August 23rd, 2013

Quote of the Day

Victim’s solicitors allege that Mike Hancock MP…

“…exposed his penis and invited her to masturbate him.”


  1. 1
    The leader of the Camservative Party says:

    I say old beans, if I was to scrap HS2 anybody know how many Millenium Domes I could build up and down the land for the same money?

    • 6
      So far today, Dave has squandered £31,998,332.06 on our EU membership. says:

      80, give or take.

      But why not build 80 domes and the HS2?

      Go on, you know you want to.

      • 7
        The leader of the Camservative Party says:

        Now you have got me thinking. How about making every train station on the track a dome. Wouldn’t it be marvellous to walk off the train to be met by clowns, and jugglers.

        Oh no silly me I’m thinking about the Westminster stop.

  2. 2
    Clovis Marca says:

    The victim replied “Pop it behind me ear, I’ll smoke it later”

  3. 3
    Anonymous says:

    Interestingly this post was accompanied by an ad for a company offering to write Honours nominations for anyone – presumably for a fee. I wonder whether the ad targeting strategy was reacting to the words “Mike Hancock”? Strange if so.

  4. 4
    Victim Impact Statement says:

    Well it looked like a penis, only smaller.

  5. 8
    arden hooss says:

    reminds one of Dr Cameron in Dr Finlay’s Casebook

    Janet – tak o’er will you while i’m changing hands

  6. 9
    So far today, Dave has squandered £32,215,220.70 on our EU membership. says:

    And she declined?? I’m astonished. What young lady wouldn’t leap at the chance to jerk some old weirdy beardy’s gristly little todger?

  7. 9
    Tay King-dePisse says:

    Proving that he has always tried to live up to his name– ya think?
    Some jokes just write themselves, FFS!

  8. 11
    the girl next door says:

    i thought it was a snake
    so hit it with a rake…..

  9. 12
    where there's a will there's a brief says:

    is the witness sure of the identity of the honourable member?

  10. 13
    Handycock says:

    I had a hole in my pants, and it just sort of fell out.

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Guido-hot-button (1) Guido-hot-button (1)

Rod Liddle on the loony UN sexism special rapporteur:

“There is more sexism in Britain than in any other country in the world, according to a mad woman who has been sent here by the United Nations.

Rashida Manjoo is a part-time professor of law at Cape Town University in the totally non-sexist country of South Africa (otherwise known as Rape Capital Of The World).

Mrs Magoo has been wandering around with her notebook and is appalled by the sexist “boys’ club” culture here, apparently.

I don’t doubt we still have sexism in the UK. But is it worse than in, say, Saudi Arabia, d’you think, honey-lamb? Or about 175 other countries? Get a grip, you doolally old bat.”

orkneylad says:

What’s he been doing FFS, mining bitcoins?

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