May 9th, 2013

Jon Ashworth: the Self-Loathing SpAd

Labour MP Jon Ashworth is all right on over at the Staggers today:

“When David Miliband announced his resignation as MP for South Shields, there was some suspicion that another so-called ‘London special advisor’ would be parachuted into this supposed rock solid northern Labour bastion. Ed Miliband’s One Nation Labour has genuinely made an effort to widen the pool of figures joining the PLP…”

Yes, shame on all these “London special advisers” parachuted into northern seats. Well said that man. That man being a former “London special adviser” (No.10 Deputy Political Secretary) “parachuted into the supposed rock solid northern Labour bastion” of Leicester for the 2011 by-election. Spun like a true Brown SpAd.


  1. 1
    Keith Vaz says:

    No one has parachuted as far as me.

    • 8
      Gruesome says:

      Any grieving 14 year old girls to hug live on TV?

      • 40
        Lord Ferguson says:

        Another millionaire socialist.

        • 42
          Duh says:

          If we pull out of Europe, will Schrodinger’s Cat have to give up his tax exile status, and what will he do for his holidays –

          • lojolondon says:

            This is completely normal for a Liebour MP – take the easy route up, then pull up the ladder after yourself, ensuring no more poor people can excel.
            - Went to Grammar school? OK, lets close them down.
            - Received ‘free’ university education, paid by those who went before you? OK, charge the new generation to go to Uni.
            - Rich dad has mates who got you into politics? OK, say it is not ‘fair’ and ensure that others can’t follow the same route.
            - Worked as an unpaid intern? OK, stop free interns (in theory!)
            - Parachuted into a cushy seat? Stop others, or at least complain when they receive the same leg-up.
            Totally normal Liebour behaviour.

    • 10
      Handy Man says:

      We could arrange for the high pressure output of a sludge pump to reach you – if that would help?

    • 11
      Keith Vaz MP for Leicester East says:

      Born in Aden
      Settled in Twickenham
      Schooled in Hammersmith and Cambridge
      Lives in London

    • 37
      Pandora Spankingham-Wopp says:

      Not strictly true. Cameron and Osborne were Spads for Major – and they have certainly attempted to match the depths of Venal Vaz.

  2. 2
    Stand to attention. Today is Europe Day. says:
  3. 3
    Story? What Story. says:

    Born in Salford.
    Studied in Durham.
    Worked in London.
    Took a job in Leicester.
    Tebbit would be pleased.
    Shame they don’t make Raleigh bikes in Nottingham any more though.

    • 47
      Pandora Spankingham-Wopp says:

      That explains it. Salford – once seen, never forgotten (no matter how hard you try).

  4. 4
    Gordon Brown says:

    I’m watching Pingu.

    • 13
      the world is literal. says:

      menta plus mensa.
      sixsax gets excitement but the danger is glo.bull. as the balls. may go walkies.
      the soldier sticks to the 4.
      do the sweep.
      that is the dare for the mensa.

    • 28
      you couldn't make it up says:

      no your not, your in one of the most beautiful cities in the world Cape Town. Well it was beautiful until you turned up

  5. 5
    The Treacherous Tin Pot Tosser in No 10 says:

    I sometimes feel as though I was parachuted into place!

    Seriously though, – who in their right mind would vote for me???!!!!

  6. 7
    fruitcake says:

    BBC-licking-Labour-butt moment coming…..
    Ed Balls-up is about to be Jeremy Vile’s guest on R2….think I’ll go out for a long lunch.

  7. 12
    Karma says:

    Ha ha!!

    Halal lamb burgers have been removed from schools in Leicester after tests on a sample burger found traces of pork. The city council said DNA tests were carried out on the burgers because of the horsemeat scandal. The sample burger was one of a batch made by a Doncaster-based company in January.

    Halal products are used in 24 schools in Leicester but the burgers have only been supplied to 19 schools. Assistant city mayor Vi Dempster said: “I am appalled by this situation. It is disgraceful that none of us can have confidence in the food we eat.”

    • 15
      the world is literal. says:
      a la la and
      a la
      cum to dada.
      the wimmin r preeti.
      hide the burr….ka.

    • 19
      Scunny cunny says:

      A sample batch of MP’s were found to contain pork DNA.
      “It’s disgraceful when you can’t have confidence in the people you elect” said a voter.

      • 53
        Professor Robert Maurice Lipson Winston, medical doctor, scientist, television presenter, politician says:

        Surely it should be that a sample of MP’s was found to contain no DNA wahtsoever.

        • 70
          Ghost of Marx (Groucho) says:

          Or just some small amounts of Chris Bryant’s?

          Do accept my apology – even I feel sick now……

    • 26
      Pearl Neclesse says:

      It’s their own bloody fault if they choose to eat crap like that….

      One thing…have they found horse DNA in pork chops yet?

    • 27
      Bob Fleming says:

      I want to be confident that I am not eating Halal, lets fix that first

      • 38
        Scunny cunny says:

        Now is the time for the onus to shift on believers in god to prove his existence.
        When they can’t we can stop indulging in this religious practice shit.

        • 48
          Pandora Spankingham-Wopp says:

          Stop and think for a moment. Without religion we would not have the entertainment of Tom Cruise making a prat of himself, most of the televangelists in the US would switch to running Ponzi schemes as the next most lucrative crime and Parker Farage would implode after losing faith in his own existence. Actually that last one has some merit…..

      • 66
        Pearl Neclesse says:

        Eat pork and lobster then…they haven’t been made halal….yet! ;-)

  8. 14
    Penfold says:

    One Nation.
    Special Advisor.
    Rock Solid.

    Well well well, a propagandists delight all those key buzz words.
    Milliblandus minimus must be reading his fathers’ old Marxist revolutionary hand books….

  9. 16
    The Electorate Hate Professional Politicians says:

    Unfit for public office. What more can one say?

  10. 17
    Sarah says:

    Horrible man – smells musty too imo.

    How much longer can the white minority cling to positions of power in Leicester?

  11. 22
    Sir William Waad says:

    Leicester is not in the North.

  12. 23
    Pearl Neclesse says:

    I had thought that only homos were self loathing.

  13. 25
    Owen Jones says:

    My economic literacy is close to zero, but I know the capitalist class needs to pay more.

  14. 29
    Knackered MP says:

    We need more holidays. Working for nearly 3 months every year is really tiring.

    • 51
      not very MP friendly says:

      “Work” – activity involving mental or physical effort done in order to achieve a result.

      Where in that definition does an MP fit?

    • 54
      Pandora Spankingham-Wopp says:

      This idea has merit. The less they work, the less damage they can do. To quote Wellington, ‘I do not know what they do to the enemy but, by God, they frighten me’.

  15. 31
    Tay King-dePisse says:

    “…[W]hile I concede there have been some former political advisors (myself included)…” (Third paragraph.) I’m sure he meant “Yet another one, like me”, making just a little bit of a jest about himself and his ilk. Doesn’t seem to be so self-unaware as you look to make him out to be, Guido.

    Gotta up your game a smidgen, mate. We’re counting on you here. Don’t let us down.

    • 41
      Scunny cunny says:

      However ironic,don’t you think that his ‘do as I say not as I do’ attitude is taking the piss though?

  16. 44
    Private Jon Ashworth Labour parachute regiment says:

    I still haven’t earned my ‘Brown wings’ yet

  17. 45
    Dan Hodges says:

    We were told last week Lynton Crosby worked in both “CCHQ and Downing St”. Today, No 10 spokesman: “Mr Crosby doesn’t work from Downing St”

    • 55
      Moussa Koussa Mark 8 says:

      You mean Lynton Crosby, the foreign national who lives in UK, and uses the NHS

      • 59
        The suffering public queuing up in A&E because the GP services have collapsed says:

        He uses the NHS? He’s not as bright as he’d have us think then.

    • 56
      Pandora Spankingham-Wopp says:

      Not a problem either way. He will be spending the next few weeks being flattened in an Oz courtroom by a Labour politico backed by unlimited party funds.

  18. 52
    Moussa Koussa Mark 8 says:

    Was there a Queens Speech yesterday….no one seems to know, other than the Daily Wankpress

    • 60
      Lord Stansted says:

      I think it had something to do with the death of someone who worked in a football club.

  19. 61
  20. 63

    Spinney Hill.

    Just the place you would expect to find a Spad.

  21. 64
    Southern Poofter says:

    I realise you is Oirish n all Guido but even the most basic Atlas will show you that Leicester is not “Northern”.

  22. 65
    Another of life's losers who voted UKIP says:

    David Cameron attacks Tory ‘pessimists’ who say Britain should leave EU

    Dream on Dave, dream on. We’ll awake you when it’s time to leave.

  23. 69
    Star Knee Gee Pee says:

    take this prescription and fcuk off


Seen Elsewhere

Guardian April Fools Apology | Press Gazette
Jenni Russell and Her Child’s Godfather, Ed Miliband | Breitbart
Labour’s Left and Right are Growing Restive | Staggers
Corrupt, Incompetent UN Has No Right to Lecture Us | Dan Hannan
Mirror’s Lazy Lie | Guardian
Hungary’s Heir to Thatcher | Conservative Woman
Farage and Salmond Both Want Outopia | David Aaronovitch
More Missing UKIP Money | Times
Church Should Fight Evil of Welfare Dependency | Stephen Glover
1 in 16 Pick Up Infections in Filthy NHS Hospitals | Mail
Let’s Get Evangelical | David Cameron

Guido-hot-button (1) Guido-hot-button (1)

Rod Liddle on the loony UN sexism special rapporteur:

“There is more sexism in Britain than in any other country in the world, according to a mad woman who has been sent here by the United Nations.

Rashida Manjoo is a part-time professor of law at Cape Town University in the totally non-sexist country of South Africa (otherwise known as Rape Capital Of The World).

Mrs Magoo has been wandering around with her notebook and is appalled by the sexist “boys’ club” culture here, apparently.

I don’t doubt we still have sexism in the UK. But is it worse than in, say, Saudi Arabia, d’you think, honey-lamb? Or about 175 other countries? Get a grip, you doolally old bat.”

orkneylad says:

What’s he been doing FFS, mining bitcoins?

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