October 8th, 2013

Reshuffle Day 2 Rolling Live Blog

  • Brownite bootboy Ian Austin stands down from front bench.
  • Luciana Berger replacing Diane Abbott as shadow public health minister.
  • Stella Creasy joins Chuka at shadow BIS. Gareth Thomas new shadow Europe minister. Rushanara Ali to shadow Education.
  • Alison McGovern and Gavin Shuker off to shadow DfiD with Jim Murphy.
  • Rob Wilson appointed Osborne’s PPS, leaving his old job as PPS to Jeremy Hunt.
  • Gavin Williamson is the PM’s new PPS, replacing Sam Gymiah who is off to the whips office. 
  • Shabana Mahmood is off to the shadow Treasury team. Jack Dromey becomes the Shadow Police Minister.
  • Wayne David PPS to Miliband.

Rolling…


267 Comments

  1. 1
    The British media are cunts says:

    This has to be the most boring thread ever. Shuffling shit is still shit.

  2. 2
    Doris Goldblatt says:

    zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz !!

  3. 3
    Sir William Waid says:

    Oliver Muppet moved from Media Liaison (Outreach) to Ministerial Bottomwiper (Department of Affairs)

  4. 4
    Rachel Reeves says:

    Even I’m more interesting than this.

  5. 5
    Sir William Waid says:

    And, by the way, our local sub-post office has a new part-time sales assistant, Kimberly Walsh.

  6. 6
    Bill Quango MP - 9 says:

    I do think the deck chairs look better in rows rather than column though, don’t you?

  7. 7
    Meanwhile back in the real world outside the westminster bubble says:

    Who ?

  8. 8
    Bill Quango MP - 9 says:

    Is that old nan Walsh’s grand daughter? I thought she was doing one of those beauty courses on a cruise ship ?

  9. 9
    Mehdi Hasan says:

    The EDL are splitting? WTF?

  10. 10
    Go on Dave. I dare you. says:

  11. 11
    JOHN REID (finger on the pulse of british politics) says:

    Dave has always been a renowned “five fingered shuffler”

  12. 12
    This man should be an MP says:

  13. 13
    Ed Moribund says:

    Since I ..I… You know…came out of the closet…I’m feeling much better about myself. I’m just happy within myself. Now I can be honest about my … Preferences and tendencies.

    I know it was a shock but you must have suspected I was a commie? The red flag underpants. The nerdy obsession with the eternal dialectic.? The camping weekends with “Len and Mark” ?

    But look.
    I am a Marxist! And I’m proud to stand up and be counted among the Marxist fraternity. .. As Lenin himself said ..

    You Go Girl!

  14. 14
    Ian Katz says:

    Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz…

  15. 15
    Tumbleweed says:
  16. 16
    Casual Observer 3 says:

    Has Frisk’s replacement been announced yet ?

  17. 17
    What a plonker. says:

    Why is there nothing on the morning news about the sacking of
    the Blairites on the shadow front bench? As we all know it was on the
    orders of the unions .Talk about Miliband as a puppet on a string.

  18. 18
    Selohesra says:

    Will Mr Wilson be placing a copy of his appointment letter in the public domain?

  19. 19
    Nadine Dorries' tweet says:

    Very sad to see Esther McVey promoted. One of parliament’s slimiest nastiest MPs. Really.Awful. Decision.

  20. 20
    Laura Norder says:

    Tracey Connelly the mother of Baby P is to be released within days? 4 years?! The parole board can go fuck themselves!

  21. 21
    She has nothing more to say says:

  22. 22
    In the UK, crime pays says:

    The parole board is stuffed with lefties.

  23. 23
    Ken Clarke, the Jurassic old fart, says:

    But of course! People shouldn’t be in prison! They should be free! Free to scamper around their communities. They’re really criminals, they’re simply mis-understood, that’s all!

    And now the Dave’s (very wisely, I think) put Norman Baker in the Home Office, we can expect many many more mis-understood people to be released from prison – or not sent there in the first place!

  24. 24
    EU Funded Pro-EU Troll says:

    Vote UKIP

  25. 25
    Posting hereunder of leftie or hoeing-at-the-pink-allotment type = sockpuppet. (SC) says:

    Don’t change from the last page so quickly.

    We haven’t stopped laughing yet… :-D

  26. 26
    Neanderthal Watch says:

    Looking at the photo of her on the Telegraph’s website, I take it she’s being moved from prison so she can be put in a zoo.

  27. 27
    Posting hereunder of leftie or hoeing-at-the-pink-allotment type = sockpuppet. (SC) says:

    Can we carry on laughing at Fatbott for at least another half hour?

    You don’t get these things happening every day, you know… :-D

  28. 28
    She's almost a parody of a thick leftie says:

    This cretin represents what’s wrong with the judicial system. Fucking retarded PC lefties like her are the problem.

    http://www.howardleague.org/francescrookblog/page/2/

    The European court is to rule tomorrow on whether it is reasonable for the UK to impose whole life tariffs without any possibility of review. The case was taken by three notorious convicted murderers who are amongst the 42 people who have been told that they will spend the rest of their lives in prison with no possibility of ever being released.

    Whole life tariffs have historically been imposed when more than one person has been killed although recently there has been a move by the courts to use the sentence when the case has generated exceptional public concern and publicity.

    The question is whether taking all hope away from someone is the right thing to do. There are some people who have done such dreadful acts and who are clearly still dangerous and are therefore not going to be released for many years. That is accepted by everyone.

    There is a moral question. Taking away all hope also denies any possibility of redemption. I have met, and believed, people who have done horrendous things and have atoned for their wrong and towards the end of their lives they have found a way to lead a good and useful life, making some amends if only in a small way. This sort of redemption should not be denied them.

    There is a practical question. Taking away all hope means that people have nothing to lose and could put staff in danger.

    Finally, there is the knock-on effect on other life sentences. The life-sentence inflation in this country is out of control. The average tariff has increased year on year. A life sentence used to be 10 to 12 years but is now commonly double that. Sentences across the criminal justice piste have lengthened in the last two decades so that this country now has one of the biggest prison populations proportionately in Europe.

    I fully appreciate public opprobrium and these are difficult stories even to consider. Yet, I still hold out my own hope that redemption is possible.

  29. 29
    Commie McCluskey and his Marxist puppet Miliband says:

    +1

  30. 30
  31. 31
    Posting hereunder of leftie or hoeing-at-the-pink-allotment type = sockpuppet. (SC) says:

    We are a kindly lot here, in a place where Fatbott is not highly regarded. Never let it be forgotten.

    Not one single person has mentioned that she is ugly.

  32. 32
    In the UK, crime pays says:

    Put her in the lion’s den. C-unt deserves to suffer.

  33. 33
    3121 says:

    Are the government PPS posts even being decided today? This seems to be taking ages…

  34. 34
    It's not rocket science says:

    “There is a practical question. Taking away all hope means that people have nothing to lose and could put staff in danger.”

    Uh-huh. If the prisoner represents a danger to staff, beat the shit out him, put him in a straightjacket and shove him in an un-heated unlit room for 2 weeks.

    If that doesn’t work, double the punishment. Continue with this cycle until there’s an improvement in his attitude.

    Or just shoot the f*cker.

  35. 35
    Ghosts of Baby P and other murdered children says:

    Bollux. Lock the bastards up for life in solitary. Deter the other fuckers like them.

  36. 36
    Toxic Labour scum trashed my Country says:

    The Hackney Hippo will be upset.

  37. 37
    In the UK, crime pays says:

    Torture, starve, beat, abuse or r*pe a child – social services do nothing.

    Look after foster kids in a loving and warm family and vote UKIP – social services will be at your door in 5 minutes.

  38. 38
    Caligula says:

    She would provide a nice little spectacle in the Coliseum.

  39. 39
    Sir William Waid says:

    And in a surprise move, Hank Marvin crosses the floor of the House to become shadow Shadow.

  40. 40
    In the UK, crime pays says:

    Too soft.

    Beat the shit out of them, put them in a straitjacket, shove them in an unheated unlit and windowless room for 2 weeks and then beat the shit out of them again and repeat as before for a further two years. THEN if there’s no improvement in behaviour, shoot the fuckers.

  41. 41
    John Prescott says:

    I’m always Hank Marvin’.

  42. 42
    The Eatanswill Clarion says:

    BILL QUANGO OVERLOOKED FOR PROMOTION AGAIN

  43. 43
    Juan Kerr says:

    Good question. Nearly all those promoted by Dave have kept a very low profile for the last three years. They have sat and voted dutifully. Anyone who has shown a trace of creative thinking or a different point of view has been side-lined.

  44. 44
    Posting hereunder of leftie or hoeing-at-the-pink-allotment type = sockpuppet. (SC) says:

    Bit of a Welcher, I thought…

  45. 45
    Diane A says:

    I am looking forward to spending more time with my cutlery.

  46. 46
    Casual Observer 3 says:

    Redemption / rehabilitation is not possible in certain cases as proven by studies.

    Exceptions:

    i) Those convicted of crimes involving children, particularly sexually motivated crimes, represent a permanent risk to children.

    ii) Violent offenders with psychopathic conditions represent a permanent risk to society at large.

    Punishment by incarceration has no impact on these types of offender.

    For the psychopath in particular, prison is just a change of condition.

    The left either have been fooled by the mask of sanity, or are wishing to protect their own. One should be aware that the left inhabit a strange almost submissive masochistic state of existence where they prefer to dominated by those who would do them most harm.

    The left are not people who would put the safety of society first in matters of incarceration.

  47. 47
    JOHN REID (finger on the pulse of british politics) says:

    William Hague’s Multi million quid give away of YOUR Money
    Another £100 million to Syria (total to date £500+ million)
    £11 million to the Lebanese military
    £87 million to Jordan for refugees
    Absolutely disgraceful abuse of our money when they are butchering our services at home

  48. 48
    Selohesra says:

    Why wasn’t Dromey Shadow Wimmins Minister

  49. 49
    The Piss soaked tramp known as TAT says:

    SHOCKING NEWS FROM SYRIA:

    Is the worn torn country about to officially split into two countries? http://fb.me/2O3VDuWMB

  50. 50
    Cameron's tax, tax, tax, spend, spend, spend, subsidy, susidy, subsidy, torwees says:

    Now all we need is for Cameron to come out of his Fabian closet and join you.

  51. 51
    Norman Baker says:

    Someone has remotely wiped my mind.

  52. 52
    Comedy quote of the decade says:

    How he managed to say this with a straight face is beyond me.

    “To be given the right to be funded by a licence fee is a tremendous privilege… Every day we are going to show that we are worthy of that commitment.”

    Lord Hall acknowledged his vision for the BBC came under the shadow of recent scandals including those involving Jimmy Savile and senior manager pay-offs. “No organisation as big as ours can avoid making mistakes. But I want to ensure that when we do make mistakes they are caused by trying to serve our viewers, not by looking after ourselves. And when we do make mistakes – and we will – let’s own up to them quickly, learn from them, and move on.”

  53. 53
    Mark Carney says:

    Don’t fret, it’s no problem…we can just print more!

  54. 54
    Bullshit Watch says:

    That phrase “Lessons will be learned” again.

  55. 55
    Posting hereunder of leftie or hoeing-at-the-pink-allotment type = sockpuppet. (SC) says:

    Forget all this boring junk about no-namers.

    No one casts a bigger shadow than Diane Abbott.

  56. 56
    Joyce Thacker says:

    4 minutes actually.

  57. 57
    Barnehurst Bob says:

    Look John, the general idea is to keep hold of your food. It will eventually work its way through and come out the same hole as your ideas.

  58. 58
    Posting hereunder of leftie or hoeing-at-the-pink-allotment type = sockpuppet. (SC) says:

    Alison McGovern is in politics because her name was an aptronym. It is an illness known as nominative determinism from which there is no known cure.

  59. 59
    Juan Kerr says:

    Perhaps Diane will now go into a monastery.

  60. 60
    Stella Creasy says:

    Me too.

  61. 61
    Hopeless Ed Miliband says:

    With recent policy announcements and now this reshuffle, Labour are clearly now a party of the hard left. Very disappointing. Does Miliband honestly expect to win from there?

    Rather than wasting time writing Labour’s manifesto, Miliband is writing its obituary.

  62. 62
    Airey Belvoir says:

    All this nonsense reminds us that there are far too many nonentities on the Government (our) payroll. There has to be a sensible cap on numbers, but no Govt will do it, because a) they like captive easy-whippable lobby fodder and b) not their money, so why should they care?

  63. 63
    The British Public says:

    Syria is none of our business

  64. 64
    Biased Broadcasting Corporation says:

    As with ‘move on’ – i.e. forget all about it and pretend it never happened.

  65. 65
    Axe The Telly Tax & Religion & Kill All Ecoloons says:

    So we are still waiting for the only reshuffle that can save the Tories from a devastating defeat in 2015.

    Come on 1922 committee what are you waiting for.

    Remember vote early,vote often,vote UKIP :-)

  66. 66
    Insp Clue Sew says:

    It is not the mistakes that are the problem – it is the being found out, the denial and the cover-ups that are.

  67. 67
    One votes UKIP says:

    The major item to re-shuffle is Cameron – if he stays, the tories will still lose.

  68. 68
    Insp Clue Sew says:

    Why? Is she perhaps and inaptronym?

  69. 69
    Insp Clue Sew says:

    My keyboard added an extraneous ‘d’. It will receive the usual coffee and biscuit crumbs all over it as punishment.

  70. 70
    Axe The Telly Tax & Religion & Kill All Ecoloons says:

    The BBC’s reputation is in tatters and its name is mud both at home and abroad.

    The sooner this vile nest of anti-British,lying, marxist pedos is shut down the better.

  71. 71
    The world's most useless comedian says:

    A M-O-N-S-T-E-R-Y more like!!

    I’ll get my coat.

  72. 72
    Fatwatch says:

    So Who is Ed’s new Minister for Obesity?

  73. 73
    Gooey Blob says:

    No room for moderates in Ed’s party. Blairites would be better off joining the Lib Dems.

    It is more than four decades since a party this left wing won an election. Labour certainly won’t win in 2015.

  74. 74
    Not too few homes says:

    Lose some immigrants and less homes would be needed
    and less tax-payers’ cash for
    schools
    hospitals
    police
    bennies

  75. 75
    Jack Pott-Winner says:

    It never worked for me.

  76. 76
    The Labour Party says:

    All 27 votes for the Labour Party that your household will submit via postal vote have already been completed and are awaiting processing.

  77. 77
    Nero says:

    The deal was: instead of being executed, you stay in prison for life

    If the deal is going to be changed, then the only reasonable result is to reinstate execution.

  78. 78
  79. 79
    Tory HQ says:

    Don’t bother voting for us, we could not even beat Gordon Brown after 13 miserable years of Labour wars and economic melt-down.

  80. 80
    Lord Mccann of Leveson says:

    Interesting tweets from libel trial

    https://twitter.com/JerryLawton

  81. 81
    Juan Kerr says:

    Could it be Twatson?

  82. 82
    Andy Burnham says:

    I was absolutely and rightly furious when the public found out that the NHS was slaughtering patients. But once my fury had subsided, I learned lessons, moved forwards and now I completely deny that any hospitals neglected anyone and no-one died and even if they did – which they didn’t – I knew nothing about it.

    La la la la la la la laaa.

  83. 83
    Gooey Blob says:

    Sorry, that should have read ALMOST four decades.

  84. 84
    broderick crawford says:

    cone on then afrije or is it chukka

    or are they interchangeable as future leaders in waiting of the tory party

    boris and gidders will not be best pleased …..

  85. 85
    broderick crawford says:

    takes a bitch to know a bastard nads

  86. 86
    Posting hereunder of leftie or hoeing-at-the-pink-allotment type = sockpuppet. (SC) says:

    Learning from the scripture of the camel going through the eye of a needle, I would have thought it would be easier for the monastery to go into Diane Abbott…

  87. 87
    broderick crawford says:

    so does this mean this other reptile who was convicted last week of maltreating and starving that poor wretch if a little boy for months and then waiting for his corpse to mummify in the bedroom while stuffing her face with pizza and scotch will be allowed out in 15 days not 15 years assuming she does not attack the warders in the first week ?

  88. 88
    Ukip says:

    Meanwhile, our best hope for the 2015 elections looks to be Horatio Algernon Pip-Pip Flange Custard the Third, who managed the total of twelve votes when he stood as a Monster Raving Loony in the local council elections last year. Obviously, we’re delighted he has now defected to us at Ukip and look forward to working with him as he helps Nigel Farage to formulate the party’s policy on bagpipes for the under-fives.

  89. 89
    Keir Hardie's ghost. says:

    Jack Dromey (Mr Harriett Harman) becomes Shadow Police Minister.

    Well his support for law and order was evident during the Grunwick dispute.
    No doubt he will be preparing the police for total union/socialist control should they win any election.

  90. 90
    Gooey Blob says:

    Cameron outpolls the Tories, Miliband drags his party down.

    Can’t see Miliband as PM. Frankly, I’d be surprised if Miliband himself thinks he’ll become PM.

  91. 91
    Paddy Pantsdown says:

    Sun loungers would be a much fairer system…

  92. 92
    broderick crawford says:

    “good” to see jack dromey has been thrown a crumb and will not be relying on Harryperson to bring home the bacon.

    in jack s new job he may just be earning enough to contribute the cabbage to the evening meal … if not the butter and parsnips .

  93. 93
    broderick crawford says:

    yeah . married to a shadow trouserwearer posing as a woman .

  94. 94
    Ronald McDonald says:

    You don’t get that fat by eating the kinds of Food that need the requirement of a knife and fork

  95. 95
    Diane Abbott says:

    and? whoopti dam doo

  96. 96
    michael winner says:

    Luciana Berger is replacing Diane Abbott. Good to see that the “casting couch” is alive and well in The Labour Party.

  97. 97
    Doh says:

    Why should companies like Starbucks which fail to pay their fair share of UK taxes be allowed to steal UK businesses’ intellectual property? Why did the government allow them to trademark the duffin?

    http://www.independent.co.uk/life-style/food-and-drink/news/hem huffin-and-puffin-over-a-duffin–the-doughnutmuffin-hybrid-raising-heat-between-starbucks-and-small-pastry-chain-8867192.html

  98. 98
    Ed Dafty, LimpDim MP, Climate Change Chieftain says:

    THAT’S WHAT I LIKE TO HEAR !

  99. 99
    Lard Pressclott of Beams, Bellies, Banjos, Bulimia, two bog seats, two Jags & Shags. says:

    ME ?

  100. 100
    Private_Schultz says:

    Great news about Simon Carr joining your team – I’ve missed his perspicacious wit.

  101. 101
    Mad, Bad & Dangerous Gordon McRuin ( Member in absentia ) says:

    That’s my boy !!

  102. 102
    Consumer says:

    EDF can leave if they wish. They won’t – because they make too much profit.

  103. 103
    Hopeless Ed Miliband says:

    You don’t know the half of it… we all had to swallow Len’s policies.

    I’m just hoping the electorate are equally docile and gullible.

  104. 104
    Abdul the Envelope Stuffer in Lahore says:

    And the postal votings. Don’t be forgetting the postal votings. My extended family is counting upon it. Many much times.

  105. 105
    Juan Kerr says:

    On a more serious note, McGovern is another Labourite Scouse victim who went to Grammar School. Would be interested to know her views on education.

  106. 106
    Hopeless Ed Miliband says:

    Don’t worry, no company will make a profit if we win the next election.

  107. 107
    Screaming Paranoia says:

    They should all be put on the sexual offenses register.

  108. 108
    Raptor says:

    “Can’t see Miliband as PM”.

    Labour voters don’t care who is PM. All they care about is getting their benefits, taxpayer-funded salaries & pensions, ethnic entitlements and “free” public services.

    35 % will do the job.

  109. 109
    A perk for da biatch says:

    Jack Dromey becomes the Shadow Police Minister.

    FREE and UNLIMITED bullet proof vests for Harriet.

  110. 110
    Rupert's friend, Bill says:

    Something akin to the badger cull seems to be in order.

  111. 111
    Tommy Robinson says:

    I’ve been reshuffled too!

  112. 112
    It's the way I tell 'em says:

    It would be a zoo with just one dog in it, a shitzu.

  113. 113
    The British media are cunts says:

    Gota love BBC news. Old toenails doing a fine job of sticking up for Ed Balls over the economy.

    Then did you see the school that they reported from in the piece about the Raspberry Pi? Talk about white, not a burkha or efnik in sight. That will have pissed off the BBC big time.

  114. 114
  115. 115
    Casual Observer 3 says:

    The energy b!ll that was passed at the start of the year was going to have this effect, as was reported.

    Ed’s speech and all of this other b/s is just cover to distract from the real reasons why energy prices are being inflated whilst wholesale prices continue to fall.

    The consumer is being done up like a kipper at the moment and the green energy surcharge is not helping.

  116. 116
    Anonymous says:

    Shouldn’t be building any new homes, it’s akin to feeding the pigeons. If you housed everyone tomorrow, you’d have another massive shortage the day after

  117. 117
    Fuck the LibLabCon says:

    Don’t forget Dave’s cluster fuck up over the boundary changes with calamity Clegg.

  118. 118
    genghiz the kahn says:

    Grunwick Jack Dromey as Labour Police Shadow Spokesman, is that one of Ed M’s little jokes?

  119. 119
  120. 120
    genghiz the kahn says:

    Now then, now then what did Labour’s new Police spokesman think of the Met all those years ago at Grunwick.

  121. 121
    Jennifer Saunders says:

    The BBC is an executive-run place for idiots.

  122. 122
    Aechmophorus says:

    No, I think it’s a deadly earnest sign that the police will do the left’s bidding.

  123. 123
    Honest View says:

    Alas, it just isn’t true. There are enough left-wing suckers in this country to vote Labour home fairly comfortably, especially given the Labour bias of our unreformed boundaries. Thanks, Clegg.

  124. 124
  125. 125
    nellnewman says:

    adamafriye is too busy promoting himself as next tory leader to take up a run of the mill pps job.

  126. 126
    Honest View says:

    Spot on.

  127. 127
    Axe The Telly Tax & Religion & Kill All Ecoloons says:

    Try dodging a bullet to the head :-)

  128. 128
    Axe The Telly Tax & Religion & Kill All Ecoloons says:

    I’d like to see them try carting off the power stations and other infrastructure when they leave :-)

  129. 129
    Juan Kerr says:

    Luciana has been making a sequel to “Eyes Wide Shut” called “Legs Wide Open”.

  130. 130
    Axe The Telly Tax & Religion & Kill All Ecoloons says:

    Abbott was too big to fit on the couch :-)

  131. 131
    Maria Miller is a Mong says:

    My wife watched that and said, “That’s obviously a private school.”

  132. 132
    The Wrong Miliband's British-hating commie dad says:

    My boy will be in mourning if he doesn’t get to be PM.

  133. 133
    Nick Clegg (the most odious cunt in Westminster) says:

    I believe in democracy.

    Honest.

  134. 134
    Barry says:

    I will not be constrained by a debt ceiling or anything called a budget!

  135. 135
    Socialism is a severe mental illness says:

    To be honest, a bullet through Harriet’s head isn’t going to make a world of difference.

  136. 136
    John from Hull says:

    I punched above my weight when I was Minister of Affairs.

  137. 137
    the man with no name says:

    you can fuck off. did your mother never teach you netiquette ?

  138. 138
    The BBC: an anachronism for more than 90 years says:

    “Executive” is overplaying it.. ‘Mong’ is more accurate.

    Who was it who said yesterday that the BBC is run by “media studies idiots” who spend meetings staring at their iPhones only to look up and “ask about the ‘journey'”?

    Bollocks, the BBC just needs to be shut down. It is a seething pile of shit.

  139. 139
    Ed Ballsup says:

    Me neither.

  140. 140
    Oh Woe is Me. Flabbott says:

    Fatbott has been reduced to Tweetears and is only capable of Retweeting the Tweets of others. So bad has it got that she is reTweeting Mrs Gordon Brown.

    https://twitter.com/hackneyabbott

  141. 141
    Alfie Asbo (typical Labour voter) says:

    My bennies are my human rights and Ed Miliband agrees. And what’s more like is I went for a kabab right and it was like £3 which is a cost of living crisis because I like didn’t like have no money and Ed will like make people sell kababs for like a price I can pay, which is £0.

    Ed Miliband is like well good.

  142. 142
    Socialism is a severe mental illness says:

    To be honest, she’s had her day and the next big event in the morbidly obese racist bitch’s life is going to be her death, which can’t come soon enough.

  143. 143
    Lefty Abbott replaced by a White Blairite says:

    OMG. She’s been replaced by Luciana Berger, a white chick who was made to divide and rule if ever I saw one. Not content with climbing Euan Blair’s greasy pole she’s had a good shimmy up Chuka’s too.

  144. 144
    Bilda Berger says:

    Too soft.

    Tie them up in a chair with hands behind their back. Put headphones on them. Then play them every single CD ever released by Max Bygraves. Repeat until they beg for mercy, then start on the Des O’Connor. If Des doesn’t turn their brains to mush (you can tell when grey matter starts dribbling out of the nostrils), move on to the ultimate — Jim Reeves.

  145. 145
    Sell Out says:

    How many EDLers can you fit in a stretch limo?
    Just the two – Tommy and Kevin.

    The rest can get a bus or walk.

  146. 146
    Gordo McMong says:

    Budgets are for the little people, who live at the bottom of my garden.

  147. 147
    Coded? says:

  148. 148
    the man with no name says:

    that’s quite funny, the background as a glow behind the “MP” letters to draw attention to the importance that she is an MP

  149. 149
    Scousers' MP works for Scouse MP. The Liverpool Pathway will never walk alone says:

  150. 150
    Diane Abbot has left the building says:

    I’m a c unt!

    Seeya!

  151. 151
    Barry says:

    Raising the debt ceiling does not increase debt.

  152. 152
    Anonymous says:

    They do not need to be in solitary. It is too cruel.

    What they need is to be at least 10 feet away from anyone else, and working so hard that they have no time to think. They should only be in isolation at night.

    Obviously being too exhausted to do anything but sleep.

    If they fail to comply they have to be 20 feet away. Then 30 feet. They must always see people better off than themselves and it being an achievable target for themselves.

    Freedom should not be the longed for goal of these people. They need more basic goals.

  153. 153
    Diane's friend down the pie shop says:

    No words of comfort for the outgoing shadow obese health minister Lucy?

  154. 154
    Jack Droney says:

    Looks like Dromey went crying to Harpic and she got him another job.

  155. 155
    Not Any More you ain't says:

    Diane Abbott MP for Hackney North and Stoke Newington
    Shadow Minister for Public Health

    http://www.dianeabbott.org.uk/

  156. 156
    The slippery political pole says:

    How many c***s did Lucky Luciana suck to get this new role?

  157. 157
    The slippery political pole says:

    Delighted to join a mass murderer?

  158. 158
    Drunken Thug Watch says:

    Or go back to shouting abuse at the away fans from the safety of the disabled enclosure.

  159. 159
    Andy Burnham says:

    It’s not mass-murder if I pretend it didn’t happen.

    Which it didn’t.

    And anyway, I didn’t know about it.

  160. 160
    Lord Effingham says:

    Notice how Portillo is leaning towards Flabbott, clearly against his will?
    The bitch is so fat she obviously generates her own gravitational field. Just like a black hole. Come to think of it…

  161. 161
    Conspiracy Watch says:

    Given that the M’cCann libel trial transformed itself into a false advertising trial with the evidence submitted today, could the appointment of Norman Baker into the Home office be a means to discredit the Home Office at a time when questions will be asked about operation G’range ?

    (Especially if the M’cCann’s wind up being on the receiving end of a Portuguese issued EAW…)

  162. 162
    I say, I say, I say says:

    .
    .
    Diane Abbott has got a new job,
    Jamaica ?
    No she left of her own accord

  163. 163
    Socialism is a severe mental illness says:

    “Diane Abbott has got a new non-job,
    Jamaica ?
    No she left of her own accord sat back and it landed in her lap.”

    Kerrrrrching!

  164. 164
    Public Health Warning. Rice and Peas can Kill says:

    /large

  165. 165
    I say, I say, I say says:

    Diane Abbott is looking for a new job.
    Jamaica ?
    well I had to, she was fat and useless

  166. 166
    Public Health Warning. Rice and Peas can Kill says:

    https://pbs.twimg.com/media/BWDyrHQCQAAdyvI.jpg:large

  167. 167
    The British media are cunts says:

    @129 certainly wasn’t an Alistair Campbell state school. More likely to find the
    Kids of Labour politicians there than white working class.

  168. 168
    The British media are cunts says:

    He can give Hattie a seeing to with his truncheon.

  169. 169
    perv says:

    there’s two options for ***

  170. 170
    The British media are cunts says:

    Diane Fatbot has gone to spend more time with the toilet and her arse.

  171. 171
    Gladstone says:

    That coloured old bag looks worn out.

    Diane looks tired too.

  172. 172
    The British media are cunts says:

    The BBC agree.

  173. 173
    Point of Information 7 says:

    The establishment of Kurd!stan by ceding some territory in northern Syr!a is a possibility that A’ssad may be open to. This would suit T’urkey and help provide stability in the region. It would win points in A’ssad’s favor with the international community as such a move would place unbearable pressure on the !raqi government to follow suit.

    The only viable solution for the K’urd issue is formation of a new state. The alternative less viable is genoc!de.

    Talk of the insurgent factions being able to form a credible stable government are fanciful at best. Some commanders may try to declare A’leppo independent, but that will not last long. If they do not collapse infighting, then either A’ssad or T’urkey would defeat them.

    It is in no ones interest for the insurgent forces to survive this, except for the insurgents themselves. Most of that article is !srael! black propaganda designed to antagonize the US and perhaps A’ssad.

  174. 174
    The BBC Director General says:

    It’s not really important if it’s just the mass murder of British people. And anyway..

    Oh, here’s The One Show, with an item about the joys of Multiculturalism.

    Look, everybody! Matt Baker is pretending he can’t pronounce T’s in the middle of words.

    Yay! The One Show.

    Enjoy.

  175. 175
    Keep Calm, Vote UKIP says:

    V’aclav K’laus (ex President C’zech Republic):

    Calls for Czech Republic to exit EU, and says ‘EU is in any case doomed, like empires of the past, including communism’

    Vote UKIP

  176. 176
    Fuck the EUSSR says:

    I can’t see how banning Menthol from fags can be legal if it is a harmless substance.

  177. 177
    Ban Ban Ban Control Control Control Ebforce Enforce Enforce says:

    A little squirty capsule should scupper their stupid plan.

  178. 178
    EU Watch says:

    It is not just UKIP / UK which has concerns about future in the EU.

    Characterized as a protest vote, the increasing support which those parties opposed to Euro / EU are gaining in many European countries is a direct reaction to the failure of the EU to solve the economic problems across the region and reflective of the illegitimacy of the EU as a political entity.

    The latter point directly speaks to the lack of political union and demos which many now see clearly missing at the core of the commission.

    An increase in size of the bloc vote available to the European Freedom & Democracy movement, of which UKIP is a part, will to a degree force change in Europe. If those parties start picking up seats in national elections, as UKIP appear to be on course for in the UK, then the break up of the EU itself could perhaps start.

  179. 179
    Execute the murdering scum. Job done ! says:

    Redemption is indeed possible at the end of the hangmans noose. C unts !

  180. 180
    Execute the murdering scum. Job done ! says:

    Sounds good to me. Our legal system is no longer fit for purpose and is administered by retards and wankers.

  181. 181
    chubby Dave's cat says:

    It’s herbal, like catnip

  182. 182
    tn02 says:

    Re Luciana Berger

    She’s a J*wish chick. Notice the similar looks to Miliband.

  183. 183
    chubby Dave's cat says:

    Why are the millions of European immigrants able to vote here ? surely that means that they get to have 2 European votes ? one here and one wherever they came from ?

  184. 184
    tn02 says:

    Over here, we use the s instead of the z…as in characteriSed. Are you American perchance?

  185. 185
  186. 186
    EU Watch says:

    Economic problems persist in Italy. Bank of !taly revealed that bad loans issued by !talian banks rose 22.3% Y/Y in August.

    Pressure in !taly caused by illegal north Afr!can migration is beginning to become a noticeable problem. (More so than a few years back when one noticed it whilst trying to have a peaceful coffee in Naples, ahem….)

    The UN are beginning to get involved:

    h**p://www.un.org/apps/news/story.aspNews?ID=46206&Cr=italy&Cr1=#.UlRrG-TOtfZ

    And:

    Meanwhile in Greece some GPO poll results for the parties:

    ND         : 21.0% 
    SYRIZA     : 20.5% 
    Golden Dawn:  7.8% 
    PASOK      :  6.0% 
    KKE        :  6.0% 
    Ind. Greeks:  4.5%
    

    h/t @electionista

  187. 187
    Sell Out says:

    Tommy and Kevin have been part of the establishment from the very beginning, like we never knew :)

    By the way I’m not drunk or a thug so please watch someone else.

  188. 188
    Sell Out says:

    You were fake anyway.

  189. 189
    EU Watch says:

    One uses mainly US spellings and grammar as one prefers to communicate using spelling and grammar of the free, rather than that of the oppressed.

    Once UK English is properly free again one may switch back.

    The language of slaves should be avoided.

  190. 190
    Fuck the LibLabCon says:

    The only honest thing you’ve ever said Diane.

  191. 191
    Democracy Now says:

    Why not? The UK electoral system is a joke anyway. In Westminster elections, one vote in Western Scotland has the same weight as five in the Isle of Wight in England.

    Constituency boundaries are openly rigged for party political advantage and postal vote fraud is common in many parts of the UK. In one ward in Walthamstow (Stella Creasy, Labour) a voter turnout of 125% was declared in 2010 and no-one at the count batted an eyelid.

  192. 192
    T May says:

    Yankee go Home

  193. 193
    chubby Dave's cat says:

    yes, I’ve always thought that there are not enough words with the “z” in the English language. “Zzzs” just look more punk than “Ssss”

  194. 194
    EU Watch says:

    The 4th time this year that the L!sbon subway has been closed down due to strike action:

  195. 195
    chubby Dave's cat says:

    Isn’t that sort of thing why we have police ?

  196. 196
    EU Watch says:

    Would appear that G!braltar are giving up on the EU and L’ondon (specifically Cameron ?) to help with their Span!sh problem, and are turning to the US for help:

  197. 197
    Captain Schett!no says:

    It was a rust bucket anyway. Scuttled it, I did. Next stop, leading Bunga bingo`s party I think.

  198. 198
    Jul!an Cleary! says:

    3 phones,eh. A man of some importance, clearly.

  199. 199
    Assad says:

    I have a way with the Kurds.

  200. 200
    Sir William Waid says:

    They can sell their electricity into other markets.

  201. 201
    UKIP says:

    Why has he got that stupid blue flag with the gold stars in his office?

  202. 202
    The EU is creating this says:

    Please note that out of all the polls last year ‘tromaktiko’ was the most accurate and came very close to the actual rates of the Golden Dawn in 2012 elections.

    This is from the latest unweighted tromaktiko poll sample of 43,564 Greek Citizens last week.

    Syriza 29.7%
    Golden Dawn 18.9%
    New Democracy 18%
    PASOK 8.7%
    KKE 6.6%
    Independent Greeks 5%
    Democratic Left 3%

  203. 203
    Fuck the LibLabCon says:

    Dave told him to on pain of bumsex marriage.

  204. 204
    Plod says:

    You want what?

    You seriously think we are going to arrest the Boundary Commission, the Electoral Commission and every incumbent in Westminster for their roles in subverting our democracy?

    Ha ha ha ha ha.

    Who pays us mate?

  205. 205
    Fuck the LibLabCon says:

    What a waste of skin.

  206. 206
    Macho Macho Man says:

    Do they allow that in Gibraltar?

  207. 207
    chubby Dave's cat says:

    and a “Z” is more masculine and affirmative compared to the woosy, curvy ” S”

  208. 208
    chubby Dave's cat says:

    “B”s are good tho’ like in Boobs, it just seems to work.

  209. 209
    Drunken Thug Watch says:

    I once watched an EDL march and reckon that well over 70% involved were under the influence. The chanting was moronic.

  210. 210
    The Swiss get it! says:

  211. 211
    Gonk says:

    Oh God ! The Statesman(woman)-like quip already.

  212. 212
    chubby Dave's cat says:

    Er, well yes

  213. 213
    EU Watch says:

    To put the distribution of groups in current European Parliament (7th 2009 – 2014) into perspective:

    Group                                                          %   (MEP)
    ------------------------------------------------------------------------
    EPP       (European People's Party)                         :35.77%(274)
    S&D       (Progressive Alliance of Socialists and Democrats):25.46%(195)
    ALDE      (Alliance of Liberals and Democrats for Europe)   :11.10%( 85)
    Greens-EFA(The Greens-European Free Alliance)               : 7.57%( 58)
    ECR       (European Conservatives and Reformists)           : 7.31%( 56)
    GUE_NGL	  (European United Left-Nordic Green Left)          : 4.57%( 35)
    EFD	  (Europe of Freedom and Democracy)                 : 4.31%( 33)
    NI        (Non-Inscrits)                                    : 3.92%( 30)
    

    Total MEPs Europarl: 766

  214. 214
    EU Watch says:

    This is a long vid, but worth watching if interested in some of the issues which Spa!n are trying to raise against G’ibraltar.

    Video is Council on Foreign Relations discussion with Fab!an P!cardo, Chief Minister of G’ibraltar.

  215. 215
    Herman van Rumpboy says:

    SO WHAT ?

  216. 216
    Ed Balls - Shallow Chancer says:

    JAW JOZBOURNE IS CUTTING TOO FAR, TOO FAST; THE ECONOMY IS FLAT-LINING; WE NEED A PLAN ‘B’ NOW………..

  217. 217
    William Tell says:

    It’s the Italians they have to watch out for.

  218. 218
    Know Your Enemy says:

    Which ones aren’t ripping us off?

  219. 219
    EU Watch says:

    The differences between the two polling sources is striking – similar in some ways to the clear differences between those in the UK and how they gauge UKIPs share.

    There is clearly some propaganda being played out.

    One would suggest that the Golden Dawn support is being deliberately low balled (fictionalized low) by the media and on social media in order to suppress dissent over the arrest.

    Claiming support has dropped for a party before arresting senior figures and then banning the party appears to be the strategy.

  220. 220
    Keep Calm, Vote UKIP says:

    EFD for sure are not.

    Vote UKIP.

  221. 221
    The EU is creating this says:

    The propaganda is at full swing and will be up until May 2014.

  222. 222
    Alex says:

    Dromey gets a shadcab position after three years as an MP?

    Oh well, nice to see that Labour believes in gender equality as far as fucking your way up the greasy pole is concerned.

  223. 223
    The Fifth Ouzo says:

    Unless steps are taken to resolve the underlying issues giving rise to the popularity of groups like Golden Dawn, arresting a few leaders is not going to solve things and could lead to escalating conflicts with whoever takes on their mantle.

  224. 224
    It's never labours fault is it? says:

    At this point surely Balls can be seen for the idiot he really is. Everything he has said and done has been wrong wrong wrong. If people vote Labour back in to complete the damage after the coalition have dragged us back from the brink then they deserve every thing they will surely get. A. labour government that will take us back to square ones well as well as the 1970’s

  225. 225
    The British media are cunts says:

    funny how all the left wing media have been sneering at Tommy Robinson’s apparent change of heart yet when it was the IRA, Gerry Adam and of course endless so called reformed Muslim terrorists, the BBC, Channel4 and Guardian accepted them no questions asked.

  226. 226
    The Labour Shadow Cabinet says:

    We don’t mention the Poles.

  227. 227
    The EU Accounts says:

    They decline their salaries and make no expenses claims! Who knew?

  228. 228
    Fuck the LibLabCon says:

    Same can be said of NI and to a lesser extent ECR but the rest are pro-EU.

  229. 229
    Juan Kerr says:

    Ed will take the line that recovery would have been faster under Liebour ( impossible to disprove) and anyway has now changed his attack to cost of living.

  230. 230
    Diane Says Ed was Right but still sticks the knife in about prepared scripts says:

    Diane Abbott: ‘Ed Miliband was right to sack me’ – video

    http://www.channel4.com/news/diane-abbott-ed-miliband-was-right-to-sack-me-video?utm_source=twitterfeed&utm_medium=twitter

  231. 231
    Diane whalebot says:

    Obviously she was weighing down the shadow cabin ray

  232. 232
    Gaye Mann (Mrs) says:

    An Al Campbell has been rehabilitated as a national treasure

  233. 233
    National Socialism is Socialism says:

    A load of them are on Twitter suggesting Tommy joins UKIP.

    Not sure if that is going to happen.

  234. 234
    Adolf Miliband's Führerprinzip says:

    Ich sagte zu ihm: “Sie müssen richtig sein, du bist der Anführer, es gibt Ihre Kabinettsumbildung.”

  235. 235
    A European drawing room says:

    Perhaps he couldtake the revolver and whiskey route?

  236. 236
    The Guardian has put all Britons in Danger from Terrorists says:

    So the MI5 Chief says that the GUARDIAN newspaper has put us all in danger from Islamic extremists by publishing the material that Snowden stole. Isn’t that just a tad more serious than Alan Partridge’s drug life?

  237. 237
    Casual Observer 3 says:

    Publishing the S’nowden revelations is problematic for the security agencies, but the Guardian’s publication is not. The publication of S’nowden by Guardian is in our favor. Recall that S’nowden had gone to C’hina to spill the beans before heading off to R’uss!a. Guardian is irrelevant from this perspective.

    G’uardian did put security at risk by sending copies of classified data it held to bloggers in the US. (Recall the hdd’s which they symbolically destroyed after the airport detention ?)

    The real case for press regulation is to stop certain factions within the establishment from publicly tearing strips off of each other.

    It is clear that the newspapers themselves have nothing to lose, and it is also clear that ‘freedom’ of the press in the UK is only freedom for the establishment at present, and not the public.

    Cui bono should be considered, and the proposals appear to favor the political hierarchies.

  238. 238
    J'immy S'avile Under 5's Bagpipe Fiddler says:

    Now then, now then, ** squeeze **, how’s about that then !

  239. 239
    Someone says:

    Why do all the failed politicians gravitate towards UKIP?

  240. 240
    The need to know basis says:

    I don’t believe anything which is attributed to the head of M15.

    You don’t need to know why.

  241. 241
    Jacqueline Dromey says:

    I would like to make it clear that I have joined Red Ed’s Shadow Home Office team, not his Shadow second Home Office team.

    That was Jacqueline Smith under Gordon the Moron.

  242. 242
    Pawns and Queens says:

    So this “statement” by MI5 is just the establishment softening up the public to accept greater press censorship by the state?

  243. 243
    Juan Kerr says:

    I’ve had a comment awaiting moderation for 3½ hours now. Is this a record or did moddy have an early night?

  244. 244
    Well it would be erman. Dave is one of you lot says:

  245. 245
    Wich one are you Herman? says:

  246. 246
    Abbot and Costello meet the killer Andy Burnham says:

    Where from the UAF enclosure where you all reeked of pot and self-loathing?

  247. 247
    Diane Abbott's Epitaph says:

  248. 248
    Aechmophorus says:

    Most of them gravitate towards the EU.

  249. 249
    Keep Calm, Vote UKIP says:

    Question should be: Why do the left assume failed politicians will gravitate towards UKIP ?

    Answer: Because the left are stupid and like to smear.

    Reasoning:

    http://politicalscrapbook.net/2013/10/is-tommy-robinson-planning-to-run-for-office/

    Note: UKIP would not accept Tommy as he is a self recognized as having had membership of EDL.

    The left should not distract people from the fact that they are running a lot of failed European politicians, particularly !talian ones, as MEPs in 2014.

    Vote UKIP :-)

  250. 250
    Casual Observer 3 says:

    It should be read as an admission that the strategy to contain domestic J’ihad may have failed. The closing of muzzie schools lately pose a bigger threat to public security by antagonizing the muzzie community than does the activities of the virtually unread G’uardian.

  251. 251
    Blue Peter Goldfish says:

    Grilled?, somebody has been microwaved on the wrong wattage setting.

  252. 252
    Vince Cable says:

    I don’t remember David Cameron meeting Herman Van Rumpy

  253. 253
    Drunken Thug Watch says:

    The UAF, who were mainly from outside the area as well were about half a mile away at that point.

    No. I simply walked along the road and went right up close to look at the EDL as did several of my neighbours. The police ‘escort’ also did not know the local area very well and it was quite possible, as a local, to walk round it to get close to the EDL and have a good long look at them and listen to what they were singing and shouting.

    Very unimpressive they were too. They were abusing anyone with black or brown skin, and clearly did not know, or care to know, the difference between a muslim extremist (the ostensible purpose for their marching) and the local hindu population.

  254. 254
    Jack Ketch says:

    They teach that phrase in Useless Thieving Hunt School. NB, Members of Parliament, heads of NGOs, Council officials and senior[police officers also attend lessons there.

  255. 255
    Bob Fleming says:

    Diane loved it while it lasted. I know I would if I was a dirty old slapper

  256. 256
    albacore says:

    It’s just a Parliamentary re-shuffle
    Hardly merits this hoo-hah and kerfuffle
    After all, they’ve got nowt to shuffle but shit
    Kinder not to make a song and dance of it

  257. 257
    Ma­qb­oul says:

    The bedroom tax will flush out acres of spare accommodation. And we should stop breeding like flies.

  258. 258
    Ma­qb­oul says:

    Yes, do you seriously think Gu­ido is reading every comment before releasing it into the blog? You named yourself well.

  259. 259
    Pause Button says:

    The average Labour supporter isn’t left wing at all and generally couldn’t care less about Marxist politics.

    They are however acutely aware that they are Labour clients who depend almost entirely on Labour’s generousity with other peoples money for their livelihood.

    The Labour party, via other peoples money, OWN their votes and along with boundaries that favour Labour, postal voting fraud that favour Labour, the BBC that favour Labour and a Conservative party leadership that has been utterly cowardly and useless in the face of these factors, it is entirely possible that Miliband could get the keys to number 10, by default.

    Though the fly in everyones ointment is UKIP, who could well be the third party in another hung parliament. It would then be ‘game on’ for a resurgence of a united right, without of course, Cameron at the helm.

  260. 260
    Pause Button says:

    We?

    It’s not indigenous Brit’s who are ‘breeding like flies’. The most popular name for new born male children in London, is M0h@med, and nationally it’s second favourite.

  261. 261
    Pause Button says:

    It’s called NLP, as used by the governments ( Labour, Lib-Dem or Conservative, they ALL support it ) favourite Marxist ‘charity’ Communist Purpose.

  262. 262
    Labour destroys economies and jobs says:

    So its a defeat for balls and the idiot just thinks of another way to inflict damage on a government that IS clearing up his mess
    Utter Cnut he is and his party

  263. 263
    Pause Button says:

    £425 of your energy bill this year is hidden subsidy and green taxes.

    Next year it will be more and every year until 2050 the subsidy and tax element will rise.

    Why so? Look no further than Ed Miliband’s Climate Change Act, the single biggest lie ever laid before the British people and cravenly supported by the Conservative and Liberal- Democrat parties.

    Nothing will ever change while these lying, parasitic parties are in power.

  264. 264
    Pause Button says:

    Of course you do Nicky, just like these guys did.

  265. 265
    George Osborne says:

    I agree, that’s why I’m doubling the UK debt by 2015!

  266. 266
    Little Muffett (Miss) says:

    So do I

  267. 267
    REALWORLDER says:

    The HORROR The HORROR


Seen Elsewhere

100 Tories to Rebel on Plain Packs | Telegraph
May 2015 and the Art of Political Betting | MAY2015
Fate of Eurozone Rests in Hands of Videogame Expert | TechnoGuido
UKIP After Farage | Asa Bennett
Eichmann Called on Arabs to Continue War on Jews | Speccie
Mirror Hacking: 50 Legal Action Claims | Press Gazette
Mandy’s £400,000 Tax-Free Loan From Own Company | Guardian
Why We Must Remember the Holocaust | Hugo Rifkind
“Adjustments” Not Cuts | Gary Gibbon
The New Puritans | Alex Wickham
British Minister in Watch Gaffe | Straits Times


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George Galloway says of his former Respect candidate the UKIP MEP turned Tory, Amjad Bashir…

“Clearly Bashir does not have any real political principles or commitment, only naked opportunism and self-interest. He represents the revolving door principle in politics. The Tories are welcome to him because he will cause them embarrassment. Fortunately Respect was able to act before he did it to us.”


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