August 7th, 2013

The Rebel Alliance Form South of France Hotel Pact

Lord Ashcroft’s ability to troll the Prime Minister knows no ends. When he’s not pouring claret down Tom Watson’s throat he’s lunching another former insider Cameron threw to the wolves:

Not a menacing picture, at all…


  1. 1
    Bill Quango MP says:

    I was at that hotel just a week ago. I Recommend the fruit de mer and the chambermaid for the first floor.

  2. 2
    Sleazo Paines says:

    I believe our ‘Arry’s dog is going to join them after visiting Monaco to deal with the latest rake offs from QPR transfers….

  3. 3
    Sunblock says:

    Not exactly holiday attire. Where are the knotted hankies?

  4. 4
    Tory MP says:

    Is the chambermaid an underage boy?

  5. 5
    Call me Dave says:

    Peter says I should try the fruit de merde its simply divine.

  6. 6
    Dominique Strauss-Kahn says:

    +1 on the maid

  7. 7
    Call me Dave says:

    £250k for a lunch !! No chance.

  8. 8
    UKIP says:

    What, no fruitcake?

  9. 9
    Tory MP says:

    Arriving soon. Ebenezer Hague will soon be with them, bringing an assortment of Yorkshire treats, including knotted hankies, black pudding and whippets (sorry – my mistake – apparently he is bringing whips).

  10. 10
    Loyalty says:

    It’ll cost you more than that in the end, you silly boy

  11. 11
    Tory MP says:

    It has all been sent to Bongo Bongo land.

  12. 12
    Travis Perkins delivery team says:

    Where shall I put the wrestlers mud mate?

  13. 13
    Silvio Strauss-Johnson says:

    +2 on the maid……..always knew I’d find a use for a whiff whaff table.

  14. 14
    Call me Dave says:

    I prefer bunga bunga land

  15. 15
  16. 16
    Popeye says:

    Ding-Dong Dave?

  17. 17
    Postcard from the edge says:

    Helpful rich tory tip #5

    You need at least 6 gays to form a circle.

  18. 18
    Tory MP says:

    As do UKIP, as evidenced by their alliance with Silvio’s main supporters, the Northern League, in the EFD parliamentary group.

  19. 19
    Ian Dishslop says:

    They make a lovely couple!
    But which one is the bride???

  20. 20
    Simon B says:

    If you can’t afford £250k for a lunch then you are obviously one of life’s losers, probably still using a bus when in your mid-30s.

    For some of us, £250k isn’t all that much money.

  21. 21
    Bill Quango MP says:

    That’s not very LGBT of you Simon B.

  22. 22
    A view from atop the pyramid says:

    From Dave’s point of view, that is perhaps the most sinister dinner invite ever.

    In the distance one can here Machiavelli applauding.

    (Lord A’s Books – Well worth download from his site, and well worth reading.)

  23. 23
    PPE Degree and nowt else says:

    You sad fuck

  24. 24
    Obvious says:

    Both of them.

  25. 25
    Scumbags in Westminster says:

    We don’t hold parties’ alliances against them.

    After all, Labour were in an alliance with the nototious torturer Hosni Mubarak’s National Democratic Party for years as fellow members of the Socialist International.

  26. 26
    Tory MP says:

    Not quite the most sinister. That would be if Cashbox also invited his Colombian and Mexican amigos. Chainsaws anyone?

  27. 27
    Have Pity on Interns says:

    He thinks the k stands for Kenya.

  28. 28
    EU Funded Pro-EU Troll says:

    Vote UKIP

  29. 29
    average joanna says:

    If I had as much money as these two I couldn’t be arsed with all this grief.
    Isn’t life too short?

  30. 30
    Casual Observer says:

    Or if Farage was taking the picture.

  31. 31
    Silvio Strauss-Johnson says:

    I believe that Mubarak’s tortures are somewhat less cruel than the sight of Silvio’s exposed rear end at a bunga bunga party. Either UKIP have strong stomachs or they have simply become acclimatised to perverse sexual behaviour through their beloved leader.

  32. 32
    Sleazo Paines says:

    I already do vote UKIP. I am in Jeremy Hunt’s seat and he is undoubtedly a Useless Kinky Impotent Prat.

  33. 33
    Daily Mail reader says:

    OMG niether of them is wearing a safety harnes on the deck of that boat!!! Completely inappropriate and unacceptable behavour. They should apologise and resin, end of.

  34. 34
    Sleazo Paines says:

    Even the Colombians and Mexicans would think twice about that level of cruelty.

  35. 35
    excellent piano says:

    Exactly. Which makes you wonder why Dave has decided to piss them both off so much. He must have other more lucrative schemes on the go…

  36. 36
    Hopeless Ed Miliband says:

    Wish someone would take me to lunch. Justine has made me Dairylea sandwiches again today and she’s forgotten to cut the crusts off. Would it kill her to do that?

  37. 37
    Michelin Guide says:

    The cutlery at the Hotel du Cap is somewhat fine and noted for its sharpness.

  38. 38
    Sleazo Paines says:

    I am not sure about the apology but I hear that both are always willing to resin up, especially when Poxy Foxy and Verity Werrity join them.

  39. 39
    Brussels says:

    Strasbourg can de-sensitize a chap

  40. 40
    Silvio Strauss-Johnson says:

    No, but just like Gideon, short trousers and a thorough waxing can achieve a passing resemblance.

  41. 41
    Hopeless Ed Miliband says:

    Has anyone seen the Labour front bench? I misplaced them several months ago and can’t seem to find them anywhere. Anyone would think they were hiding from me…

  42. 42
    I hate racists says:

    Will they be visiting Bongo Bongo land too?

  43. 43
    BOB CROW says:

    Yeh Ashcroft you fat tory bastard , get fackin beer in

  44. 44

    I’m on a Zero Hour contract at Westminster

  45. 45
    Len McCluskey says:

    Ey Bob, I use that Miliband boy as a pot stand

  46. 46
    Lord Arsecroft. says:

    Tories need to learn not to walk for nought. Lord Ashcroft is creating more problems for the Tories than anyone else. Anyone would think he is a Labour man! Ashcroft in bed with the unions! His ego comes before politics! Silly, silly man.

  47. 47
    The Butler says:

    I shall pass on your kind regards to his Lordship. Who shall I say called?

  48. 48
    JadedJean says:

    The Anti-CamIntern Pact?

  49. 49
    jonah says:

    Not quite…zero hours with full pay.

  50. 50
    Living in 97.223% white Merseyside says:

    UKIP are losing their grip. They are beginning to cave in to the political brigade too easily. One of their MEP’s makes a harmless remark and Nige orders a full enquiry.

    No different to LIBLABCON!

  51. 51
    Another Daily Mail reader says:

    OMG your right!!!! It is very dangerous and a totally unacceptible example to other boat users especially where children are involved. They should be lock up and the key thrown to Cameron who should of introduced a law against this kind of irresponsable behaviour.

  52. 52
    Living in 97.223% white Merseyside says:

    I meant politically correct brigade.

  53. 53
    Kernow says:

    They’re all in their holiday homes.
    You know, the second homes they own in desirable parts of the country
    which they only use for a few weeks a year.
    Meaning local people can’t afford inflated prices to get on the housing
    ladder and local businesses suffer as the demand is seasonal.
    I’m sure the BBC would love to do a programme about it- if only so many
    of their own staff weren’t second home owners…

  54. 54
    Pilgrim says:

    That’s my kind of contract.

  55. 55
    Cornish Pilchard says:

    They are all on holiday

  56. 56
    Anonymous says:

    You seem to have an unhealthy obsession with men in short trousers, do see you GP !

  57. 57
    Anonymous says:

    You must admit nobody does disloyal as well as Lord Ashcroft !

  58. 58
    Ed Balls says:


  59. 59
    Anonymous says:

    I dont think anybody has to worry about Cruddas, third rater that he is !

  60. 60
    Ed Balls says:

    I’ve lost track of time……..I can’t move………it feels as though my mind is outside my body…….

  61. 61
    Anonymous says:

    Nothing wrong with calling the third world “Bong Bongo land ” oh wait ——

  62. 62
    Idon'tneednodoctor says:

    I wish I was a fiver behind either of them. Lucky bastards.

  63. 63
    Watcher says:

    Yes, he seems to be a one man party. His statements certainly don’t ring with UKIP support, seems more of an EU apparatchick these days than a Real Conservative. I suppose it’s the big multinational business game he’s too wrapped up in.

  64. 64
    Anonymous says:

    One of the ukip lot made a statement on the “Bongo Bongo Land “situation earlier, and oddly enough managed to bring Pubs in to the conversation!

  65. 65
    Idon'tneednodoctor says:

    Just thought I would tell those that don’t already know, bongo bongo land doesn’t really exist. Now Father Christmas is real enough.

  66. 66
    Sir William Waid says:

    I prefer the Beach Hotel – a better position and fewer bigwigs.

  67. 67
    Guardian reader says:

    If there was any justice in the world these bastards would be eating cold baked beans as millions of poor and disabled people have to do as a direct result of being viciously attacked by this Tory government.

  68. 68
    Watcher says:

    One wonders whether it’s simply that he sees Dave as too weak and simply wants to replace him with someone stronger but still on the left.

  69. 69
    Anonymous says:

    Is the fat one the Bride ?

  70. 70
    Dianne Abbott says:

    Bongo bongo land mothers would go to the wall for their kids.

  71. 71
    Anonymous says:

    But he is becoming like your drunk Uncle at family do`s, always embarassing and making a pratt of himself, you have to look away !

  72. 72
    His Excellency the Bongonian High Commissioner says:

    Nenda kajitombe!

  73. 73
    Anonymous says:

    I think Nigel is in Bongo Bongo land !

  74. 74
    A GP says:

    Call NHS Direct. We don’t want to see anyone who might be ill.

  75. 75
    Britain says:

    Cameron and the band of anti-British traitors he calls a cabinet far surpasses Ashcroft when it comes to disloyalty.

  76. 76
    Diane Abbott eats to many creamcakes says:

    You would go through a wall to eat loads of cream cakes.

  77. 77
    Watcher says:

    I waited. And as you say, there is nothing wrong in the expression.

  78. 78
    Hackney's sewerage system requests your help says:

    Di’s problem is not bongo-bongo but gumbo-gumbo [New Orleans’ cuisine]
    She is eating herself into an early grave.
    As a concerned citizen, I wish she would think about her health.
    Awaiting the eventual passing of Mandela and the expected faux hysteria and orchestrated mourning of the BBc and the usual suspects, am not sure the country could take another ‘blick icon’, departing this mortal coil in so short a time span.

  79. 79
    The savant 10.4 highway patrol says:

    i do like a well turned female ankle serving me at breakfast .

  80. 80
    The savant 10.4 highway patrol says:

    ‘ooo,s that . ? you mean my dog rosie ?
    Rosie Lea nice cuppa tea ???

  81. 81
    The savant 10.4 highway patrol says:

    wot … is he brown bread ??

  82. 82
    The savant 10.4 highway patrol says:

    presumably half facing in half facing out .

  83. 83
    The savant 10.4 highway patrol says:

    isn’ t resin something you put on the bow of a violin ?

  84. 84
    The savant 10.4 highway patrol says:


    in russia we call them dachas

  85. 85
    The savant 10.4 highway patrol says:

    wot you mean Lord ” Kneel ” Kinnock ??

  86. 86
    The savant 10.4 highway patrol says:

    Yes it does it is now known as the Central African Republic in prior years ruled by a cannibal dictator who had a penchant for putting the limbs of his enemies in the freezer and having them defrosted and grilled when he felt peckish .

    he is now either dead or living in opulent exile in Paris — France of course having been the colonial l power thus such practices being encouraged .

  87. 87
    The savant 10.4 highway patrol says:

    was she solely responsible for the fatberg in the london sewers this week ??

  88. 88
    Magnolia says:

    Labour Pavlov’d Lord Ashcroft at the 2010 GE and Dave smiled down from his ‘we will protect the NHS’ poster and seemed not to lift a finger to either stop or fight it.
    I think that’s why we didn’t win an overall majority.

  89. 89
    Anonymous says:

    Why are you talking cobra`s ?

  90. 90
    Anonymous says:

    No, thats Prescott.Wiliam Hague is the Foreign secretary with the MBA !

  91. 91
    Anonymous says:

    Because neither of them are important ! who cares about 2 “men” prancing about squealing about posh lunches and making pricks of themselves ? The PM doesnt need either of them.Keen on same sex marriage though he is.

  92. 92
    Anonymous says:

    More money than sense.

  93. 93
    Anonymous says:

    Will they show the clip of neil falling in to the sea again ? please

  94. 94
    Anonymous says:

    Can you repeat your post in English please, because the original was gibberish.

  95. 95
    Airey Belvoir says:

    Bill, if you missed Fifi who comes in to change the flowers in the top suites, you missed a real treat. A generous tip opens the door to a world of sensual pleasure.

  96. 96
    Paris Jacobite says:

    I prefer the French Widows in every bedroom.

  97. 97
    Jacob Gorblimey 101 - President of Bongobongo land says:

    I only speak funigalore

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