August 25th, 2013

Coulson’s Mobile Phone Conversation Intercepted


A co-conspirator emailed on Friday:

Yesterday, I found myself walking up the Gray’s Inn Road alongside Andy Coulson. He was talking on his mobile phone to someone about the fact that his trial date had been moved. It was raining and he was mumbling a lot. But I did catch this brilliant quote:

“Whatever you do, don’t share that with anyone. Be very careful.”

I couldn’t resist papping him as he ambled along the road.

A funny thing to hear from the man who stands accused of conspiracy to intercept mobile phone voicemails, among other things. Be more careful Andy…


  1. 1
    Andrew says:

    Frankly, Guido, this is not worth reporting unless you know what he was hiding and to whom he was confiding it.

  2. 2

    What are next week’s lottery numbers, though?

  3. 3
    Lily Allen, on Twitter says:

    See ???? GUILTY!

  4. 4
    Chelsea Manning says:

    So the Syrians have agreed to let the UN weapons inspectors into the area of the ‘alleged’ chemical weapons attack. Remember how Obum boy and Cuuntermon were demanding this?

    Well know the Syrians have agreed the Tory cuunts and Obum bandit are now saying that it’s too late.

    This is being reported by Sky and the BBC without question, even though weapons experts THEY themselves have interviewed have stated evidence can last for years.

    The frog cuunts also stating that there is a pile of evidence against Assad. So where is it then? and where is the media checking these claims out?

    You’d think that there would be hundreds of western hacks heading to Syria to investigate and loads of rebel groups willing to show them.

    Yet there’s nothing, not a dicky bird.

    Cuuntermon, you should stick to finding out who *illy Hague was shagging in his hotel room and leave the world in peace.

    you really are fucked for 2015.

  5. 5
    a doctor says:

    applied CAREFULLY and CONIDENTIALLY a rectal suppository can be most efficacious

    and is not in great demand for sharing

  6. 6
    Chelsea Manning says:

    Any weapons inspectors turned up dead today?

  7. 7

    This advice is derived from you having the most successful blog in Britain is it Andrew?

  8. 8
    Mr & Mrs Jones says:

    Mr & Mrs Jones fury at pop star – “my teen son,Owen, saw Cheryl Cole’s bum tattoo and now he won’t stop masturbating over my curtains.”

  9. 9
    I'm a gonna'ere says:

    Was it a conversation about a STD’s?

  10. 10
    Fuck the EU says:

    Bomb France and Spain.

    Send in the Labour front bench on an unarmed fact finder to Syr!a.

    Vote UKIP.

  11. 11
    Casual Observer says:

    What is Monday mornings cryptic cartoon going to be about ?


  12. 12
    Demagogue says:

    “It was raining and he was mumbling a lot.”
    From the picture, it doesn’t look like it was raining – this is all pure fiction. move on.

  13. 13
    Casual Observer says:

    This Thursday, the 29th, could be the day…

  14. 14
    Casual Observer says:

    Should qualify that Monday will be notice day, Tuesday the reckoning, and Thursday the affirmation.

    What happens Wednesday is anyone’s guess :-)

  15. 15
    A Young Lady from Ealing says:

    “I couldn’t resist papping him as he ambled along the road.”

    What does “papping him” mean?

  16. 16
    Axe The Telly Tax & Religion & Kill All Ecoloons says:

    You can hear the laughter echoing from Moscow and Peking as O’Barmy, Camermong & Hollandaise make complete fools of themselves.

  17. 17
    Alan Turing says:

    It helps if someone to gives me a hand with the Monday morning cartoons.

  18. 18
    john in cheshire says:

    Could it be a shortened form of Paparazzi, hence the photo?

  19. 19
    Axe The Telly Tax & Religion & Kill All Ecoloons says:

    Send all the beeboid bumboys and SKY scum journalists, into the middle of the Syrian Alky Ada controlled areas, with a gun, and lets see how brave and mouthy they are!

  20. 20
    The Dictionary in Google search says:


    1. soft food for infants or invalids, as bread soaked in milk.

    2. ideas, writings, or the like, lacking substance or real value

    1. Midland U.S. A teat or nipple.

    2. Something resembling a nipple

    So he either sucked his nipple, showed him something lacking in value or gave him some baby food.

  21. 21
    Chief Petty arsehole Bryant says:

    I will only volunteer to serve on the HMS Westminster if I can be in charge of dispensing plenty of Rum,Bum and the Lash

  22. 22
    I d on't n eed no d octor says:

    Chelsea you fuckwit, the Assad regime will have planted evidence that incriminates the rebels. Why didn’t the Assad allow the inspectors in straight away?

  23. 23
    Chuka De Carnival says:
  24. 24
    I d on't n eed no d octor says:

    It was Mrs Coulson that he was talking to, and he was on about a chocolate cake, it’s Andy’s favourite.

  25. 25
    Owen Jones reporting for duty says:

    I have a missile shaped willy and I like cruising down built up areas at night.

  26. 26
    I d on't n eed no d octor says:


  27. 27
    Point of Information 4 says:


    But I do hear the sound of military kit being dusted down and made ready for use.

  28. 28
    Millionaire concerned abot the price of Goat Curry says:

  29. 29
    Z o'Randzam says:

    Suppose they gave a war and nobody came ?

  30. 30
    I d on't n eed no d octor says:

    How do you make a woman groan again after sex. Wipe your dick on the curtains.

  31. 31
    Owen says:

    Cheryl Cole? Sorry, don’t know him.

  32. 32
    The British Public says:

    Syria is none of our business

  33. 33
    Every little helps says:

    Got to say that is expensive. 95p in Tesco.

  34. 34
    The British Public says:

    I don’t care what the answer to that it, but if you think it is interesting, why don’t you go there yourself and ask.

  35. 35
    Crystal ball mystic says:

    I can see the lottery numbers, yes there they are, oh no they have gone, shit.

  36. 36
    Tony Blair says:

    Don’t ask me. Everything I used to know has been shredded

  37. 37
    The BBC causes serious mental illness says:

    Should get some impartial journo’s in, but recall the old maxim about ‘Not shooting the messenger.’

    Those who are writing the script and paying them to compromise their integrity for sure should be sent in. The BBC do need their numbers thinned.

  38. 38
    Horn honker says:

    Tooting to you from Ealing.

  39. 39
    I d on't n eed no d octor says:

    Abbott is a jerk, mind you so are all the other members of labours front bench.

  40. 40
    What's Important Is says:

    … the day they bring the inflated prices in the wine section in Sainsbury’s back down and pretend to have a sale?

  41. 41
    Blame the Ice Age says:

    Fracking Hell, Glaciers cause Blackpool to Rock

    Two earthquakes shake homes in Blackpool

  42. 42
    Admiral Byng says:

    The Navy can’t even shoo away a few Spanish police divers from a lump of concrete.

    Do you think the battle hardened Syrias will care about the deployment of a few pimply fat kids listening to ipods in rubber dinghies?

  43. 43
  44. 44
    Toenails says:

    If they can detect drugs in Athletes, pilots, surgeons etc 6 months down the line by taking hair and toenail samples I think it reasonable that they could do the same with a nerve agent.

  45. 45
    Hague's Shiny Bald Head says:

    Send them a load of money to start their own space programme.

  46. 46
    Ailurophile says:

    National Lottery: 18-22-23-29-32-43

    Euromillions: 03-21-27-38-40 / 06-08

    They’re courtesy of Dr. Mads Haahr of Trinity College Dublin, who has a great website which uses atmospheric noise to generate True Random numbers, as opposed to the Pseudo Random numbers generated by computers themselves (which ultimately repeat over time). See his free tool for picking Lotto.

  47. 47
    Hague's Shiny Bald Head says:

    I heard you were as impotent as me.

  48. 48
    Mine d'Boggles says:

    It is probably a mis-spelling of “pooping”, as in “pooping on him”….

  49. 49
    Axe The Telly Tax & Religion & Kill All Ecoloons says:

    ROFLMAO :-)

  50. 50
    Anonymous says:

    No price integrity there – those rob-dog rats!

  51. 51
    Axe The Telly Tax & Religion & Kill All Ecoloons says:

    +Infinity to the power infinity

  52. 52
    Andy Coulson says:

    I’m just glad they didn’t record me on the sex lines!

  53. 53
    Murray Arnold says:

    Once you’ve cracked the Monday morning cartoon you’ll feel a new man.

  54. 54
    Our EU membership fee: 20 billion reasons to vote UKIP says:

    “Why didn’t the Assad allow the inspectors in straight away?”

    I was wondering that, and I came up with the reasonable answer: it’s a warzone. Maybe Assad wasn’t too keen on a bunch of UN weapons inspectors getting shot by rebels who could be dressed as regular Syrian troops.

    So, maybe Assad was/is just trying to ensure the area’s safe.

    What I want to know, though, is what sort of chemical it was, because reports say 3,500 injured arrived at hospital. Injured? They should be dead. Pretty crappy nerve agents if you ask me. Sounds like someone got cheap ones off the Internet from China.

  55. 55
    Our EU membership fee: 20 billion reasons to vote UKIP says:

    + times two.

  56. 56
    John Prescott says:

    What deference wood it make anyway if you were on the sex lines and having a go theres nothing wrong with it if its all in a good cause i was once on their as a sexy fat madame all for the mariners charity and we raised a few bob and anyway its part of the Big Society changes that Ed (Special Needs) is going to announce in the Age of Chancers which follows on from Tony and Gordon but keep it away from Ed Balls-up because we dont want it leaking just yet as the plan is still at the blueprinter stage even so we’re bilking a new society that will be in the finesse Labour traditional so all you suthern jessies can go do one!

  57. 57
    Tories prepare for snap election says:

    Yes, it’s time for a war in Syria.

  58. 58
    Dave ( Dr Strangelove ) Cameron says:

    cardiff 2 Man C 1

  59. 59
    Anonymous says:

    nullThe photo could be of anybody ! i mean FFS why take a pic of somebodys back ?

  60. 60
    Anonymous says:

    Im getting very concerned at your obsession with william Hague ! you really do need to get out more and make some friends of your own age. You must also learn to speak normally, most people will chin you if you eff and jeff like you do on here in real life.You inadequate little prick.

  61. 61
    Anonymous says:

    fuck the eu, i have a better idea send nigel and the bongo bongo land man.They are expendable.

  62. 62
    Captain Straker says:

    Cool! Will it be like “UFO”?

  63. 63
    Fuck the EU says:

    No way to speak the potential future leaders of the UK.

    Out with the old, in with the new.

  64. 64
    Anonymous says:

    I dont think Moscow and peking are in any position to laugh at anybody. they are saddled with mad Eddie for the foreseeable ! Ha Ha Ha

  65. 65
    Dave ( Dr Strangelove ) Cameron says:

    cardiff 3 Man C 1

  66. 66
    Our EU membership fee: 20 billion reasons to vote UKIP says:

    So, slightly off topic, was Tony Blair really the best person to land the job of Middle East Peace Envoy?

    I can’t help thinking it’s not working out as it should be.

  67. 67
    Aggro says:

    I think she has already brought it to the commentators on Test Match Special

  68. 68
    Propaganda Watch says:

    Good point their AN: Some more detail would be good:

    This smells like a Clifford / Labour smear.

    Unless Hague was with a minor, a foreign agent, or perhaps had committed a criminal offense either with or against the other party, there is nothing in the public interest about who he shares a room with.

  69. 69
    Lard Pressclott of Beams, Bellies, Banjos, Bulimia, two bog seats, two Jags & Shags. says:

    Was he talking about pies ?

  70. 70
    Could we be so lucky? says:

    “Campylobacter [bacteria in most chicken sold in the UK] is estimated to cause 300,000 cases of food poisoning annually. While a number of newspaper reports today described it as a “deadly bug”, only around 70 of these cases are fatal each year.”

    Oh, please, please please please please..

  71. 71
    Point of Infromation 4 says:

    I meant the sound of Russ!an and Ch!nese military kit.

    And yes: Send an armed contingent of Labour educated youth with guns on a one way mission to a foreign land: They would cause a lot of damage, and probably shoot each other for fun at the end, saving us the return tickets.

    Question is: Which side are the UK Muzzies on ?

    Time for some concentration camps to keep them under control.

  72. 72
    A rural type says:

    Early closing?

  73. 73
    Ed Balls - Shallow Chancer says:

    Prices are up because of this Government’s failed economic policies. Under my stewardship, everything will come down: our Gold Bullion reserves, house prices, job prospects, the value of the Pound and our currency reserves.

  74. 74
    Great British Public says:

    Hopefully, NOTHING.

  75. 75
    Point of Infromation 4 says:

    ‘FFS why take a pic of somebodys back’ ?

    Perhaps because it is Andy Coulson ?

    Same argument can be leveled at alleged pictures of chemical weapons victims in Syr!a.

    FFS: They may just be pretending to be dead, may not even be in Syr!a, may have died of something else… etc.

    Still, looks like Coulson and I trust Guido to check his sources.

  76. 76
    Lady Shopper says:

    Tesco are worse. You know those Clubcard vouchers they send out? Tesco put the prices up just before they send them to you.

    For example: 1ltr bottle of Harvey’s Bristol Cream was £10. The vouchers arrived – including one for £1.80 off a 1ltr bottle of HBC. Off I went to Tesco and low and f*cking behold, it’s on the shelf at £11.80.

  77. 77
    Dave ( Dr Strangelove ) Cameron says:

    that’ll be the Edwina Curry Chicken meal

  78. 78
    Chelsea Manning says:

    Oh the old Assad planted the stuff. Well of course, that’s the media’s natural reaction. You don’t think that professional investigators would be able to see through that?

    Or is it a case of who cares just bomb the bastard?

  79. 79
    Major Bumsore says:

    So, is Dave ‘Gay Marriage’ Cameron going to be leading from the front or the rear on Syr!a ?

  80. 80
    Blur Witch Project : Chilcot Redux says:

    Send in Common Purpose International ?

  81. 81
    Gordon Brown Mk1 Dumb Bomb says:

    Drop me on Syria I’ll destroy their economic infrastructure.

  82. 82
    Living in 97.222% white Merseyside says:

    Talking of Andy Coulson I didn’t buy the Current Bun today.

  83. 83
    Living in 97.222% white Merseyside says:

    Yes, he certainly seems set to preside over 10 years of BOOM!

  84. 84
    Living in 97.222% white Merseyside says:

    To emulate his predecessor he has to save the World not just the Middle East.

  85. 85
  86. 86
    Gaye Mann (Mrs) says:

    There’s scraping the bottom of the barrel, and then there’s this. Dear, oh dear. Does the Digger insist all the good stuff is kept just for the Current Bun?

  87. 87
    Blur Witch Project : Chilcot Redux says:

    Or perhaps have fingered one which the public are familiar with to make the propaganda more credible.

  88. 88
    Owen Jones says:

    Is jerk chicken the same as choked?

  89. 89
    Cornish Pilchard says:

    Pippa Middleton’s back is regularly;y photographed

  90. 90
    Anonymous says:

    Can we send Allan,Glenn and Miranda as well, please ?

  91. 91
    DAVE Fuckwit CAMERMONG says:

    Biggest baby boom for over 40 years , not enough midwives to cope !
    Never mind midwives , Who the fuck is supposed to pay for all these bastards ?

    Oh i forgot we will !

  92. 92
    Tay King-dePisse says:

    Your Lordship– and I humour you with that style– haven’t you got a chinks nearby that you can put out of business for the evening, and spare us any more of your eructations?

  93. 93
    G'day cobbers, it's Lynton Cosby here says:

    Focus groups from key marginals suggest that coffins draped with the Union Flag plus Dave and SamCam comforting bereaved parents at military funerals could be worth 5% at the polls.

    The bonus is this is drawing votes mainly from UKIP, showing cold steel to the fuzzie-wuzzies has 100% approval.

    Ed has no-where to go on this one, we think he’ll come over as an appeaser like Kinnock.

    The only problem is the BBC surrender monkeys, but will invoke enabling powers to force then to carry Dave’s nightly broadcast.


  94. 94
    Chelsea Manning says:

    Willy Hague just been on TV spouting more fucking lies about Syria. Fuck off and go bum your boyfriend you Tory twat.

  95. 95
    UKIP or bust says:

    Or is it?

  96. 96
    Chelsea Manning says:

    BBC have a weekly update on Sunday morning about banning Page 3. I suspect none of the females at the BBC could get a job on Page 3.

    Nikki Campbell would like to be on Page 3 in the Gay Times though.

  97. 97
    Aaron D Highside says:

    Sulky, Guido! Andrew has a valid point.

  98. 98
    Ena says:

    Ooooh, a free tool Mavis.

  99. 99
    Ed Balls says:

    88.4, eleventy-one, forty-eleven, pi, umpteen and x.

  100. 100
    Con, con, and con again says:

    Tesco’s, the shop for halfwits.

  101. 101
    I d on't n eed no d octor says:

    Chelsea, piss off you dumb person.

  102. 102
    Nobby Pickens says:

    Doesn’t say much for blogging in Britain, does it?

  103. 103
    broderick crawford says:

    well…. grays inn road and theobalds road arethe fulcrum of the famous grays inn one of the great london inns of court .
    so the hypothesis could be he had just finalised a consultation with his barrister domiciled in the rabbitwarren of legal chambers housed in grays inn itself and jockeys fields adjacent . the legal eagle had phoned andy pandy to inform him of an aspect that had just come to light or had not been covered in aforementioned pow wow .

    at which point anders issued the overheard supplication to silence and omerta’ .


  104. 104
    I d on't n eed no d octor says:

    Your numbers are too far and too fast.

  105. 105
    Chuka ( you can call me Harrison ) Urmunneyaround says:

    Two British tourists, Modupe Idowu and Esther Jubril Badmos, trapped in China. Try and find those names in the Domesday Book.

  106. 106
    Nobby Pickens says:

    That photo could be of any old tart. Why isn’t it chucking down, then?

  107. 107
    East of Suez says:

    This the is t kind of thing that I expect Dave to sort out. Instead he is making empty threats to some guy in Syria about matters that should be none of his business.

  108. 108
    GCHQ says:

    If it’s true that he was shouting confidential idown a mobile in a public place then perhaps Coulson deserves to be jailed for stupidity if nothing else.

  109. 109
    Londoner says:

    You think they are bad in the UK? Somewhere on one of my mobiles I have a picture of a bottle of ‘French Whisky’ that they had put on sale in one of their Chinese stores.

  110. 110
    broderick crawford says:

    perhaps he was taken with the small and perfectly formed symmetry of the alleged andrew’s rear nether regions

    wasn’t ahorsetrainer by any chance …. living in the cotswolds ?

  111. 111

    Funny you should say that because Dave has just sent Syria £76,193,445.57p

  112. 112

    I am in a village whose cricket green is home to the oldest cricket club in Hampshire. It is a delightful sunny afternoon after a rather cloudy start and the only thing which has marred my visit has been the need to buy diesel at 40% more than I paid last week.

    If the money were being spent wisely, one might suffer it but that is not the case.

  113. 113
    Dr Liam Fox MP says:

    “…[T]here is nothing in the public interest about who he shares a room with.”

    And so say The Talented Mr Werritty and I. Hear hear!

  114. 114
    Mr Angry with the UK's lack of immigration policy or control says:


    They weren’t tourists either. On some dodgy business thing trying to rip the Chinks off.

    I trust they will be deported to country of original Origin, saving us the time, cost and trouble of the British courts and the human rites Lawyers.

  115. 115
    Gladioli or bust says:

    It must be very annoying not being able to kick off when you don’t get your own way and then accuse everyone of racism.

    In the many times I have been going to China I have never received anything but courtesy from people trying to sell me things, even when there have been misunderstandings and language barriers.

    I think there is something about this story we have not been told.

  116. 116
    nellnewman says:

    I’m not sure SC that village cricket is allowed under labour’s health and safety laws anymore. that cricket ball is very hard you know if it hits some on the head, especially if that someone is dumb enough not to duck out of the way!!

  117. 117
    broderick crawford says:

    2 3 9 11 22 48

    fraid i do not know the bonus ball

  118. 118
    nellnewman says:

    So where is andyburnham, the last labour government’s, Minister of Death and now apparently the Heir Apparent to militwit when labour finally work up enough courage to stab militwit in the back?

    Et Tu Brute?

    I don’t think so!!

  119. 119
    Lord Ed of Pwimwose Hiwl says:

    Gold old English fare.

  120. 120
    anon says:

    I have a full-frontal pap of Ed Miliband not yet losing at Jenga, dear. I may have to retrieve it from Tinker’s litter tray, though.

  121. 121
    The Official Interpreter says:

    He gives a great handjob if you are rich enough, and he really likes a piece of the action

  122. 122
    broderick crawford says:

    if bradley manning has now turned into chelsea does that mean billy and hilly s daughter is now re named bradley clinton??

  123. 123
    Tony Blair's Shredder says:

    If he takes over, it will be the first time a Labour leader has been deserving of punishment for crimes against humanity since the last time.

  124. 124
    blah.....It was raining.....blah.... says:

    Maybe he Photoshopped-out the rain. People do seem to have excess time on their hands.

  125. 125
    Propaganda Watch says:

    Too much smoke with dodgy BAE deals there to not be any fire.

  126. 126
    Pentagon GPS Navigation Branch says:

    We can use it next Thursday to randomly pick Syrian missile targets….

  127. 127

    @nell, since I have been back in the UK for my short visit, the combination of three words have been quoted with obvious disdain by almost everyone I have met.

    Those words are health and safety.

    I cannot think of any clearer example of why the UK cannot claim to be a democratic country when such unwanted legislation is thrust upon us and the effect of which is not to promote the intended cause but rather to employ deadbeats who can then lord it over more hard working and talented people whilst simultaneously and unnecessarily raising their cost of living..

  128. 128
    Elsie Beattie (83 and a quarter) says:

    No you are not, dear. You are sitting in your darkened room, surrounded by computers that have their own monikers, typing strange comments to that kind Mr. Fawkes’ internet weblog.

  129. 129
    broderick crawford says:

    Rainfall is relative and thus depends on ones psychic state at the time as to whether it can be noted or perceived in the great ether of existence …. as Schopenhauer would not have said .

    Ones psychic and indeed mental and emotional state in turn depends on how many triple absynthes you have managed to down before stumbling out of the duke of york pub at 12.30 pm on the given day and perceiving torrential rainfall which to all others may have been oerceived as hot , humid and dry

  130. 130
    broderick crawford says:

    it will rain on wednesday .

  131. 131
    Hot Favourite says:

    He’s still 80/1 with Paddy Power.
    Get your money on him now, before that plummets.

  132. 132

    Whatever you say, dear. Have you taken your medicine yet, you naughty old lady?

  133. 133
    Saddam Munir Mubarak Assad Bin Clinton says:

    Box. Its a box. And I did not set off the gas with that woman.

  134. 134
    Just Curious says:

    Is Chukka a Muzzie?

  135. 135
    Maq­boul says:

    Andrew aka Aaron, Guido has a bigger point.

  136. 136
    broderick crawford says:

    ” giving ” a war ?

    wot .. you mean .. like ….. in …. ” giving ” a party ??

  137. 137


  138. 138
    broderick crawford says:

    Chukka a muzzie .. ??

    no he ‘ s just a slaphead .

  139. 139
    Maq­boul says:

    And yet everyone seems to think that Israel is.

  140. 140
    broderick crawford says:

    yes similar to lobster where the chef picks your selected lobster from a cold water tank and places it live in a cauldron of boiling water .

    with the chicken you select from the hens padding around the hen coop in th back yard and the chef then strangles it and cooks it fresh to your liking.

    whether he de feathers it and/or takes out its entrails prior to doing so depends on local custom in the country concned and the degree of perceived machismo in the population .

  141. 141
    Barp says:

    Ealing you from tooting

  142. 142
    8illy says:

    I feel a new man every Sunday in Brighton.

  143. 143
    broderick crawford says:

    yes it is indeed sad that only 70 percent are fatal .

    Given this virus a affects only the very cheap cuts bought mainly from remaindered somerfield stock sold on to pound stores aft expiry date and bought by chavs , unwaged , single mothers , benefit fraudsters and other ne’er do wells we should really try to work towards a 100 percebt efficacy result .

  144. 144
    just a few miles away says:

    I’m on my way down to give you a good fucking kicking.

  145. 145
    A Reader says:

    Guide, someone else said this earlier, but I have to endorse their view: your site seems to be unstable. Maybe you have too many adverts running or something.

  146. 146
    broderick crawford says:

    what about the EMPLOYMENT rate Ed

    will that come down too ???

  147. 147
    Anonymous says:

    That probably is the response of the year.

  148. 148
    Lost in Clacton says:

    Guido Fawkes now a witness for the Prosecution.

    Well I never!

  149. 149
    Mr main wearing says:

    Might happen if they are all down picking up their social fags and diamond white n’stuff

  150. 150
    broderick crawford says:

    well she can probably still rescue it if she hurries .
    the test may just be ending if the duckworth lewis is invoked because of bad light and it will only go in the bin coz the only person who used to guzzle those cakes was johnners and he s brown bread now .

  151. 151
    Arab Winter says:

    Nor was Iraq. Nor was Libya. Nor is Afghanistan.
    The only thing it achieves is that eventually they hate us more
    than they hate each other.

  152. 152
    Village Idiot says:

    ….Boot sale??????

  153. 153
    Max Harris says:

    I trust that this Government is doing all that is necessary to increase prison places whilst maintaining its promise to reduce expense to the taxpayer by 20%.

    A lot of people are walking around our streets who are going to be found guilty very soon.

    A lot of money could be saved by putting one of those new non commissioned non nuclear aircraft carriers up the Thames and converted into a floating prison. Prison menus could be simplified by non multiple choices at meal times plus the raising of fees for prison visits.

    Where there is a will, there is a way.

  154. 154
  155. 155
    Aid Well Spent says:

  156. 156

    Better hurry! The lid goes down on my laptop and I am off after this comment is sent.

  157. 157
    broderick crawford says:

    well gideon and carney should be pleased .

    with current forward projection obliterating most of the north west of the kingdom by end 2014 it will set ozzie up nicely for an election splurge on a new housebuildin programme in the newly devastated northwest and carney can increase interest rates coz the unemployment total will have dived coz a substantial quantity will have expired .

    large triples all round .

  158. 158
    Lady Shopper says:


    Before last Christmas, my Tesco had a big promotion – right in the front of the store – for Gordon’s gin, 1ltr.

    They claimed it was “on offer” at £14, “reduced from £21″.

    Which was odd, because I’d bought a bottle there a week earlier for £16.

    They take their customers for mugs; I don’t shop there much, now.

  159. 159
    A Modest Proposal says:

    Just keep the prisoners in their cells or at work and open the fabulous sports facilities at the prisons at prime locations like Holloway to the general public. These are already built and should turn a tidy profit instead of being a drain on the taxpayer.

  160. 160
    Eurocrat says:

    And to help we are going to require Britain to make a major contribution to the next, and subesquent Eurozone bailouts, despite you not being in it. Isn’t socialism wonderful:we’re all in it together.

  161. 161
    Another Reader says:

    Definitely. It’s become unusable on Opera and fairly unusable on Firefox (Windows and Android).

    I try to avoid Chrome because blocking the adverts is harder. And as For IE, well.. dunno.

  162. 162
    UKID DING says:

  163. 163
    Lip dick says:

    Burnham was just on sky news demanding Cameron invades Syria. What is it with leftie twats and picking fights

  164. 164
    The British Public says:

    Actually, only the mus lims and a few folk in London and Manchester could care less about the Middle East. Almost everyone else can no longer be bothered to pretend to care and more. We are bored with it.

  165. 165
    Major McTitmus Smythe KFC VD and scar says:

    Before we go to war is not the usual preparation a dodgy dossier and someone in the UN council showing stuff off the Internet like Tone did.

  166. 166
    Kelly rip says:

    They will turn up dead if they don’t produce the results America/Izzy and their lap dogs want.

  167. 167
    Another modest proposal says:

    Just shoot the prisoners.

    Retrospectively, starting with Chris Huhne and David Laws.

    (I know David Laws wasn’t jailed for stealing £50,000 from us, but he f*cking well should have been. And then shot).

  168. 168
    The blue Skoda in the carpark says:

    Looking at that photo is appears that someone has shit upon Andy Coulson from a great height.

    I wonder who?

  169. 169
    Yvonne from the Colliers Arms Clydach says:

    And to think this man is involved in the education of our children.

    That is really sickening.

  170. 170
    So far this year, Dave has squandered £12,978,308,942.16 on our EU membership. says:

    Labour set for a 76-seat majority.

    Poor Dimmy Dave! Do you think the embarrassing figure in my moniker might be part of the problem? I do.

    Wave bye bye to poor Dimmy Dave! “Bye bye, Dimmy Dave! Bye bye!”

  171. 171
    The British Public says:

    They aren’t gaffes. The MSM just don’t understand. What are being heard are some of the voices and views that they normally pretend don’t exist.

    Ironically, it is ‘diversity’, something they claim to ‘celebrate’ at the Guardian but actually fear.

  172. 172
  173. 173
    Democracy Now says:

    Only because the electoral system is rigged so one vote in Scotland is the same as five votes in England.

  174. 174
    Lord Cutglass says:

    Oh an English village just before a war!

    Is there still honey for tea and is the clock stuck on ten to three?

    And as for that pub do they still sell Bombadier?

  175. 175
    The British Public says:

    We aren’t going to war.

  176. 176
    Golly says:

    Are the bikes on the right hand side of that photo significant?

  177. 177
    So far this year, Dave has squandered £12,978,787,855.15 on our EU membership. says:

    Oh, and so far this year, Dave has squandered £7,138,317,024.04 on foreign aid. To countries with space programmes and nuclear weapons.

    Shame. Our military might have needed some of it.

    But Dave knew best. “We face no wars for ten years”, Dave said, in 2010, as he scrapped our military.

    Clever Dimmy Dave!

  178. 178
    Anonymous says:

    Wouldnt it be great if it was decided not to proceed with the case because of Sallyesque comment on twitter by that well known motor mouth .Lily Allen.

  179. 179
    So far this year, Dave has squandered £12,978,915,651.95 on our EU membership. says:

    Yeah. Might not have been such a good idea for Dimmy Dave Camoron and his chums to call Conservatives “swivel eyed loons”, eh?

    Well, Dimmy Dave knew what he was doing.

    76 seats. Wow.

    As I said, “Bye bye Dimmy Dave!”

  180. 180
    UKID DING says:

    A 76 seat Labour majority would produce precisely ZERO Ukip MPs.

    Vote Ukip, get Red Ed.

  181. 181
    Anonymous says:

    Nicky has 4 kiddies, i dont think he is gay.

  182. 182
    Notting Hill Resident says:

    Africans disturbing the peace? Shurely shome mishtake?

  183. 183
    Anonymous says:

    William Hague seems fascinate a lot of people on here, i think they are jealous. He is very bright and they arent !

  184. 184
    God says:

    I stopped wearing sandals years ago

  185. 185
    England says:

    Then Dave should pull his fucking finger out of his backside and reform the political system to make ‘one man one vote’ mean precisely that.

    That includes the immediate repeal of the Parliamentary Voting System and Constituencies Act 2011 which protect both Na h-Eileanan an Iar and Orkney and Shetland from being added to any other constituencies.

  186. 186
    Anonymous says:

    It’s a bacterium, you moron…

  187. 187
    Anonymous says:

    Surely Andy isnt a credible replacement for Milliband, especially with the Stafford debacle hanging over him ?

  188. 188
    Anonymous says:

    If you remember the libdems wouldnt support boundary changes and we voted against FPTP.

  189. 189
    Anonymous says:

    I wish you would stop being so inane, except for your posts its been good on here this afternoon. You are a Fecking half wit.

  190. 190
    A Taxpayer says:

    He costs us a packet. On top of his huge salary, his expenses were £94,913.16 in the financial year 2011-12 – which were lower than they would have been because he also gets the run of a grace-and-favour mansion in Kent and the public don’t get to know what that little number costs us.

  191. 191
    Anonymous says:

    It’s true.

    Tesco used to be good value for money but now they’re mostly a rip-off. I go there far less than I used to.

  192. 192
    Democracy Now says:

    Its a pathetic excuse to say that the others also want to subvert our democracy so it is OK to fail the public in this manner.

    Every MP in parliament who took part in the shameful efforts to prevent reform of the boundaries should be under arrest as an enemy of the state. If that means all of them, then let’s get 640 cells ready.

    One Man One Vote. Now.

  193. 193
    Anonymous says:

    But one day you will be caught.

  194. 194
    Saki says:

    There are a few people in prison for things that probably shouldn’t be crimes, so I you won’t mind if I respectfully disagree.

  195. 195
    Bongo says:

    What’s with the latest trend in adverts showing a black man / white woman couple.

    Halifax, some furniture company. etc.

    Are we being indoctrinated into thinking this is the norm ?

  196. 196
    Andy Burnham 13000 deaths ANC counting says:

    War war war… Can I put we war paint ake up on now, oh go on pleeeeasse I bought it special.

  197. 197
    8ILLY says:

    God too is a looser.

  198. 198
    Ahead of the Game says:

    Andrew Rawnsley was back in The Observer (my caps) today, I see. No need to buy it though – I got my Economist on Friday.

  199. 199
    SCS says:

    Furniture?? We sell finance and boxwood.

  200. 200
    Anonymous says:

    Ah so you’ve seen the ad.

  201. 201
  202. 202
    Anonymous says:

    I did not know it was so twisted. Time for a change.

  203. 203
    Napoleon says:

    Never interrupt your adversary when he is in the process of making a mistake

  204. 204
    Democracy Now says:

    Yup, its a totally shocking situation. If people realised just how utterly unfair the system is, they would be very angry. But the three main parties are not going to tell them. The system is rigged.

  205. 205
    Anonymous says:

    The postal voting system – in its current form – needs scrapping.

    Scrap it and start again.

    Stop the postal voting fraud NOW. Right NOW, I tell thee!

  206. 206
    The FibDemon party says:

    Fuck off !

  207. 207
    End Impunity for Deaths in the NHS says:

    You should be in prison. Painting your face won’t help you there.

  208. 208
    Leveson's mongoloid half brother: Anonymous 'n' says:

    Those in glass houses…

  209. 209
    Telly Watch says:

    Perhaps the advertisers have been watching a bit too much interracial p0rn.

    It is not normal, nor is it healthy.

  210. 210
    Anonymous says:

    Tesco – another bunch of cheeky pirates!

    That “Brand Match” bullshit at Sainsbury’s is the biggest f*cking deception going (pardon my profane language), you know the one – the stitch up (or false rivalry) between themselves, Asda and Tesco, which doesn’t include Waitrose. The other day, I came across an item in Sainsbury’s where the price had been hiked to two-and-a-half times the price of the same item in Waitrose (previously pegged to the Waitrose price) and then marked down as a “one-third off” deal. Ruddy rob-dogs!

  211. 211
    New Improved Answer says:

    Such couples do exist. Just not as much as they do in the imaginings of the ‘creatives’ in the advertising industry.

    I expect there will be a re-appraisal in the end – all of these fads die a death eventually.

  212. 212
    labourunionsbbc are one under the EU says:

    Can you imagine the fuss if a UKIP politician had said that.

  213. 213
    Anonymous says:

    I don’t know what this bollocks is all about; UKIP have been having a rather good summer – they’ve been setting the agenda! Say it ain’t true.

  214. 214
    Anonymous says:

    I see where you’re coming from!

  215. 215
    Bigoted Answer says:

    Good question. Has minimum wage gone up ?

  216. 216
    Maybelline says:

  217. 217
    Universal Hiss says:

    I’ve just been reading this…

    Wonder if Cat’s been there?

  218. 218
    Blowing Whistles says:

    Could you fax those numbers to No 10 they need the money 0207 925 0918 – there’s a good chap.

  219. 219
    Abdul the envelope stuffer in Lahore says:

    Thanking you very much indeed. I have three wives and sixteen children to feed.

  220. 220
    By Gum you are making it all a bit to Obvious Mr Hague says:

    Eeh by gum.

    This war with Assad is planned and they don’t want it cancelled.

    Hague has been mithering like a schoolgirl for days demanding that he can have a look and see for himself and now when told he can he has a hissy fit and throws his toys out of the pram, saying it’s too late to see anything useful now, you’ve gone and ruined my plan.

    Violet Elizabeth Bott was more mature than Hague.

  221. 221
    Incapable Vince, deputy Chief Cockroach says:


  222. 222
    Fat Waaah says:

    Don’t see too many with a brown man in PJs and a white woman all dolled up.

  223. 223
    Universal Hiss says:

    It’s all been fine here since that Welsh lunatic departed.

    I’m still using XP(hate Vista & Windows 8) with Firefox & their wonderful Ad block.

  224. 224
    Chelsea Manning says:

    Monday papers are full of WAR. The western media wants its war and is going to get it.

    You can just see the BBC and Sky mongs in their flak jackets and tin hats reporting from Damascus.

  225. 225
  226. 226
    Blowing Whistles says:

    Did someone mention William the very Vague of scraping the bottom of the barrel to look impotent ‘cos I was just reading the telegraph of today an article entitled United they stand – divided they fall?

    Here’s a snippet:-

    Mention the prospect of a second coalition between the Tories and the Lib Dems to Bob Wollard, and the response is deafening. “The very talk of it is thoroughly ghastly,” roars Mr Wollard, who earlier this year founded the Conservative Grassroots movement to oppose the Government’s same-sex marriage legislation.

    “The Lib Dem tail has been wagging the Conservative dog in this coalition …”

    The reason i mention it here is because of the film Wag the Dog – where journalists are fed diktats by government spokespersons and a false flag is played out … Its a classic film.

    btw the article was opposite some kweer looking fucker promoting himself again.

  227. 227
    The British Public says:

    There’ll be no war. We will oppose it, like we did with one of the Iraq wars. Anyone remember which?

  228. 228
    Blowing Whistles says:

    But not them faxes into the DCU at Downing street – you fucker!

  229. 229
    Blowing Whistles says:

    G4S submit some interim statistics on Tuesday.

    Anyone for a cookery class?

  230. 230
    They need exposing. Cameron and Hagye won't do it. says:

  231. 231
    Blowing Whistles says:

    Just heard Willy the Vague giving it large on a radio news bulletin (via sky)

    Vague is clutching at straws and scraping the bottom of the barrel in trying to sound all ‘expert’ on degraded chemicals …

    Who the F makes up all this legalistic rhetoric and baloney that Vague promulgates as though it were fact?

  232. 232
    They need exposing. Cameron and Hague won't do it. says:

  233. 233
    Blowing Whistles says:

    It’s not so much chickens as the complete rabble of Turkeys we have that front up as politicians in this country. They’d vote for Christmas if they were told to.

  234. 234
    Chelsea Manning says:

    Any Tory MP who supports this madness will not be re-elected in 2015. Their free meal ticket will end.

    There will be thousands of refugees heading our way.

    Cameron really is a fat fucking Tory c*nt.

  235. 235
    All our Yesterdays says:

  236. 236
    Chelsea Manning says:

    Britain to be roped into EU rescue aid for Greece
    The European Commission is planning use of EU budget funds for the next rescue of Greece, roping Britain into future responsibility for shoring up the eurozone currency structure.

    Can that c*nt Cameron be any more useless?

  237. 237
    Blowing Whistles says:

    + the Charity Commission.

  238. 238
    Chelsea Manning says:

    Where’s his boyfriend then?

  239. 239
    Lord Haw Haw says:

    Nobody likes a turncoat

  240. 240
    Blowing Whistles says:

    He is Margaret Beckett reincarnated.

  241. 241
    A Beard says:

    I wonder if he put that coconut on expenses.

  242. 242
    Blowing Whistles says:

    Not hunting me down then you ‘old’ bastard?

  243. 243
    Putrid Giblets says:

    Chuka’s your ideal man to jerk off a chicken.

  244. 244
    Blowing Whistles says:

    Sorry I withdraw the ‘old’ word; don’t want to be seen as ageist.

  245. 245
    Blowing Whistles says:

    Get with the public matey – The Labour Party are FINISHED.

  246. 246
    Now then, now then says:

  247. 247
    Anonymous says:

    Although he is a Tory, let’s just call him a fat fucking c.u.n.t if the Party goes ahead with this.

  248. 248
    Joe says:

    So many wars I’ve lost count.

  249. 249
    Blowing Whistles says:

    The NSA and GCHQ – “DON’T LIKE IT UP EM” – fucking spooks chasing their own fucking tails.

  250. 250
    Joe says:

    They’re NOT British so Fuck ‘em.


  251. 251
    Chelsea Manning says:

    amazing isn’t it? Someone makes a joke on Twitter about blowing an airport up and the fat idle plods arrest them.

    Cuunts like Cameron and Hague make REAL threats to murder thousands and nothing happens.

  252. 252
    Blowing Whistles says:

    Bikes! Don’t mention the Bike rebekk….

  253. 253
    Wacist Bob says:

    I’m sure the chinks could put them in a zoo or something then all the chinky kids could go look at them on their school trips and be taught the dangers of multiculturalism and diversity.

    Just a thought.

  254. 254
    Wacist Bob says:

    I think it’s a simple case of – that’s what happens when you play the racist card in China.

  255. 255
    Chelsea Manning says:

    Not mentioned on the BBC or Sky but in the USA opinion polls are heavily against the black Muslim Kenyan taking any action in Syria.

    If Obonkers decides not to take part what will Cuunteron and the French mong do? Syria is a far harder nut to crack than Libya was.

    The Navy have one sub and one warship and the RAF has 4 Typhoon fighters. Not exactly overwhelming is it?

    Perhaps Cuunteron is hoping the Syrians will piss themselves laughing so much they’ll all choke to death

  256. 256
    Wacist Wodger says:

    I believe they call it Chimping out?

  257. 257
    Anonymous says:

    Remember the IDF Maxim: “first shoot the photographers”.

  258. 258
    Blowing Whistles says:

    Its old but I am going to repeat it:

    Mark Twain – “The mere mention of the word lawyer is enough to deprive a man of all public confidence”.

    legal experts – Proficient commissioned liars who dare not take the stand to testify on oath.

  259. 259
    Blowing Whistles says:

    He is only following his orders from Israel.

  260. 260
    Wacist Bob says:

    They’re all cυnts.

  261. 261
    Herr S. Fry says:

    I could tell you, but you would probably vomit.

  262. 262
    Blowing Whistles says:

    Does Mensch have private swimming sessions in New York with the dirty old digger?

  263. 263
    Vince Cable, Minister For (Giving All Of Us The) Business, says:


    If truth be known, I can’t even tell you about it now, ‘coz I don’t remember the fuck what it was, TBH w/U.

  264. 264
    The advertising and reeducation industry says:

    Indeed, we need more of them in adverts otherwise it would be totally racist and we don’t want anyone to think we are racists because we’re not at all racist in any way shape or form.

  265. 265
  266. 266
    brits says:

    Israel = Arab

    we don’t give a fuck

  267. 267
    William Hague, the Tory Owen Jones of the 70's, says:

    (Not to imply that I have one.)

  268. 268
    Anonymous says:

    So Hague says it is too late to detect if Sarin was used.

    NOT SO mr Hague

    “A urine or blood test can determine definitively if someone has been exposed. Hair can sometimes be used, if it has absorbed the agent.”

    This Blog will not allow more than 1 link/post but widely available using a Google search are the pictures of the Sarin victims in the Tokyo underground as are the photos of the Syrian Children. Unless the children have been cleaned up (vomit uncontrolled defecation)and their limbs repositioned (asphyxia) after “death” then the comparisons are not credible.

  269. 269
    Middle-class piss head says:

    It’s not just Tesco, it’s everyCo.

    For example, Barefoot do a lovely cheeky Merlot which Tesco now sells at £6.99, but so do everyone else except for Bargainbooze who sell it at £11 for 2, i.e. £5.50.

  270. 270
    v says:

    The Civil Service

    WTF do you think they did?

  271. 271
  272. 272
    po' ol' whitey says:

    Ethnic Cleansing in Notting Hill

  273. 273
    Abdul the Jihadist says:


    u is our Huntry now

  274. 274
    Chelsea Manning says:

    So the entire British media seem up for a fight. Especially the left wing press.

    Funny as each cruise missile we launch will cost us ONE MILLION POUNDS A SHOT.

    I wonder how many teachers or nurses that could employ?

    Seems that when it comes to murdering people, the left don’t put a price on it.

  275. 275
    Gordon is a moron says:




  276. 276
    Harold Godwinson says:

    em i britiz?

    uz moz be jokin mun!

  277. 277
    There's more says:

    Blood and urine can be collected as long as 30 days after exposure and laboratory tests may reveal the presence of sarin or breakdown products.

    Of course the UN Chem weapon team would know this as they are the experts. So why is Hague now reluctant for the inspection to go ahead?

  278. 278
    The Troo Brits says:

    UKIP ain’t perfect

    but they are a fcuk sight better than the other shite-fer-brains parties.

    Vote UKIP and vote for liberty.

  279. 279
    The Troo Brits says:

    5 Labour wars

    we remember that much

    including the action in Afghanistan, still ongoing, which according to Labour would take place “without a single shot being fired”

    Fuck ‘em all

  280. 280
    Not Blowing Whistles says:

    Isn’t Dave taking out Wonga loans on our behalf these days ?

  281. 281
    Anonymous says:

    Because it does not fit with the programme.

  282. 282
    Not Blowing Whistles says:

    Plausible deniability that it no proof means it happened ?

  283. 283
    Canary Wharf Rat says:

    Aren’t the Comex futures for August meant to be delivering this week ?

  284. 284
    Large Breasts in Middle England says:

    There is a thesis to be written on the impact that multi-culti has had on the traditional English village rosy cheeked buxom lass.

    Large breasted English women of good farming stock, with the perfect set for serving saucy pub lunches and pints have I fear been greatly affected by the mass immigration campaign.

    This should be reported as a genocide.

    Bring back large breasts and rosy cheeks.

    Vote UKIP.

  285. 285
    Hague is following American Spin and Pre-arranged Plans. says:

    “If the Syrian government had nothing to hide and wanted to prove to the world that it had not used chemical weapons in this incident, it would have ceased its attacks on the area and granted immediate access to the UN–five days ago. At this juncture, the belated decision by the regime to grant access to the UN team is too late to be credible,” the official said.

    If there is no UN authorization, the United States would lead any possible strike, but, a senior official told ABC News “we do not want to do anything on our own.” U.S. allies must commit both “resources” and “political will” the official said.

  286. 286
    Vague memories... says:

    Didn’t Hague deliver the news to Le0n Br!ttan on a Brighton Beach that Leon was to go to Europe immediately ?

  287. 287
    Armchair Civilian says:

    There is a battle going on. Why should they cease fire so that people making an allegation against them can use the absence of shelling to move troops etc about in that area unhindered? Were the rebels ceasing fire?

  288. 288
    Lampshade says:

    Why haven’t people seen through Vince Cable yet?

  289. 289
    Not Blowing Whistles says:

    Things missing:

    i) Proof that access to UN has been denied or even requested
    ii) Practicalities of getting inspectors to the area
    iii) Anything which makes any sense regarding the sudden urgency. (Except possible Gold defaults looming)

    The US played this game in !raq. Sadam complied with all demands, but could not come out and openly say: I have no means of defending myself. That would have been suicide domestically and with those on his border.

    If Russ!a and !ran are continuing support of Assad then things cannot be that bad in Syr!a: It was back in January we had the false propaganda that Assad was facing imminent defeat.

    With Obama in office the US has zero legitimacy.

    Watchword is: Benghazi.

  290. 290
    Nick Clegg says:

    What happened to that Olympic feel good spirit ?

  291. 291
    But why the Urgency? says:

    The sudden urgency is certainly puzzling.

    The Attack planned is a minimal risk (to the Yanks) and does not involve any troops on the ground (special forces?) and will consist of Glide weapons and cruise missiles all launched outside Syrian airspace.

  292. 292
    Muppet Labs says:

    We have found that if you print the cartoon out on a high resolution laser printer and look at it upside down at an oblique angle under a planar lighting source, it still doesn’t make much sense.

  293. 293
    The News is breaking FAST says:

    ‘Recall Parliament NOW': MPs say Cameron must go to the Commons to debate Syria as Britain and U.S. prepare missile strikes ‘within days’

  294. 294
    Not Blowing Whistles says:

    Only urgency that springs to mind is to get in and do damage before winter, and after Ram’adan.

    So no conflict with religious observances, and if Winter there is like last year, knocking out key infrastructure over the next few weeks will guarantee a humanitarian disaster which would likely knock Assad from power.

  295. 295
    Armchair Civilian says:

    There is no urgency in Syria. The whole crisis is being artificially stoked up.

  296. 296
    Not Blowing Whistles says:


    Ruse to get some support back for the lame duck across the pond.

  297. 297
    albacore says:

    Is everybody happy? You bet your life we are!
    With the Parliament that we’ve got, ain’t we going far!
    You wouln’t trust those deadbeat bums alone to shovel shit
    For the one thing you’d be sure of – they’d drop us deep in it

  298. 298
    Jimmy says:

    You miss the point. Guido is trying to create the impression that he is prepared to be disloyal to a Murdoch minion without actually saying anything of substance.

  299. 299
    Miranda Hart-Dyke, not the Miranda you've been reading so much about lately, says:

    “…[N]ot enough midwives…”

    Oh no, you ain’ gittin’ me t’ do it!
    Ah jus’ plays one on the telly, ‘s all!
    Ah don’ knows nuthin’ ’bout birthin’ no babies!

  300. 300
    The Mad Bitch of Buenos Aires says:

    Good one!

    Except the “minion” left Murdoch’s employ some years earlier. Otherwise, nice try.

  301. 301
    Long John Silver's parrot says:

    So the French millionaire Foreign Minister is saying the evidence is clear that there was a chemical induced massacre in Syria yet he is keeping the evidence to himself.

    I am a Chinaman.

  302. 302
    Public Opinion doesnt matter in the UK says:

    To-day we have a demonstration of British Democracy at work…..a spokesman for the White House tells US Press Corps that the President will seek the approval of the Congress for military action in Syria…In Britain Cameron and Hague say that they “may” recall Parliament to debate the issue but after the action as Cameron can wage war/authorise military action by UK forces under the royal Prerogative . So there you have it…it doesn’t matter what the British public or two thirds of Parliament think

  303. 303
    Lord Sasserides says:

    And divided by zero.

  304. 304
    Lord Sasserides says:

    Brilliant observation that has me laughing.

  305. 305
    DAVE Fuckwit CAMERMONG says:

    Delete “Off together”

  306. 306
    Lord Sasserides says:

    The slopes should eviscerate the fuckers and make the world a better place.

  307. 307
    A Pissed Off non celebrating no diversity says:


  308. 308
    The tit soon to be booted out of no. 10 says:

    Where there is a will there is a bequest to my party.

  309. 309
    Rufus Stone says:

    “Whatever you do, don’t share that with anyone. Be very careful.” Obviously he was referring to Becky.

  310. 310
    Col Foster says:

    I hope there’s going to be plenty of totty in tight silver suits and purple hair on the Moon base.

  311. 311
    Common Sense says:

    Yes, then give Assad the co-ordinates.

  312. 312

    Jimmy you’re like one of those internet conspiracy theorists who hang out in blog comments…

  313. 313
    Cpt Cameron of the Westminster Riffles says:

    I’ll do the takin’, you do the dyin’

  314. 314
    Cast-Iron Guarantee says:

    If Guido had bothered to check out that docking station he might deduce it’s just a very short walk from St Mungo’s. Much better story.

  315. 315
    Al Lintheireds says:

    ‘chemically-induced’ is probably right though.

  316. 316
    Jimmy says:

    Your sucking up to the digger is a conspiracy theory? Considering some of your tinfoil tinged “scoops” that’s a bit rich.

  317. 317

    You love it, it keeps you coming back for more.

  318. 318
    Diddley says:

    He might just have been talking about an STD…….

  319. 319
    Jumbo says:

    You';re either in front of him, or behind

  320. 320
    broderick crawford says:

    Government To Appoint Bullshit Tsar

    THE government is to appoint a powerful new ‘czar’ to regulate the bullshit professions, including homeopathy, acupuncture and estate agency.
    The department for enterprise said the regulator’s remit will also cover public relations, marketing, advertising, finance and a wide range of diet-related bullshit.

    Tom Logan, labour market analyst at Donnelly-McPartlin, said: “At the moment anyone can join a bullshit profession or set themselves up as a bullshitter.

    “They simply rent an office, buy a bad suit and point at houses. Or they get a white coat and a chart of the human body, and then stick pins in your tongue, or claim they can cure cancer with some cheese, a teabag and a cucumber.”

    An enterprise department spokesman said: “While every profession is tainted with bullshit, we want to start by regulating those sectors that are founded on a solid core of pure bullshit.

    “The bullshit tsar’s first task will be to commission a firm of bullshitters to design a large building shaped like an upturned pram and then fill it with chancers who will spend the first year devising a series of slogans about bullshit.”

    He added: “Once we have picked a really good slogan the czar and his team will then draw up a series of bullshit qualifications that will mean absolutely fuck all.”

  321. 321
    Percy says:

    How on earth do you know?

  322. 322
    Percy says:

    You might have a point there

  323. 323
    Percy says:

    I don’t know the guy but from the pictures a year ago (remand time) if it is Coulson, he has put a lot weight and a lot it on his shoulders, could be the rear end of PS could be anyone

  324. 324
    Percy says:

    I hate to butt in your you personal spat you two but Murdoch probably has an interest in this blog at least for the time being, so what do want Geedes to do, he is always advertising on here his column in the Sun on Sunday. The Geedes is not a journo but he would dearly like to be one or even a politico, good luck to him if that is what he wants, at the moment he/they will probably always be known as that blogger chap.

  325. 325
    Percy says:

    Nige has just to do his gurning act and the Assad regime will tumble send him out, it will either make him or break him

  326. 326
    The Auld Leech says:

    Scum. Hope the creep rots in jail until he is a very old man!

  327. 327
    Bongo Ryan says:

    … badgering ghastly Cherie, again ?

  328. 328
    Kateesh'a says:

    Its udder-related .

  329. 329
  330. 330
  331. 331
    Beau Gwagwa says:

    What were they up to ? ?

  332. 332
    Halcyon says:

    What is it that makes Benedictine schools in England so attractive, so appealing ?

  333. 333

    It used to be a common theme when this blog started that Guido was a thwarted politician. After the expenses scandal people realised being an MP, under constant scrutiny and paid less than Neo-Guido, is a shit life. Journalists are being made redundant left, right and centre when not being arrested. Why would Guido want to be an underpaid employee? Being a blogger is a bit like being a journalist only better paid and with more job security. Don’t forget Guido owns the blog and all the advertising revenue. Don’t get Guido wrong, we love having the most read political column in the most read newspaper as well as the most read political blog. It is not just the money, the girls and the influence. It is the sheer freedom to be able to say “fuck you” to anyone we like from the PM down and they know it. It gives me more joy than you can believe to know that we drove Gordon Brown madder when he read the blog in Number 10. Priceless.

  334. 334
    John Prescott says:

    Now listen you posh little twit I was working as a ferry steward before you were even born or thought of so dont come it with me with your high falutin disdayn and all that palarva because its for the security that Im doing this so any more daft questions?

  335. 335
    Can we all vote UKIP now please? says:

    “Can that c*nt Cameron be any more useless?”

    It’s hard to see how, but I’m sure he will find a way.

  336. 336
    Jimmy says:

    Touched a nerve there. You’ll be posting a picture of your car next.

  337. 337

    Just setting the record straight.

  338. 338
    broderick crawford says:

    JEREMY Paxman is to present Newsnight dressed as a black man as he seeks an above inflation pay rise from the BBC.

    Paxman believes he can increase his £1 million a year salary by applying shoe polish to his face and interviewing politicians while impersonating the late Al Jolson.

    He told an audience at the Edinburgh Television Festival: “Most news readers these days are black women.

    “Trevor McDonald, George whatshisface, the guy that does News 24 on Sunday afternoons and, of course, Hugh Edwards.

    “Alright Hugh Edwards isn’t a black woman, but he is Welsh which is basically the same thing.”

    Media analyst Tom Logan said: “Jeremy Paxman has raised an important issue: Why the fuck is anyone still listening to this arsehole?

    “People seem to think he’s deep and intelligent because he asked Michael Howard if he threatened to overrule the head of the prison service 600 times in a row. I still reckon he was pissed.”

    Logan added: “If he’s not defiling University Challenge he’s writing to Marks and Sparks about his testicles like some kind of pervert freak.

    “And another thing, who the fuck keeps asking Jeremy Paxman to write books? I want names.”

  339. 339
    The Mad Muller (Cameroon) says:

    Launch the missles now, birmingham and leicester must be destroyed, once we evaucate londonistan we can continue.
    I thank you.

  340. 340
    Cannibal Leader Of the chemical attack brigade of jihadist martyrs says:

    Invade Syria now.

  341. 341
    Tom Catesby says:

    Coulson call intercepted…. can we expect more arrests?

  342. 342

    Cameron,Blair,Murdoch,Rebekah Brooks and Andy Coulsen are all in or were in the same swim,it’s in very murky waters attached to number 10 & Media Presentation.The Media’s lack of any unbiased reporting on the Syrian issue speaks volumes.Is it because of the MOD’s D notice or still the manipulation by Government and the Press to feed the Public encouraging BS to support the Governments intentions whether they be right or wrong.Anything of value or interest to the Public is either suppressed or withheld.Blair survived on this for years having daily meeting with Brooks at 10 Downing Street each morning.Whilst we were fed BS about Blair & his Intended Policies.Blair did the ground work for his Tory allies to implement when in Power.His private chats with Unum,which now the DWP is a subsidiary could not have taken place within the time the Tories have held the helm.”Were all in it together” BSB.

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Boris on British Jihadis. Apparently based on MI5 intel:

“If you look at all the psychological profiling about bombers, they typically will look at porn. They are literally w***ers. Severe onanists. They are tortured. They will be very badly adjusted in their relations with women, and that is a symptom of their feeling of being failures and that the world is against them. They are not making it with girls, and so they turn to other forms of spiritual comfort — which of course is no comfort.”

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