like

    • 188
      Treacle Tart says:

      As Lonnie once sang:

      Pudding on the agony
      pudding on the style
      that’s what crooked MPs
      are doing all the while.
      Stuff their face a little
      then stuff more for a while
      but we know these crooks are bent
      all the F****g while.

      Like

  25. 38
    Greedy Guts MP! says:

    I eat one meal a day & small supper. These pigs feast of the fat of land at the expense of others.

    Like

  26. 40
    John g0pvr says:

    Nice to see em tucking into some free scran, they’ll be joining us in the ques at the local foodbank then? Let them eat cake ( the bastards!)

    Like

  27. 42
    Bogof says:

    Leeches& parasites!

    Like

  28. 43

    I trust Guido will be boycotting this.

    Like

    • 46
      Marxism is really about child abuse says:

      But Hattie will be boycottaging it.

      Like

      • 112
        Blowing Whistles 1 says:

        Marxism was also ‘constructed’ to keep the masses down and in their place while its real controllers laughed in the faces of everyone below at being so easily misled as sheep are.

        Like

  29. 47
    Alex Salmond, formerly the cleverest man in politics says:

    I was going for this until I found they didn’t classify deep-fried Mars Bars as pudding. #bullying

    Like

  30. 49
    SAM says:

    If it was a missile, the Chinese will definitely get the blame. After all, all the parts will say ‘made in China’ whoever’s SAM it was.

    Like

  31. 53
    Ed The Eunuch says:

    http://m.bbc.com/news/uk-politics-26548662

    “But Mr Milimong accused the Tories of
    having an “obsession” with Europe”???.

    Because it is what the voters want you Mandelson arselicker & shit for brains.

    I am convinced Labour have lost the next election. Bye Bye B.liar & Bye Bye Mandy, thinking you can screw the electorate for your own self interests!

    Like

  32. 54
    Benny Fitz-Clements says:

    Like

  33. 56
    Dai Laffing says:

    The whole UK political system is a joke all the parties are just playing games with the general public, they were bought off years ago, thats why Mad UKIP want in on a piece of the corrupt action.

    Like

  34. 57
    Spotted Dick says:

    Miliblunder is a pudding which promises to give voters satisfaction but tastes of shit.

    Like

  35. 62
    Put it in says:

    Silly people in a little island. I call GUK …….gay UK.

    Like

  36. 63
    Democracy Watch says:

    This is not a democracy

    Like

  37. 64
    ████ 'changed my tune ' Hoon says:

    Like

  38. 65
    ʍȫʊʂʂȁ ҞϴџṦṦậ says:

    Last night a law was passed granting David Cameron the power to close your local hospital without proper consultation with local people and NHS staff.

    The Tory-led government was beaten in the courts twice. Now ministers have simply changed the law to get their own way.

    Share this on Facebook to help us get the word out about what the Tories are doing to our NHS:

    Like

    • 69
      Podiceps says:

      ‘Tory-led government’? The leading principle is whatever the semi-socialist Cameron is allowed to do by the sort-of-socialist but mainly spoilt-child Clegg. A nasty mix, I grant you, but anyone who sees a right-wing agenda in it is deluded.

      Like

    • 83
      aurora borealis says:

      Never mind what the coalition is doing to the NHS to try and get it back up to standard lets have an in depth look at what the deathly burnham did to the NHS during his tenure as National death secretary of state during the last labour government

      Like

    • 91
      was it something I said? says:

      Why the fuck would you ‘consult with NHS staff’?

      Dear NHS staff. We’re going to shut down your death camp and throw you all on the dole. Do you agree?

      What do you think they’re going to say?

      Why waste time asking them?

      If they don’t like it how about they go back in time and stop fucking well killing people or covering up for their incompetent colleagues who’ve been killing people. And, while they’re in tat time machine go back and smother that c*unt Tony Blair in his crib.

      Like

    • 146
      Táxpáyér says:

      Go private. If enough people want a hospital nearby, it stays open.

      It’s the only,sustainable way.

      Like

    • 197
      taxdodger says:

      The Labour-led PFI initiative is the cancer which is sucking the life out of the NHS.

      Like

  39. 66
    Mandy. says:

    You will never get a referendum while I wish to continue to pursue my self interests in Europe. You pèasants will just have to accept it.

    Now Miliband you missed a part in the crack of my arse. Licky licky.

    Vote Labour and keep my bank account bulging.

    Like

  40. 71
    Watch Euroshite every Saturday night on the BBC! Kerchiiiiing. Soon you will be fluent in seven different languages! says:

    If Dave does not give us a referendum, there will be anarchy in the streets. Voters are running out of patience with this EU bollocks!

    Like

  41. 72
    Put it in says:

    Female Italian MP ‘bought sex toys on expenses’
    Politician accused of buying sex toys with taxpayers’ money as expenses scandal hits Italy’s South Tyrol

    ………………

    Is another country which needs strong men to assist the women.

    Like

  42. 73
    Edtastic says:

    Like

    • 82
      aurora borealis says:

      I think the problem is even militwit doesn’t know what militwit is doing or why he’s doing it.

      Headless chickens come to mind!

      Like

      • 92
        was it something I said? says:

        UKIP has Labour shitting broken glass.

        Like

        • 106
          aurora borealis says:

          Well I wish nigelfarage well and have high hopes he’s going to have a seat in parliament come 2015.

          But I don’t think ukip is labour’s biggest problem – the indecisive, wishy washy, not sure what I believe in militwit is labour’s biggest problem.

          Like

  43. 76
    Union Strategy says:

    Time for the Unions to grow a pair. Get rid of the leech that is Labour. Why let them dictate Union reforms. Learn to stand on your own two feet. At the moment you are just union of shit bags paying Labour to walk all over you. Grow up!

    Like

    • 79
      Owen Jones says:

      Stop handing out benefits then. Not rocket science .

      Like

    • 111
      aurora borealis says:

      The unions are a dying product of a bygone age. They’re akin to gas lighting and the horse drawn hackney cab of pre WW1. If they’re going to survive at all they need a new and more modern strategy.

      Like

  44. 80
    EU Watch 2 says:

    Merkel is getting ‘Tusky’ with Russia:

    But what does she mean by this ?

    ‘Berlin had no intention of taking military action against Moscow. However, it, like the rest of the EU would not simply “avoid conflict.”‘

    G’ermany leading a campaign into U’kraine has precedence for failure, and it is not for M’erkel or Tusk to be setting EU Foreign Policy.

    Like

    • 182
      Spartacus says:

      today europe, tomorrow the world

      Like

    • 189
      Treacle Tart says:

      …. which just goes to show exactly how much they regard that ex-CND retard Wheelbarrowness Ashtray.

      Like

    • 214
      SIZE 14 CARBON FOOTPRINT says:

      Can anyone seriously envisage the Bundeswehr invading the Crimea , after filling in risk assessment forms , and ensuring the ethnic minorities are fully represented at all levels of command, and all equipment is in a safe and serviceable condition and complies with european safety directive paragraph 15 sub para 7a ( armed operation) clause 9c.

      Like

  45. 81
    aurora borealis says:

    Puddings! But! But!…..I thought MP’s were advocating that we should be eating healthy salads fruit and veg!!

    So what is this one rule for them and another for us??!

    Like

    • 190
      Treacle Tart says:

      Jack and Hari pudding and pie
      kissed the kids and made them cry
      but when the news found light of day
      Jack and H they ran away.

      Like

  46. 84
    C O (Ξ6) says:

    Just a little north of K’harkiv:

    photo/1

    A lot of R-Fed iron on the move:

    h**p://www.interpretermag.com/ukraine-liveblog-day-23-ukraines-interim-prime-minister-meets-obama/#1903

    This kind of build up really only means one thing.

    Like

    • 96
      was it something I said? says:

      Yes. They’re going to seal the border. Then Ukraine can come and have a go if it thinks it’s hard enough.

      Don’t care.

      None of our business.

      Like

      • 109
        aurora borealis says:

        according to some the crimea ,like georgia is going to become a criminal ungovernable black hole – putin may well have taken over yet another troublesome problem he wishes he didn’t have.

        Whatever, it doesnt look like the crimea is going to bring him any benefits for all that loss of credibility and respectability he thought he’d won in the wider world.

        Like

    • 100
      Trouble 't Mill says:

      On the clip below, one can see Russian tanks and trucks being moved in to an area about 20 kilometers from the border with Ukraine near a place called Kharkiv.
       

      Like

    • 115
      Blowing Whistles 1 says:

      i am sure there are plenty of generals in the UK and other European countires who are fucking sick of merkel cameorn and other the EU nutjobs – who will come to the rescue of the peoples of Europe who have had their government ‘hijacked’ by unelected wankers placemen and women and deluded fools.

      Like

      • 210
        SIZE 14 CARBON FOOTPRINT says:

        The Generals were long ago replace by PC warriors ,look at the UK lot who allowed the armed services to be infested with gaysters and wimmin .

        Like

    • 116
      Blowing Whistles 1 says:

      btw – get your ass up to box 12 and have a read of comment 104. Good Night.

      Like

      • 134
        C O (Ξ6) says:

        The only problem with the hypothesis is that for hypoxia there would need to be a failure of the oxygen supply system if there was a de-pressurisation.

        In that event the AWACS system would likely have transmitted, and it does not explain how the transponder was deactivated which would have continued to report position whilst the plane was in flight.

        It cannot be ruled out – but there are a number of differences between a private Jet and commercial which makes it much less probable on this commercial Jet.

        NB: The other mystery is with the black box.

        These contain ultrasonic pingers which can be detected several hundred miles away if underwater. The reports I have seen in MSM have not mentioned this, and also such pings have not been found. These will one of the things being looked for.

        Like

        • 140
          C O (Ξ6) says:

          Oops: Ultrasonic ping can be detected several miles away – not several hundred miles. Typically about 14,000 feet.

          Like

          • Blowing Whistles 1 says:

            i am reminded of the still unresolved ‘oddities’ surrounding a ‘big’ plane crashing into the penta.gone. The concealed cctv footage from all around and other oddities.

            Like

          • was it something I said? says:

            Good recovery there. I was going to point out the Air France flight that took almost a week to locate when it disappeared over the Atlantic.

            You can’t be too careful. We had a fucking imbecile on here yesterday telling us that fluoride was a heavy metal.

            Like

          • C O (Ξ6) says:

            Yes – saw that yesterday – weird.

            The AF447 crash took a while to find but not surprising. Odd note is that after that crash there was a revision to regulations on black boxes which mandated that the locator beacons should be functional for 90 days, extended from the 30 days at that time.

            There was also a recommendation for a secondary ultrasound beacon to be fitted in planes which would be flying commonly over sea, transmitting at a lower frequency to extend the detection range and help with location. Not sure if this plane was fitted with that.

            @BW1: There were plenty of oddities on that day including the BBC announcing the collapse of WTC7 before it was demolished.

            Like

          • Blowing Whistles 1 says:

            To the nobend blogger ‘was it …’ – go back and check the original flouride post – i fucking know that you are attempting to make out that it was someone else who started that issue – nice try ARSEHOLE.

            Like

          • was it something I said? says:

            Doesn’t matter who started the issue. There was a jackass hereabouts last night who reckoned flouride was a heavy metal. A heavy-fucking-metal. Ahahahahaha.

            Can you imagine?

            I had to learn the first twenty elements by heart for ‘O’ Level. Hydrogen, Helium…etc

            Can you imagine being so fucking stupid and so chemically illiterate, no, no, not just chemically illiterate but so lacking in general-fucking-knowledge that they didn’t know that Flourine was a gas?

            Yet that’s what some jackass was parroting from some blog he was c+p ing.

            Seriously.

            You should have been here.

            It was fucking hilarious.

            Like

    • 118
      Blowing Whistles 1 says:

      afore i go i thought of a little goggleing

      http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/1999_South_Dakota_Learjet_crash

      Like

      • 165
        Blowing Whistles 1 says:

        And of reports of debris in the south China sea at time of this posting – i refer to the payne stewart thingy – wherein the answer may lay in ‘The Aftermath':

        where a jury in 2005 [were they a properly informed jury?] found that the Company L.Jet were NOT liable for the deaths.

        Of course corporate lawyers and big bucks corporate compo have ntohing to do with the truth getting in the way of the percieved justice being alomst seen to be done – as i am known to state now and then.

        Like

  47. 86
    Owen Jones says:

    I hate this idea of closing the odd hospital. Close the fucking lot and start again. Bollocks to the left.

    Like

  48. 101
    Double Dim Jim on the BBC. It's all for charity says:

    Even when the BBC get it wrong, we are always right. Deal with that illusion. Pèasants! Do not forget to pay your licence fees,our lefty fucktard charity does not run by itself you know. Now jog on scum! Just do it. We don’t care if you are crippled- financially or intellectually. We are mega rich leeching off you, the thicko brainwashed scum.

    Like

    • 103
      Owen Jones,champagne quaffing and cigar smoking socialist says:

      I’ll get me coat. ©

      When I have dusted it off. Don’t think it will be anytime soon though. :0(

      Like

    • 104
      aurora borealis says:

      according to the news yesterday ‘ even the bbc knows the license fee must come to an end’

      I can’t wait for the day when the beeb has to become a commercial organisation and seriously look at giving it’s customers what they want – like professional, properly balanced news!

      Like

      • 185
        cuntbot666 says:

        the only person who wasn’t a Hunt on bbc news was dan the weatherman aka daniel corbett but he fucked off. but fear not! some kind soul has uploaded dan’s unforgettable and frankly masterful presentation of the weather on news years day 2009… in high definition no less.

        Like

  49. 114
    Anonymous says:

    Looks like more £ BBC cash, press-ganged from the minimum waged will be funneled into Owen Jones Champagne Socialist acne Ltd.

    Like

    • 119
      Blue Peter Goldfish says:

      Bob Crow week on the BBC.

      Like

    • 130
      a laber voater says:

      i carnt join a unoin cos i is on beniz innit. is their a uimon four the unimploded?

      Like

    • 141
      Idon'tneednodoctor says:

      Owen Jones is a waste of a human being.

      Like

    • 143
      Jack Ketch says:

      The late Mr Crow hated the Labour Party (bunch of university poofs), he hated the EU (bunch of foreign poofs), he hated the BBC (bunch of poofs), he hated the Tories (bunch of toffie-nosed poofs). He was in favour of bringing back the death penalty for PDO files (filthy poofs) and he would have ground Owen Jones to a small pile of dog-pooh like matter under his steel-toecapped boot.
      What’s not to like? RIP a real man.

      Like

  50. 117
    Blue Peter Goldfish says:

    When you have finished gorging yourselves on free puddings is there any chance of a referendum? (twats).

    Like

  51. 120
    Mr Kipling says:

    That’s having your cake and eating it given the food is already subsidised by us.

    Like

  52. 124
    Diane Abbott says:

    All for me!! More more more!

    Like

  53. 128
  54. 129
    .??? says:

    A Chinese satellite searching for missing Malaysian Airlines flight 370 has found what it is calling a ‘suspected crash area at sea’ – releasing images of what they are describing as ‘large, floating, objects’ in the South China Sea.
    The potentially crucial development comes on the fifth day of the search for the Boeing 777 – which seemingly vanished without trace early on Saturday morning.
    China’s State Administration for Science, Technology and Industry for National Defense announced the discovery of what they said were ‘three suspected floating objects and their sizes’ along with another image of what appears to show an oil slick tracing the surrounding area.

    Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2579524/Chinese-satellite-finds-suspected-crash-site-Malaysian-Airlines-flight-370-South-China-Sea-did-three-days-release-them.html#ixzz2vmpOMY5w
    Follow us: @MailOnline on Twitter | DailyMail on Facebook

    Like

  55. 133
    Satellite says:

    A Chinese satellite searching for missing Malaysian Airlines flight 370 has found what it is calling a ‘suspected crash area at sea’ – releasing images of what they are describing as ‘large, floating, objects’ in the South China Sea.

    Daily Mail website

    Like

    • 138
      Podiceps says:

      What a literate satellite. Trust those clever Chinese.

      Like

      • 162
        Beep bop brrrr click says:

        You have obviously never heard of computer language

        Like

        • 174
          Podiceps says:

          Been coding since 1985 and it’s never said a word to me.

          Like

          • was it something I said? says:

            I used to get ‘divide by zero’ messages all the time.

            Like

          • Treacle Tart says:

            I forget now how to do it, but when I was at school by using basic a + b algebra it was possible to show in a few lines that 2 = 1 (by dividing by zero of course, but that does not show up when you are using letters instead of numbers).

            It started with a = b; therefore a2 [squared] = ab; minus b therefore a2-b = ab-b; then factorise: … and that is where I forget the next move.

            Old age creeping up on me. Perhaps somebody with more ability can provide the next couple of lines to show the proof.

            Like

          • Axe The Telly Tax & Religion & Kill All Eco-loons says:

            You subtract b squared from both sides giving

            a2-b2 = ab-b2
            (a+b)(a-b) = b(a-b) factorising
            a+b = b divide both sides by a-b

            In effect though you are dividing both sides by zero, so the result is gibberish :-)

            Like

          • Axe The Telly Tax & Religion & Kill All Eco-loons says:

            I should have added that as a=b then we end up with 2b=b, then divide both sides by b and you end up with 2=1

            Like

          • Treacle Tart says:

            Thank you kind sir. I knew it was something like that.

            May be gibberish but it makes a good party piece for those who are unfamiliar with first year algebra!

            Like

  56. 137
    William Pitt the Younger says:

    I think I could eat one of Bellamy’s veal pies. [Dies.]

    Like

  57. 139
    Ed Miliband says:

    Fudge cake for me with extra fudge sauce.

    Like

  58. 147
    C O (Ξ6) says:

    Owner of UK bookstore chain Waterstones replaces head editor of ‘independent’ R’ussian news agency with K’remlin agitprop:

    Perhaps Waterstones should be on the avoid list as it is funding R’ussian propaganda.

    Like

  59. 152
    Anonymous says:

    Like

  60. 153
    This will all end in tears says:

    Like

  61. 161
    Anonymous says:

    Odd the BBC does not mention any of Blairs texts to Becky including xxxxx’s

    They were all over Cameron just for borrowing a fucking horse

    Like

  62. 163
    EU Watch 2 says:

    Sex with animals is a major problem in the Eurozone.

    Particularly in Denmark.

    #bandogbrothels

    Like

  63. 164
    Ah! Sol Campbell Abbott says:

    I should have been Primate.

    Like

  64. 172
    134 years later and they have to go robbing for their ciggies says:

    Like

  65. 173
    Calamity Clegg, Chief Cockroach says:

    HHEELLLLLLPPPPPPPP !!!

    Like

    • 175
      YouGov The short sighted Pollster says:

      YouGov? FFS when their president drew the short straw in a straw poll and won baroness Ashton as a wife.

      Like

    • 179
      was it something I said? says:

      That’s a fucking scandal. In 2010 The Tories beat Labour by 7% and were 30 or so seats short of a majority. In 2015 Labour are 2% ahead and that gives a 24 seat majority.

      That’s just not right.

      I mean obviously, if your Labour, it’s as funny as fuck and a thumping electoral ‘mandate’ but really WTF.

      Like

      • 193
        Remedial spelling class says:

        … if you’re ….

        Like

      • 211
        Democracy Now says:

        Of course it’s a scandal. Like the way there are constituencies, like the Isle of Wight where well over a hundred thousand people are repreesented by one MP but in Scotland there is a constituency where a fifth of that number of people get to be represented in Westminster. This the extreme end of the contrast, but there are loads of seats in the south of England where the public are ‘under-represented’ and places in Wales, the North of England and Scotland where much smaller elecrorates are given the privilege of voting Labour. The system has been grossly gerrymandered. The idea of an equal franchise with one man one vote has been thrown out the window because of cyncial and corrupt ‘party political’ calculations. This is not a democracy.

        Like

        • 216
          SIZE 14 CARBON FOOTPRINT says:

          Fear not, just hope that they get the YES vote in Scotland,that will rid us of about 46 labour, and a few lib dem MPs, not to mention the SNP grievance mongers who infest Westminster .

          Like

          • Democracy Now says:

            But that won’t solve the problem of constituency boundaries which are unfair. Why should some places with 45000 voters have an MP and others with nearly double that number also only have one MP?

            Why are the boundaries fixed to suit the parties and not re-organised to ensure an equal franchise so that a vote in, say, London, is worth the same as a vote in a Welsh valley?

            Like

          • Treacle Tart says:

            Better ask Cleggy why, when it came to implementing the proposed changes, he threw his toys out of the pram for the answer to that. Coalition ‘agreement’. Liebdums do not know the meaning of what that means. With a tiny bit of luck after having shown just how unreliable and devious they are, they will all be wiped off the electoral map next year.

            Like

  66. 199
    Guy News Room says:

    Owen Jones is a sad shambles. Neither one thing nor the other. Labour voters deserve better from him,the little bitch.

    Like

  67. 209
    Relieved Taxpayer says:

    Well thank goodness for that. I was beginning to think my taxes were being wasted. Now I don’t feel so bad the kids haven’t had a holiday for years.

    Like

  68. 213
    Anonymous says:

    So the Tories have just woken up to the fact Dimblebore goes easy of lefty politicians on QT. How many fucking years?

    Like

  69. 215
    Salamat says:

    We have heard so much guff over the years about ‘emerging markets’ that we often forget that if you scratch the surface of the carefully burnished PR images of an educated and thrusting modernity, countries like Malaysia can be really very primitive.

    Like

  70. 217
    Bus Pass Elvis says:

    CALL CALAMITY CLEGG – THE CONGENITAL, PROFESSIONAL LIAR.

    Like

  71. 219
    Owen Jones says:

    Evans put his hand down my trousers, but came out empty-handed.

    Like

  72. 220
    Asslick Almond says:

    Like

    • 226
      Small Business says:

      Who do they mean by ‘business’?

      The same twats from large corporations who we always hear from and about or the overtaxed small British businesses who are fed up with the way they have been frozen out of bidding for public work by red tape and EU regulations, and fed up with having to compete against the big corporations who have been busing in cheap agency contactors from the EU – and which pay next to no tax.

      Like

    • 234
      SIZE 14 CARBON FOOTPRINT says:

      What is more revealing is the inside feature THE EUROPE DEBATE what does business want?
      Well fuck business it’s what we want that matters .
      We want is an end to mass immigration , arrest warrants ,criminals kicked out ,stupid rules and regulations , an end to interference in our affairs , our fishing grounds restored to our control, and an end to green taxes and wind farms and 20% vat on everything we buy.
      That is what WE want !

      Like

  73. 222
    Cameron says:

    Today I’m backing Kosher animal slaughter.

    Like

    • 233
      Curious says:

      Did you check whether bumsex marriage is OK according to the Eezrailites?

      Like

      • 236
        Gerry Myers says:

        The opinion polls that were used to support the trashing of real marriage need to be taken with a lot of salt.

        Like

    • 240
      Treacle Tart says:

      Did you see Iain Dale on the Sky early papers today saying he was totally against the Islamic/J**ish methods of inhumane slaughter of animals? Then the empty bubble headed airbrained dimbo in charge jumped in and asked how that compared to circumcision? Mr Dale was rather flummoxed by that utter non-sequitur; as indeed was his sofa companion 5-bellies Smiff.

      So now the real question is what is the religious affiliation of the aforementioned dimbo bimbo? We need to know for future reference when she is in the chair in future.

      Like

  74. 224
    Shameless says:

    What an affront to the people of the UK that that filthy pervert was still in her job asking questions yesterday.

    Like

  75. 227
    Owen Jones says:

    Comrade Bob Crow is of more importance than Maggie Thatcher and I demand a State funeral. Allah bless him.

    Like

  76. 241
    Anonymous says:

    “MPs Stuff Their Faces With Free Pudding”
    But on the possitive side. If the plebs can’t afford bread, they could always eat each other.

    Like


Seen Elsewhere

Bercow ‘Wounded’ | Speccie
This Goes Further Than Rotherham | Simon Danczuk
Bercow Mocked | Times
Indy Deletes ‘Jewish Lobby’ Headline | MediaGuido
Cracknell v Boris | Sun
British Muslims are Failing to Integrate | Dan Hodges
Dear Sarah Wollaston… | ASI
Treatment of Ashya King’s Family Authoritarian | Brendan O'Neill
Stop the War Should Disband | Rob Marchant
State Should Not Act as Parent | Kathy Gyngell
Guido’s Column | Sun


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Owen Jones says:

We also need Zil lanes.


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