June 19th, 2013

Media Bitch Fight: Mandrake v Sarah Sands

It’s all kicking off between Tim Walker of the Telegraph’s Mandrake diary and Sarah Sands, Standard editor, over the Charles Saatchi / Nigella Lawson assault or gentle tiff, depending on your viewpoint.

Should be noted that Saatchi is an occasional Standard columnist.

And in joins Louise Mensch:

Interesting that Walker’s dinner question went unanswered…


  1. 1
    nellnewman says:

    Assault is assault.

    You can call it anything else you like but it wonlt make the crime any less serious.

    And the Standard has a nerve to purport to spe@k for Nigella when she hasn’t chosen to say a word about it as yet. Talk about putting words in people’s mouths – that propaganda not serious journalism.

  2. 2
    horsetraders says:

    You have a nerve purporting to purport in defence of Nigella. How do you know she doesn’t support the Standard reporting?

    I have a nerve purporting to purport….

    OH EVERYONE JUST GO BACK TO THEIR OWN LIVES. It might be the police’s business as well as the couple’s, but it sure as hell ain’t none of ours.

  3. 3
    Mark Wouters says:

    When was the Last time a Member of Parliament had his pay stopped for 5 weeks and did not even have a slice of bread ??? and have no savings??? and have debt heaped upon you.

  4. 4
    Ejukated underr Layber says:

    You need keyboard training.

  5. 5
    Ed Dafty, LimpDim MP, Climate Change Chieftain says:

    I have never me Derek, LibDem Council leader.

  6. 6
    Tooth fairy says:

    Interesting that he accepted a Police caution. Therefore fingerprints, photographs, DNA taken .

    Hope our politicians don’t now associate themselves with a criminal after all public life should be clean and open no?

  7. 7
    nellnewman says:

    I wonder whether the Evening Standard would have been as supportive of davidcameron if he had been the one photographed assaulting his wife?

  8. 8
    Lord Sir Domly Dom says:

    “Assault is assault”

    Except when it is forplay. Thanks to the 50 shades book. LOTS of women are now playing at things that used to be classed as assault. Could Nigella be into it too now?

  9. 9
    Lord Sir Domly Dom says:

    Lots of people are jumping to conclusions based on almost no evidence. My take on it? I DO NOT KNOW IF IT WAS AN ASSAULT OR NOT!

    It could have been, or it could have been consensual kink play. Only Nigella and Saatchi himself know for certain.

  10. 10

    Emotionally led intuitive judgements may lead to mistaken conclusions.

  11. 11
    Carry Hole is a porcine homunculus says:


    What is the carbon footprint, after all, if not the gaseous equivalent of Original Sin, the stain we inflict on Mother Gaia?

  12. 12
    Carry Hole is a porcine homunculus says:

    or Lithium.

  13. 13
    Mark Wouters says:

    Why is it if there are to be Homeeless that there are no Members of parliament or the Police force Homeless,and why is it Less then 2Percent are females,i want answers from all members of Parliament .

  14. 14
    Wouldn't mind choking this cock says:

  15. 15
    CS is a pathetic wife beater says:

    Does this really look like a “playful tiff”? It’s vile, abusive and violent.

  16. 16
    Just A Thought says:

    If you read the Sentencing Guideline for a s.39 Common Assault with domestic violence at its heart you will find several aggravating features; breach of trust, who was present during the assault and was the assault in public. All qualify in this case and Charles was lucky to have been offered a Caution. If he had been from the lower orders he would have been charged with Common Assault and faced a court appearance with all the indignity that implies…

  17. 17
    Fredo Corleone says:

    “Oh, that was nothin’! Moe didn’t mean nothin’ by that… sure, he flies off the handle once in awhile, but Moe and me, we’re good friends…”

  18. 18
    Louise says:

    “Well its non of my business if a husband throttles his missus infront of me.
    – never saw a thing officer.”

  19. 19
    Carry Hole is a porcine homunculus says:

    Status Update
    By Nigel Coghill-Marshall

    Sir Alan Beith, Lib Dem MP for Berwick has been reported as asking a question in the HoC regarding devolution for the North East of England. His party leader, the so called Deputy PM, one Nick Clegg stated that he thought that it would be a good idea. The question and the answer show how wide the gulf between the party known as the LibDems and the electorate has become.

    The people of the North East, by way of referendum, rejected the call for a North East Regional Assembly much to the chagrin of john Prescott. The peoples of both County Durham and Northumberland rejected calls for the abolition of their district councils in favour of unitary County councils too. Although both these views were ignored and we each had County Councils foisted upon us. For the LibDems to continue to pursue the argument for regional government flies in the face of all, that we, the people want.

    However, I predict again, as I did during the 2010 General election campaign that there will be an enforced amalgamation of Durham and Northumberland Councils within the next five years to bring about a regional government. Something of course which is in the long term plans of the EU.

    The UKIP branch in Alnwick totally condemns the idea of regional government for the North east of England and calls for the restoration of District Councils that will truly represent the views and intersts of local people.

  20. 20
    Maximus says:

    Have you tried writing them?

  21. 21
    This is what should happen to wife beaters says:

  22. 22
    M102 says:

    I would recommend selling the keyboard and buying a loaf of bread.

  23. 23
    fitz fitzgerald says:

    Its all so NORTH LONDON : one woman said to another this afternoon at Fortnum’s soda fountain …

  24. 24
    Kateesh'a says:

    The unwashed hair, the ruined face, the wreckage of the lips : is that what provok’d him ? ?

  25. 25
    Kateesh'a says:


  26. 26
    Kateesh'a says:

    Who took the pictures ?

  27. 27
    Anonymous says:

    More fool you if you dont put some money aside for situations like that, you really must be thick if you dont even have a slice of bread.

  28. 28
    Anonymous says:

    I think we all know the answer to that one !

  29. 29
    Anonymous says:

    At a rough guess i would say they have enough money not to rely on benefits or council housing.You do realise that not everybody depends on the state dont you ?

  30. 30
    Chris Patten says:

    A bloke can’t even give his wife a good beating these days.

  31. 31
    TPA says:

    who gives a fuck what Mensch thinks.

    in when she is right, as she is here, i still want her to just FUCK OFF

  32. 32
    Lord Sir Domly Dom says:

    It looks like forplay to me.

  33. 33
    Smack my bitch up says:

    She might enjoy a bit of domination. Let’s be honest, she looks like the sort that would!

  34. 34
    he really thinks we're all that daft says:

    If that’s how Saatchi behaves when being playful, I’d hate to see him when he means it.

  35. 35
    hit him where it hurts says:

    She looked utterly bereft when leaving the restaurant.
    I’m no fan of Nigella, but I felt really sorry for her.

  36. 36
    it's not rocket science says:

    It would be very hard to get people to vote for you if you were a scummy vagrant sponging off the state.

  37. 37
    cheese and pickle says:

    When my other half offered a “Homeless and Hungry” person a sarnie, they were told to F*ck Off.

  38. 38
    Larry The Cat says:

    I am a bit more concerned about the way that today’s HRA judgement on the Army will undermine our ability to fight wars or even defend ourselves. Officers are now in an impossible position.

    Time for a derrogation

  39. 39
    Larry The Cat says:

    I assume you have had your benefits stopped, The question is why?

  40. 40
    I hate Hugh Grant cos he's a moron says:

    As he admits being given a police caution the police MUST have spoken to Nigella & SHE must not have supported his excuse that it was just a friendly tiff. Also it screws up future travel to the States

  41. 41
    Ranter says:


  42. 42
    Taxpayer says:

    Both policemen and MPs do rely on the state (ie us) for their money

  43. 43
    Lionel Hutz, attorney of law says:

    Madness to accept a caution, I always advise my clients to say nothing.

  44. 44
    Tom Catesby says:

    Who gives a f^ck about this middle class, metropolitan kosher w^nk fest. Is there nothing better to report? If they want to knock the f^ck out of each other, I’ll offer to hold their coats, if I can be bothered.

  45. 45
    Anonymous says:

    But they do actually work.
    Admittedly MP’s don’t appear to work as hard as the rest of us mere mortals and are entitled to huge amounts in benefits plus ridiculously long holidays.
    People lying on the pavement looking unkempt with a flea bitten dog and a sign aren’t working.

  46. 46
    mraemiller says:

    Man who’s taste in art is Chapman bro’s prosthetic moulded statues of children with genitalia in place of facial features may have problems with sexual relationships shock

    Still it isn’t child porn because someone with more money than sense bought it

  47. 47
    olden1936 says:

    I agree it is not anyone else’s business even though the scene was foisted upon us all via the TV, but public throat-clutching of one’s wife surely can’t be regarded as the acceptable behavior of a British gentleman? The man is a cad!!!

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