July 28th, 2013

Read Guido’s Column in The Sun Today


See how the Reds fund Ed in today’s Sun. In Guido’s column:

  • 20130728-111048.jpgIt kicked off for the Tory football team
  • Lucky MP who definitely isn’t “working in the constituency” until September 13th
  • Matt Hancock’s advice goes unheeded by the Chancellor
  • The lobbyist turned Labour Shad Cab member lobbying for old client
  • What to name the new Tory HQ?
  • Guido donates to “Lib Dems Against Sexual Harassment” pressure group
  • UKIP seek Unite backing
  • The NHS trade union “pilgrim” having a laugh at patient’s expense

Politics for the many, not the few. All for just 60p!


  1. 1
    Ah! Monika says:

    Wow, you have a very clean inbox!

  2. 2
    Perry Eclair says:

    I know how to fix that.

  3. 3
    Abbott has a problem with ILLEGAL activity says:

  4. 4
    Owen Jones says:

    Yes and very very waycist too.

  5. 5
    It had to happen. The Blacks want compo. says:

  6. 6
    Vote UKIP says:

    New Tory HQ ? ‘The Conning Tower’ – got to be.

  7. 7

    Is it you or not you? :-P

  8. 8
    Anonymous says:

    UKIP seeking backing from Unite? Lets hope so because that will play straight into a Tory landslide scenario.

  9. 9
    Bazinga! says:

    You don’t!the think taking over most of our cities is enough compensation

  10. 10
    Bob Fleming says:

    Only after they give back all their benefits Diane

  11. 11
    It's compo but not as we know it says:

    Can we sue the Germans then for starting two world wars and all the trauma that entails and still continues to this day.
    No didn’t think so.

  12. 12
    Cornishman says:

    I demand compensation for my family members snatched from their villagers by the rapine Barbary pirates from North Africa long after the civilised Brits had abolished slavery in the Empire.

    My ancestors rowed the galleys for these heathens while they enslaved more of their fellow blacks to sell to the Portrugese.

    Where’s my compo?

  13. 13
    Dirty Politics says:

    What’s going on ‘ere?

  14. 14
    busie says:

    the only landslide there’ll be is when the whole fucking ediface comes crashing in on the tory c’unts

  15. 15
    UKIP supporters - lights on but no ones at home says:

    Vote UKIP and you get the two Eds you are just too stupid, thick and pig headed to see it. When they win there will be no referendum.
    UKIP digging their own and this countries graves so pro Europeans don’t have too.

  16. 16

    The Media as ever are keeping us well informed about statistics not the true figures used by Government ,it’s a good job the Media are on the ball otherwise they are in Danger of reporting something of value to the Public instead of the mundane BS.Red McClusky is still pontificating about being the paymaster for Labour while the Fascist Tory Donors are still robbing us to pay the Tories.I believe Politicians are corrupt therefore according to Smith Logic it is True.Corporations are still hacking away whilst Theresa May has Type 1 Diabetes she’s just 1 0f 2.6 million so why is it worthy of reporting,illness isn’t selective to the Lower Classes.Unlike Egypt we would welcome our ex and present Leaders to be arrested,that would be Justice .We the Public know while we are being fed BS the very Fabric of this Country is being dismantled behind our backs so BS away Media http://brokenbritishpolitics.simplesite.com

  17. 17
    Tories rebuilding yet again what Labour trashes says:

    Wait and see and prepare to be very disappointed.

  18. 18
    Caribbean Indians says:

    We what our land back!

    Oh and some compo too :)

  19. 19
    Who the f*ck made HER shadow secretary for health? says:

    Miss Abbott doesn’t like something because it’s “stupid and offensive”?

    Has the morbidly obese racist cow not looked in a mirror lately?

  20. 20
    A English Man says:

    I would like compo too. Hard to put a price on having Abbott taken from Africa and inflicted on the people of Britain though.

  21. 21
    The clue is Illegal says:

    But how is a campaign to prevent crime, offensive anyway?

  22. 22
    Living in 97.223% white Merseyside says:

    Another Sunday but no Sun. The printed variety that is.

  23. 23
    Yorkshire Slave says:

    Yes Diane, on slavery compensation I’ve wrote a strong letter to the Italian PM on my ancestors being enslaved by the Roman Empire. Hopefully I’ll get a few quid out of them, if not I’ll be taking the entire Italian nation to the European Court of Hoooman Rights.

    That’ll show ‘em!

  24. 24
    You Know It Makes Sense says:

    No,it’ll play straight into a UKIP landslide scenario!
    Read it:

    “Dear Mr McCluskey

    I read with interest the recent poll of Unite’s members by Lord Ashcroft, who found that 12% of your membership would individually choose to join the Labour Party (if contributions to the political fund were no longer attributed automatically).

    In the same survey we noticed that 12% also happens to be the percentage of Unite members who would vote UKIP.

    Given that there is such significant support for UKIP within the union we expect that (in the interests of transparency, equality and the democratic process in general) Unite will be adding UKIP to the list of political parties that your members are invited to donate to via the political fund.

    In the spirit of comradeship we write to confirm our consent for you to add UKIP to the list of mainstream parties to which Unite members can direct their political donations via the political fund.

    We look forward to such parity, and to the deepening friendship between UKIP and the labour movement that it will foster.

    In contrast to the Labour Party, UKIP is already:

    “a party that offers real hope, that stands up for the poor and vulnerable, that puts growth at the heart of its agenda, that confronts privilege… [and will give the electorate] a real and vivid choice as to the future of our country, not one that leaves the electorate indifferent.”

    Unfortunately, unless you knowingly become a full member of UKIP in your own right, we can’t offer you any influence over our choice of candidates but at least you’ll know that UKIP will actually protect the wages and livelihoods of the working class of the United Kingdom, rather than swamping the labour market with immigrants prepared to work for less than the minimum wage.

    Yours sincerely

    Paul Nuttall MEP

    UKIP Deputy Leader”.

  25. 25
    Sometimes I wonder how these people get to the position the hold says:

    The word “illegal”, so and MP thinks laws she helps to make are stupid and offensive, we can be jailed or fined if the people of the country break them, but it’s ok to have people sneak into the country and live here without doing the decent thing and let people know your here, throw them out when they catch these illegals, it’s the people of the country that pay, we have MPs to grab what they can we don’t need anymore people doing it.

  26. 26

    Put Diane
    On the van.
    Put the van on the boat,
    Let us hope it keeps afloat!
    Sail it off to the west
    Kingston, Jamaica is surely best.
    All that time upon the sea
    Surviving on the r & p.

  27. 27
    Living in 97.223% white Merseyside says:

    We’ll never see the likes of The Boom Years (1997-2008), when that nice Mr Blair was in charge, again. At least not in my lifetime.

  28. 28
    the Black Death says:

    listen illegal immigrants, don’t be stupid and offensive be clever and pleasant

  29. 29
    Bob Marley says:

    Fuck off it’s ours now.

  30. 30
    Living in 97.223% white Merseyside says:


  31. 31

    But how many Scousers actually attain its reading age? ;-)

  32. 32
    Professor Proton says:

    You tell ‘em, Guido!

  33. 33
    Sandy says:

    I thought Mau Mau was the latest designer drug the kids we’re shoving up their hooters?

  34. 34

    Mugabe wants a new wife!

    *have been rude to your lot below but think you will survive* :-)

  35. 35
    Edward The Confessor says:

    You’ve got more chance of getting compo from the French after that dickhead William put your ancestors to the sword in his Harrowing of the North.

    Compo from Hollande – it’s your human rights innit!

  36. 36
    Camoron's faux-Tories are subhuman cowardly scum says:

    Ah, not so. You need to think a little more clearly.

    Vote Tory, get Camoron. Camoron holds a referendum in 2017, but only after using every weapon in his arsenal – and spending every penny of our money he lay his grubby thieving socialist hands on – to convince us to vote “YES” to EU membership. Camoron might well win the referendum.

    Even if he loses, he’s already on record for saying there are “no circumstances” under which he’ll take Britain out of the EU.

    Even if we vote to leave, Camoron won’t let us. He’s said so.

    Now, consider Miliband becoming PM. Miliband, a retard who’d be out of his depth in a carpark puddle, will be an unpopular PM from day one. His unpopularity will grow day by day, like a festering tumour. By 2017 there would be no way he’d back-out of a referendum. And, because he couldn’t organize a piss-up in a brewery, he’ll lose the referendum, badly.

    Vote Camoron, get the continuing tyranny of EU membership (29 million Romanian pickpockets are coming to a benefit office near you, soon, thanks to Camoron).

    Or vote UKIP, and freedom. Even if it means Miliband as PM.


    You’re dismissed. You can go back to your portrait of van Rompuy now, and your box of Kleenex.

  37. 37
    Blue Tooth says:

    What about the Vikings? They were all over Yorkshire back in the day.
    Just think, you could take Sweden Norway and Denmark to the ECHR, you’d be quids in!

  38. 38
    Home sweet foreign home says:

    Was at Tranmere Rovers car boot today, the reason why it’s still 97.223% is the fact that most of Eastern Europe and the Philippines are living here, the sun was out but I don’t buy newspapers.

  39. 39
    Mal Vinas says:

    No. The Carib Indians were immigrants from South America.

  40. 40
    trying to reset my rose coloured glasses to Liebour mode. says:

    What boom years, must have been looking the wrong way.

  41. 41
    Thames Dover Wight says:

    Admiral Pellew had a navy in those days. Sadly we don’t have enough ships to run a jolly exercise from Pompy to Devonport. Thanks Dave.

  42. 42
    Mars Attacks! says:

    I want my compo from the Norse! I’ve got “Viking finger” which proves they came over here and forcibly did the nasty with at least one of my ancestors!!
    And if you say no, Diane, is it because I ain’t black, and it don’t count what happens to Babylon, blood?

  43. 43
    Labour's ethical foreign policy says:

    “Boom years”?

    Like the Kabooms! when he dropped his bombs on Iraq’s towns and villages, killing half a million civilians?

  44. 44
    Magic 8 Ball says:

    But Diane Abbott isn’t an illegal immigrant.

    And yet you connect her to the government van?

    Maybe that is why it is ‘stupid and offensive’.

  45. 45
    Ziggy Marley says:

    Yeah we’re the victims here not you, so take your blowpipe and your grass skirt and fuck off!

  46. 46
    Magaluf Engerlander says:

    Oh dear – have the swivvelies had their cage rattled. St Nigel of the Fag Ash been held in contempt? BURN THE TORY WITCHES!!!

    Move on – support is draining away, like UKIP’S EU allowances being used for the UK party.

    Vote UKIP – get Labour – you have been warned.

  47. 47
    Caribbean Indians says:

    The population of the Caribbean is estimated to have been around 750,000 immediately before European contact.

    We were there first, COMPO!

  48. 48
    Silly Moocow says:

    Does he want his share paid into an Isle of Man account? “innocent face”

  49. 49
    Big Ed says:

    All Humans are descended from Homo sapiens – who originated in Africa. Unless you want to go back further than 200,000 years.

  50. 50
  51. 51

    Yeah! Good, innit? :-)

    I didn’t say she was an illegal immigrant either, did I?

    Maybe you are the one with the problem? What are you trying to deny? Freedom of speech? Poetry? Vans?

  52. 52
    Incapable Vince, deputy Chief Cockroach says:

    When I’m Chancellor in the 2015 Lib-Lab coalition, the word ‘illegal’ will be banned. We will double the population by importing millions of illegal immigrants and paying them loads of benefits.

  53. 53
    Russell Brand - Right On Comic says:

    Rape isn’t funny!

    But I still made jokes about it on the Jonathon Ross show.

  54. 54
    Aliens shagged my Granny says:

    when those guys show up they is gonna owe big time

  55. 55
    Little Ed says:

    I do. We all are all descendants of alien bacteria.

  56. 56
    Dr Moreau says:

    Not so!

    Blinky Balls is a Klingon & McCluskey is a Neanderthal.

  57. 57
    Point of Information 2 says:

    It is stupid and offensive, because that is Diane: She is very stupid and offensive.

    The van is a bit off as people are not used to seeing direct state action like this without upfront public consultation. It is also a shock as debate was very much closed down on this issue.

    That was offensive action against the UK people by the previous UK Labour government.

    The stupid aspect of this current policy is that the borders are still offensively wide open. In particular to economic migrants from Europe.

    Diane most certainly does not speak for many in this country, and from her general statements made over time has marked herself out as not being in tune with British sentiment, and is at best a borderline racist herself.

    If she doesn’t like it here, she should go, or just shut up and do something about her ‘Health’ issues.

  58. 58
    Owen Jones says:

    My nights out all follow the same pattern …” Pot noodle and a wank?

  59. 59
    Point of Information 2 says:

    Evidence from Greece suggests otherwise…

  60. 60
    Magic 8 Ball says:

    No, lets be clear here. You stated that ‘the van’, should take Diane back to Kingston, Jamaica.

    Where have I denied you the right to free speech? Free speech does not put any remarks above criticism.

    You can also see in a separate thread, related to compensation for historic events (of which I am NOT in favour), has linked Afro-Caribbeans to claiming benefits.

    I would engage in a bit of pleasant Sunday morning ‘comedy’ banter but I’m sorry that such issues are of much too importance for that.

  61. 61
    Dave says:

    The two Eds.
    Little Ed and Big Ed.

  62. 62
    Anonymous says:

    No links to Gawker? Surely Guido isn’t worried about a little thing like contempt of court.

  63. 63
    Mornington Crescent says:

    …and hand over those responsible for k1lling PC Keith Blakel0ck.

  64. 64
    Wasn't bothered but now think it's a good idea says:

    Vote Conservative get Liebour, vote UKIP and you may change things, we won’t know until UKIP wins a majority, rather take the chance and see how things go.

  65. 65
    Point of Information 2 says:

    If they are seeking Unite sponsorship then this is not necessarily a bad thing.

    It would help dispel once and for all the myth that UKIP is a racist party, and undermine Labour’s funding.

    That they are making the move sounds positive on Europe.

    Could this be because they are not counting on European funding continuing for much longer ? Is the pace of change over there exceeding that of the politics ?

    The G’erman Federal elections will be make / break for the EU in a fundamental way. The UK has to sidestep this.

  66. 66
    Point of Information 2 says:

    How would Cable know ?

    He couldn’t even remember being told about R’enard allegations.

  67. 67
    Biased Broadcasting Corporation says:

    Maybe the government could make public information films warning about illegal residence in the UK and get the BBC to show them? No, thought not. They were already telling us this morning that the van is offensive and somebody we’ve never heard of (left-wing pressure group) MIGHT

  68. 68
    Biased Broadcasting Corporation says:

    (cont’d) be suing the govt. They then proceeded not to give the information that all of the immigration figures are estimates.

  69. 69
    Fishy says:

    Excellent strategy this, courtesy of Mr Crosby, no doubt.

    Tories hire an AdVan with a message that says the bleedin’ obvious ‘If you are an illegal, you’re going to have to go home’…Cue howls of outrage from the left…Cable, the Abbottabad’s, the Guardianista’s etc.

    Tories hoover up all of their, ‘support the illegals’ quotes to save for the election campaign.

    Keep ‘em coming FatBott. Brilliant!

  70. 70

    It’s a fucking poem.

    Sorry about your humour bypass. Go on, try smiling. :-D

    I’m off to lunch.

  71. 71
    Great British Public says:

    Actually, we find Cable stupid and offensive.

  72. 72
    Big Ed says:

    Klingons are from the planet Kronos.
    Neanderthals , like Homo sapiens, also originated in Africa.
    McCluskey is a bastard hybrid.

  73. 73
    Fishy says:

    ‘……….Good Idea’

    Are you really serious? Do you really think UKIP will get a solitary MP, let alone the balance of power.

    Judging that UKIP were established as a party of the left and they have teamed up with extreme pro-Europe Labour in Norfolk, just to oust the Tories, do you actually know what you’re voting for?

    Actually do UKIP know what they’re standing for?

  74. 74
    Well put says:


  75. 75
    Point of Information 2 says:

    He did say put the van on the boat and send that away.

    I read this as wanting the ‘offensive’ van sent away with the ‘offensive’ Diane.

    The van is not an illegal immigrant either, unless it has been smuggled in somehow. Highly likely not from Jamaica as I do not think they manufacture vans there.

    Given most van production jobs in the UK have been transferred to Turkey it is good to draw attention to the van.

    Agree that turning tide against blacks is not a good trend that appears to be developing. Eastern Europeans should be the primary target at present.

    But that would be unacceptable to many in Government at present, for some very fundamental reasons. So they are looking to throw the more easily identified under the van, so to speak.

  76. 76
    Anonymous says:

    Diane is right.

    It is stupid and offensive.

    Leaving should not be voluntary and it should not just be the illegal ones, all the ones the liblabcons let in over the past five decades should be covered (with very limited exceptions).

    That would be the right thing to do.

  77. 77
  78. 78
    Blonde Bombshell says:

    You’re thinking of Cat. But don’t try that with my pussy.

  79. 79
    Anonymous says:

    If slave descendants want compensation they should seek it from the African tribes who sold them in the first place.

  80. 80
    the Black Death says:

    perhaps they want to establish an adult relationship between Capital, Workforce and Government ?

  81. 81
    Anonymous says:

    Vote liblabcon, get liblabcon.

    They’re all in it together.

    Fuck the lot of them.

  82. 82
    Ah! Monika says:

    Where’s Albacore when we need him? ;)

  83. 83
    EU Watch says:

    Looks like Diane is trying to turn a flawed illegal immigrant clean up policy into an exclusively black issue for divisive political purposes.

    Shame on her.

    The campaign so far is not bad.

    For comparison, check out the black sheep campaign that was run in Switzerland a few years back. Again, connected with illegal immigration, but more a PR fail than sign of racism.

    The metaphor was good, but the choice of color poor as it made a very easy target for the left:


    Now, anyone up for a few rounds of Baa Baa Black Sheep ?

  84. 84
    Anonymous says:

    He must mean the boom in immigrants coming to enrich us.

  85. 85
    The Illegal Immigrants Council of Great Britain says:

    So do we!

  86. 86
    Ah! Monika says:

    She forgets SHE WOULDN’T BE HERE if there hadn’t been a slave trade. She’d be starving in Africa.

  87. 87
    Blonde Bombshell says:

    A Conning Tower is on a submarine and the LibDems will not allow the Cons to build them anymore.

  88. 88
    Adam & Eve says:

    Oh no you’re not!

  89. 89
    Anon says:

    Bad news about Denise van Outhouse.

  90. 90
    Buyer Beware says:

    Very very very good point.

    But hard to find fault with anyone for selling Abbott on.

  91. 91
    Theresa May, Home Secretary and Next Leader says:

    It is my solemn duty to continue serving the British people despite enduring a terrible affliction that would incapacitate a lesser person.

    Your sympathy increases my support in my great efforts to save the nation.

  92. 92
    Atkins says:

    Not that a diet would do her any harm mind.

  93. 93
    Real History says:

    Best to go for the Ibo first as they’ve got all that Nigerian Delta oil money. They were housing the slaves that they bought from the Upper Niger raiders & taking vast profits from the European & Arab traders.

    The Upper Niger tribes should be next – these black Mozzies did most of the actual enslavement & as they’re real friendly with the Saudies they can get the cash from them.

  94. 94
    But... says:

    Vote UKIP in the local elections to encourage Cameron to promise more as 2015 approaches. That’s all we can do.

  95. 95
    Sit Petra says:

    Pretty pointless anyway, they would need a billboard a quarter of a mile long to accommodate 20 different languages (they assume these people can read English?).

  96. 96
    I'm all right Jack says:

    You can’t have that in this country.

    And to any brain dead Tory tribalists, the film ‘I’m all right Jack’ slagged off both incompetent management as well as stroppy union officials.

  97. 97
    Ah! Monika says:

    Will some interviewer please ask Vince, “who is going to pay for the pensions of this generation’s immigrants?”.

  98. 98
    Ah! Monika says:

    Take a look at the needleblog for inspiration

  99. 99
    Long John Silver's parrot says:

    What exactly is “stupid” about this campaign and what exactly is “offensive” about it?

    All it is doing is addressing head on illegal acts and trying to stop them continuing in the future.

  100. 100
    Heel Patch says:

    Pretty pointless anyway, they would need a billboard a quarter of a mile in length to accommodate 20 different languages (they assume these people can read English?).

  101. 101
    Ah! Monika says:

    oops see #90

  102. 102
    Barack Obama says:

    Giddy up a oom papa oom papa Mau Mau
    Giddy up a oom papa oom papa Mau Mau
    Hi ho Silver, awaaaaaaaay!

  103. 103

    As always, PoI2, your logical interpretation is excellent.

    I travel at least once a year to Africa, normally to the west and have close ties there. There is therefore no way my remarks are prejudiced against those with black skins. However, there are those who do have black skins and are exceptionally dense, to the point of offence. I am not going to hold back my criticism of them on the off-chance that one may feel I am racially offending. Hence my freedom of speech dig at this miserable soul with a name that could be connected with cocaine and LSD, were I to interpret him in like manner.

    Back to Abbott, she sounds in the tweet (remember where we started, folks?) as if she might be condoning illegal behaviour. Ambiguous. Deliberate? This will not have been the first time for her.

  104. 104
    Heel Patch says:

    Vince advocates a demographic ponzi scheme, get more immigrants to pay for… yes, you get the idea.

  105. 105
    the Black Death says:

    there is doubt that europeans are of african descent.

  106. 106
    Handycock (Teen Fondler) says:

    Come to Portsmouth. I will give the planning permissions to my boys, who will build the apartments for them. So what if the schools cannot fit any more in and A&E is bulging at the seams. My boys and I will get even richer from it. Boaz.

  107. 107
    V1le Labour trashed my Country says:

    Agreed, I’m feeling really enriched and loving the super diverse multicultural cesspit of a Country created by Labour and eagerly await the next 20 million scrounging scumbags.

  108. 108
    A desperate PR stunt by a complete hunt says:

    What’s offensive about it is that it is nothing more than a cheap stunt aimed at wavering party faithful tempted by the rise of UKIP.

    The british government – which ever combination of the letters ‘liblabcon’ it is – has no, none, zero, ziltch intension of ever curtailing immigration. Legal or illegal.

  109. 109
    Party of Dave still letting in 515,000 immigrants per year says:

    So the immigrant figures are not fit for purpose.

    Well who’d of thunk it!

  110. 110
    Twitter twats says:

    Hey righties. Why do you think it’s funny to send ràpe threats on Twitter to a woman just because she campaigned for a woman to be on the £10 note? How inadequate and nasty must you be, not to mention spineless, to hide behind a PC to send disgusting ràpe threat tweets. The worrying thing is some of you have wives and daughters. I wonder what they’d say if they knew their husbands/dads are vile misogynists who like to make ràpe threats.

  111. 111
    The Codfather says:

    = Thick Ed !

  112. 112
    Ah! Monika says:


  113. 113
    Dianne Fatbutt says:

    Bananas should be banned coz they’re wacist !


  114. 114
    Heel Patch says:

    I thought Petra had been put down Guido.

  115. 115

    I had heard you reversed the order for extra flavour.

  116. 116
    Party of Dave still letting in 515,000 immigrants per year says:

    Well said.

  117. 117
    Ah! Monika says:

    I think if you look back to my earlier posts, I had made the Ponzi analogy about a week ago. Subliminal? I hope so

  118. 118
  119. 119
    V1le Labour trashed my Country says:

    There will never be enough compensation for these people with a permanent chip on their shoulder. The world owes them a living and everything else as well, sponging lazy bastards.

  120. 120
    Party of Dave still letting in 515,000 immigrants per year says:

    Call it what it is, a PR stunt.

  121. 121
    Ah! Monika says:

    Righties don’t threaten, they act. I think you had better look to the hard left.

  122. 122
  123. 123
    McAfee says:

    Are you sure you want to go there?

  124. 124
    David oops-did-I-say-that-out-loud ? Cameron says:

    Real immigrant figures are fat on account of Common Purpose.

  125. 125
    Heel Patch says:

    No, I didn’t see that but the logical can spot the illogical, as in financial collapse, another area in which Vince is an expert.

  126. 126
    Owen Jones says:

    I also find them far too bendy to stick up my arse, I’ll be writing to the EU again on this matter. It’s my hooman right as a gay man to stick bananas up my arse!

  127. 127
  128. 128
    Owen Jones says:

    You are naughty but I like you. :)

  129. 129
    Thanks for you votes says:

    There are 2.6 million people who have been diagnosed with diabetes in the UK (2009)

  130. 130
    How to says:

    Un-peel a banana

  131. 131
    Ah! Monika says:

    One for Heel Patch


    His ( Cable’s ) remarks came as a report by MPs rubbished Government migration figures as “little better than a best guess”.

    Is ‘ rubbished ‘ a word?

  132. 132
    Much Ado About Nothing says:

    Am I missing something here? Illegal immigrants, such as those who recently jumped out of a flour lorry, were promptly shown the way to the nearest benefit centre by the police. What on earth is the point of handing themselves in?

  133. 133
    Mine d'Boggles says:

    They had better not be anything but Shona. tribalism rules! Right?

  134. 134
    Charles Downwind says:

    This lot seem to think so : http://www.thefreedictionary.com/rubbished

  135. 135
    Twitter twats says:

    “they act”

    So you mean they commit the ràpes rather than just threaten about it.

  136. 136
    Old Blind Pugh says:

    Of course the original name of the BBC was the London broadcasting company, says it all really control always in Londonistan

  137. 137
    Heel Patch says:

    Rubbish MP’s admit they haven’t got a clue, (Is another way of putting it) :-)

  138. 138
    Don't say you weren't warned says:


  139. 139
    Heel Patch says:

    Anyway to get back on topic, no wonder they have all got big smiles on their faces (thieving bastards).

  140. 140
    pleb = obp = tat says:

    They didn’t sell the good’uns only the criminals and the mentally defective.

  141. 141
    Maqboul says:


  142. 142
    Northerner says:

    So, to stick to the fundamentals initially, you’re saying the Tories are spending government money on public information for narrow, party political objectives? Didn’t they use to complain about Blair’s government doing this, in a much less unsavory manner.

  143. 143
    Nemesis says:

    Jeeez that’s put me off my food for a week at least.

  144. 144
    Concrete Jungle says:

    The race is on to who can cover the country in concrete at the fastest pace.

    If Unite have the 2 million members they claim to have and they all agree on the same issue, they represent almost 7 % of the working population.

  145. 145
    Nemesis says:

    When Abbott fell into a swimming pool she proved that Archimedes was wrong.

  146. 146
    M102 says:

    I would think Vince Cable will be in a home/dead before the Limp Dims get another go on the levers of power.

  147. 147
    Len says:

    Getting 2 million people to agree to anything is mission impossible.

  148. 148
    Dianne Fatbutt says:

    Sooner me than you.

  149. 149
    Mornington Crescent says:

    Are you related to Concrete Pump?

  150. 150
    Sir William Wade says:

    The proposal is that one group of people who have nothing to do with slavery should compensate another group of people who also have nothing to do with slavery.

    Next up:

    Italy to compensate the UK for mass killings, enslavement and dispossession in the first century AD;

    Mongolia apologises to Iraq for sacking Baghdad in 1258.

  151. 151
    Get out of Europe now says:

    All wrong . Why?

    Because UKIP cannot win and Labour will in such circumstances. It does not surprise me that UKIP supporters cannot see that by voting for UKIP they actually place themselves further away from what they want. For you thick twats the two eds have stated no referendum. None not gonna happen.

    Vote UKIP take the vote from the Tories who can win and provide a referendum or get the two eds, a country heading again for bust iand no referendum

    Well done . Dickheads

  152. 152
    Heel Patch says:

    When a body is immersed in a fluid it experiences an up thrust equal to the weight of the fluid displaced…..jumped in and all the water got out!

  153. 153
    Concrete Jungle says:

    I have a relative called Concrete Square You Should Take It Up with him

  154. 154
    Ancient seafarer says:

    Gone hunting for his tuna mates.

  155. 155
    Mornington Crescent says:

    Max Farquar is not a huge fan of Dave’s internet censorship…


  156. 156
    a non says:

    Are you suggesting that any description of the UK now having become a ‘Banana Republic’ through postal voting anomalies, graft and corruption could be deemed a racist insult aimed at an imported electorate?

  157. 157
    Doubting Figures says:

    More like 1.5 million Unite members & 5 % of the working population

  158. 158
    Fishy says:

    Yeah but Brown’s government spent £45billion as an election bribe.

    The Tories just aren’t in the same league

  159. 159
    Mornington Crescent says:

    If only it had the same effect on Diane…

  160. 160
    Fishy says:

    Labour want a statement from the Government on the compilation of the immigration figures. It seems that they’re trying the NHS tactic of denial – seeing if they can get away with, ‘There were no deaths in Stafford’….’Greater than expected mortality is a difficult concept to prove.’

    Wait for them now to tell us there was ‘no excess immigration’

    Presumably the way net migration is counted is the same now as it was in Labour’s time?

  161. 161
    And we are surprised? says:

    Daily Mail

    A briefing note said the release of Abdelbaset al-Megrahi was connected with the air defence deal that Tony Blair discussed with Libyan dictator Colonel Gaddafi.

  162. 162
    gordon is a moron says:

    where is a sinkhole when you need one!

  163. 163
    And we are surprised? says:

    Balls has already stated that there was no excess immigration. Beeboid naturally accepted this while criticising the rise since 2010

  164. 164
    Stiff upper lip says:

    …The japs were a little bit naughty to p.o.w.,s

  165. 165
    Left wing twat spotter says:

    Proof please that it is righties. None ? Well who’d have thunk it.

  166. 166
    He ain't funny, just self-deluded says:

    ‘Russell Brand’ and ‘jokes’ should never appear in the same sentence.

  167. 167
    Ancient seafarer says:

    Oooh you reeker…

  168. 168
    Anonymous says:

    Is ‘secret wall’ covered in children’s names linked to Jimmy Savile and Yewtree paedophiles? Police find ‘hundreds of names’ under plaster in record shop
    Police have found a hidden wall covered in names of ‘victims’
    Names, ages and ‘ratings of sexual performance’ hidden behind plaster
    Record shop room in Greater Manchester raided after tip-off
    Find ‘result of Operation Yewtree investigation’ but police denied Savile link

    Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2380298/Operation-Yewtree-Is-secret-wall-covered-childrens-names-linked-Jimmy-Savile-Yewtree-paedophiles-Police-hundreds-names-plaster-record-shop.html#ixzz2aLrojxAR
    Follow us: @MailOnline on Twitter | DailyMail on Facebook

  169. 169
    Darling buds of May says:

    …For some of us there is nothing to lose by voting UKIP as the other parties have had their chance and blown it big time,so pathetic threats make absolutely no difference,roll on May!!!!D

  170. 170
    Ancient seafarer says:

    Some talking telly head asserted that incoming students who would be only temporary residents and would (most likely, but not always) return home were counted as immigrants – that’s why the figures are so stuffed up.

    You can believe it if you want to…I have travelled the world and in each country I have landed I have had to complete an immigration form, the counterfoil of which has to be handed in as you leave on your way out. If the UK had such a simple system in place it would be fairly easy to count incomers and overstayers.

  171. 171
    Ancient seafarer says:

    That was on here yesterday in full. You must have been out feeding the ducks at the time.

  172. 172
    Northerner says:

    They spent 45 billion on government information?

  173. 173
    Jimmy says:

    If I’d bought a relative of yours I’d be looking for compo.

  174. 174
    Lord Oakshit says:

    LibDems: we are the real nasty party.

  175. 175
    Rev. Spooner says:

    Diane’s always producing shafts of wit.

  176. 176
    Ah! Monika says:

    If that were true the previous intakes of students would leave. Effect on net figure= 0

  177. 177

  178. 178
    achne abbott says:

    Maybe putting chocolate sauce on a Banana Split is a coloured overtone- hence both together can be regarded as a slur and a racial overtone in Diana’s limited vocabulary.

  179. 179
    Hypocrite Watch says:

    I assume you will be giving up your peerage then.

  180. 180
    Jimmy says:

    “unless you knowingly become a full member of UKIP in your own right, we can’t offer you any influence over our choice of candidates ”

    Even the leadership denies all responsibility for that.

  181. 181
    Get The Balance Right says:

    To Improve the ecconomy we have got to Increase our Exports

  182. 182
    pony express says:

    For some of us , internet news travels extremely slowly. You may be lucky with broadband where many in the sticks make do with gastricband.

    Like Abbott we dream of high fibre, but it remains a dream.

  183. 183
    Lord Oakshit says:


  184. 184
    Photoscanner says:

    On observation of your headline photo of the Chamber of Horrors, I noticed that the person in the middle of the front row is Hattie. As I would assume that this is the position that the party leader would take, is there something we are not being told?

  185. 185
    Ena Sharples says:

    OOooooo, it make my blood boil.

  186. 186
    charley and the chocolate facts story for beginners says:

    “Nobody ever goes in, and Nobody ever comes out. ;)

  187. 187
    Mandy the floater says:

    I’ve always felt a great fondness for the boys from Brazil.

  188. 188
    No hope but blood on the streets. says:

    We can no more expect mu5l1ms to adopt Western ideas by hoping to educate them than the 46% of so called educated Americans who still believe in creationism, 200 years after the birth of Darwin. Yes two centuries!!!

  189. 189
    Photographer says:

    I wondered why they were all laughing.

  190. 190
    Yes and No says:

    Offensive? Not really. Stupid? definitely. It’s akin to asking bank robbers to stop robbing banks.

  191. 191
    The tit in no. 10 - but not for long at all now says:

    Remarkably restrained.


    [Note to self : must try harder to alienate the voters.]

  192. 192
    Rub their noses in it says:

    Don’t forget they also wanted to rub the Tories nose in it and also to make the whites angry

    Odious Political party Labour is, odious and evil

  193. 193
    45 Minutes to save the UK and other Bliar shite says:

    I knew that LibDems were divorced from reality BUT does he actually think that Bliar has ANY chance of being elected to ANYTHING in this country ever again ?Bliar is even detested by the majority of the Labour Party let alone the rest of the UK.

  194. 194
    All women shortlists except for hubbies says:

    If she didn’t get the front spot she was going to scream and scream ans scream till we knew where to find her and mrs dromey her hubby came and took her home

  195. 195
    Fucking the ducks says:

    Not everyone spends their life on here.

  196. 196
    Fishy says:

    Oakshitt, a fourth division bag carrier to a third division politician, St Vincent Cable, strikes again.

    I suppose when you belong to such an insignificant rump party of disloyal, dishonest, amnesic nobodies, you’ve got to say something, anything, to get yourself heard

  197. 197
    the Black Death says:

    I don’t think the numbers of generations are big enough to explain the subtle differences that would need to come about to develop say the eye. Not only does the advantageous mutation have to occur but the creature has to survive long enough to procreate and that gene needs to carry on and those descendants need to survive for however many thousands of years that it takes to by chance have the mutation that effects those eyes and etc.
    Rather some people suggest, ie me, that the individual, indeed the society creates the individuals that it sees as advantageous and so the creationists may not be entirely wrong.

  198. 198
    Rational Person says:


  199. 199
    Photoscanner says:

    On further observation, have noticed that Burn’em isn’t on it. Was he absent or has his image been removed, as was common practice in the Soviet Union?

  200. 200

    Here is the first hard evidence of what we all knew to be the case but were unable to state without sounding shrill and insufficiently informed.

    It is difficult to conceive of a more treacherous act than this. It was a conspiracy, it was perpetrated by a large number of people and it was done without any consideration of the unintended consequences which might ensue.

    In former times, the individuals involved would surely have been arrested, tried and, if found guilty, been suspended from a rope for a decent interval.

    Now we just give them titles, pensions and the freedom to earn even more money from their treason. This, in turn, simply encourages more to follow. And they perpetrate their harm oblivious to the suffering endured by the peoples of these lands.

    Be under no illusion, William Joyce aka Lord Haw-Haw, who was hanged at Wandsworth Prison in 1946, arguably caused less damage to our nation than Anthony Charles Lynton Blair and his entire vanguard of unadulterated treachery. I hope, even as this news comes out, that they feel truly uncomfortable about their necks as a foretaste of what they so justly deserve.

    If one single crime was so awful so as to be worth bringing back the noose for, surely this has now been revealed to be it.

  201. 201
    Sane Englishman says:

    It’s not aimed at the immigrants, silly billy. It’s aimed at getting TV time so that the government and pretend to floating voters that it’s doing something to control immigration. When in fact it’s encouraging it for all its worth. Vote UKIP.

  202. 202
    The Loony Left says:

  203. 203
    the Black Death says:

    if we were a shrew running about with dinosaurs 50million years ago, let’s say we live for 10 years, on average from then ’till now that’s 5 million generations. if there is a mutation every 500 years that is advantageous and persistent that is 10 thousand mutations. I can’t see 10 thousand mutations is enough to go from mouse to man.

  204. 204
    Gordon McFuckwit-Bust says:

    That photo should have a sound track along the lines of the ” we are lawyers for you” advert but instead they should say alltogether

    ” we fucked The country for you”

    ( and will do it again if we get the chance in 2015)

  205. 205
    Hypocrite Watch says:

    Son of a CMG, educated at Charterhouse and Oxford.

  206. 206
    James Purnell paid lefty beeboid says:

    Don’t worry we can photo shop him in later no one will notice

  207. 207

    Kuseka or kuchema?

  208. 208
    Dominic Francis student Ruskin College Oxford says:

  209. 209
    Edukayshun under Labour says:

    And Blair was what? Come to think of it where were the present opposite front bench educated?

  210. 210
    Ah! Monika says:

    Opposition Front Bench diagnosed with Type 1 Stupidity.

  211. 211
    Ah! Monika says:

    If you could be bothered, there are multiple explanations how the eye evolved.
    There are creatures alive with light sensitive skin, others with eyes in various stages of development; blind moles, blind fish showing evolution works in both directions.

    Start with The Blind Watchmaker, if you can bring yourself into the 21st Century.

  212. 212
    Ah! Monika says:

    See below. Read and educate yourself.

  213. 213
    wily wonkas says:

    Figures bandied about suggest 500,000 in and 350000 Brits out.
    Where the immigrant intake is a doubtful figure one has to conclude that figures for those emigrating is probably at fault as well.
    Assuming UK indigenous at 50 million now since the 1960s ‘invitations’ started and immigration of just 500000 then you are diluting the native ppoulation by 1% each year irresepective of emigration and the excessive birth figures credited to some new arrivals.
    ONS gives figures for a guest population of 5-6 million now out of a total of 62.5 million total. They cannot be serious unless approximately 7.5 million have already been granted UK residency, which means the UK has already been ‘diluted’ by 15+% .


    How many years before Britons are the minority???

  214. 214
    Labur Spookspersun says:

    Our apologies for not including our real leader, Lenin McMusky.

  215. 215

    Shurely shome mistake here!

    They are not that clever.

  216. 216
    JH3909345934 says:

    Unless in the context of, ‘The joke was on Russell Brand as the firing squad took aim at his centre of mass’.

  217. 217
    Idon'tneednodoctor says:

    Oakeshot, you are a pile of shit.

  218. 218
    Penfold says:

    Never has so much, been given to so few, in expectation of so much.

  219. 219
    Sane Englishman says:

    Try again, to escape the modbot:
    It’s not aimed at the immigrants, silly 8illy. It’s aimed at getting TV time so that the government and pretend to floating voters that it’s doing something to control immigration. When in fact it’s encouraging it for all its worth. Vote UKIP.

  220. 220
    Duck says:


  221. 221
    Ah! Monika says:

    Quote of the Weekend

  222. 222

    You are making a rather elementary mistake of considering the eye as if it were a part of our development all by itself, disconnected from all the other apparatus required to eventually produce an impression in our minds of an appearance. It results from an over-allowance upon the empirical approach, ironically so in view of your semi-defence of creationism. Also the 500 years point, in your later post, is very misleading. See Lederberg.

  223. 223
    JH3909345934 says:

    Chukky doesn’t look quite as pretty as he does in his carefully lit and posed pouty-pics, does he?

    How is he supposed to become President of this country if he doesn’t look gorgeous?

  224. 224
    the Black Death says:

    I am more or less aware of explanations for evolution but I’ll make up my own mind about things thank you very much.

  225. 225
    Living in 97.223% white Merseyside says:

    Census 1951 50m+ whites
    Census 2001 54m+ whites (exc. Irish)

    We should encourage white couples to have larger families but Mr Cameron doesn’t want them to. Also, those with loads of kids run the risk of being vilified on the front page of the DM.

  226. 226
    the Black Death says:

    no I am not confusing eye development with human development presumably some sort of sight was a huge was of huge survival benefit and so was an early development,. the point I am wearily trying to get across is that there has not been enough time since 50 million years for a hit and miss approach to evolve us and I contend there is either a template or development is “pushed” into a desirable direction.

  227. 227
    Fishy says:

    I wondered what had become of Silent Bob

  228. 228
    Chukky O'bama Harrison Ummuna says:

    But I am gorgeous…and intelligent…and not in the slightest bit trashy…unlike my constituents.

    Get over here mirror….Mwah.

  229. 229

    Quite funny methinks

  230. 230
    Paul Sibbel-Deniability, spad to Tony Bliar says:

    It woz biiger boyz – ain’t dun nuffink!

  231. 231
  232. 232

    In summary of my various posts below for those that do not have time to read them all – I know some black people therefore I cannot be a racisit, but I do by my comments cough to being a pseudo-intellectual twat!

  233. 233
    Owen Jones says:

    We need alot more immigration in the UK.

  234. 234
    Mars Attacks! says:

    Yeah you do that, just don’t get too close to the edge of the earth or you’ll fall off. Sadly, we haven’t bred “stupid” out of the human gene pool yet, as your posts show.

  235. 235
    UKIP Guerilla says:

    Vote UKIP, get UKIP.

    Not Labour, not Tory, not Liberal Democrat.

    Jut UKIP.

    It’s as simple as that.

  236. 236
    JH3909345934 says:

    No worries Owen.

    We’ll let them all move in to your street. Make sure you hang a rainbow flag outside your house so they can park the crane they intend to dangle you from nice and close.

  237. 237
  238. 238

    Cough or coff – that is the question

  239. 239

    Nope, I was right and if you don’t get it then you have got no sense of humour

  240. 240
  241. 241
    Anonymous says:

    I suppose we could always offer to ship them back from here (and the Caribbean) to their point of origin!

  242. 242
    Tay King-dePisse says:

    Putting Twenty Stone Tommy next to one of the Eagle twins– that had to have been his idea! Put him next to someone he clearly is handsomer than– albeit not by very much, it has to be said, but still a fact– so he doesn’t look like the homeliest one in class! Having Emily Thornbelly the other side of him also helps, on the “he’s just got large bones” front, as well– I’ll bet SHE thought of that, right? Right. And shite don’t smell, either.

  243. 243
    Richard says:

    Dick Ed

  244. 244
    Adolf Hitler says:

    But what about me and my beloved Fatherland, surely a bit of compo due there.

  245. 245
    Mars Attacks! says:

    It’s not 50 million years. There fixed it for you. Evolution does not happen in isolation. It is neither insular nor linear. It is not always species specific, but can be. It is definitely not intelligent but is almost certainly selfish.

    They eye is proof, if proof is needed that there is no intelligent design, and if their is, the designer is both incompetent and a fecking imbicile. Put the blind spot – where the optic nerve connects to the back of the eyeball, right in the centre? So the brain has to piece together 20 cm scans to create a full picture? Pathetic excuse for design.

    There is no god, there is no soul, there is just now, and we are all, every warring, arguing, eating, fucking, depressed exuberant one of us, lucky to be here, the product of an unbelievable, but obviously possible, series of ancestors.

    End of non sermon.

  246. 246
    Bazinga! says:

    Yes you lefties just invade and kill millions. Do you still keep trying to wash the blood of thousands of dead Iraqis off your hands? Stains doesn’t it.

  247. 247
    Northerner says:

    Are we saying there’s an element of impersonation on this site? I’d always assumed that there was some way of pre enting a person using an already registered username.

  248. 248

    OK. Apologise if I misconstrued your intention. But at the risk of wearying you further, I think to characterise Darwinism simply as hit and miss is to misplace much of its subtlety. There is not space to develop that here.

    There are those who would paint Tom Nagel’s cosmic predisposition as hard-core end-driven teleology. That opens up one range of possibilities. Clearly creationism requires a requirement for the presence of a conscious agent which is a step further than anywhere in this range but is not necessary to explain it in itself.

    I don’t think your point about 50 million years being insufficient cashes out but, again, it needs time to develop appropriately.

    My feeling was implied in my last post. It seems you want to believe in something without having adequate grounds to do so. Respectfully, I put it to you: are you a creationist or not?

  249. 249

    ОK. Аpоlоgіsе іf І mіscоnstruеd yоur іntеntіоn. But аt thе rіsk оf wеаryіng yоu furthеr, І thіnk tо chаrаctеrіsе Dаrwіnіsm sіmply аs hіt аnd mіss іs tо mіsplаcе much оf іts subtlеty. Thеrе іs nоt spаcе tо dеvеlоp thаt hеrе.

    Thеrе аrе thоsе whо wоuld pаіnt Tоm Nаgеl’s cоsmіc prеdіspоsіtіоn аs hаrd-cоrе еnd-drіvеn tеlеоlоgy. Thаt оpеns up оnе rаngе оf pоssіbіlіtіеs. Clеаrly crеаtіоnіsm rеquіrеs а rеquіrеmеnt fоr thе prеsеncе оf а cоnscіоus аgеnt whіch іs а stеp furthеr thаn аnywhеrе іn thіs rаngе but іs nоt nеcеssаry tо еxplаіn іt іn іtsеlf.

    І dоn’t thіnk yоur pоіnt аbоut 50 mіllіоn yеаrs bеіng іnsuffіcіеnt cаshеs оut but, аgаіn, іt nееds tіmе tо dеvеlоp аpprоprіаtеly.

    My fееlіng wаs іmplіеd іn my lаst pоst. Іt sееms yоu wаnt tо bеlіеvе іn sоmеthіng wіthоut hаvіng аdеquаtе grоunds tо dо sо. Rеspеctfully, І put іt tо yоu: аrе yоu а crеаtіоnіst оr nоt?

  250. 250
    Rightwinggit says:

    Hi Guido

    I see a certain malevolent dim witch didn’t make any headway with the Suns editor, then?

  251. 251

    Come on you vagina. Find yourself a moniker and don’t steal mine.

    How about: Twat Face?

  252. 252
    ordure ordure says:

    She does “speak for many”, the claimant incomers so popular around main road streets, open air veg markets and shopping malls where they do no shopping but congregate with like cultures and tongues and who breed as many as possible with ease and who actually care nothing about the UK except the benny cheques.

  253. 253

    @sockpuppet 6:58 pm

    Suffering from severe OCD are we?

    Could you benefit from behavioural therapy or try some medication?

    Whatever, leave my moniker alone and stop playing with yourself.

  254. 254

    ditto @sockpuppet 6:43 pm

  255. 255

    @sockpuppet 6:58 pm

    Lets us try the probes on your frontal cortex again to see if it helps.

  256. 256
    ordure ordure says:

    Please hippabott will you also set up a compo scheme for the relatives of the country who were invaded 0-400AD and 1066-1080AD. I am sure your EU french and itialian mates would concur that this is only fair.

  257. 257

    @sockpuppet 6:56 pm

    Nothing else to play with? Has your willy fallen off?

    You have broken the Yale–Brown Obsessive Compulsive Scale.

  258. 258

    @sockpuppets above 6:41 pm, 6:46 pm, 7:01 pm:

    Dopaminergic hyperfunction disaster?

    Have you tried sucking your thumb?

  259. 259
    ordure ordure says:

    Bored of the pikey.

  260. 260
    Louis Jordan says:

    Is you is or is you ain’t my baby?

  261. 261
    McCluskey's puppet says:

  262. 262
    Diddley says:

    Now, which one are you? I’m starting to get confused!

  263. 263
    Diddley says:

    Fl’abbott should bugger off too!

  264. 264
    Man from the street says:

    Who’s the dickhead who voted for the party that’s still letting 500,000 a year in?

  265. 265
    Idon'tneednodoctor says:

    Evolution only goes in one direction, just the same as time.

  266. 266
    Diddley says:

    FFS is that in someone’s house? I’m glad that was posted, I’d forgotten what a bunch of twats they are!

  267. 267
    Man from the street says:

    Oh and just to add, if Dynamo Dave couldn’t get a majority in 2010 against the worst Labour PM in history what makes you think he will in 2015, is it:

    Gay marriage
    Tearing up the green belt
    Swivel eyed loons
    500,000 immigrants a year
    The campaigning with his heart and soul to stay in the EU.

    Still get your excuses in early, it’s all because of UKIP.

  268. 268
    pot kettle says:

    Isn’t it racist to assume that all illegal immigrants are from ethnic backgrounds?

  269. 269
    kropotkin says:

    You are Guido! A pseudo-intellectual twat, and he cannot be a racist as he often goes to the club nights where Carry Hole performs in minstrel outfit.

  270. 270
    Big Ed says:

    No strings. But plenty of flies.

  271. 271
    kropotkin says:

    A (frequent) quote from Bonkers Johnson?

  272. 272
    kropotkin says:

    Abbott is a morbidly obese racist? Is she that closely related to Guido?

  273. 273
    Hoffa says:

    I know of a concrete boot

  274. 274
  275. 275
    Nick says:

    It’s just a pity guidos boss means he has to ignore the biggest/juiciest menia politics story out there…


  276. 276
    kropotkin says:

    You evidently have not had much experience of IT and HR directors. Darwin would have taken up knitting as an alternative if he had needed to fit them into a theory of evolution.

  277. 277
    Tay King-dePisse says:

    In all honesty, a lot of this round-and-round nonsense about evolution yea/nay is put out by people who “have a dog in the fight.”

    Because there are still details we need to fill in as to how evolution that has taken place did so, and because we cannot in the limited lifespans of under a century do anything more than log genetic differences and theorise how they might play into development of eventual different species, a certain segment of the population, who would love to believe that it all took place six thousand years ago in less than a week, with a Deity who delights in confounding us with plenty of evidence to the contrary, thunders, “A HA! That’s why it’s the ‘Theory’ of evolution, and not the ‘Law’!”, thus misusing the term “theory” to mean “conjecture,” instead of what it DOES mean, “the most parsimonious explanation of all available data.”

    But there are too many scientific types for whom “I really couldn’t tell you” is an embarrassment to admit– though it shouldn’t be, as, after all, that’s what science IS, FFS, trying to figure out what it is you DO know and what it is you don’t, and trying to figure out how to remedy the latter situation. (Look at the climate community, for an egregious example.) And if, as Josh Billings said, “it’s what you know that ain’t so which gets you into trouble,” you’ve always got to admit that new evidence could come along that would render everything you know useless at worst, and serve as a how-not-to at best. But when you vie for grant money, you can’t look as if you have a thumb up your bum by saying “D-u-h, I don’t know, that’s why I wanted the grant, to find out!”

    So you have two sides, each well too wedded to their points of view at the extremes, while in the middle you have religiosos who say “Who really knows how God did creation?” and scientists saying “Maybe there IS a First Mover with a Grand Design, but to just do the raw science involved, ‘nous n’avons pas besoin de cette hypothese’.”

    Me? I just say, we’re here now, let’s enjoy the ride. Pardon my incuriosity on the subject.

  278. 278
    Nogbad the Bad says:

    Whether or not you agree with it from a political point of view, it has been incredible value for money. For the minisule cost of a few days van hire, the message has been spread to the whole country via press and TV, particularly the BBC. There has also been coverage abroad which may have some effect in reducing the number of illegal immigr ants coming here.

  279. 279
    the Black Death says:

    “Rеspеctfully, І put іt tо yоu: аrе yоu а crеаtіоnіst оr nоt?”

    well no, not in the sense that some God made everything at some time in the past.
    If everything was created in a big bang or if there is continual creation there is certainly more than is visible that is made.
    I think it is possible that creation comes with a template and so I felt the need to defend “creationists” because to question cold mechanical Darwinism does not have to be stupid.

  280. 280
    albacore says:

    Dave doing owt to control immigration
    Don’t arf take shedloads of imagination
    It’d land him in E U confrontation
    And, for him, that’s way too much aggravation

  281. 281
    Ironic really says:

    It will be UKIP that causes this country to remain in the E

  282. 282
  283. 283
    Ironic really says:

    Vote UKIP get the Two eds unless you think UKIP can win 300 + seats outright.
    Like they say none so dumb as a UKipper waiting to shoot themselves in the foot

  284. 284
    Anonymous says:

    Well it appears that

    A Scotland Yard spokesman said: “A 21-year-old man has today been arrested in the Manchester area on suspicion of harassment offences.

    Obviously a rightie from the that hotbed of conservatism the backstreets of Manchester

  285. 285
    Hаrry Cоlе says:

    If you want to say Hаrry Cоlе, why don’t you say Hаrry Cоlе?

  286. 286
    Keyserling says:

    The Tories were inexpertly trying to follow Farage’s lead, as they believe they must, to pilfer some of his Kippers for the 2015 election.

    I loved Farage’s “not me, guv” attitude to the van, although he couldn’t say it without laughing, as was I. He is getting good at politicking.

    Whoever walks in that direction, accompanied by a van or not, is going to be accused of racism. UKIP is packed to the gunnels with racists, homophobes, and xenophobes, even though Farage hypocritically has his snout so deep in the EU expenses trough, you can’t see the soles of his feet.

    Out there in the wilderness, to the right of the Tories, is only a wilderness. It’s where UKIP, the BNP and EDL live, all racists, cranks and easily-led fools. If the Tories go there, it will haunt them for a generation.

  287. 287
    Heel Patch says:

    I think it’s disgusting that a Conservative MP purporting to be anti-porn has been secretly using her website to promote links to sleazy wankfests.

  288. 288
    Magic 8 Ball says:

    “Yes, but I’m not going to pay for other couples to have children”

    And so on and so on….

  289. 289

    Rich and Mark are just hours away.

    Enjoy whilst you may.

  290. 290
    Keyserling says:

    The Tories were inexpertly trying to follow Farage’s lead, as they believe they must, to pilfer some of his Kippers for the 2015 election.

    I loved Farage’s “not me, guv” attitude to the van, although he couldn’t say it without laughing, as was I. He is getting good at politicking.

    Whoever walks in that direction, accompanied by a van or not, is going to be accused of racism. UKIP is packed to the gunnels with racists, homophobes, and xenophobes, even though Farage hypocritically has his snout so deep in the EU expenses trough, you can’t see the soles of his feet.

    Out there in the wilderness, to the right of the Tories, is only a wilderness. It’s where UKIP, the B’n’P and E’D’L live, all racists, cranks and easily-led fools. If the Tories go there, it will haunt them for a generation.

  291. 291
    Keyserling says:

    Why mod me for typing ßŋƥ?

  292. 292
    Jockolass says:

    Aye it’s pure dog whistle politics, which ignores the fact that whatever illegal immigrants are here, are here because the UK Border Agency couldn’t run a bath, & that’s official. I suspect THE HAND OF CROSBY HERE.

    I hae ma doots the pilot will be extended, mainly because Nigel Farage outplayed the Tories by objecting to them, a clever tactic I had no idea he was capable of. This has prompted Cable to interject & I think the idea will be binned.

    But it shows you just how low the Tories are prepared to stoop

  293. 293
    Magic 8 Ball says:

    So even though the Labour government (in your mind) “totally and utterly fucked the country up” after the worst financial crisis in living memory, two unpopular wars in Asia and with almost two years of a politically inept dalliance at PM by Gordon Brown there was a hung-parliament and conceivably Labour could have formed a coalition government with the Lib Dems?

    You obviously belong to the David Cameron ‘if you say it often enough it becomes true’ school.

  294. 294
    anonymous and luving it says:

    hello mr ticklebottom :)

  295. 295
  296. 296
    Magic 8 Ball says:

    To me, and call me over-sensitive if you like, a major element of the controversy regarding “The Van”* is the rather unmistakable conclusion that it LIES, not only to the British people but also to the very people it is aimed at. That is to say, the afore-mentioned “*” leads to a statement which says the “106 arrests” is a completely made-up figure.

    * “The Van” is a rather excellent book by Roddy Doyle and possibly an even better film featuring Colm Meaney, a stalwart as Chief O’Brien in “Star Trek – The Next Generation” (This bit isn’t a lie)

  297. 297
    Anonymous says:

    The van is intended to convince people that the government is getting tough on immigration because it has to enter the same arena as UKIP and because there will never be an end to those who have to be blamed for the economic meltdown and financial shitstorm, as long as it is never the bankers or international tax-fiddlers or the political classes.

    So, from the poor, the sick, the disabled and unemployed, the propaganda will move to the elderly of generation X to the squeezed middle to anyone who looks a bit foreign or dodgy or who is not keeping their head down quite far enough.

    It is basically splashing a Sun or Mail headline on a van and inciting drivers and pedestrians to a two-minute hate, much as Iain Duncan Smith uses lies to incite people to tip disabled people out of wheelchairs.

    It is the politics of fear and hate and division and lies.

    Very comfortable turf for the Tories.

    A bit like George Osborne and David Cameron saying that all social security recipients were just moments and inches away from killing their families because Mick Philpott had done so and he was claiming benefits.

    As the election approaches, though, this will probably seem quite restrained and inoffensive.

    How low can Tory filth and scum sink?

    Just wait and see.

  298. 298
    Epizeuxis Watch says:

    My guess is that it will be a photograph of the famous van (easier than drawing it) with something meant to the Farage with the speech balloon ‘Thanks, Dave, for saying what I couldn’t say.’

    Any other predictions? Winner gets absolutely nothing, except possibly a mass groan of recognition.

  299. 299
    Pleb says:

    If the problem is as big as the media says it is, they’re going to need more vans.
    Another growth strategy from Osborne?

  300. 300

    @the Black Death

    OK. I think I judged you correctly.

    To put it flippantly, you believe in teleology without the need for a sky fairy. Perfectly reasonable position and I cannot disprove it though I am not that far inclined as you are, even with that clarification.


    Any human being who professes infallibility has got a problem. It might even be worse for deities though, God knows, we know enough who harbour the delusions who are, to all reasonable appearances, mere mortals, almost like us. Almost.

  301. 301
    Heel Patch says:

    Hogarth was on the button, Wonga 18th century style (three balls).

  302. 302
    Masked pedant says:

    So it’s not racism, it’s simply a response to lawbreaking?

    Can we now expect to see similar vans touring the City of London in response to insider trading, tax evasion and fraudulent bankruptcy?

    Why not?

  303. 303
    Tachybaptus says:

    So, does anyone think illegal immigrants, on seeing this will think, oh I hadn’t realised I was breaking the law, I will go home and pack.

    As the answer must be none, what then, is the real purpose?

  304. 304
    Tachybaptus says:

    Too subtle? I guess Miliband saying ‘Unite behind me.’

  305. 305
    Universal Hiss says:

    I don’t think we need to worry about any main stream parties any more. They all love the EU.

    The Roma will see that comes to an abrupt end in January. I’m hoping for at least 2 million all arriving in London & the S.E.

  306. 306

    Van, van, van, van, van, van, van, van, van, van, van -CO- Epizeuxis Watch. :-)

  307. 307
    Magic 8 Ball says:

    I suppose the dilemma is, if the BBC (very trepidatious and even-handedly) point out the government is lying will the usual suspects on here accuse them of bias?


  308. 308
    trying to reset my rose coloured glasses to Liebour mode. says:

    Call honest and decent people all the names you want, a lot people I know WILL be voting UKIP, the LibLabCon are finished and people like you trolling are making it easier for a lot more people to vote UKIP, Liebour have lost, get over it.

  309. 309
    Tachybaptus says:

    Except that our rulers are now against beer as well as gin. I’d like to see what Hogarth would have made of ‘Low-fat Milk Avenue.’

  310. 310
    Good point says:

    When some angry pissheads get infuriated by the sight of the van and look for some brown people to beat up, how can they tell if they are here illegally?

  311. 311
    Universal Hiss says:

    Even Saint Vince said it was not effective as most illegals won’t read English very well.

    That made me laugh. Just the sort of immigration this country needs then.

  312. 312
    Magic 8 Ball says:

    Can I ask a genuine question?

    Who on here GENUINELY believes that Len McCluskey is pulling Ed Milliband’s strings?

  313. 313
    Heel Patch says:

    The purpose is two fold.
    1.) It makes them look like a load of Jackasses
    2.) Throw some more money away on a pointless exercise
    Makes perfect sense.

  314. 314
    trying to reset my rose coloured glasses to Liebour mode. says:

    Immigration is in the news, us plebs are talking about it, what with jobs ,housing,NHS getting more and more difficult for the taxpayers to use or get, the crap that’s running the country think they need to jump on the bandwagon and pretend they are doing something

  315. 315
    Nigel's garage says:

    If the National Front was shouting slogans like illegal immigrants to “go home” in the 1970s, and now it is the government repeating the same slogan in 2013 on the billboards; the what does it say about the current government?

  316. 316
    Jimmy says:

    Symptoms of Type 1 Diabetes, perhaps?

  317. 317
    Twatwatch says:

    Fvck off back to your Unite paymasters would you sonny. Sending thieving scum back to where they came from is the right and decent thing to do.

  318. 318
    Universal Hiss says:

    It was only two vans in a few areas so probably only 10 people noticed, 7 of those being Guardian hacks. Everyone else was too busy reading Wonga ads or Ramadan supplies or whatever passes for ads in London these days.

  319. 319
    Tachybaptus says:

    That was the fake Tachybaptus. If the pathetic twerp is going to steal my moniker, he might at least at least use it to say something intelligent.

  320. 320
    Badnog the Bad says:

    Whether or not you agree with it from a political point of view, it has been incredible value for money. For the minisule cost of a few days van hire, the message has been spread to the whole country via press and TV, particularly the BBC. There has also been coverage abroad which may have some effect in GAINING THE CONSERVATIVE PARTY VOTES AT THE NEXT GENERAL ELECTION.

  321. 321
    Heel Patch says:

    The lithograph would be exactly the same, apart from the title. :-)

  322. 322

    Recommend Sir John Soane’s Museum in Lincoln’s Inn Fields and Pitzhanger Manor in Ealing which was next to my old grammar school. In those days, it was the public library, where I did a lot of my homework research, but is now open as Soane’s residence.

    The description the best house-museum in the world is no hyperbole, it is fantastic.

    The picture room is incredible but ensure that each panel is opened for you:


    The canvasses for Hogarth’s Harlot’s and Rake’s Progresses and Humours of an Election can be seen here plus so much other stuff crammed into the space of three town houses that my dozen or so visits there revealed something new each time.

  323. 323
  324. 324
    Nigel's garage says:

    Oh, OK.

  325. 325
    Tachybaptus says:

    Bang to rights…

  326. 326
    Mola Ram says:

    Baree jarogi. Mukti degi kali ma. Kali ma… kali ma… kali ma shakti de.

  327. 327
    average joanna says:

    It says that successive governments have failed to tackle the problem for over 40 years.
    Resulting in overcrowding,pressure on schools,hospitals and the welfare system, plus fewer jobs for the indigenous population.
    Other countries have strict immigration laws. Family members who wanted to move to Oz and Greece had prove they had the desired skills or finances to support themselves.
    We have got to start applying the same requirements.

  328. 328
    UKIP Guerilla says:

    No amount of Tory whitewashing/brainwashing will hide the plain truth.

    If enough people vote UKIP, they get UKIP. Do the math.

    Please don’t attempt to subvert the painfully obvious any further.

  329. 329

    No. Not at all. McCluskey is totally unaffected by power. He will not try to use donations to buy influence for Unite. He is a totally pukka man. What you see is what you get.

    How am I doing so far…?

  330. 330
    Universal Hiss says:

    Impossible while we are still tied to the EU Titanic.

    Well I suppose we could put up closed signs at the boarders. Need politicians with some balls for that.We don’t have any.

  331. 331
    UKIP Gorilla says:

    Why not?

    They sure as fuck won a shitload of Council seats, without really trying!

  332. 332

    You’ve either got or you haven’t got style:

  333. 333
    Universal Hiss says:

    Go to London? Are you insane?

    (Would love to see that)

  334. 334
  335. 335
    Mars Attacks says:

    I don’t – I just think he’s got his hand up RetardEd’s 4rse, working “the hollow man’s” mouth

  336. 336
    Bing Crosby says:

    A singer like Frank Sinatra comes along once in a lifetime – Why did it have to be mine?

  337. 337
    How to win the next three elections in a row says:

    Step 1.
    The removal of all illegals, shutting the door to all none EU country citizens, the blocking of Romanian & Bulgaria citizens emigrating to the UK, the deportation of all criminal immigrants permanently.

    Step 2.
    Then hold a referendum on our EU membership in the summer of 2015.
    The foreign aid budget of £11 billion to be use to accomplish all of the above.

  338. 338

    Are you insane?

    I do hope so! :-)

  339. 339
    Tachybaptus says:

    Happy is the man who lives his whole life without ever having been described as stylish.

  340. 340
  341. 341
    Tachybaptus says:

    Just bought some food at my local supermarket and had to go through the self checkout. The touch screen had a button marked ‘Nuts and Bananas’. I pressed it happily enough.

  342. 342
    Contrarian says:

    Unfortunately for you, you possess it in abundance.

    We benefit.

  343. 343
    albacore says:

    Time was, an Englishman’s home was his castle
    But that idea entailed too much hassle
    So lie back and think of England for a while
    And savour the enrichment, LibLabCon-style

  344. 344
    Angus says:

    Hello Jimmy. Just a small prick…

  345. 345
    Gooey Blob says:

    The picture tells you all you need to know about the party that would like to form the next government (but won’t, in all probability.)

    He who pays the piper calls the tune.

  346. 346
    Anonymous says:

    So, on Sky News papers review a moment ago:
    Tessa Jowells answer to the NHS crisis is to restrict the admission of elderly people into hospital.

    Where will they build the gas chambers?

  347. 347
    Gooey Blob says:

    Arfle barfle gloop?

  348. 348
    Bazinga! says:

    You missed a few ones.

    Get rid of Scotland and Wales and equalise constituencies to stop favouring Labour.

    Ban postal voting

    Get rid of the BBC.

  349. 349
    Bazinga! says:

    In Tory areas. Andy Burnham will be in charge.

  350. 350
    Bazinga! says:

    Has Tessa Jowell been signing any more documents without reading them I wonder?

  351. 351

    £35m of gems stolen by gunmen from the Carlton Hotel in Cannes today.

    Definitely not going there for lunch any more when I visit my mother.

  352. 352
    Gooey Blob says:

    Only a Labour troll uses a term like LibLabCon. It’s their way of mitigating their rotten 13 years in power by trying to make other parties seem equally as bad. In reality, no matter how bad the others are, no other party is even half as bad as Labour.

    You also seem to have forgotten to append the Labour trolls’ slogan of “vote UKIP”. Sorry to have to break the news to you, but Ed won’t pay you a penny for that post. Try again in a little while, eh? Don’t forget to mention UKIP next time.

  353. 353
    Helpful suggestion says:

    Elderly British people should be first in the queue for treatment.
    They’re the ones who’ve paid into the system for 50 odd years.

    Stop access to those who weren’t born here or don’t contribute.

  354. 354
    Gooey Blob says:

    35 million stolen… with that sort of money Labour might be able to tell the unions to take a hike for a while. Just a thought, but is the description of the offender an orange-skinned man with a South African accent by any chance…?

  355. 355
    Calamity Clegg, Chief Cockroach says:


  356. 356
    Diane Fatbott says:


  357. 357
    Jane Pig Grim says:

  358. 358
    Must try harder says:

    There is absolutely nothing racist about telling illegal immigrants to leave.
    They’re here illegally.
    They’re breaking the law.
    Trying to close down legitimate debate about an important issue that bothers millions of Brits with false accusations of racism is unforgivable.

  359. 359
    Tsunami says:

    When Abbott fell into a swimming pool she gave me life…..mummy!

  360. 360
    Elderly Person says:

    So what irritating Jowell syndrome is saying is: approx.18-65 yrs old. Pay income tax, NI, VAT, car tax, petrol tax, green taxes, BBC tax, all sorts of other fvcking taxes . 65+ (while still paying most of these taxes) Become a liability.

  361. 361
    albacore says:

    Gas chambers? Ooh! – the environmental cost
    Can’t have all those natural resources lost
    Wire them up to solar panels or windmills
    That’ll cure the old whingers of all their ills

  362. 362
    Tay King-dePisse says:

    ” ‘Are you insane?’

    I do hope so! :-)”

    You may be right– you may be crazy. But you just may be the lunatic you’re looking for.

    Hope for you yet, Cat, to be converted to Mahatma Joelism.

    But you don’t need us to worry for you, ‘coz you’re all right.
    You don’t care what we say any more, ‘coz it’s your life.

    We’ll just go ahead with our own lives and leave you alone.

  363. 363
    Tachybaptus says:

    I’m wired up to a panel and the sun won’t shine,
    I’m wired up to a windmill and the wind won’t blow.
    Please, Tessa Jowell, won’t you start up the diesel
    And bring a speedy end to all my woe?

  364. 364
    albacore says:

    Half as bad, or less, they’re rotten to the core
    Worse than any Parliament there’s been before
    All three parties’ betrayal of the nation
    Renders the whole gang beyond approbation

  365. 365
    What Dave is going to Block says:

    Guido has blocked it too. :evil:

  366. 366
    Claire Perry A@+# licker says:

  367. 367
    Mark Oateη says:

    No flies on her.

  368. 368
    I wonder why Claire says:

  369. 369
    Cherie Morticia Bliar says:

    Feck off Guido. We the werkers have to stick together – I wouldn’t take corporate money like them conservatives, plenty of charities have paid me to speak especially after I’ve served them with unexpected invoices.

  370. 370


    Whoa! I Didn’t Start the Fire. Neither did I ever suffer from depression, nor contemplate suicide (too damn busy for that), drink polish meant for furniture or abuse substances apart from some funny smokes.

    On the other hand my life experiences are pretty well contemporaneous with Joel’s, save that he was conscious of Americana whereas my song would have had more English references. I also did become a history nut.

    On elevation to sainthood, my father had met Gandhi and considered him to be off his rocker, especially with respect to his brahmachari celibacy experiments with his niece, Manubehn.

    So I will be happy to remain myself. If others like it, that is fine. If they don’t, then that also is fine.

  371. 371
    Paint catalogue says:

    Why has nobody noticed how hideously white that lot are? Chucks must be feeling very out of place

  372. 372
    UKIP or bust says:

    Their looking for the porn, luv.

  373. 373
    JH3909345934 says:

    I’d fire him if I were you love. I wonder if his other 49 sites are as easy to hack? Don’t tell Guido, he might ‘sponsor’ another hacker.

    The third site out of a set of 50 run by one person. Not much of an endorsement.

  374. 374
    JH3909345934 says:

    PS – it is claireperry.org.uk, not claire.perry.org.uk

    You stupid, ignorant cow. What is Tucker’s law again?

  375. 375
    CHRIST ON A BIKE! says:

    Spot on Bob!

  376. 376
    kropotkin says:

    I have found that being less than fawning about the Blessed ‘Arry incurs the wrath of modbot.

  377. 377
    Smiffy says:

    That is bugger all funding.

    That kind of money may mean something to someone in the North, but in the south, it is the cost of a good lunch

  378. 378
    Hugh Janus says:

    What a collection of very little but hugely incompetent people. They are all quite nauseating in their own way.

    By the way, where’s that pretentious little shit Burnham?

Media Reader

Newspapers No Longer Willing to Toe Party Line | Roy Greenslade
London Live to Cut 20 Staff to Buy in More Content | Press Gazette
Telegraph Revealed Auschwitz 3 Years Before Liberation | Telegraph
Mirror Hacking: 50 Legal Action Claims | Press Gazette
45 Mirror Group Stories Linked to Phone-Hacking | Press Gazette
We Must Not Call Charlie Hebdo Killers ‘terrorists’ | Telegraph
Page 3 and the Art of the Self-Pity Statement | Guardian
Here is What a 7 Way Debate Sounds Like | BBC
Poll: Sun Readers Want Page 3 to Stay | Business Insider
The Sun: An Apology | Press Gazette
More Women Prosecuted For Telly Tax | Mail

Rising Stars
Find out more about PLMR AD-MS

Boris on British Jihadis. Apparently based on MI5 intel:

“If you look at all the psychological profiling about bombers, they typically will look at porn. They are literally w***ers. Severe onanists. They are tortured. They will be very badly adjusted in their relations with women, and that is a symptom of their feeling of being failures and that the world is against them. They are not making it with girls, and so they turn to other forms of spiritual comfort — which of course is no comfort.”

Tip off Guido
Web Guido's Archives

Subscribe me to:


AddThis Feed Button

Guido Reads

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 1,717 other followers