February 10th, 2014

Staff Cuts are Not the Problem at the Environment Agency
Whistleblower: “Management Just Want to Expand Kingdom”

With slithering Chris Smith fighting for his job, the gloves are off and the cuts are being blamed for the fact that the Environment Agency is an over-staffed, badly managed graveyard for Labour figures of little note. 10% of the Environment Agency’s staff were cut, but that still leaves them with 11,200 pen pushers. Equivalent quangos in the rest of the world are much smaller, the Environment Agency for England alone has more staff than the Canadian, Danish, French, German, Swedish and Austrian equivalents. Combined. Only the US Environmental Protection Agency has more staff, (15,913 versus 11,200) hardly surprising given the US is some eighty times larger than the UK with six times the population. Last year this billion pound lefty-fest spent £395 million on staff (£592 million including pensions) compared to £219 million on capital projects, and just £20 million on maintaining rivers. More was spent on PR last year than on dredging – £2.7 million.

So what are the bosses up to? Well most of the board manage less than half-a-dozen days a month for their filthy lucre. Usually non-execs on boards have grey hairs and relevant knowledge and/or experience, yet this rule clearly does not apply to the EA. What is it that makes former Culture Secretary Chris Smith a suitable boss? When he’s not in charge of rivers and forests he’s a part time lecturer on the creative industries. Perhaps he could commission a play or a poetry reading to cheer up the people of Somerset. When he’s not wasting taxpayers money at the EA, he’s meddling over at the Advertising Standards Agency. Token Tory Peter Ainsworth was not a very good Shadow Defra minister and seems to be loitering around here while he holds out for that coveted Peerage. And what in Larry Whitty’s experience at the General Municipal Boilermakers & Allied Trade Union or as a former General Secretary of the Labour that qualified him for his seat on the board?

What exactly do all these staff do? One whistle-blower claims:

“it doesn’t help that 99% of the staff, mostly Environment and Flood Officers, refuse to do standby or volunteer to assist with flooding emergencies. This is despite it being in their contract. It leaves us undermanned and ill prepared, but managers won’t do anything about but claim they need to employ more staff. Really, management just want to expand their kingdoms”

As the Speccie leader this week says:

“Steadily, the Environment Agency has become a law unto itself. The idea behind its creation was to allow it to operate free from political interference. They now form a deeply politicised government in exile, with an incompetent but self-revering hierarchy that voters cannot dislodge. Nothing has more vividly conveyed the failure of the Environment Agency during this crisis than the lamentable public performances of its current chairman, the former Labour culture secretary Lord (Chris) Smith. His weak, half-shifty, half-arrogant interviews have shown him up to be a man wholly out of touch with the reality of the havoc his agency’s policies have wreaked. His blatherings about a choice between protecting ‘front rooms or farmland’ sums up his failure to understand the countryside, and the fact that most people have looked after both for generations. He is due to step down shortly, which is a shame: he ought to be fired for rank incompetence. But the reckoning should not stop there. It is now clear that the Environment Agency has become a threat to the countryside it was set up to serve. It ought to be dismantled, and its responsibilities shared out among smaller bodies which are much more obviously fit for purpose.”

It’s the drip, drip, drip that will get him.


251 Comments

  1. 1
    Blowing Donkey Whistles says:

    What would the fall out be if Camermong were to sack the useless fat faced sack of sh!te Smith?

    Like

    • 3
      seriously? says:

      Labour shrieking about ‘scape-goating’ and how due process hadn’t been followed and how the useless, incompetent Labour political appointee had been fired illegally. It’d be like Balls firing that Shoesmith woman. Good for a soundbite. Good to make you look decisive but she’s the one who walked with a million quid.

      Like

      • 15
        Anonymous says:

        Criminal prosecutions for willful damages at least.

        Like

        • 33
          C.O.Jones says:

          Actually lets keep it criminal. Like those Italian seismologists

          http://www.theguardian.com/world/2012/oct/23/jailing-italian-seismologists-scientific-community

          Like

          • prosecute please says:

            Any change of policy must have surveys, reports, qualified opinion consulted etc. If not, in this case, prosecute. Until these highly remunerated people, who live off the public hit, are prosecuted for their decisions based on no more than a whim, we will suffer and their toughing bandwagon show goes on.

            Like

          • Stating the obvious says:

            Somerset Levels:
            1. Large area of peat-based alluvial flood plain.
            2. Peak tide level is about 4.5m (13 feet) ABOVE mean elevation.
            3. It hasn’t stopped raaaining for a bazillion weeks.
            4. Last time I checked, politicians can’t stop it raining.
            5. People build houses on flood plain. (What could possibly go wrong.)
            6. Sooner or later, Nature does its thing.

            People with wet houses want someone (else) to pay.

            Like

          • Truth Teller says:

            Stating the obvious:
            Not true though for the Datchet and Old Windsor areas where the new, artificially created flood plain was designed in the 1980s so that the area would be sacrificed to protect areas downstream. Pity the householders there…

            Like

          • Stating the obvious says:

            Of course I feel sorry for them, but it doesn’t change the fact that the houses shouldn’t have been built there, and people shouldn’t have bought them.

            I’ve no soft spot for either the EA or Cameron’s bunch, but they really aren’t responsible for severe weather conditions or the fact that all departments (and the whole country in general) are skint thanks to the last bunch of tossers that spent all the money (and then some).

            Like

          • Anonymous says:

            Isnt the real root that there are too many people in the UK? They need to be housed somewhere. Its overpopulation, not climate change that is the problem. Globally too.

            Like

      • 203
        Col. Stok says:

        Think laterally. Set the useless smith up with some tempting (to him) rent boy with the appropriate contraband for his use. Then let the press have the lot unless he resigns. Our security services used to do this sort of thing all the time.
        Or better still just pop him in a hold all for a long weekend and leave in the bathroom.

        Like

    • 13
      The EU says:

      Common purpose operatives may not terminate other useful idiots.

      Like

    • 26
      Mitch says:

      To be fair, we do have a bit more coastline than Austria.

      Like

    • 30
      Just 30 minutes from the Somerset Levels. The EA spent £10 million on...Themselves says:

      A new Bristol office block has been named Britain’s greenest building

      The Environment Agency’s £10-million headquarters in Deanery Road, behind the Council House, has achieved the highest score ever awarded by the Building Research Establishment (BRE) for its environmental credentials.

      The building replaces the boarded-up Cabot House, which had been empty since the early 1990s.

      Developer Westmark said it used the latest technologies, innovative design and stringent site management to ensure a high level of environmental performance in both the construction and use of the building.

      http://www.bristolpost.co.uk/New-Bristol-office-block-greenest-Britain/story-11247134-detail/story.html

      Like

      • 50
        Pickles McDonut says:

        So the EA is renting a modern, energy efficient building from a developer?

        STOP THE FUCKING PRESS.

        Like

        • 74
          The Public says:

          If you think spending £10 million on a green temple so that its staff can rule in luxury while the people below suffer floods in their homes because of their “politicised” eco decisions, is best use of public money. Then you either have a warpeped sense of humour or you are a Lefty Loon.

          Like

          • Pickles McDonut says:

            RENTING in a building which cost £10 million to build. And has lots of other offices which private companies rent.

            I may have piggy eyes but at least I can read.

            Like

          • Bristol Council says:

            The EA designed and financed that Green Building.

            Like

          • M­a­­­­q­bo­­ul says:

            So the shiny pantsed carpet dwellers get a spanking new office in Brissol.

            Like

          • German Honeymoon Horse says:

            They are suffering floods because they live on a flood plain that is below peak tide level, and because it has rained for about fucking forever.

            I am amazed that the EA work from offices though. They should be eviscerated immediately. At the very least.

            Like

          • Parson Demand says:

            The levels are below sea level for 8 ish hours a day and behind gates but for the other 14 hours they are designed to be drained of the fresh water flowing in.

            The EA decided off their own back that this land claimed from the sea centuries ago should be returned to the sea and thus decided (off their own back again) to stop clearing those vital drains of silt.

            Result is that the normal winter floods that did not reach elevated houses are now high enough to swamp all the houses.

            Whether the levels should be given back to the sea or not is a different debate and it certainly should NOT be the EA’s decision.

            Worth noting though that there is no “natural” land in the UK. All of it is managed in some way or another.

            Like

      • 146
        Greychatter says:

        The trouble is the building still gets wet when it rains!!

        Like

    • 38
      Sally Bercow says:

      Pissing myself.

      Like

    • 84
      Hoddy says:

      Well after Dave says he fully supports the agency during another visit to flood hit areas I think his palatial arse is quite safe

      Like

    • 141
      Fish says:

      I liked the way that Slippery Smith when confronted by the criticism of his leadership, indignantly responded by say that that was unfair on the EA staff who had been working their sock off.

      Smiffy, it was YOU who the finger was been pointed at. Don’t use your staff as a human shield

      It was also interesting to hear him disown the policy of returning the Levels to nature – he said this morning that he hadn’t seen the paper setting out the 2008 EA strategy

      And he has now changed his position 3 times on dredging. Before Xmas they were clear that dredging was NOT required, then last week it wasn’t the only answer, now it is needed (and the Government won’t give them the money for the dredging that they said wasn’t needed).

      Like

      • 153
        Greychatter says:

        Take the money out of the EA’s 500 million pension pot!!

        Like

      • 199
        Smith is a Scumbag says:

        Yes I noticed that. No one had accused the staff of anything, except having him as a very bad leader. He twisted his reply. SCUMBAG

        Like

        • 242
          The Usual.... says:

          Not at all.

          Pickles referred ironically to ‘experts’ at the EA. Lord Smith is in a management role and so clearly as dependent on expert advice as the Government generally.

          Like

      • 208
        CFD trader says:

        “responded by say that that was unfair on the EA staff who had been working their sock off.”

        Redirect and obfuscate. Its what they do.

        Like

    • 185
      Lord Smith of Finsbury Park Public Conveniences says:

      You can’t sack me-I’m indispensable.

      Like

    • 241
      The Usual.... says:

      Hmmmmmm…………………… looks a very silly piece now!

      Like

    • 248
      we have a right to knoe says says:

      guido,

      Smith has 11 jobs……what are they…..are they all public sector…..what is his total salary and for how many days a week?

      Like

    • 250
      b jones says:

      or better still sack the useless really fat sack of shite Pickles!

      Like

  2. 2
    seriously? says:

    The EA is no more or less a ‘Government in exile’ than the NHS or education or the Scottish Parliament (although that back-fired early and spectacularly).

    All public bodies have been set up or infiltrated en masse by Labour with the express purpose of keeping tens/hundreds of thousands/millions of like-minded people on the public pay-roll and available to mobilise ‘spontaneously’ at the beck and call of Labour politicians.

    Like

    • 10
      C.O.Jones says:

      How else would they find work? The useless arts degree state employment seekers! Degrees unfit for their roles! Just jobs for Labour boys and girls.

      Like

      • 133
        Bolshevik Broadcasting Corporation says:

        So it costs nearly £400 million in salaries FOR ONE YEAR???

        Like

        • 174
          The Critic says:

          Check the budget. The EA gets 700 million from govt plus 500 million in charges. They don’t need more money.

          Like

          • We KNOW liblabcon are liars.. we can hope UKIP less so. says:

            http://www.north-mill-avoncliff.co.uk/the-short-story

            ” 500 million in charges”

            Ah! I think I see a problem. …

            Water extraction licence <£200 (from the EA for allowing water to PASS THROUGH a generating device)

            Currently costs surpassing £1.5 million at ONE PROJECTalone..

            See link above.
            Most definitely a shadow government. They even ignore Judges!

            Like

  3. 4
    Tardkiller says:

    don’t forget the equipment sales to scrap value of a lot of near-new long arm dredgers

    Like

  4. 5
    RomaBob.... Beeeeg Issue! says:

    Unfit for purpose? Labour would, if in Gov’t, be telling us that they have 24 hours to save the EA …….

    Like

    • 113
      wellies in the office says:

      Unfit for purpose? LibDem would, if fully in Gov’t, be telling us that they have 24 hours to save the EU …….

      Like

  5. 6
    Caradog says:

    It’s time Lord Water Parsnip was shown the door!

    Like

    • 32
      too late for decency says:

      Police raid on EA offices, with BBC live, no commentary from BBC or their buddies. Commentary from Guido Fawkes. No lunch today you have work to do.

      Like

    • 182
      Blind Pew says:

      All they need is a tall ship and a star to steer her by.

      Like

  6. 6
    M­a­­­­q­bo­­ul says:

    Local management for local people. We don’t want no trouble ‘ere.

    Like

  7. 8
    Sack quisling Dave says:

    This all stinks of Common Purpose yet again.

    They are the enemy within.

    Like

  8. 9
    The BBC says:

    It’s climate change stupid!

    Like

  9. 11
    Sally says:

    Talking of drip drip, that’s what John is like when he reaches climax. Rather pitiful. I prefer a virile man who shoots a massive load out of his BBC.

    Like

    • 39
      Wendi Deng says:

      Arse-Oh, Sarry.
      “Brairs Butt, Cock”
      and me rike his shining brue eyes and his shining pratimum visa

      Like

  10. 12
    CARBON FOOTPRINT says:

    It is time that these agencies were disbanded the were only set up to protect the Government from public scrutiny ,having sprung up in the hundreds since EU membership.
    Things like the dredging of rivers were the responsibility of ,of bodies like The Ministry of Public Building and Works and directly accountable to parliament on a daily basis.
    Although far from perfect there was far fewer layers of buck passing and obfuscation that we are seeing with the ongoing flooding problems.
    These agencies have been packed with Labour placemen and apparachniks over the years ,now the taxpayers are paying the price of this deliberate negligence.

    Like

  11. 13
    Sally says:

    I told John I was going out to get a facial. The naive fool thought I meant the kind of facial you get at a beauty salon.

    Like

    • 48
      Wendi Deng says:

      Ancient Zhōngguó medecin for young face make happy old man with much money.
      Love juice of himalaya tiger dong, or wanki-wanki-splash from nice butt nice leg man over face. rub in good.

      Like

    • 172
      Cinna says:

      Is John partial to cream pies?

      Like

  12. 16
    Truthteller says:

    There’s some sh!t being spouted by all and sundry. Climate change, global warning, austerity etc.. All wanting there pound of flesh, and the fools keep voting for the same old sh!t.

    Like

  13. 17
    william says:

    Abolish the EA. Give the money,ringfenced, to the county councils. Use local contractors. Shut every EA office. Dismiss all their staff.

    Like

    • 35
      M­a­­­­q­bo­­ul says:

      It’s like the MOD, bloated with management and clerical staff. When there’s cuts required the managers protect their own little positions and sack those on the front line actually doing the work.

      Nothing wrong with a national body – not every issue is local – but you get the feeling the EA is fat and self serving. (In that respect Pickles would have been well advised to have kept out of this one).

      Like

    • 40
      Pickles McDonut says:

      Yeah its not like catchment areas or rivers run across multiple county and council borders. I’m sure they would be able to work better than a single agency with overall oversight. Definitely.

      Like

    • 118
      No cuts, Abolish says:

      Save a billion or two annually.

      Like

  14. 18
    Sally says:

    I love my husband. *genuine face* I did nothing wrong. *innocent face* I just like having fun. *winks* All I did was kiss a mate. *innocent face* It was perfectly innocent. And tonight I’m going to see another mate. *pulls down skirt, bends over dustbin in alleyway and opens legs*

    Like

  15. 19
    spitting image of a trougher says:

    Smith wants the Somerset levels to have a dirty watermark boundary that is an image of his face as would be seen on google satellite maps.

    Like

  16. 20
    Ron Barras says:

    Start with “Lord” Smith. Then sack the whole agency.

    Like

  17. 21
    Axe The Telly Tax & Religion & Kill All Eco-loons says:

    It’s high time for that bonfire of the quangos!

    Like

  18. 22
    Everhard Lord Smith's very private secretary says:

    Lord Smith cannot deal with this at the moment he is very busy on a fact finding tour of gents public toilets on Hampstead Heath, in case they are about to flood, he started this vital inspection on Friday night and hasn’t been seen since.

    Like

    • 129
      It's the cistern that's wrong says:

      Flush him out NOW!

      Like

    • 135
      Taxpayer says:

      Chris Smith is the Reverend Flowers of the Environment

      Parachuted into a job for which he is patently unsuitable on a grossly overpaid part time basis

      And lifting shirts during the rest of the time

      They are taking the piss on an unheard of scale

      Like

  19. 23
    Lord Bumboy says:

    This is really most unfair on my poor chum Lord Smith, who had to miss the opening of a friend’s gallery and an enthusiastic rimming from his boyfriend just to go to the distant provinces to sympathise with these oiks. If he can’t have three jobs then how can he afford the house in Islington? Or the rough trade from strappingly well-hung male escorts?

    Like

  20. 24
    Sally says:

    John says I’ve made him a cuckold. I told him he was already a cock who’s old.

    Like

  21. 25
    Jasmin Beckett says:

    Floods make me cry. I want all rivers dead.

    Like

  22. 28
    Tosser Dave says:

    We need to keep Smith to take the flak.

    It’s no good blaming Liebour. I’ve been in “power” now for 4 years and I’ve done absolutely fuck all to sort out the Environment Agency and all the other quangos.

    I repeat. I am a total failure. Excuse me while I commit hara-kiri.

    Like

  23. 29
    Ed Miliband says:

    The flooding just proves the cost of living crisis and the need for a 50p top rate of tax to avoid a double dip of the cost of bedroom tax living top rate crisis dip.

    Like

  24. 34
    Proftastic says:

    Living in the north I know one or two lay abouts who work for the EA despite poor qualifications. Always wondered just how they obtained their employment.
    Thanks Guido, its all very clear to me now.

    Like

  25. 36
    Mother Nature says:

    Ha Fucking Ha — floods inside the M25 — apocalypse time — I’ll get you LibLabConners, just see if I don’t.

    Like

  26. 37

    Reblogged this on Gavin Maclure's Musings and commented:
    I couldn’t put it better myself. The EA is a quango pure and simple, set up and managed by New Labour to pay the mortgages of Blairites who have no understanding of the countryside as they don’t represent them.

    Send the Army in. Scrap the EA and devolve it’s powers and resources to the regions.

    Like

  27. 43
    SNAFU says:

    just heard on the radio parts of Londistan is now flooded, so all the labour luvvies will be running around squealing and having a fit of the vapours.

    Like

    • 54
      Sod Londistan says:

      Leave the Tube flood doors open — that will get rid of a good few thousand cubic metres — might even drown a few politicians as well with a bit of luck

      Like

  28. 44
    At a cinema near you says:

    ROBOCOCK, the epic tale of a thickie plod with a 70s porn moustache who claimed to witness a shockingly scandalous incident of a minister calling another cop a pleb but who it later turns out was lying through his yellow teeth and had never been there.

    Starring the guy who played Tucker in Grange Hill who bears a striking resemblance to the copper, and co-starring Ed Miliband as a tosspot who stood up in the House and smeared the minister before an investigation had even taken place.

    ROBOCOCK. Rated 5 for Ed’s IQ.

    Like

  29. 47
    Bleakly hilarious Hugo Rifkind says:

    Like

  30. 49
    SNAFU says:

    Come to think of it if Londistan has been hit by the floods they are well within their rights to use the foreign aid budget.

    Like

  31. 51
    C.O.Jones says:

    Somerset should not complain, at least now its badger free.

    Like

  32. 55
    Lizzie Robards says:

    UKIP warned of a flood of Romanians but got that wrong. Seems the climate change warnings were right all along.

    Like

  33. 56
    EA? says:

    They make video games, don’t they?

    Like

    • 73
      David Cameroń says:

      Dang, that’s where I’ve heard of them. They make some of my favourite games.

      Thanks for telling me, it’s been driving me nuts this last week with all the media coverage.

      They must have a pretty good simulation coming out with all the hype.

      Like

  34. 60
    This is turning into Dave's Katrina says:

    Like

  35. 61
    The Bastard Environment agency says:

    This is what the bastards did to an area of land in Cornwall used by the public since the war. They certainly have no shortage of money, travel in the best 4x4s money can buy and always go in groups. This fence must have cost a fortune and it is totally undemocratic and anti public.

    Fence makes park like ‘PoW camp’

    http://www.thisiscornwall.co.uk/Fence-makes-park-like-PoW-camp/story-15364332-detail/story.html#axzz2svNX0dTz

    Like

    • 66
      Christ almighty says:

      Just smash the fucking fence down and be done with it.

      Like

    • 76
      Pickles McDonut says:

      What sort of PoW camps have those retards been to? Ones for fat dwarves that cant climb a 4 ft wooden fence. An undemocratic anti dwarf fence?

      Like

    • 78
      Association of mosses, liverworts and hornworts says:

      The fuckimng birds got us anyway :(

      Like

    • 95
      Cinna says:

      £30000 to protect some “moss”? Don’t they know this is “austerity Britain”?

      Like

      • 101
        Cinna says:

        Come to think of it, I can’t get rid of the bloody stuff on my lawn. Can I apply for a grant to protect it?

        Like

      • 139
        It's madness says:

        The moss was just an afterthought they came up with when the locals complained.

        Given that the area was always used by locals for horse riding, walking, dog exercise etc and there was always moss, then any sensible person would conclude that these activities were good for the moss.

        Like

    • 229
      Anonymous says:

      Surely if it has been used that long and by the public, there is a precedent to continue its free, unrestricted use?

      Like

  36. 62
    Very single fucking useless LibLabCon politician says:

    I hope the wind turbines are turning so that those affected by the floods can feel reassured that all is ok and we are on their side.

    Like

    • 105
      Cinna says:

      There’s 20 odd turbines I can see from where I am now sitting. None appear to be turning. Wrong sort of wind?

      Like

      • 181
        Jack Ketch says:

        No, the wind is going TOO FAST. Those con-job wind turbines are designed to stall when windspeeds exceed 130MPH. As a gale of 80mph will often exceed the survival speed of wind turbines in gusts, they are rigged to stall at much lower speeds. Or in the case of your observation, the recent gales may just have broken them anyway.

        Like

  37. 67
  38. 70
    The EA: River Dredging and Flood Defence, to Dredge or Not to Dredge says:

    Like

    • 82
      Judge Dredge says:

      I AM THE LAW

      Like

    • 85
      Pickles McDonut says:

      Your “Common Sense”, your “Reseach” and your “Science” has no place in this house of unevidenced, headline grabbing, anecdotal bollox.

      Now has anyone got any biscuits?

      Like

    • 112
      The Residents point of view says:

      Except the Somerset levels are not natural floodplain and river. The land was reclaimed from the sea centuries ago and the only way to keep the sea from reclaiming them is to drain the man made waterways of the silt that is washed down from the surrounding hills.

      Also an intrinsic part of the engineering is to spread the dredged silt in the land as both a fertilisers and land level enhancer.

      It seems the EU has decided to class the silt as environmental waste so if now spread over the land as it has been for hundreds of years it would be taxed.

      The EA is applying floodplain whimsical thought as a solution to reclaimed land engineering. And sinisterly it appears that they had decided that the levels should be reverted to marsh anyway, without telling or asking anyone. They even financed a sanctuary for wading birds to this end.

      Like

      • 136
        C.O.Jones says:

        If the EA has classed the silt as environmental waste then it is subject to landfill tax. Now get the calculator out!

        Like

      • 167
        CARBON FOOTPRINT says:

        If lived on the levels I’d take a shotgun to as many of the ecoloonies precious birds as I could

        Like

      • 175
        Pickles McDonut says:

        How did they dredge the rivers in the 1600’s?

        Like

        • 200
          Teacher says:

          Same way this still do it in parts of SE Asia. A raft is poled downriver or drawn by animal power. Wooden buckets are dragged along the river bed and spoil is dumped on the raft for transfer to the river banks periodically. In shallow areas a chain of people with shovels and buckets to the job.
          The Romans were dredging rivers, canals and harbours a lot earlier than that although they had plenty of workers on minimum wage (ie. nothing).

          Like

    • 157
      Environ says:

      Tis dem fackin tesco trolleys in rivers and streams causin the problem.

      Like

  39. 71
    Sir Dando Tweakeshafte says:

    There is, one gathers, some relief in the West Country that his Lordship hasn’t announced that he stands behind the Somerset farmer…

    Like

  40. 72
    Axe The Telly Tax & Religion & Kill All Eco-loons says:

    I do hope someone (i.e. Lynton Crosby) is telling Dave that fluffy animals don’t vote but angry farmers and residents do and that motorists vastly outnumber cyclists and that electricity and gas bill payers vastly outnumber eco-loons in Islington.

    Like

  41. 80
    Greenie Env bod says:

    But what about the birds and the bees and the flowers? They must be protected at ALL cost. OK, maybe not at the cost of PR or the hard working senior executive and quango boards salaries and pay offs. Priorities please. The flooded people can swim or walk but what about the piggies? ….No, I don’t mean Smith and co.

    Like

  42. 81
    Owen Jones says:

    Lady with trolley at M&S would bring medal glory to Team GB if passive-aggressive supermarket slalom were an Olympic event.

    Like

  43. 86
    What sort of meat does he 'eat'? says:

    Like

    • 138
      The BBC says:

      BBC meat.

      Like

      • 193
        The DG says:

        We call it forced pork.

        Like

      • 209
        (Rarely) Dangerous Brian says:

        Priceless on the Andrew Marr show moaning about the way anonymous internet contributors can say what they want.
        Mr Jones, I will come out from behind my pseudonym and debate with you on any topic.
        Unfortunately I know I cannot win before we start, as jumped up leftie hypocrites are never worng.

        Like

  44. 88
    cheche says:

    Of course the politicians dont want to blame each other, but it doesnt apply when it comes to blaming bank managers

    Like

  45. 89
    Anonymous says:

    NOTHING about the floods on Red Ed twitter feed. Does he know or even care?

    Like

  46. 96
    Brimstone says:

    All watercourses were under the control of local boards (the Thames Conservancy Board as an example) manned by local people who knew the area. John Major’s government nationalised them in to the “Environment Agency” so that EU diktats could be imposed.

    DEFRA is imposing EU diktats by paying farmers to dig up trees and hedgerows which causes water to run off rather than soak in to the ground.

    I’m not great fan of his, but George Monbiot sets out the situation of one government department conflicting with another as they both follow EU rules.

    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2541773/Drowned-EU-millions-Thought-extreme-weather-blame-floods-Wrong-The-real-culprit-European-subsidies-pay-UK-farmers-destroy-trees-soak-storm.html

    Like

  47. 98
    Sally Bercow says:

    DLT Found not guilty!

    Get in there Rolf !

    Like

    • 183
      Tony Blackarse says:

      Yes Chums, our old mate DLT is fighting for his career, and I think we ought
      to be aware of the implications if this great British pop-picker gets sent down.

      Like

  48. 100
    The British Public says:

    Boooo.

    We are not happy.

    Like

  49. 109
    Zoylander says:

    Lord Smith is as hated in Somerset as was Judge Jeffries,
    people have long memories….

    Like

  50. 115
    i don't n eed no doctor says:

    fuck off mod.

    Like

  51. 125
    EU Funded Pro-EU Troll says:

    Vote UKIP

    Like

  52. 127
    Old Grumpy says:

    Much of the flooding now being experienced cannot be laid at the door of the EA. We do have to realise that nature is showing her teeth somewhat this winter.

    HOWEVER!!!!!!!!!!

    Areas like the Somerset Levels, Sussex and the IOW, to quote just a few are the result of either gross incompetence or due to the dead hand of the RSPB! We shouldn’t ignore the power of this POLITICAL ORGANISATION, which masquerades as a charity.

    The EA has, since 2008, given them some £33.5m, most of it to flood the Levels!

    You might ask why and wonder about it, as I have. Well you don’t have to look too far. Smiff’s deputy, one Dr Brown, is also a member of the RSPB Council.

    Make of that what you will.

    Like

    • 156
      CARBON FOOTPRINT says:

      They all piss in the same pot

      Like

    • 180
      Bolshevik Broadcasting Corporation says:

      Absolutely. None of these so-called charities should be allowed to use the name ‘charity’ to describe themselves any more. Look at the RSPCA. Look at Oxfam. They are nothing more than left-wing political pressure groups. Why do they get millions and millions from central government?

      The worst thing is the general public don’t realise what has happened.

      Like

    • 207
      Penfold says:

      His predecessor, Baroness Young (Lab) (2000-2008), was ex head of RSPB and English Nature.
      Also involved with the Care Quality Commission, ’nuff said.

      Like

    • 223
      Fog says:

      Evan Davis asked Baroness Young this morning on ‘Today’ wasn’t it true that when she was at the Environment agency, a report which advised ‘More water more wildlife’ was implemented as policy. She reluctantly replied something about taking the advice of the ‘experts’

      Like

  53. 128
    Anonymous says:

    Seems EA staff are being warned not to comment on public forums in face of disciplinary action under bringing the organisation into disrepute. So much for openness.

    Like

  54. 130
    i don't n eed no doctor says:

    Why is the UK media so pathetic. What happened to good journalism?

    Like

    • 177
      Proftastic says:

      I have been trying to find where journalism ends and activism begins, they appear to have some sort of open border policy in effect.

      Like

  55. 132
    Prayer to the Rain God says:

    Please let Witney flood – please please please please please…

    Like

  56. 147
    Thinking of Sochi says:

    On the bright side, if we get a cold snap, perhaps the Winter Para-Olympics could be moved to Somerset.

    Like

  57. 148
    Cinna says:

    “At least 21 insurgents have been killed in central Iraq after a car bomb was detonated by accident, reports say.

    They were filming a propaganda video of the would-be suicide attacker when the blast occurred, the head of the local Sunni pro-government militia in Jilam told the AFP news agency”.

    Nuff said.

    Like

  58. 149
    Water World says:

    Like

  59. 152
    I'll get me wellies says:

    Like

  60. 165
    Jack says:

    Where is Engineer when we need him?

    It seems to me that by closihg the Thames Barrage or whatever they call it, they have succeeded in floogingbthe whole of the Thames Valley

    Bloody funny if yiu dont live there

    There will be a Stockbrokers Revolt

    Like

  61. 168
    Kevin Bollox says:

    Smithy is a stupid fucking wank head. He should tell his cute black boyfriend to take his 12″ cock out of his tight white arse so that he can concentrate on the day job.

    Like

  62. 176
    Jack says:

    Who are the PR conmen ripping us off for £2 million?

    Like

  63. 186
    Shergar says:

    Cameron should summarily dismiss Smith for incompetence,the man,Smith is a total prick,typical of the left political classes.

    Like

  64. 190
    Jack Ketch says:

    It occurs to me that having a nancy-boy expert on ballet as Chairman of an agency that requires specifically commercial acumen and some understanding of technical matters is a pretty stupid idea. As it is a part-time job, I am surprised that the DoE does not actively seek proven “turn-around” artists who have retired from the business sector. There are plenty of gentlemen with real weight who would love to get out of the house for a couple of days a week who have real skills.
    If being a player for the “other team” is a sine qua non, Lord Browne, former head of BP is unemployed at present.

    Like

  65. 192
    Weak little pussy manboy says:

    Do you think Ed Milliband could lift a sandbag?
    I don’t.

    Like

  66. 194
    Libertie(s) says:

    Its just homophobia

    Like

  67. 195
    Julian the Wonderhorse says:

    Another Crystal Methodist, no experience or knowledge of the industry, just a nice little earner for labour insiders. No doubt when they asked Lord Smith about the Somerset Levels he thought it was a poem by Wordsworth

    Like

  68. 197
    Anonymous says:

    Fuck it – give the £1.2 B to the Royal Engineers and get them on the job – this country will be watertight within the week.

    Like

  69. 203
    Penfold says:

    If he was sacked, his contract probably contains a clause that he gets a huge pay off. And likely these contracts probably do not contain a failure to perform clause which obviates pay offs and claws back pension payments etc.

    We are seeing the impact of the politicisation of Quangoes and Agencies, with the imposition of useless ex-politico’s as heads.
    Additionally we are now having to deal with the reckoning caused by policies imposed by the EU and slavishly enforced by UK bodies.

    Dave promised a bonfire of the quangoes, we are still waiting, he needs to get a grip. He should ignore the whinging from the left, and sack incompetent and useless agency heads and bring in competent experts who will take direction from local bodies and government. No more jobs for party hacks with a common purpose.

    C’mon Dave, or are your matches still damp from there outing down the Somerset Levels?

    Like

  70. 221
    Nemesis says:

    Even worse than Lord Smith is the opposition Environment woman Angela Eagle. What a prevaricating Hunt she is. Typical of Labour always quick to complain but have no answers. She says dredging would not have prevented the floods. We are all well aware of that you stupid woman, what dredging would have achieved is massively alleviate the situation. It’s tree huggers like Eagle that have caused much of this mess by worrying more about fucking voles than people. Oh, and now all the voles are dead under flood water.

    Like

  71. 227
    Truthteller says:

    People in Egham want the Army sent in, but what do they get? Duck Tours, London’s Amazing Amphibious Adventure.

    Like

  72. 228
    Blowing Donkey Whistles says:

    This is rapidly turning into Daves Hurricane Katrina moment. How the funk can this flooding of the Thames come as a shock to people and WTF weren’t the EA warning people days ago? It’s not difficult you mongtarded EA fukwits.

    Like

  73. 236
    Karl Marx says:

    Lame Blabour! Tories have been in power for almost 4 years if these people are so incompetent why didn’t they remove them? They need to stop acting like they have only been the job a few weeks and take some responsibility.

    Like

  74. 238
    Marsh Warbler says:

    If the EA has decided that reclaimed land should be returned to the sea, then half of Eastern England needs to watch out.

    Like

  75. 239
    craigm350 says:

    Reblogged this on CraigM350.

    Like

  76. 240
    Ohthisbloodypc says:

    This is the wettest Environment Agency since records began

    There has been a massive downpour of public cash, and there aren’t enough luvvies to soak it all up.

    We need to start planting more quangos.

    Like

  77. 243
    ron says:

    Guido, the USA is not 80 times larger than the UK.

    It is 40 times larger.

    Like

  78. 245
    freddy says:

    Lord Smith goes in 3 months he is at present sorting out his massive pay off i have this on good authority check out Avoncliff Mill blog £1.5 million sanctioned on £150 licence to cover up unlawful activities £650.000 since they were beat at Judicial Revue maliciously David Jordan is the sanctioner

    Like

  79. 246
    Jes says:

    Sad state of affairs when the powers that be spend so much on PR. Here’s a suggestion: cancel your PR spend and use it instead to help the environment and those whose lives have been impacted by the floods. Just a thought. ..

    Like

  80. 247
    Shock Horror - how could you say such a thing says:

    Just a snapshot view on the subject of expenditure and manpower, but I am surprised at the sheer quantity of clothing and gagetry worn and carried by the people we see on our TV screens, mostly the yellow covered ones. I don’t know who is who but a lot of money has been spent here for sure. Many of them seem rather over-dressed and over equipped. I know I know, ‘elfnsafety’ can’t take risks with their lives etc. etc., but I suspect it’s been spent here because its easier to do this than spend money on more difficult projects and it sounds good in reports that all this has been done. And then there is manpower, they seem to collect in large groups, strikes me there’s overmanning going on, another ‘elnsafety’ justification no doubt. That is, the ‘elfnsafety’ of the employees of these quangoes rather than health and safety of the lives and property of the people they are truly meant to protect. They could get to more people who need helping if they spread their staff out a bit thinner.

    Like

  81. 249
    stushie says:

    The quicker WATERSHED management boards are set up the better.
    The E A has been an unmitigated disaster with NO accountability anywhere.

    Like

  82. 251
    Dessert Rat says:

    Fucking lazy twats

    Like


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