March 12th, 2013

Eurocrats: Express ‘Like UFO Mag, Dangerous For Mental Health’

Well the Express seems to have well and truly got under the skin of its Eurocrat foes this afternoon. The UK’s European Parliament Information Office has thrown its toys out of the pram quite spectacularly:

“Welcome to the brave new world of EU reporting at the Daily Express, where information is bad, transparency is dictatorship, civic rights are forms of oppression and checking facts makes you blind. We do not normally find it worthwhile challenging Daily Express euromyths. It would be like trying to engage UFO Magazine in scientific debate: a waste of time and dangerous for one’s mental health.  Moreover, we are used and resigned to the peculiar phenomenon of its journalists switching off all critical faculties when it comes to taking politically motivated anti-EU tirades as fact, then working backwards to try to fit the circumstances to the ‘crime’… Providing context and balance in a story is no longer the job of the Daily Express reporter, you see. If you want balance and context you have to knit it yourself. You’d be searching in vain for this context in today’s story, reader. You will not find it. What’s worse, your ignorance of the existence of sinister educational websites set up by the Houses of Parliament leaves your children vulnerable to the horror of ‘Soviet-style’ British propaganda right here right now, under your very nose and , needless to say, with your taxes.”

Of course the European Parliament UK Information Office is funded by the taxpayer, naturally…


  1. 1
    Sandi ToxicShit says:

    There’s nothing wrong with being funded by the tax-payer.

  2. 2
    Jeremy Hardlyfunny says:

    I’ve managed to milk them with the same sketch for 30 years.

  3. 3
    Council tennant with a spare room says:

    my human rights are being infringed … can I have another spare room please?

  4. 4
    Sir William Wade says:

    Well, the EUrocrats are right for once. The Daily Excess is, indeed, a load of tosh. Takes one to spot one!

  5. 5
    The Inside Tracker says:

    They’ve only just begun their main online propaganda and rebuttal offensive but their trolls have been operating spoilers on sites like the Spectator for several months. One of them ‘beat_the_bush’ mysteriously switched from hilariously bad English to perfect English in different comments and aggressively attacked any anti-EU comments in EU subject threads. This was a trial run. Expect more online propaganda, false flag work and the same undermining by relentless use of statistics that Labour trolls engage in.

    The pseudonym used is a thinly veiled reference to George Bush, e.g. part of the “progressive” global Common Purpose project using Moscow gold, anti-Republican/Reactionary and also to “beat the bushes” to flush out anti-EU elements.

    It is a twin-pronged offensive, to be combined with their media censorship project masked under the “plurality of press” banner and which is anything but.

    Dangerous people embalmed since the Cold War and now embarked on a very sinister project.

  6. 6
    Tachybaptus says:

    Very encouraging. The eurocrats would not scream like this if they were not seriously worried.

  7. 7
    Hugh Janus says:

    Well that little tirade should get Dirty Desmond foaming at the mouth.

  8. 8
    the savant 10.4 highway patrol says:

    yes i do agree with you wholeheacrtedly but more flippantly ………

    ….are you related to alex jones ???

  9. 9
    Royal British Legion dominoes club says:

    Lets make them shit themselves, vote UKiP.

  10. 10
    Hugh Janus says:

    Not me, chum. I ditched your pathetic prog a long time ago because you are just another bitter and twisted lefty.

  11. 11
    Tosspot says:

    They don’t like it up em,

  12. 12
    NE Frontiersman says:

    If a professional spokesperson wants to engage in polemic, the least they should do is identify themselves. The Express is brash and partisan, but seems to have struck a nerve. Perhaps the EU cannot depend on finding opinion-formers to defend them who are not directly on the payroll.

    More crudely, one could say that any initiative aimed at children that originates in Belgium should be viewed warily.

  13. 13
    EU propaganda Dept says:

    You ain’t seen nothing yet ;)

    Carpet bombing with raysist card, little Engerland asides and a large dose of fruitcakes……

  14. 14
    SP4BS says:

    Writing for newspapers like the express isn’t journalism.

    Do you want your view of the world to be a parody that is designed to infuriate you, with the sole purpose of selling the product?

  15. 15
    EU Watch says:

    Troika have really just lost out to Russia with the bailout. Cyprus will be bailed out in part by Russia for most on better terms in return for giving access about transactions related to Russian account holders.

    Now: If Greece doesn’t pay up, and EU does not support EEZ to secure Oil / Gas claims, they will likely leave first the Euro, then the EU.

  16. 16
    V1le, vicious Labour ruined my Country says:

    Well done Express. It really makes me happy when these disgusting eurocruds are enraged. Keep sticking it to them. It won;t be long before the German anti euro party gets going now.

  17. 17
    SP4BS says:

    you know, you’re safe from bullshit if you just think for yourself.

  18. 18
    Rage Against the Political Elite says:

    Like all Media outlets who Knew about SIR JIMMY., Knight of the realm.. Like the Politcal class Voting for Secret Legal system… WTF do the Security Services have on them? We know what they had on Bliar and Broon. What do they have on the Media..

  19. 19
    Anonymous says:

    The eurotrash are rattled, love it!

  20. 20
    Royal British Legion dominoes club says:

    The wheels are definitely wobbling on the EU gravytrain.

  21. 21
    you'll have to do much better than call me a little Englander says:

    mass protest coming to a town near you soon

  22. 22
    Casual Observer says:

    This is the article they are complaining about:

    I would be very suspect of any site set up to specifically target children, particularly European ones. With unfinished business such as Demmink and Dutroux etc., they cannot be trusted. With open nearby borders, security cannot be guaranteed.

  23. 23
    Casual Observer says:

    And this is the kind of education they will likely be peddling:

    Your kids would be better off reading the Express and ukip dot org.

  24. 24
    Tooth fairy says:

    Keep an open mind….. There is more to UFO’s than governments are telling the people.

  25. 25
    SP4BS says:

    oops. sorry. I hadn’t read your thing all the way to the end.

    Keep worrying.

  26. 26
    Anonymous says:

    the Daily Express is a terrible newspaper. About as credible as a political party containing Neil ‘Brown Envelope’ Hamilton.

  27. 27
    V1le, vicious Labour ruined my Country says:

    No, if you’re on benefits get ready for your transfer to a caravan park.

  28. 28
    Royal British Legion dominoes club says:

    I hope Herman van aerial diseases days are numbered as chief trough snuffler and arch dictator of the EUSSR.. and the bloody organisation disappears up its own arse.

  29. 29
    EU Watch says:

    If Russia manages to sign a deal on ports, and negotiate some sort of peace deal between Greece and Turkey on East Med oil / gas, the EU for sure will come to an end sooner.

    Russia would have an interest though in preventing development, but are pragmatic.

  30. 30
    Cobblers says:

    Not so far fetched. In 2001, during the fuel protests I was working as an abstractor at a subsidiary There was a recruitment drive by the Home Office to ‘monitor’ online discussions. I went for, but didn’t get, the job. Some of my colleagues were recruited.

    Is it such a leap to think that writers may be employed to promote a particular view and/or create a feeling that certain viewpoints have wider public support than may actually be the case?

  31. 31
    Axe The Telly Tax says:

    Magic Merkel on course for a landslide victory in September in German elections and Ghastly Gillard on course for a crushing defeat in Aussie elections.

    Good news for Germany & Australia.

  32. 32
    Lord Stansted says:

    I’ll be voting UKIP.

  33. 33
    National Socialism is Socialism says:

    This is the kind of education they can keep in Europe, danke:

  34. 34
  35. 35
    Royal British Legion dominoes club says:

    Spot the anonymous lentil fart..

  36. 36
    Edinburgh Nutter. Socialism is a mental health disease and it's incurable. says:

    What a lot of bull. Onwards & upwards and look forward to the in/out referendum. Get rid of these losers.

  37. 37
    Vince Cable says:

    I don’t remember the EU.

  38. 38
    Yeah...right.... says:

    Errrrr …….

    Don’t you reside in the Eurozone, Steve?

  39. 39
    Chris Huhne says:

    My cellmate says he’s going to give me a strawberry cheesecake followed by a chili dog later. That sounds nice. Doesn’t it?

  40. 40
    fruitcake says:

    Thankyou fans

  41. 41
    fruitcake says:

    Frank Ifield

  42. 42
    Owen Jones' Mum says:

    Owen! Are you wearing my best red dress again? How many times have I told you, you little runt.

  43. 43
    Backward looking socialism is a mental illness. It is incurable in Edinburgh! says:

    Hehehe hohoho hahahaha. Moving on up! Moving forwards. Moving on!

  44. 44
    I didn't know Larry Wallis was once in UFO, did I? says:

  45. 45
    Gazza says:

    I’m no fan of the EU and I am a supporter of UKIP, but this Euro guy has a point here. The Daily Express is a truly appalling newspaper – low on facts and high on nonsense.
    There is plenty of crap to write about the EU without making up stories and distorting the facts.
    The sooner the ghastly Daily Express is closed down the better. If Lord Beaverbrook were alive today he would be turning in his grave!

  46. 46
    P l e b says:

    Pope Idol?

  47. 47
    Winnie the Pooh says:

    Bit cult-like really.

  48. 48
    The cure for political indoctrination says:

  49. 49
    P l e b says:

    Even Guido moved away from Dirty Desmond.

  50. 50
    Anonymous says:

    Fanatical newspaper suffort is rather like support for a useless football team, or voting for a dustbin full of horse manure sporting a red rosette. You won’t win an argument if you are not on their side!

  51. 51
    EU Funded Pro-EU Troll says:

    Read The Express.

  52. 52
    George Osborne says:

    Triple dip? It’s due to the wrong type of snow in Belgium.

  53. 53
    Ed "Twelvety" Balls says:

    Can anyone remind me what comes after four? Is it eleventeen?

  54. 54
    Yeah - he co-wrote and played on this etc.... says:

  55. 55
    Residing in 96.97% white Merseyside says:

    I gave up reading the Express a few years ago when it became our equivalent of the Volkischer Beobachter.

  56. 56
    Ed "Twelvety" Balls says:

    A one followed by two zeroes… is that a squillion?

  57. 57
    Tachybaptus says:

    I am old enough to remember the Express when it was still a newspaper, back in the early 1960s. Its policy on Europe was precisely the same then, and it went into ecstasies when De Gaulle vetoed Britain’s application to join the Common Market in 1963. The ghost of Beaverbrook may not be smiling on the current Express’s weird fixation with Diana, but he will certainly approve of its anti-European stance.

  58. 58
    Anonymous says:

    I do – Much better than AGurnAid!

  59. 59
    Royal British Legion dominoes club says:

    Don’t be stupid be a smarty don’t support the Labour party!

  60. 60
    Owen Jones' Mum says:

    Nooo, it’s a “dickhead”

  61. 61
    Fish and Chip Wrapper says:

    It might be Sir Willie, but the EU Evil Empire has no right to interfere with British tosh.

  62. 62
    David Cameron says:

    Does this mean I’ve won a referendum?

  63. 63
    The Archduke says:

    ““He alone, who owns the youth, gains the future.”” – Adolf Hitler.

    Tough shit your ‘EU Propaganda for kiddies’ website got rumbled euroscum,
    Well done The Daily Express

  64. 64
    Ed "No Nose" Miliband says:

    Thkinth, I think.

  65. 65
    Anonymous says:

    You won’t find a party today that can pull a crowd like that!

  66. 66
    Bryant says:

    Does that come with cream?

  67. 67
    Εd "No Nose" Mіlіband says:

    Thkinth, I think.

  68. 68
    Yes! Yes! Yes to Plain Packs says:




    MIRACLE CURE FOR CANCER / ALZHEIMERS / ARTHRITIS [delete where applicable]!







  69. 69
    Royal British Legion dominoes club says:

    Good old De Gualle.. i knew he loved us really..

  70. 70
    Royal British Legion dominoes club says:

    That dustbin full of horse manure wearing a red rosette happened to end up as a deputy prime minister I’ll have you know.

  71. 71
    Wurzel says:

    Leventy twelpenny piece.

  72. 72
    anon. says:

    EU approved ‘green’ petrol could drive up prices and leave cars damaged

    BRITISH drivers have been warned that a new EU backed “green” petrol could leave millions with higher fuel costs and even damaged vehicles.

  73. 73
    garden shed masturbateur says:

    I used to pump the folks’ sofa with this playing at 9.3 on the Hi-Fidelity system.

  74. 74
    Yes! Yes! Yes to Plain Packs says:


  75. 75
    Grrr says:

    God Bless the Express – like the News of the Screws in the 1930’s when most other papers were pro-Hitler or pro-appeasement – the Express stands up to tyrany and Socialist dictatorship.

  76. 76
    Yes! Yes! Yes to Plain Packs says:


  77. 77

    Guardian writer Simon Jenkins, on LBC, just said he doesn’t agree with a mansion tax.
    Vince Cable has just voted against a mansion tax. A tax that he, himself, introduced at a Lib Dem conference.

    Have I fallen into some sort of alternative universe?

    Is David Miliband prime minister?
    Are Chelsea celebrating a fifth successive league title?
    Is Slack Sally a virgin?

    What day is it? {grabs reader by lapels and shakes, in a 1950’s sci-fi sort of way} WHAT DAY IS IT ?

  78. 78
    Yes! Yes! Yes to Plain Packs says:


  79. 79
    Royal British Legion dominoes club says:

    Fucking excellent, go for it Owen with you in charge no bastard would vote for Labour except mumsy and a few chavs who can read.

  80. 80
    Little Englander says:

    Belgium is smaller than England.

    London is bigger than Brussels.

    Jog on Euromongs.

  81. 81
    Herman van Dr!ver says:

    Well, it was good fun, but after the troughing ended I needed to get a real job, and Deutsche Post was hiring. So here I am.

  82. 82
    Royal British Legion dominoes club says:

    Backs away… er fuck hang on.. er you’re scaring me you nutty bastard…

  83. 83

    BQ at home with Master Quango {age 3. } Hois mum gone out, leaving him in my care. He rushed up to home working dad.

    “What comes after 11?”


    “12 ..yeyh!..”

    Then a pre-school running sound on floorboards ..then a thump..then that junior running sound back to me and a breathless..”What comes after 12?”

    “What are you doing?”

    look dad..look…come with me…look how many stairs I can jump down!

  84. 84
    Silent Vince says:

  85. 85
    V1le, vicious Labour ruined my Country says:

    Yes, this can’t happen soon enough.

  86. 86
    Grrr says:

    Better a dirty publisher than a totalitarian Socialist in Brussels living off my taxes.

    And, what’s more dirty – Marxist dictatorship or a few tits..

  87. 87
    Royal British Legion dominoes club says:

    shut the fuck up you fat bastard and get on with your round, you aren’t president of the League of Trough swillers now you know!..

  88. 88
    Yes! Yes! Yes to Plain Packs says:


  89. 89
    old SHEP says:

    They don’t know which day of the week it is but
    it’s either the day before yesterday or the day after tomorrow according to the House of Commons calendar :-)

  90. 90
    Grrr says:

    Bearded hippy in sandals waving LibDem pamflet makes comment.

    Up the revolution – free tofu for the poor!

  91. 91
    Stan Butler says:

    There is a website called which is full of Eurotrons. And Irish republican slime. Great sport.

  92. 92
    argy given the v sign, will camoron send charity donations says:

    I want to know why Scots 16 year olds and 17 year olds are being allowed to vote in a referendum that effects all the people in the UK but were are not allowed to vote, this is raycist against the English, Welsh and Northern Irish.

  93. 93
    Grrr says:

    Of course its not a newspaper now

    Yes, its made of paper and has a lot of news in it – but its not a ‘newspaper’.

  94. 94
    Your Friendly Neighbourhood Cheesy Film Dialogue Service says:

    You forgot this one:

    “Who are you– and what have you done with the REAL [Jenkins/Cable]?”

  95. 95
    Grrr says:

    Yes – but the Gardian has all the latest jobs from Al Quaeda, Hammas and Islington Council.

  96. 96
    Yes! Yes! Yes to Plain Packs says:


  97. 97
    Coming to a tabloid soon says:

    Exclusive: Herman Sherman is Euro-Hookers favorite ‘toothbrush’

    Shock: van ‘Pump-me’ revealed to enjoy pluralist pleasures 27 times a night.

    Damp rag soiled by third world complaints over deviant practices. Rubber stocks fall.

    HVR ate my hamster.

  98. 98
    old SHEP says:

    Herman Van Helsing is determined to drive a stake through the heart of the British press.

  99. 99
    old SHEP says:

    Herman Van Helsing is determined to dr*ve a stake through the heart of the British press.

  100. 100
    Herman van Burnham says:

    I know nothing about deaths on the NHS, I was just following orders.

  101. 101
    The Time Machine says:

    Is it 2015 ?.

  102. 102
    Point of Information says:

    If the chavs could read, and have not read his book.

  103. 103
    Yes! Yes! Yes to Plain Packs says:


  104. 104
    The BBC & Common Purpose says:


  105. 105
    Casual Observer says:

    Have the 1922 Committee got the 46 signatures yet ?

  106. 106
    Jim says:

    Only in the summer months, and then at the seaside.

  107. 107
    old SHEP says:

    As long as the paperwork is in order I think we can all agree that yourself and Mr Nicholson have done an excellent job, please receive Iron Cross 3rd class.

  108. 108
    Hamjam Chowder-Butty says:

    Yeah, right.

  109. 109
    Popeye says:

    I like the bit about anti-euro propaganda.
    If the Eu stopped using Communist style propaganda lies 30 years ago, there would not be an EU now.

  110. 110
    DURRRRR.......... says:

    If this blog has a column in The Sun, we have no need for Herman Van Helsing’s stake, do we?

  111. 111
    No. 27583519 says:

    What’s for dinner tonight Warder?

  112. 112
    HELP! says:

    I’d like to read the full financial accounts of the EU over the past 17 years, but I cant get hold of any copies.

  113. 113
    Hamjam Chowder-Butty says:

    We want full immigrant caravan rights as well as a council 5 bed.

  114. 114
    Knife Grinders R Us says:

    Dunno. But we’ve seen a nice little up turn in business these last couple of weeks.

  115. 115
    Point of Information says:


    We can use the stake on Herman instead.

  116. 116
    note to all editors says:

    If any other newspapers were attacking the EU like they do, I’d be reading them, fuckwit.

  117. 117
    The BBC & Common Purpose says:

    Keep up the good work trolley!

  118. 118
    Yes! Yes! Yes to Plain Packs says:


  119. 119
    Jimmy says:

    I don’t see the issue. Is someone suggesting the description is inaccurate? Too mild?

    I suppose the only thing one might take issue is the suggestion that it causes mental illness. This may be simply a classic post hoc ergo propter hoc error.

  120. 120
    stun says:

    The article needed a ‘Comments are not permitted’ at the bottom.

  121. 121
    EU Directive 426XR3-Gay Marriage says:

    I think you’ll find they do.

  122. 122
    Yes! Yes! Yes to Plain Packs says:


  123. 123
    Ed "Twelvety" Balls says:

    Listen matey, I’m the next leader, I’ve pushed more than enough heads down toilets to guarantee the leadership when the Milimong is ousted prior to 2015.

    Oops, I’ve said too much already.

    Can anyone lend me a fiver?

  124. 124
    Screwed Taxpayer says:

    Surprise, surprise. the outcome of the trial paying rent bennies to the scumbags instead of direct to the landlord has resulted in a lot of them being pissed away on Stella an’ take aways. What did you expect, you fucking stupid LibLabConner politicians.

  125. 125
    Jimmy's Rightie Quote Of The Day says:

    “It made me sound like a joke Agatha Christie butler, blubber lipped and ponderous, monstrously pompous,” he told the Guardian.

    “It’s not that I mind – I am used to people making fun of me – it’s that nobody else got the same treatment. They definitely wouldn’t have done it to my brother.

    [Hitchens Minor, demonstrating his famous sense of humour and complete lack of inferiority complex to the grauniad]

  126. 126
    labourunionsbbc are one under the EU says:

    Oh, oh, the spazz is back and it looks like he’s full of E numbers.
    So far we are spared of vids, so far . . . .

  127. 127
    old SHEP says:

    A column in the sun:
    It’s nice out isn’t it?, Yes, but you’d better put it away, there’s a policeman coming.

  128. 128
    My 5: Operation Wanky Walloon says:

    You are Herman, and here is your satsuma.

  129. 129
    Royal British Legion dominoes club says:

    Proved one thing though.. they really are thick Hunts when it comes down to it.

  130. 130
    Hamjam Chowder-Butty says:

    Why is at least 2 of these 3 cartoon characters not part of the Enrichment?

  131. 131
    National Socialism is Socialism says:

    Labour did back in 1997.

  132. 132
    Iain Martian, pointless media-tart says:

    Good point, well made.
    Here is a list of types that read The Sun:
    1) Sun “journalists”
    2) Other “journalists”
    3) The BBC
    4) Anyone with the surname “Murdoch”
    5) Anyone with the forename “Murdoch”
    6) Perverts
    7) Paperboys
    8) Gamblers
    9) Armchair Sportsmen
    10) Closet Gays
    11) Can’t think of a eleven
    12) Carry Pains
    13) Staul Hole
    14) The other one

  133. 133
    MoD Logistic Tossers says:

    Which armoured vehicles due you want us to send Foreign Secretary? How about those old Champs that run on chip oil and orange juice?

  134. 134
    Iain Martian, pointless media-tart says:

    Looking back @ today’s output, I’d say the spazz has been busy wasting it’s life away.

  135. 135
    hateful wee shite says:

    IRA supporting lefty….

  136. 136
    John OFarrell says:

    somebody Irish republican slime?

  137. 137
    H.R.H. Philip Thoedolliplops "Windsor" says:

    15) I, and The Flange, tend to take it.

  138. 138
    fellow eu stormtrooper says:

    Sieg Heil!!

  139. 139

    What the Eurocrats don’t seem to get is that they are not legitimate. No one asked for the EU, no one wants the EU, and given the chance, no one ever votes for the EU.

    The EU is a non-organisation full of people doing non-jobs for absolutely no reason anyone can understand.

    The Express on the other hand can prove its legitimacy very easily by pointing to the numbers of people who voluntarily buy it every day, and have done so for many decades.

    And as for the pathetic jibe at Parliament, well, in the UK we have a tradition of equality, fairness and representation going back to Saxon times. Eurocrats don’t understand that tradition of course, but we do, and that’s all that matters.

  140. 140
    The Beast Of 1000 Names says:

    They don’t like it up them

  141. 141
    Hugh Janus says:

    I stand corrected.

  142. 142
    Alan Rusbridger says:


  143. 143
    Casual Observer says:

    No. That’s when they burn the Euro flag at the start of proceedings.

  144. 144
    Twink says:

    He was better in the Pink Faries. Kings Of Oblivion.

  145. 145
    The tolerant Owen Jones says:

  146. 146
    hilliam wague says:

    i am too busy watching legs and coe

  147. 147
    Anonymous says:

    Hi Hitch, where you bin?

  148. 148
    No Doubt says:

    Post it then ; )

  149. 149
    hold them to ac says:

    You’d be searching in vain for this context in today’s story, reader. That is so much a line out of 1984. Enjoy the Big Brother State of the EUSSR.

  150. 150
    hold them to ac says:

    And thank God they are not governed by it.

  151. 151
    The BBC and liar Mark Thompson says:

    We are vindicated over Savile, it’s now plain for all to see that it was the fault of the police all along.
    Our next DG will be a man of the highest morals, Andy Burnham. Rejoice!

  152. 152
    The Project says:

    I equate the Express with Winston Churchill when he was the lone voice against the rise of an evil, one party state. Financial uncertainty caused by vanity projects and incompetence, unelected technocrats worming their way into government, all the ingredients are there in plain site. We haven’t even got the excuse that we’re sleep walking into another human tragedy.

  153. 153
    The Beast Of 1000 Names says:

    Hiding in death’s shadow but thanks for the concern.

  154. 154
    fitz fitz says:

    Calm down, euro lads : you sound suspiciously guilty …

  155. 155
    Casual Observer says:

    And this must have been lifted from Family Circle:

    ‘If you want balance and context you have to knit it yourself.’

    Now this was a useful link:

    But the EUSSR stuff is destined for the sewer, and they know it.

    The gushing sound they can hear is not of enthusiasm and welcome, but rather it is of the flush cycle starting.

  156. 156
    Royal British Legion dominoes club says:

    Aww poor ickle Owen don’t like it when the big boys want to engage in a bit of banter.. poor ickle Owen. He’ll be fucked if he ever gets into Parliament.. they’ll eat him alive.

  157. 157
    Royal British Legion dominoes club says:

    Good grief.. HOLD THE FRONT PAGE!

  158. 158
    The Stasi In Waiting says:

    Yesterday they were ripping up newspapers. Sometime in the near future it’ll be books that don’t meet with their approval.

  159. 159

    There is nothing wrong with educating people. And the younger they are the more suggestible they will be.

  160. 160
    Anonymous says:

    Sorry to hear that Nick, thought you were minting it.

  161. 161

    I need a reason to exist.

  162. 162
    Herman van Bumsex says:

    I don’t remember issuing a directive allowing that.

  163. 163
    Josef Publik says:

    False Flags? As ein European Parliament supporting Englander, I jolly vell resent zis slur. Knees up Mutter Brown, ich bin ein cheeky cockney, who says no to ze pound and javohl to ze Euro! Mein gott, er, I mean gor blimey, apfels und pears!

  164. 164
    Fruit and Veg seller says:


  165. 165
    Julius Streicher says... says:

  166. 166
    Not even strong enough for mumsnet says:

  167. 167
    Casual Observer says:

    That conference hall looks remarkably empty.

  168. 168
    Theresa May (or may not) says:


  169. 169
    Anonymous says:

    Hear, hear!!!!

  170. 170
    The past, the past, door knockers unite and leave your underkeks on says:

    Nice to hear from an oldie, how’s the doc? and you know who I mean.

  171. 171
    Dianne Abbot says:

    A deeply RACIST tweet from the BBC:

    LIVE VIDEO: Chimney of Sistine Chapel as #conclave votes for #Pope – will smoke be black or white? #smokewatch— BBC News (World) (@BBCWorld) March 12, 2013

  172. 172
    Anonymous says:

    Goodness me, did he say the word ‘socialist’?

  173. 173
    Anonymous says:

    are yu blowme.
    dust clearer.

  174. 174
    All about Eve says:

    Please do elucidate……

  175. 175
    Anonymous says:

    do yu have a big 4head and a hairline in the shape of the number 3?

  176. 176
    arlington road says:

    you never did thank me for exposing that fatal canteen flaw with the mbr did you? you know that plot to take you know who out when she reopened it for you. but you wouldn’t would ya? you traitorous fucks.

  177. 177
    Royal British Legion dominoes club says:

    Quite convincing fritz but that bockwurst shoved down your trouser pocket and your hitler moustache gave the game away!

  178. 178
    Anonymous says:

    are yu a hero..4sum.
    or the erctile 1.

  179. 179
    Εd "No Nose" Mіlіband says:

    They did expect just this. It was a cunning plan to let them throw people out for non-payment.

  180. 180
    Royal British Legion dominoes club says:

    Hear hear.. i’ve also read some absolute bollocks in the ahem.. I feel so dirty.. Guardian.. what a pile of leftist shit that is.

  181. 181
    Royal British Legion dominoes club says:

    But they do brew some excellent beer, they had to get something right I suppose.

  182. 182
    Goebbels biggest lie says:

    So let’s get this right, a socialist, one party state goes on the fucking rampage killing millions of people, and then when it’s all over some dumb fuck, lefty historians say they were right wingers? Fuck that.

  183. 183
    labourunionsbbc are one under the EU says:

    Looks like snow and Rudman have got the taxpayers jolly in Rome. snow loves to be part of those historic moments, paid for by the masses; it gives him so much to talk about at dinner parties and fancy restaurants.

    The elite auto cue readers are the new privileged, wark, snow, et al, get to go everywhere there is something important going down, speak to the movers and shakers. How many millionaires get to fly on Air Force 1, tonails did when Cameron visited Barry; I bet that swelled his chicken neck and put him in the frame at those fancy socialist soirees.

    Nice work if you can lickspittle for the man and swallow any self respect or honour you might have had.

  184. 184
    wee logician says:

    Well, the EU brigade do live on another planet, so it all makes sense from that POV.

  185. 185
    Gooey blob says:

    So fascists are lefties now are they?

  186. 186
    Cat among the pigeons says:

  187. 187
    Big Rufus on D Block says:

    Big thick black sausage, with salty semolina for pudding.

    Close your eyes, it will taste nicer.

  188. 188
    Goebbel's biggest lie says:

    Always have been if you were paying attention.

  189. 189
    Royal British Legion dominoes club says:

    Because everyone is living in an ideal world, you lor must be shagging 72 virgin pigs in heaven with mobeefnut

  190. 190
    labourunionsbbc are one under the EU says:

    “labours lost it”

    Ha, ha. got that right, and it looks like the union boss man’s lost it too.

  191. 191
    they don't call me sly for nothing says:

    Sly Bailey resigned and fucked off before they could get to her.

  192. 192
    Royal British Legion dominoes club says:

    As you can tell it is totally unrealistic, the central bank of Europe… haha.. low inflation.. what a wheeze.. no fanatical Islamic nutters.. hoho.. if only

  193. 193
    Anonymous says:

    rattled within is the rattlr.
    3sum, the act ofcreation is fun.
    slflve is tedious4themanwhoshouldknowbetter.
    the sacred om ie.
    – is imprinted on evry part of his physical body.

    chk out the 3-0 shape on yr head (men only), forehead, ear, nose, mouth…. for starters…it is everywhere. press the zero hot spt and know what it feels to be a zero.

  194. 194
    EU public relations secretariat says:

    Dear peasant,

    The English people DO NOT EXIST they have never existed, England is a land of immigrants, the English people are a fiction, there is no such nation as England. Any such talk of England and the English is antisocial propaganda and must be discouraged with re education and mass immigration so never again will the English people who have never existed by the way will try to dominate the world with their fish and chips and awful empire building and horrible treatment of everyone.

    Supreme Reichskommissar comrade Barroso.

  195. 195
    Royal British Legion dominoes club says:

    1988.. He must have been ooh at least one.. probably protesting for the working baby for a greater share of the nipple… waah waaah..

  196. 196
    hold them to ac says:

    Shocking. That is the council that is stacking tables to “prevent damage” per the story to save the Guido readers’ time, spends £3000 on hanging baskets (but only a town council in Swansea I know!, a town council) and funds a harpist (not harpies) led dinner but not four pleading charities.

  197. 197
    Pollytwaddle says:

    The Grauniad is a fine rag – or was until I joined it.

  198. 198
    Saffron says:

    national socialism well we all know what that meant with Herr Hitlerand Stalin,millions killed and for what.
    So called politicians who did,nt give a jack shit as regards their peoples.
    We are seeing the same agenda right now but in a different way,the power people in this world are scheming to subdue the masses in their endless pursuit of power and more power.
    Can we change this,well probably not as there are too many things that are stacked against ordinary people will I list some of these,well no because it would be pointless.
    The establishment have powerful forces promoting their agenda which is not in the interests of us can we get rid of these people well IMHO absolutely not.

  199. 199
    Huhne cell fart (Chinese but fucker) says:

    Sprouts as well.

  200. 200
    Jon Snow says:

    I used my bus pass all the way.

  201. 201
    Royal British Legion dominoes club says:

    Dear Barrosso.. we understand your situation, it is hard to like a country which although small geographically managed to be fucking ace at building ships, aircraft etc and be the envy of the world which is what really became our achilles heel as our stuck in the ways management and useless arsed socialist unions managed with help from the EU to destroy all we had, Rolls Royce and Bentley are now German owned, our manufacturing indstry is all but dead but.. we won’t give up.. we can turn this around and fight back.. Stuff you.. English haters.. be proud.. get out of the EU and rebuild our nation.. encourage money into the country by lowering taxes for the rich.. its a numbers game.. better off having 50 billionaires paying 30% than none paying 60%.. get the idea?.. in turn they will invest in new factories and businesses. The socialist idea of taxing the rich to extinction hasnt worked in france.. they are all buggering off to Russia etc.. Get us out of the EU and lets rebuild.

  202. 202
    Ed Miliband of Primrose Hill says:

    I demand a judge led inquiry.

  203. 203
  204. 204
    chef says:

    A big john thomas like the milkman’s horse

  205. 205
    Fuck it says:

    So whatever happened to those massive spending cuts the BBC and Guardian have wanked on about for the last 3 years?

  206. 206
    Arse fuck for freedom says:

    Bum sex?

  207. 207
    Ah! Monika says:

    I agree. Get a real job and see what that will do for you.

  208. 208

    To all who have had enough of the EU, the government and the BBC, here is some alternative therapy:

    Just page down to the first pic. I have just driven 500km non-stop and am going straight to bed with that thought in mind…

  209. 209

    Tо аll whо hаvе hаd еnоugh оf thе ЕU, thе gоvеrnmеnt аnd thе BBС, hеrе іѕ ѕоmе аltеrnаtіvе thеrаpy:

    Juѕt pаgе dоwn tо thе fіrѕt pіс. І hаvе juѕt drіvеn 500km nоn-ѕtоp аnd аm gоіng ѕtrаіght tо bеd wіth thаt thоught іn mіnd…

  210. 210
    Someone Who Has Been Sitting Too Long says:

    Let’s not leave out:

    16) Jugglers
    17) Whoremasters
    18) Wino’s
    19) Swindlers

  211. 211
    Casual Observer says:

    There hasn’t been any meaningful cut backs.

    Deficit reduction was mainly achieved by reducing public sector investment down to zero. So, departments were not meaningfully trimmed.

    Of the 370k jobs mentioned: 25% went from central government, 75% from local government.

    Over 2010-2012: # people working for government fell by 6.4%, public pay bill rose by 2% = 9% rise in earnings per head over two years, 3x OBR forecast in 2010.

    The reason for the increase in pay cost, in spite of pay freeze and reduction of headcount, is that ‘annual increments’ were still paid out and it would appear that the bulk of the 370k were below the average pay.

    The annual increments are pay rises which are automatically awarded and determined on length of service. It may be that natural attrition is likely to kick in soon which is why they need to start hiring again.

    In terms of deficit and government spending reduction, unless the new public sector contracts are somewhat different, there has been a spectacular fail here to bring costs down now and moving forward.

  212. 212
  213. 213
    Gooey blob says:

    Saffy I hope you’re not another one who believes Hitler was a leftie.

  214. 214

    You can’t tax me

    I live in The Albany FFS

  215. 215
    the missus says:

    Once a dirty old fucker, always a dirty old fucker. And was the comment about driving 500 miles relevant or necessary? NO!

  216. 216
    Goebbel's biggest lie says:

    Was Stalin a leftie come to that?

  217. 217
    The BBC grooming the Nation for good says:

    How marvellous that all the little chillun’ shall be indoctrinated to love the EU and its works.
    Let us rejoice in the godless wondrousness of it all.

  218. 218
    Old England says:

    The English spirit can “never” be broken,whatever the situation!!!!

  219. 219

    I Dirty Desmond moved away from Guido

    He has no morals


  220. 220
    Royal British Legion dominoes club says:

    And the foundation of the EU was set up by ex Nazis, from a plan devised before WWII to unify Europe and control it.

  221. 221
    Eric n Ern says:

    There were these two old men,sat in deckchairs……..

  222. 222

    I would not want to have to choose between Dirty Desmond and Al Capone Murdoch

    Even Rushberidger is better than that

  223. 223
    the oracle says:

    Plod haven’t even started on Mirror Trinity Group buster.

  224. 224
    Mrs Jones at her wits end with young Owen says:

    Owen, what have told you about chewing the red pieces of lego. Get off to bed now, and no supper.

  225. 225
    Anonymous says:

    Let’s face it, the Express is printed on paper far too thin for the only purpose it is fit for.

  226. 226
    Fact Hunt says:

    National Socialists. The clue’s in the name.

  227. 227
    Good times coming says:

    ‘Course he was a leftie, he believed in all leftie things, and called himself a socialist.

  228. 228
    Casual Observer says:

    Careful, that sounds like a description of the Euro, and EU law.

  229. 229
    Royal British Legion dominoes club says:

    When a socialist calls me a Nazi/Fascist because I support UKiP I laugh at them.. oh the Irony.

  230. 230
    barrowboy says:

    Pro or anti , at the present rate of attrition , so far during the past 12 weeks your costs of imported gas, fuel and horse-meat has risen by approx. 11%. Dave will shout ” good for exports”. Will no-one rid us of this simpleton ?

  231. 231
    UK Watch says:

  232. 232
    rocknrolla says:

    Probably true. But they can be rendered irrelevant through ethnic cleansing, or mass immigration as many refer to it. The English will be a minority in England before many decades have passed. It was all for nothing.

  233. 233
    The One Show - the biggest pile of Soviet shit since Pravda, says:

    Don’t forget: most EU immigrants are not parasitic vermin. The only ones who are parasitic scum are the ones from Romani.. ooh! Look! Red nose day’s coming! look everyone! Look! Red noses!

  234. 234
    English lessons for socialist mongs says:

    Cuts = savings.

  235. 235
  236. 236
    UK Watch says:

    I agree.

    But in government I think cuts means: Headcount reductions and reducing capital purchases whilst allowing the actual costs to still increase.

    – They are cuts compared to what we could have been spending, logic…

  237. 237
    EU Funded Pro-EU Troll says:

    Vote UKIP.

  238. 238
    UK Watch says:

    And Campers has been forced to do a 180 degree scamper on minimum alcohol pricing:

    ‘One Treasury source described the Prime Minister’s plan as “a remarkably stupid idea”.’ : Ouch.

  239. 239
    Totally fucked and not laughing now says:

    What a good idea it seems now to unite completely disparate economies with a single currency. How we laughed when they began their insane project.

  240. 240
    frank knuckles says:

    oh i thought you said knuckles! knockers you say. as big and black as. thanks to the singular for getting my son spontaneously aerated. but that aa t35 scam was a big payer for us that are all tight of a deranged catholic persuasion… ha! so i forgive you (dunno if the slab will mind) people still slopping us monthly for that 8 years on. pity about that front page brother… has he been extradited yet? still his own fault for putting that probe video out there. don’t believe he could have been stupid enough to have actually done it himself… which begs the question just who did?

  241. 241
    Casual Observer says:

    Back when it was being done no one thought it particularly smart.

    Credibility was lost when Greece joined.

  242. 242
    UK Tax payer having to fork out for this EC stuff says:

    EUSSR propaganda. An EC Goebbels at work .

  243. 243
    Point of Information says:

    A number of the people in that video are clearly not of European origin.

  244. 244
    Fuck it says:

    Politicians are like drunk sailors in a whore house, they just can’t stop spending.

  245. 245
    stun says:

    Have to admit that I looked at the fur below.

  246. 246
  247. 247
    Storm clouds over Camoron says:

    He’s seen that 2015 is the end for him if he doesn’t start his bribing of the voter now, 2014 is going to be his killer year, what with the Euro’s and the Scottish referendum and the Romanian’s, he has a lot to make up for, as we get deeper into the third world desperation of no money and everybody laughing at him on his U-turns.

  248. 248
    Fishy says:

    ‘Labour’s Tit’ What a good headline

  249. 249
    Tom Noddy's Imp says:

    8 minutes but worth every penny.

  250. 250
    Fishy says:

    After one night inside, Huhne has complained about being bullied and has asked to be moved to another prison.

    Ho ho ho ho. Ha ha ha

  251. 251
    Spartacus says:

    not to mention the swastika on the arm

  252. 252
    Capt. Birdseye and his fish fingers says:

    I wasn’t called Birdseye for nothin’ !

  253. 253
    Blowing Whistles says:

    Yes think Marc Dutroux – pa3do networks that went all the way up the hierar.chy to top cops, lawyers, politicianns, judges – the eli.te in general – all in it together.

    I have been otherwise busy – but watching nevertheless.

  254. 254
    Huhne Watch says:

  255. 255
    CarryHole is a silly Hunt says:

    Socialism has only killed a few hundred million Jimmy says let’s give it another try!

  256. 256
    CarryHole is a silly Hunt says:

    Exports are the cost of Imports…

  257. 257
    CarryHole is a silly Hunt says:

    The whole EUSSR customs cartel is a mittel-europe based on thinking the west cannot compete and hiding behind economic castle walls.

  258. 258
    ████ 'changed my tune ' Hoon says:

  259. 259
    Blowing Whistles says:

    Churchill – was greatly in debt / hock to his gamblingdebtmeisters. He hardly knew at the time who the enemy was – he was ‘manipulated’ by all of those around him and duped into doing their bidding. His six volume tome was written well AFTER WW2 – it was written to suit the agenda of himself and his dupers/manipulators – the fu3king zioloon traveller friends of Israel.

  260. 260
    Court tomorrow says:

  261. 261
    Casual Observer says:

    The screws probably hate him more than the lags.

    Would not be surprised if he started a prison riot by accident.

  262. 262
    Blowing Whistles says:

    Which Pope was it who stated – “this god myth has served us well”?

  263. 263
    glen "margate" tully says:

    a knight of malta for all your discreet backdoor installations.

  264. 264
    'Gypsy' Dave Cooper says:

    Fucking class, well done my Sun.

  265. 265
    Blowing Whistles says:

    Tachy – you need to look at the mindsets of the 4 major press moguls in the 1920’s / 1930’s – they ‘had at that time’ assumed that ‘they’ could / DID control via their propagnada sheets as four men the whole gambit. Back then they actually did – it was they who held control. Since then other media moguls have come upon the scene and assumed that they too would be the real ‘power brokers’ – fu3king Murdoch included. Tough 5hit – they have all been “FOUND OUT” – not that they and their subordinate thicko legions of useless fools and dupes could work it out – but it has been worked out …

    They are fighting a losing battle – because day by day and its too late now to stop it – are being found out for their fiddling of children and the facts.

  266. 266
    CarryHole is a silly Hunt says:

    Kills less than International Socialist do.

  267. 267
  268. 268
    CarryHole is a silly Hunt says:

    Oh Dear. You really mustn’t believe the nonsense you get from Albeeb.


  269. 269
    Blowing Whistles says:

    The most basic of facts that has been missed by both the left and right wing ‘idiot fools’ is that Murdoch don’t give a 5hit about whichever party he hides behind [New Labour / Coalition]. Just as long as he has enough ‘dirt’ on the government of the day and can leverage minis.ters to do what is his will is all Murdoch is concerned about.

    Did I say ‘dirt’ – well he holds it (has done for over 30 years) over them as leverage – it’s called entrap.ment and blac.kmail. It’s what he does.

  270. 270
    'Gypsy' Dave Cooper says:

  271. 271
    Blowing Whistles says:

    Saffy – when enough of the thickos out there realise that Hitler and Stalin were just puppet controlled opposites who a banking family ultimately controlled – and that the banking family couldn’t lose either way (that’s the trick) then the thickos who have been DIVIDED for their thickness for decades themselves (idiot fools) might just twig what their game is < the Banking family.

  272. 272
    Edward. says:

    European Parliament UK Information Office

    Aliens, well they’d know all about that.

    Fuquits, they really don’t get it – do they?

    Let me spell it out: Fuck the EU and every single one of its bent institutions.

  273. 273
    Blowing Whistles says:

    Haven’t even looked at the link but can assume from your comment that the Cat has some odd hidden agenda to distract from the more serious issues of the public being ripped off day by day – especially by the current and those who did make their supposed money in the banking game – but who profess (rather OTT I say) to have done it all innocently / honestly.

    Methinks that the more the cat ‘learns’ of his banking / financial industry – the more he is in denial of that he ‘too’ was part of the whole banking game scam. But hey when does an old boy ever own up?

  274. 274
    Blowing Whistles says:

    The matter is of a ‘Public Controversy’ and according to their very own laws it must be resolved publicly.e.g. Huhne / Pryce.

    GeT your heads out from up yer Rses M’luds – you LOT are on TRIAL as well.

    Thanks for the heads up.

  275. 275
    Blowing Whistles says:

    She has her own ‘skeletons rattling in her cupboard’ along with hubby joshuas.

  276. 276
    Required Morning Reading says:

    I have a feeling the warder perhaps may read this blog from time to time ?

    So hope they move him out of isolation ASAP, that spoils the fun.

  277. 277
    Mboat now says:

    Damn, not just the bristols but the pouty lips to boot! Sir, I salute you for a great spot.

  278. 278
    Agent Orange says:

    That’s because there are no originals to copy from.


    That reminds me – must claim for a new bank of shredders.

  279. 279
    Aaron D Highside says:

    The Daily Express usually blames Paul Burrell for everything. Happy to see the transfer to the EU.

  280. 280
    EU public relations secretariat says:

    Dear anti social element,

    Your name will be put on the list of counter revolutionary enemies of the EU, you will be called to a re education camp shortly. What is now known as England will be handed to France for use as a rubbish dump and prison camp. You English think you are so great dont you, not that you have ever existed, soon you English running dogs of America will be pushed into the French channel.


    Reichskommissar Barroso.

  281. 281
    EU Funded Pro-EU Troll says:

    Vote LibLabCon.

  282. 282
    Edward. says:

    In with the nonce wing.

  283. 283
    Royal British Legion dominoes club says:

    Not very social is it.. this socialism lark, they should call it mentalism, looking around at all the famous mentalists who follow it.

  284. 284

    You are perfectly entitled not to like what I post. Everyone is different after all. Thank you for telling me what you thought about it. It was so fascinating the way you sculpted your thoughts into a Masonic Temple of Reasoning. If you did not enjoy it, you are cordially invited to go fuck yourself with a red hot poker.

    With fondest collegial regards,

    Schrödinger’s cat

  285. 285

    You, sir, are clearly a gentleman of great refinement.

  286. 286

    I am deeply grateful to you BW. This is, to my knowledge, the first time that I have ever had a conspiracy theory devoted solely to me. I only wish I could cut it out and frame it, being honoured in such a way.

    If your other conspiracy theories are this soundly based you should go far indeed…

  287. 287

    In art terms, it what they call montage. Seems appropriate to me.

  288. 288
    Royal British Legion dominoes club says:

    In simple terms.. if we import more than we export we are are fucked, if we pay people who send half their money back home to whatever country they come from in the EU we are fucked as they don’t spend it here or save it in our banks, if overseas companies which do business here don’t pay their share of taxes we are fucked, becuse all they do is pay wages back into the economy and bank the profits offshore, no use just chucking money at the public sector because the money isn’t a long term solution, we saw what it did during Bliars time in number 10, add our welfare bill, foreign aid and our EU contributions to the defecit and we are well and truly buggered. The only way to get things working properly is to encourage wealthy investors into this country and hopefully create businesses which will employ and train workers and export goods.

  289. 289
    Royal British Legion dominoes club says:

    And of course get out of the EU!

  290. 290
    damned impertinent questions says:

    They have their own channel on you tube too

  291. 291
    damned impertinent questions says:

    Just cause you sleep with a lesbian doesn’t make you a nonce…….I think

  292. 292
    damned impertinent questions says:

    He needs a cuddle

  293. 293
    Bluto says:

    You educate the young to think for themselves not by brainwashing them.

  294. 294
    Archie says:

    Well said that man! Go Express!

  295. 295
    Anonymous says:

    Perhaps you should really review the information on the NICAP web site before criticising UFO Magazines.

  296. 296
    Archie says:

    It might be tosh, Sir Willy, but it’s OUR tosh!

  297. 297
    Grrr says:

    The BBC likes the EU

    The BBC controls 70% of al UK TV and radio

    Therefore the EU stays

  298. 298
    Grrr says:


  299. 299
    Noncing-ocracy says:

    How the hell there was NOT a revolution in Belgium after the Dutroux affair I will never know.

  300. 300


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Alan Milburn says Labour’s scaremongering campaign for an unreformed NHS will not win election…

“It would be a fatal mistake, in my view, for Labour to go into this election looking as though it is the party that would better resource the National Health Service but not necessarily put its foot to the floor when it comes to reforming. Look, reforms are not easy, but the Labour Party is not a conservative party. It should be about moving things forward not preserving them in aspic. You have got a pale imitation actually of the 1992 general election campaign, and maybe it will have the same outcome. I don’t know.”

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