August 27th, 2013

MPs Hit By White Powder Terror Hoax

MPs are being drilled in how to deal with an anthrax attack after brown envelopes containing white powder were sent to their Westminster and constituency offices. Guido understands the harmless bodybuilding protein powder, postmarked from Exeter, has been received by a number of Members’ offices over recent weeks. Presumably the hoaxer is not familiar with the concept of recess.

In the event they receive a similar package, MPs and their staff have been instructed by the Serjeant-at-Arms to close their windows and doors, turn off the air-con and wait for the cops. Ruining a nineteen year old intern’s day probably isn’t quite the anti-state sedition Exeter’s top moron had in mind…


93 Comments

  1. 1
    Ma­q­boul says:

    West country liberals ha !

  2. 2
    maggie the dog says:

    Cameron should be at home with white powder

  3. 3
    oh dear says:

    I bet the idiot put his return address on the back of the envelope.

  4. 4
    Dave Killgore says:

    I love the smell of toast in the morning. It smells like……….VICTORY!

  5. 5
    George Osborne says:

    I know what to do with white powder

  6. 6
    Axe The Telly Tax & Religion & Kill All Ecoloons says:

    White powder!

    Are you sure this isn’t a beeboid bumboy story.

  7. 7
    The British Public says:

    How about our MPs being taught how to identify and act in the interests of the will of the people?

    Syria is none of our business.

  8. 8
    Ron Barras says:

    If only the Serjeant-at-Arms could close the windows and doors, turn off the air-con and wait for the cops to arrest the MPs.

    These scummers do far more damage to the nation with their clumsy laws, expense troughing and grandstanding than someone from Exeter with a book of stamps.

  9. 9
    Concrete Jungle says:

    The race is on to who can cover the country in concrete at the fastest pace

    Could be cement dust

  10. 10
    SamCam says:

    To show solidarity with our SAS boys in Syria, today I’ve ‘gone commando’ stylee

  11. 11
    Exeter breaks the Geneva Convention says:

    So Dave is sure it’s coming from Exeter? If so then there’s only one thing he can do, send in the drones and cruise missiles, that’ll teach Exeter not to use weapons of mass destruction on Westminster.

  12. 12
    The British Public says:

    False flag.

    Someone is trying to ‘nudge’ MPs to support an attack on Syria

  13. 13
    Dave says:

    Get me Jethro on the secure satellite phone, I’m going to arm the Ylocals.

  14. 14
    Pikey Northerner says:

    Won’t be long until they use this as an excuse to spend millions on security systems for themselves.

    See how they’ve surrounded themselves with a ring of concrete and steel and police patrols. Siege mentality to keep the voters away.

    Meanwhile normal folk get burgled or the car stolen and police don’t care.

  15. 15
    Tom Baldwin says:

    Let it snow!

  16. 16
    Field Marshal Dave says:

    Look at the size of my baton! Aren’t I a big tough decisive macho Prime minister?

  17. 17
    Blair worships... Blair says:

  18. 18
    L/Cpl Jones says:

    Give the lads a cam gash flash, Sam.

  19. 19
    Mr Timothy Adams says:

    From :Mr Timothy Adams
    Senior Auditor Foreign Remittance Unit
    Bank Of Africa (BOA)
    Ouagadougou – Burkina-Faso
    West /Africa.

    Confidential Business Proposal!!

    I am Mr Timothy Adams, the senior Auditor In charge of Foreign Remittance Unit, Bank Of Africa (BOA) Ouagadougou Burkina Faso. I have a business which will benefit both of us, The amount of money involved is ($15 Million Dollars) which i want to transfer from an abandoned account to your bank account; it is 100% risk free.

    After the end of the business, We shall agree that 40% will be for you in respect of all your assistance for this transaction and 50% will be for me and the rest 10% will be consider as our expenses which we might incure during the progress of the transaction such as telephone Bills,internet communication e.t.c. I will like you to provide immediately the below information’s, to enable me use it and get you next of kin application form from my bank.

    1.Full Name:………………….
    2.Full Address:……………….
    3.Telephone Number:……………
    4.Country:……………………
    5.Occupation:…………………
    6.Age:……………………….
    7.Sex:……………………….

    As soon as you reply, I will let you know the next steps and procedures and more details to follow in order to finalize this transaction immediately. Please reply me with this email address

    Yours Sincerely,
    Mr Timothy Adams.

    PS I am as trustworthy as David Cameron

  20. 20
    Kerry and Blair meet in Rome to discuss rge ongoing Holy wars.i says:

  21. 21
    Django overview! says:

    But Syria is one of the factors in the shaping of policy fitted to our perceived interests in the Middle East… The chemical attack on civilians opens the door to taking action if it is thought expedient to our interests.

  22. 22
    Anonymous says:

    It’s amazing what bleach can do to Gunpowder . . .

  23. 23
    Anonymous says:

    MP’s discover online bath salts market

  24. 24
    BLAIR the IMPALER says:

    ” As middle east peace envoy , I say Slaughter the fucking Syrians ”
    Should keep me in my multi million pound job for the next 10 years “

  25. 25
    Percy says:

    Very good, but I thought all mps mail was scanned to avoid any nasties, bombs, booby traps, drugs etc

  26. 26
    Sir William Waid says:

    “In the event they receive a similar package, MPs and their staff have been instructed by the Serjeant-at-Arms to close their windows and doors, turn off the air-con and wait for the cops.”

    Wouldn’t it be better to leave the room, too?

  27. 27
    Sir William Waid says:

    If only William Hague were taller. It’s the Napoleon Complex, you know.

  28. 28
    Sir William Waid says:

    Terrible, shoddy Italian brickwork.

  29. 29
    albacore says:

    With the deliberate destabilisation
    LibLabCons have visited upon this nation
    They ain’t reaping owt that they themselves haven’t sown
    And this raving nutter looks like one of their own

  30. 30
    Guzz says:

    Exeter’s top moron? Just leave little Ben Bradshaw out of it, OK? Otherwise a hissy fit’s guaranteed . . .

  31. 31
    Percy says:

    Maybe it’s those pesky badgers declaring war on our charming leaders for ordering the badger cull, as the first one seems to have been found out maybe they will be asking Geedoes IRA chums for advice

  32. 32
    Ah, the cast iron evidence says:

    I think Willy’s Napoleon complex has evident from the age of 15. He must be cumming in his pants 24/7 over all this geopolitiking and posturing.

    Let’s face it, he’s probably been wet dreaming of this for over 30 years.

  33. 33
    Percy says:

    Washing powder?

  34. 34
    Luigi and Luigi Papal Builders, Rome. says:

    The grant Dell’Unione Europea was a easy to get and no one a checked on the job

  35. 35
    Living in 97.222% white Merseyside says:

    Take the Ermine Tone!

    I’m sure Lady Blair will look great at the state opening of parliament.

  36. 36
    Percy says:

    Maybe they thought MPs would like to relive their public school and university days

  37. 37
    The EU is croques (de merde) monsieur says:

    Cocaine rots your brain. That could explain the IQ of many Liblabcon MPs.

  38. 38
    The MPs Pastoral Association says:

    Yes…scanned by dispensible interns.

  39. 39
    The only good MP is a dead MP says:

    No.

  40. 40
    Bomb the Fuckers says:

    Have to say. Blair does have a strange definition of “peace”.

  41. 41
    Tony Blair says:

    Kill! Crush! Destroy!

  42. 42
    Percy says:

    Well you have to admit young Willy has been doing his jobbie while Dave has spent his time on holiday

  43. 43
    Hear no Evil, See no Evil. says:

    He won’t take a Lording as that would mean having to declare his incomes and interests.

  44. 44
    poof watch says:

    It was Ben Bradshaw

  45. 45
    Axe The Telly Tax & Religion & Kill All Ecoloons says:

    Are they sure it wasn’t a BBC consignment from Colombia that got sent to the wrong address?

  46. 46
    Programmed to Accept says:

    So body building powder is not rejected by the mail room scanner. This says more about MPs habits at work than it does security.

  47. 47
    Axe The Telly Tax & Religion & Kill All Ecoloons says:

    Hague has morphed into Gollum and Cameron into Grima Wormtongue.

  48. 48
    oxy moron says:

    Blair and Peace are two words that should never share the same sentence.

  49. 49
    Percy says:

    Only a small border and the Syrians have other things on their minds at present

  50. 50
    Anonymous says:

    dave says…..’has mine arrived yet?’

    did he ever pass his vetting when working for lamont?

    hmmm!

  51. 51
    Percy says:

    Postage alone must have cost over £300

  52. 52
    JadedJean says:

    When the J e w ish homeland was first mooted, the British politician David Lloyd George implied that this act was in fact very similar to the tactic used by the Germans in 1917 in sending a disruptive force into Russia in order to cause trouble for Tsarist Russia and get them out of WWI, instead, in 1917 Palestine, Lloyd George said the target was Germany’s ally, the Ottoman Caliphate. Much later, in 1948, when David Ben Gurion declared UDI, General George Marshall advised Truman not to recognize Israel. Truman rejected the advice.

    Some might say that there was in fact some wisdom to that apparent act of madness, as what it showed the international community in later decades, was that a small group, which for centuries has fought against assimilation and persecution, for the advantages of being as small minority group granted asylum and settling amongst others, showed the world that all might be that it seemed, suggestion to some that this group may not have been ‘persecuted’ throughout the centuries, but censured for opportunistic, if not predatory behaviour at the expense of their neighbours. Many expected far better of Israel.

    Alas, all the evidence shows that censure doesn’t reduce the rate of reoffending, yet many naively live in hope. What we are witnessing, I suggest, is the incorrigible hypocrisy of pathological human narcissism, which always ends in tears.

  53. 53
    Afghanistan Banana Stand says:

    Kerry should do the right thing:

    Mash Bliar’s head into that wall

  54. 54
    EUROPEAN WAR CRIMES COURT says:

    Blair and Bush are two people that should share the same sentence.

  55. 55
    UN? says:

    I wonder who Blair is sticking his finger up to.

  56. 56
    EUROPEAN WAR CRIMES COURT says:

    Blair and Bush are two people that should share the same sentence.

    Should be in response to comment 52

  57. 57
    John Ward says:

    In the late hours of last night CET, Warplanes and military transporters have begun arriving at Britain’s Akrotiri airbase on Cyprus, less than 100 miles from the Syrian coast, in a sign of increasing preparations for a military strike against the Assad regime in Syria.
    “We want a UN inspection,” warbles William Hague, “But if we get one, our American allies will say it’ll be meaningless, so I’ll agree with them – thus contradicting what I told everyone six days ago. And I’ll slip them free use of our Cypriot base….without asking for anything in return, because I’m still ToryBoyum Consultantfukwiticas. God Bless Yorkshire and America”

  58. 58
    Well if Fatbott thinks it a bad idea then I may have to rethink my bad idea think says:

  59. 59
    Percy says:

    What would like to know is where do they get all those extra plods from on demonstrations, protests, etc but if you want one there is no one available or where I live if you see a copper using his legs walking around on patrol you have to blink several times in disbelief. A bobby walking about picks up more info about crims and potential crims and he deters any person who might do something he shouldn’t.

  60. 60
    Percy says:

    Dave that is known as a swagger stick

  61. 61
    Joe and Josie Public says:

    For the first time ever Fatbott is correct.

  62. 62
    Rightwinggit says:

    Exeter isn’t also known as excretia for nothing…

  63. 63
    John Kerry says:

    It was Assad! He has a caravan down there.

  64. 64
    The CIA says:

    We still have those pictures, Toryboy.

  65. 65
    Percy says:

    Not if the Syrians or their allies get to you first Tone, quite a few middle eastern gentlemen actually

  66. 66
    Percy says:

    Should be be for comment 45

  67. 67

    The anthrax from the last “real” anthrax attack was the Yanks own weaponised stuff/

  68. 68
    .Neil Hamilton - soon to be a senior figure in the suicide of UKIP says:

    I would have thought the last thing an MP would do is ring the police if he found a brown envelope.In the past they are usually stuffed with the green stuff not the white stuff.

  69. 69
    One Term Dave says:

    Are you related to Lurch from the Adamms Family?.

  70. 70
    More of the British Public says:

    Keep out of Syria you dimwits. Willy Vague for bumboy of the decade.

  71. 71
    All muzzies should be martyrs. says:

    Its a really bad idea but very profitable for some small band of the elite. Stop it now!.

  72. 72
    Liblabcon enemies of the English says:

    …our perceived interests

    I think you’ll find the interests of our elites and that of the native population have parted company long ago.

  73. 73
    Liblabcon enemies of the English says:

    The destabilisation of Syria by the FUKUS nations at the behest of globalists interests, is an almost carbon copy of what they did in Kosovo back in the late 90s.

    Funding, training and arming so-called ‘rebels’ to destabilise an area, with a lap dog media to spew the required lies to get the dumbed down masses on side, is almost becoming standard foreign policy for our compromised politicians.

  74. 74
    I say says:

    When did Jimmy tarbuck become Syrian Foreign Minister?

  75. 75
    Langley Loves You says:

    We’ve run all of them since 1956. Once we put you in your place over Suez it was decided that we could never again afford to have a British government that could go ‘rogue’ on us. It was easy really, most of your aspiring elite love lecture circuits, consultancies, think tanks etc.. We set up hundreds to groom every generation of British politician that looked like he might make it to the top. And if they didn’t get onside willingly they’d hang themselves with their little fetishes. Labour or Tory makes no odds we own them all when it comes down to it.

  76. 76
    God (a false one) says:

    Verily I say unto thee, Tone, me old mate, when you pick up this message on your prayer ansafone, that thou shouldst be OK-ing this one with me before thou speaketh.

    No worries though, cobber. I say KILL THEM! KILL THEM ALL!

    laterz dood.

  77. 77
    Tony Bliar says:

    Hi God. I think you meant to attach that to message 24 lol

    But it’s all cool, yeah. Let’s burn some more brown babies.

    Touch base when I’ve got a window, yeah?

  78. 78
    ANON says:

    ‘Ruining a nineteen year old intern’s day probably isn’t quite the anti-state sedition Exeter’s top moron had in mind…’

    This news story did not seem to get picked up in the national media.

    http://www.strathspey-herald.co.uk/News/Highland-man-jailed-for-downloading-information-to-make-explosive-device-15082013.htm

  79. 79
    Max Von Sydow says:

    Lady Blair would, as always, look like something out of the Exorcist.

  80. 80
    The Wild Colonial Boy says:

    It’s referred to as the Special Relationship. The former colonists are now the mother c*ntry and mother knows best.

  81. 81
    Penfold says:

    Most probably thought it was a free gift from their coke local pusher…..

  82. 82
    broderick crawford says:

    Office staff pretend manual worker is invisible

    Don’t look
    DESK staff at a Swindon company have studiously ignored a maintenance man.

    Sales operatives at the telesales firm took pains to not notice the man in overalls, neither greeting him or offering him a cup of tea.

    Team leader Tom Logan said: “If I speak to him people might think I know him, or worse still that we are somehow related.

    “He’s not like us. Look at him, he’s all leathery and he carries a little ladder around.

    “It’s like he’s from another dimension.

    “I bet his van is really disgusting, all littered with snotty tissue, crisp packets and unpaid parking tickets.”

    Administrator Mary Fisher agreed: “The key thing is not to make eye contact. Then he might speak to me, probably about chips or fighting, and I would have to ignore him.

    “One of the team brought in some doughnuts today, I hope he realises they aren’t for him. I don’t want his greasy hands touching them.”

    The office workers refused to comment on speculation that the maintenance man earns twice as much as they do.

  83. 83
    broderick crawford says:

    RECALL OF PARLIAMENT SAYS ;;;

    David Cameron …… is …. in the ….. building .

  84. 84
    broderick crawford says:

    So to what good use are you puttingyour panties Sam ??

    Using them as refugee blankets to house those 500 or so badgers that manage to escape the upcoming cull ??

  85. 85
    broderick crawford says:

    yes they do !!!

    they unfailingly provide you with an insurance reference number ….. by phone !!

  86. 86
    broderick crawford says:

    whaddah do yoo esspect sir william .

    we were good builders n italy during the renaissance but then the italian economic miracle happened and now the mafia control the building materials trade and they always supply sub standard goods at top dollar prices .

    goodah way to maykah money no ???

    ( sorry we cannot use mafia word because it officially doesn’t exist ?— so substitute camorra , n draghetoa , sacra corona unita … your choice ok??)

  87. 87
    broderick crawford says:

    PAUL TEMPLE SAYS TO PAUL WAUGH :

    By Timothy Waugh … I think you’re right !!!

  88. 88
    broderick crawford says:

    you 419 rookie !!

    you forgot to ask for my bank details and the cv number on the back of my debit card !

    do they teach you nothing at the sahel sub saharan school,of grifting these
    days ???!!!

  89. 89
    broderick crawford says:

    indeed .

    and one wonders what a smidgeon of cochineal dye can do to the humble beetroot ?

  90. 90
    broderick crawford says:

    don’t forget he’s got past form with BBC.

    i am of course referring to his erstwhile employment by our venerated national broadcaster .

    ( whatever were you thinking ??!!!)

  91. 91
    broderick crawford says:

    GOD S OWN COUNTRY BILL ….AMERICA NOT YORKSHIRE !! … AT LEAST
    NOT SINCE FRED TRUMAN PASSED?

  92. 92
    NEVER LET A DAGO BYE says:

    FFS if you’re gonna pull a stunt that will get you caught , and could land you inside for 10 years , you might as well send them the real stuff

  93. 93
    Luke Indamirror says:

    Maybe they were influenced by glorification of terrorism eg. naming a website after the bloke who tried to blow up Parliament…


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