August 22nd, 2013

When Front Pages Go Wrong

Spare a thought for the Daily Star today. They have splashed on the “shock secret love children” of Coronation Street actor Charlie Condou, sensationally revealing that he “secretly fathered two children with a straight girl pal”. Just the one problem. Unfortunately Condou’s kids were less than secret, he wrote a column devoted to them in the Guardian for a year.

In their defence, it’s not like anyone would have read it…


79 Comments

  1. 1
    Owen Jones says:

    Better to have loved and lost, than to sit naked, crying into a half eaten Pot Noodle.

  2. 2
    Casual Observer says:

    Of course this could be a broadside at the Guardian.

    ie. Making the case that no one except the Guy News Team (kudos) reads that rag anymore ;-)

  3. 3
    alexei says:

    The bra and pants dont match either!

  4. 4
    Owen's Mum says:

    Ahh, my poor wee munchkin :( Come here for a big cuddle!

  5. 5
    jimbooo says:

    Anyone else notice how relentlessly the elite are busily redefining patriotism as celebrating immigr4tion (everywhere else called e_t_h_n_i_c c_l_e_a_n_s_i_n_g_) and multi-culti nothingness, i.e unpatriotic things – pure 1984 style new-speak, and they are far more ruthless in demanding adherence to it than the old real patriots ever were – remember the hysterical reaction to any who pointed out what a crock of shit the olmypic opening ceremony was.

    Sooner or later they’ll re-write God Save the Queen to omit references to the Queen but to celebrate feminism and immigr4tion – that day every guardian reader will be demanding all children are forced to sing it.

  6. 6
    a politician says:

    their contents do

  7. 7
    RED ED - SON OF BROWN says:

    I WILL win the next eleggtion !!

  8. 8
    what the elite really think says:

    @chelseaboy1971 There shouldn't be any such thing as an 'illegal' immigrant. All should be legal.— Katy Brand (@KatyFBrand) August 1, 2013

  9. 9
    an atheist says:

    will they exclude god too?

    at the moment the anthem’s saving grace (sic) is its opening premise

    so the a change could be dangerous

  10. 10
    Anal Turkey Baster says:

    One day Owen you may have little ones.

  11. 11
    BBC PR Dept says:

    we do!

  12. 12
    Redtop Editor says:

    Fortunately for me, our readers can be continually surprised by the same story.

  13. 13
    Elton John says:

    Who is Charlie Condou?

    And is this yet another gayer selfishly messing about with turkey basters and baby manufacturers to produce children he would/should not otherwise produce?

  14. 14
    Herman van Rumpboy says:

    NEIN, NEIN, NEIN !

  15. 15
    Ed 'shhhhh' Balls says:

    Ed Miliband is doing an adequate job under difficult circumstances. For someone who was unexpectedly, even by himself, thrust into the leadership of the Labour party he has managed not to make many mistakes. His achievements should be given the respect they actually deserve. Whatever that may be.

    I loyally support the labour party and all will stand shoulder to shoulder with Mr Miliband until the day he resigns or he is somehow no is longer leader. Whichever is the sooner.

    In the meantime, whilst I am keeping a low profile, watching the box-set of Game of Thrones, I will not join the many, many,many other Labour MPs who have attacked the labour leader and instead confine myself to saying he is the right man for the immediate situation.

    Ed Balls
    Shadow Chancer.

  16. 16
    Aux Armes, Citoyens! says:

    GSTQ is a dirge. The Welsh, French, Portuguese and Italian anthems knock it into a cocked hat.

  17. 17
    Lord John Prescott says:

    I like to have a pie in every finger.

  18. 18
    Ed Balls - Shallow Chancer says:

  19. 19
    GMG delivery driver says:

    Alright mate! Do you want this truckload of newspapers delivered to the foyer or shall I chuck ‘em straight into the recycling?

  20. 20
    Run up the black flag says:

    I’ve got a large Jolly Roger flying in my garden.

  21. 21
    Londonistan Flag says:

  22. 22
    Ruskin College Oxford says:

    Why are you so nasty to us.

    We gave you your start in life.

  23. 23
    Sally Barecow says:

    That’s a coincidence. I like to have a finger in my pie.

  24. 24
    Yvette Triple Flipper says:

    Ooh this is making me moist.

  25. 25
    Bollocks to modding says:

    God to be replaced with Allah for starters.

  26. 26
    Chemical Castration says:

    +1

  27. 27
    Bollocks to modding says:

    Not so much bat man as fat man.

  28. 28
    Sally *butterface* says:

    In fact the other night I said to johnnie “Take your ring off it’s hurting” to which he replied “It’s my watch”

  29. 29
    Sally *butterface* says:

    And his trusty sidekick Empty Ed

  30. 30
    Owen Jones says:

    The gifting of extravagant moon cakes is contrary to the original sentiment of the Chinese Mid-Autumn Festival – China People’s Daily.

  31. 31
    Bollocks to modding says:

    GCHQ read it, they like to find out all the latest info. Saves them saving to do anything and can play space invaders the rest of the day.

  32. 32
    Chris "pants" Bryant says:

    oooooohh

  33. 33
    Owen Jones says:

    ME ME ME

  34. 34
    Len McCluskey says:

    Bend over and look eager Owen, I’m arriving

  35. 35
    Corrie rapper, AKA Vanilla Shite, AKA 50 Pence, AKA Diminem, AKA MC Twatter says:

  36. 36
    Owen Jones Mother says:

    Owen behave yourself or no more internet today.

  37. 37
    P l e b says:

    The Daily Star. Not a newspaper but a propaganda rag for Dirty Desmond’s other shit.

  38. 38
    Owen Jones says:

    There is not enough LGBT stories and characters in Corrie.

  39. 39
    Ellie-Mae (8) says:

    dork.

  40. 40
    Ellie-Mae (8) says:

    Has that jerk been passed by CRB?

  41. 41
    GCHQ says:

    That was posted that on the last thread.

    Spambot ?

  42. 42
    Irony 101 says:

    In their defence, it’s not like anyone would have read it…

    Um… you did?

  43. 43
    Dopey D Cameron says:

    Let’s do it, let’s celebrate how enriched modern Britain has become. We can’t tolerate this racist/sexist relic existing in the 21st century. Praise be to Allah, peace be upon him.

  44. 44
    The Caring Co-Op - Close Protection Unit says:

    It’s OK that child has been cleared to sit next to Ed, please don’t call him a jerk.

  45. 45
    Tony Blair, Mass Murderer, Esq says:

    What is important is is what is important is is what is important is is important is is what is important is is what is important is is important is is what is important is is what is important is is important is is what is important is is what is important is is important is is what is important is is what is important is is important is is what is important is is what is important is is important is is what is important is is what is important is is important is is what is important is is what is important is is important is is what is important is is what is important is is important is is what is important is is what is important is is important is is what is important is is what is important is is important is is what is important is is what is important is is important is is what is important is is what is important is is important is is what is important is is what is important is is important is is what is important is is what is important is is important is is what is important is is what is important is is important is is what is important is is what is important is is important is is what is important is is what is important is is important is is what is important is is what is important is is important is is what is important is is what is important is is important is is what is important is is what is important is is important is is what is important is is what is important is is important is is what is important is is what is important is is important is is what is important is is what is important is is important is is what is important is is what is important is is important is is what is important is is what is important is is important is is what is important is is what is important is is important is is what is important is is what is important is is important is is what is important is is what is important is is important is is what is important is is what is important is is important is is what is important is is what is important is is important is is what is important is is what is important is is important is is what is important is is what is important is is important is is what is important is is what is important is is important is is what is important is is what is important is is important is is what is important is is what is important is is important is is what is important is is what is important is is important is is what is important is is what is important is is important is is what is important is is what is important is is important is is what is important is is what is important is is important is is what is important is is what is important is.

  46. 46
    Guardian reading lefty says:

    How dare you, me and the rest of the Islington Soviet read it.

  47. 47
    Guido says:

    I had a minion recite it out loud to me.

  48. 48
    Propaganda Watch says:

    Another day, another photo op, another window into the depths that Labour dragged the UK down to.

  49. 49
    Paniagua v5 says:

    AKA Out of Work.

  50. 50
    Gaydo's on my gaydar says:

    Bitch

  51. 51
    Owen Jones' mum says:

    Then try watching Emmerdale, dear.

  52. 52
    Ex Beer Drinker says:

  53. 53
    Praecis says:

    Chilcot.

  54. 54
    Gaydo's on my gaydar says:

    It’s also hideously heterosexual – it must include more LGBT references.

  55. 55
    Call me Dave says:

    You’re right of course.

  56. 56
    Propaganda Watch says:

    Odd story from Ch!na Peoples Daily, Ch!na’s nationalist answer to the Mail.

    Is the economy over there doing badly ?

  57. 57
    Charles Darwin says:

    Since the dawn of history the Negro has owned the continent of Africa – rich beyond the dream of poet’s fancy, crunching acres of diamonds beneath his bare black feet and yet he never picked one up from the dust until a white man showed to him its glittering light. His land swarmed with powerful and docile animals, yet he never dreamed a harness, cart, or sled. A hunter by necessity, he never made an axe, spear, or arrowhead worth preserving beyond the moment of its use. He lived as an ox, content to graze for an hour.

    In a land of stone and timber he never sawed a foot of lumber, carved a block, or built a house save of broken sticks and mud. With league on league of ocean strand and miles of inland seas, for four thousand years he watched their surface ripple under the wind, heard the thunder of the surf on his beach, the howl of the storm over his head, gazed on the dim blue horizon calling him to worlds that lie beyond, and yet he never dreamed a sail.

  58. 58
    Joss Taskin says:

    How’s that ‘Middle East Peace Envoy’ thing going, Mr. B£iar ??

  59. 59
    Diane Fatbott says:

    Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaciiiiiist !!!

  60. 60
    Mighty Whitey says:

    You white men may have it up there, but us black boys have got it down here.

  61. 61
    Owen Jones says:

    Emmerdale is like totally racist mum, it will be the first TV program to go when the mighty red revolution takes power. Up the workers, power to the people!

    By the way mum do we have any more of that ginger beer left?

  62. 62
    Guardian reading lefty says:

    Us evil white people must never forget how terrible we haved treated the blacks.

  63. 63
    Sir William Waid says:

    Sub-Saharn Africa developed civilisations to roughly To the level of classical antiquity in the Near East and the Medierranean, but these tended to be overwhelmed by contactbwith the Arabs and, later, Europeans.

  64. 64
    Guardian reading lefty says:

    Wayist

  65. 65
    Robin, the Catamite Companion to the Caped Crusader, says:

    Holy hideousness, Batman!

    It’s our nemesis– The Stutterer!

  66. 66
    Racist Bob says:

    I would argue they did even fully manage classical, certainly not in mathematics, science and philosophy.

  67. 67
    Percy says:

    “Coronation Street actor Charlie Condou I don’t watch that rubbish and I have never heard of him, boring!

  68. 68
    Percy says:

    They probably are not allowed to read this blog during worktime, they are probably way in front of Geedes away

  69. 69
    Percy says:

    It a song praising the current monarch of the time

  70. 70
    Percy says:

    He maybe Fat but Pickles much, much fatter

  71. 71
    Anonymous says:

    Greedo bites the hand that fed him.

    Typical ungrateful Tory bastard.

  72. 72
    Percy says:

    They used to say that about the Sun, they used to say Trading Standards was taking them to court as they had registered at the Post Office as a newspaper

  73. 73
    Percy says:

    Well he’s burned his boat, if Murdoch rounds on him ………

  74. 74
    10.4 highway patrol says:

    …. and your point anjem ?

  75. 75
    10.4 highway patrol says:

    yes ed , you may well be standing shoulder to shoulder but that is not the same as being four square in front of your leader .

    in other words have you assumed the mandatory position on all fours , anus proffered ?

  76. 76
    10.4 highway patrol says:

    i think the jerk reference was in reference to ed ….. who incidentally looks more frightening without the mask when the whites of his swivelly slightly jeff bezos eyes can be seen in all their paranoid detail .

  77. 77
    Wonga says:

    Who is the shy girl on the front page?

  78. 78
    Owens Dad says:

    Fuck off son, don’t come home until you man up & have a girlfriend instead of a boyfriend.

  79. 79
    Owens Dad says:

    Fuck off son, don’t come home until you man up & have a girlfriend instead of a boyfriend.


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