Whole House Implicated in Failure of the Environment Agency

That’s quite a parliamentary trick, to get it so that the Environment Agency’s workforce can’t be criticized.

To do so is to make “silly party political points”, to engage in “petty politics”, or “pointless procedural bickering”. It’s to play “the Blame Game”.

You’d think that would be quite a good game to play just now.

But I’m not sure we’d win.

The state agency responsible has flooding as its avowed policy. Many of its staff are incorrigible, clock-watching, arse-covering, time-thieving, tree-hugging, data-driven, screen-based, indolent, overpaid, unsupervised vole fanciers.

Or so a blogsite run by Agency workers maintains (insidetheenvironmentagency.co.uk).

Far from putting these arms-length public service defectives through the mill race of parliamentary opinion the Commons cosseted them as valiant servants of humanity. They were working “long hours” said John MacDonnell, “and I pay tribute to them.”

Yes, and something even more appreciated than “tribute” – overtime.

The whole House is implicated in the failure of the Environment Agency. The thing was created by politicians so politicians couldn’t be blamed. And now that the whole corporate disaster is starting to reveal itself, all we can expect is apologies.

“That’s why I apologized to the people of Somerset,” the big blubbery block of Keighley cheese kept saying, as he buttered up the Agency’s workers “risking their lives” (at Tesco’s buying up hoardable quantities of chocolate pots for their children in case of shortages owing to the floods).

No, Eric Pickles refused to criticise anyone except the Labour party, and denied ever having done so. Not the wretch Smith, nor the Environment Agency, certainly not the Secretary of State.

He and Owen Detached-Retina were as one, “two peas in a pod, two brothers from a different mother”. Yes, and a different father by the look of them. In fact, they aren’t brothers at all.

They are team players in the premier league of the Blame Game.

They were wrong, but it wasn’t their fault. They were right at the time. They will learn the lesson. And the lesson is – if you say you’re sorry you can’t be blamed.

So, for all the monitoring and minuting, all the strictures and structures, all the Flood Ambassadors and Local Resilience Councils – the whole damn shooting match is essentially out of democratic control.




Tip offs: 0709 284 0531
team@Order-order.com

Quote of the Day

Jeremy Corbyn at his leadership launch:

“Labour is stronger.”

Guidogram: Sign up

Subscribe to the most succinct 7 days a week daily email read by thousands of Westminster insiders.

Facebook

MATTHEW ELLIOTT ON WHY LEAVE WON MATTHEW ELLIOTT ON WHY LEAVE WON
OSBORNE GIVEN “SH*T” ROOM WITH NO VIEW OSBORNE GIVEN “SH*T” ROOM WITH NO VIEW
5,000,000 SIGNATURES: FEW POLICY CHANGES 5,000,000 SIGNATURES: FEW POLICY CHANGES
CORBYNISTAS USED CODE TO HIDE CASH-FOR-VOTES PLOT CORBYNISTAS USED CODE TO HIDE CASH-FOR-VOTES PLOT
First Lady Michelle Obama Carpool Karaoke First Lady Michelle Obama Carpool Karaoke
PMQ’s Sketch PMQ’s Sketch
How to Reach Westminster Politicians How to Reach Westminster Politicians
OWEN SMITH’S 999 EMERGENCY OWEN SMITH’S 999 EMERGENCY
MELANIA BORROWS FROM MICHELLE MELANIA BORROWS FROM MICHELLE
MAY: I WOULD PRESS NUCLEAR BUTTON MAY: I WOULD PRESS NUCLEAR BUTTON
New Uber Rival Tries to Get Unions Onside New Uber Rival Tries to Get Unions Onside
SMITH’S £200 BILION “NEW DEAL” PLEDGE BUSTED BY MCDONNELL SMITH’S £200 BILION “NEW DEAL” PLEDGE BUSTED BY MCDONNELL
CONGRATULATIONS MR AND MRS UMUNNA CONGRATULATIONS MR AND MRS UMUNNA
UKIP SEEKING TO TAKE ADVANTAGE OF “OILY” SMITH UKIP SEEKING TO TAKE ADVANTAGE OF “OILY” SMITH
FALLON WELCHES ON £1,000 PIERS MORGAN BET FALLON WELCHES ON £1,000 PIERS MORGAN BET
OWEN SMITH: IT WOULD BE “TEMPTING” TO BLOCK BREXIT OWEN SMITH: IT WOULD BE “TEMPTING” TO BLOCK BREXIT
NEW JUNIOR MINISTER APPOINTMENTS NEW JUNIOR MINISTER APPOINTMENTS
Social Media’s Filter Bubble Driving Political Anger Social Media’s Filter Bubble Driving Political Anger
Sun Names Elton John Sun Names Elton John
LABOUR MPS MAKE COMPLETE ANKARAS OF THEMSELVES LABOUR MPS MAKE COMPLETE ANKARAS OF THEMSELVES