February 26th, 2014

PMQs LIVE: Crackerjack! Edition

Oral Questions to the Prime Minister

Q1 Graeme Morrice (Livingston)

Q2 Sir Alan Beith (Berwick-upon-Tweed)

Q3 Sir Peter Bottomley (Worthing West)

Q4 Lorraine Fullbrook (South Ribble)

Q5 Jack Dromey (Birmingham, Erdington)

Q6 Charlotte Leslie (Bristol North West)

Q7 Julian Smith (Skipton and Ripon)

Q8 Ms Margaret Ritchie (South Down)

Q9 Jim Shannon (Strangford)

Q10 Helen Jones (Warrington North)

Q11 Jessica Lee (Erewash)

Q12 Sir Bob Russell (Colchester)

Q13 Mark Pawsey (Rugby)

Q14 Bob Blackman (Harrow East)

Q15 Luciana Berger (Liverpool, Wavertree)

Comments in the comments please…


  1. 1
    Gobbledygook says:

    Jim Shannon……listen carefully…..

  2. 2
    Chukka says:

    Lucky Luciana


    Will she be showing her knockers to go with those lips?

    • 9
      Ed Balls says says:

      oohhh eeerr hope so

      def would ya know

      oh sorry yvette ……..love ya !

    • 17
      Hadley freeeeeeeman says:

      You’re all sexist-racist.

      Don’t like it? Well we will enrich you out of existence.

      Haha, be awesome like me, cool sunglasses, yeah feminism, freedom for abortion and to let men fuck without responsibility…

      What’s that? The Islamic Republic of Great Britain no longer allows women to be seen in public? But we are all enriched by multiculturalism. It’s intersectionaility? What about 23rd wave feminism? But I was told the cool hip young people wanted it and only white people and men (groups I really hate, there just like not as cool and never have any culture is it?) opposed to it. So confused H4dley! Need new handbag.

      • 96
        jimbo says:

        She is a dopey bint. Check out her latest illiterate diatribe about feminist in-fighting. Well don,t it’s utter tripe but the below the line carnage is funny to see, comment after comment moderated for saying anything even slightly negative about feminism, only allowing those moronic women who sign in to post “we love you hadley” – best bit was the idiotic hadley herself commenting then awarding herself a guardian “pick” for agreeing with a comment that agreed with her article.

        Comment is Free? The bedwetters!

    • 74
      To Chukkka from Luciana says:

      “Applying red lip stick to your foreskin does not do it for me”.

      • 134
        Lucretia Burger says:

        Come here Chucker. I’ll cut it off for you with my trusty secateurs. Then you will be one of us.

      • 137
        broderick crawford says:


        OK then … what if I buy a supply of multi flavoured condoms ?

    • 91
      El Sid says:

      Perhaps Luciana, Ed Balls, Stella Creasy and the other Cooperative MPs will be asking about the record £2bn losses incurred by the Cooperative : http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/business-26350008

      As an aside, why the hell is the Cooperative Bank allowed to keep its name when it should be called the US-hedge-fund Bank?

  3. 2
    Mitch says:

    Big Black Jack at Q5 :-)

  4. 4
    Observer says:

    And Teamster Jack Dromey

    Moral bankruptcy personified

  5. 5
    Ed Miliband says:

    I’m going to promise the British people a referendum on membership of The Labour Party. It will be an in/out/shake it all about question.

  6. 7
    Cazual Observer 7 says:

    Harriet wearing a butterfly brooch…

    • 10
      Mitch says:

      Deaths head moth?

    • 16
      Podiceps says:

      ‘I saw her run after a gilded butterfly: and when she caught it, she let it go again; and after it again; and over and over she comes, and again; catched it again; or whether her fall enraged her, or how ’twas, she did so set her teeth and tear it; O, I warrant it, how she mammocked it!’

      • 36
        Shakin' Stevens says:

        I’d have thought somethign from Twelfth night or one of the other cross-dressing plays would be more appropriate.
        Or perhaps Romeo and Juliet: though Juliet at 14 was a bit elderly.

  7. 8
    Newsflash says:

    They’re talking about floods now.

  8. 11
    Blind Pew says:

    The Eagle brothers looking tasty as ever.

  9. 12
    Baboon's arse says:

    This is fun. I haven’t got a telly so I have no idea what they’re saying.

  10. 13
    Cazual Observer 7 says:

    Ed spreading the man made climate change bollocks. Fuck off Ed you retard lisping fuck.

    • 23
      General Farquhart says:

      What an intelligent comment.

    • 26
      was it something I said? says:

      He believes Labour is a force for good so he should have no problem believing in Man-made-global-climate-change-warming. Or unicorns for that matter.

      • 34
        General Farquhart says:

        Funny that. Because Dave has just said he very much agrees that climate change is man-made.

      • 39
        LibLabCon r all the same says:

        No he is trying to get Dave off the fence and come down in favour of Man Made Climatte change, knowing full well that Dave’s back benchers do not believe in it.

      • 50
        Ralph says:

        Or Daddies fairy tales about the great good of my political works.

      • 120
        Galileo Galilei says:

        I thought I’d got it into people’s heads that observations trump theories, but no! Along comes the CO2 theory and we’re back to Aristotle.

  11. 14
    Weybridgeman says:

    climate change is bunkum….your starter for 10

  12. 19
    Sir Bernard Haagen-Daas says:

    Hattie and two other ugly sisters to Ed’s left. Not as much nodding today.

  13. 20
    So he chickened out says:

    Better off saying Man made climate change is bollocks

  14. 21
    General Farquhart says:

    Dave looks like he is going to have a heart attack at any moment.

  15. 24
    Cazual Observer 7 says:

    We are not building the nuke plant. It is a foreign consortium.

    • 52
      whippet says:

      So were most of the Gas power stations built under labour.
      Strangely contradictory to their climate change stace?

  16. 28
    Dave needs to GO!!! Now says:


    Even if man made climate change existed. If great Britain did not exist then it would make no difference compared to what the rest of the world does.

    • 35
      General Farquhart says:

      So if no-one does anything, does anything get done?

      • 48
        % 6 hhj says:

        Do anything about something that does not exist?

        That is a stupid argument anyway as the science says that Britain’s CO2 emissions are insignificant.

      • 64
        Just how much more do you want? All of it? Cos you ain't getting it... says:

        We have effectively already done it, since our emissions are WAY below average. So we should be sitting back on our laurels, not spending yet more money we don’t have on policies we don’t need.

    • 107

      Don’t let the green arseholes brainwash you into using their new term ‘climate change’ ,stick to their even more ludicrous term of ‘global warming’.

      • 126
        jim says:


        Climate change has existed for as long as the planet has been around. And us humans have been on it for a speck of that time.

        They are changing ‘global warming’ to ‘climate change’, which has always happened irregardless of humans, to cover for their fake science which, inconveniently for them, hasn’t yet materialised.

        Why don’t they go the whole hog and call it ‘the weather’? (Oops, no taxes for that)

        Keep calling it global warming to highlight their scam.

  17. 29
    Yuk says:

    Another vile pig

  18. 30
    Cazual Observer 7 says:

    Osborne fixing the deficit by cutting public investment is what is causing a lot of problems now. That Labour are not attacking that is curious.

  19. 31
    They made me go to rehab says:


  20. 32
    Fuck the LibLabCon says:

    Why are politicians scared to tell the truth about the lack of man made climate change?

    • 94
      Wake up & vote UKIP says:

      To admit that there is no problem means they have no excuse to inflict the ruinous renewable energy taxes.

    • 127
      jim says:

      It’s not climate change, it’s global warming, remember.

      The climate always has, and always will, change.

  21. 37
    Village Idiot says:

    ……Maybe a lot of graduate jobs depend on us being convinced of climate change? It is the weather,which has changed since the year ..
    Air pollution should be tackled vigorously!

  22. 38
    Sixkness says:

    So, that’s a no to Dodds request then…..fuck all will be done to rectify the outrageous decision over the IRA terrorist,

  23. 40
    Perv says:

    Awkward silence for Dromey

  24. 42
    Only Blair says:

    PIE in the face for Dromey.

  25. 45
    Citizen Khan says:

    Piss off you apologist for kiddy fiddlers.

    • 86
      General Farquhart says:

      It’s good to see that the Mail has worked its magic with you.

      • 119
        actually says:

        Also been covered in the Telegraph and Mirror.

      • 130
        jim says:

        This is what gets me, how come it is all some DM smear?

        Did she or did she not sign off on those recomendations printed in the Mail?

        If she did, it is either abhorrent, or catastrophically ignorant, no questions.

        I agree that the DM running stories like ‘shes grown up for her age’ is somewhat sinister, and not appropriate, but that doesn’t detract from what is alleged about HH.

        The comments on here go a little far, in my opinion, but no doubt (If the DM letters are not fakes) she was complicit in something which, was the boot to be on the other political foot, she would be screaming from the rooftops.

        And how come every other time Labour tried to ‘smear’ an opposing politician it was all OK? But not for her or her ilk?

        It all comes down to politicians being unable to show any sort of contrition for wrongdoing, and any sort of backbone for fear of political attack/repraisals.

        They should sod that fear, have an understanding of right and wrong, and prosecute that in every aspect of their (paid by us) career. Some hope.

  26. 46
    Woooooooooah. says:

    Q15. Luciana Berger: Could the Prime Minister please explain to the constituents of Waverley in Liverpool, why is it that they’ve not been flooded. Is this not another example of preferable treatment by Eric Pickles.

  27. 49
    Shakin' Stevens says:

    Will someone suggest “Make it a Cracker, Jack” to BBCD?

  28. 55
    Citizen Khan says:

    Anna Soubry scares me.

  29. 56
    Cazual Observer 7 says:

    A Lib-Con coalition could be the worst of all possible outcomes.

  30. 58
    JenTheBlue says:

    Did someone suggest unicorns are not real? Surely you need to believe in unicorns to be in government?

  31. 59
    General Farquhart says:

    It’s the fat old cow Dorries now. Haven’t seen her for ages.

  32. 60
    Nads in bad shape says:

    Nads is going bald and her tum is falling over her belt

  33. 65
    Disgraceful says:

    Given SinnFein and SDLP refuse, point blank, to accept the idea of the National Crime Agency operating in Northern Ireland, what exactly does Cameron expect to achieve in endless discussions on the subject?
    He’s leading the country a merry dance, the criminals within the Irish Nationalist community will continue to operate with impunity, in fact operate with state sanction given that Labour gave them freedom passes and the millions of pounds earned through scams, tax avoidance and fuel laundering will continue to pour into the pockets of IRA scumbags around the South Armagh border area.

  34. 68
    Cazual Observer 7 says:

    B!lly Kebab ?

  35. 70
    Mitch says:

    What can Luciana offer young Billy?

  36. 72
    Luciana says:

    Silly Billy. Too many bergers.

  37. 73
    Posh Bird hasn't got a clue says:

    Lucy met B1lly in a Skip and Lucy wants Dave to offer B1lly a Job

    Bloody modbot

  38. 79
    Fatty Nads says:


  39. 80
    She is a waste of space. says:

    Does Luciana Berger MP appointed to Liverpool have any idea of what the PM’s job is?

    • 82
      Harman is evil says:

      If it wasn’t for her looks, she’d be working at her local Aldi.

      • 90
        was it something I said? says:

        No she wouldn’t. Aldi workers work hard.

        She’d be living in a tax-payer subsidised flat on benefit money. Like so many of her constituents.

    • 144
      (Rarely) Dangerous Brian says:

      She doesn’t even have any idea where Liverpool is.
      Oh and Ed Millit*at wants to know if it is anywhere near Doncaster.

  40. 81
    Jack Dromey says:

    I like chocolate pie!

  41. 83
    Care....us? says:

    Those flooding out of the chamber demonstrating their real concern about the Hyde Park bombings….

    • 133
      Spartacus says:

      and the attorney general grieve making one of the longest ‘not me guv’ series of statements I have ever heard.

      paraphrasing – but we will advertise for bloody sunday witnesses so we can nail british soldiers.

  42. 84
    Lucy lovely Legs says:

    Was my question said sensuously enough? Was it? Was it?

  43. 85
    USSR v EUSSR says:

    Brillo reporting Russia mobilising the troops.

    I hope the Baroness Ashton is their first target followed by Barroso.

    • 95
      Paper round says:

      Invading Brussels? It will be stopped by all the paper work.

      • 104
        Paniagua V5.1 says:

        Tell them to send the 15th Armoured Accountancy Division and audit the accounts while they are there.

    • 98
      Committee says:

      Is it old red tape or new red tape?

    • 100
      Anonymous says:

      So is Putin going to do a Sudetenland anex, a la Hitler?

      Strange for someone who claims he’s anti facist. I don’t trust his baboon face.

      • 108
        Cast Iron Dave says:

        I have bigger pecs. And check the ‘guns’ out *tenses arm*

      • 113
        The Russians are coming !!!! says:

        Crimea was always going to be at risk especially with the loons in Ukraine targetting Russian Speakers and outlawing Russian as language. Let’s hope they realise that at the first sight of Russian Tanks Willy, Cathy and Barry will be off over the horizon

    • 101
      Baroness Ashtray says:

      We like open borders.

      • 128
        SIZE 14 CARBON FOOTPRINT says:

        Putin must be issued with an ultimatum if he continues on this dangerous course the EU will be forced into unleashing the fearsome Luxemburg PanzerGruppe Barrosso supported by the fanatical Von Rumpoy Battalions of Third Europa Shock ARMY group WEST.

    • 106
      The most amusing claim ever says:

      Andrew Neil on BBC Politicsmade the very pertinent point that not one single MP raised the matter of UK Foreign policy in relation to the Ukraine or the UK being a major contributor to IMF/EU bail out of some £35 Billion but then again Osborne’s cheque book is always open unless you live in UK and have been flooded out or if you are disabled or if you are reliant on foods banks. Meanwhile Putin sticks two fingers up at Ashton;Hague and Kerry and puts all Russian Forces in West and Central Russia on combat alert effective 2pm Moscow Time…..the man is going to go for it despite Wee Willy’s warning last week

    • 111
      Socialism Ate My Future says:

      Russain Navy APCs and Marines had already arrived yesterday in Sevastapol:


      And they are now launching combat readiness drills:


      I dont think Putin knows we have Ashton leading from the front……

  44. 89
    WW3 says:


  45. 93
    Care....us? says:

    Emily Thornberry….what a fuckng cùnt she is.

  46. 97
    Harriet Harmskids says:

    PIE are stonking!

  47. 102
    Fella Tio says:

    Lucky Luciana has got a very wide mouth.

  48. 110
    Lard Pressclott of Beams, Bellies, Banjos, Bulimia, two bog seats, two Jags & Shags. says:

    I would like to call for a Hutton-style whitewash Enquiry into what happened with Harridan, Jacqueline and all those PIEs

    • 117
      Tony the "Jet Setter" says:

      I am always ready with advice on setting up enquiries. My consultancy fees are very reasonable………

  49. 111
    Harriet Harmskids says:

    I always wake up at the crack of Jack.

  50. 114
    whippet says:

    Anyone see Margaret Curran reduce climate change to a religious matter of deniers and believers? The argument should be science based you backward halfwit.
    What is this, the middle ages?

    • 125
      Currant is a Currant says:

      Brillo was brilliant, he just let her rant on feeding her so much rope that she hanged herself several times over. She really is a thick one.

  51. 121
    Little Willie says:

    I ha ha have here a piece of paper from Mr Pukin which states that his troops just need some exercise and I am a trusting do.., so that that then.

  52. 121
    The Crimean War, Part II says:

    Funny how the same places always cause trouble…

    Shocking that MPs weren’t prepared to discuss it.

  53. 124
    south7eventh says:

    What was the point of the display of purple?

  54. 129
    Anon. says:

    “NCCL also acted for some of those men when there were police enquiries”

    Did they receive money,legal aid,public money for this?

  55. 138
    broderick crawford says:

    I think the stewards will conclude after much forensic tape editing that the word was actually “Crackersnatch” …. a reference by a no doubt besotted admirer of the nether bodily attractions of the lady speaking at the time .

    Yes I agree , some poor lost , tumescent , misguided male MP who still harbours romantic illusions about the woman .

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Guido-hot-button (1) Guido-hot-button (1)

A confused Nick Griffin says Nigel Farage is a shill for the City, forgetting that City banks want to stay in the EU:

“Farage is a snake oil salesman, but a very good one. His supposed anti-immigration stance is all smoke and mirrors, as is his carefully cultivated image as a ‘man of the people’. The truth is that UKIP is a pro-immigration party that exists to lobby for the interests of the City of London.”

Alexrod says:

It’s money innit.

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