October 21st, 2013

Gold: Sensitive George Dancing and Brawling to Spandeu Ballet

According to Natalie Rowe’s memoirs, George Osborne used to be quite the dancer:

“The three musketeers were proper little ravers and loved to go clubbing. When George got tipsy, he lost his reserve and wanted to dance (I have a photo of him dancing at a party at my flat). He was a terrible dancer but wasn’t alone. I used to cringe when we went clubbing with the three musketeers and their friends. I couldn’t bring myself to share the dancefloor with them – just imagine tipsy public schoolboys at a disco doing robot impressions. The higher they got, the better they thought they were. George loved We Could Be Heroes by David Bowie and the three musketeers would sing it together top of their voices on the dance floor. George also adored Gold by Spandau Ballet. George didn’t have much of dress sense, neither did he make an effort to dress up – he just wore jeans and T-shirt.”

Yet he was sensitive:

“Although George never once said anything like: “I really hate what they’re saying,” at the time (I suppose he thought he’d be better off saving his energy – there was no chance of him making them stop), he was the most upset of the three and this made me feel close to him. Perhaps George was more upset because some of his acquaintances were racist towards Jews (George, who is Jewish, was christened Gideon and changed his name when he was a teenager to ‘fit in’). They’d say, “Shut up you f**king Jew,” to describe anyone they thought was being stingy. When we were alone George told me he couldn’t understand why I was with William; he said we just weren’t compatible.”

A fighter, not a quitter:

“I went and sat with George on the sofa. George couldn’t hold his own in conversation with his peers, which is why we ended up talking a lot together – we would share the fact that we didn’t have a clue, nor were we interested in what the others were going on about – arts, politics and the social shenanigans of the landed gentry. We were passing comment on somebody at the party when I leant over to whisper something to him and playfully licked his ear. William appeared. He’d seen what was going on and was pissed off. “What are you guys talking about?” he asked angrily. “Calm down William,” George said. “You’re letting your paranoia get the better of you.” The argument escalated quickly. When George tried to stand up William pushed him back down into the sofa. George then made a grab for William and they started tussling with one another. As I leapt out of the way the sofa tipped over and they rolled out onto the floor, still fighting – although it was the hugging-and-rolling type rather than the punching-and-kicking kind of fight. I thought it was hilarious. “Come on, stop it, this is ridiculous!” By the time they’d calmed down and made up, nobody had thrown a punch.”

More to come…


  1. 1
    bumbry says:


  2. 2
    Hugh Janus says:

    ‘More to come’ – please don’t bother, this stuff is just one big yawn Guido.

  3. 3
    George Gideon Oliver Osborne says:

    No one wants to listen to a story about a man with diarrhoea and no toilet paper.

  4. 4
    Diane Abbot's Conscience says:

    “The higher they got” …what were they doing? dancing on steps?

  5. 5
    Bread & Circuseseseses'es says:


  6. 6
    Diane Abbot's PR Handler says:

    Can I just point out that Diane did not charge an appearance fee for the above comment.

  7. 7
    a non says:

    Slow news day.
    Guido’s only other option is discussing whether Ed’s blank sheet of paper has lines already drawn on it to benefit those practicing their early handwriting techniques or discussing the My little Phony logo at the top

  8. 8
    Toxic Labour scum trashed my Country says:

    Don’t worry about this, start worrying if it looks like Ed Multimillionaireband will gain power. We will all be skint for life then.

  9. 9
    bolloxs says:

    Hurry up Natalie and get to the bit where you were hugely impressed/disappointed at the size of George Osbourne’s willy

  10. 10
    An un-named compassionate Conservative ! says:

    A Conservative MP was seen berating a one-legged beggar outside the Houses of Parliament in an extraordinary incident earlier this month, it has been reported.

    Daniel Kawczynski was spotted telling disabled drug addict Mark McGuigan to “get a job, find some work” before adding: “Yes, I know it is hard, I have struggled too.”

    McGuigan said he felt intimidated by the six foot eight Kawczynski, who is thought to be the tallest MP in history.

    “I can’t get a job. I can barely read and write. Look at me, I am missing a leg,” he told the Daily Mail.

    “I said that to him but he just started getting more and more aggressive. It was horrible. I felt very intimidated by the way he was leaning over me saying, ‘get a job, get a job’. He was towering over me,” he added.

    McGuigan, from Bermondsey South London, said he was raised by alcoholics and moved in and out of care homes before falling into crime and drug use.

    His alcoholism and drug addiction resulted in him losing his right leg a year ago and he is now reliant on a wheelchair.

    Onlookers were seen congratulating McGuigan after his confrontation with the Tory MP.

    Kawczynski said today he did “not recall” using the words quoted, but insisted that he was right to challenge the man on why he was not looking for work.

    “He asked me for money so I asked him what he was doing to find a job,” he told the Mail.

    “He said, ‘I can’t get a job’. He had difficulties in literacy and numeracy. I told him there were government initiatives to help him with this. I said to him: ‘If you let me know where you live I can help’.”

    Kawcynski is currently an aide to Welsh secretary David Jones.

    He boosts his parliamentary income with directorships, shareholdings and consultancies for several private companies.

    Last year he was heavily criticised after it emerged he had claimed for 72 first class rail journeys between his Shrewsbury constituency and London between 2011 and 2012.

  11. 11
    Engineer says:

    It’s not really in the Profumo and Keeler league, is it?

  12. 12
    William says:

    Eigh oop, lass, trouble at t’disco!

  13. 13
    A Floating Voter says:

  14. 14
    George says:

    She left me with a massive pubic deficit.

  15. 15
  16. 16
    Vote UKIP - don't let your granny freeze says:

    Rivetting stuff, I don’t think. Yawn. Zzzz.

  17. 17
    Average joe says:

    Enough of this crap, we want *the* topless pictures.

  18. 18
    The Piss soaked tramp known as TAT says:

    Tory MP Daniel Kawczynski told amputee: I know it’s hard but I’ve struggled my whole life without a brain.

  19. 19
    Long John Silver's parrot says:


  20. 20
    Nick Clegg says:

    The more I think about Daniel Kawczynski, the more it really irks me that a thing like this is breathing, let alone in the Conservative led coalition.

  21. 21
    Ric Holden,CCHQ says:

    After telling a one legged drug addict to get a job,Tory MP & bi-sexual, Daniel Kawczynski is to publish top tips on how to sell ones granny to raise funds.

  22. 22
    dai panting says:

    scrubber opens orifice – news?

  23. 23
    I d on't n eed no d octor says:

    Wouldn’t it just be awaiting moderation. Guido is so predictable

  24. 24
    Big 6 Energy Cartel Laughing All The Way To The Bank says:

    Come on Guido this is a snoozefest unless you’ve got some pics of Natalie in some kinky outfit in a dungeon with a bullwhip in hand.

    We’re still waiting for the De Piero titty pics :-)

  25. 25
    Mehdi says:

    Don’t miss my rant. Up there on Seen Elswhere

  26. 26
    Mehdi says:

    While you’re awaiting.
    Take a look at seen elsewhere. I’m good

  27. 27
    Roger The lodger says:

    Spandeu? What were you listening to in the 80’s Guido, your mum’s Mrs Mills records?

  28. 28
    Mehdi says:

    You’re lucky she didn’t leave you with crabs you fakir

  29. 29
    Fishy says:

    Damn it! I was just about to take Cameron’s advice and switch to Npower!!!!!

  30. 30
    Long John Silver's parrot says:


  31. 31

    ZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz. That was a nice snooze. Did I miss aught?

  32. 32

    I’ve read more interesting stuff in Exchange and Mart.

  33. 33
    Steve in Fazakerley says:

    Switched from npower to co-op earlier this month. Great decision.

  34. 34
    M103 says:

    The 5% is the profit they make on their retail arm. But their retail arm buys gas and electricity from the parent company and that’s where they make the huge profits. The real wholesale cost of gas has gone down from a shade over 70p per therm in 2010 to about 68p per therm today.
    This is profiteering and the 5% return in a smokescreen to hide their greed.
    Nationalise all essential national services.

  35. 35
    I d on't n eed no d octor says:

    I would sooner drink warm dog sick.

  36. 36
    Bob Amser says:

    Blaming the “wholesale energy market” does not wash here, because most of what the energy firms purchase is not traded on the open market, but purchased from the parent company. This vertical integration is what masks the true profits these companies make and allows them to continue their flagrant profiteering.

    It is simply unbelievable that Ofgem does not have the power to overrule these price hikes, as Ofwat did with Thames Water the other day. Hopefully the new regulator introduced by the next Labour government will have the teeth to put a stop to this madness once and for all.

  37. 37
    Ed Davey says:

    Let’s just cut these groups out of our energy equation, for a start if every town and city gathered up all its obese population and strongly encouraged them to ride on British produced exercise bikes with energy fed to dynamos and battery banks this would produce a win win situation, and may go some way to restoring national pride.

  38. 38
    Axe The Telly Tax & Religion & Kill All Ecoloons says:

    +Infinity to the power infinity.

  39. 39
    Anonymous says:

    George should speak with Huhne…

    Often the facts or crimes are very boring and minor, but it’s the denial and further lying which brings you down.

    I’m not sure George is denying anything….

    Good on him…

  40. 40
    Willie Hague says:

    Me and my baseball hat do…

  41. 41

    The pig ignorant illiterate drug addled amputee with his self inflicted miseries deserves no sympathy whatsoever

  42. 42
    Fog says:

    He loved Bowie’s ‘Heroes’ – and? So he has good taste in musics.

  43. 43

    There will never be cheap energy as long as the ecolunatics are allowed to get their way.
    Only last week the lunatic in chief, our next king ,god help us, was unable to make a speech to a meeting of pension fund managers without blethering about ‘disastrous global warming ,sustainability ,infinite resources, blah blah.
    He like the preposterous Al Gore is so blind to reality he can’t even see the contradiction of his utterances with his lifestyle , his own resources are not so finite,he keeps at least two large households with hordes of staff and fleets of cars .
    If it was not so harmful to millions of people, many of whom are suffering real hardship some of the wilder statements of these panic mongers would be highly amusing.

  44. 44
    Diane Abbot's Conscience says:

    Why the hell not? You are fired. Next!

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Boris on British Jihadis. Apparently based on MI5 intel:

“If you look at all the psychological profiling about bombers, they typically will look at porn. They are literally w***ers. Severe onanists. They are tortured. They will be very badly adjusted in their relations with women, and that is a symptom of their feeling of being failures and that the world is against them. They are not making it with girls, and so they turn to other forms of spiritual comfort — which of course is no comfort.”

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