June 22nd, 2013

Prime Minister Miliband: Tough on Sardines

Ed Miliband is giving a speech today explaining how Labour can be tough on spending. He praised by way of example Atlee’s 1945 Labour government’s attitude to spending, “This is a government that banned the import of sardines because they were worried about the balance of payments. It shows a government can be remembered in difficult times for doing great things.”



  1. 1
    Jimmy Goldsmith's smile says:

    That’s rich from someone who on his watch helped turn us into a nation of f- – – -n’ sardines!!

  2. 2
    Anonymous says:

    …and tough on the causes of sardines.

  3. 3
    Dave"The One Term Prime Minister" Cameron says:

    Half a million people rely on food banks. Hungry for change? Our next action: transform crisis causing banks into food banks!

  4. 4
    Spud says:

    Tough on sardines, tough on the causes of sardines

  5. 5
    GCHQ surveillance says:

    I love this as well lesson giiving from the one and only

    Recent Rupert Murdoch twitter

    “Pope Francis preaches and clearly practices humility. Doing God’s work by example. Now needs to reorganize Curia.”

    Did you mean you are going to reorganize your curia Digger?

    How on earth do you think you are in any position to tell other people what to do when your have been running a criminal empire here in the UK for years?

  6. 6
    les says:

    Eric Cantona ‘When seagulls follow the trawler, it is because they think sardines will be thrown into the sea.’ Sardine hero > Ed!

  7. 7
    Nothing Better To Do says:

    Next time someone wants to know why we are in this god awful mess just refer him to the calibre of leaders and this article as evidence.

  8. 8
    Ed's Financial Advisor says:

    After Labour we were lucky to afford to eat tinned sardines

  9. 9
    Mesa Pete says:

    Sardines, sardines, sardines.

    One nation of sardines. Multi-cultural sardines. Devolved sardines. University fee paying sardines. Sardines under surveillance.

  10. 10
    Ed's Financial Advisor says:

    “The Nation is bankrupt …………Let them eat bouillabaisse …..

  11. 11
    Ed's Financial Advisor says:

    Ich bin ein sardine

  12. 12
    Cornish Pilchard says:

    Bloody Europeans comin’ over here and taking our jobs

  13. 13
    Cornish Pilchard says:

    Seriously though folks ……… what an intellectually bankrupt, morally useless, economically illeterate, uttery incompetent, vacuous arsehole

  14. 14
    nellnewman says:

    Oh sorry that has made me cry with laughter!!

    My God he is So Funny!

    Well that should win him the votes of the Sardine Protection League then!

  15. 15
    Maqboul says:

    He changed his allegiance from Labour to the Conservatives. Labour lost the election, but not necessarily because of Murdoch. Either way, get over it you Big Girl’s Blouse.

  16. 16
    EU Watch says:

    Kick this into the Common Fisheries Policy long grass and get the referendum to exit EU.

    He probably couldn’t ban sardines as UK is likely committed to purchasing its quota in the name of EU trade harmony.

    Bit discordant given that the EU trade zone is fucked.

  17. 17
    being anti sardine is racist says:

    what about sardines that are forced to flee from their home-seas because of militant dolphins that are killing them all.

  18. 18
    Count Dooku says:

    Bastard. I was just going to post that!!!

  19. 19
    One Hit Wonder says:

    Instead of becoming the Man Of Steel, Ed decided to impress voters by becoming the Man Of Sardine.

  20. 20
    neilfutureboy says:

    The 1945 Labour government doesn’t get 2% of the kicking it deserves.

    It was stupidity such as this which ensured our economy, which after WW2 had an enormous head start on our competitors, failed to achieve growth. Within a few years Germany, at the behest of the American occupiers, ended all these destructive restrictions, allowing the free market to operate and unsurprisingly achieving the German economic “miracle”. Thus in a few years Germany was richer than us – they had only suffered bombing and occupation whereas we suffered Labour.

    Then the German political class started running things again and growth slowed.

    The fact that the BBC state broadcaster, nor even the Cameronian Tories would ever dream of saying this about these Labour failures says a lot about why we are still bedevilled by such parasites.

  21. 21
    Point of Information says:

    This is the bottom end of the Miliband gene pool we’re talking about.

    After Ralph gave his all to David, there was not much left for Ed.

  22. 22
    Maqboul says:

    Me ‘eart bleeds. Although I hope the bloody tax payer isn’t subsidising these food banks.

  23. 23
    Taliban Labour Policy Idea says:

    Ban the Dolphins from wearing Burkas !

  24. 24
    BBC reporter says:

    The current Lord Atlee, a Government Whip in the House of Lords, has just been heard to say

    “Mr Miliband really should not talk about my grandfather about whom he clearly knows nothing”

  25. 25
    Nick Clegg says:

    It’s OK to eat sardines now and again as long as it’s fleeting.

  26. 26
    The BBC Causes serious mental illness says:

    Socialism is a nasty form of mental illness. Labour are one of the causes, and their twisted ideology a symptom.

    A rational person could write that Labour is the perfect politic of destruction – national and personal. However, it is the politic of the lazy as well, which is why it has appeal.

    The BBC has a vested interest in perpetuating this condition as their income is dependent on it, and people’s laziness in just going with the telly tax flow.

  27. 27
    nellnewman says:

    “And our starting point for 2015/16 is that we won’t be able to reverse the cuts in day to day, current spending unless it is fully funded from savings elsewhere or extra revenue, not from more borrowing.”

    militwit is not promising spending cuts – he is saying that he will have to identify where he can get money from to fund spending – they’ll be raising taxes as they always do and they’ll keep on spending as they always have. labour is NOT a safe pair of hands for our economy.

  28. 28
    Nick Clegg also desperately says:

    … and what happened to that 2012 London Olympic feel good spirit ?

  29. 29
    Hoots! It's Clown says:

    Only two things smell of fish. And I steer well clear of both of them!

    Ya bas.

  30. 30
    nellnewman says:

    I have not yet worked out why people need food banks when they are accessing benefits.

    Or is it that the benefits are going on alcohol, cigarettes and tv poker so they no money left for food?

  31. 31
    Tony Benn, 101 years old says:

    As you all know, I write young Ed’s speeches for him. I promised Adolph I would

    And all I can frankly remember nowadays is Atlee and his famous sardines

    But we won World War I without sardines as welll…

    Hilary, please give me my pills like a nice chap

  32. 32
    Anonymous says:

    Labour packed us in the UK like sardines

  33. 33
    Scraatchi and Such says:

    I could strangle a sardine!

  34. 34
    Grumpy Old Man says:

    Unfortunately for Ed, there are still a few of us around who remember the good old days of Attlee’s government. I used to walk with my Mum to the chemists where we got our weekly ration of orange juice – one 12 fluid ounce bottle for each child. Meat was on ration as well until Churchill took the reins once more. Some one should tell Ed that the Balance of Payments means fuck-all in the global economy – it certainly meant fuck-all to Gordon.

  35. 35
    Denis Healey, 102 years old says:

    Do you remember the White Hot Heat of the Technological Revolution Tony?

    It propulsed us into the arms of the IMF faster than the speed of light

    Do you nthink Eddy has the talent to do the same thing?

  36. 36
    nellnewman says:

    Talking of sardines brings back happy memories. Lunch in a cafe overlooking the Spanish Med – sunny day and a plate of grilled sardinas and crusty bread. Oh and a glass of red wine of course!

  37. 37
    i don't n eed no doctor says:

    Miliband really is stupid. He has now changed his view on the cuts made by the coalition, having previously overseen his party voting against every cut. Now he expects us to believe his new policies, which are copied from the coalition. How on earth can Miliband be believed on anything he does or says. Who is to say he won’t changed his mind if, god forbid, he was elected into power.
    Miliband will do and say anything to try and win votes, but he has no ideas, and absolutely nothing to offer.

  38. 38
    Schrödinger's Dog (the sardine-eating mongrel) says:

    Seriously, though, has anyone noticed that since the EU revved up to full power, you just can’t get proper sardines anymore. Not the classic Norwegian Brisling, which used to come from places like Stavanger in Norway. Just these ubiquitous horrible fat Portuguese abominations.
    Norwegian companies like King Oscar cannot get any traction in the British Isles and most of Europe anymore, and we are forced to eat the Portuguese shit.
    And don’t tell me there isn’t a canned fish cartel operating, with John West (under its Far Eastern ownership) predominating.
    Nigel, will you bring back Norwegian sardines? Please!

  39. 39
    A Pilchard says:


  40. 40
    Squeaker Berca says:

    Burkas will be allowed in the House of Commons

    For men and women

    No discrimination please

  41. 41
    Mr Rotovator says:

    His economic policies have always been fishy

  42. 42
    i don't n eed no doctor says:

    Sounds just like Mablethorpe.

  43. 43
    Trader Farage says:

    And kippers for Ukippers?

  44. 44
    i don't n eed no doctor says:

    Something fishy going on for sure.

  45. 45
    oh my cod says:

    Like a fish out of water.
    As the French say Ed, “Fin”.

  46. 46
    parlimentary self interest says:

    Does not Milliband need to declare a matter of self interest.
    He does not like them!

  47. 47
    nellnewman says:

    militwit has not changed his mind about cuts, all he’s saying in that speech is that when he decides to keep on spending ,as he will if he gets the keys to no 10, he is going to tell us first where he’s going to get the money from to do it.

    And since that money is likely to come from us by way of raised taxes that’s very magnanimous of him !1

  48. 48
    Just asking says:

    And where is Adolph in the story?

    Did he get censored?

  49. 49
    Mr Rotovator says:

    Can I exchange my Euros for Aeros there?

  50. 50
    'Lucky I can't see far with this leg.' says:

    Noises Off!!!

    Nearly ejected from the theatre because I was laughing so much, thank you Mr Frayne.

  51. 51
    Ed, oh Ed! says:

    This is the best result of a Milliband sp erm fight?

  52. 52
    Polly says:

    Red herrings for Labourites

  53. 53
    being anti sardine is racist says:

    i look forward to seeing all members of the Conservative Party wearing burkas shouting maggie akbar and launching jihad against dophins

  54. 54
    Great Granddad says:

    Eric Cantona would have liked that.

  55. 55
    Tony (grin) says:

    Wendi and I have been doing things fishy.

  56. 56
    Big Nige says:

    All the main parties pretend to be different but as all the main policies are dictated, directly or indirectly, from Brussels it’s a sham. Literally political theatre.

    For instance, it’s unlikely any party will be offering to cut energy bills in 2015 because the renewable bullshit comes from Europe. But there will be all sorts of posturing around getting a better deal for customers, simplifying tariffs, bashing energy companies and other guff.

  57. 57
    David Millie playing his fiddle says:

    My sperms are bigger than your sardines Ed

  58. 58
    Sir William Waad says:

    The Royal Food Bank of Scotland.

    Year 1: Receive Food Banking licence, entitling the owner to print food.

    Year 2: Lend food. Earn lots of Smarties in exchange. Pay bonuses of hundreds and thousand.

    Year 3: Borrow food on wholesale market and lend it sixteen times over to people who can’t afford to pay it back. Pay bonuses of millions of sugar doughnuts.

    Year 4: Press huge amounts of food on people who don’t want it. Back it with Collateralized Grub Obligations. Create massive eating bubble. Pay bonuses of tens of millions of sugar doughnuts and eat them all. Buy up other food banks at wild overvaluations.

    Year 5: Feel very sick. Puke all over taxpayers. Raid Tesco for bread.

    Years 10-14: Repeat.

  59. 59
    Cherie Booth QC says:


    No, Tony’s breath smells more of sushi

  60. 60
    The last BBC presenter not charged says:

    Gentlemen gentlemen

    Order order

    We are talking here about a future PM

    It is not the Morecomb and Wise Show

  61. 61
    Ofcom supervisor says:

    This is a family channel

    Please do not mention unnatural practices

  62. 62
    BBC Cunt says:

    Has he been reading Eric Cantona’s menmoirs

  63. 63
    Sit Petra says:

    I was just thinking Ed and a Pilchard have a certain synergy.

  64. 64
    Ex N Atlantic fisheries inspector says:

    What has actually happened is that the Spanish fishing mafia have bought up all the qupoas

    And they bung the inspectors and fish the seas clean

    No quarter etc

  65. 65
    Stephen Twigg says:

    There’s something fishy about Ed Miliband.

  66. 66
    Dr Rajgneroch Harkvgraard says:

    A sardine led inquiry

  67. 67
    Gordon McDoom says:


    That’s not a press relesase,its pathetic,
    When you lie..lie BIG..Really BIG.

    Here I’ll show you.
    Half a Trillion people rely on LABOUR food banks.

    Hungry for change? Our next action: transform crisis causing banks into food banks for poorandstarvinghardworkingfamilies.!

  68. 68
    Cornish Pilchard says:

    Before or after sex?

  69. 69
    The People's {union funded} Assembley says:

    Not many showed up did they?
    Bit disappointing.

  70. 70
    Cornish Pilchard says:

    How dare you….all those are human rights

  71. 71
    nellnewman says:

    Two of the biggest German companies involved in renewables, Bosch and Siemens have declared their losses in £billions and are making a fast exit from the green energy market.

    The idiocy of green energy has reached its peak and begun its decline and the german economy is going to be the one, in the next ten years, that takes a kicking over it.

    Let’s hope we have better sense and start to do something about fracking!

  72. 72
    Eddie UnWise says:

    The Manifesto wot i wrote, is largely blank.

  73. 73
    Cornish Pilchard says:

    How do you bracket me with THAT MAN

  74. 74
    Ministry of Sardines says:

    Sharing the sardines of growth. Predistribution of sardines. Too far, too sardines.

  75. 75
    nellnewman says:

    Morecambe and Wise were genuinely funny, talented, hardworking men and pretty good businessmen to boot.

    militwit has no such good points to recommend him!

  76. 76
    Political Correctness says:

    Ed is being discriminatory against a whole section of the aquatic end of the animal kingdom, not to mention impacting directly on the rights of sardine eaters of the UK.

    For balance, at least on the human side, he should consider banning Herring as well.

    Moving forward he will be subject to the wrath of the equal rights for fish commission which should be in solidarity with Unite Against Fascism on this ishoo.

  77. 77
    Sit Petra says:

    Pity they didn’t ban Snook, a south African tinned fish with the consistency of slime imported post war when rationing was still in place, even starving cats ran a mile at the smell of it.

  78. 78
    nellnewman says:


    Nope loads of empty seats. But then be fair would you turn up to listen to the likes of owenjones and ms lucas?!

    Only if an earthquake had knocked my house down and I had nowhere else to go to get out of the rain. And even then I’d think twice!!

  79. 79
    Realpolitik says:

    It would not take much effort to deal with the Spanish fishing problem.

    Navy should be able to keep them out of UK waters, and perhaps collaborate to keep them out of US, Icelandic and Canadian as well why they’re at it.

    The Spanish fleet itself should be easy to stop getting out of port with a sensible covert policy. Operation Hot-Paella could be put in to action.

    Perhaps if GCHQ / MI-6 pulled their fingers out on these more important problems rather than hanging out in a dark room reading private emails the UK could perhaps nudge ahead a little and fish stocks could recover.

  80. 80
    Clerk of Parliament says:

    So that’s why our Johhny Bercow gave up his wig

    He’s going to wear a burka

  81. 81
    nellnewman says:

    I have a horrid suspicion they used to put that into those little jars of fish paste my mother used to buy and then spread on my sandwiches for my school lunches.

    That’ll be why I didn’t do well at school.

  82. 82
    Sit Petra says:

    Sorry Pilch.

  83. 83
    Eddie UnWise says:

    Not only that Nell, but what is largely unknown any more was the UK benefits from the Marshall Plan.

    The USA put up a euro pot of £12,731 millions at 1948 prices. {$46,158 millions at today’s prices.}

    Germany, bombed flat and broke, depopulated, divided in two, got $1448
    The UK got $3297 – which was almost as much as Germany AND France combined.

    This was not a loan. It wasn’t a bond. It was foreign aid. And we paid nothing for it, and never have.
    Germany built its modern industrial economy with cash
    France built its modern transport networks

    What did Labour do with our share of the money? we had more, far more, than any other country. The US was extremely generous to the UK {knowing that they had been responsible in part for out=r immediate WW2 problems.}

    1/4 of all the Foreign aid for Europe they had. Where did it go?

  84. 84
    Historian says:

    Good thinking, Nelson

    The only problem is that we have no Fleet left to do the job

  85. 85
    Butch Dave says:

    I wouldn’t say no if Wendi wanted to switch allegiance from labour to the Conservatives

  86. 86
    nellnewman says:

    Never been to Mablethorpe – that’s up north! We don’t go up there- there’s funny folks up north!

    If we go to the sea from here we head to the Norfolk or Suffolk coasts. Norfolk and Suffolk folks are very friendly and don’t indulge in blue woad and stuff!!

  87. 87
    Sid James says:


  88. 88
    Glenda says:

    I was on that show .. remember? When I used to be talented.

  89. 89
    Historian says:

    Ground nut schemes and other stupidities

    And the fucking miners

  90. 90
    nellnewman says:

    I watched your portrayal of Elizabeth I – believe me you were not talented.

    Now Helen Mirren and Elizabeth I – there was talent!!

  91. 91
    Sit Petra says:

    A good thing times have changed, now we are in the EU we can all sit down to a hearty Donkey burger.

  92. 92
    Lord Cashpoint, real Labour says:

    That really does not matter dumbo

    We are making bloody millions in the markets

    Ed knows he is just our poodle

    We will look after him when thevtime comes as well

  93. 93
    non chese muncher says:

    Oh ffs is there no end to this an’s idiocy?

  94. 94
    non chese muncher says:


  95. 95
  96. 96
    nellnewman says:


  97. 97
    Newlyn Denzil says:

    You do realise that Sardines are just rebranded Pilchards Guido?

    Same fish, different names, different prices.

  98. 98
    ED Think Edited by Abbott says:

  99. 99
    Cardinal Biggles says:

    The Attlee government instituted the great ‘Tanganyika Ground Nut Scheme’ just after the war. It was a pity that they hadn’t discovered that the climate and soil were unsuitable and that they were using inappropriate machinery for the terrain.

    Needless to say, the scheme collapsed a few years later, having cost a shed load of money that the country didn’t have and producing no nutritious nuts to feed the locals or us.

    Another stupendously competent labour government project.

  100. 100
    Ed Miliband to ban Cornish Sardines aka rebranded Cornish Pilchards says:

    Who are you calling pilchard? It’s ‘Cornish sardine’ to you…

    In a rebranding exercise that would put even the most cunning of Downing Street spin-doctors to shame, the half-forgotten and ever-so-humble pilchard has been rechristened and is now selling by the boat-load. Arise, the Cornish sardine.


  101. 101
    Bert says:

    Sardines have been learnt. It is time to move on.

  102. 102
    Ed's Mum says:

    Think differently about his brother?

  103. 103
    Impressario says:

    I really think Stringfellow should hire Ed as a minor cabaret artiste

    He has missed his calling

    He is naturally gauche, has a natural lithhp and has a face which makes you laugh

    And he does not even need to change his speechwriter

    He is a perfect bufoon

  104. 104

    Its a brilliant and accurate article. Good old Corelli. No wonder the left hated him. The last line of the piece is the best.

    “What a monumental waste of a great and unrepeatable opportunity. “

  105. 105
    Sit Petra says:

    Life, the universe and everything.

  106. 106
    The Bristish public says:

    About being such a loser?

  107. 107
    RetardEd Militwat, sucking a fishermans friend, revving up a 12 cylinder bandwagon and the next PM says:

    Tough on pilchards, tough on the causes of pilchards.

    One nathan.

  108. 108
    Having a hooter says:

    I am a circumcised animal

    Leave me out ofbthis

  109. 109
    Realpolitik says:

    Procuring the fleet would be a good macro boost for the economy.

    Taking out the Spanish fleet in their ports, Operation Hot-Paella, does not require a fleet.

    Just trained chaps who can blend in with a few limpet mines.

  110. 110
    G. Brown-Miliband's mentor. says:

    British jobs for British workers! No more Sardinians to take our jobs!

  111. 111
    Anonymous says:

    Sorry about that.

  112. 112
    Bert says:

    Nell — try the whitebait at the Red Lion in Stiffkey.

  113. 113
    Bert says:

    About breathing?

  114. 114
    West Indian Mother says:

    Why don’t they have this pointless private conversation in private … and why is it here?

  115. 115
    Dave the Rave says:

    Thank God for Ed

    He saves me every time

    Next PMSs will be Sardine Edition


  116. 116
    Conspiracy Watch says:

    Michael Hastings: An updated K’elly – Boston Brakes ?

    Killing journalists not cool. Guido be safe.

  117. 117
    Cardinal Biggles says:

    He’s making all the right policies, but not necessarily in the right order!

  118. 118
    Diane Abbot's inner voice says:

    Think differently about a career. Please say it. I could do his job. mmm…. Chicken…

  119. 119
    genghiz the kahn says:

    Miliband proves that he hasn’t mastered joined up whiting, the whole speech is a load of pollocks.

  120. 120
    Stephanie Flanders says:

    I wish he would think differently about me. I still love him.

  121. 121
    Cherie Booth QC says:

    Oh, for heaven’s sake. I was clearly making an hilarious joke about my husband’s sexual antics with that Chinese slapper. You owe me £10,000 for reading your post and another £100,000 for this reply (written by my p.a.)

  122. 122
    Bigoted Gordon Brown says:

    British Pilchards for British Fisherman.

  123. 123

    Sardines are one of the things I really miss, but on balance I will take no sardines as the price of no tax

  124. 124
    Thick Labour voter says:

    Ed is banning sardines and no cuts. Hoorah!

  125. 125
    Fishy says:


  126. 126
    David Miliband says:

    I wish he would think differently about going into politics and running for Labour Leader with Union backing.

  127. 127
    The People of Sardegna says:

    If we really wanted to do so, we could raise an unholy row about this being some sort of ethnic slur against us– imagine, including us in a spoof photo of “Prime Minister” Ed Miliband! The ignominy!

  128. 128
    nellnewman says:

    Thank you Bert – indeed we will.

    We’re planning to spend some time on that coast this summer holidays with YoungNells. Sailing at Brancaster – beachcombing at West Runton, enjoying the cooked crab sandwiches at Cromer and whitebait at Stiffkey.

    Sounds perfect!!

  129. 129
    Anonymous says:

    Memo to Miliband.

    1. Very few people gives a toss about sardines.

    2.On the question of great things a government is remembered by, try to set your sights a tad higher than a sardine ban.

    3.The last wartime sardine died in 2011, eaten by a Sid Robbins, the last whitey in Plastow. He recently emigrated to Somalia saying he was fed up with foreigners.

    3. What imports the next government will be able to ban without EU approval are listed in Appendix 1 for your assistance.

    4. If you have nothing useful to say, say nothing.

    Appendix 1.

  130. 130
    nellnewman says:


  131. 131

    WTF – so many copy cats (and now dogs). I am really that good to warrant all this attention.

  132. 132
    Dianne Abbot's Public Twitter says:

    Whiting always love playing divide and rule

  133. 133

    No. Particularly not whilst using my moniker.

  134. 134
    Cardinal Biggles says:

    He is the Bud Flanagan of politics.

    Like Bud (né Chaim Reuben Weintrop), Ed is of Polish J*wish ancestry. However, as far as I know, Bud’s forebears didn’t go in for fighting for the Russians against the Poles.

  135. 135

    I do not eat anything from the sea. Your use of my moniker is rather fishy.

  136. 136
    Mark Wouters. says:

    All govermnet Ministers and ex government ministers and civil servants need to be Prosecuted for allowing Nuclear power stations to be Built ,and for contaminating the environment and Human beings,and for exporting or allowing the export/import of torture equipment/ weapons, and for the export and import of Guns ammunition and other weapons of war.including raw materials to produce weapons of mass destruction.
    Also all government ministersand ex-government ministers , civil servants and others in connection with chemical weapons manufacture (export and import and of helping /aiding foreign governments with intelligence ,regime change and torture of innocent people worldwide.
    All the above including the condem government MUST NOW BE BROUGHT TO JUSTICE.

  137. 137
    genghiz the kahn says:
  138. 138
    Albert hall says:

    He’s forgotten the groundnut scheme then.

  139. 139
    Jack says:


    Please find out for us who wrote this d r I v e l for Ed

    If he wrote it himself, he is even worse than we thought and nearly sectionable like his old boss

    Or is imbecility contagious?

  140. 140
    J.Frost says:

    Think Ed is trawling the bottom on this one!

    That should make room for another few comments

  141. 141
    RetardEd Militwat, sucking a fishermans friend, revving up a 12 cylinder bandwagon and the next PM says:

    That wath thewioth! Itth jtht a thame that when ve were in power, ve didn’t thtop all thoth foweinerth coming in and fuçking up ve economy – you know, Goldman Sacth.

  142. 142
    Alex Jones Is Sane [From the Broadmoor Special Cases Unit] says:

    People of the world, don’t listen to Milliband. He is a Bilderberger! The sardines are a metaphor for the people and the plan among the Rothchilds to eliminate at least 97.4% of the global population by May 4th. 2019. This is the Global Rothschild Plan to be implemented by the Bilderberg Committee and legions of David Icke followers as David Icke is only a cover man for the global reckoning that will come about through a shift in the currency that will devastate the world and cause famine and pestilence.

  143. 143
    ure a wanker says:

    nah, the taxpayer is funding fucking companies like ATOS and A4e and other to do the dirty work for them – happy now!!!

  144. 144
    Russell Brand, Jeremy Hardy, Jimmy Carr, Jo Brand, David Mitchell, Charlie Brooker, Marcus Big-cock says:

    ‘Morecambe and Wise were genuinely funny, talented, hardworking men…’

    Funny? Talented? What’s that, Nell? We don’t understand what these words mean.

  145. 145
    ure a wanker says:

    you really are thick nell

  146. 146
    Impressario says:

    Thank you your excellency

    There are also serious questions about polish j’ws and stalinism after WW II

    Berman and co

    I was in Warsaw recently and they are still trying to find the remains of many patriots killed by the murdering Communists..like Anton Pilecki who volunteered to go to Aus ch witz and escaped to tell the story – killed by communist j’ews in 48..

  147. 147
    Wallace says:

    I think I’ll have some sardines with my cheese, eh Grommit?

  148. 148
  149. 149

    Agree completely. I have a curious and secretive habit of saving articles which I consider to be of high merit and re-reading them at some future time when an internet link is not available. I have done so with this one.

    My only surprise is that the BBC have felt it safe to publish.

  150. 150
    Sit Petra says:

  151. 151

    You two make me feel quite young. ;-)

    *BTW The comfy chair is ready*

  152. 152
    RED ED - SON OF BROWN says:

    Ich bin ein Sardiner !

  153. 153
    Bob the Builder says:

    Interesting background


  154. 154
    nellnewman says:

    Bless! little troll.

    If you think relying on foodbanks rather than earning your own money and growing your own food is bright – I suspect ’tis you who is a few pence short of a shilling!!

  155. 155
    Arfur Panda-Tupnyrice says:

    Somebody on here a few days ago stated that she was a Chinese plant – I think they meant agent rather than bamboo, but you can never be too sure…

  156. 156
    Wyle Cop says:

    The invoice plopped on the mat.

  157. 157
    Sit Petra says:

    Makes a change, no longer a doughnut?.

  158. 158
    nellnewman says:

    russellbrand etc are the product of labour’s years – they were nurtured by the labour government to make comedy as unfunny as possible – laughter was not regarded as good for the working classes.

    Misery was bes. That way gordon thought he could persuade everybody to vote for him as the only funny man in the universe.

  159. 159

    NHS executives in ‘cover-up’ may be stripped of pensions Jeremy Hunt


    About time all those who mismanaged the affairs of the state should cease to be recipients of its munificence.

  160. 160
    Schrödinger's Dog (By Appointment To, and Under Licence From, Schrödinger's Cat) says:

    Brisling. Now.

  161. 161
    BarryW says:

    The cost of nationalisation, and paying too much compensation for clapped out industrial plant.

  162. 162

    The bung is what makes state employment so agreeable for too many who entered public service during the last decade and a half.

    A number of nights of the long knives are required which will save the public purse a large amount of money.

  163. 163
    nellnewman says:

    For the Nth time he did NOT say he would keep the cuts.

    He said he will have to identify where he can get money from to fund spending – they’ll be raising taxes as they always do and they’ll keep on spending as they always have. labour is NOT a safe pair of hands for our economy.

    Read his speech and NEVER trust what a politician is saying because what you think they are saying is NEVER what they are saying!!!

  164. 164
    Madiba says:

    As I reflect on my long life, I just wish I’d had more threesomes.

  165. 165

    A red-herring, more like.

  166. 166
    nellnewman says:

    Stripping them of their pensions would be a good thing but it isn’t enough when at least 14 babies died because of their cover-up.

    There must at least be a prosecution for manslaughter or something and andyburnham and aljohnson must be included on the charge sheet.

  167. 167
    nellnewman says:

    If someone else wrote you a speech like that would you agree to read it out in public?

    Surely that makes the reader as big an idiot as the writer?!!

  168. 168
    Anonymous says:

    I think they are best described as defishient.

  169. 169
    Sit Petra says:

    So is that a good thing or a bad thing Ed?, do tell!.

  170. 170
    Alex, that fat Scotch bloke says:

    150 odd entries – and not one mentioned me. Surely you have not all forgotten me?

  171. 171
    M102 says:

    What a wanker.

  172. 172
    V1le Labour trashed my Country says:

    Is this the sum total of the brilliance of Ed Multimillionaireband? F so it bodes well for the future of the Labour Party.

  173. 173
    i don't n eed no doctor says:

    Calm down Nell it’s only a commercial.

  174. 174
    Is that an alarm bell I hear? says:

    A small paragraph in my paper today which states that the EU are drawing up Europe-wide (including non-euro countries) plans to raid bank customers’ accounts as a matter of course to bail out the failing banks they keep their cash in.

    Better get your savings into Swiss francs or Singapore dollars while you still have time. You have been warned.

  175. 175
    Neo Nut Cases says:

    How is good labour girl nigella today. Has her nasty Tory husband been charged yet….scum bag bully wank stain

  176. 176
    Maqboul says:

    One would expect little else from the oily little bastard.

  177. 177

    I do not disagree with what you say, nell.

    But do not see why the taxpayer should be paying pensions to anyone who did not run public affairs properly.

    The possibility of discontinuing the pensions of some 80,000 or more people could save us £6.5bn a year every year. Think what that would do to eliminate the deficit and pay down debt!

    Naturally, that would not be the end of the matter for some. But we must get the books right first.

  178. 178
    Neo Nut Cases says:

    Oh dear…looks like langsley was involved in quality care commission cover up….what did dave and hunt know !!!!

  179. 179
  180. 180
    Neo Nut Cases says:

    Fuck off expat….nothing here concerns you

  181. 181
    M102 says:

    Give it a rest nell. Are you on speed or something?

  182. 182
    Russell Brand, Messiah, says:

    Actually, I did put a couple of Septics in their place the other morning– no thanks to my fellow Briton, the Beeb’s Katty Kay, who was about as useful as a rubber crutch:

  183. 183
    Anonymous says:

    I think you are hampered by having “pride”. It is a serious disease that inflicts certain people, and stops them just getting what they believe they deserve.

    There is no cure, and is cause by a restricted diet of the greed propaganda.

  184. 184
    UKIP or bust says:

    Guido, your caption, “When I’m Prime Minister . . . ”

    made me and Mrs. Bust laugh out loud.

  185. 185
    Schroedinger's Pilchard says:

    Ed’s a wave-cist!

  186. 186

    Do tell us about the ones you did have!

    There are people here who would really like to know:
    * How many times?
    * What sex?
    * Did it go soft in the middle?
    * Any small fluffy animals?
    * Double-entry bookkeeping?
    * Did any of their mothers walk in?

    Whilst on the subject, my mate from NSA has just dropped in with my glass of milk. Do you want to buy any of the pictures of yourself?

  187. 187
    Tay King-dePisse says:

    I wish you would think differently about ever returning to the UK, Banana Boy; for you, when daylight come, please doan wan go home.

  188. 188
    albacore says:

    So Eddie’s ready to repel the tiddlers
    What of the rest of the invading diddlers?
    The fishiest policy in creation
    Is the LibLabCon one of immigration

  189. 189

    That is hitting the trough.

  190. 190
    Anonymous says:

    Whatcha gunna do when they all say nooo………….

  191. 191
    Tom Watson MP says:

    It happens– one day you’re their favourite butt, and then the next day they forget all about you.

    Sad, really; makes you want to cry sometimes, like the big drama queen you are, but then you steel yourself and say, “I’ll be back! You haven’t heard the last from Fat Bastard! Ignore me? You’re going to fuckin’ regret that!”

  192. 192
    Anonymous says:

    It would be a bad move to start stripping pensions. Think of the corruption and false blame that would result.

    The simple fact is that anyone that covers up any failing, that results in loss of life or injury, without the oversight of elected representatives, should be in prison.

    Their pension should be removed for the time they are imprisoned.

    I have the names of a few tax paid killers that could be used to prove out the system.

  193. 193
    Axe The Telly Tax & Religion & Kill All Ecoloons says:

    Unite Against Fishism?

    I’ll get me coat ;-)

  194. 194
    John Prescott "Fat Barsteward" says:

    I’m on a seafood diet, i see food and i eat it.

  195. 195
    Raving Loon says:


    If the government isn’t actually cutting spending, what are we actually talking about. I’m assuming that everyone knows the truth so I’m curious why there seems to be a big debate about something which isn’t happening.

  196. 196
    EppingBlogger says:

    I just knew it – foreign exchange controls and import quotas. Will Cameron match this promise?

  197. 197
    Lord Farridge of UKIP says:

    Sardines have yuman rites too

  198. 198
    nellnewman says:

    A very labour/marxist nonsense anon.

    we should all do the best for ourselves and families that we can without relying on government to turn us into muppets.

    labour of course prefers muppets they thinks muppets are more likely to vote for them than anybody else.

  199. 199
    NSA Listening post GB.00236.MenwithHill says:

    Everything you do concerns us.

  200. 200
    nellnewman says:

    You think it odd to enjoy Norfolk Whitebait in a fine pub?

    Strange person!

  201. 201
    nellnewman says:

    It must be that fresh spinach and coriander I’m using in my cooking , out of my garden.

    Fresh is best!

  202. 202
    nellnewman says:

    Too true SC – cut the pensions but also prosecute these marxist leftovers from the brown/bliar era who want to suppress the working classes and elevate themselves for ever increasing amounts of pensions, expenses, monies and honours ,whilst doing a really criminal job in delivering worthless public services!!

  203. 203
    The EU has failed says:

    Millitwit said he was going to tax bankers’ bonuses. But they already are taxed. What a dickhead.

  204. 204
    The EU has failed says:

    Next he will be saying that NHS nurses and doctors are going to treat patients with some dignity. Oh no he will never say that.

  205. 205
    tommy dorsey says:

    can you can-can
    like a sardine can?

  206. 206
    a black marketeer says:

    sardines are for selling not eating

  207. 207

    Don’t you mean half a million lefties depend on the propaganda they spread on the back of these “food banks”. I believe they are just a propaganda tool created by the left with which to bash the current government because their precious Labour Party are out of power. Advertise anything you are giving away for free and you will get a queue forming because Labour have created a “something for nothing” society.

    Stand on a street corner and throw £5 notes about and you’ll son have a rush of people picking up every note they can get their grubby hands on – not because they are needy, but because they are greedy.

  208. 208
    Cardinal Biggles says:

    Thanks for the offer of the seat. Cardinal Fang has sent our comfy chair out for re-upholstering.

    I’m not quite old enough to remember this glorious scheme personally, although I was alive during its institution. It sticks in my mind because my dad used to laugh about it, as well as the great idea of feeding us Snook, which some other commenter hereabouts referred to.

  209. 209

    The best part of Ed Miliband ran down his dad’s leg.

  210. 210
    Tyke says:

    A fish always rots from the Ed first!

  211. 211
    The Dirty Rat says:

    Did your mum feed you a spoonful of Virol each day? Mine did and not a sign of rickets and all those other nasty childhood diseases. I heard that it is good for erectile dysfunction too. It’s on the shopping list for Monday.

  212. 212
    NE Frontiersman says:

    Pilchards with better PR; let them eat Snoek, I say.

  213. 213
    Pundit Too says:

    I checked on Guido’s fishy story and also read the wikipedia article on Clement Atlee. Obviously Labour activists are monitoring this since based on this heroic dialogue Atlee should be in line for a sainthood.
    However when you read the economic history of Atlee’s term as PM then things start to go very wrong. Rationing in Britain increased after the end of WWII and did not end at all during his tenure. It actually ended in 1954 under the conservatives.
    The lie was given that it was increased and extended due to supplying the European regions under our control, but this is now proving to be false, especially as these regions stopped rationing well before Britain.
    No mention of the dock strikes during Attlee’s Labour Party period or the army having to take over the docks – nor the lack of rebuilding of houses and of war damage.
    I saw most of the effects of rationing as a young boy but could not understand why bomb damage in central Birmingham was still very evident as late as the mid 60’s when I left the country.

  214. 214
    Schrödinger's Dog (By Appointment To, and Under Licence From, Schrödinger's Cat) says:

    Got any Norwegian Brisling?

  215. 215
    NE Frontiersman says:

    Considering that German and Japanese industries and cities were flattened, rather than tired-out, the disparity in reinvestment doesn’t seem too huge. We had NATO and UN obligations that Barnett doesn’t mention, quite apart from a creaking empire to close down while avoiding collapse. Would he prefer that Germany had been rearmed straight after the war to relieve us of them? We’d have been faced with something much worse than the Berlin Airlift.
    There are some easy, and not entirely honest, shots here.

  216. 216
    NE Frontiersman says:

    The idea was to produce politically-secure fuel, a green, renewable idea ahead of its time that would enrich colonies moving towards independence. It groaned under the weight of its good intentions. Remind you of windfarms, anyone?

  217. 217
    Red Ed Millibandwagon says:

    I know nothing, so nothing new there then

  218. 218
    Mummy Darling 1940's type says:

    Don’t forget to take your Cod Liver Oil, dear
    Can only have the Orange juice after the Cod Liver Oil and Molasses treacle.

  219. 219
    The No(w) Show says:

    We rely on papering the walls and electronic laughter machines that a BBC employee actually invented.

  220. 220
    polythesis says:

    What millibrain is not saying is that his fanatical support for the EU means even if God forbid he became PM he would not have any power to dictate to his EU masters, his job would be to be an unquestioning stooge of the Brussels Mafiosi.

    As a stooge satrap of the EU he would take his orders and obey them regardless of the damage to the UK, the disastrous consequences of letting any of the liblabcon fraudsters rule after 2015 is to awful to contemplate, none of them dare stand up to the EU monster.

  221. 221
    The No(w) Show says:

    No but we have a few quislings.

  222. 222
    j bercow says:

    my house constantly smells of fish

  223. 223
    Cardinal Biggles says:

    No, just cod liver oil (shudder).

  224. 224
    Cardinal Biggles says:

    Is there a memorial to the vicar in the loin cage?

    I’ve not been to Stiffkey, though I’ve got to say that I do like East Anglia.

  225. 225
    Fabians are evil says:

    Better he ban all the Marxist labour MP.’s if he really cares about the UK

  226. 226
  227. 227
  228. 228

    I have just watched the George Osborne cartoon – now I understand that the Govt has made cuts – eg welfare and housing benefits. The fact that overall spending has gone up does not mean there have not been cuts. Sorry for missing the point earlier.

  229. 229
    S. Dog says:

    BW, thanks.
    Have just ordered the last remaining used copy from Amazon, for a couple of quid (which, of course, has probably just set off alarms with Prism and GCHQ).

  230. 230

    Have just sobbered up – sorry for the arsehole comment earlier.

  231. 231
    Airey Belvoir says:

    A spoonful of Radio Malt daily, delicious.

  232. 232
    Thicko Labour voter says:


    Labour may support cuts but their voters do not. Will Comrade McCluski carry out his threat & stop funding Labour if they continue to support cuts? What a mess!

  233. 233
    Gaston says:

    Ban sardines?

    That’s right…but only if the focus groups tell me it’ll be a hit with women voters.

  234. 234
    Anonymous says:

    Reverse the cuts? What cuts? The debt will double by 2015, nice one Dave.

  235. 235
    terrytory says:

    Scott’s Emulsion, California Syrup of Figs, Numol, Andrew’s Liver Salts

  236. 236
    Cornish Pilchard says:

    Arent you supposed to be out looking for a job?

  237. 237
    The Bleedin Oblivious says:

    It would be easier to recover bad debts. Just stick your fingers down the bastards throats.

  238. 238
    Old crone says:

    I had a very large tablespoonful of what was termed “Malt” to swallow daily. But I don’t think it did me any harm. Burble burble..

  239. 239
    Old crone says:

    Yay! Is that famous bonfire of the qangos about to happen? I’ll just pop into town for a few packets of popcorn

  240. 240
    Old crone says:

    Oily, smell and generally bad for you?

  241. 241
    Hookline and Sinker, Attorneys at law says:

    That’s what happens when you live exclusively on a diet of tinned fish…

    … and you had always thought that fish was good for the brain, didn’t you?

  242. 242
    Bix Beiderbecke says:

    It ain’t what you do it’s the way that you do it….

  243. 243
    Spede Freke says:

    There is no way that sardines should ever be allowed on the outside lane. Their maximum speed is only about 4mph.

  244. 244
    Jeffrey "George" Osborne says:

    Let those poor little sardines out of their dreadful little tins

  245. 245
    lunch for under a euro says:

    If I want a cheap meal at lunchtime when I am abroad I often open a tin of sardines dressed in olive oil and mix it with a bit of salad.

    I did not know the Government had stopped you doing this in the UK.

  246. 246
    Jeffrey "George" Osborne says:

    The world needs more ground nuts

  247. 247
    fartinatrance says:

    If I eat enough sardines will I get any idea how to run a country?

  248. 248
    E Cantona says:

    When the seagulls follow the trawler, it is because they think sardines will be thrown into the sea.

  249. 249
    Capt' Birdseye says:

    Very fishy!

  250. 250
    Capt' Birdseye says:

    Do you think Millitwat, Balls and co, could organise themselves to get into a tin?

  251. 251
    Tom Catesby says:

    Those responsible for this cover up of a cover up must be culpable for these deaths!

  252. 252
    Tom Catesby says:

    Tough on sardines, tough on the causes of sardines!

  253. 253
    Tom Catesby says:

    ignore it!

  254. 254
    Tom Catesby says:

    Plan ‘B’. Rebrand all ‘sardines’ as ‘pilchards’.

  255. 255
    Tom Catesby says:

    No… The money doesn’t go far enough, we are talking the WORKING poor with families, apparently they are statistically the largest group in receipt of ‘food bank’ support. That suggests WAGES are too low and COST of LIVING is too high. Does that help you any?

  256. 256
    Tom Catesby says:

    Has Millitwat been misquoted? Did he actually say’, ‘I’ll ban Sardinians. As there will be no room after the next east european influx come Jan’ 2014′. It really will feel like living in a sardine can, especially in some of the more well known urban toilets.

  257. 257
    Sit Petra says:


  258. 258
    lojolondon says:

    Atlee is his hero, but his old boss, Crash Gordon had the opposite policy. So which one will eventually be Milibang’s policy?

  259. 259
    Cornish Pilchard says:

    Care in the community gone wrong

    Will someone please give Ed his Meds

  260. 260
    broderick crawford says:

    has any body yet got to the “bottom”of whether the oriental pubis is profiled in portrait or landscape mode .

    rumours abound but sadly i have not had the opportunity of personal discovery thus am asking the question of hyper reliable sources on this blog. thank you.

  261. 261
    broderick crawford says:

    i bet jeffrey osborne you know the person who musically makes a contribution to society like sardines george.

    They are rich in omega 3 and give him vim brio and zip.

    Unlike most heavy caloried offerings available at the savoy grill or simpsons in the strand which induce only post prandial lethargy somnolence and inertia …… George.

  262. 262
    broderick crawford says:

    Personally i prefer anchovies with lashings of garlic and raw onions in a vindaloo curry .

    now that s what you call truly bad breath .

  263. 263
    broderick crawford says:

    many a true word said in jest bleedin’….

    indeed in roman times when the nobility indulged in three day long orgies of all kinds but mostly delicious food and heavenly drink their slaves were at the end of every meal duty bound to tickle their master s throat until he puked everything up such that he was ready to partake at the next session of gastro excess…

    suit ole watson what ??

  264. 264
    7Kiwi says:

    Ed Miliband: Tough on sardines and tough on the causes of sardines.

  265. 265
    Anonymous says:

    If they vote Labour we will allow more into the UK

  266. 266
    EdEdRed (not an Anglo-Saxon, just a couple of Lefties) says:

    Did Atlee’s gov’t actually ban the importation of small fry, or did it just stop spending tax-payers’ money on them?

    There is a difference.

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