August 25th, 2013

Coulson’s Mobile Phone Conversation Intercepted


A co-conspirator emailed on Friday:

Yesterday, I found myself walking up the Gray’s Inn Road alongside Andy Coulson. He was talking on his mobile phone to someone about the fact that his trial date had been moved. It was raining and he was mumbling a lot. But I did catch this brilliant quote:

“Whatever you do, don’t share that with anyone. Be very careful.”

I couldn’t resist papping him as he ambled along the road.

A funny thing to hear from the man who stands accused of conspiracy to intercept mobile phone voicemails, among other things. Be more careful Andy…


  1. 1
    Andrew says:

    Frankly, Guido, this is not worth reporting unless you know what he was hiding and to whom he was confiding it.


    • 5
      a doctor says:

      applied CAREFULLY and CONIDENTIALLY a rectal suppository can be most efficacious

      and is not in great demand for sharing


      • 106
        Nobby Pickens says:

        That photo could be of any old tart. Why isn’t it chucking down, then?


        • 120
          anon says:

          I have a full-frontal pap of Ed Miliband not yet losing at Jenga, dear. I may have to retrieve it from Tinker’s litter tray, though.


        • 124
          blah.....It was raining.....blah.... says:

          Maybe he Photoshopped-out the rain. People do seem to have excess time on their hands.


    • 7

      This advice is derived from you having the most successful blog in Britain is it Andrew?


    • 15
      A Young Lady from Ealing says:

      “I couldn’t resist papping him as he ambled along the road.”

      What does “papping him” mean?


      • 18
        john in cheshire says:

        Could it be a shortened form of Paparazzi, hence the photo?


        • 59
          Anonymous says:

          nullThe photo could be of anybody ! i mean FFS why take a pic of somebodys back ?


          • Point of Infromation 4 says:

            ‘FFS why take a pic of somebodys back’ ?

            Perhaps because it is Andy Coulson ?

            Same argument can be leveled at alleged pictures of chemical weapons victims in Syr!a.

            FFS: They may just be pretending to be dead, may not even be in Syr!a, may have died of something else… etc.

            Still, looks like Coulson and I trust Guido to check his sources.


          • Cornish Pilchard says:

            Pippa Middleton’s back is regularly;y photographed


          • broderick crawford says:

            perhaps he was taken with the small and perfectly formed symmetry of the alleged andrew’s rear nether regions

            wasn’t ahorsetrainer by any chance …. living in the cotswolds ?


          • Percy says:

            I don’t know the guy but from the pictures a year ago (remand time) if it is Coulson, he has put a lot weight and a lot it on his shoulders, could be the rear end of PS could be anyone


      • 20
        The Dictionary in Google search says:


        1. soft food for infants or invalids, as bread soaked in milk.

        2. ideas, writings, or the like, lacking substance or real value

        1. Midland U.S. A teat or nipple.

        2. Something resembling a nipple

        So he either sucked his nipple, showed him something lacking in value or gave him some baby food.


      • 38
        Horn honker says:

        Tooting to you from Ealing.


      • 48
        Mine d'Boggles says:

        It is probably a mis-spelling of “pooping”, as in “pooping on him”….


      • 261
        Herr S. Fry says:

        I could tell you, but you would probably vomit.


      • 328
        Kateesh'a says:

        Its udder-related .


    • 69
      Lard Pressclott of Beams, Bellies, Banjos, Bulimia, two bog seats, two Jags & Shags. says:

      Was he talking about pies ?


    • 103
      broderick crawford says:

      well…. grays inn road and theobalds road arethe fulcrum of the famous grays inn one of the great london inns of court .
      so the hypothesis could be he had just finalised a consultation with his barrister domiciled in the rabbitwarren of legal chambers housed in grays inn itself and jockeys fields adjacent . the legal eagle had phoned andy pandy to inform him of an aspect that had just come to light or had not been covered in aforementioned pow wow .

      at which point anders issued the overheard supplication to silence and omerta’ .



      • 178
        Anonymous says:

        Wouldnt it be great if it was decided not to proceed with the case because of Sallyesque comment on twitter by that well known motor mouth .Lily Allen.


    • 298
      Jimmy says:

      You miss the point. Guido is trying to create the impression that he is prepared to be disloyal to a Murdoch minion without actually saying anything of substance.


      • 300
        The Mad Bitch of Buenos Aires says:

        Good one!

        Except the “minion” left Murdoch’s employ some years earlier. Otherwise, nice try.


      • 312

        Jimmy you’re like one of those internet conspiracy theorists who hang out in blog comments…


        • 316
          Jimmy says:

          Your sucking up to the digger is a conspiracy theory? Considering some of your tinfoil tinged “scoops” that’s a bit rich.


          • You love it, it keeps you coming back for more.


          • Percy says:

            I hate to butt in your you personal spat you two but Murdoch probably has an interest in this blog at least for the time being, so what do want Geedes to do, he is always advertising on here his column in the Sun on Sunday. The Geedes is not a journo but he would dearly like to be one or even a politico, good luck to him if that is what he wants, at the moment he/they will probably always be known as that blogger chap.


          • It used to be a common theme when this blog started that Guido was a thwarted politician. After the expenses scandal people realised being an MP, under constant scrutiny and paid less than Neo-Guido, is a shit life. Journalists are being made redundant left, right and centre when not being arrested. Why would Guido want to be an underpaid employee? Being a blogger is a bit like being a journalist only better paid and with more job security. Don’t forget Guido owns the blog and all the advertising revenue. Don’t get Guido wrong, we love having the most read political column in the most read newspaper as well as the most read political blog. It is not just the money, the girls and the influence. It is the sheer freedom to be able to say “fuck you” to anyone we like from the PM down and they know it. It gives me more joy than you can believe to know that we drove Gordon Brown madder when he read the blog in Number 10. Priceless.


          • Jimmy says:

            Touched a nerve there. You’ll be posting a picture of your car next.


          • Just setting the record straight.


    • 314
      Cast-Iron Guarantee says:

      If Guido had bothered to check out that docking station he might deduce it’s just a very short walk from St Mungo’s. Much better story.


    • 338
      broderick crawford says:

      JEREMY Paxman is to present Newsnight dressed as a black man as he seeks an above inflation pay rise from the BBC.

      Paxman believes he can increase his £1 million a year salary by applying shoe polish to his face and interviewing politicians while impersonating the late Al Jolson.

      He told an audience at the Edinburgh Television Festival: “Most news readers these days are black women.

      “Trevor McDonald, George whatshisface, the guy that does News 24 on Sunday afternoons and, of course, Hugh Edwards.

      “Alright Hugh Edwards isn’t a black woman, but he is Welsh which is basically the same thing.”

      Media analyst Tom Logan said: “Jeremy Paxman has raised an important issue: Why the fuck is anyone still listening to this arsehole?

      “People seem to think he’s deep and intelligent because he asked Michael Howard if he threatened to overrule the head of the prison service 600 times in a row. I still reckon he was pissed.”

      Logan added: “If he’s not defiling University Challenge he’s writing to Marks and Sparks about his testicles like some kind of pervert freak.

      “And another thing, who the fuck keeps asking Jeremy Paxman to write books? I want names.”


    • 339
      The Mad Muller (Cameroon) says:

      Launch the missles now, birmingham and leicester must be destroyed, once we evaucate londonistan we can continue.
      I thank you.


    • 340
      Cannibal Leader Of the chemical attack brigade of jihadist martyrs says:

      Invade Syria now.


  2. 2

    What are next week’s lottery numbers, though?


  3. 3
    Lily Allen, on Twitter says:

    See ???? GUILTY!


  4. 4
    Chelsea Manning says:

    So the Syrians have agreed to let the UN weapons inspectors into the area of the ‘alleged’ chemical weapons attack. Remember how Obum boy and Cuuntermon were demanding this?

    Well know the Syrians have agreed the Tory cuunts and Obum bandit are now saying that it’s too late.

    This is being reported by Sky and the BBC without question, even though weapons experts THEY themselves have interviewed have stated evidence can last for years.

    The frog cuunts also stating that there is a pile of evidence against Assad. So where is it then? and where is the media checking these claims out?

    You’d think that there would be hundreds of western hacks heading to Syria to investigate and loads of rebel groups willing to show them.

    Yet there’s nothing, not a dicky bird.

    Cuuntermon, you should stick to finding out who *illy Hague was shagging in his hotel room and leave the world in peace.

    you really are fucked for 2015.


    • 10
      Fuck the EU says:

      Bomb France and Spain.

      Send in the Labour front bench on an unarmed fact finder to Syr!a.

      Vote UKIP.


      • 19
        Axe The Telly Tax & Religion & Kill All Ecoloons says:

        Send all the beeboid bumboys and SKY scum journalists, into the middle of the Syrian Alky Ada controlled areas, with a gun, and lets see how brave and mouthy they are!


        • 25
          Owen Jones reporting for duty says:

          I have a missile shaped willy and I like cruising down built up areas at night.


        • 37
          The BBC causes serious mental illness says:

          Should get some impartial journo’s in, but recall the old maxim about ‘Not shooting the messenger.’

          Those who are writing the script and paying them to compromise their integrity for sure should be sent in. The BBC do need their numbers thinned.


        • 90
          Anonymous says:

          Can we send Allan,Glenn and Miranda as well, please ?


      • 61
        Anonymous says:

        fuck the eu, i have a better idea send nigel and the bongo bongo land man.They are expendable.


        • 63
          Fuck the EU says:

          No way to speak the potential future leaders of the UK.

          Out with the old, in with the new.


          • Hot Favourite says:

            He’s still 80/1 with Paddy Power.
            Get your money on him now, before that plummets.


          • Percy says:

            Nige has just to do his gurning act and the Assad regime will tumble send him out, it will either make him or break him


    • 22
      I d on't n eed no d octor says:

      Chelsea you fuckwit, the Assad regime will have planted evidence that incriminates the rebels. Why didn’t the Assad allow the inspectors in straight away?


      • 34
        The British Public says:

        I don’t care what the answer to that it, but if you think it is interesting, why don’t you go there yourself and ask.


      • 54
        Our EU membership fee: 20 billion reasons to vote UKIP says:

        “Why didn’t the Assad allow the inspectors in straight away?”

        I was wondering that, and I came up with the reasonable answer: it’s a warzone. Maybe Assad wasn’t too keen on a bunch of UN weapons inspectors getting shot by rebels who could be dressed as regular Syrian troops.

        So, maybe Assad was/is just trying to ensure the area’s safe.

        What I want to know, though, is what sort of chemical it was, because reports say 3,500 injured arrived at hospital. Injured? They should be dead. Pretty crappy nerve agents if you ask me. Sounds like someone got cheap ones off the Internet from China.


        • 87
          Blur Witch Project : Chilcot Redux says:

          Or perhaps have fingered one which the public are familiar with to make the propaganda more credible.


      • 78
        Chelsea Manning says:

        Oh the old Assad planted the stuff. Well of course, that’s the media’s natural reaction. You don’t think that professional investigators would be able to see through that?

        Or is it a case of who cares just bomb the bastard?


    • 32
      The British Public says:

      Syria is none of our business


    • 44
      Toenails says:

      If they can detect drugs in Athletes, pilots, surgeons etc 6 months down the line by taking hair and toenail samples I think it reasonable that they could do the same with a nerve agent.


    • 60
      Anonymous says:

      Im getting very concerned at your obsession with william Hague ! you really do need to get out more and make some friends of your own age. You must also learn to speak normally, most people will chin you if you eff and jeff like you do on here in real life.You inadequate little prick.


      • 68
        Propaganda Watch says:

        Good point their AN: Some more detail would be good:

        This smells like a Clifford / Labour smear.

        Unless Hague was with a minor, a foreign agent, or perhaps had committed a criminal offense either with or against the other party, there is nothing in the public interest about who he shares a room with.


      • 226
        Blowing Whistles says:

        Did someone mention William the very Vague of scraping the bottom of the barrel to look impotent ‘cos I was just reading the telegraph of today an article entitled United they stand – divided they fall?

        Here’s a snippet:-

        Mention the prospect of a second coalition between the Tories and the Lib Dems to Bob Wollard, and the response is deafening. “The very talk of it is thoroughly ghastly,” roars Mr Wollard, who earlier this year founded the Conservative Grassroots movement to oppose the Government’s same-sex marriage legislation.

        “The Lib Dem tail has been wagging the Conservative dog in this coalition …”

        The reason i mention it here is because of the film Wag the Dog – where journalists are fed diktats by government spokespersons and a false flag is played out … Its a classic film.

        btw the article was opposite some kweer looking fucker promoting himself again.


    • 122
      broderick crawford says:

      if bradley manning has now turned into chelsea does that mean billy and hilly s daughter is now re named bradley clinton??


  5. 6
    Chelsea Manning says:

    Any weapons inspectors turned up dead today?


  6. 8
    Mr & Mrs Jones says:

    Mr & Mrs Jones fury at pop star – “my teen son,Owen, saw Cheryl Cole’s bum tattoo and now he won’t stop masturbating over my curtains.”


  7. 9
    I'm a gonna'ere says:

    Was it a conversation about a STD’s?


  8. 12
    Demagogue says:

    “It was raining and he was mumbling a lot.”
    From the picture, it doesn’t look like it was raining – this is all pure fiction. move on.


    • 129
      broderick crawford says:

      Rainfall is relative and thus depends on ones psychic state at the time as to whether it can be noted or perceived in the great ether of existence …. as Schopenhauer would not have said .

      Ones psychic and indeed mental and emotional state in turn depends on how many triple absynthes you have managed to down before stumbling out of the duke of york pub at 12.30 pm on the given day and perceiving torrential rainfall which to all others may have been oerceived as hot , humid and dry


  9. 13
    Casual Observer says:

    This Thursday, the 29th, could be the day…


    • 14
      Casual Observer says:

      Should qualify that Monday will be notice day, Tuesday the reckoning, and Thursday the affirmation.

      What happens Wednesday is anyone’s guess :-)


    • 29
      Z o'Randzam says:

      Suppose they gave a war and nobody came ?


      • 136
        broderick crawford says:

        ” giving ” a war ?

        wot .. you mean .. like ….. in …. ” giving ” a party ??


        • 149
          Mr main wearing says:

          Might happen if they are all down picking up their social fags and diamond white n’stuff


    • 40
      What's Important Is says:

      … the day they bring the inflated prices in the wine section in Sainsbury’s back down and pretend to have a sale?


      • 50
        Anonymous says:

        No price integrity there – those rob-dog rats!


      • 76
        Lady Shopper says:

        Tesco are worse. You know those Clubcard vouchers they send out? Tesco put the prices up just before they send them to you.

        For example: 1ltr bottle of Harvey’s Bristol Cream was £10. The vouchers arrived – including one for £1.80 off a 1ltr bottle of HBC. Off I went to Tesco and low and f*cking behold, it’s on the shelf at £11.80.


        • 100
          Con, con, and con again says:

          Tesco’s, the shop for halfwits.


          • Londoner says:

            You think they are bad in the UK? Somewhere on one of my mobiles I have a picture of a bottle of ‘French Whisky’ that they had put on sale in one of their Chinese stores.


        • 107
          East of Suez says:

          This the is t kind of thing that I expect Dave to sort out. Instead he is making empty threats to some guy in Syria about matters that should be none of his business.


          • Lady Shopper says:


            Before last Christmas, my Tesco had a big promotion – right in the front of the store – for Gordon’s gin, 1ltr.

            They claimed it was “on offer” at £14, “reduced from £21″.

            Which was odd, because I’d bought a bottle there a week earlier for £16.

            They take their customers for mugs; I don’t shop there much, now.


        • 191
          Anonymous says:

          It’s true.

          Tesco used to be good value for money but now they’re mostly a rip-off. I go there far less than I used to.


        • 210
          Anonymous says:

          Tesco – another bunch of cheeky pirates!

          That “Brand Match” bullshit at Sainsbury’s is the biggest f*cking deception going (pardon my profane language), you know the one – the stitch up (or false rivalry) between themselves, Asda and Tesco, which doesn’t include Waitrose. The other day, I came across an item in Sainsbury’s where the price had been hiked to two-and-a-half times the price of the same item in Waitrose (previously pegged to the Waitrose price) and then marked down as a “one-third off” deal. Ruddy rob-dogs!


        • 269
          Middle-class piss head says:

          It’s not just Tesco, it’s everyCo.

          For example, Barefoot do a lovely cheeky Merlot which Tesco now sells at £6.99, but so do everyone else except for Bargainbooze who sell it at £11 for 2, i.e. £5.50.


  10. 16
    Axe The Telly Tax & Religion & Kill All Ecoloons says:

    You can hear the laughter echoing from Moscow and Peking as O’Barmy, Camermong & Hollandaise make complete fools of themselves.


  11. 21
    Chief Petty arsehole Bryant says:

    I will only volunteer to serve on the HMS Westminster if I can be in charge of dispensing plenty of Rum,Bum and the Lash


  12. 23
    Chuka De Carnival says:


    • 26
      I d on't n eed no d octor says:



    • 28
      Millionaire concerned abot the price of Goat Curry says:


      • 33
        Every little helps says:

        Got to say that is expensive. 95p in Tesco.


      • 39
        I d on't n eed no d octor says:

        Abbott is a jerk, mind you so are all the other members of labours front bench.


        • 88
          Owen Jones says:

          Is jerk chicken the same as choked?


          • broderick crawford says:

            yes similar to lobster where the chef picks your selected lobster from a cold water tank and places it live in a cauldron of boiling water .

            with the chicken you select from the hens padding around the hen coop in th back yard and the chef then strangles it and cooks it fresh to your liking.

            whether he de feathers it and/or takes out its entrails prior to doing so depends on local custom in the country concned and the degree of perceived machismo in the population .


      • 70
        Could we be so lucky? says:

        “Campylobacter [bacteria in most chicken sold in the UK] is estimated to cause 300,000 cases of food poisoning annually. While a number of newspaper reports today described it as a “deadly bug”, only around 70 of these cases are fatal each year.”

        Oh, please, please please please please..


        • 77
          Dave ( Dr Strangelove ) Cameron says:

          that’ll be the Edwina Curry Chicken meal


        • 143
          broderick crawford says:

          yes it is indeed sad that only 70 percent are fatal .

          Given this virus a affects only the very cheap cuts bought mainly from remaindered somerfield stock sold on to pound stores aft expiry date and bought by chavs , unwaged , single mothers , benefit fraudsters and other ne’er do wells we should really try to work towards a 100 percebt efficacy result .


        • 233
          Blowing Whistles says:

          It’s not so much chickens as the complete rabble of Turkeys we have that front up as politicians in this country. They’d vote for Christmas if they were told to.


      • 73
        Ed Balls - Shallow Chancer says:

        Prices are up because of this Government’s failed economic policies. Under my stewardship, everything will come down: our Gold Bullion reserves, house prices, job prospects, the value of the Pound and our currency reserves.


      • 119
        Lord Ed of Pwimwose Hiwl says:

        Gold old English fare.


      • 242
        Putrid Giblets says:

        Chuka’s your ideal man to jerk off a chicken.


    • 272
      po' ol' whitey says:

      Ethnic Cleansing in Notting Hill


  13. 24
    I d on't n eed no d octor says:

    It was Mrs Coulson that he was talking to, and he was on about a chocolate cake, it’s Andy’s favourite.


  14. 41
    Blame the Ice Age says:

    Fracking Hell, Glaciers cause Blackpool to Rock

    Two earthquakes shake homes in Blackpool


    • 157
      broderick crawford says:

      well gideon and carney should be pleased .

      with current forward projection obliterating most of the north west of the kingdom by end 2014 it will set ozzie up nicely for an election splurge on a new housebuildin programme in the newly devastated northwest and carney can increase interest rates coz the unemployment total will have dived coz a substantial quantity will have expired .

      large triples all round .


  15. 43
    Right That's it. says:

    David Cameron to give Syria ultimatum

    And then what will he do?


  16. 52
    Andy Coulson says:

    I’m just glad they didn’t record me on the sex lines!


    • 56
      John Prescott says:

      What deference wood it make anyway if you were on the sex lines and having a go theres nothing wrong with it if its all in a good cause i was once on their as a sexy fat madame all for the mariners charity and we raised a few bob and anyway its part of the Big Society changes that Ed (Special Needs) is going to announce in the Age of Chancers which follows on from Tony and Gordon but keep it away from Ed Balls-up because we dont want it leaking just yet as the plan is still at the blueprinter stage even so we’re bilking a new society that will be in the finesse Labour traditional so all you suthern jessies can go do one!


      • 92
        Tay King-dePisse says:

        Your Lordship– and I humour you with that style– haven’t you got a chinks nearby that you can put out of business for the evening, and spare us any more of your eructations?


        • 334
          John Prescott says:

          Now listen you posh little twit I was working as a ferry steward before you were even born or thought of so dont come it with me with your high falutin disdayn and all that palarva because its for the security that Im doing this so any more daft questions?


  17. 57
    Tories prepare for snap election says:

    Yes, it’s time for a war in Syria.


    • 66
      Our EU membership fee: 20 billion reasons to vote UKIP says:

      So, slightly off topic, was Tony Blair really the best person to land the job of Middle East Peace Envoy?

      I can’t help thinking it’s not working out as it should be.


  18. 58
    Dave ( Dr Strangelove ) Cameron says:

    cardiff 2 Man C 1


  19. 79
    Major Bumsore says:

    So, is Dave ‘Gay Marriage’ Cameron going to be leading from the front or the rear on Syr!a ?


  20. 81
    Gordon Brown Mk1 Dumb Bomb says:

    Drop me on Syria I’ll destroy their economic infrastructure.


  21. 82
    Living in 97.222% white Merseyside says:

    Talking of Andy Coulson I didn’t buy the Current Bun today.


    • 96
      Chelsea Manning says:

      BBC have a weekly update on Sunday morning about banning Page 3. I suspect none of the females at the BBC could get a job on Page 3.

      Nikki Campbell would like to be on Page 3 in the Gay Times though.


  22. 86
    Gaye Mann (Mrs) says:

    There’s scraping the bottom of the barrel, and then there’s this. Dear, oh dear. Does the Digger insist all the good stuff is kept just for the Current Bun?


  23. 91
    DAVE Fuckwit CAMERMONG says:

    Biggest baby boom for over 40 years , not enough midwives to cope !
    Never mind midwives , Who the fuck is supposed to pay for all these bastards ?

    Oh i forgot we will !


    • 299
      Miranda Hart-Dyke, not the Miranda you've been reading so much about lately, says:

      “…[N]ot enough midwives…”

      Oh no, you ain’ gittin’ me t’ do it!
      Ah jus’ plays one on the telly, ‘s all!
      Ah don’ knows nuthin’ ’bout birthin’ no babies!


  24. 93
    G'day cobbers, it's Lynton Cosby here says:

    Focus groups from key marginals suggest that coffins draped with the Union Flag plus Dave and SamCam comforting bereaved parents at military funerals could be worth 5% at the polls.

    The bonus is this is drawing votes mainly from UKIP, showing cold steel to the fuzzie-wuzzies has 100% approval.

    Ed has no-where to go on this one, we think he’ll come over as an appeaser like Kinnock.

    The only problem is the BBC surrender monkeys, but will invoke enabling powers to force then to carry Dave’s nightly broadcast.



  25. 94
    Chelsea Manning says:

    Willy Hague just been on TV spouting more fucking lies about Syria. Fuck off and go bum your boyfriend you Tory twat.


    • 101
      I d on't n eed no d octor says:

      Chelsea, piss off you dumb person.


      • 183
        Anonymous says:

        William Hague seems fascinate a lot of people on here, i think they are jealous. He is very bright and they arent !


        • 190
          A Taxpayer says:

          He costs us a packet. On top of his huge salary, his expenses were £94,913.16 in the financial year 2011-12 – which were lower than they would have been because he also gets the run of a grace-and-favour mansion in Kent and the public don’t get to know what that little number costs us.


        • 240
          Blowing Whistles says:

          He is Margaret Beckett reincarnated.


  26. 105
    Chuka ( you can call me Harrison ) Urmunneyaround says:

    Two British tourists, Modupe Idowu and Esther Jubril Badmos, trapped in China. Try and find those names in the Domesday Book.


    • 114
      Mr Angry with the UK's lack of immigration policy or control says:


      They weren’t tourists either. On some dodgy business thing trying to rip the Chinks off.

      I trust they will be deported to country of original Origin, saving us the time, cost and trouble of the British courts and the human rites Lawyers.


    • 115
      Gladioli or bust says:

      It must be very annoying not being able to kick off when you don’t get your own way and then accuse everyone of racism.

      In the many times I have been going to China I have never received anything but courtesy from people trying to sell me things, even when there have been misunderstandings and language barriers.

      I think there is something about this story we have not been told.


      • 254
        Wacist Bob says:

        I think it’s a simple case of – that’s what happens when you play the racist card in China.


    • 182
      Notting Hill Resident says:

      Africans disturbing the peace? Shurely shome mishtake?


    • 250
      Joe says:

      They’re NOT British so Fuck ‘em.



    • 253
      Wacist Bob says:

      I’m sure the chinks could put them in a zoo or something then all the chinky kids could go look at them on their school trips and be taught the dangers of multiculturalism and diversity.

      Just a thought.


    • 256
      Wacist Wodger says:

      I believe they call it Chimping out?


    • 276
      Harold Godwinson says:

      em i britiz?

      uz moz be jokin mun!


    • 306
      Lord Sasserides says:

      The slopes should eviscerate the fuckers and make the world a better place.


  27. 112

    I am in a village whose cricket green is home to the oldest cricket club in Hampshire. It is a delightful sunny afternoon after a rather cloudy start and the only thing which has marred my visit has been the need to buy diesel at 40% more than I paid last week.

    If the money were being spent wisely, one might suffer it but that is not the case.


    • 116
      nellnewman says:

      I’m not sure SC that village cricket is allowed under labour’s health and safety laws anymore. that cricket ball is very hard you know if it hits some on the head, especially if that someone is dumb enough not to duck out of the way!!


      • 127

        @nell, since I have been back in the UK for my short visit, the combination of three words have been quoted with obvious disdain by almost everyone I have met.

        Those words are health and safety.

        I cannot think of any clearer example of why the UK cannot claim to be a democratic country when such unwanted legislation is thrust upon us and the effect of which is not to promote the intended cause but rather to employ deadbeats who can then lord it over more hard working and talented people whilst simultaneously and unnecessarily raising their cost of living..


        • 144
          just a few miles away says:

          I’m on my way down to give you a good fucking kicking.


        • 284
          Large Breasts in Middle England says:

          There is a thesis to be written on the impact that multi-culti has had on the traditional English village rosy cheeked buxom lass.

          Large breasted English women of good farming stock, with the perfect set for serving saucy pub lunches and pints have I fear been greatly affected by the mass immigration campaign.

          This should be reported as a genocide.

          Bring back large breasts and rosy cheeks.

          Vote UKIP.


      • 174
        Lord Cutglass says:

        Oh an English village just before a war!

        Is there still honey for tea and is the clock stuck on ten to three?

        And as for that pub do they still sell Bombadier?


    • 128
      Elsie Beattie (83 and a quarter) says:

      No you are not, dear. You are sitting in your darkened room, surrounded by computers that have their own monikers, typing strange comments to that kind Mr. Fawkes’ internet weblog.


  28. 118
    nellnewman says:

    So where is andyburnham, the last labour government’s, Minister of Death and now apparently the Heir Apparent to militwit when labour finally work up enough courage to stab militwit in the back?

    Et Tu Brute?

    I don’t think so!!


    • 123
      Tony Blair's Shredder says:

      If he takes over, it will be the first time a Labour leader has been deserving of punishment for crimes against humanity since the last time.


      • 163
        Lip dick says:

        Burnham was just on sky news demanding Cameron invades Syria. What is it with leftie twats and picking fights


    • 187
      Anonymous says:

      Surely Andy isnt a credible replacement for Milliband, especially with the Stafford debacle hanging over him ?


  29. 145
    A Reader says:

    Guide, someone else said this earlier, but I have to endorse their view: your site seems to be unstable. Maybe you have too many adverts running or something.


    • 161
      Another Reader says:

      Definitely. It’s become unusable on Opera and fairly unusable on Firefox (Windows and Android).

      I try to avoid Chrome because blocking the adverts is harder. And as For IE, well.. dunno.


      • 223
        Universal Hiss says:

        It’s all been fine here since that Welsh lunatic departed.

        I’m still using XP(hate Vista & Windows 8) with Firefox & their wonderful Ad block.


      • 249
        Blowing Whistles says:

        The NSA and GCHQ – “DON’T LIKE IT UP EM” – fucking spooks chasing their own fucking tails.


  30. 148
    Lost in Clacton says:

    Guido Fawkes now a witness for the Prosecution.

    Well I never!


  31. 153
    Max Harris says:

    I trust that this Government is doing all that is necessary to increase prison places whilst maintaining its promise to reduce expense to the taxpayer by 20%.

    A lot of people are walking around our streets who are going to be found guilty very soon.

    A lot of money could be saved by putting one of those new non commissioned non nuclear aircraft carriers up the Thames and converted into a floating prison. Prison menus could be simplified by non multiple choices at meal times plus the raising of fees for prison visits.

    Where there is a will, there is a way.


    • 159
      A Modest Proposal says:

      Just keep the prisoners in their cells or at work and open the fabulous sports facilities at the prisons at prime locations like Holloway to the general public. These are already built and should turn a tidy profit instead of being a drain on the taxpayer.


      • 167
        Another modest proposal says:

        Just shoot the prisoners.

        Retrospectively, starting with Chris Huhne and David Laws.

        (I know David Laws wasn’t jailed for stealing £50,000 from us, but he f*cking well should have been. And then shot).


        • 169
          Yvonne from the Colliers Arms Clydach says:

          And to think this man is involved in the education of our children.

          That is really sickening.


        • 194
          Saki says:

          There are a few people in prison for things that probably shouldn’t be crimes, so I you won’t mind if I respectfully disagree.


    • 308
      The tit soon to be booted out of no. 10 says:

      Where there is a will there is a bequest to my party.


  32. 162
    UKID DING says:


    • 170
      So far this year, Dave has squandered £12,978,308,942.16 on our EU membership. says:

      Labour set for a 76-seat majority.

      Poor Dimmy Dave! Do you think the embarrassing figure in my moniker might be part of the problem? I do.

      Wave bye bye to poor Dimmy Dave! “Bye bye, Dimmy Dave! Bye bye!”


      • 173
        Democracy Now says:

        Only because the electoral system is rigged so one vote in Scotland is the same as five votes in England.


        • 179
          So far this year, Dave has squandered £12,978,915,651.95 on our EU membership. says:

          Yeah. Might not have been such a good idea for Dimmy Dave Camoron and his chums to call Conservatives “swivel eyed loons”, eh?

          Well, Dimmy Dave knew what he was doing.

          76 seats. Wow.

          As I said, “Bye bye Dimmy Dave!”


      • 177
        So far this year, Dave has squandered £12,978,787,855.15 on our EU membership. says:

        Oh, and so far this year, Dave has squandered £7,138,317,024.04 on foreign aid. To countries with space programmes and nuclear weapons.

        Shame. Our military might have needed some of it.

        But Dave knew best. “We face no wars for ten years”, Dave said, in 2010, as he scrapped our military.

        Clever Dimmy Dave!


      • 180
        UKID DING says:

        A 76 seat Labour majority would produce precisely ZERO Ukip MPs.

        Vote Ukip, get Red Ed.


        • 185
          England says:

          Then Dave should pull his fucking finger out of his backside and reform the political system to make ‘one man one vote’ mean precisely that.

          That includes the immediate repeal of the Parliamentary Voting System and Constituencies Act 2011 which protect both Na h-Eileanan an Iar and Orkney and Shetland from being added to any other constituencies.


      • 189
        Anonymous says:

        I wish you would stop being so inane, except for your posts its been good on here this afternoon. You are a Fecking half wit.


      • 205
        Anonymous says:

        The postal voting system – in its current form – needs scrapping.

        Scrap it and start again.

        Stop the postal voting fraud NOW. Right NOW, I tell thee!


    • 171
      The British Public says:

      They aren’t gaffes. The MSM just don’t understand. What are being heard are some of the voices and views that they normally pretend don’t exist.

      Ironically, it is ‘diversity’, something they claim to ‘celebrate’ at the Guardian but actually fear.


    • 213
      Anonymous says:

      I don’t know what this bollocks is all about; UKIP have been having a rather good summer – they’ve been setting the agenda! Say it ain’t true.


    • 278
      The Troo Brits says:

      UKIP ain’t perfect

      but they are a fcuk sight better than the other shite-fer-brains parties.

      Vote UKIP and vote for liberty.


  33. 165
    Major McTitmus Smythe KFC VD and scar says:

    Before we go to war is not the usual preparation a dodgy dossier and someone in the UN council showing stuff off the Internet like Tone did.


  34. 168
    The blue Skoda in the carpark says:

    Looking at that photo is appears that someone has shit upon Andy Coulson from a great height.

    I wonder who?


  35. 172
  36. 195
    Bongo says:

    What’s with the latest trend in adverts showing a black man / white woman couple.

    Halifax, some furniture company. etc.

    Are we being indoctrinated into thinking this is the norm ?


    • 199
      SCS says:

      Furniture?? We sell finance and boxwood.


    • 209
      Telly Watch says:

      Perhaps the advertisers have been watching a bit too much interracial p0rn.

      It is not normal, nor is it healthy.


    • 211
      New Improved Answer says:

      Such couples do exist. Just not as much as they do in the imaginings of the ‘creatives’ in the advertising industry.

      I expect there will be a re-appraisal in the end – all of these fads die a death eventually.


    • 215
      Bigoted Answer says:

      Good question. Has minimum wage gone up ?


    • 222
      Fat Waaah says:

      Don’t see too many with a brown man in PJs and a white woman all dolled up.


      • 264
        The advertising and reeducation industry says:

        Indeed, we need more of them in adverts otherwise it would be totally racist and we don’t want anyone to think we are racists because we’re not at all racist in any way shape or form.


    • 307
      A Pissed Off non celebrating no diversity says:



  37. 198
    Ahead of the Game says:

    Andrew Rawnsley was back in The Observer (my caps) today, I see. No need to buy it though – I got my Economist on Friday.


  38. 201
  39. 217
    Universal Hiss says:

    I’ve just been reading this…

    Wonder if Cat’s been there?


  40. 220
    By Gum you are making it all a bit to Obvious Mr Hague says:

    Eeh by gum.

    This war with Assad is planned and they don’t want it cancelled.

    Hague has been mithering like a schoolgirl for days demanding that he can have a look and see for himself and now when told he can he has a hissy fit and throws his toys out of the pram, saying it’s too late to see anything useful now, you’ve gone and ruined my plan.

    Violet Elizabeth Bott was more mature than Hague.


  41. 221
    Incapable Vince, deputy Chief Cockroach says:



    • 258
      Blowing Whistles says:

      Its old but I am going to repeat it:

      Mark Twain – “The mere mention of the word lawyer is enough to deprive a man of all public confidence”.

      legal experts – Proficient commissioned liars who dare not take the stand to testify on oath.


    • 263
      Vince Cable, Minister For (Giving All Of Us The) Business, says:


      If truth be known, I can’t even tell you about it now, ‘coz I don’t remember the fuck what it was, TBH w/U.


    • 288
      Lampshade says:

      Why haven’t people seen through Vince Cable yet?


  42. 224
    Chelsea Manning says:

    Monday papers are full of WAR. The western media wants its war and is going to get it.

    You can just see the BBC and Sky mongs in their flak jackets and tin hats reporting from Damascus.


    • 227
      The British Public says:

      There’ll be no war. We will oppose it, like we did with one of the Iraq wars. Anyone remember which?


      • 248
        Joe says:

        So many wars I’ve lost count.


        • 279
          The Troo Brits says:

          5 Labour wars

          we remember that much

          including the action in Afghanistan, still ongoing, which according to Labour would take place “without a single shot being fired”

          Fuck ‘em all


  43. 225
  44. 230
    They need exposing. Cameron and Hagye won't do it. says:


  45. 234
    Chelsea Manning says:

    Any Tory MP who supports this madness will not be re-elected in 2015. Their free meal ticket will end.

    There will be thousands of refugees heading our way.

    Cameron really is a fat fucking Tory c*nt.


  46. 235
    All our Yesterdays says:


  47. 236
    Chelsea Manning says:

    Britain to be roped into EU rescue aid for Greece
    The European Commission is planning use of EU budget funds for the next rescue of Greece, roping Britain into future responsibility for shoring up the eurozone currency structure.

    Can that c*nt Cameron be any more useless?


    • 335
      Can we all vote UKIP now please? says:

      “Can that c*nt Cameron be any more useless?”

      It’s hard to see how, but I’m sure he will find a way.


  48. 251
    Chelsea Manning says:

    amazing isn’t it? Someone makes a joke on Twitter about blowing an airport up and the fat idle plods arrest them.

    Cuunts like Cameron and Hague make REAL threats to murder thousands and nothing happens.


  49. 255
    Chelsea Manning says:

    Not mentioned on the BBC or Sky but in the USA opinion polls are heavily against the black Muslim Kenyan taking any action in Syria.

    If Obonkers decides not to take part what will Cuunteron and the French mong do? Syria is a far harder nut to crack than Libya was.

    The Navy have one sub and one warship and the RAF has 4 Typhoon fighters. Not exactly overwhelming is it?

    Perhaps Cuunteron is hoping the Syrians will piss themselves laughing so much they’ll all choke to death


  50. 265
  51. 268
    Anonymous says:

    So Hague says it is too late to detect if Sarin was used.

    NOT SO mr Hague

    “A urine or blood test can determine definitively if someone has been exposed. Hair can sometimes be used, if it has absorbed the agent.”

    This Blog will not allow more than 1 link/post but widely available using a Google search are the pictures of the Sarin victims in the Tokyo underground as are the photos of the Syrian Children. Unless the children have been cleaned up (vomit uncontrolled defecation)and their limbs repositioned (asphyxia) after “death” then the comparisons are not credible.


  52. 274
    Chelsea Manning says:

    So the entire British media seem up for a fight. Especially the left wing press.

    Funny as each cruise missile we launch will cost us ONE MILLION POUNDS A SHOT.

    I wonder how many teachers or nurses that could employ?

    Seems that when it comes to murdering people, the left don’t put a price on it.


  53. 290
    Nick Clegg says:

    What happened to that Olympic feel good spirit ?


    • 297
      albacore says:

      Is everybody happy? You bet your life we are!
      With the Parliament that we’ve got, ain’t we going far!
      You wouln’t trust those deadbeat bums alone to shovel shit
      For the one thing you’d be sure of – they’d drop us deep in it


  54. 301
    Long John Silver's parrot says:

    So the French millionaire Foreign Minister is saying the evidence is clear that there was a chemical induced massacre in Syria yet he is keeping the evidence to himself.

    I am a Chinaman.


  55. 319
    Jumbo says:

    You';re either in front of him, or behind


  56. 320
    broderick crawford says:

    Government To Appoint Bullshit Tsar

    THE government is to appoint a powerful new ‘czar’ to regulate the bullshit professions, including homeopathy, acupuncture and estate agency.
    The department for enterprise said the regulator’s remit will also cover public relations, marketing, advertising, finance and a wide range of diet-related bullshit.

    Tom Logan, labour market analyst at Donnelly-McPartlin, said: “At the moment anyone can join a bullshit profession or set themselves up as a bullshitter.

    “They simply rent an office, buy a bad suit and point at houses. Or they get a white coat and a chart of the human body, and then stick pins in your tongue, or claim they can cure cancer with some cheese, a teabag and a cucumber.”

    An enterprise department spokesman said: “While every profession is tainted with bullshit, we want to start by regulating those sectors that are founded on a solid core of pure bullshit.

    “The bullshit tsar’s first task will be to commission a firm of bullshitters to design a large building shaped like an upturned pram and then fill it with chancers who will spend the first year devising a series of slogans about bullshit.”

    He added: “Once we have picked a really good slogan the czar and his team will then draw up a series of bullshit qualifications that will mean absolutely fuck all.”


  57. 326
    The Auld Leech says:

    Scum. Hope the creep rots in jail until he is a very old man!


  58. 332
    Halcyon says:

    What is it that makes Benedictine schools in England so attractive, so appealing ?


  59. 341
    Tom Catesby says:

    Coulson call intercepted…. can we expect more arrests?


  60. 342

    Cameron,Blair,Murdoch,Rebekah Brooks and Andy Coulsen are all in or were in the same swim,it’s in very murky waters attached to number 10 & Media Presentation.The Media’s lack of any unbiased reporting on the Syrian issue speaks volumes.Is it because of the MOD’s D notice or still the manipulation by Government and the Press to feed the Public encouraging BS to support the Governments intentions whether they be right or wrong.Anything of value or interest to the Public is either suppressed or withheld.Blair survived on this for years having daily meeting with Brooks at 10 Downing Street each morning.Whilst we were fed BS about Blair & his Intended Policies.Blair did the ground work for his Tory allies to implement when in Power.His private chats with Unum,which now the DWP is a subsidiary could not have taken place within the time the Tories have held the helm.”Were all in it together” BSB.


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