December 15th, 2013

Read Guido’s Column in The Sun on Sunday Online

Save yourself a trip to the newsagents by subscribing to Sun+ and reading Guido’s column online. Don’t miss out on:

  • Hubby of Danish PM Helle and “Red Prince” Stephen Kinnock is sniffing around a Welsh seat
  • Peter Bone’s financial failure
  • Chuka’s racy poolside “50 Shades Of Grey” session with a mystery ladyfriend
  • PLP Xmas party had more karaoke wannabes than The X-Factor
  • Dim sum in Downing Street
  • MP John Hayes’ litter lout shame
  • Loony Labour candidate defends North Korea and attacks British troops in Afghanistan

Just 70p in the shops or just £1 a month to subscribe online


  1. 1
    The Mandellator says:

    I’ll be back.

    • 3
      The BBC speaks to the nation says:

      For those of you already missing the BBC’s extensive coverage we shall be back on air at 6.40pm on BBC Two for a program of recorded highlights of “The Day that changed the World “

      • 8
        Viewer says:

        Is it over yet. I’m getting fed up with Pricedrop.

      • 13
        Jingle bells says:

        Just like to thank the Mandela/bBBC broadcasting and Mandela/Sky tv for allowing me NOT to have tv on all week and help me to find other ways of enjoying my time.

      • 24
        The British media are cunts says:

        The day that changed the world? Would that be the day someone bought in to the BBC Cocaine laced with rat poison then?

      • 54
        BBC 24-Hour Rolling Crap says:

        ===== Breaking News =====

        To enable the country to express even more joy for the world’s most respected broadcaster, the noble Lord Patten has kindly agreed to a 100% increase in the TV Licence Fee, which henceforth will be known as the BBC’s Nelson Mandela Rainbow Fund of Joy.

      • 146



        • 216
          Mine d'Boggles says:

          Caps lock is on the left: a little up-arrow points to it. Just a helpful thought on a rainy Sunday afternoon.



      • 392
        thy wee is thy poison says:

        up Oz, the greasy fingers of the Tin man look wooden. As wee flies like a lumpen gheese hither the vul va opens and Ha l enters inquiring about ladies well being. THe answer was no but the gheese took no for an answer and the ghee flew.

    • 5
      I hate socialists. says:

      Thank goodness Mandela is in the ground,now we can get back to normal.
      The TV coverage has been way over the top .After all Mandela and the ANC
      were terrorists and South Africa is in a worst state now with murder and
      corruption the norm .

      • 9
        BBC Gardener's World says:

        And after the break, we’ll be showing how to plant your very own Mandela memorial garden on your balcony using only a recycled tyre and a sack of horse manure.

      • 12
        Pass the sickbag. says:

        I cannot understand the utter crap that the BBC have been spouting over Mandela.

        • 14
          proud to be a pikey says:

          What precautions have been taken against grave robbers ?
          I am interested to extend my library collection of well known person’s DNA for my experimental purposes.

          • My next door neighbour's brother's sister almost met Nelson says:

            Jimmy himself was buried with the same reverence. can we await further developments? Has Mr Thompson read any reports?

        • 29
          ANC -> communist says:

          Mandela, whether card carrying member of the communist or not, fully embraced them. Maybe he had no where else to go. From 1945 into the eighties they were a clear ever ready soviet military force awaiting orders. The ANC communist existed to follow orders.

          It was only when he distanced himself from the communists, maybe a coincidence, did white SA etc opened the door for majority rule.

          Mandela put his own politics before “winds of change”

          As more people move from rural villages into urban areas SA problems will mount. It happens with every country, every people, and creates big problems.

          • brown-dog says:

            If Mandela was a communist, why didn’t he nationalise the means of production in SA when in power.

            Maybe he was just a “plastic communist” to fool the likes of you.

          • I hate socialists. says:

            I wonder how long it will be before we have Saint Robert Mugabe .
            Another fine specimen of the human race.

          • Maq­­boul says:

            Perhaps because “means of production” means fuck all.

          • Never believe anything you find on Google (or anywhere else on-line) says:

            What about the role of Haile Selassie in training “freedom fighters” from across Africa until he was overthrown by “? freedom fighters”.

        • 42
          Common Purpose says:

          Six months re-education for you

        • 236
          TooThickToShovelShit says:

          Neither can anybody else outside a self-referential, mutually congratulatory bunch of parasitical, metropolitan arse pokers.

    • 21
      Toxic Labour for Spongers, Parasites, Immingrants and Criminals says:

      Sooner than you think when you’re family dig you up to cash in on visiting fees!

    • 64
      Fishy says:

      I hope that you all realise that we’re going to have to live through this all again when the BBC have their review of 2013 show on New Year’s Eve

      • 78
        The most amusing claim ever says:

        That’s two-thirds of the program content sorted then

      • 80
        BBC Blue Peter says:

        On tomorrows programme, we’re going to make a Nelson Mandela funeral kit that you can give you mum and dad for Xmas.

        To make the kit you will need a matchbox (keep the matches for later), some sticky-back plastic, a Daddies Sauce bottle (brown sauce if you can), a tyre from your sister’s bike, and one of her dolls (if you are a girl, use your brother’s bike and one of his dolls – dolls now being a multi-sexual expression of capitalist existentialism).

        You will also need a camera so you can send us a ‘selfi’. There is a competition and the winner of best picture will be invited to an all expenses paid trip to the Blue Peter studio. Send your entries to Mr J Savile here at New Broadcasting House. The age limit for entries is 12 for boys, 15 for girls.

      • 239
        TooThickToShovelShit says:

        Well, that’s something to look forward to.

    • 107
      Bill d'Sarse says:

      Goodbye to my dear, dear friend Nelson Mandela.
      By ‘dear, dear friend’ I actually mean friend.
      By ‘friend’, I actually mean I met him, once.
      By ‘met him’, I really meant I saw him once, from afar.
      By I saw him once; I really meant to say saw a picture of him.
      By ‘picture’ I really meant I once saw someone wearing a t-shirt with his picture on.
      Well, it could have been him.
      Goodbye to my dear, dear friend Nelson Mandela.
      From your closest buddy, Gree Four.

      • 156



    • 231
      Ed is gagging for it says:
    • 243
      mei hang ga says:

      meihenga price.
      cha rum me strict dance.
      dance with wolves better than sex.

    • 285
      Anonymous says:

      Canada is massive

      • 311
        Statement of Intent from George Obsorne says:

        We must protect Britain from being infiltrated by the marxists who are seeking to destroy our beloved capitalist sysytem which provides so many benefits to so few.

        (noises of George on his hands and knees servicing the leader of the Chinese communist party with his mouth and hands, but mainly his mouth. After he had finished him off he then polished the leader’s shoes and collected his suits from the laundry).

        • 450
          Thick as sh*t lefty says:

          ‘capitalist system’?

          You are either drunk or a dunce. Invest in a dictionary and look up the word corporatist, it may help, though in your case, I doubt it.

    • 455
      Left Winger says:

      If you have been stupid to work for as long as possible and pay your taxes and N.I. and also be stupid enough to put a little money aside each month for your old age, you really are a Pratt, because if there comes a time when you need help from the state,due to ill health they will say no, you cant work but you have some money in the bank, it doesn’t matter that you have paid in for decades you get nothing.
      A good analogy would be winning the lottery going to the office to collect the money and find that they have looked at your finances and say you have got enough money so we aren’t going to pay out.
      It seems that paying in counts for nothing, but if you are a scumbag with multiple kids from multiple , unknown fathers you are fawned upon and provided with all your needs (alcohol, fags etc.) .
      It’s a great system no wonder the country is on its backside.

  2. 2
    Rupe, down to his last few bucks says:

    Sorry guys, I have to overcharge for this shit. Wendi is gong to take me to the cleaners.

  3. 4
    • 11
      Taxpayer says:

      If they don’t like , they can quit

      • 16
        proud to be a pikey says:

        yes well, they should perhaps be made aware that properly creatives do not give a monkey’s fart what the surroundings are because everything is coming from the magical world of make believe.

        • 32
          The BBC says:

          That’s OK for the fantasists in the newsroom and Question Time team, but the guys who make all the pointless adverts between programmes about how great the BBC;s output is need somewhere to lounge about in luxury. It’s hard work making a silk purse out of a sow’s ear.

          • UKIP or bust says:

            I hear the BBC is to show something called Dr Who.

            Aparently, along with someone called Mandela, it’s what everybody wants 24 hours a day.

            Can’t say I’m interested my self.

          • Arthur stole our christmas club money says:

            I would think that “Eastenders” and the repeats on both BBC One and BBC Three probably exceed Dr Who broadcasts on a weekly/annual basis




          • Psyche the Dog says:

            Art. You evidently haven’t watched Murdoch owned Freeview channels then, repeats from the Beeb, ITV, ch4 etc repeated and repeated

          • BBC Head of Internal Adverts says:

            Hey, I deserve my 6-figure salary, I work a full 2 day week producing these adverts, as do my five deputies and their 200 staff.

  4. 10
    Grand Master, Grand Lodge, Great Queen street says:

    Handy, I thought your boys were dealing with these people placing derogatory comments in the local News? It is bringing the Brotherhood in to disrepute, we do not want the general unwashed to really know what we are up to. Fix it please. Jahbulon.

    • 18
      Handycock whipping it out says:

      Sorry your right Worshipful but I have been a bit occupied with the High Court hearing tomorrow, Monday 16 Dec. I am going to make a large settlement offer to the Trollope who has falsely accused me of sexually assaulting her, my Lawyers are hoping they can persuade her to accept a gagging clause as well. If all goes as planned, I will be out of the country for long periods to try and get my stamina back, and recover my legal costs through MP’s expenses. Thanks for your support and thank the boys that you fixed on my behalf in Hampshire Constabulary. Boaz.

      • 22
        Katya says:

        Vladimir and I send our best wishes Handy and good luck with the Court case tomorrow. Love you my Teddy Bear, see you in St Petersburg soon.

        • 45
          the court of the crimson king says:

          Oi, handycock, your sort’s days are fucking numbered pal

          • Someone says:

            Only if you and people like you are prepared to act rather than just complain. For evil to triumph etc…

          • Jacqui says:

            I have been married to Handy for 46 years and many people tell me that I am a bit thick for not sussing what is really going on. Handy tells me that these people are his political opponents who make up these stories about him for political advantage, he has sworn he has never been unfaithful to me and I believe him. He actually works for the British Intelligence and all this nonsense about his Russian mistress Katya is just the jealous Russians trying to make mischief. In any case, if he did not work for the British Intelligence Service, how did he come by the money to buy our villa in Spain, his MP’s pay certainly would not have bought it? When we first met I was a Seamstress for Spirella Corsets and Handy was a Fitter and Turner at Evans Engineers. We got married and Handy quickly went in to politics as a local Councillor. Since then he has been extremely successful both as a Councillor and MP. He has run planning in Portsmouth for decades and both our daughter and I became Councillors and both of us sat on the planning committee and I still do. People say planning in Portsmouth is corrupt but I can assure you it cannot be as most of the property developers drive Bentleys, Aston Martins etc so they must be successful businessmen and are very close friends of Handy’s. This current nonsense about Handy sexually molesting a vulnerable female constituent is nothing more than a local female chancer trying to make money out of him, Handy has told me this. Handy has told me that he is a pillar of integrity, morality and probity, and I firmly believe him. This country is in dire need of more politicians like Handy.

      • 28
        Centre Parting says:

        I thought the ‘gagging’ was part of the problem.

      • 167


        • 207
          Grand Master, Grand Lodge, Great Queen Street says:

          Handy I put out a special edict after the Savile scandal broke that all Brothers remove any reference to having worked for the BBC or any organisation that deals with vulnerable people from their CV’s. You removed these details from your online MP’s biography immediately, but even though I have told you about it, you still haven’t removed it from your Wikipedia entry:

          Please fix it pronto, it is all under the paragraph ‘early life.’ Jahbulon.

          • Handycock whipping it out says:

            I don’t know how to do it myself your Worshipful. I will get someone who does on the job tomorrow. Boaz.

          • Princess says:

            I have complained to the IPCC about this Pervert but hold out little hope of him being held to account.

  5. 15
    the super soaraway grauniad says:

    One up the bum, no harm done!

  6. 17
    P D O'Ring-File says:

    Who was in The Mail’s sights yesterday, Harman, Hodge, Hewitt, Dromey or other politicians or organisations.

    Haven’t yet had Harman standing with her family saying that she approved of older men running off with her boys to help them with their sex education homework.

    • 19
      Harriet Harperson says:

      I am an aristocrat. I don’t really care what you think.

      Incidentally, you also won’t find me commenting on segragated meetings at Universities, either, partly because I believe in segregated meetings on public property, having even organised and spoken at such segregated public meetings held by the Labour Party during the last general election campaign

      • 25
        P D O'Ring-File says:

        HH has tended to keep quiet about the extra-curricula activities of groups of men 20+ and teenage girls from care homes. Helping them with their sexual development or awareness in Rochdale, Rotherham, Oxford, High Wycombe amongst other places.

        • 33
          UKIP or bust says:

          I think you’ll find Harperson is on the side of women, after all it was her who organised all women shortlists for the Labour party.

          Although to be fair she never speaks up for the first women in history to become Prime Minister.

          • Harridan Harpic says:

            The definition of ‘woman’ will be changed to suit our Common Purpose.

          • Common Purpose says:

            Defining things is only a transitional stage while we pretend to have an interest in legality and the use of legal forms. Once in power, we will exercise revolutionary legal forms to deal with our opponents. The phrase is, ‘acting beyond authority’. This will normally involve a wall and machine gun.

          • a huperson says:

            Hattie doesn’t give a toss about women in general. She wants more rich well-connected women such as herself and her kind to be given free passes to public wealth and influence.

          • my keyboard's all sticky says:

            I would not change my Harriet for anything. For anything, no, but for a quick session with Santiago? Now you’re testing me.

    • 20
      the super soaraway grauniad says:

      There was an amusing piece on BBC Radio 4 the other day, a bunch of lefties foaming at the mouth over the fact that the Daily Mail and it’s globally successful website is actually read by real people, the usual sour grapes from a bunch of fucking losers. The sad part of the story is that they were trying to replicate the success of the Mail, but with a left leaning bias. Hahahahahahaha….

    • 34
    • 88
      Fishy says:

      Wasn’t there a little local difficulty in Hodge the Dodge’s patch when she was in local government?

      • 113
        M102 says:

        It was only a tiny tiny difficulty.

      • 125
        Anonymous says:

        A little bit more than a ” local difficulty”

        In the end she had to make a public apology in court for

        a. Trying to bismirch the charcters of the child involved and the whistle blower

        b. Doing nothing about it at the time when she was briefed

        When Bliar appointed her Children’s Minister is was described as a sick joke by the Social work Dept in Islington

        She is also married to a man called Hodge who was CE of the NACCL when it was defending the work of the PIE ( Harriet Harman was their legal advisor)

        The establishment looks after iteself otherwise she would be in jail

  7. 23
    The British media are cunts says:

    Has the fucking cuunt be buried yet? Is it safe to turn the TV on?

  8. 26
    Mandela Free Zone says:

    • 196
      The BBC says:

      Look, can you please stop posting things that are evocative of the beauty of Western culture.

      We’re trying to destroy Western culture you see, and that process is much easier if we can claim that it does not really exist and it is subservient to certain other cultures that invariably create blood-soaked subhuman shitholes wherever they take root.

      Thank you.

      PS – Pay your telly tax or else.

  9. 27
    UKIP or bust says:

    Scientists at the world centre for Mandela predict that the Mandela continuum could last into the next century.

    Computer generated models at the world centre for Mandela predict a rising Mandela effect to be felt well into the 22nd century a spokesperson for the institute reported today.

    Anthropomorphic Mandela Growth or AMG, is rising beyond all expectations, this has been proven beyond all doubt.

    Scientists at the BBC in collaboration with Channel four have met to put beyond doubt that the science is settled, and there will be rising Mandela coverage until it peaks sometime in 2130.

    A leading authority on Mandelaisation predicts that we could possibly never see normal programming on the BBC again.

    Jon Snow, a leading proponent of Mandelfest, says that “the world should wake up to the Mandela presence” and that “old fashioned (non Mandela) TV broadcasts are dangerous and lead to extreme right wing racist fascism”.

    • 58
      Anonymous says:

      I’ve just ignored it all mate, mainly by not watching any TV whatsoever and doing something more worthwhile. Job done.

    • 68
      Blue Peter Goldfish says:

      Dr Mandela, Eastmandelas, Football highlights ( featuring crowds tribute to Mandela), some old codger that once met Mandela, the news headlines; World pays tribute to Mandela, and now the weather forecast; hot and sunny today in S. Africa as crowds pay tribute to… what was his name again?.

    • 81
      BBC 24-Hour Rolling Crap says:

      ===== Breaking News =====

      A No 10 spokesperson has said that blogs must not publish comments from Mandela deniers. We must all follow the example of the LA Times

  10. 41
    M103 says:

    Lib Dems, beware Prof Pongoo, the penguin who got more votes than the Lib Dem candidate in the last Edinburgh local elections

  11. 43
    English for Beginners says:

    “MP John Hayes’ litter lout shame”

    MP John Hayes’s litter lout shame

  12. 47
    The cynic in me says:

    Chuka Umunna was on the television a while ago pointing out that the reason why the Chancellor is having to borrow £60 billion more than planned was due to three years of a flat-lining economy;I wonder if he might be in line for a promotion?

    • 51
      Someone says:

      Given the choice between a flat-lining economy and an economy which has tanked and is continuing to tank, I prefer the flat line, as long as in the meantime the structural issues are being dealt with. My criticism of the coalition is that I suspect that current growth is based on refuelling a housing bubble and that they have not dealt yet with government overspending on the EU and foreign aid and are still wasting vast sums on vanity projects and quangos.

    • 86
      The British media are cunts says:

      If the Tories had actually cut public spending 3 years ago (and ignored the shit stabbers at the BBC and Guardian) and also cut taxes we’d not be borrowing billions more and the economy would have taken off.

      Low taxes encourages inwards investment, the problem is none of the fucking drug taking mongs at Westminster can work that out.

  13. 49
    Owen Jones:My teenage sex shame says:

    I ruined countless pairs of socks wiping the spunk off my belly after a wank

  14. 50
    Steve in Fazakerley says:

    Electoral Calculus predicts the likelihood of a ConLib coalition as 3%, a LabLib coalition as 9% and a Labour majority as 79%, so the LibDems should go piss up a rope

    • 53
      Nicholarse Clegg says:

      Rubbish. I don’t give a shit what the electorate want; I will be deputy Prime Minister for ever and ever and ever.

      • 61
        Den Codd says:

        Speaking as a former Liberal voter I will never again vote for any LIberal party that includes Clegg, Cable or Beaker.


        • 72
          In there something in the water in Westminster? says:

          David Laws is another reason not to vote Libdem again – he stole, what? £50K? Just helped himself to it, and there he sits, today, not in prison where he belongs, but in the cabinet.

          Anyway, I agree – I can’t vote Libdem because of the aforementioned, I can’t vote Conservative (again) whilst the damn fool Cameron is in charge, and I can’t vote Labour (again) while Miliband, Harman and Balls are in charge.

          My choices are somewhat limited.

          • In there something in the water in Westminster? says:

            And Iain Duncan Smith. I forgot about him. Hell’s teeth, he’s about as much use as a bikini in Saudi Arabia.

            And Theresa May. In the name of all that’s Holy, why haven’t they got rid of her?

          • You'd be surprised says:

            Less. At beaches at Jeddha, Alhobar and Dammam women are allowed to wear bikinis.

          • Anonymous says:

            Despite David Laws’ expenses past, he has to be about the only Lib-Dem I’ve got time for. He should think about joining UKIP.

          • What this country needs is more arsebandits in positions of influence says:

            The thing about David is that, whatever job you give him, he’ll always make a good fist of it.

          • Banana Republican says:

            Give that man a hand !

        • 82
          Conservative central control says:

          If you have ever voted for a liberal your right to vote should be permanently withdrawn.
          On the grounds that you are most likely a muppet.

      • 175



        • 451
          Thick as sh*t lefty says:

          What part of ‘Lib-Dem’s will come fourth’ do you thicko types, not understand? The lazy old assumptions are over, the Lib Dem’s are finished.

          Try thinking for a change.

  15. 52
    Gobbledygook fan says:

    I’m going to miss those massively obese black women in silly hats being interviewed, offering their deep meaningful pearls of wisdom.

  16. 55
    Scamp the Excitable dog says:

    I can’t believe that the Liberals are supporting this right-wing government as much as they do. Cameron would not be out of place in some junta, he is cold, shows no mercy and is full of anger and hate.

    How liberals can sleep is beyond me. Clegg can only save his party by getting out now.

    • 57
      Cameron: star pupil at the Gordon Brown charm school? says:

      Cameron wouldn’t be out of place in a mental asylum.

    • 65
      There, fixed it for you says:

      I can’t believe that the Liberals are supporting this social democrat government as much as they do. Cameron would not be out of place in some parish council, he is lazy, shows no gumption and is fully distracted by angry birds and trivia.

      How liberals can sleep is beyond me. Clegg can only save his party by getting out now.

    • 66
      If you call pro EU pro gay marriage right wing says:

      This conservative government has adopted policies that even the most loony left 80′s council would have thought impossible to discuss.

      • 256
        TooThickToShovelShit says:

        Yes, quite right. Thirty years ago hardly anybody could conceive of homosexual “marriage” or adoption, not to mention all the other tripe that gets bandied about and legislated for these days. Now people who hold what was then a majority opinion (and there are probably more of them left than we are led to believe) are painted as swivel-eyed, reactionary, knuckle-dragging pond life soon to be consigned to the scrap heap of history. But then when was the last time we got the truth from tv or other media outlets?

    • 67
      Heil Cameron says:

      The real end game is this – A scorched earth policy from the Tories. They have not won an election since 1992 and they know they will not win the next one. Therefore they are attacking everything they have ever hated – Social Security, The NHS, Trade Unions, state education etc with an extreme virulence aimed at destroying their very fabric, to such an extent that whoever follows will struggle to restore them to functioning; something even remotely like they should. Whilst they and their friends in the 1% take the money and run whilst the vast majority continue to suffer as a result of their actions. It’s class war and they are beneath contempt

      • 76
        Sunderland is a Labour ghetto thats why its shyte says:

        Roll on!

      • 83
        There, fixed it for you says:

        The real end game is this – the scorched earth policy from the Parliamentary Labour Party has failed. They have not won an election since 2005, without massive voter fraud and gerrymandering and they know they will not win the next one. Therefore they are blindly attacking everything the coalition has protected and reformed – Social Security, The NHS, Trade Unions, state education etc with an extreme virulence aimed at distracting from their failures, to such an extent that whoever follows their incoherent rantings will struggle to find any policies capable of functioning; something even remotely making sense. Whilst they and their friends still in sinecures in the BBC take the money and run whilst the vast majority continue to be baffled about their behaviour. It’s pure self-serving kant and they are beneath contempt.

      • 172
        Monica says:

        The first two-thirds of that would be good. The latter third could be solved with an accurate historical reenactment of the demise of Spencer Perceval

    • 75
      That is the biggest joke of 2013 says:

      Cameron is neither right wing nor a Tory….How many times must you be told.

      If you think he is then you have absolutely no grasp of reality

      • 90
        brown-dog says:

        He is a libertarian and that is right-wing. The last of the state’s assets, the NHS, is now being privatised by stealth. His (and the rest of the LibLabCon’s) actions prove that they are right-wing libertarian.

        Judge them by their behaviours and not their rhetoric.

        • 197
          Ty Burns says:

          Cameron is a Common Purpose stooge, hell-bent on the destruction of the UK and all that it ever stood for.
          He should be hanged for treason.

          • What this country needs is more arsebandits in positions of influence says:

            Any chance of some drawing and quartering too?

            Or is that so last year in Dave’s metrosexual circle?

          • The Common Purpose stooge in no. 10 says:

            Who has time to sit while some twat draws a picture ?
            These days it’s the selfie that sells.


            [sticks gob in front of camera and pulls cheesy grin]

        • 452
          Thick as sh*t lefty says:

          ‘Libertain and right wing’

          If only he was, Cameron is a corporatist lefty. You should invest in a dictionary, you never know, even you may benefit from a little knowledge.

      • 465
        Are you 'avin' a giraffe? says:

        “He is a libertarian.” Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah! Oh, I’m sorry but…. Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!
        Please stop it, you’re killing me!

  17. 63
    libertarian says:

    Fuck off Carry Hole!

  18. 70
    Déjà vu......I think this is where we came in isn't it ?? says:

    Another coalition is very unlikely outcome…the parties, parliament and the country have had enough of coalitions to last a lifetime. Most people want either a Tory or Labour overall majority depending on their political views

    The Labour Party was certainly against ANY deal in 2010 and I can’t see that changing in 2015 and the Tory backbenchers won’t agree a second time. Many would prefer to go into opposition to get rid of Cameron.

    • 95
      brown-dog says:

      Déjà vu ideed.

      LibLabCon = more rapacious libertarianism…writ large.

      “Most people want either a Tory or Labour overall majority depending on their political views”

      WRONG! the GE turn-outs suggest that MOST people don’t want either.

      • 453
        Thick as sh*t lefty says:


        Your obvious inability to understand practically anything, is laid bare for everyone to see. The coalition is neither libertarian of right wing, it is a collection of Fabian socialist types, who imigine the world needs their insight and collectivist ideas.

    • 117
      Hughguv says:

      Odd, the electorate voted for a coalition but no individual voted for a coalition.

  19. 73
    BBC 24 Hr rolling bollocks says:

    And for the last time Nelson Mandela enters a deep damp hole.

  20. 74
    Sunderland is a Labour ghetto thats why its shyte says:

    Tje Mandela wankfest on the Marxist Broadcasting Corporation has reached its climax after 11 days of wall to wall coverage.Mandela maybe a brave man but he didnt warrnt this crap,God knows what it cost the licence fee payer.The real struggle in Suid Afrique will begin now and will expose the Mandela legacy for what it is a country on the verge of political and economic collapse,deeply divided and probably ending in a bloodbath,

    • 77
      The most amusing claim ever says:

      Makes a change from them banging on about cuts 24/7. Still back to normal next week

    • 92
      In there something in the water in Westminster? says:

      Perhaps the BBC did the right thing with all the coverage – Mandela was almost a miracle; a more or less decent African leader (providing one ignores the first 60 years of his life). I don’t think Africa’s had a decent leader before, and it perhaps won’t get one again.

      Fair’s fair – we don’t get many decent leaders here, either.

      • 96
        Oooh look over there says:

        And they kept the shameful pass to which the country has sunk off the air for 10+ days

        • 101
          In there something in the water in Westminster? says:

          I have to confess I haven’t seen any of the coverage, but the fact that Desmond Tutu’s house got burgled during the memorial service does speak volumes. Never mind the ‘sign translator’/lunatic who was able to stand next to Obama.

          • Thick as sh*t lefty says:

            Lunatics are the norm for Obumma. He’s as thick as shite and as dangerous as a gorilla with a hand grenade.

      • 104
        Bill Quango MP/7 says:

        I agree with your comment but the BBC did go overboard as they are always liable to do. Question time in a foreign country on issues that have no relevance to most people was worse than the Belfast QT show.
        Where we all have to pretend we are “one nation” even though we are not.

        I expect top bbc execs are hoping Castro turns his toes up soon.
        Be nice to go to Cuba in early February.

        • 185

          They probably have season tickets

        • 258
          TooThickToShovelShit says:

          Yeah, I’d forgotten about that bugger.

          Who would be after him, I wonder? Gerry Adams, probably, the Gandhi of West Belfast.

          • society in chaos says:

            probably, as the BBC employs most of Ireland and the rest are Scottish, or gay or both

      • 112
        Lord Stansted says:

        If the BBC had covered Mandela’s funeral in same manner as Thatcher’s funeral, I don’t think many would have objected. But they didn’t and they’ve ended up once again making fucking fools of themselves.

      • 116
        Non taxable pikey says:

        Seretse Khama.

    • 94
      Bill Quango MP/7 says:

      I hear that Strictly are planning a special Tribal dance off!
      It’s a sort of topless line dancing.

      But Brucie will be allowed to keep his vest on.

      And there’s a doctor Who special where the time lord helps a man escape from a long period of imprisonment.

    • 135
      Living in 98.221% white Merseyside says:

      It’ll follow Binns and Joplings into oblivion.

  21. 85
    Princess Diana says:

    I wished my funeral had been as well covered by the BBC as Mandela’s was.

    • 97
      HRH The Queen says:

      One hopes that one’s majestic funeral will be as well covered, too. But one suspects one will get a 20 second mention on CBeebies.

      • 108
        Bill Quango MP/7 says:

        Now now! The BBC, like most lefty organisations, is perfectly capable of holding contradictory views.
        They adore the monarchy. Absolutely adore them. It’s what made the state broadcaster a world player. Grand occasions.

        So although they do champagne toasts to a republic. Eat canapés to promote a more equal society and are always seeking ways to appear less white-rich- elitist than they are, the Queen will get , what is already being termed in media circles,
        The Full Mandela.

        • 121
          The BBC says:

          We will explore the journey of the Queen’s passing from an Afro-Caribbean perspective, reaching out and embracing their culture and exploring their many diverse memorial celebrations. Indeed, our coverage will be as much a celebration of this cultural identity as it will be a celebration of the Queen’s death.

          • Ancient seafarer says:

            The Beeb already have the precedent set by their appalling coverage of that River Thames rain-sodden thingy event a few months ago.

          • bergen says:

            Imagine if this had been North Korea and they’d produced that crap on a state occasion. Our prayers would have been answered.

    • 106
      UKIP or bust says:

      We’ve got Clinton and Obama’s to look forward to, to.

  22. 91
    Licence fee payer says:

    People I know who have never had an opinion either way about the BBC are now fed up with them.

    • 99
      Chris Patten says:

      They’re fed up? How do you think I feel? I am the real victim in all this. I ought to sue.

    • 165
      The BBC speaks to the nation BUT the nation has had enough says:

      The revealing thing is…the BBC don’t even understand why people are so critical of their coverage of the Mandelafest and cannot comprehend why people are complaining in vast numbers or taking the p*ss out of their broadcasts.

      They cannot accept that there is ANY other view but theirs

      • 180
        Reading and surfing says:

        They seem to treat every complaint as being “Why are you covering Mandela’s death” rather than “Why are you giving it so much airtime and filling it with platitudes and hyperbole?”.
        I’ve heard that he was the world’s greatest statesman of the last century from two different BBC spokepersons so far.
        Even if the field is narrowed to anti-honkey freedom-fighters, surely Gandhi was more influential, more iconic and more constant in avowals of non-violence.

        • 226
          BBC red Bottom says:

          Is Gandhi dead?
          Did we miss that?

          Bugger..Love India for a jolly! So much culture and enrichment and diversity and drugs. Its BBC heaven.

          • TooThickToShovelShit says:

            Sorry that you had to hear it here, but yes, I’m afraid it’s true. He went on so many fasts unto death that eventually a Nationalist poofter shot the bugger.

      • 191
        BBC Spokespersondaughter says:

        We are the world’s most respected broadcaster. So shut up little people and pay the TV tax – oh, I mean the Nelson Mandela Rainbow Fund of Joy..

  23. 98
    Just an observation says:

    Seeing as most of the SA army and police were still run by whites I’m not fucking surprised Mandela was full of forgiveness.
    However had the whites been less well armed who knows how vindictive the man may have become.

    • 109
      In there something in the water in Westminster? says:

      That’s an interesting point. During his imprisonment he might also have looked at what happened to all the other African countries that threw off white rule and realised there was a real danger he might be remembered as ‘father of a complete disaster area’ if he didn’t alter his vision a bit.

    • 166
      The Young Soldier says:

      The Salvation Army is based in South Africa !!!!

  24. 100
    sussex carol says:

    Another son of labour , kinnock, seeking a parliamentary seat. – straw ,kinnock, blair,

    Well at least they’re no longer keeping up the pretence that labour MP’s are representative of the working classes!

    • 114
      In there something in the water in Westminster? says:

      Just thought.. has the Kinnock sprog ever had a real job in the real world? A quick look reveals: No.

      “After attending (list of schools/colleges/universities), Stephen Kinnock worked as a research assistant at the European Parliament in Brussels before becoming a British Council Development and Training Services executive based in Brussels from 1997. He was promoted to become British Council’s Brussels Director in 2002.”

      What a surprise!

      • 119
        Sunderland is a Labour ghetto thats why its shyte says:

        This is the Labour Party the party of the horny handed toilers!

        • 127
          The Labour Party says:

          We’ll have you know, Ed Miliband worked very hard to be where he is today.

          Sitting eating his Sunday roast in a £2 million house that he didn’t buy with his own money.

      • 123
        Taxpayer says:

        Ah yes, the British Council. Another augean stable of political correctness, secret handshakes and nepotism in need of flushing out, if not shutting down entirely.

        • 163
          Spook says:

          Sorry, it’s a good cover even though everyone knows about it. Lots of cultural attaches. Every country does it.

          • Ancient seafarer says:

            Well then, pity we no longer have anything resembling “British culture”.

            PS: A culture is something nasty growing in a Petrie dish in the local lab.

      • 128
        The Kinnochio family says:

        Jobs just seem to sprout from Brussels.

      • 263
        TooThickToShovelShit says:

        Well, I doubt it, as far as I know the old man never did.

        How fares my noble Lord Kinnock by the way? Is he still troughing it for all he’s worth over in Brussels?

        • 326
          TooThickToShovelShit says:

          On second thoughts, that should have been “troughing it for all we’re worth”.

          • Thick as sh*t lefty says:

            Kinnock is worth £12 million, his salary for the ten years he was a commissioner would have been £1.2 million. Where did the rest come from? Guess.

    • 120
      Technomist says:

      It is all much of a muchness. Back in the early 1980s I spent some time in Czechoslovakia and had the amusing experience of having to sit through a meeting with some Czech communists. When I asked them about how they dealt with transition issues in a country with only one political party, I was told that the solution was to make sure that young cadres were picked and groomed for promotion only if they came from good revolutionary families.

      • 131
        D. Fenestrate says:

        Other candidates were chucked out of the window.

        • 153
          God I hate Labour says:

          I don’t know whether it’s still there, but about 10 years ago there was a Museum of Communism in Prague. It had a mock-up of a communist supermarket (shelves mostly empty, little choice of products), and an interrogation room where dissidents were ‘questioned’ (drainage channels on the office floor for the blood to drain away).

          Apparently, to buy a car you had to join a waiting list of about 6 years, and during those years you’d be assessed as to how good a communist you were, and your boss would have to provide a reference stating you were a committed Lefty and not likely to use the new car to escape the socialist paradise.

          If it’s still there, Miliband should pay it a visit and get some policy ideas.

          • Technomist says:

            I still remember the last afternoon in the country, desperately trying to find something to spend my money on before I left. In the end I gave up and gave it all to a woman who I met at the border who was on her way back to Prague after being refused permission to cross into Germany.

            Still the beer was cheap.

          • God I hate Labour says:

            They had a fairly cheap beer when I was there called Staropramen. It was about 1p a litre there, it costs a fortune in Waitrose.

    • 160
      All socialists are hypocrites says:

      Nepotism has always been a tenet of the left

  25. 110
    Ed Milionairebland says:

    I have been rather ignored by my broadcaster of choice these last ten days.
    So let me just say this.


  26. 122
    Living in 98.221% white Merseyside says:


    Next thing we’ll know Uncle Ajem and his cronies will be telling all the newsagents in Brick Lane not to sell the Current Bun because bare boobs and bots are un-islam*c!


    • 130
      Fishy says:

      Don’t give him ideas

      • 227
        Ancient seafarer says:

        I suspect if Anjem tries that he will find his head in his hands to play with. Most muzzies are not really chronic islamoloonys and the menfolk like to look at healthy young well developed females the same as every other red blooded male.

        I do make exceptions of course or the likes of Tatchell, Owen and Mandybum etc.

    • 132
      I know what sexually-repressed religious nutters get up to says:

      Forget what he says, I bet there are some interesting images on Anjem’s hard drive.

    • 133
      I know what sexually-repressed religious nutters get up to says:

      Forget what he says, I bet there are some interesting images on Anjem’s hard dr*ve.

      (Note to mod: yes, yes, we know you got done for DD! Please stop reminding us!)

    • 209
      Sunderland is a Labour ghetto thats why its shyte says:

      The Sun is very popular in a little shop where Binns used to be.

  27. 134
    One Term Dave says:

    On each of the 12 days of Christmas I will be promising to crack down on immigration. And I promise to make it my New Year’s resolution.

    • 138
      In the name of God, GO! says:

      Just like you did last year?

      And the year before?

      And the year before that. And the year before that. And the year before that. And the year before that.

    • 148
      HM Her Majesty says:

      On the twelfth day of Christmas, my government gave to me.
      12 Bummers bumming
      11 Paper regulators regulating
      10 Lords-a-Fiddling
      9 Libor Fixings
      8 MPs-a-milking
      7 Syrians-a-Shooting
      6 Greeks-a-Loaning
      5 Pae-do Rings
      4 Co-op Banks
      3 French Riots
      2 Two-Faced Daves
      And Mandela never off TV.

  28. 136
    P l e b says:

    Before Mandela’s release whites killed blacks.
    After Mandela’s release blacks kill whites.

    That’s equality for you.

  29. 137
    Bollocks Broadcasting Corporation says:

    We have decided to replace our Chistmas schedule of repeats with repeats of Mandiba’s funeral.

  30. 140
    the BBC says:

    thank fuck that’s over, now let’s get back to the urgent issue of transvestite football league registration conundrums and generally all things about gay sex.

  31. 141
    libertarian says:

    There was an amusing piece on BBC Radio 4 the other day, a bunch of lefties foaming at the mouth over the fact that the Mаіl and it’s globally successful website is actually read by real people, the usual sour grapes from a bunch of fucking losers. The sad part of the story is that they were trying to replicate the success of the Mаіl, but with a left leaning bias. Hahahahahahaha….

  32. 162

    Was in Monaco yesterday. Today in Cannes. It is delightful weather and I really think that these parts should belong to the English.

    For a start Charles Grimaldi plundered Southampton in 1338 and used his loot to set up the Principality. Then it was the English who set up the Riviera. There are statues of Queen Victoria on virtually every street corner here.

    These lands are ours. We should avenge the Grimaldi debt with interest. Then we can leave the sub-continentals and eastern Europeans to keep things running under a watchful eye at home and enjoy a much warmer and more pleasant winter down here. High taxes at home, obviously (already in place). Low taxes here, in fact weren’t they supposed to be temporary anyway?

    • 173
      Mornington Crescent says:

      Ewww… Have to disagree with you there, dear Cat. A sunny place for shady people – white Range Rovers and blue loafers these days.

      Head west to Languedoc-Roussillon: rough’n’ready in parts and, for that reason, it’s still la vraie France.

      • 184
        s'cat watch says:

        I thought SC had given up travelogues on account of him sounding like a prick. I might be wrong though.

      • 233
        Ancient seafarer says:

        Agree with MC. Cannes has become a bit tacky over the past few years. Still, lots of very nice little villages a few miles inland away from the rag, tag and bobtails.

        • 276
          World Traveller says:

          “Cannes has become a bit tacky over the past few years”

          Hasn’t everywhere with our wonderful global mass transport and no proper borders?

          It’s not easy to find a civilised, rather than just a primitive, place now.
          It all started with the package tours in the 1960s.

      • 301

        Ah! MC. Understand what you are saying and do not disagree with your assessment right down to the white Range Rover, which I have just seen (true!) on my visit to my mother, who is now in a rest home.

        I have a purpose in being here as I am selling her flat which she no longer needs.

        However, there is a reason why this place should be favoured and that is that the climate is so kind. My father used to say that the air was kind and he was quite right.

        Do like Languedoc-Roussillon as well. But my thoughts were to kick out the undesirables here, whether British, French, Algerian or whatever and reaffirm our sovereign rights with a decent set of people. They would have to speak English too, naturally.

        For me, the Adriatic east coast has some of the best unspoiled littoral to be found outside of Greece in this part of the world.

        • 329
          Mornington Crescent says:

          Very true, Cat. Excellent nudie beaches, too – although, as you say, the views are not great at 16 deg.

          • jacob says:

            Fucking perv with binoculars, eh?

          • The English get curiously prurient over the nude body. They resent the fact that they are fascinated in looking at a nice body of the opposite sex. I am quite sure I am. That happens each way. The idea of needing binoculars is risible as one is often allowed inside the other’s personal space where the possession of binoculars would be a bloody hindrance. You are right next to it all.

            Let me make clear that by personal space I am talking of the psychologist’s definition and not being actually inside the other person, pleasant a thought as that might be.

            The degree of comfort you can mutually enjoy on this basis is surprisingly high especially to someone who is not used to such behaviour. The issue is how you deport yourself in such circumstances.

            This is not to say one may not enjoy the circumstance. Exactly the opposite, one should enjoy it as much as possible. If one takes the approach that you should not venture where you are not welcome, then anything which might happen from a pleasant conversation to almost anything else is surely acceptable between adults.

            The other thing I have taken away from this is that other people show you respect when you do not take things for granted. In their shoes (metaphorically in view of no clothes!), you would feel exactly the same. It is not difficult.

    • 206
      Sunderland is a Labour ghetto thats why its shyte says:

      Hi Ho silver lining Cat,Monte Carlo or bust.

  33. 174
    I'd like to kick 50 shades of shit out of him says:

    Please, I didn’t need the mental image of Chucky having sexual frolics with some political groupie bitch. The man’s such an oily narcissist, he probably thinks about himself when he wants to climax.

  34. 177



  35. 178
    I'd like to kick 50 shades of shit out of him says:

    Chucky: the comedy gift that keeps on giving. Someone should tell the jumped up shit he’s never going to become Prime Minister despite his self-aggrandising fantasies he has about himself.

    • 235
      Ancient seafarer says:

      It would also be quite lovely of the morons in Streatham voted for somebody else – then he would have to go out and find a real job.

      • 414
        Anonymous says:

        My my worry is some bell-end at some think-think would appoint the fucker to some crony position.

  36. 183
    Somebody Had To Do The Obvious Joke Here says:

    “•Dim sum in Downing Street”

    Maybe dim sum in Downing St, but more than just some are dim in Westminster as a whole (or should that be “Westminster IS a hole”?).

    • 189
      R. Youshore says:

      That’s a joke ?

      • 260
        Tay King-dePisse says:

        Well, it’s in the form of a joke, anyway.
        Sadly, it’s too true to be funny.
        It’s Westminster which IS the joke, and they’re the last ones to “get it.”
        (Besides all the “Low-Info Joes” out there who keep electing them.)

  37. 187
    society in chaos says:

    well I was in the lap dancing bar last night and I can report that the girls have got a little bit older from my last visits but still gorgeous, the one thing that seems to have changed is that now it is full of some sort of Russian, eastern European types with a lot of attitude.

    • 192
      society in chaos says:

      I am fond of saying that ” you have to look at things in the right time context”
      for example some people like to view the integration of other groups into an established group as some sort of cultural exchange, rather than what it is, which is the migration of animals.

      • 208
        society in chaos says:

        and another thing, the fucking internet wants sorting out. I google for the word GROPUS and all the search engines say ” Oh, did you mean groups ?”, no I fucking didn’t mean “GROUPS” so don’t waste squillions of fucking data electrons telling me about yahoo fucking groups.
        I remember when I put a search into some sort of a browser and got 2 responses and when I clicked on one of them a message appeared saying” do fuck off” and crashed my windows computer.

    • 204
      UKIP or bust says:

      I remember in the 1970s when stripers started to appear in pubs on a Sunday lunch time, it was a bit of a laugh and sort of entertaining at first, soon there was a plethora of pubs with strippers night and day and not the sort of place I wanted to go into.

      Now, nearly all the pubs, with or without the strippers, have gone.

  38. 188
    Gideon says:

    Look we’ve had to make some Hard Choices’ which we f***** revelled in ‘ and we have to find another’ 179 Billion and that can only come from the Public,because we grew up hating them, we learnt from them on what Daddy called Zoo Tours,you know mini-bus trips round the rougher parts of Wiltshire;and then we had Martin Amis to sculpt out what all these Keith’s looked like.Odd thing is, he doesn’t like us either

  39. 190
    Do I detect the evil hand of Crosby here? says:

    An article in The Independent claims the Conservatives are instructing their candidates for 2014 local elections to distribute a Conservative brochure pack amongst schools & colleges:

    This seems wrong to me, no political party should be allowed to distribute anything remotely resembling propaganda to schools & colleges.
    State propaganda forced upon schools is usually associated with dictatorships & other unpleasant regimes. Surely Britain is better than that?

    • 198
      UKIP or bust says:

      Most schools and universitys start from a default position of left wing to marxist bias, distributing right wing imfromation could be seen as providing some balance in the education system.

      • 271
        Owen's Director of Learning for the Mentally Challenged says:

        For that reason, Tory junk will be binned and each replaced by ten Labour ones. Thin edge.
        No excuse me, I’ve got 40-page plan to prepare for the School Assembley on Madiba tomorrow morning.

    • 219
      UKIP, the finale solution says:

      Not that they are desperate for new members now after chasing their old ones away to UKIP.

      They will be chasing after a group that would rather stick pins in their eyes than vote Tory, still needs must eh?

      • 273
        Butch Dave says:

        If we ensure that all our policies will appeal to the leadership of the NUT we’ll make progress.

  40. 193
    John Ruskin says:

    There is no wealth, but life.” Only in ‘living’ is a wealth gained, not a fiscal wealth, but one of understanding and wisdom. If you make money the only tutor in your life, you will learn nothing and gain nothing, even when your own actions invite life itself to teach: you will not graduate in the university of life. You will remain utterly soulless, callous, and empty of humanity.

  41. 195
    Just wondering says:

    Which is more dead?

    1. Nelson Mandela

    2. Cameron’s Big Society

  42. 199
    Tachybaptus says:

    All the benefits of a well run government for the majority has now been transferred via trickle up to the corporate private state for their benefit and their non capitalistic fixed economy.

    All the money that government earned in Utilities,Transport,Social Care,Housing etc etc etc has been carpetbagged via Chicago School Freedmanite “Shock Doctrine”
    A theft aided and abetted by Ding Dong and the Tory flag wavers, who are willing to sell the family silver to any Johnny Foreigner as long as its not to the British middle and working classes !!

    They are traitors and should be treat as such !!!!

    • 203
      Sunderland is a Labour ghetto thats why its shyte says:


      • 213
        Tachybaptus says:

        We have the dogmatist Tories selling off the state owned east-coast rail services, which are the only rail service outside of the London underground, making a surplus. i.e. profit.

        They sold off Gas and Electricity and Rail and Council housing, amongst other things we all paid for over decades, all at cut-price.

        And what a wonderful result we got for that bargain, worse services, lower wages and higher prices.

        Since the newspapers are largely owned by those who benefit from “small government”, it is hardly surprising that most of the mess is blamed on anything, but privatisation…

      • 215
        society in chaos says:

        no. I think he states a reasonable view of what might be afoot.
        A few dynasties controlling the necessary production for the means of life.
        Nestle bought Evian because of thinking that water was about to be a valuable commodity. This is the globalization of Capital and the globalization / porridgification of the fodder of Capitalism which is the animals that do the production.

        • 218
          society in chaos says:

          but their plans will come undone because Nationalism is the strongest idea next to family ( between a man and a woman )

          • Podiceps says:

            But it is precisely the mission of the present government to destroy both nationalism and the family — of course, continuing the policies of the previous government.

  43. 201
    RomaBob... says:

    Beeb keep suggesting that Nelson Mandela is a modern day Jesus Christ……. totally lost the plot now!!

    • 255
      David Battenburg's inconvenient track record says:

      The BBC will keep digging up Mandella forever and a day to see if he’s made a miraculous recovery yet.
      Actually, on second thoughts, it’s highly likely that they’ll fake his resurrection sooner rather than later.

      • 459
        Thick as sh*t lefty says:

        Why do the BBC et al, ignore the fact that Mandela was a convicted terrorist who NEVER renounced violence?

    • 268
      The British media are cunts says:

      More like the black Jimmy Savile.

  44. 205
    Mandela is the Nasty Saint says:
  45. 224
    Chineeze Govt says:

    ho! Today, honorlabel leader proclaim earth satellite as an integral part of the People’s Republic of China. USA and Russian claims invalid as we have first taake-a-weeigh on moon.

  46. 252
    Bringing home the bacon says:
    • 257
      Simone Rimmer says:

      You mean it now comes with extra trimmings ?

    • 261
      Hamspam Chowder says:

      You’ve just lost the mozzie vote.

    • 267
      Elsie says:

      And where is he going to put the wet teaspoon?

    • 270
      Tay King-dePisse says:

      You may have a problem in future with the Muzzie and vegetarian communities with that pic, Chuka.
      You may wish to speak to Baroness Warsi about how to finesse that sort of thing…sure, she’s not in your Party, but she’s certainly an “ethnic” phoney in it just for the perks, like a certain gentleman we could name, but won’t.

    • 272
      TooThickToShovelShit says:

      Well that lot ought to kill him fairly quickly.

    • 274
      Elsie says:

      ” have yuh ‘ad yu beans love”

    • 279
      It's a ponce's breakfast says:

      You should get the tea as the meal is coming, and certainly not at the same time as a cold orange juice — unless it’s only for a photo op, of course.

      Waiddaminute … Orange juice with a trad. Eng. breakfast fry-up?

      And what’s that triangular thing? Some yankee breakfast item?

      • 287
        Wet and warm says:

        That sausage has seen better days.

      • 315
        They have "proper fryied breakfasts" north of Watford says:

        Forget the poncy metropolitan orange juice… Two slices Fried Bread beats Hash Browns any day and they’re a bit bit stingy on skinny chipolata style sausages and only one fried egg and where’s the baked beans ??

    • 289
      The British media are cunts says:

      Hope the bacon was Halal

    • 304
      Podiceps says:

      When I read ‘before my surgery’, for a moment I thought they might be cutting bits off him. But then I realised what he meant and my hopes were dashed.

    • 312
      anjem choudary says:

      Ummuna is not a true muslim.

    • 334
      No HP Sauce and No Tomato sauce. says:

      That’s a Southern Poofter’s breakfast that is. No Black pudding, fried bread or beans. And what the fuck is a battered sanitary towel doing on it?

  47. 254
    society in chaos says:

    OH My God, don’t tell me the gay Globalists are running the country

  48. 265
    BBC Programmimg says:

    Just to let you know that the coverage of Bruce Forsyth’s death will be coming from every corner of the globe and will include biopics of every ” celebrity” he has shook hands with.

    • 275
      Lorraine Chase's Nice says:

      I can remember a time when they used to talk proper on the Beeb.
      All you get these days is Esthery English, innit ?

  49. 269
    society in chaos says:

    and in other news; Bristol City Council has started twinning agreements with the capital of whichever country that was that just legalized pot

    • 277
      society in chaos says:

      as the hours unfold it looks now like a stampede of officials from all the borough councils to secure fact finding missions to whichever country that was that just legalized pot

  50. 288
    The British media are cunts says:

    Starting to wish Mongdela was still alive. Fuck knows what the BBC will be like when Scargill finally fucking dies.

  51. 291
    B Boyd says:

    On the tenth day Mandella will rise again – just in time to hear the Queen deliver her traditional Mandellamas message.

  52. 293
    Someone, Somewhere, on the web says:

    Mandela may well have affected the lives of everyone he met; but then so did Jimmy Saville, Stuart Hall and the rest of the BBC paedos…..

  53. 295
    The Most Useless political Video Ever. says:

  54. 296
    Prime Minister David Cameron says:

    BREAK:Actor Peter O’Toole, who shot to fame in the Oscar-winning epic Lawrence of Arabia, has died aged 81.

    • 299
      Larry the Cat says:


      Wonder what’s going on in the world ?
      Nothing new, by the look of it.

      [curls up again in front of fire]

      • 362
        Podiceps says:

        Strangely, his last two films were about St Catherine (Katherine of Alexandria) and the Virgin Mary (Mary). I don’t think he would have expected to go out on a blast of religion.

  55. 298
    Film Fan says:

    Its just come over airwaves that Peter O’toole aged 81 of Lawrence of
    Arabia fame has died…..

    rest in peace….

    • 300
      THE BBC says:

      Fucking Brill. O’Toole was the star of Zulu and the Zulus danced for Mandela….We can drag our Mandelathon out right up to Christmas and show Zulu straight after the Queen’s speech.

      • 303
        Podiceps says:

        Of course they’ll have to leave all the fighting out of Zulu in the interests of interracial harmony. The edited film will be a tidy 18 minutes long.

      • 309
        The BBC get their facts wrong yet again says:

        O’Toole was never in Zulu..that was Stanley Baker and Michael Caine and Jack Hawkins. O’Toole was in the prequel(filmed after original film)Zulu DAWN alongside Burt Lancaster and Simon Ward

      • 314
        Tinsel town fag says:

        He wasn’t in Zulu. He was in Zulu Dawn. Which is a poor film. Lefty written dialogue. All the whites are racist killers or snobbish officers. Barely a true event in the entire movie.
        Lord Chelmsford, O’Toole’s role is treated particularly badly.
        Still , that’s Hollywood.

      • 316
        Aqaba says:

        But in Lawrence of Arabia he killed a number of Turks at a time they were our enemies which is cetainly something the EU doesn’t want anyone to be reminded of.

        Here is a short excerpt for anyone who wants to consider this thorny issue:

  56. 305

    This must be the best joke of this century…………..

    “MPs will take compulsory ‘honesty training’ to learn the difference
    between right and wrong…………..”

    How will these mendacious manipulators ever be able to change there
    physicy its just not in the genes to be honest & will never be IMO

    Not certain if we should all laugh or cry……but something that will
    never happen, not in a billion years…..& of course they will require more
    money for all of the extra work involved.. LOL

    Full report on Mail online

    • 371
      Lets import proven politicians says:

      Here are some honest MPs,that is honest in real terms that when lobbied (bribed) stay lobbied

    • 439
      Lou Scannon says:

      Much better just to lock them up and throw away the key before they ever get to Westminster.

  57. 306

    TOSH !

  58. 308
    The BBC says:

    Viewers will be flocking to our BBC Schedules this evening:

    19:00 Strictly Come Dancing quarter final – Mandela Special. Contestants bid for a semi final place competing with their African tribal dance routines

    20:00 Time Team Special from South Africa – Time Team’s ground radar is used to excavate a recently discovered Grave in Qunu, South Africa

    21:00 Extended BBC News Special from South Africa

    23:30 The Big Film – ‘Captain Corelli’s Mandela’

    01:45 Question Time Mandela Special, starring the wonderful, irrepressible, freedom fighting, paragon of virtue, saviour of the nation and fabulous Labour politician, Peter Hain (repeat)

    02:45 Match of the Day 2 (a repeat of the 2010 World Cup Final and a surprise guest appearance will replace a round up of today’s matches and yesterday’s goals)

  59. 310
    David Minibanana says:


    • 330
      Joe Public & all Voting UKIP.ORG says:

      The new haircut for Comrade Ed is certainly an improvement hopefully
      this will have a profound effect on all electors nationwide……….lol

      Perhaps he will arrange for the treacherous Ed Boll*ox to be taken outside
      & put up against the wall as Comrade Ed completes his stranglehold of
      ZanuLieLabor as directed by the real power behind the loo Red Len…

  60. 313
    i don't n eed no doctor says:

    Mandela – Mandelson It’s all in the name – do you see?

    • 318
      Nissan Main Dealer says:

      Will all of our cost omers stop sending tributes. We are not dead.

    • 382
      sussex carol says:

      I agree that the beeb overdid it’s coverage of Mandela’s funeral. But he was a great man and I think your comparison of Mandela with the worthless mandelson is a shame to say the least!!

      • 399
        i don't n eed no doctor says:

        Nell, lighten up.

        • 464
          Thick as sh*t lefty says:

          Mandela a great man?

          He was a terrorist murderer.

          What part of that do you not understand?

          Great men do not murder innocent civillians or sing songs celebrating murdering innocent white people. Mandelson did both.

  61. 320
    Dave wants Turkish immigrants too says:

    If Tony Blair and Gordon Brown die within a day of each other the BBC and Labour will have a ‘cost of dying’ crisis.

  62. 332
    Legend RIP says:

    Peter O’Toole RIP.

    My condolences to his daughter, Plenty.

  63. 337
    Anonymous says:

    Lets cut the X factor crap. The scotch guy should ave gone weeks ago but the tribal scotch vote keeps him in. He will win tonight for the same reason.
    Not the best by far and always out of tune

    • 340
      The Judge Won says:

      The best singer was that pushy judge. She made them all sound like shite last night. But isn’t that sort of against the X factor spirit?

      • 342
        Fuck the LibLabCon says:

        Seriously, are you having this conversation?

        Turn the TV off and GET A FUCKING LIFE.

        • 344
          boo boo kittyfuck says:

          Bread and circuses, bread and circuses, just as valid now as in Roman times.

        • 349
          Anonymous says:

          Turn off the TV and get a life??? Huh?? Said by someone typing shite into a blog all night

  64. 341
    Sunderland is a Labour ghetto thats why its shyte says:

    BBC sSP of the year just started I wont be watching but I wonder how long it will be before they slip a mention of aMandela my moneys on carpet muncher Balding a direct descendant of ROBIN HOOD who stole from the rich to give to the poor,or in the case of the ANC stole from the rich to give to the black elite.

  65. 347
    Anonymous says:

    The BBC mandellafest would have been funnier if they interviewed joey from celebrity. Imagine the answers .

  66. 353
  67. 358
    Anonymous says:

    Sam might as well fuck off now she’s up against the scotch tribal vote.

  68. 360
    RED ED - SON OF BROWN says:


    • 370
      Anonymous says:

      Indeed they are they have been for a while. The problem is those scumbags at the BBC don’t report the above and fan the flames of a crisis in favour of Labour.

    • 440
      Lou Scannon says:

      So the rest of Europe is even more fucked than we are. No surprises there then.

      • 442
        A non emouse says:

        No. Fuel costs matter less in countries where people live in proper modern apartment blocks. In Britain where we still build 3r world style mud huts (Barrett style semis), poor insulation means heating bills are too important.

        • 443
          Lou Scannon says:

          Personally, I would absolutely hate to live in an apartment block.
          That apart, you may well be right.
          What I do know is that my Mum’s house, built circa 1960, was incredibly poorly insulated. I was astonished recently to find that there was no insulation whatsoever on the water pipes in the roof space.

        • 467
          FFS says:

          That really is a load of bollox. Whatever you might think of Barratt homes they are obliged to meet the very latest specs for energy efficiency. This is despite the fact that the temperature outside the home (heated inside to 21Celsius) rarely drops below -5Celsius (a temperature difference of 26degrees) whereas in Scandinavian countries and Germany it can regularly go down to -40Celsius (a temperature difference of 61Celsius).

          Frankly we don’t need insulation as good as Scandinavia or Germany…. but modern houses actually have insulation as good as Scandinavia or Germany.

          Not only is our energy cheaper – but we use significantly less energy too.

  69. 361
    ʍȫʊʂʂȁ ҞϴџṦṦậ says:

    Its a wonder the Pope does not excommunicate George Underpants Dummkopf Schmidt. He wants the poor returned to paupers, and the rich to be worshipped.

    Poor Dummkopf is that popular he now needs armed guards, even in the Houses of Parliament. How does he cope on the outside? Get chauffeured in a Chieftain tank? If he does it will be at the Tax Payers expense.

    • 365
      Dr Richard Lynn - Ulster University (Emeritus) - Personality and Individual Differences says:

      What size is yours?

  70. 363
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  71. 366
    Anonymous says:

    Agree with you about Mandela… but the Barnum & Baileys Circus (BBC) still managed to make this thug sound like the messiah!

    Read more:–Mandela-NOT-perfect.html#ixzz2na02Mq3D
    Follow us: @MailOnline on Twitter | DailyMail on Facebook

  72. 372
    Queue BBC EltonJohnathon week says:

    KinL is Elton John pissed or is he having a dizzy spell?

  73. 375
    ShitCom on Crap4 and endlessly repeated Bore 4 says:

    Taffy Kinnock can fuck off. 50 shades of bullshit that is Chukus your Suit can fuck off & die of Cancer!

    Labour are Bullshitters and nothing more than plague of leeches! U have 2 be thick to vote Labour. Ed doing a Selfy? Fuck off he is an UNION arselicker,money grubbing parasite!

    Labour are SCUM Balls and Profits of Doom!

    They make the Brainwashing, Bullshittineg Hunts ~BBC~ look like amateurs!

    Rant over- :)

  74. 376
    Anonymous says:

    Told you so scotch vote lost it

    Haha fuck you jocks

  75. 378
    Leftie Twitter twats says:

    I asked Tom Watson on Twitter why he’d been silent on Operation Ore. He blocked me. I asked Owen Jones, who’s said he opposes faith schools, if that means he opposes muslim faith schools. He blocked me. I asked Steve Rose, HuffPo writer who’s preoccupied with so-called Islamaphobia, what he thinks about Islamists who call for the execution of gays, women and J*ws. He blocked me.

    It’s funny. I thought these lefties were supposed to be courageous and fearless when it comes to debate. I asked them simple questions and all they could do was block me. Hilarious.

    • 380
      sussex carol says:

      Labour is a Closed Shop that does not believe in debate or freedom of expression. Hopefully you have now learned the lesson!!

    • 420
      Anonymous says:

      I would have thought that the boy wonder would be more likely to oppose the non-Muslim variety of faith schools.

  76. 379
    sussex carol says:

    Peter O’Toole who played TE Lawrence in Lawrence of Arabia has died. RIP. Lawrence of Arabia is probably to most influence film of all time.

  77. 384
    The Pork Sword of Justice says:

    The BBC just managed to introduce Mandela’s death into Sports Personality of the Year. The planks really are obsessed.

    • 390
      Obsessive Behaviour Syndrome infests the BBC says:

      Gues what. Pick of the week earlier only had one pick allowed. Began with M ended with a.

      • 394
        The Pork Sword of Justice says:

        Hilariously Andy Murray won Sports Personality of the Year.

        He is a great sportsman but personality???

    • 397
      i don't n eed no doctor says:

      There is something seriously wrong with the BBC.

  78. 385
    Anonymous says:

    Mandela wins X factor

  79. 386
    A Confused early Ed Miliband. circa 2009 says:

  80. 393
    Labour Voting Thickos says:

    The Labour Party is a MESS! They are a collective fuck up! Ballox Economics for a Union of Parsasites! Sort yourselves out! Saddos!

    Labour will never be in government until they become a credible opposition!

    • 405
      albacore says:

      Now, you really must be joking – they’re going great guns
      If Parliament were a bun fight, they’d have all the buns
      A Labour P M masquerading as a Tory
      Before Dave, that would have been just a fairy story
      On second thought, though, I might be stretching it a bit
      If Heath was a Tory, how can the E U be shit?

    • 419
      Anonymous says:

      I’m not so sure about your latter point, but I hope you’re fucking right.

  81. 403
    Nelson Mandela says:

    Oi! Oi ! Harris, Reed, O’Toole…Will you three shut the fuck up, I’m trying to get some sleep.

    • 407
      Richard Burton says:

      Quiet you. Or I’ll read some of that bloody awful Milkwod shite.
      Now . Last one to drain a bottle of scotch is a poof!

  82. 406
    The British media are cunts says:

    So the BBC are being found out once again for buying off their mates with big pay off’s

    Time for the BBC to be smashed into a million pieces.

  83. 411
    Harriet Dromey says:

    Children love PIE!

  84. 422

    Nelson Mandela: An opportunity to reflect on his legacy – BBC

    FFS! How long can they spin this one out for?

  85. 423
    See. He's a sodding World Government Marxist says:
    • 431
      TYS says:

      What did you really expect? Someone who believes in democracy? Someone who isn’t a meglomaniac?

  86. 424
    N@zi salutes from the Old Communist says:
  87. 427
    Adolph's Son is rude to Nigella's Dad says:

    • 433
      YouTube if you want to says:

      Tried watching this but gave up after 50 seconds. What a nauseous little creep he was then( and still is)

      • 435
        Creep is the word says:

        He’s an irritating cocky little sod isn’t he? I never noticed it back then (probably confused it for enthusiasm) but obviously the Unions did, they made a good choice for their wants.

  88. 434
    A British Taxpayer says:

    27 million pounds given as foreign aid to a nation which has just landed a robot on the moon. If he didn’t know about that, David cameron should make sure Justine Greening, who is supposed to know about it, is sacked. Immediately.

    If he did know, he should resign.

    • 437
      Dave has gotten in too deep with Chinese money for British Infrastructure says:

      Aid to China was discussed when Dave became PM, Dave is fully aware. Rumour has it Greening is not happy supporting Indian and Chinese space missions but the aid can only be wound down slowly. Me, I would simply just stop sending the dosh but Dave needs the Chinks onside to build his HS train and Nuclear power stations.

      • 462
        Bum Sex Dave says:


      • 470
        Old China Hand says:

        Then he should resign. This is a disgraceful way to run the public finances. He has been in office quite long enough to wind down any wasteful schemes.

        I have travelled extensively in China and have not met any Chinese person who felt the UK owed them anything by way of aid.

  89. 448
    Lying little toad says:

    Is it still iliband’s position that global warming is 100% man made as he stated in that clip?
    Someone needs to ask him.

  90. 461
    What a set of twats you moderators are says:


  91. 466
    Anonymous says:

    This country should never allow black, brown or yellow politicians into our political system.

Seen Elsewhere

Inside an Islamist Takeover Plot School | Newsnight
Ed Heads to Scotland | Sun
Assad’s New Chemical Weapon Attacks | National Review
Jason Groves New Mail Deputy Pol Ed | MediaGuido
Cocaine Conservatives | Standard
Jezza Browne Responds to LibDem Haters | LibDem Voice
Why Britain Needs to Leave the EU | Douglas Carswell
Who Tells Ed When He’s Wrong? | Speccie
Hands Off Our Cojones, Mr Clegg | Laura Perrins
London Live Averaging Just 2,400 Viewers | Forbes
Ed’s Constitutional Failure | ConHome

Guido-hot-button (1) Guido-hot-button (1)

Dan Hodges on Team Miliband:

“‘Poisonous’, was the picture painted by one former senior advisor. ‘Dysfunctional,’ said one shadow cabinet member. ‘A bunch of medieval courtiers, not an office,’ said another. The most positive description I could get was ‘It’s a work in progress. They’re learning. Slowly. But they are learning.’”

Nick Clegg says:

Do you want lies with that?

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