August 15th, 2013

New No.10 Head of News

The Number 10 comms team is getting beefed up with Scot Marchbank, the Head of News at the Ministry of Justice moving over to become Head of News and a deputy to Jean-Christophe Gray. A Whitehall source describes Marchbank, who cut his teeth at the Home Office as “hardcore…with a good reputation”.  Just that Press Secretary role to fill now….


94 Comments

  1. 1
    Wow says:

    Its official the recession is over.

  2. 2
    Wolverine says:

    Jean Grey.

    Isn’t she that telepath of the X-Men?

  3. 3
    Vote LibLabCon says:

    - If you want criminally minded neighbors with funny accents who will price you out the workforce and give you TB.

  4. 4
    Speed Reader says:

    Bit bad saying you can clean if you fail your A levels. What are the immies gonna do?

  5. 5
    RK says:

    A roll from Greggs?

  6. 6
    Reality says:

    Immigrunts could be great for medical research.

  7. 7
    Diana Abbott says:

    Good luck to those getting ‘A’ level results today and for those who didn’t because they died as a result of a stabbing.Never mind.
    There’s always reincarnation.

  8. 8
    Anti-Rentier Alliance says:

    I bet Guido has applied for it!

  9. 9
    Just Wondering says:

    My FTSE 100 page is all red today, has somebody said anything untoward that I might have missed?

  10. 10
    Urban Fox says:

    That’s all I need.Fucking Badgers living next door.

  11. 11
    broderick crawford says:

    ” hardcore … with a good reputation ” ??

    does that mean he is a linda lovelace version of malcolm tucker ??

  12. 12
    Chris Bryant says:

    Does he have a gag reflex?

  13. 13
    LOL says:

    Brilliant comment on the Telegraph in reply to what lefties should tweet …

    1. Your tweets about poverty must be sent from an iPhone.

    2. Condemn those who doesn’t share your opinion as trolls.

    3. Inform those to the right of Stalin that they’re Nazis.

    4. You must ignore sexism, homophobia and racism if it comes from a Muslim.

    5. You must retweet Laurie Penny at least once a day.

    6. When you lose an argument with someone on the right you must insult them before blocking them.

    7. You must attack UKIP at least once an hour, having the foggiest idea of what UKIP is isn’t a requirement.

    8. Threaten to call the police when you see a tweet that hasn’t originated from within the left wing hivemind.

    9. Don’t call for the abolition of private schools until your children have left.

    10. Blame Thatcher.

  14. 14
    Sir Mary Flappes says:

    Rolling with a PS could have terrible repercussions.

  15. 15
    Stephanie Flanders says:

    Apart from my usual talking down the economy report I’ve heard nothing.

  16. 16
    Deport this cunt says:

    This man is the enemy within. Someone Owen Jones calls one of the greatest journalists in the country.

    Let’s see what this great journalist says in private:

  17. 17
    JMF says:

    You forgot condemn Israel at least once a week by calling for boycotts

  18. 18
    The Diary of Owen Jones aged 13 3/4 says:

    The great hope for the left that was Ed Miliband seems to have evaporated.

    I am feeling low and sad and quite depressed when I think of the uphill struggle the revolution faces before it can ever form a council of the worker’s parliament

    But on the upside Mum says we are going to Throrpe Park Saturday..Yeah!

  19. 19
    Ex Beer Drinker says:

  20. 20
    The Diary of Owen Jones aged 13 3/4 says:

    AMERICA IS SATAN..tweet that once a day for extra cred.

  21. 21
    Mornington Crescent says:

    …and if that fails, you can always be a SpAd.

  22. 22
    Mong Watch says:

    Medhi the Mong getting it wrong on muzzies and the moral high ground.

    Who’d a thunk that ?

  23. 23
    Real Bloke #376451 says:

    The tories can play around with their roles and their ministers all they like, they’ll still be Quislings, they’ll still be increasing immigration, they’ll still be increasing taxes, they’ll still be devaluing the currency, they’ll still be hammering annuities, and I’ll still be voting UKIP.

  24. 24
    Ed Miliband says:

    Or the shadow leader

  25. 25
    Mong Watch says:

    And paradoxically tweet about how great Obama is, pbuh.

  26. 26
    Fatbot hypocrite says:

    No mention then on Mugabe grabbing all the white owned business in Zimbabwe then . You know tat divide and rule thingy

  27. 27
    Diane Abbotapotumus says:

    Wacist

  28. 28
    Fatbot hypo says:

    Is that words to a pop song?

  29. 29
    Unless UKIP get 326 seats says:

    Vote UKIP get hard labour

  30. 30
    Owen Jones says:

    Mehdi has got a closet I can hide in when all the stoning begins.

  31. 31
    Not so sure says:

    Hard labour? is that blue or red Labour then?

  32. 32
    JMF says:

    “Laa ilaaha Ilallah” is that he chorus of one of the Beach boys numbers?

  33. 33
    Mary says:

    Let he who is with or without sin cast the first stone.

  34. 34
    Anti-Rentier Alliance says:

    US jobless down = bad as it increases chances of Fed tapering (free money for wall street), then the Phillie Fed figures came in below expectations = Good so the Fed free money tree can keep on giving.

  35. 35
    Gawd Help Us says:

    I’m sure it’s an opening line from a Teletubbies episode.

  36. 36
    The Diary of Owen Jones aged 13 3/4 says:

    The great hope for the left that was Ed Miliband seems to have ended.

    I am feeling low and sad and when I think of the uphill struggle the revolution faces before it can succeed. I could weep ..

    But on the upside Mum says we are going to Throrpe Park Saturday..Yeah!

  37. 37
    The Diary of Owen Jones aged 13 3/4 says:

    Thorpe

  38. 38
    UKIP minister for women says:

    Women are all a bit silly and need to stay at home knitting and not worry about having careers.
    Ladies, there are plenty of magazines with pictures of celebs you can read all day.
    Or why not try learning singing and dancing to entertain your man when he arrives home from the office.

    Now..less fussing and more quilt making!

  39. 39
    Peter, Paul, Matthew, James, Mark, Luke Etc says:

    Jesus!

  40. 40
    Money Grubbers says:

    OT: Never mind Diane Abbott charging £1750 for a speech to students. How the hell does Jon Snow think a speech by him is worth £7000?

    http://www.trendingcentral.com/anti-tuition-fees-mp-charges-students-1750-for-university-speech/

    What does he eulogise on, the merits of wearing garish socks that make one look like a pretentious tw*t?

  41. 41
    Dave says:

    Don’t throw stones in upper class houses

  42. 42
  43. 43
    Ed Miliband says:

    Yarp.

  44. 44
    Jon Snows Timex says:

    £7k will buy me a new Rolex

  45. 45
    Bob Crow says:

    Peeple in Glas carncil arzes shudnt throw stonz

  46. 46
    Rinka woof says:

    Liberal, Bessel, Scott, and see ‘Possible Involvement of Jack Straw’ in link

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jeremy_Thorpe

  47. 47
    Just Wondering says:

    Many thanks.

  48. 48
    Simon B says:

    Of course the recession is over, the Conservatives are in Power. Sometimes I do think democracy is overrated: if they had any stomach they would outlaw the Labour party itself (but not the LimbDumbs, as they’re totally ineffectual and, let’s face it, good for a laugh.)

    Next time those Labour public sector scroungers go on strike and protest, we should do to them what Egypt just did to their very own Enemies Within. Thatcher’s only mistake was to not crush the unions in their entirety.

  49. 49
    Tachybaptus says:

    Bunnies can and will go down the drain.

  50. 50
    Lefty student says:

    Bradley Wiggins is a hero for hacking the USA military industrial complex and giving a data card to willyleaks.

    And he’s transgenderist. A bloody hero that Bradley Wiggins is

  51. 51
    I am Spazticus says:

    Simon, fancy joining our show?

  52. 52
    Ed Moribund says:

    You know what? .. I’m thinking of packing it all in.

  53. 53
    Engineer says:

    In other news, some bloke has been appointed Production Director of a medium-sized West Midlands engineering firm nobody has ever heard of, and a woman in Yorkshire has been appointed Manager of a branch of a well-known chain of high-street stores.

  54. 54
    Stephanie Flanders says:

    Don’t listen to him I know what’s going on because I’m in the fruit loop with Ed Balls.

  55. 55
    Simon B says:

    Sorry, I didn’t find that programme funny at all. These “people” who go around playing tricks on healthy people is like snobbery in reverse. We can’t take the mick out of invalids and nutters any more, but they can take the mick out of those who have all our limbs and a fully functioning mind? Another example of ZaNuLieBore thought control, where two legs is bad but any one-legged lesbian mental patient is actively championed and promoted. Of course I’m a white heterosexual male, so I’m the most discriminated section of society.

    Thank the lord the Tories have ATOS dealing with these “people”.

  56. 56
    BBC says:

    As this sounds like progress (UK rather than EU that is), we will pass thanks.

  57. 57
    Engineer says:

    How are things in Labour Rapid Rebuttal these days? A bit boring I’d imagine, especially since that nice Mr Tom Watson had to resign for being dodgy.

  58. 58
    Joss Taskin says:

    Allan SWT ? Is that Allan Slide, the cause of delays on South West Trains in very bad weather ? Unite won’t help, that’s for sure. Wrong union, innit ?

  59. 59
    ATOS says:

    Congratulations Simon B, you pass with 2:1 honors

  60. 60
    Bystander says:

    Can they find a job for “The Hairy Cornflake”

  61. 61
    Gorgon Brown says:

    You are not the Gorgonites last hope….there is another.

  62. 62
    Engineer says:

    Don’t worry. I’m sure Stuart Wheeler or Geoffrey Bloom will be along shortly to say something eminently sensible that you can twist into a supposedly sexist comment.

  63. 63
    Return of the Blink eye says:

    Are you talking about me master?

  64. 64
    Simon B says:

    I hope the Good Mr. Murdoch finds something on Fatson and he is either wholly disgraced or, even better, locked up for the rest of his life. People like him don’t belong anywhere in the public sphere.

  65. 65
    and don't tweet... says:

    Brown/balls/miliband Treasury economic performance
    RBS, HBOS, Northern Rock, B&Bingley
    Comapny Pensions
    Future Energy provision
    Overseas Military Adventures
    NEETs, Long Term Sick, Europe, Common Purpose

  66. 66
    Another arsehole says:

    While Jean-Christophe Gray. Is a bag of shite!

  67. 67
    Engineer says:

    Well, I suppose he IS a public sphere…

  68. 68
    If you can't oppress it,cover it in acid says:

    Let’s see what Labours fellow travellers in Bradford have to say about women.

  69. 69
    Simon B says:

    Why would anyone pay £7k for a watch? I wouldn’t be seen dead wearing one that was worth less than £20k.

  70. 70
    Engineer says:

    Mine cost twenty quid. Seems to work alright.

  71. 71
    Simon B says:

    You obviously have no class and don’t care what your image says about you.

    Just like those filthy soap-dodging commies.

  72. 72
    Simon B says:

    This is why anyone who has left-wing opinions should be seen as subversive to Western interests and put in prison. The left-wing rot set in when this country allowed people to form unions. Ban them now and charge anyone who tries to form one with criminal conspiracy.

  73. 73
    stun says:

    Cheats at Scrabble too.

  74. 74
    A Free Man says:

    Only twats and servants wear watches. I have no need for a watch. I am a free man.

  75. 75
    Engineer says:

    According to Lord Prescott (when he was still Two-Jags), we’re all middle class now, so I do have a class. Same as everybody else.

    Anyway, I’m a northerner, so the twenty quid watch fits nicely with the flat cap and the whippet.

  76. 76
    The Town Drunk says:

    He’s pisshhed

  77. 77
    Ed Twelvety Balls says:

    Please do! I want to be leader!

  78. 78
    It's enjoyable to see racists get beat silly says:

  79. 79
    Dougie says:

    “Just that Press Secretary roll to fill now….”

    I’ve seen filled rolls advertised in cafes but it’s usually ham or BLT. Never yet seen a Press Secretary roll.

    Or did Guido mean role …?

  80. 80
    DIanne Bagerbot says:

    The situation is not simply black and white you know

  81. 81
    John Cleese at the public stoning says:

    Who threw that? I didn’t say start! Come on who was it?

  82. 82
    Judges 'ammer says:

    Sky news reporting DLT under arrest on 11 counts. When did we move to the ” counts” word instead of “charges”

  83. 83
  84. 84
    jockey jim says:

    just how many of these bumfodder cretins do we have to pay for

  85. 85
    Airey Belvoir says:

    Yes, ‘Press Secretary roll” FFS. Guido’s minions are getting more sloppy and ignorant by the day.

  86. 86
    Real Bloke #376451 says:

    Makes no difference whether tories or labour win – they are the same.

  87. 87
    rent boy says:

    I already give you a 10% discount, what are you whining about?

  88. 88
    Naturalist says:

    It’s the noise they make when they’re mating, and the crashing about all over the place. Far better culled.

  89. 89
    BBC Dynasties inc: Attenboroughs, Dimblebies, Snows et al says:

    I’m guessing he might talk on the successful deployment of nepotism as a strategy to building a dynastic fortune.

  90. 90
    A pedant who gets off work 2hrs 45mins after this guy... says:

    Damn it!

  91. 91
    inside out says:

    Wait until after the court cases of Sun journalists,then the floodgates will open. All the sleaze collected over the years on our “elite leaders” will be discharged.Squeaky Bum time for quite a few I think!

  92. 92
    robbie says:

    with a Lorne suasage ?

  93. 93
    Prodnose says:

    Rolexes are so vulgar as to be disgusting! Naffest bling anywhere.

  94. 94
    Vuvuzelas R Us says:

    Mdehdi Hasan= complete knob!


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Boris on British Jihadis. Apparently based on MI5 intel:

“If you look at all the psychological profiling about bombers, they typically will look at porn. They are literally w***ers. Severe onanists. They are tortured. They will be very badly adjusted in their relations with women, and that is a symptom of their feeling of being failures and that the world is against them. They are not making it with girls, and so they turn to other forms of spiritual comfort — which of course is no comfort.”


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