December 2nd, 2013

Cristal Meth Scandal

Nigel Evans was looking on the bright side when Guido bumped into him last week.

“Whenever I get down, I just think it could be worse. I could be Reverend Flowers.”

Although, unlike the party-loving former boss of the Co-op Bank, Evans told Guido: “I’ve never smoked crystal meth, mind. I have drunk Cristal, though”.


60 Comments

  1. 1
    Fist of Fury says:

    Did you get fisted Guido?

    Like

  2. 2
    new sex test needed says:

    Chap’s lying about his sexuality.

    Like

  3. 4
    Guido cures homosexuality says:

    Guido’s bumping into a raving poofter has cured him.

    Like

  4. 6
    Steve Miliband says:

    A lot of people going to be disappointed about the Tom Daley news today – another series of ‘Splash’

    Like

    • 9
      Aquatic Gayer says:

      I much prefer Flippa

      Like

    • 10
      David Hockney says:

      I think I’ll call it a Bigger Splash. Does that sound OK do you think?

      Like

    • 28
      Still rubbing noses in diversity says:

      ” another series of ‘Splash’ ”

      Now he’s outed himself you can be rest assured that the BBC will run at least another 5 series for him or indeed create a whole new repertoire of programmes just like they have for that dread-locked black bloke in the wheelchair.

      By coming out, Daley’s futurewill be set for life, with the aid of the BBC.

      Like

    • 34
      Barclay Twins wear tight speedo's says:

      Should not Daley be using the personal ads not the front page of the Telegraph.

      Like

    • 36
      Point of order says:

      Tom Daley gay….

      That’s a bit like bumping into an old mate at the pub who says, you know what I’ve come to the conclusion that Cameron is a fcuking liar and a fcuking cnut…

      Welcome to the club buddy..

      Like

  5. 8
    Observer says:

    Not often you see five tits together.

    Like

    • 60
      Godfrey Bloom says:

      And four of them look like a pair of nice ladies to me, definitely not sluts who don’t clean behind their fridges

      Like

  6. 12
    Spineless Dave says:

    mmm This blowfish is absolutely lovely.

    Like

  7. 14
    Ah!!!!!!!!!! M says:

    It’s about time Pattern undertakes the same surgery as Sharon Osbourne

    Like

  8. 16
  9. 19
    Dr Russell Brand Phd. says:

    Like

  10. 25
    Anon. says:

    The BBC are still turning a blind eye to this,can’t think why?

    Like

  11. 38
    Curiouser & Curiouser says:

    Lovely matching smiles. Have they all been sucking the same stick of Brighton rock?

    Like

  12. 39
    Do you want some.... says:

    I thought Evans was an uphill gardner….?

    Like

    • 45
      John Bellingham says:

      The difference is that Flowers paid money (from expenses?) to sodomise teenage boys. Evans is accused of doing the same thing, nit only not paying for it, but not even asking permission. However as there is a court case in progress such matters are sub judice–that’s Latin for “if we keep quiet about it maybe people will lose interest”

      Like

    • 54
      Sheep says:

      ….His nationality may go against him!

      Like

  13. 46
    UKIP voter says:

    Sooner he goes down down the safer for us all

    Like

  14. 55
    Stan Tistic says:

    He’s not going down anywhere near me.

    Like


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Dentists Have Last Laugh Over Sneering Keynes | FT
Why’s Clegg Giving Men Paternity Leave? | Conservative Women
Cam Cannot Stem EU Immigration | David Keighley
9 Mansion Tax Questions for Ed Balls | TPA
Politicians are Lying to You About Immigration | Alex Wickham
Give Journalists Public Interest Defence in Law | Guardian
Cameron is Going to Have to Deal With UKIP | Dan Hodges


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Chris Bryant talks to the Times Diary about a famous gay actor:

“I don’t think I’ve had sex with him. He says we had sex in Clapham. I’m fairly certain I’ve never had sex south of the river”



Progressive Inclusion Champion says:

Great to hear Carswell call for inclusive policies and that UKIP must stand for first and second generation immigrants as much as the English.


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