March 22nd, 2013

IDS: Balls Like Mr Potato Head

Is there a competition in the cabinet as to who can come up with the most amusing alter ego for Ed Balls? Vince Cable gave it a good go yesterday noting how Balls reminded him of Basil Fawlty saying “don’t mention the war”, but the clear winner is IDS:

“It was quite amusing to watch the shadow Chancellor run around. More and more he reminds me of the film “Toy Story”, and that rather angry Mr Potato Head who wanders around shouting, screaming and being very angry to absolutely no effect at all. Disaster, chaos, crisis, U-turns—I wonder what he does in his private life when anything goes wrong. He is certainly not much help to his wife I expect.”

Uncanny…


300 Comments

  1. 1
    What a plonker. says:

    Ed Balls . Gods gift to the Tory party .

    Like

  2. 2
    Ed Ballzup says:

    so what?

    Like

  3. 3
    anon says:

    Dick head more like

    Like

  4. 4
    National Socialist Workers Party says:

    He looks better in uniform

    Like

  5. 5
    Ed Balls says:

    I am actually a potato millionaire. I make a hundred potatoes a day in interest alone

    Like

  6. 6
    MeinBeast says:

    He probably wears Lederhosen at home and knee length socks

    Like

  7. 8
    MeinBeast says:

    Alf Garnett without the sense

    Like

  8. 9
    Yvette Potato Ed says:

    I haven’t been there for years. Still, Steph and Ellie are happy to climb the greasy pole.

    Like

  9. 10
    Anonymous says:

    Balls always reminds me of Adolf Hitler, he has those crazy eyes & the habit of shouting the same things endlessly in an unhinged way. Just put a littel mustache on his upper lip & voila Adolf!

    Like

  10. 12
    Casual Observer says:

    Check a little after, and in Hansard when published, for IDS’ on the money remark about Ed Balls (and Brown…) economic policy:

    On Borrowing: To infinity and beyond.

    Classic.

    Like

  11. 13
    The Old Fella says:

    the film “Toy Story”, so that is what IDS (the quiet man) does in his spare time

    Like

  12. 15
    MeinBeast says:

    Dont be stupid be a smarty come on and join the Labour party

    Like

  13. 17
    Curly Howard says:

    Oh, ya wanna be a wise guy, leaving ME out?

    Like

  14. 18
    Tony Blair says:

    Balls is useless, why, I even had to father his children as Yvette said he couldn’t get a hard on.

    Like

  15. 19
    The final solution says:

    Balls should be made to eat a bucket of cement.

    Like

  16. 20
    Another week wasted arsing around with stupid old bags, thick students and scrounging, Labour voting dogshite in Edinburgh. says:

    He is certainly
    not much help to his
    wife I expect.”

    And of no use to the country.

    Like

    • 44
      Balls up says:

      Hopefully in 2015, Balls’s tiny majority of only 1,101 (2.3%) will disappear in that lovely constituency of Morley and Outwood.
      Then he should do his favourite thing and ‘borrow ‘a well-known phrase and ‘spend more time with his family’ before he cripples this country’s finances.

      Like

      • 119
        The Old Fella says:

        Geedo why don’t you stand for that constituency for the Cons, go on Geedo you know want to join the little darlings, that nice salary and lovely expenses you willbe like pig in muck lad. There is a large Iorish club in Leeds, York Road (at least there was when I lived in Leeds), so you will feel at home there, you have to start somewhere and to run against Balls it’s a gift.

        Like

      • 249
        The late great Terence says:

        1200 of those votes came by post…

        Like

        • 290
          Postal Votes are Labour Loo Paper says:

          QED my posting name. If ever there was bigger fraud… How do these fuckers get away with it.

          Like

  17. 21
    Ed "Fat Lining" GoeBalls says:

    Tell a lie often enough and people will believe it.

    Like

    • 33
      Geordieboy says:

      Like Bedroom Tax for example.

      Like

      • 39
        Frank's Son says:

        Or Camerom’s ‘cast iron guarantee!’ Or Gideon’s vow not to raise VAT.

        Like

        • 124
          The Old Fella says:

          I am afraid both of those have shot their bolt, maybe that’s their plan say one thing, and then do exactly the opposite.

          Like

    • 49
      David Cameron says:

      I’ll cut the deficit, not the NHS

      Like

      • 88
        I Remember You Hoo says:

        The National Death Service should have been the first one to axe. And axing it would have saved billions, many lives and untold suffering at it’s murderous unclean hands.

        Liverpool Death Gateway anyone?

        Like

      • 92
        Andy Burnham says:

        Don’t mention the NHS.

        Or Stafford.

        Or Furness General Hospital…

        Like

        • 148
          End impunity in British Politics says:

          Why aren’t you under arrest yet?

          Like

          • Blowing Whistles says:

            Yeah to right – Sarky lost immunity from prosecution when he was booted out and they’re after him now … for taking some old lady’s big bucks to finance his election. [there's an erection joke in there somewhere / Carla 'n all that]

            Like

      • 125
        The Old Fella says:

        That means, I’ll ramp up the deficit, and decimate the NHS

        Like

  18. 24
    Spank Sinatra says:

    Doubt if he has it in him to lift potatoes for eight hours a day. Come to think of it, has he ever done a ‘common job’ in his life?

    Like

  19. 25
    One of the revolting plebs voting for the NEW Government UKIP.Org says:

    Don’t mention

    Balls blinking………

    always so frantically…….

    just like Saddam !!…..

    but he’s been executed !!…….

    I wonder will history be………..hhhhmmmmmm

    Like

  20. 26
    the savant 10.4 highway patrol says:

    Moddy i am amazed stupefied and (nearly) lost for words that you should have seen fit to allow comment 18.

    Please do not even think of modding me ever again .

    I have never sunk that low in relation to “Coops” — and neither I suspect has the Spherical One .

    Like

    • 31
      Errrr..... says:

      Moddy – never mod comments like 18. The mix of serious and humorous is what makes this site so good :-)

      Like

      • 98
        Andrew Bonar Law PM says:

        Why, if people couldn’t make sport of my name, in relation to the capability of Ed “Balls” to “discharge” his husbandly duty (if you will), where have we “come” to as a society? “Stiff” upper lip, old chaps and chapesses! There’s a “vas deferens” between good-natured fooling around and “abuse,” (even of the “self-” kind), “wood”-n’t you say? Show some “spunk”! (Not meaning to “blow” my own “horn,” you understand!)

        Just thought I’d “toss” that one out there.

        Like

  21. 28
    Popeye says:

    How very apt, go to the top of the class IDS.

    Like

  22. 30
    JR Bearbull says:

    I’ve always thought of him as more like Roderick Spode from P.G. Wodehouse’s Jeeves novels – utter stupidity combined with a persistant undercurrent of aggression. I cannot wait until his elevation to the other place as Lord Sidcup.

    Like

  23. 32
    Geordieboy says:

    Who called the shadow chancellor a C**T?
    Better still, who called the C**T a shadow chancellor?

    Like

  24. 37
    M102 says:

    …and who made a c’unt the chancellor?

    Like

  25. 40
    Anoneumouse says:

    Perhaps we should start calling him ‘SPUD’

    Like

    • 246
      John Bellingham says:

      Mr. Nonsense

      Color: Yellow
      shape: Round
      Friends: Mr. Silly
      Rivals: Dianne Abbot (Mrs Gross)
      Gender : Male
      Love: Not even his wife
      Relatives : Mr. Silly, Mr. Funny and Little Miss Giggles
      Family: Mr. Impossible(Adopted brother)
      Release date: 1978
      Job: Talking Nonsense and being silly

      Like

  26. 42
    Spud says:

    I resent that remark. He is insult to all spuds.

    Like

  27. 43
    A BBC Weather presenter says:

    Balls is so embarrassed by his name that he going to change by deed poll to something that reflects his champagne-socialist beliefs. Apparently, he is to be known henceforth as Whattock Hunt.

    Like

  28. 45
    Hoyle should be speaker says:

    Like

    • 132
      The Old Fella says:

      Sounds like a northern lad

      Like

      • 146
        Beeelly Hague says:

        Can he drink 14 pints?

        Like

        • 276
          The Old Fella says:

          I have no idea but you got wasted on 14 gills fell asleep when you came to there were 14 pint bottles around you, you asked had drunk all those pints and the fellas said it was you. Think on Beeelly where on earth could you put 14 pints the size you were!

          Like

      • 252
        Fan E Bygaslight says:

        And, unlike the present incumbent, he was impartial and equally ruthless with both sets of noisy idiots.

        Like

        • 277
          The Old Fella says:

          There must be so many farties in that house of commons why don’t they compulsorily had to stick a pipe up their backsides and all the flatulence used to power the house of commons heating system

          Like

  29. 46
    Universal Hiss says:

    This must be the first time ever that George Smith is right.

    A bit casting stones in greenhouses though.

    Like

  30. 47
    The punishment fits says:

    Balls deserves to have his head kicked in repeatedly with a studded boot, followed by having a rusty iron bar lined with rat poison and razors smashed into his face.

    Harsh but fair.

    DISCLAIMER: THE ABOVE IS PURELY FOR ENTERTAINMENT PURPOSES ONLY AND DOES NOT IN ANY WAY SUPPORT, ENCOURAGE OR CONDONE VIOLENT BEHAVIOUR OF ANY SORT TOWARDS ANYONE ON THIS PLANET AND THROUGHOUT THE UNIVERSE NOW AND UNTIL THE END OF TIME.
    (Disclaimer drawn up by Carter Fuck).

    Like

    • 64
      Brian Leveson says:

      You see..this is what I wasn’t talking about and not legislating for.
      Mindless verbal violence and cyber bullying. Its got to not be stopped by someone else, but not me, as I only do inky print media, and I’m not much good at that.

      Like

      • 164
        Blowing Whistles says:

        Your not much good at bluffing through Pre-prepared judgments either you fat arrogant bastard.

        Like

        • 254
          Fan E Bygaslight says:

          … who really really doesn’t need any instruction on free speech. really really….

          Like

  31. 51
    P l e b says:

    “Fitch says UK downgrade more likely”

    Osborne surely has to go, and go now

    Like

  32. 52
    Climb every mountain says:

    Now the weather has taken a turn for the worse, I will climb a mountain, cause alarm and get all the emergency services out trying to rescue me.

    Like

    • 54
      rebekah aka nellnewman says:

      Talking of the weather whatever happened to global warming?!!!

      I thought when edmilitwit was Environment Minister for gordon he decreed that we would never suffer from snow or cold weather again. My garden was going to turn into a desert and only grow cacti and local rivers were going to dry up.

      Like

      • 73
        B'Ed wettter says:

        But you have. Gosh..I’m parched..anyone got any bottled water..I’m gasping in this unseasonal tropical heat..

        Like

    • 70
      Global Warming Spreading says:

      Like

      • 100
        Vince Cable says:

        I blame global warming.

        Like

        • 291
          Geordieboy says:

          No such thing as Global Warming. They changed it to Climate Change so they can still fuck us with green taxes,

          Like

      • 138
        The Old Fella says:

        Schools closed, when I were a lad I cannot remember having days off school because of snow, ok we sometimes got let out earlier but whole days I live on the justabove the 53 parallel

        Like

    • 101
      The Climate Change Lobby says:

      We rebranded “Global Warming” as “Climate Change” when reality failed to live up to our scare-mongering predictions.

      We are now rebranding “Climate Change” as “Climate Disruption” so that we can claim any odd or unusual weather is a result of Global Warming.

      Remember, if we admitted we were wrong, we wouldn’t get our funding and six-figure salaries.

      Like

      • 168
        Blowing Whistles says:

        DONT’ MESS WITH MOTHER NATURE – She will come up behind you and bite yer tax rusing Rses off.

        We are led by Turkeys who would vote for Christmas – if they thought they could make a buckload of dosh out of it.

        Politicians make donkeys look positively intelligent and pigs at a trough beautiful.

        Like

  33. 53
    rebekah aka nellnewman says:

    When I hear bullyballs mentioned or see him on the screen – my first three thoughts are :

    1) this man persuaded gormlessgordon to sell our gold at brown bottom by giving prior notice to the market that they were going to sell (brainless) and

    2) this man trashed our education system (clueless) and

    3) this was one of spiteful brown’s stab-in-the-back bullyboys (charmless)

    Like

    • 57
      (I don't need no doctor) says:

      Do your thoughts not include – why is Balls a liar and in denial?

      Like

      • 79
        M102 says:

        It’s the way him and Militwat sit laughing in PMQ’s when they’re reminded about the mess that they left the country in and how people are suffering as a result that pisses me off.

        Like

        • 211
          Anonymous says:

          To be serious, have Labour really got nobody better than Milliband and Balls to be leader and shadow chancellor ? i mean its a disgrace isnt it ?

          Like

          • Fan E Bygaslight says:

            Probably not. Just watch a few of them chunter on on the Beeb and you’ll get a flavour of just how thick and useless they all are.

            Like

    • 170
      Blowing Whistles says:

      Nell – don’t forget the hidden hand of Goldma.man Suc.ks’ advice.

      Like

  34. 55
    (I don't need no doctor) says:

    Could any labour MP explain how the “bedroom tax” is collected by HMRC. If they can’t explain, then why do labour persist in yet another lie.
    Why doesn’t a tory MP ask this question in the HOC?

    Like

    • 58
      rebekah aka nellnewman says:

      Surely the question has to be why does the incompetent shadow chancellor believe a cut in benefits is a tax?

      Couldn’t labour find someone more economically competent as shadow chancellor?

      He’s not exactly going to convince the voters that he’s fit to be in charge of our money is he?!!

      Like

    • 62
      anon y mouse says:

      It’s a great PR stunt and it’s working, the braindead understand the word tax, they don’t understand a change in benefits until it happens then they will understand the difference.

      Like

      • 270
        Cockroach exterminator says:

        Every word that oozes its way out of a Liebor politician’s mouth is the result of the party’s ideologies being part of a pyramid of lies.

        Like

    • 203
      Hugh Nose says:

      Mind you , on a similar note, Gideon did call Employers’ National Insurance “Employment Tax” during his Budget speech.

      Like

  35. 56

    Woody – Ed Miliband
    Buzz – Ed Balls
    Jessie – Yvette Cooper
    Ken – Chris Bryant
    Barbie – Jack Dromey
    Hamm – Tom Watson
    Rex – Emily Thornberry
    Stinky Pete – Gordon Brown

    Like

  36. 59

    During this cold weather we seem to be a little short of natural gas.
    So can everyone please go outside and blow into their windmills or shine a torch onto their solar roof panels to help.
    Alternatively, please turn off all lighting and heating and wrap yourself in that tinfoil stuff they use for train crash victims and stay in bed until May.

    Thank you in advance for helping save the planet from global warming during this cold snap.
    yours,

    Caroline Looney
    Greens and veg party

    Like

    • 65
      Brighton Eco-loon Hippy Mong says:

      Right you are man…

      Like

    • 69
      Global Warming says:

      Like

      • 74
        No steps forward 100 steps back says:

        Don’t need and aerial view , I just need to look out of the window, it hasn’t stopped all day.

        Like

        • 82
          Green party says:

          With all the white snow on the ground this will reflect the sun’s rays and cause an ice age. The earth is about to freeze over …UNLESS you recycle your old magazines by title, date and paper thickness and place them in an appropriate container.

          Like

          • I Remember You Hoo says:

            Most of what is collected for recycling goes to landfill anyway, as it’s commercially unviable.

            The market is saturated with low grade crap. Twenty years ago paper processing companies, would pay you for recyled paper, now they charge for collecting it.

            Yet another example of government meddling in markets by diktat and effectively destroying them.

            Like

        • 90
          Universal Hiss says:

          Couldn’t get out of the village today.

          Not much snow but farmers have grubbed out hedges to plant wind mills. This has the unfortunate consequence of snow drifts after an inch of snow blowing off fields onto roads, blocking roads & bugger all in electricity generation.

          So,many people not going to work,loss to the economy but although the wind turbines are not working they are still pulling in a subsidy.

          It’s all fucked up.

          Like

          • Blowing Whistles says:

            Ed – done it for Labour’s lost cause to travellers in 2008. Now didn’t the diktat come from his marxist fiends at the EU and subsequently from them marxist’s pulling al goros strings in the land of the let’s dream up another ruse to tax the public?

            Like

          • Anonymous says:

            is it true that there are no statements that cannot be bought with money?
            the most significant of all statements is the legal statement given to the solicitor…someone who solicits.

            possible exception could be when one’s demons come into play..but then that is more individual than corporate or institutional.

            Like

          • no. 6 says:

            Couldn’t get out of the village today.

            
            

            I used to have that trouble too.

            Like

        • 129
          Fishy says:

          Don’t need and aerial view , I just need to look out of the window, it hasn’t stopped all day.

          Thatcher’s fault

          Like

          • The BBC Endangered Wildlife Documentary Department says:

            The trouble is, not enough politicians went diving in the Maldives when they were in power and Salford is now threatened with snow and hail. Luxury bed and breakfasts in the hills in Bangladesh will soon share a similar fate to the polar bear.

            Anyone want to come to Brazil to film the last pubic lice living on Copacabana beach?

            Like

    • 142
      The Old Fella says:

      I remember trying to work in an office during the winter of 1973, heating only 3 days of the week (electric heating) it was a joy, not.

      Like

      • 257
        Extremely Ancient Seafarer says:

        Ah, the winter of the malcontent and unburied dead’uns. Them was the days my fren.

        Like

  37. 63
    Anonymous says:

    The quality of your blog is diminished by this sort of nonsense, Guido.
    Get a grip.
    Tony

    Like

  38. 66
    BREAKING WIND says:

    Now Fitch has placed the UK on ‘rating watch negative’.

    Like

  39. 71
    Incapable Vince, deputy Chief Cockroach says:

    Gissa job, I can do that..

    Like

  40. 80
    Fuck the LibLabCon says:

    Stay tuned, this could be the linchpin. :)

    http://tinyurl.com/d49pu7f

    Like

  41. 86
    BEN E FIT says:

    Fitch have placed Britain on a downgrade warning after reduced growth levels

    Triple dip here we come

    Like

  42. 93
    athelstan says:

    so er that makes Cameron Buzz lightyear, and Clegg Woody right?

    Like

  43. 97
    Ed Balls - Shallow Chancer says:

    Like

  44. 104
    Chris The Leatherman says:

    IDS has it absolutely right what about poor Yvette, her life must be a misery with Ed Balls but don’t worry they don’t share a house, at least not according to their expense claims when they both claimed for 2nd houses at alternate addresses.

    Like

  45. 106
    DAVE big talk , even bigger cuts CAMERON says:

    I say i’ve just found another great way to impress my rich friends
    there are these football fellows from West Hammersmith which i think is a poverty stricken area of London
    Anyway these chaps who are all frightfully rich wondered if i could waste 60 million of the taxpayers money on that old abandoned stadium , left over from the olympics
    i said , i say this is a great idea similar to those of George lets make rich people richer at the expense of the poor , a great investment for our childrens future employment prospects what
    toodle pip !

    Like

  46. 109
    Yogi says:

    Balls and Brown were on their high horses as soon as anybody questioned their economic policy when they were in power.
    In opposition they have done nothing but talk the economy down, no wonder we have a low level of confidence. Mad mad TRAITORS, please change the music.

    Like

    • 226
      Blowing Whistles says:

      And the msm at the time – yes your lot rupee and t’others – just told the public lies, lies and more lies – innit?

      Like

  47. 110
    Operation Crossbow says:

    Steph Flanders would call him a former lover

    Like

  48. 111
    My 6-year-old cousin says:

    I like pretty flowers
    And I like to make a snowman when it snows
    With a carrot for his nose he he!
    My mummy says Santa Claus is nice
    And I like rainbows
    I think Balls is a fucking cock sucker

    Like

    • 195
      DAVE big talk , even bigger cuts CAMERON says:

      Labour are red
      Tories are blue
      Vince smells of piss
      and Ed Balls of Poo

      Like

      • 231
        Anonymous says:

        There are some mighty intellects in your camp, Guido.

        Like

      • 239
        Max Miller, cheeky chappy, says:

        “When roses are red,
        They’re ripe for the plucking;
        When girls are sixteen,
        They’re ripe for the…”

        Ooooh, you filthy-minded people!
        People like you give me a bad name!

        Like

  49. 112
    Fuck it says:

    I have no sympathy for Cyprus. When will these countries realise it’s the Euro that is killing them along with the Nazi jackboot of the Krauts?

    The Krauts are slowly taking over Europe little by little and no one seems to have the balls to cut the tie and tell the truth.

    Why didn’t we nuke the Krauts at the end of WW2?

    Like

    • 113
      Herman van Rumpboy says:

      The Fourth Reich is almost upon us :)

      Like

    • 154
      Point of Information says:

      Important questions, some answers:

      i) The other countries in the EU do realize Germany is a bit 4th reichy, but at present everyone is spinning off to their pre-revolutionary states. Germany at present appears to be the most sane, and itself is not causing the problems 100%. It is the EU that is at fault, and some external agents (lack of US).

      ii) The euro is causing the economic problems. When the euro group should just print and get on with it, they are doing something dumb: Trying to coerce fiscal union. It works the other way round.

      iii) Trinity test was completed successfully June 16 1945. Germany unconditionally surrendered 8th May 1945 (V-E day).

      If Germany had not surrendered and were still fighting strong (eg. Had invaded Russia in the middle of winter previously…) then they probably would have been nuked.

      They did not get nuked as they had surrendered before the bomb was functional.

      Like

      • 157
        damned impertinent questions says:

        If we stopped Daytime TV would they go to work?

        Like

      • 185
        Blowing Whistles says:

        Follow the moneytrail – who has profitted most since WW2 – who controlled all sides? wake up ffs.

        Like

      • 206
        Anonymous says:

        beng nuked.
        the non japanese super dry brand is kinda everywhere.
        is it telling us something about the state of jap.

        Like

      • 228
        Blowing Whistles says:

        Oh ffs – it wasn’t nukes at that time you dim-wits – it was an Atomic booomb – Nukes are a completely different kettle of fish. Nukes are the end game for all of us. WAKE UP FFS.

        The Irish and Welsh have secretly acquired Nukes – a bloke in cornwall has acquired a Nuke … when you have the NUKE – what exactly do you have – SWA.

        Like

        • 229
          Blowing Whistles says:

          Sweet F all (SFA) actually. I posted it with fucking anger at some of you fucking dim-wits originally.

          Like

  50. 115
    Fat benefits layabout with massive saggy floppies says:

    You pay for my cider and cigarettes.

    Like

  51. 116
    CCHQ Press Officer says:

    Labour are at it again, they have only gone and Bankrupted Cyprus, and nothing at all to do with the Banks.

    Like

  52. 120
    Axe The Telly Tax & Religion says:

    Time we rounded up all the god botherers,ecoloons,fat chavs along with every copy of the Kyoto treaty and use them to fuel the furnaces at the power stations.

    There’s enough of these parasitical bastards to keep us powered for decades and as a bonus we get rid of all the useless fuckers dragging the economy down.

    It’s a win win situation :-)

    Like

  53. 122
    In Deep Shit (I.D.S.) says:

    You all liked my joke did you? Hands up who thinks I should be back as leader?

    Like

  54. 123
    CCHQ says:

    Is Marx’s tomb a communist plot?

    Like

  55. 126
    Owen Jones says:

    Me and my boyfriend had sex in my car tonight, it was pretty uncomfortable.

    I wish we’d dropped my parents off first

    Like

    • 129
      Owen's Mum says:

      Owen! I really wish you would keep this sort of thing to yourself. Now, I’ve had a word with your headmaster and he’s agreed not to suspend you provided you knuckle down and get on with your studies. I know your Media Studies teacher is keen to help and he has even offered to give you lifts home. It’s really important you get your two Cs so that you can take up that place in Women’s Studies at Bournemouth Poly!

      Like

  56. 127
    John Prescott says:

    Ive congratulatations to Ed (Balls not Special Needs) for this sense of humouring but I don’t think he looks like a potato at all he looks more like cauliflower to me or maybe a cabbage like Helmut Kohl or perhaps a beetroot that’s making me hungry no definitely a cabbage and thats the way Ed (Balls) wants to be seen as a cabbage because its important to be down-to-earth and understand the real people even if they are common as muck like me theres always brass where theres dirt is what I say and that’s why I am in the EU as raconteur for Climate Change and the Environment trying to change the climate and make its less hot but in the end the people will decide its just a gravy boat sponsored by Bisto with an extra cabbage and a few hot tatties so shut up you suthern jessies!

    Like

    • 187
      Blowing Whistles says:

      surely this has been repeated on another blog?

      Isn’t it time that John Lardarse returned to the sea – preferable 5 FAThoms deep?

      Like

      • 259
        Extremely Ancient Seafarer says:

        If he boards a boat, it will invariably list to port – and eventually capsize as none has yet been built to stand such weight.

        Like

        • 274
          Q Narde, Southampton says:

          We kindly request that Lord Lardarse pass the port.

          
          

          We really don’t want bar-stewards like him blocking the sea-lanes.

          Like

  57. 134
    Great Policy Failures of Our Time says:

    Like

  58. 135
    Fishy says:

    Interesting body language, from Mr Testiclodes when he is being ripped a new one I the commons. He never looks up or laughs…sites there shuffling his papers, or handing them out to others and (mostly) gets to work on his Blackberry (seemingly disinterested to what is going on). Not only did he learn a great deal from the Great Imbecile, he was obviously infected by some nasty psychological contagion too.

    Like

    • 141
      Slugmund Freud says:

      He’s a psychopath. Understand what that means and you will understand everything.

      Like

    • 189
      Blowing Whistles says:

      He should be sent for a psychiatric assessment by FTAC – they’re known to do Labours checking up on people having been bunged lots of dosh by them – what ho?

      Like

  59. 137
    Anonymous says:

    Mrs Balls should be very proud of her little Eddie.

    Like

  60. 145
    Ed Balls - Shallow Chancer says:

    I’ve got Cable’s Condition; I can’t remember people

    Like

    • 171
      Casual Observer says:

      Sedentary position = couch potato ? IDS slow burner… ;-)

      Like

      • 232
        Anonymous says:

        I don’t understand the IDS thing. He was such a crap leader, the Tories wouldn’t let him fight an election, preferring to replace him with a has-been the country couldn’t connect with, but now they laud him as though he were a genius. Anyone remember News night’s expose of the lies on his CV?

        Like

  61. 149
  62. 150
    sick of em says:

    IDS is a nazi c’unt

    Like

  63. 155
    damned impertinent questions says:

    Is Mr Potato Head full of shit too?

    Like

  64. 159
    Owen Jones says:

    UK economy downgrade on the way…..Negative Watch

    Guido Fawkes said: “This is yet another blow to a downgraded Chancellor who made keeping the confidence of the credit rating agencies the number one test of his economic policy. What really matters are the economic realities which Fitch are responding to including, as their statement says, ‘the persistently weak performance of UK growth’.

    “George Osborne’s plan has catastrophically failed on growth, living standards and the deficit. But instead of a change of direction and action to kickstart the flatlining economy all we got this week was more of the same failing policies. That’s why this more of the same Budget will be remembered as a wasted chance to change course before it was too late.”

    Like

    • 167

      Tell us again how Ed Balls has promised to spend much, much more without borrowing any money or spooking the lenders ?

      Like

    • 175
      Point of Information says:

      Owen, what have you done to help improve the UK credit rating ?

      Like

      • 260
        Extremely Ancient Seafarer says:

        Probably spent this week’s pocket money on boosting the profits of the local ice cream shop (on his way home from school).

        Like

  65. 162
    Peter Bone MP says:

    LIVE ODDS: To score next for England: Emile Heskey 3/1 – Roy Hodgson 5/1 – Joe Hart 10/1 – Rio Ferdinand 20/1 – Fernando Torres 120/1.

    Like

  66. 169
    Childishtorynames says:

    So tat is the conservative bid for a majority. Names. Nerr nerrny nerr nerrr! Old etonian wankers. Good luck in opposition for 13 years. Again.

    Like

  67. 177
    Lateral Thought says:

    Adds a whole new dimension to cripsy pants Bryant.

    Like

  68. 180
    pee says:

    has anybody else noticed that since the toryboy led coalition of bastard opportunists has been in government the weather has been SHIT

    Like

    • 194
      Whether or not weather says:

      Remember when Broon asked his tame meteorologist boss for the weather during the year that pres Omaha came to Britain and was told it wash going to be an Indian summer, it pissed down and everywhere was flooded so no change, it’s due to global warming ask the BBC

      Like

  69. 183
    Denis MacShameless says:

    LABOUR – UTTERLY SHAMELESS, JOBLESS, CLUELESS

    Like

    • 192
      DAVE big talk , even bigger cuts CAMERON says:

      Sell your collection of tax payer funded laptops that would also do the trick
      Thieving twat !

      Like

    • 202
      A Sceptical Public says:

      Has Denis McShane ever taken a bribe?

      Like

      • 215
        JadedJean says:

        More importantly…has Denis McShane ever changed his name?

        Why is his brother’s surname Matyjaszek?

        Why would he be compelled to change his name?

        Why has he served on the Policy Council of Labour Friends of Israel?

        Like

        • 220
          All bow to the ant-semitism alter says:

          He was chair of the inquiry panel of the All-Party Parliamentary Group against Anti-Semitism, which reported in September 2006. Other members included Iain Duncan-Smith and Chris Huhne. In March 2009, he became chairman of a think-tank on anti-Semitism, the European Institute for the Study of Contemporary Antisemitism.[23] He was an advisory board member of the now defunct Just Journalism,[1] a pro-Israeli media advocacy group [2], which presented itself as a neutral voice monitoring reports about Israel in the UK media. Just Journalism was closely associated with the pro-Israeli Henry Jackson Society (HJS), sharing an office with it. When Just Journalism was forced to close in September 2011, citing lack of funds, Robin Shepherd, international affairs director of HJS and a member of Just Journalism’s advisory board, said: “This is a great pity and the cause of Israel in Britain will be the poorer for it”.[3]

          On 8 September 2009, MacShane organised the first of a series of secret meetings between Liam Fox, Adam Werritty, Matthew Gould, Britain’s Ambassador to Israel, and in some cases MacShane himself and members of Mossad, with the intention of enlisting British support for an Israeli attack on Iran.

          http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Denis_MacShane

          Like

          • Blowing Whistles says:

            Some of those bastards made sure I was on holiday at that time – how fucking interesting is that. Thanks for the info by the way.

            Like

  70. 184
    Cato Street Conspirator says:

    ‘… the clear winner is IDS…’

    The clear winner as an effing twat and a liar. The man the Tories dropped as leader because he was such an embarrassing idiot.

    Like

  71. 191
    Cooper 'n' Balls = Fish 'n' Chips : Economic policy explained says:

    Like

  72. 204
  73. 212
    Herman van Rumpboy says:

    Zypriots !! Come out viz your hands UP !!

    Like

    • 216
      Someone sensible says:

      They need to default and replace the euro with pounds.

      Like

      • 222
        Whether or not weather says:

        It seems like a standoff, who can keep their eyes open the longest becomes the winner, EU or Cyprus, both have a problem.

        Like

        • 227
          Herman van Rumpboy says:

          If you vont take ze bailout loan, zen ze house of cards starts to wobble TAKE ZE FUCKING LOAN, ARSCHLOCH !!!

          Like

  74. 213
    Great Policy Failures of Our Time says:

    Like

  75. 218
    Your Friendly Neighbourhood Moral Hazard/Perverse Incentives Analysis Service says:

    Anyone need a good clear succinct explanation of why getting the Government involved in lending for housing ends in grief?
    http://fff.org/explore-freedom/article/clintons-legacy-part-1-the-financial-and-housing-meltdown/
    The Housing Secretary being talked about, Andrew Cuomo, is the current Governor of New York, and his name has been bandied about as a Presidential candidate. We believe he has no real competition in the “Moe the Bartender Lookalike Contest,” in any event:
    http://www.theblogmocracy.com/wp-content/uploads/AndrewCuomo_1_.jpg

    Like

  76. 224
    Childishtorynames says:

    Surely after the recent downgrade the only option is for labour to call for osborne to stay in post come what may

    Like

  77. 234

    God is not on the side of the big battalions, but on the side of those who shoot best. Voltaire

    Like

    • 235
      Tachybaptus says:

      And, while we’re on the subject of Voltaire,

      Opinions have caused more evils on this little globe than the plague or earthquakes.

      (Which is an opinion, but never mind.)

      Like

  78. 236
    Guido Fawkes says:

    Some guy just sat down by us and his jeans are 18 inches below his waist. What a complete joke. He thinks he looks cool. Looks stupid.

    Like

  79. 240
    Jimmy says:

    It’s this sort of incisive and inspiring contribution that had us on the ropes in the early noughties. Thank heaven Ed doesn’t have to face him at PMQs is all I can say.

    Like

  80. 241
    Blowing Whistles says:

    Won’t it be interesting to see how many truths and facts the Sunday newspapers tell us all – the predominantly quoted press that is – ‘The Sunday Times’, ‘The Observer’ and ‘The Sunday Telegraph’ … can’t wait …

    Don’t you just love them papers who protect and make out that they protect and are the protectors of the Public Interest – or should it be those who profess to – ho hum?

    Like

    • 248
      Ed Miliband says:

      I wouldn’t wipe my twatty arse on The Observer, and that’s a paper that professes to support me.

      I read The Telegraph in secret.

      Balls reads The Beano in secret. Well actually that’s not strictly true, he gets Yvette to read it to him.

      Like

  81. 245
    The Inevitability Of Europe-Wide Capital Controls says:

    Hold on to your arse you ain’t seen nothing yet.

    Like

  82. 247
    Ed Miliband says:

    My name is Ed Miliband, and I am a twat.

    I had hoped to offset my twattishness by making Ed Balls, an even bigger twat, the shadow chancellor. Unfortunately, it appears that my ruse was unsuccessful and that the British public have seen me for what I am, a twat of the very highest order.

    Like

  83. 251
    sick of em says:

    as the snow falls again britain runs out of gas and cameron says all is well – what sort of flying fuckwit is this man? whilst the poor and unemployed are sanctioned to meet targets duncan smith denies it – how much longer can this man continue/ why are the poor and disabled being criminalised to save the elites and the bankers from facing the effects of their crimes – this government is corrupt and an enemy of the people – get rid of them

    Like

    • 262
      Labour is off its Ed says:

      Up your medication ‘sick’. You obviously have the attention span of a gnat and can’t remember what the heroic Leiber stasi did to this once great country for 13 years, and all of a sudden, according to your beffudled head, it’s the tories fault!

      You are one sick bunny/

      Like

    • 283
      Saint Tone says:

      this government is corrupt and an enemy of the people

      
      

      Yep, I managed to subvert the entire British establishment. Didn’t I do well ?
      My masters have rewarded me greatly for delivering the UK into permanent slavery.

      Like

    • 293
      Geordieboy says:

      Probably was only 6 years old when Labour came to power.

      Like

  84. 261
    albacore says:

    Why pick on Balls? It isn’t as if
    The competition he’s got ain’t stiff
    If what you’re looking for is talent
    The last place to look is Parliament
    What little they’ve got’s so very sparse
    It’s all used up licking E U arse

    Like

  85. 271
    Anonymous says:

    IDS has balls like Mr Potato Head? Bloody hell…

    Like

  86. 296
    Wurzel says:

    Come PMQ, balls reminds me of a nodding dog on the back shelf of a car. Let’s hope it falls off one day!

    Like


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Dear Sarah Wollaston… | ASI
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We also need Zil lanes.


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