May 21st, 2013

TORY WARS: Madness Continues

In the Times this morning, a Tory Cabinet Minister moans “They’re mad.  It’s about disloyalty rather than ideology. You can’t win with these people by pandering to them.” In the Western Morning News, Tory MP Gary Streeter laments that “once more the familiar glint in the swivelled-eyes of the purists who are prepared to sacrifice all to get Britain out of Europe”. Should calm things down…


  1. 1
    Call me Dave says:

    Why is everyone out of step but me and my chums?

    • 7
      V1le, vicious Labour ruined my Country says:

      The bribery of UK politicians by the eu must be massive. It’s the only explanation.

      • 24
        JH32489238490234 says:

        I agree.

        The only question that can come out of the search to explain their behaviour is – ‘who do they serve?’

        Once you stop assuming it is anyone with a historical attachment or loyalty to this island it becomes much, much easier to understand.

        • 36
          ancientpopeye says:

          Streeter, the Hon Member for Plymouth has never impressed me.

          • What a gay day says:

            Don’t look into Cameron’s eyes at top – I did, and it took me a good ten minutes to come back to my senses.

          • Anonymous says:

            I dont think he is very keen on you either !

          • My local MP who warms up Dave’s loo seat and puts toothpaste on his brush, mostly replies to my concerns with a dismissive “I hear what you say, but we know best”.

            These patronising missives have a strong pong of “we don’t give a flying fuck what you think and our dear leader will continue to print money, sustain ZIRP, protect TPTB/TBTF and rape savers to reward spenders”, so go swivel.

        • 60
          Pollytwaddle says:

          Whom, JH. Whom.

        • 75
          Parker says:

          the EU serves capital, in the same way the established parties of the UK do.

          their is a real argument to leave the EU, but it comes from the left and not the right.

          the EU is destroying workers rights, implementing savage austerity, destroying pensions, pandering to the mindless stupidity of the financial markets etc. it must finish, but not on UKIP’s terms.

      • 25
        Faceless Bureaucrat says:

        So, what are the Bookies Odds on Cameron being ousted before the next General Election?…

        • 83
          Parker says:

          electoral oblivion beckons if they do.

        • 170
          Anonymous says:

          Why the sudden media push to discredit the PM ? none of the things they are currently whingeing about are as bad as an illegal war, people “committing siucide” in fields, or selling off our gold at rock bottom prices.All of which didnt command the amount of coverage as “gay marriage” what is going on ?

        • 187
          Yawn says:

          It’ll never happen.

      • 79
        EU Watch says:

        Or fear.

        The US has invested a lot in the EU. We are but puppet (client) states of the US. Obama has ordered that the UK stays in the EU to to Dave’s face.

        Remember, the EU project was constructed by the US (for that, read the chosen ones in NYC) out of The Marshall Plan after WWII as a bulwark against the statism (national socialism?) of the USSR. Also remember, at the outset of WWII the Russians were aligned to national socialist Germany via the Anti-ComIntern Pact (Anti-COMmunist INTERNational). Stalin believed in socialism-in-one-country, not Bolshevik/Judeo communism. Those that hail from NYC certainly don’t like them national socialists, as they’re terribly bad for business.

        By its very constitution, the EU is anti statist. It places the rights of the individual above the duty to the collective. It forbids the death penalty. It is essentially right-wing libertarian. It protects the rights of those who own businesses with little regulation (cf the banks and the credit crunch). It does, in practice, enable economic anarchy (anarchy means without rule or regulation).

        • 182
          Glyn H says:

          Gosh; that’s a lot of nonsense in one short offering; the EU right wing libertarian? To those not taken in by the publicity it is anti-democratic lefty and authoritarian.

          • EU Watch says:

            Don’t be taken in by the pantomime politics that is played out here and in the EU with the aid of the western presstitute MSM.

            If bankers in China had committed one iota of the predatory frauds and scams that they did here, the whole lot would have been jailed before you coulsdsay “Fred the Shred”.

        • 191
          Four-eyed English Genius says:

          Hardly worth bothering to reply, except to say “Cobblers”!

      • 94
        Oh crap! says:

        “UK exit from EU would be ‘loss/loss scenario’, warns Goldman Sachs” DT today.
        GS pretty much running europe –

        Carney in July, should we be worried, or bloody terrified?

        • 111
          EU Watch says:

          Please refer to comment #78 above.

          I told you the NYC kosher boyz run the show. Think of it as Blankfein “carrying out God’s work”. Yes, he actually said that!

          • yankee doodling says:

            …. and bugger me, isn’t the incoming Secretary to the US Treasury (ie he who signs their banknotes) one of the chosen ones.

            His name is Mr Few.

            His given name is ‘Jacob”, but it really should have been “Chosen”.

    • 12
      Anonymous says:

      There was a clear majority in favour of gay marriage in Parliament, and polls suggest one in the country too. It’s the swivel eyed-loons that are out of step, not the PM.

      • 23
        Japs Eye meet Chocolate Starfish says:

        The majority of the population could not give a tinkers cuss one way or the other, but are rightly pissed that this government allocated time for a folly (not even on any political roadmap) when that time could have been spent on things more on the average Joe’s mind.

        Most people see it as some cynical means to avoid an EU mandated law that would trigger a referendum.

        • 54
          Oliver says:


          • Jimmy says:

            You need to remember that in the guidophile language “most people” is in fact the first person singular pronoun.

          • Burley's bangers says:

            Most people are not homosexual and could not care less about homosexuality one way or another.

            2% of the population are homosexual Then there is probably about 15-20% of people who are opposed to homosexuality. The rest, a majority, or most people, do not care one way or the other about it.

          • Question says:

            Are you suggesting that Ukip aren’t actually spokesmen for the British people and possibly only represent a narrow body of opinion in the conservative movement?

          • Vote LibLabCon for uncontrolled immigration says:

            If… That’s true, you have nothing to fear.

            So get back to running your cosy LibLabCon coalition, and the rest of us will vote UKIP.

        • 87
          Parker says:

          on this basis japs eye, then the country is even MORE sick of all this relentless banging on about Europe and the laughable infighting on the right.

          get on with governing, or fuck off.

          • Oliver says:

            In which case (Burley’s bangers) the backbenches were mad to drag the party backwards in terms of perception.
            Most the electorate weren’t watching until the BB started making a fuss about something the electorate don’t care about.
            Choose your fights.
            HUGE own goal and they’re still banging them in.

        • 171
          Anonymous says:

          If you think about gay marriage, nobody is forcing religions to change their stance, and civil parnershps are really civil marriages. so what is the problem ?

      • 86
        Anonymous says:

        Bollocks – when a poll asked if the law should be changed to redefine marriage 60%+ said no. The problem is that politics and the media have been hijacked by a cozy cabal of cocksucking shit stabbers.

        Bum sex marriage will never be considered true marriage – it’d be like redefining dog to mean cat. The cat will always be a cat and a dog, a dog. Marriage will always be the union of a man and a women no matter how much the gaffia thcweam and thcweam.

        • 113
          Oliver says:

          Sorry but this sort of nonsense from backward buffoons will only drag Labour back in.
          The gay marriage fight was lost before it even started.
          Your figures are meaningless.

          • Anonymous says:

            Oliver my boy, they’re two cheeks of the same arse.

            You cannot think you can redefine words to suit your own narrow pecadilloes whilst at the some time shitting in the faces of your own core supporters, Oaten style and expect there not to be any consequences. We don’t care if Labour get back in – the Tories are no different. get that into your thick skull and you’ll be half way to understanding why there’s no way back for Dave – if your core supporters are against a policy you’re advocating then you’re fucked!

            UKIP offer us answers to problems that you have no intention of solving and if it means that Cameron inherits the mantle of worst PM ever from Heath in the process of us defenestrating him then it’s a win-win.

          • Vote LibLabCon for uncontrolled immigration says:


            Whichever of LibLabCon win, it will mean precious little difference in policy, because 85% of laws are
            ininfluenced one way or another by the EU.

            So each of LibLabCon will support t’other. As they did last night.

            Meanwhile each party will continue to haemorrhage voters and grass routes support until either a crisis of confidence occurs, or UKIP win.

            The old party divisions and fear of Liebor mean nothing now.

            The voters are waking up and joining the dots…..

            We do not fear Liebor, they are only marginally worse than the tories. The bigger prize is beating them all.

        • 122
          Stephanine Anne Lloyd says:

          A day with us honey and we’ll turn you into a blushing bride!

    • 49
      Sir William Waad says:

      Dave, all this could have been avoided if you had treated junior ministers, backbenchers and the party membership with a modicum of respect. Instead, you shut yourself into the Palace, where you created a toy farm with pretend peasants for you to patronise. Now, you are astonished to find the real peasants at the gates. “How can they be so ungrateful, after all I have done for them?” you muse, as you are burnt in effigy.

      • 62
        Call me Dave says:

        Sir William, please never again address me directly.

        In future communication you will go through Passepartout my valet.

        But how dare you accuse me of being out of touch.

    • 115
      GI style and presentation department says:

      truth be known David they’re not .. its the spin thats missing the mark .. more human please …stop tilting to one side or another when you give a major speech..square up to the mic and stay there..have your hair cut shorter but not shaved..get new cutaway collar white shirts made at turnbill and asser and tighten tie knots closer…
      silk ties in colours are not taboo but the pale blues getting a bit jaded

      Get several new deep blue suits made and try double breasted 6 button front 4 button cuff with slightly longer jacket to make you appear slightly slimmer…either that or trim up.

      • 159
        Vote LibLabCon for uncontrolled immigration says:

        Yeah, or he could get a new suit, AND fcuk off back to Notting Hill.

      • 175
        Hertford and Stortford says:

        Sick of his common white shirt, shiny naff solid colour ties, cheap black shoes and the awful suit. Take a leaf of Mandlebum and go to crutch and foreskin in the city. I don’t know who dresses you Dave but you need to sharpen up.

        Start calling yourself David, listen to your shrewd Mother and start behaving like a gent

        One more thing, stop flapping your hands around. You are not Italian and gesticulation makes you look an imbecile.

    • 151
      What a gay day says:

      HOLE – SPADE – DIG – DEEP, and jump in it. The tories are fecked! They are simply out of their boxes. Good enough for them, I could see it coming.

  2. 2
    Lara Finstock says:

    David Cameron is a traitor to the UK and has already sacrificed very nearly everything that was ever of value in this country in return for a bag of beans and the promise of a bloated EU pension for himself.

    To hell with Cameron and all the LibLabCon.

    Vote UKIP.

    • 9
      Jerry Attrick says:

      + a shed load

    • 10
      V1le, vicious Labour ruined my Country says:

      I want to marry my aggressive goldfish but I’m being discriminated against.

      • 118
        Anonymous says:

        Yes because contract law covers goldfish doesn’t it?

        • 124
          Pets at Homo says:

          A contract can cover anything

          • Anonymous says:

            So a goldfish can enter into a contract can it?

          • Pets at Homo says:

            Without being a pedant you said “Yes because contract law covers goldfish doesn’t it”

            Cover a goldfish — yes a contract can cover anything. There was no mention about the goldfish being one of the parties.

            Do keep up

          • Anonymous says:

            You’re not a pedant. You’re a div. Vile and vicious is angry he can’t enter into a contract with a goldfish. You changed the subject.

          • Pets at Homo says:

            Waa, waa, waa get over yourself, I simply corrected your inaccurate assertion.

    • 19
      Anonymous says:

      But they are magic beans.

    • 67
      Oliver says:

      One of the silliest messages from the heart of little Britain I’ve read on here.
      Thank god the closest you’ll come to being in charge is deciding whether it’s beans or spaghetti.

  3. 3
    Raving Loon says:

    People who say voting UKIP is a wasted vote should look at the Tories and tell me a vote for them is not wasted. The Tories are dead as long as Cameron is leader. He’s not even chasing the center ground, just some mad lentil eating, sandal wearing, tree hugging fantasy. UKIP are the real conservative party and people are beginning to realise it.

    • 66
      Swivel eyed Alexsandr fruitcaka says:


      • 70
        Oliver says:

        You boys are opening the waves for Ed M. to stroll straight in.
        Wake up.

        • 80
          Dave 'UKIP Recruiting sergeant' Camermong says:

          Blame the blue Labour leader rather than the proles

        • 137
          True Blue says:

          +1 Oliver

        • 139
          Who Want's Some! says:

          Not the point, the point is undermine the ENTIRE political elite of all three parties. The way the economy is going neither Lab or Con will have much room to do much over 2015-20. The Conservative Party has to be won for conservative policies that is the battle that must happen. Only then with real conservative policies can we cut the spending and get the EU off our backs.

        • 140
          The New Politics says:

          It matters not a jot. Labour and the current Conservative leadership are indistinguishable from each other. But it is amusing to see how the old style politicians and their minions are panicking.

          • Oliver says:

            Hobby politics.
            UKIP is the play thing of Farage and aren’t going anywhere.
            Come the General Election it’s Labour or Conservative (and god forbid Clegg).
            All this new politics bollocks you’re going on about will split the right’s vote.
            Balls and Milliband are keeping out of it and letting the right lose the election.
            THEY DON’T NEED TO WIN – it’s being given to them.

        • 156
          one wheel on my wagon says:

          Just so long as someone with a spine gets in I couldn’t give a toss. I’d vote for Ghengis Khan if only he would get us out of europe and I’m a lifelong labour supporter…

        • 161
          Vote LibLabCon for uncontrolled immigration says:

          It makes no difference..

          We don’t give a shit who wins 2015 cause they all have scuk the EUs c0ck.

          The quicker people vote UKIP and destroy the tories, the quicker we can save this country for
          rich and poor alike.

    • 91
      No way says:

      will anyone vote UKIP in sufficient numbers at the General Election. It will be ‘hold your nose and vote Tory’ across the mainstream media and sites like this and UKIP will be back to polling data like Nick Griffin.

      • 106
        Anonymous says:

        Ha! They polled ~ 3% in the last GE and lost the Tories 30 seats. You’d have to be pretty optimistic to believe they won’t poll more than 6 % in 2015 even allowing for a meltdown of their current polling figures of between 15% and 22%.

        You are therefore a Tory think tank wanker and I claim my £5.

      • 108
        Anonymous says:

        You forgot to add “in your opinion”.

      • 150
        Cameron, yesterday's man says:

        Not a chance in hell of me voting Tory with Cameron in charge.

    • 177
      Anonymous says:

      I cant take nigel seriously ! he doesnt even live in the UK and he has the nerve to tell us what to do whilst gurning for the cameras and clutching a pint.The man is a fool.

      • 186
        Village Idiot says:

        ….But the ideology is correct,the message,not necessarily the messenger,and,
        if their is no alternative,no conservative party,no one batting for Britain,what is a caring ,patriotic voter to do.???

      • 197
        Anonymous says:

        David Camoron is a lying spineless traitor and a complete joke.

        No one in their right mind will ever trust him or vote for him again.

        He hates conservative voters and treats them with utter contempt.

        All he is concerned about is his own power and position, and making sure his eton cronies are looked after.

        The man is a traitor and no one in their right mind will ever vote him.

        The quicker he is removed as leader the better.

      • 199
        Anonymous says:

        He lives in the South East of England, on what map is that “not in the UK”?

  4. 4
    The Church of Cameron says:


  5. 5
    Did I Say That Out Loud!? says:

    Bye-bye lefTory Party!

    • 21
      Tory Party RIP - Killed by Camoron says:


      They are truly utterly f*cked. And 7 months from now, Camoron will hold open the door and invite 29 million Romanians to come and live here.

      Bye bye Conservative Party! Bye bye!

      • 41
        Toodleoo Dave says:

      • 46
        JH32489238490234 says:

        Hello ‘New Conservatism’. Hello 50% in polls.

        Pop, pop, pop go the bumh*les of the Islington Chatterati.

        Blue bumh*les, Red bumh*les, Yellow bumh*les. Pop, pop, pop.

        Pop pop pop at the BBC. How dare the little people not think the way they have been forced to pay to be told to think?

        Pop pop pop – despite their best efforts to make them incapable of such a noise any more.

        I think Labour and their broadcast wing would be making a bit more out of this ‘split’ if it did not bode so very, very badly for them too.

        • 99
          Oliver says:

          Do you jump at shadows?
          I’m sorry to inform you but it appears that you are confusing reality and thoughts swimming around your petit mind.

          • JH32489238490234 says:

            Ironically Oliver (or should it be Oliver!) the bien pensant left have been doing exactly that for years. They gather together, and echo their world view off of each other in order that they may feel well about themselves.

            But they do not talk as the country does.

            People in shops, factories, offices, building sites, homes, pubs, REAL PLACES – to them, you just all sound like shrill, babbling, trendy-script reading weirdos.

          • Cameron, yesterday's man says:

            You obviously live in the same bubble as politicians.

        • 120
          Oliver says:


          - more assumptions aiming at a ‘you’ that exists only in your mind.

      • 178
        Anonymous says:

        There arent even 29 million Romanians in Romania ! another set of false info from ukip !

        • 184
          Airey Belvoir says:

          That’s only because most of them are begging, picking pockets and carting off railway power cables over here, surely?

        • 198
          Anonymous says:

          It’s 29 million Bulgarians + Romainians you utter mong.

          All of whom have the right to come here next year and claim benefits, get free healthcare, send their kids to school, get mobility cars, get housing benefit, etc etc etc. All paid for with our taxs.

          Let’s hope they don’t turn up in your area and rob your house.

  6. 6
    Gary Jones says:

    I blame those “Aggressive Homosexuals” I think they want us to leave Europe.

  7. 11
    nellnewman says:

    +++Laugh++++ garystreeter is wittering on about his fellow tory mp’s ‘banging on about europe’ when he’s doing the self same thing himself!!!

  8. 13
    Nigel Farage says:

    Just how long will it be – considering current polling data – before the Tories are trailing UKIP, thereby letting in a Labour government in 2015.

    And I am being serious – The people of Britain must now consider this possibility.

    • 26
      GrantShappsShutUpPlease says:

      If people don’t want Ed – they have a duty to vote UKIP as the only party able to prevent Labour.

    • 28
      Jon Pierre ace leader of ze French airforce says:

      When you are going down you may as well go down in flames.

      Vote UKIP

      • 97
        Anonymous says:

        Jean ?

      • 100
        Oliver says:

        In other words give up and buy the miracle cure you know doesn’t really work.

        • 105
          Jon Pierre ace leader of ze French airforce says:

          Better than buying a bulllworker when you know the money back guarantee is a lie.

          @96 no it’s Jon – I’m from Merthyr Tydfil

          • Oliver says:

            No, not better just another poor judgement that allows Labour to step out of the flames and back in power.
            Your choice.

          • Jon Pierre ace leader of ze French airforce says:

            Its simple IMO …

            1. Vote Tory & get Labour as Tory have fucked themselves up for the forseeable
            2. Vote Libdem and get sectioned
            3. Vote Labour and get Labour
            4. Vote UKIP and get Labour BUT also send a message to the elite shitstains (and maybe maybe maybe get UKIP)

            You may disagree but this is my rational

          • Jon Pierre ace leader of ze French airforce says:

            1. Vote Tory & get Labour, as Tory aren’t even Tory
            2. Vote Libdem and get sectioned
            3. Vote Labour and get Labour
            4. Vote UKIP and get Labour BUT also send a message to the elite (and maybe maybe maybe get UKIP)

          • Anonymous says:

            Labour and Tories are nothing alike. That’s just Ukip propaganda. You’ll realise when they get in.

          • yankee doodling says:

            Jon!!! You CANNOT use the word that means ‘unpleasant markings’ in any of your posts – that’s why you got auto-binned first time

    • 38
      Raving Loon says:

      I’m waiting for the day when UKIP are getting concerned about the Tories splitting their vote.

      Actually, I think Nigel already mentioned that one.

      All good!

    • 61
      Anonymous says:

      Ed, Nick and Dave represent different branches of the same political elite. The illusion of electoral choice belies the same neo-Marxist agenda. The only real choice is between The LibLabCon Alliance and UKIP.

    • 98
      Real Conservatives vote UKIP says:

      Exactly. All Tory candidates must be persuaded to stand down and not risk splitting the UKIP vote.

    • 162
      Vote LibLabCon for uncontrolled immigration says:

      Can you imagine if the tories perpetuated the Liebor love in they exposed us to last night in a formal coalition in 2015.

      They’d be more of a laughing stock than they
      are now…..

      The New Conservatives would clean up….

  9. 14
    Gary Streeter MP says:

    It’s silly to risk everything to get out of Europe. Just as it was silly to risk everything by fighting Hitler. It would have been much more sensible and safe to have become part of the Third Reich.

    Only swivel-eyed loons would disagree.

    • 89
      Anonymous says:


    • 144
      The New Politics says:

      Oh dear, someone else who doesn’t understand the difference between the continent of nations called Europe, and the dated and now failing political construct that is the EU.

  10. 15
    Penfold says:

    The bickering goes on, as the Tory leadership has lost its way, and has detached itself from the grass roots.
    As many have said, the problem arises as the leadership is too elitist and aloof from the rank and file, and dismissive of the issues that the rank and file find important.
    Call me Dave is a crypto-Europhile, as that’s were the power’s at, and he want’s a piece of the action. That’s the action £m’s like the Kinnock’s acquired courtesy of Brussels.

    • 22
      Bazinga! says:

      Of course, when Cameron loses in 2015 (along with Clegg) they will all head off to Europe or off to some large bank that has connections to the EU.

      Probably firing off CV’s right now.

      All that we know for sure is in 2015 the economy will still be fucked, spending will still be out of control, the public services will still be shit and immigration will be out of control.

    • 102
      Oliver says:

      Leadership has become detatched?
      Seems to me like the rank and file have lost touch with reality on the back of few council seats.
      Get ready for opposition.
      It’s looking like Tories have forgotten how to be in power.
      Happier in fighting.

  11. 16
    S-E Loon says:

    Astigmatism rules (0) (P)

  12. 17
    Joe Bonanno says:

    Unfettered eu immigration and rule by brussels is a good thing because..

    answers to

    Can’t thinkof any myself.

    • 35
      One-term Dave, dragging the Tories to their grave, says:

      By jove! Unfettered EU immigration is super duper spiffing because the EU told me to say it’s super duper spiffing!

      Can I have my super duper spiffing EU pensions now, please?

      Toodle pip!

    • 59
      Sir William Waad says:

      Unfettered immigration makes the rich richer and the poor poorer. Tally-ho!

  13. 18
    Bazinga! says:

    The Tories are totally fucked. The whole thing about Europe could have been settled by ensuring that in every manifesto there would be a promise of a referendum on staying in or getting out.

    Regarding the whole homosexual marriage crap. Fact is most people probably couldn’t give a fuck, but the problem with Cameron is he’s trying to use this as his Tony Blair clause 4 moment, beating up on the supposed extremists in his own party.

    The difference was Blair won three election with huge majorities, Cameron failed to win against a massive jock mong in Brown.

    • 31
      Raving Loon says:

      That was a watershed moment for me. How can you fail to beat a man who was clearly insane, claiming he “saved the world” and ended the business cycle.

      • 47
        Anonymous says:

        Simply because the majority of the people of this country DO NOT want a Tory government. Now that the Tories have demonstrated, with the help of the Liberals, just how venal they can be, it is unlikely they will ever command an overall majority again.

        • 93
          Burley's bangers says:

          Indeed, they are almost as venal as labour were. However they are being nicer to the poorest paid workers. Labour slapped income tax on them at 10% and then a year later doubled their income tax.

          You can imagine what the outcry would be if the tories had doubled the income tax of the poorest workers.

        • 193
          Four-eyed English Genius says:

          They don’t want a Labour one either. Vote UKIP.

      • 62
        I used to vote Tory but now I'd sooner eat my own face says:

        Not only that, but fail to beat a (detested) man who – live on TV – was overheard saying his core voters were bigoted.

        As Bazinga! says, the Tories are now totally f*cked.

    • 173
      Matilda says:

      Can you name just one item in Dave’s manifesto that he has actually carried out?

      Curbing immigration? Nope. Bonfire of Qangos? Nope. Referendum? Nope. Tax simplification? Nope. MPs recall? Nope. Sorting out crooked MPs expense claims? Nope. Etc….

  14. 20
    Chis Bryant says:

    I’m an aggressive homo, my gayer friends call me ruffpuff!

    • 34
      Nigel Evans says:

      Have you seen the Bruce Lee film ‘Fist of Fury’?

      • 88
        Chris Bryant says:

        Seen it, I’m still sitting on the fist. Call me.

      • 143
        Anonymous says:

        No, but I can offer you a Fistful of Dollars in exchange. Failing that the Foot Fist Way if you can stretch to it.

  15. 30
    Lax Clifford says:

    I wonder why Dave isn’t returning any my calls offering help with his PR?

  16. 32
    Anonymous says:

    What’s Streeter ever done other than arse lick ?

    • 43
      fruitcake says:

      All the Devon tories are just sheep who kiss arse and strive to keep their sticky paws on power.

      There, have I crashed enough metaphors together?

      • 174
        Matilda says:

        …. while crossing bridges as they come to them and then changing horses in midstream…

      • 194
        Hertford and Stortford says:

        Not as bad as the Tories at East Herts Council. They’ve run out of people to stand so the Councillors sit on County, District and Town.

        Long overdue Private Eye looked at this Rotten Borough

  17. 33
    Media Guru FibDems says:

    We Fib Dems are in a civil partnership with s-e-loons. Is marriage the next step?

  18. 37
    Moussa Koussa Mark 10 says:

    I think I will stop posting

    The Neo Nut Mad Loons are destotying themselves without any opposition

    • 40
      Moussa Koussa Mark 10 says:

      …on seconds thoughts, I might continue…its such fun !!!!!!!

      • 51
        Moussa Koussa's pet meerkat says:

        I think it’s fantastic. Ed must be pissing himself. Who needs policies with these idiots in power?

        • 84
          Ed Miliband says:

          Yeth, I find I can just chillax and not have any stwethful chats with my sponsor, Len about nathty things like polithies

    • 85
      albacore says:

      Ain’t there a law against destotying?
      Is it summat like Dave’s wed bottying?
      These new perversions and aberrations
      Don’t arf complicate normal relations

  19. 39
    Anonymous says:

    What’s he so worried about gays for – the whole lot would fit into a local supermarket and I many would vote for Dave

  20. 44
    Moussa Koussa Mark 10 says:

    has trevor been nicked yet !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  21. 45
    Souper Man says:

    ” the purists who are prepared to sacrifice all to get Britain out of Europe”
    More like
    “the EUophiles who are prepared to sacrifice all keep Britain IN Europe”

    • 188
      Village Idiot says:

      …In the interest of “fairness”, we have had 40years of EU entanglement,now we should have 40 years disentangled,.

  22. 48
    Ed Green says:

    Last time I looked these people were supposed to represent us not own us – you want my loyalty buddy – offer me something I want – don’t just be a marginally less bad alternative to the godawful jackasses on the opposition benchers.

  23. 53
    One-Term Dave says:

    Just because I am
    - devaluing the currency
    - causing cash savers to lose out to both inflation and currency movements
    - letting ever more immigrants in
    - selling out to the EU
    - promoting a housing bubble
    - promoting a stock market bubble
    - implementing ever higher and more taxes

    is no reason not to vote for me.

  24. 55
    Boris1947 says:

    Does anyone think that Cameron can stay as PM until he looses the General Election? surely he must go soon, but how long?

    • 71
      I used to vote Tory but now I'd sooner eat my own face says:

      I’m expecting a resignation statement at any time. It is just getting worse by the day, he’s a dead duck. If he doesn’t quit by Friday, he’ll be told to go.

  25. 56
    MMM says:

    Anyone who uses the term “Europe” is not making a meaning contribution. Europe is a continent. The EU is a structure for its political integration. The EEA is the “Common Market”, although it includes the free movement of people that most would not naturally associate with Customs Union.

  26. 57
    i don't n eed no doctor says:

    GPs don’t want to be bothered with patients.
    Teachers don’t want to teach anything difficult.
    Policemen don’t want to police.
    Nurses don’t want to do the dirty work.
    That’s part of what is wrong!

    • 64
      Moussa Koussa's pet meerkat says:

      And the Tories have achieved what, exactly?

      • 73
        I used to vote Tory but now I'd sooner eat my own face says:

        The benefits cap of £26K. But even that’s far too high.

        Sweet fuck-all else, though.

      • 74
        i don't n eed no doctor says:

        If the tories had solved the financial crisis in one week, given every person in the UK 20,000 pounds, given everyone free food for a year, paid all of the countries fuel bills, and not taken any tax for a year. YOU WOULD STILL COMPLAIN. YOU HAVE NO LIFE.

        • 131
          Anonymous says:

          A certain type of conservative’s default position is being negative and grumpy a la Farage. Quite different to Thatcher whose message was always one couched in the language of hope and positive thinking.

        • 133
          Matt Kelly says:

          You do need a doctor. If those policies were pursued there would be a fair few complaints.

  27. 68
    i don't n eed no doctor says:

    BBC News trying to implicate global warming as the cause of the latest tornado. Are the numbers of tornados increasing was the question, and apparently it’s down to luck where the tornados strike. Luck? That’s some luck!

    • 92
      Burley's bangers says:

      But the earth has not warmed over the last 15 years. And that is according to the official figures of the climate alarmist monitoring agencies themselves.

      This hurricane killed many people because they choose to live in a part of America which gets hit by hundreds of tornadoes every year. Occasionally a really big tornado hits. This one was the fastest one recorded in history…. BUT that word recorded is interesting, because people hear it and believe that something unprecedented has happened. There have been hundreds of thousands of tornadoes hit that area over the last thousand years, the vast majority of them have not been recorded. There may have been many faster than the one which hit yesterday.

      • 110
        David I-can-look-two-ways-at-once,-both-of-them-stupid Cameron says:

        I’ve just thought of a whizzo place to build more houses for the plebs. There’s loads of empty space on our railway lines with only the very occasional express train whistling through.

        Now, is that leadership or what? What ? What ?

    • 112
      Anonymous says:

      A couple of weeks ago there had been far fewer incidents of tornados than in previous years and they were blaming THAT on climate change! Heads they win, tails you lose. The BBC – never unknowingly bending the facts to suit their agenda.

    • 146
      Dorothy says:

      We had a really big one in 1939. I was caught up in it, but I took my little dog Toto with me.

    • 181
      Peirce Coward (without an 'L') says:

      Very flat, Oklahoma.

  28. 69
    Everyone on the left... says:

    …is hoping the Tories ditch Cam and bring in a right wing wrongun like Redwood or, even better, Gove.

    Go on Tories, you know you want to.

    • 81
      i am looking forward to Leveson Part Two says:

      Gove was all over the place when Ed Balls was his Shadow in Education.

      He is having something of an easy ride these days up against Mr Twigg.

      • 90
        Why did Cameron hand back some of his expenses says:

        I do not trust any of them.

        If it is not about self self self then it is about how can this benefit my family and friends.

        David Cameron and Tony Blair have a lot in common

        • 107
          Oliver says:

          They were the best hope of getting their parties elected?
          Labour thought it was The Party that got elected.
          And the Tories think it was the Membership.
          Foolish on both counts.
          Difference being however is the Conservatives have got a chance to rectify their mistake before getting slung out.

      • 126
        Anonymous says:

        You need to look at Gove’s activities in the 90s. Both Gove and Twigg where attendees at many of the Democratic Left, New Politics Network aka the rump of the Gramscian Communist Party think ins.

    • 82
      Everyone on the Right says:

      We hope you just stick with Ed. Go on. We know you don’t want to. But we hope you will.

    • 116
      Anonymous says:

      Gove – no one more guaranteed to irritate anyone north of Islington than that plum in the mouth, Jock know it all.

      As someone once wrote of his journalism – he’s fine if you’re interested in faintly amusing stories about how to find a pair of the same coloured socks in the dark, at 3am in the morning.

  29. 72
    Bonking Boris from Henley on Thames says:

    The Country is going bankrupt and the Tory Party is obsessed with homosexuality.

    This is all going to end in tears and more taxes and/or inflation.

  30. 95
  31. 96
    My hamster has just bitten Freddie Star says:

    One minute it had something to do with his mortgage payments to Derbyshire Building Society and then it had something to do with Cheshire Building Society.

    I tried to understand what was the mistake or oversight that had been made but could never find it and then Cameron’s letter of explanation was pulled from the Web.

    Needless to say the Building Societies concerned have had to be saved by us all.

  32. 121
    The Prime Mincer. says:

    Luvly jubbly. #Winning.

  33. 130
    Anonymous says:

    Isn’t streeter an sdp reject?

  34. 132
    fendel says:

    Oh, there are rumblings are there?

  35. 136
    Boris1947 says:

    Surely everyone realises, whatever happens now, very few will vote for Cameron.Even if the economy recovers before 2015,Cameron will loose. It is time for him t do the honourable thing and fall on his sword and let the Conservatives find a new leader who can come to some form of arrangement with UKIP, be it formal or informal, before its too late. After all I am sure if they choose the right leader they will find that that is what the electorate want. Ideally making a referendum on the EU a the same time as the election, to save unnneccesary expence, and for a new governent that is prepared to govern in true Tory fashion, for the good of the nation.

    • 148
      Boris says:

      I’m a good Europhile who believes in unrestricted immigration. Do let me have a go, I promise you won’t notice any difference.

  36. 141
    Voice of Reason says:
  37. 142
    Anonymous says:

    Ukip are libdems mk II.

  38. 147
    Uriah Creep. says:

    There is nothing swivel eyed about wanting to get out of Europe. Though, I have to say last week the Tories looked like they were tearing each other apart over Europe. Labour will not even entertain the idea of a referendum & the Tories had ample opportunity to turn on them instead of each other.

  39. 154
    What a gay day says:

    Song for sensible torys, if there is such a creature,

  40. 158
    The Dirty Rat says:

    Is David having a wank?

  41. 160
    Tim Williamson says:

    I think he may be talking about those swivel-eyed loons who are determined to let the British people decide for themselves exactly who shall make the laws, rules and regulations that govern their lives and control their borders.

  42. 189

    Dave is disintegrating the party, can’t make out why, he has enough swivel eyed loony advisors perhaps that’s what they are.
    Can’t see UK (or what is left of it ) coming out of the EU before 2017-20 and then a whacking great bill to pay.
    Nige is a one timer opportunist appealing to the over 55′s. But its the under 40′s who will have to foot the bill for the future and their jobs will be on the line.

    • 195
      Hertford and Stortford says:

      Another who hasn’t done any door knocking.

      The youf I assure you are voting UKIP. Their jobs are being taken by the immigrants and they have nowhere to live other than their parents home.

  43. 200
    John Tandy says:

    Revisiting the John Major era…..

Seen Elsewhere

The Case for Splitting Up CCHQ | ConservativeHome
Why UKIP Should Join a ‘European Union’. | Anna Raccoon
Dave’s Brush With Bed Bugs | Speccie
Farage: No Briton Could Be My Secretary | BBC
Dave and George Can Now Be Seen Together | Ben Brogan
Life in Public Sector Turned Me Into a Tory | Telegraph
We are a Christian Country Whether Left Like It Or Not | Harry Cole
Tory Candidate Selection Delay | Mark Wallace
Dave’s Office Calls Cops on Food Bank Bishop | Indy
Welby’s Gay Marriage Muddle | Kathy Gyngell
How Red UKIP is Stealing Labour’s Ideas | Alex Wickham

Guido-hot-button (1) Guido-hot-button (1)

Francis Elliot reports on No. 10 strategy meetings:

“When discussion veers to subjects that Mr Crosby thinks of concern only to the political and journalistic classes, he treats the offender as a pub bore with a tart request to “pass the beer nuts, mate”.”

Alexrod says:

It’s money innit.

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