March 22nd, 2013

Friday Caption Contest (Budget Brew Edition)


  1. 1
    Incapable Vince, deputy Chief Cockroach says:

    Just wait till I impose my Mansion Tax :)

  2. 2
    I Squiggle says:

    So, you know all about Twitter then? I could get you a job at the Evening Standard if you’re looking..

  3. 3
    George Gideon Oliver Osborne says:

    How much for the little ones?

  4. 4
    Anonymous says:

    Des Res meets Sub Prime

  5. 5
    Anonymous says:

    It will be a storm in gideon’s teacup

  6. 6
    Dave Bruce says:

    So…. This is awkward … I was hoping for a cuppa with little Ed

  7. 7
    Kebab Time says:

    “Osbrowne proves this is the greenest government ever”

  8. 8
    I Squiggle says:

    You’ve cancelled your holiday in Cyprus? Why’s that then?

  9. 9
    it's gordons fault says:

    which of you free interns put the budget together

  10. 10
    I Squiggle says:

    “This tea tastes like piss..”

    “Well, you’re taking iit..”

  11. 11
    it's gordons fault says:

    you think i am boring, just wait until balls is here

  12. 12
    I Squiggle says:

    Psst.. is she Simon Cowell’s daughter?

  13. 13

    Thats a nice little pad you have got this time guys..Must be your 7th or 8th Buy to Let property now guys..?

  14. 14
    Welshracer says:

    We all know what he is thinking…………

  15. 15
    I Squiggle says:

    “Er.. GSCE grade D in Maths, um.. I’ve got an old Amstrad..”

    “You’ve got the job. Ring the Treasury Monday..”

  16. 16
    George Gideon Oliver Osborne says:

    “And the thing is, they believed me”

    ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha

  17. 17
    Steve Miliband says:

    George thought his next job was at IMF. Turns out it was MFI.

  18. 18
    GrumpyRenter says:

    “And this is the new-build studio apartment you’ll be raising your family in for the next 30 years, you lucky people! No need to thank me…”

  19. 19
    spare house subsidy says:

    “..and look kids, my third home i intend to rent out”

  20. 20
    Obsessive Compulsive Behaviour says:

  21. 21
    Anonymous says:

    She’s got a nice bum.

  22. 22
    Gideon says:

    No, I am deadly serious, it’s mine now, please leave

  23. 23
    fewernotless says:

    There’s a shadow Chancellor behind you !

  24. 24
    Jzhorzhe brown'sh ghosht says:

    mines a large one!

  25. 25
    Herman Van Aerial Disease says:

    Bugger this for a game of soldiers, I’m off down the commons bar for a drop of old subsidised.

  26. 26
    Tuscan Tony says:

    Uhhhh…what’s wrong with being sexy?

  27. 27
    Steve Miliband says:

    Made in Chelsea series 5 not up to much

  28. 28
    doughas says:

    do you have any ginger nuts to go with the tea

  29. 29
    Jzhorzhe brown'sh ghosht says:

    Dianne of Cleaves?

  30. 30
    Herman Van Aerial Disease says:

    Glad to see the old bat is keeping abreast of important current affairs.

  31. 31

    Are the beds in yets….!!!!!

  32. 32
    Jzhorzhe brown'sh ghosht says:

    no that’s the schanszhellor of the eggschzschekker

  33. 33
    Steve Miliband says:

    Osborne given new cabinet position

  34. 34
    jonnygough says:

    Try not to look sad that I sold the espresso machine

  35. 35

    …and if you want some wallpaper, I’m your man.

  36. 36
    Anonymous says:

    Don’t mention were getting hb ……lol………..lots of lolly

  37. 37
    a northerner says:

    beds? – when i was yoong – we ‘ad to sleep ont’ floor!

  38. 38
    Old Barney says:

    Lets see how long it takes for them to figure out that they are drinking piss.

  39. 39
    t dog says:

    look darling, it was bad enough when you opened the door to the jehovahs witness, now you’ve let in a door-to-door wallpaper salesman

  40. 40
    TOWIE says:

    We thought we would never find anyone as thick as Joey. But we struck gold with this clown

  41. 41
    Hank The cat says:

    I suppose a shag is ou of the question

  42. 42

    OK so these are the servants quarters then..everything clear?

  43. 43
    George Gideon Oliver Osborne says:

    LOUISE !!

  44. 44
    a northerner says:

    pissing through the kitchen window? no you’ll have to share the landing bog with the other 10 families on this floor – and when that blocks don’t phone me!

  45. 45
    Diane Fatbut says:

    Only one black pair that’s totally wacist!

  46. 46

    Good heavens no! When I suggested DP, I meant Domino’s Pizzas.

  47. 47
    Ron jeremy says:

    “You do the front Ill do the back”

  48. 48
    Tay King-dePisse says:

    “Mmmmm– bit of an odd flavour, but not unpleasing; ‘Nancy Astor blend,’ I believe you called it?”

  49. 49
    Blowing Whistles says:

    The new kitchen cabinet meeting up over a cuppa. Are they infiltraitors from hacked off?

  50. 50
    RtHonJon says:


  51. 51
    George says:

    So, that’s it then, everything loaded on the van, we’ll be back for the kettle later…. where all in-it together eh?

  52. 52
    A Scotsman says:

    That’s nothing, when I were a lad we didn’t even have a floor…

  53. 53
    John Wellington Wells says:


  54. 54
    WAA says:

    BREAKING: PG Tips replace chimps with chump!

  55. 55
    Lost In The Wilderness says:

    Always thought old Georgey boy was a space cadet. Now we know he is a Vulcan.

  56. 56
    Well Spotted says:

    Wrong, those are Chukka Ummuna’s buttucks!

  57. 57
    Mr Plum says:

    I wonder if you have a left handed mug

  58. 58
    Blowing Whistles says:

    Like it SC.

  59. 59
    Leroy_Jenkins says:

    This may not be the Greenest budget ever, but this woman does have greenest dress ever!

  60. 60
    rory says:

    Fancy a weekend in Cyprus – I hear the bottom has fallen out on Euro terms

  61. 61
    verticalwater says:

    Osborn: “You punch her and I’ll come to her rescue”.

    Young chap: “Yea! like you did with the economy”.

  62. 62
    Spacker Brown says:

    “You could have smartened yourself up this, son.”

  63. 63
    Sally Bercow says:

    I’m not ‘standing’ for parliament, everyone who knows me must understand I do all my canvassing on my back.

  64. 64
    Tay King-dePisse says:

    “I DID watch The Brittas Empire, actually; that Chris Barrie bloke– he was a card, wasn’t he?”

  65. 65
    Anonymous says:

    … and modelling (,) the conservative range of mugs …

  66. 66
    Anonymous says:

    ” Look, putting in a sink and making me a cup of tea won’t fool me ! This is an extra bedroom !!”

  67. 67

    All three are jointly thinking

    “a bit weak.”

  68. 68
    Polly Tuscany says:

    Aha! British Tea Party activists.

  69. 69
    Anonymous says:

    There’s nowt like free advertising – cheers Diane

  70. 70
    Cry me a river says:

    Damn, did I leave my finger up her arse or his?

  71. 71
    Shooty* says:

    “OK, yes, I assume you’re going to put the butler and a couple of maids up in this dwelling. Should suit the domestics quite well. Shall we proceed to your pied a terre?”

  72. 72
    Anonymous says:

    Why is the cup stuck to my fingers? I’m one of David Icke’s lizard people.

  73. 73
    Anonymous says:

    Intern pondering which cnut he’ll end up with

  74. 74
    Herman Van Aerial Disease says:

    It actually looks like a Labour party poster showing it’s cabinet ministers.

  75. 75
    Tay King-dePisse says:

    Plenty of mugs around, and a fair number of them ARE Lefties…they think the press regulations will actually accomplish something good– I’d call that sort of person who would buy that nonsense a “mug,” wouldn’t you?

  76. 76

    George managed to blag his way through the FIFA vs Pro evolution soccer bit, but as Gavin moved onto Bioshock 2 he felt his comfort zone slipping away.

  77. 77
    Anonymous says:

    … and after my budget you can sell it for three times what you paid for it ..

  78. 78
    The Old Fella says:

    Gideon: He looks like a nice boy, he has a nice smile just like me.

  79. 79

    George is thinking – No tie..weird sideburns..cups that must have come from a pound shop…where the hell am I ?

  80. 80
    Anonymous says:

    I’m glad I’m not your generation.

  81. 81
    (I don't need no doctor) says:

    We can smell the coffee George, but can Ed Balls?

  82. 82
    a northerner says:


  83. 83
    Anonymous says:

    … and this is where I cook the books

  84. 84
    Residing in 96.96% white Merseyside says:

    Isn’t that how Our Dave encourages cabinet colleagues to dress at Chequers?

  85. 85
    The Old Fella says:

    That’s a good ‘un Cat, at least Gideon wasn’t let loose in the production plant

  86. 86
    Anonymous says:

    I haven’t had this must fun since the Cabinet debagged Cleggers!

  87. 87
    TreasuryGeek says:

    I’m sorry Mr Smith, but I’ve just put your wife in the (ITEM) club

  88. 88
    The Old Fella says:

    You’re not confusing Gideon with Boris are you?

  89. 89
    The Old Fella says:

    Sorry that should have been the reply to No. 41

  90. 90
    Con Artists says:

    Gideon’s threesome got off to an awkward start

  91. 91
    Inspector Hand says:

    How come Osborne’s only got three fingers on his right hand?

  92. 92
    Spasmo says:

    Seriously, who holds a mug like that?

  93. 93
    Blondini says:

    “Wuv you”
    “Wuv you, more”
    “Look at the pair of you. You haven’t got a fucking CLUE who I am, have you?”

  94. 94
    The Old Fella says:

    That is for Gideon’s Iorsh connection on St. Padraig’s Day

  95. 95
    Con Artists says:

    Gideon wasn’t sure the new immigrants would intergrate with the London community that well.

  96. 96
    Jock Strap says:

    Osborne: “Bagsy sloppy seconds”.

  97. 97
    Blondini says:

    Osborne (thinks): That’s got my finger under my pants, now if I can just…..get……….my ringpiece…..I can scratch……oh Goddddd, that’s better”.

  98. 98
    Kr1s 8ryant says:

    Can I have one?

  99. 99
    YorkshireLad says:

    “You know, I’ve had a marvellous idea to raise money. Let’s tax tea!”

  100. 100
    Blondini says:

    Osborne: “Ummmm…Tom Hanks? No, no, oh goodness…no, I’m not Tom Hanks”.
    Other bloke: “You STUPID cow! RIGHT, fuck off mate!”

  101. 101
    Rick says:

    I was in the House of Commons making an extra strong cup of tea with one of those posh teabags, y’know with the stringy thing on, when the Shadow Chancellor comes up to me giving it all this [makes talky hand gesture] about stealing his policies or something.

    ‘Ed’, I said, ‘Have you any idea how hard it is to carry out a good teabagging when you’ve got Balls in your face’? Hmmm? I’m trying to dunk my bag somewhere moist and warm while I’ve got a member coming up behind me and giving me an ear bashing. Now fuck off back to Yorkshire before I give you a chinese burn you bent bastard.’

    That man has such a punchable face, one day I’m gonna do it. I won’t be able to stop myself. I’m gonna slap him really, really hard and make him cry! I’d laugh for literally weeks.

  102. 102
    poets day says:

    … of course, reading tea leaves is only part, but a very important part, of maintaining accuracy in our fiscal forecasting…

  103. 103
    Axe The Telly Tax & Religion says:

    Yes, hang on i’ll just call Danny Alexander ;-)

  104. 104
    Axe The Telly Tax & Religion says:

    Bloody luxury, we used to live in a hole in the ground.

  105. 105
    Osama the Nazarene says:


  106. 106
    Anonymous says:

    Three mugs

  107. 107
    Inflation Nation says:

    Please sir can we have some food?

  108. 108
    Anonymous says:

    … and, once Hugh had given the O.K., it was all systems go

  109. 109
    Osama the Nazarene says:

    I hope you brought your whip Miss Lash.

  110. 110
    Anonymous says:

    audition for the next PG tips ad.

  111. 111
    Anonymous says:

    (westminster) man at work

  112. 112
    Anonymous says:

    So George …. day off from fucking the country?

  113. 113
    Perry says:

    I am sure you will find an equally nice home with less bedrooms

  114. 114
    Blowing Whistles says:

    Are those 3 huge mugs – Hugh Grant and friends at it again?

  115. 115
    Mr Trellis says:

    Look, you guys are Strivers, right? Work hard, save your money and to be honest, who has a clue what’ll happen next? Not me!

  116. 116
    No Willy jokes says:

    Diane Fatbutt, Shadow Minister for Public health, you got to be joking!!

    It would make the’ Public’ much healthier if she just cast her enourmous shadow somewhere else.

  117. 117
    Tinfoil.. hat... too... tight... says:

    A Tea-mason?

  118. 118
    Anonymous says:

    To meet our staff reduction targets, one of these three cups is poisoned.

  119. 119
    Chakra Balti says:

    “Well old chap she makes a bloody awful cup of coffee, but I assume she makes up for that in the bedroom ?”

  120. 120
    Ziggy says:

    Just proves you need to know nothing about finance and economics to become Chancellor. Just need to know the right people and do their bidding! Oh, by the way can I have the tea money?

  121. 121
    widget365 says:

    So, shall we move this through to the bedroom?

  122. 122
    Libertarian says:

    She could enter her Builder’s Cleavage. A runaway victory would be assured.

  123. 123
    Estater says:

    A good 2 up, 2 down, for a first timer.

  124. 124
    Simey G says:

    “I don’t really like tea…got any coke?”

  125. 125
    Huge Hefner says:

    Come on, get your clothes off; let’s get this porn movie made!

  126. 126
    Anonymous says:


  127. 127
    the savant 10.4 highway patrol says:

    Gideon : Kitchenette ? …. what s a kitchenette? .. oh THIS is a kitchenette

    So we re in a kitchenette now …. No I ve just never been in a kitchenette before no .. I think our one is “below stairs ” … oh no I ve never been down there that’s the majordomos province.

  128. 128
    The Countess of Wythenshawe says:

    With all those problems in Cyprus with the Euro I am keeping my finger hidden up my arse.

  129. 129

    ‘I am a Bullshitter myself, but, I do like to hear beginners at it. So please continue!!’

  130. 130
    Willer says:

    I had to choose 20% government backed loans because house prices are overvalued by at least that much.

  131. 131
    Thumper the Rabbit says:

    “… so this is where the kitchen staff work, is it?”

  132. 132
    LetThemEatCoke says:

    Okay, chum, let me explain it again. This is how the droit de seigneur works …

  133. 133
    Rightallalong says:

    George Osborne welcomes the first of the Rumanians to Britain in their new home, fully paid for by the British taxpayer.

  134. 134
    robbie says:

    I’d like more austeriTEA please.

  135. 135
    Pundit Too says:

    Three is a crowd.
    They need to get a room.

  136. 136
    LetThemEatCoke says:

    UK politics is rocked to its foundations as the British Tea Party launches its first conference.

  137. 137
    Tom Catesby says:

    ‘I noticed you have a spare bedroom’

  138. 138
    Penfold says:

    Hadn’t we better plug the kettle in to make it look more realistic?


    The exhibits at Madame Tussauds have more life in ‘em.

  139. 139
    Giddit says:

    Whose line is this time?

  140. 140
    Geordieboy says:

    MFI spot on, translates Made for Idiots.

  141. 141
    Geordieboy says:

    Diane @ Hackneyed Off.

  142. 142
    Geordieboy says:

    Only £150 a roll.

  143. 143
    Geordieboy says:

    I have got a £50 note , who has got the coke.

  144. 144
    Casting Eye says:

    He looks just like X-man James McAvoy.

  145. 145
    On the Fence says:

    George, “So this is ah……” ?

    Girl, “Kitchen.”

    George, Ah, kitchen

  146. 146
    Anonymous says:

    Look love, it’s over, Gideon and me are getting married

  147. 147
    Penny O'Pint says:

    The only 100% effective contraceptive on the market: a life size cardboard cut out of the Chancellor

  148. 148
    dbopenlock says:

    Gideon: “How many bedrooms do you have?”

  149. 149
    dbopenlock says:

    Diane Abbott: “White men love playing divide and drool”

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