SKETCH: There’s Been a 40% Reduction in Knife Crime Statistics

It was Home Office questions.

“What can be done about the appalling knife crime statistics?” you ask. It’s already been done. There’s been a 40 per cent reduction in knife crime statistics. And not just in the British Crime Survey but in NHS knife wound records. What does this mean? The NHS has poached its statisticians from the police. A triumph of best practice.

Andrew Bridgen said that Leicestershire police got less money per head than Northumbria police but had achieved a greater fall in crime figures than that northern wasteland of blackmailing, dog-fighting cage-warriors.

Jim Cunningham asked for the crime figures for the West Midlands but the minister didn’t have them to hand. Make them up, man! Don’t wait for someone to make them up for you. “There will be a 28 per cent fall in the violent crime figures in each of the next three quarters running up to the election.”

We were then told that “bus-related crime in Lewisham had fallen 14 per cent”. What an unimaginative statistic. Surely they can do better than that?

Jack Dromey struck a cautionary note talking of the “insult added to injury” for victims of crimes of violence when criminals got off cock-free. I think I heard that right.

Sczyvvyrn (pronounced Chevawn) McDonagh gave another puff to her campaign: the Bobby Tax. It’s like the Bedroom Tax in one regard – it’s not a tax.

Hopeful recruits pay £1,000 to take a test to get their Certificate of Knowledge in Policing, and then apply for a position without any guarantee of a job. It does sound scandalous but it’s a charge, a fee – totally unrelated to the Spare Room Subsidy (itself a misnomer).

What else? Did I hear Keith Vaz suggesting a Home Affairs sub committee set itself up at Luton airport on a permanent basis to send a message to the Daily Mail. I don’t think I did, in point of fact, but the point holds.

It seems 366 British citizens have gone to Syria to fight there – for whom we don’t know. Restrictions were demanded. What, even for the Christians? Or the Syrian People’s Secular Front?

Here’s a thought experiment. Would we have sought to track down and confine Brits who went to fight in the Spanish civil war? If not, what’s the difference in principle?

In ancilliary news: Yvette Cooper looks recovered from her slump. She will be taking credit for getting a hundred or so of Syrian children into this country as refugees. And people say politicians have no heart. Shame on you!

And finally, Peter Bone (he still gets the Speaker-treatment when his name called). He pointed out the 30 pages of New Clauses and the 50 Government amendments to the Immigration Bill in Report on Thursday.

Mrs May said the amendments were mainly technical, and there wouldn’t be more time allocated because that might mean they’d get to Nigel Mills’ deeply embarrassing amendment which might mean we’d have to leave the EU.

I don’t think she did put it quite in those words but her meaning was clear.



Tip offs: 0709 284 0531
team@Order-order.com

Quote of the Day

FT leader on Labour’s “Jewish problem”:

“If Mr Corbyn had serious aspirations to leadership he would tackle this problem head-on. Instead it falls to Labour’s moderates to ask themselves how long they will tolerate this state of affairs. Edmund Burke wrote that “the only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing”. Labour’s inaction over anti-Semitism is a stigma that must now be erased by the good people in its ranks.”

Top Posts This Week

Guidogram: Sign up

Subscribe to the most succinct 7 days a week daily email read by thousands of Westminster insiders.

Facebook

KEN: “HITLER WAS SUPPORTING ZIONISM” KEN: “HITLER WAS SUPPORTING ZIONISM”
NEUBERGER AND LEVY ON LABOUR’S ANTI-SEMITISM NEUBERGER AND LEVY ON LABOUR’S ANTI-SEMITISM
RUPA HUQ DEFENDS NAZ SHAH’S ANTI-SEMITISM RUPA HUQ DEFENDS NAZ SHAH’S ANTI-SEMITISM
Carly Fiorina Sings Lullaby Carly Fiorina Sings Lullaby
BRADFORD COUNCILLOR POSTED GOEBBELS NAZI FILM “THE ETERNAL JEW” BRADFORD COUNCILLOR POSTED GOEBBELS NAZI FILM “THE ETERNAL JEW”
NAZ SHAH SUSPENDED BY LABOUR NAZ SHAH SUSPENDED BY LABOUR
Naz Shah’s Pro-Hamas Tweets Naz Shah’s Pro-Hamas Tweets
FARAGE RESPONDS TO “PONCEY” JIBE FARAGE RESPONDS TO “PONCEY” JIBE
PM: “EXTRAORDINARY” NAZ SHAH STILL HAS LABOUR WHIP PM: “EXTRAORDINARY” NAZ SHAH STILL HAS LABOUR WHIP
SHADOW CABINET SPLIT: LISA NANDY TELLS CORBYN TO SACK NAZ SHAH SHADOW CABINET SPLIT: LISA NANDY TELLS CORBYN TO SACK NAZ SHAH
TREASURY CAN PREDICT FUTURE TO 2030, CAN’T WORK OUT COST OF BREXIT REPORT TREASURY CAN PREDICT FUTURE TO 2030, CAN’T WORK OUT COST OF BREXIT REPORT
NAZ SHAH EMPLOYED “ZIO”-HATER AS TAXPAYER-FUNDED AIDE NAZ SHAH EMPLOYED “ZIO”-HATER AS TAXPAYER-FUNDED AIDE
NAZ SHAH RUNS CHARITY WITH ANTI-SEMITIC LABOUR COUNCILLOR NAZ SHAH RUNS CHARITY WITH ANTI-SEMITIC LABOUR COUNCILLOR
FRANK FIELD’S LEFT-WING CASE FOR BREXIT FRANK FIELD’S LEFT-WING CASE FOR BREXIT
NAZ SHAH COMPARED ISRAELIS TO HITLER NAZ SHAH COMPARED ISRAELIS TO HITLER
FREE ADVERTISING WORTH £135,000-A-WEEK FOR REMAIN CAMPAIGN FREE ADVERTISING WORTH £135,000-A-WEEK FOR REMAIN CAMPAIGN
NAZ SHAH RESIGNS AS JOHN MCDONNELL’S PPS NAZ SHAH RESIGNS AS JOHN MCDONNELL’S PPS
BBC DID REVEAL HILLSBOROUGH VERDICT YESTERDAY BBC DID REVEAL HILLSBOROUGH VERDICT YESTERDAY
NAZ SHAH: “THE JEWS ARE RALLYING” NAZ SHAH: “THE JEWS ARE RALLYING”
JUNIOR DOCTORS: IT’S ALL ABOUT THE MONEY JUNIOR DOCTORS: IT’S ALL ABOUT THE MONEY
Labour MP: Israelis Should Face “Transportation” Out of Middle East Labour MP: Israelis Should Face “Transportation” Out of Middle East
Welsh UKIP’s Hunky Firemen Actually Come From Spain Welsh UKIP’s Hunky Firemen Actually Come From Spain
Julia Hartley-Brewer v George Galloway Julia Hartley-Brewer v George Galloway
Blundering BBC Broadcast Hillsborough Verdict Blundering BBC Broadcast Hillsborough Verdict
Happy Meal? Watson’s McDonald’s Summit With Key Anti-Corbyn Plotter Happy Meal? Watson’s McDonald’s Summit With Key Anti-Corbyn Plotter
T-May Blasts “Nonsense” Remain Scaremongering T-May Blasts “Nonsense” Remain Scaremongering
Is it Really Racist to Call Obama Kenyan-American? Is it Really Racist to Call Obama Kenyan-American?
EXCLUSIVE: Corbyn’s Inheritance Set Aside For CND EXCLUSIVE: Corbyn’s Inheritance Set Aside For CND
QUESTION TIME AUDIENCE MEMBER SOLVES NATIONAL DEBT QUESTION TIME AUDIENCE MEMBER SOLVES NATIONAL DEBT
JASON COWLEY V TOM BALDWIN JASON COWLEY V TOM BALDWIN