November 28th, 2013

Bercow: “No Shared Malice or Corruption” From Jailed MPs

Bercow was spinning hard for jailed MPs caught fiddling their expenses during his speech to the Hansard Society last night.

“The House appeared to be little more than a cross between a rubber stamp and a talking shop which had taken to collective activity such as the imaginative interpretation of what might be a legitimate expense claim as much as an odd form of displacement activity as out of any shared sense of malice or corruption.”

Jim Devine must have submitted claims for cleaning, maintenance and printing work that the judge said were “entirely bogus”, pleading guilty to dishonestly claiming £8,385, and been jailed for 16 months because he was bored.

David Chaytor’s three counts of false accounting worth £18,000, submitting claims for the rent of a flat in Westminster which he bought in 1999 and had paid off the mortgage for in 2003, seeing him sentenced to 18 months, must have been a “displacement activity”.

Certainly no malice or corruption from Elliot Morley submitting 19 claims for excessive mortgage payments and 21 second home allowance forms for a mortgage he had already paid off. Costing the taxpayer £32,000 and seeing him sentenced to 16 months.

And what of Eric Illsley, who made false claims for his second home worth £14,000 and was jailed for 14 months.

Let’s not forget Denis MacShane, awaiting sentencing after pleading guilty to false accounting. These MPs were not bored, they were crooks who were banged up for breaking the law…


191 Comments

  1. 1
    Dave Cameron says:

    Vote for me, I offer you more EU integration and mass unfettered immigration.

  2. 2
    Red Ed says:

    I can match that offer, vote for me.

  3. 3
    Tristram Clot says:

    I’M VERY CHEAP THEN.

  4. 4
    Forgive them for they know not what they are doing. says:

    They are politicians Guido and their definition of truth is not how we perceive the truth to be.

  5. 5
    Nick Clegg says:

    I’ll match both of those plus extra green taxes.

  6. 6
    Hansard reporter says:

    I have been at this job for over 30 years and we have never had to report a worse Speaker

    Even Mick Martin, who was very dodgy, did not plumb the depths of this man

  7. 7
    Calamity Clegg, Chief Cockroach says:

    Britain LibDems can do better than that !

  8. 8
    broderick crawford says:

    Quite right Gweeds

    Feed them all to a drove of famished porcines and then put what remains of their cranium outside tbeir front door with an IPSA form in their mouths .

  9. 9
    Silly Sally B13COW says:

    He doesn’t plumb the depths. He doesn’t even touch the sides.

  10. 10
    So True..And it is a disgrace. says:

    “The truths you can’t tell in today’s Britain”

    http://www.spectator.co.uk/features/9088381/you-cant-say-that/

    What I find sad is that Grieve’s accusers also know he was telling the truth. And that they still carried on to howl him down casts shame on all their ilk.

  11. 11
  12. 12
    Politicus says:

    Disgraceful. When legislators try to invent excuses for breaking the very laws they’re supposed to enact and uphold then they should meet exemplary punishment and sit in eternal shame.

  13. 13
    Politicus says:

    I won’t for UKIP because they just seem to be full of boring trolls who spam Guido’s comments

  14. 14
    Anonymous says:

    Hearing that sort of nit picking claim (like jackie Smiths 60p for a bath plug)tells you all you want to know really, out for every last penny, and not an attractive trait in anybody.

  15. 15
    DAVID CAMERON outgoing PM says:

    ” because he was bored.” You want to see bored John , look no further than your Sally !

  16. 16
    Ed Dafty, LimpDim MP, Climate Change Chieftain says:

    Remember Green Shield stamps ?

    The Liberal Dimocrats will give you Green Crap Tax :)

  17. 17
  18. 18
    how about says:

    Don’t forget former Luton Labour MP Margaret Moran who fiddled over £50k worth of expenses, including claiming for an imaginary boiler.

  19. 19
    Dynamic Dave says:

    This is all in the past. Concentrate instead on moving forward progressively into our equal opportunity multi cultural LGBT LibLabConner paradise.

  20. 20
  21. 21
    Phil from Pentonville says:

    Remember that Hazel Blears character too. Stanley Unwin must be her PR consultant.

    And then there was the guy with the wisteria in his chimney.

    I reckon a good brief in the CPS could get 20/30 of this lot locked up.

  22. 22
    Wacqui Jacqui says:

    Fuck me – I never knew Home Secretary was a boring, irrelevant job while I was “doing” it.

  23. 23
    Margaret Moran says:

    I’m so glad that I have been totally vindicated by the lack of mention.

    Coincidentally I’m starting to feel much better.

  24. 24
    Bercow must go Now. Except he can not be sacked says:

    So Denis MacShane was suffering from Boredom when he signed off fraudulent expenses under a false name?

  25. 25
    Forgive the BBC for they cannot recognise how socilaist their view of truth is says:

    Didn’t see this on the dear old Beeb this morning

    They are BBC staff Guido and their definition of truth is not how we perceive the truth to be.

    MPs and BBC in bed together. Only the public gets a good shafting

  26. 26
    A Plain Fag says:

    Hi Dave. Just wanted to say thanks, for looking out for us Plain Fags and not just the ones in loud lurex outfits.

  27. 27
    Too long too Fat says:

  28. 28
    Anonymous says:

    or Vaz with his silk cushions

  29. 29
    Call me Dave, future failure says:

    Too many tweets makes a fat t**t.

  30. 30
    Flippin Blears says:

    and don’t forget the cost of my Kit-Kat

  31. 31
  32. 32
    1987 - 2013 says:

    Abbott’s been out of work for 26 years? Talk about the long term un-employed.

  33. 33
    Fuck the EU says:

    There could be an element of truth in some of Bercow’s assertions, but the human condition of these MPs does not excuse their criminal actions.

  34. 34
  35. 35
    Postal Votes are Labour Loo Paper says:

    And she got away with it. She should have been banged up with the other troughing scum.

  36. 36
    Postal Votes are Labour Loo Paper says:

    Fuck off fatty

  37. 37
    Sage says:

    You can judge a man by the wife he keeps.

  38. 38
    Vote Tory get heir to Blair says:

    The profession with the biggest number of crooks per capita is politicians.

  39. 39
    Postal Votes are Labour Loo Paper says:

    Scumbags the lot of them. Theft is theft no matter how the little turd tries to spin it. It is people like him that have made people despise politicians as lower than vermin.

  40. 40
    Nige says:

    Or vote for me, same outcome

  41. 41
    Fabians are Evil says:

    Bercow must be a Fabian

  42. 42
    Popeye says:

    Are you forgetting the mucky movies?

  43. 43
    Henry paper shifter says:

    What’s wrong with submitting an accurate claim?

  44. 44
    Jazz Porridge says:

    +1

  45. 45
    That can be arranged says:

  46. 46
    The BBC causes very serious mental illness says:

    BBC wanking on again about wind turbines and UKs Carbon targets connected with Climate Change – a discredited agenda which doesn’t exist and which represents the largest fraud perpetrated in the name of science so far.

    Not to mention the fraud related to offshore Wind Turbine technology, which even by their own admission in the same Today show piece is known to not be able to meaningfully supply UK energy needs even if running at full tilt.

    No mention at all about the old wave generation technology. That was previously claimed to work, should be a lot cheaper, and perhaps a lot less intrusive on the skyline. Reliable as well (unless the moon goes on strike) – so what gives ?

    Corruption of VI’s, mainly the fraud Ed Davey and the criminal likes of Huhne and his vile ex wife perchance ?

    Scum the lot of them.

    Still, interesting to hear the BBC reporting on baby r’ape conviction with an attempted straight face as Savile’s yodels call from beyond his grave. B.A.U. for some.

    The BBC is a piece of shit EU propaganda organ: To save carbon, switch the thing off.

  47. 47
    Jazz Porridge says:

    This is disgusting.

    These MPs need an imaginative slapping.

  48. 48
    Margaret Moron says:

    But punishing my for my crimes would make me very saaaaad, and that would infringe my human right to be happy.

    Wibble.

  49. 49
    Jazz Porridge says:

    Stop giving interviews then you daft moo

  50. 50
    White Hat Geek says:

    She should buy a Guy Fawkes mask and start campaigning against S-cientology. Oh – and tweet less.

  51. 51
    HEARDITALLSEENITALLBEFORE says:

    And what about the current toughing PM, who imagined that it was right and proper that the taxpayer pay for his wisteria to be pruned?

  52. 52
    One armed bandit says:

    I must remember that next time I get done for blagging a bank.

    “Forgive me your honour, but I was bored. No malice or greed. What’s that you say your honour? Six months suspended? You’re a gent and make no mistake.

  53. 53
    Nick Clegg says:

    I thought he was one of snow whites dwarfs, dopey.

  54. 54
    Bercow's Choice says:

  55. 55
    Mong Watch says:

    When it is public money being spent the public have a right to know.

    Staples at less that 10p sounds like a good deal, and is a legitimate office expense. It sounds like he is claiming only for the staples used on his public duty rather than the entire box.

    Strictly that is precisely what all MPs should be doing, however it does betray perhaps a bit of OCD in this Hunt which perhaps should make him not so good as leadership material.

  56. 56
    One-term Dave (dragging the Tories to their grave) says:

    Oh you silly little fool! I know how to spend your money better than you do! By jove, silly little oiks like you would have wasted the money (rightfully mine) on mushy peas and lard and ice-creams for your horrid little fat children and other nasty disgusting things.

    Toodle pip!

  57. 57
    David Cameron's Arse Bandit says:

    The next time someone accuses me of r’ape I must say:

    “Forgive me your honour, but I was bored. No malice or grreed. What’s that you say your honour ? Six months suspended? You’re a gent and make no mistake. Oh – and he was gagging for it.”

  58. 58
    Hugh Janus says:

    Or Yeo with his pink laptop…

  59. 59
    The British media are cunts says:

    ALL LABOUR MP’s yet the BBC says nothing.

  60. 60
    Foghorn and Harrison. The Chuckle Bros says:

  61. 61
    Imaginative Corporal Beatings says:

    Perhaps with an irritated porcupine ?

  62. 62
    Anonymous says:

    To be honest it appears some of these UKIP trolls aren’t very well. We shouldn’t laugh.

  63. 63
    Living in 98.221% white Merseyside says:

    Unfettered immigration allows 2.2m Brits to live elsewhere in the EU.

    All this fuss about Bulgaria and Romania’s Roma minorities. I wonder how many Eastern European countries look at our huge “minorities” and think what would it be like if they suddenly decided to move there en masse?

  64. 64
    Knuckle Fairy on E Wing says:

    I’ll make sure them Members get banged to rights

  65. 65
    Anon says:

    Hmm. Does anyone know how to hotwire Bercow’s Land Rover Freelander? I’m bored and feel a little joyride (no pun intended) coming on.

  66. 66
    dai wondering says:

    is it ironic that in the case of MP’s corruption the regulatory investigation and prosecution systems actually worked?

    perhaps parliament should take heart from this when looking at corruption elsewhere (BBC & the financial sector for instance)

  67. 67
    HEARDITALLSEENITALLBEFORE says:

    Iam so VERY sorry I spoke out of turn sir really I am

  68. 68
    Veracity says:

    Nah, that don’t work. Doesn’t have the same ring of truth to it, does it malpa.

  69. 69
    Ma­qb­­oul says:

    I’m afraid even Gu­ido’s WankerWall technology can’t stop these tedious feckers getting through.

  70. 70
    retardEd Miliband says:

    You are thmearing uth!

  71. 71
    Fuck the EU says:

    Another great European export: Syphilis.

    Originally introduced into the human population through sexual activity with livestock, predominantly in France and other filthy continental European countries.

    Incidentally, this is one of the hard reasons that laws prohibiting sexual intercourse with animals exist. Those countries in Europe, which would like to see this liberalized throughout the EU are promoting venereal disease.

    Vote UKIP.

  72. 72
    Boring Troll says:

    Vote UKIP

  73. 73
    Cath says:

    Just heard Clegg on his LBC phone-in slot. Isn’t he just so dreadful.

  74. 74
    xplod says:

    Well, he’s certainly not Happy!

  75. 75
    One-term Dave (dragging the Tories to their grave) says:

    Apology accepted. Just make sure you don’t do it again.

    And now, I want you to write out 100 times, “I promise to henceforth pay for Dave’s wisteria pruning without so much as a squeak of complaint and furthermore I am very proud that Dave takes more than half my salary away from me and gives it to countries like India so they can send people to the moon. I can think of no better use for my money because, unlike that spiffing chap Dave, I’m a dullard and he’s gosh so very wonderful and clever.”

  76. 76
    Cor Blimey says:

    Seem to me dodgy Bercow is laying the grounds for if he should be caught with his own hand in the till.
    How did he cover for Sally up our Alley’s twitter legal fees?
    I think we should be told. Could be the scandal of the year.

  77. 77
    Nadine Dorries says:

    I’m still “bored”.

  78. 78
    Melanie Sykes says:

    Stand aside, I’ll twat her one…

  79. 79
    Hugh Janus says:

    Little Burk-O still labouring under the misunderstanding that he’s some kind of union rep for MPs – particularly those who seek to thieve. On that score he and Gorbals are about the same. Disgusting specimens. Choosing people like them tells us all we need to know about the judgement of MPs.

  80. 80
    Joe Public says:

    Daily Mirror – can you get lower to promote yourself? The Star and Workers Daily – oh sorry she does not work, just lives off the state.

  81. 81
    Bernard says:

    Boring snoring.

  82. 82
    Hugh Janus says:

    Twitter is for twats – and none bigger than this one.

  83. 83
    A yokel in Suffolk (not Tim Yeo) says:

    Oi fink that if that thar syphilis was spread from beast to man, loik you is being suggestin’, all we ‘ere in yonder county of Suffolk would ‘ave it, but we ain’t.

  84. 84
    Joe Public says:

    Great speech to the tribal followers. Nuff Sed.

  85. 85
    David Laws says:

    I wasn’t bored.

    I was ashamed to be gay. Honest.

  86. 86
    Bennie says:

    So long that she has forgotten how to use an apostrophe.

  87. 87
    Anyoldiron says:

    When we really look into what is and has been “going on” in that once well respected Houses of Parliament, we are paying them to Govern this Country according to its Constitution, yet none can do that because THEY have ratified EU Treaties that allow foreigners to make laws that even THEY have to obey. All that absolutely Contrary to our long standing Constitution that so many gave their lives for in 1939-1945, which included the deaths of many innocent children and Babies.

    Those that have “taken advantage” of their expenses, have quite deliberately stolen from the people of this Country, people that in good faith elected them. Yet all take our money for allegedly Governing this Country and so swear, “ACCORDING TO Law” BEFORE THEY MAY TAKE UP THEIR SEATS. Should we remain in the European Union I see absolutely no point at all in contributing to any one of them and our Constitution forbids us to encourage foreigners from doing so. It has been suggested that we use the 2015 General Election as the REFERENDUM we have been denied and only vote for those Political Parties or Organisations that want out of the EU. As all three major Political Parties want to remain in the EU, the outcome of the General Election should be “interesting”.

  88. 88
    Tom Catesby. says:

    The selection by MPs of Gorbals and Bercow, demonstrates very clearly to the rest of us, that they are, ‘on the money'(no pun) when it comes to their judgement, choosing muppets and puppets which they regard with zero respect. What kind of mental defect is required, to be try to justify and presumably believe, what the parliamentary criminals did and are doing, is down to a dysfunction or boredom?

  89. 89
    Politicus says:

    Remember these people thought Gordon Brown was a good idea.

  90. 90
    The voice of reason says:

    She is the Parliamentary Hugella

  91. 91
    Handycock says:

    I’m still free.

  92. 92
    Tom Catesby. says:

    She could apply for a job with Amazon as an order picker.

  93. 93
    Anonymous says:

    She’s looking as rough as old boots.

  94. 94
    The Squeaker says:

    And, my honourable friend, I was of course right to point out that Parliament is an increasing irrelevance in the path the Liblabcons have us set on.

    All law comes from Brussels, and you lot can only tinker round the edge of your master’s commands. Still, it gives me somewhere warm to sit every day.

  95. 95
    Lady Virginia Droit de Seigneur says:

    Bercow really is an odious little turd isn’t he?

    The fact that he himself was vigorously “gaming” expense claims wouldn’t have anything to do with his view would it.

    I’m not going to take lectures from someone whose snout was and, firmly, is buried in the trough

  96. 96
    Legal Beagle says:

    Bercow is an accomplice to cprruption and should be charged as such

  97. 97
    Legal Beagle says:

    Set the Roms onto him

  98. 98
    Tired taxpayer says:

    MPs are oissing in the face of the Electorate

    There really will be an uprising if they continue with crooks like this

  99. 99
    Toxic Labour for spongers, parasites, immigrants and criminals says:

    Labour can offer busting the Country, more massive borrowing, another tidal wave of shit immigrants, massive expense claims, low pensions, huge increases in charity welfare for spongers and the most corrupt governance in history. Vote for Ed Multimillionaireband.

  100. 100
    A Message Brought to you by Peppers Hairdressing says:

  101. 101
    Fuck the EU says:

    That is because sexual activity with animals in the UK is not of the same level as across the channel, and indeed, UK livestock is much cleaner.

    Google up and enjoy.

    European meat is filth, which is why it is cheap.

  102. 102
    Tedious Fecker says:

    Give Dave to some real bumsex marriage to write home about and vote UKIP!

  103. 103
    Never trust an MP says:

    Appropriate that Chuka is wearing a fleece.

  104. 104
    Another Troll ( laughing ) says:

    Thanet South.

    Labour: 36%

    UKIP: 30%

    Conservative: 24%

    Liberal Democrats: 9%

    Buh bye.

  105. 105
    Mornington Crescent says:

    An evening in a Tandoori in Clapham, listening to Ummunnna and Reeves, in aid of the Streatham branch of the Layabout Parteh. Oh, the glamorous lives some people lead!

  106. 106
    UKIP troll says:

    Get back to Dave’s cock.

  107. 107
    Butch Dave says:

    No problem, next I’m thinking of putting pictures of bum sex on fag packets.

  108. 108
    Another Troll ( laughing ) says:

    Come election time, you will not be laughing.

    Make the most of your final days, you will not be coming back.

  109. 109
    Cynical-old-bag says:

    As an ex-pat living abroad, any other EU country would be glad of the revenue generated from outside.

    We pay taxes in the country we live in, and in the UK. It’s a win-win for governments all round.

  110. 110
    Chuka's 24/7/365 snapper says:

    This snapper who constantly records every moment of Chuka’s life, does he even go with him when he takes a dump?

  111. 111
    Meanwhile the gangsters continue says:

    To pay record fines but deny any “guilt”

    http://money.cnn.com/2013/11/27/news/companies/bank-legal-costs/

  112. 112
    Englishman says:

    All porridge is disgusting. I think the Scotch invented it.

  113. 113
    Living in 45.221% white Londonistan says:

    Yer and what if the moon was made out of cheese.

  114. 114
    Fuck the EU says:

    So what are the spineless traitors in government doing about Spa!n ?

    Realpolitik would suggest that with the deteriorating political and security situation in Spa!n, UK forces should be positioned in order to defend assets which could be directly affected as well as the homeland.

    Are there regular naval patrols established in the Bay of Biscay for example ? And why is there no proper naval deployment in G!braltar ?

    The p’edophile B’arosso has still not returned the M’cCann girl. It is perhaps time for a more robust message to be sent to the EU on that score.

  115. 115
    John Tandy says:

    A total and utter berk…..

  116. 116
    Legal Beagle says:

    Britain does not have any Constitution…it has “customs”…

    This is ONE of the problems

    Parliament does what it fucking well likes and tells the plebs to go to hell

  117. 117
    Diana says:

    And black puddings.

  118. 118
    Tony Blair says:

    Or shagger…

  119. 119
    Vote UKIP or else wot? says:

    Its all the fault of the right wing press according to the BBC toady show this AM, if its were not for those pesky right wingers the workers paradise/ green utopia would be here now. Damn those pesky interfering right wing media barons.

  120. 120
    Cynical-old-bag says:

    He’s wearing a fleece – as opposed to fleecing us.

  121. 121
    Wake me up before you go go. says:

    zzzzzzzzzz zzzzzzzzz zzzzzzzzz zzzzzzzzz

  122. 122
    If I was The Met Commander says:

    These little chats between MPs as to how they could fiddle their expenses was nothing short of a massive conspiracy to defraud. The lot have them should have been charged for such.

  123. 123
    Another Troll ( laughing ) says:

    The dismal troll from Merseyside, imagines that the 2.2 million living abroad are sponging off the host countries they inhabit, rather than running businesses, living off of pensions or have holiday homes which they have paid for.

    The Roma and the rest, are not going to be arriving here with pots of accumulated wealth, rather the reverse, they see an open door to ‘free’ everything and will come here to claim it.

  124. 124
    Just askin' says:

    Are they any Tory voters left on this blog anymore?

  125. 125
    Parliamentarian says:

    We have relied on centrist reasonableness for several hundred years. But that no longer works as the centre has been forced to the left by bodies that do not have this nation’s interests at heart.

  126. 126
    Snapper says:

    Like to find out?

  127. 127
    Observer says:

    Tory, as in real Conservative? They just get called UKIP trolls here.

  128. 128
    Richard Timney says:

    I’m not forgetting, but I really think Jackie should have claimed for the tissues I used as well.

  129. 129
    Anonymous says:

    It is truth, Jim but not as we know it.

  130. 130
    The Civil Service says:

    You never did it Darling. We did it, you were merely our mouthpiece

  131. 131
    Gerald Kaufman says:

    OCD?

    Ah yes, the crystal glasses do have to be all the same. I’m ill you know.

  132. 132
    Ah!!!!!!!!!! M says:

    Yup to Tory, but undecided whether I will vote.

  133. 133
    Lady Virginia Droit de Seigneur says:

    Bercow really is an odious little t*rd isn’t he?

    The fact that he himself was vigorously “gaming” expense claims wouldn’t have anything to do with his view would it.

    I’m not going to take lectures from someone whose snout was and, firmly, is buried in the trough

  134. 134
    The Bulgarian Ambassador to the Court of St James says:

    There will only be 8000 Bulgarian nationals arriving. Honest. On the day the 8001st Bulgarian national arrives I will personally travel to Dover and set off in my togs for France in order to bring down the numbers.

  135. 135
    Accidental Observer says:

    Accidentally caught the end of some BBC series about the cold war. The reporter had clearly been brainwashed at the age of 10 by being force fed some leftist credo masquerading as a children’s book.

    His take was that the cold war had been won by pop music. Nothing to do with the West’s technical advances, democracy and civilisation. Things have of course gone pearshaped now thanks to the leftist march.

  136. 136
    Mornington Crescent says:

    No, thanks.

    Is he still servicing LU51 ANA?

  137. 137
    Mark Oaten (LibDem) says:

    YES

  138. 138
    Ma­qb­­oul says:

    Nothing. If it was on a list of items why leave it out just because it is small? I’d rather they claimed small items than large ones. If, however, it was the only item on the claim form I’d question whether the bloke understood the concepts of time and money in the real world.

  139. 139
    John F Kennedy, Ex President of the USA says:

    Thank God it never got to America.

  140. 140
    Baldy Watch says:

    I see he has turned his back on the barber

  141. 141
    P says:

    What utter cretins these people are not to have mortgaged their homes “for the duration” while putting aside necessary funds.

  142. 142
    The Navy says:

    We have a rubber offshore dinghy, complete with outboard and a full tank of fuel standing by.

  143. 143
    The Truth Gaggers says:

    Lordy. Let’s deal with the facts first

    Do P@kistanis come from backgrounds where corruption is endemic? Yes,

    http://www.spectator.co.uk/features/9088381/you-cant-say-that/

  144. 144
    Sally Bercowitz says:

    My advice Lady Virgin, from personal experience, is that if you take a firm grip on his ears with each hand, you can steer his snout precisely to the most tender morsels in the trough. Crushing his head hard between one’s thighs also helps the process.

  145. 145
    Owen Jokes says:

    HAVE YOU ALL READ MY RANCID RANT ??

    Calamity Clegg is a nice, easy target.

  146. 146
    UKIP is the new Tory Party says:

    Yep.

    But not many will vote for Dave’s Tory Lite.

  147. 147
    Self obsessed slimeball with OCD says:

    Isn’t Hunt a millionaire and living off the public teat?

    His sub 10p claims may be within the rules, but it shows a complete lack of morals and a sense of self entitlement, that is frankly, disgusting.

  148. 148
    Can't wait says:

    75 weeks to the General Election. Keep the day free.
    25 weeks to the Euros. UKIP here we come.

  149. 149
    Benny Fitz-Clements says:

    The Tories are all out working hard to pay my ‘entitlements’.

  150. 150
    Kick the foreign city of London out of England. says:

    Odious little shit.

  151. 151
    I hate socialists. says:

    Vote UKIP ,and get Miliband and Balls

  152. 152
    Baldrick's burger bar says:

    Nothing, but the amount claimed is about 1/1000th of the cash having to be spent on actually processing and paying it.

    Still, it’s only other people’s money innit….

  153. 153
    Cruikshank and Hogarth says:

    ‘Tis good to see our spirit thrives after 200 years.

  154. 154
    Baldrick's burger bar says:

    Ahem… A good brief in the CPS is a giant contradiction in terms.

    That’s why all the decent lawyers work outside government.

  155. 155
    Bedroom renter says:

    .. and can we have our money back please?

  156. 156
    Fuck the LibLabCon says:

    I believe that many a Conservative voter doesn’t necessarily vote for Dave but they vote against Miliband, that smacks of desperation.

  157. 157
  158. 158
    rick says:

    There will be no uprising – the Brits have become too week and subservient. Sad.

  159. 159
    Bedroom renter says:

    Yup, all that time and still never made it to the top. Useless hippolump. The voters of Hackney should be ashamed of themselves continually voting for this useless waste of space.

  160. 160
    Bedroom renter says:

    Oh! Are they humans? I thought they were EU robots shipped in specially for us.

  161. 161
    Living in 98.221% white Merseyside says:

    If I’m still around in 2015 I shall vote for the party that will best look after my bennies.

  162. 162
    Burgers are bad for you says:

    Who wrote this fucking eyewash?

    The “Establishment” does not pay her hubby’s wages – we do.

    Mirror, Mirror on the wall
    Who’s the crappiest of them all?

  163. 163
    Silvio says:

    Better that than Tony’s lies dear>

    Here ….have another pie …as usual, it’s free

  164. 164
    Silvio says:

    “You camma my island for a break bootiful lady, no paps, blue sea, champagne seafood and discrete bunga bunga ….you wanna i send a jet”

  165. 165
    Burgers are bad for you says:

    Just join the two wires under the steering column or behind the ignition switch together and off you go.

  166. 166
    Burgers are bad for you says:

    Well, there was sod all else on the telly to watch and we might as well use their electricity rather than ours. Not difficult. Earplugs were of course optional!

  167. 167
    Anonymous says:

    Anyone any the wiser as to why Maria Miller investigation taking so long?

    Or how come the rules allowed people like our Injustice minister to get away with having their snouts in the trough?

    And how the sorry shower at Westminster have let the banking thieves get away virtually scot free?

    With just a few scapegoats thrown to the wolves.

  168. 168
    Baffled says:

    Anyone any the wiser as to why Maria Miller investigation taking so long?

    Or how come the rules allowed people like our Injustice minister to get away with having their snouts in the trough?

    And how the sorry shower at Westminster have let the banking thieves get away virtually scot free?

    With just a few scapegoats thrown to the wolves.

  169. 169
    Burgers are bad for you says:

    He asked for a short black and sides and the barber chukka-ed him out.

  170. 170
    (Not so)Dangerous Brian says:

    We are truly fooked!
    What was true is false, what was good is bad, what was right is wrong and what was bent is now straight.

  171. 171
    Village Idiot says:

    ……We are living with the consequences of the past which can be ok,but, the recent past has inflicted untold damage on this country and sown the seeds of much turbulence at some future point!

  172. 172
    Anonymous says:

    To be fair,Clegg could never be as bad as Milliband and Balls !

  173. 173
    Anonymous says:

    But he is obviously using his time off sick posting on various boards.Its strange how in real life nobody seems to have heard of ukip !

  174. 174
    Judge Judy says:

    “These MPs were not bored, they were crooks who were banged up for breaking the law…”

    Guido, you’ve missed the point entirely.

    In the Westminster World these things are illegal only if little people do them!

    When our superhero masters do them there’s always at least one of their own – Berkow in this case – to lecture us on how we lowly plebs misunderstand their seedy deeds.

  175. 175
    Suffolk Yokel says:

    You can’t go wrong with sheep. A long way round to kiss’em though.

  176. 176
    (Not so)Dangerous Brian says:

    Abbot is a self deluding greedy hypocrite, perfect credentials for the cess pit that is the HOC.
    A pox on all their houses (even if they’ve got more than one)

  177. 177
    (Not so)Dangerous Brian says:

    And the biggest number of woofters!

  178. 178
    Anonymous says:

    Do othere who can claim expenses really scrat around for receipts for 10p and 60 p ?.

  179. 179
    Owen's Remedial English teacher says:

    > I’ve been in Parliament since 1987 and of all the Prime Minister’s since
    > Thatcher – this one is the most unwilling to answer a simple QT.

    1. New sentence instead instead of “and” after “1987”.
    2. The plural of Prime Minister is Prime Ministers
    3. “Mrs Thatcher” instead of “Thatcher”
    4. Comma instead of minus sign (not even a hyphen)
    5. “This one”? you haven’t mentioned who it is yet. I suppose you mean the current one, Mr Cameron.
    6. “QT” is not an abbreviation for “question”.
    7. Use a full stop at the end of the sentence

  180. 180
    i want my money back says:

    MP’s,BBC execs and union leaders are too far removed from reality.
    If they actually had to work hard for their cash and produce receipts for legitimate expenses, perhaps they’d realise why the rest of the working population don’t want their taxes squandered on benefit cheats and
    scrounging immigrants.

  181. 181
    Anonymous says:

    He annoys me in the way he has decided to model himself on the 2 EDs, i will always think of him coming out with silly shrill comments on free schools etc.The moron has fecked his career before it has started !

  182. 182
    Anonymous says:

    When did it become the fashion to elect inadequates to be speaker ? and how can they get away with it ? we always had intelligent well rounded people before, but with Gorbals everything changed and now this embarassment, Bercow.

  183. 183
    Iris Robinson says:

    I now, it’s outrageous

  184. 184
    Anon North Somerset Voter & now VOTING UKIP.ORG says:

    But the Tory MP for North Somerset the Foxy one, has beaten that with claims for
    THREE PENCE & ONE PENCE…………..

    Its now open speculation that Foxy One will not be returned after the G*E so
    what will he & his bosom buddy Weirritty do next, after the Tax Payer Funded
    Solid Gold gravy train has departed without them……. ????

  185. 185
    Casual Observer says:

    Why not put a free condom in each packet as well Dave? The faggots would really appreciate your concern for their welfare.

  186. 186
    Rachel reeves UGH British Obama (though I say it myself) UGH says:

    They could have stayed at home, bored out of their tiny minds, and completed copious claims. Bercow would have approved.

  187. 187
    imho says:

    I can remember the magnificence of the role of Speaker personified in George Thomas, Bernard Weatherall, and Betty Boothroyd.
    Since then, dubious are the personages who have sat in the chair. Very dubious.

  188. 188
    (Not so)Dangerous Brian says:

    Proper pair of jumped up tw*ts.

  189. 189
    Jack Ketch says:

    If UKIP could put up a thirty-something blonde lady with a pair of enormous voter-friendly offerings and a kiss-me-quick hat, they would be a shoo-in. Unfortunately, they will choose a fifty-something Godfrey clone who will say something really sillly.

  190. 190
    Jack Ketch says:

    No, it was the Spanish conquistators who copulated with llamas. The introduction of the disease to Europe can be absolutely dated to the return of the 2nd Columbus voyage and the presence of his crewmen in Naples.
    The first written records of an outbreak of syphilis in Europe occurred in 1494/1495 in Naples, Italy, during a French invasion. Because it was spread by returning French troops, the disease was known as “French disease”.
    The French are unfairly blamed–it was the wops and the dagoes.

  191. 191
    Penfold says:

    Bercow seems to be getting his defence in, ready for something….


Seen Elsewhere

100 Tories to Rebel on Plain Packs | Telegraph
May 2015 and the Art of Political Betting | MAY2015
Fate of Eurozone Rests in Hands of Videogame Expert | TechnoGuido
UKIP After Farage | Asa Bennett
Eichmann Called on Arabs to Continue War on Jews | Speccie
Mirror Hacking: 50 Legal Action Claims | Press Gazette
Mandy’s £400,000 Tax-Free Loan From Own Company | Guardian
Why We Must Remember the Holocaust | Hugo Rifkind
“Adjustments” Not Cuts | Gary Gibbon
The New Puritans | Alex Wickham
British Minister in Watch Gaffe | Straits Times


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George Galloway says of his former Respect candidate the UKIP MEP turned Tory, Amjad Bashir…

“Clearly Bashir does not have any real political principles or commitment, only naked opportunism and self-interest. He represents the revolving door principle in politics. The Tories are welcome to him because he will cause them embarrassment. Fortunately Respect was able to act before he did it to us.”


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