March 3rd, 2013

Download the Free Guido App Today


  1. 1
    Kebab Time says:

    Will do soon :)

  2. 2
    Fuck it says:

    Does it try to block your IP address like this site does?

  3. 3
    Charles from Wales says:

    Any news on the old bag popping her cloggs?

  4. 4
    Dreary Steeples says:

    1130 times in poll position.

  5. 5
    Butch Dave says:

    This lady’s not for turning!

  6. 6
    A Pleb says:

    Which NHS hospital is Her Majesty in? I want to send some flowers.

  7. 7

    Would love to but it isnt free on kindlefire.

  8. 8
    A National Treasure says:

    Bagsy cop a feel when she’s dead in the morgue.

  9. 9

    Brilliant. Love it. Will probably use it all the time!

  10. 10
    amongymous says:

    Strangely for one who trumpets his commitment to free speech, Guido’s mods have banned this video from being embedded in a post so I’ll just give the link, worth watching since it is effectively what the left have done to our societies:

  11. 11
    app this mutha fucka says:

    Does anybody know how to make this work on an iProd?

  12. 12
    CarryHole is a stupendous Hunt says:

    telegraph reveals itself…

    The article says a lot more about the editors of the tele than it does about Italian politics.

  13. 13
    brown dog says:

    I think you will find it’s the libertarian right that have done this.

  14. 14
    Location, Location, Location says:

    Guido’s app has more Spys than MI5.

  15. 15
    STC says:

    Will it work on my Trimphone®?

  16. 16
    Casual Observer says:

    A list of tight seats, < 2% majorities held since 2010 GE.

    The conservative seats are particularly fragile with the rise of UKIP:

    2010 Election: Marginal Seats, <= 2% Majority
    Constituency             |MP (Party)                 |Majority / Over 
    Warwickshire North       |           Byles, Dan (Con)|Con: 0.11% / Lab
    Camborne & Redruth       |      Eust!ce, George (Con)|Con: 0.16% / LD 
    Thurrock                 |  Doyle-Price, Jackie (Con)|Con: 0.20% / Lab
    Hendon                   |      Offord, Matthew (Con)|Con: 0.23% / Lab
    Oxford West & Abingdon   |    Blackwood, Nicola (Con)|Con: 0.32% / LD 
    Cardiff North            |      Evans, Jonathan (Con)|Con: 0.41% / Lab
    Sherwood                 |        Spencer, Mark (Con)|Con: 0.43% / Lab
    Stockton South           |       Wharton, James (Con)|Con: 0.66% / Lab
    Broxtowe                 |         Soubry, Anna (Con)|Con: 0.74% / Lab
    Lancaster & Fleetwood    |    Ollerenshaw, Eric (Con)|Con: 0.78% / Lab
    Truro & Falmouth         |        Newton, Sarah (Con)|Con: 0.90% / LD 
    Newton Abbot             |   Morris, Anne Marie (Con)|Con: 1.09% / LD 
    Amber Valley             |         Mills, Nigel (Con)|Con: 1.16% / Lab
    Waveney                  |        Aldous, Peter (Con)|Con: 1.50% / Lab
    Wolverhampton South West |          Uppal, P@ul (Con)|Con: 1.72% / Lab
    Harrogate & Knaresborough|        Jones, Andrew (Con)|Con: 1.95% / LD 
    Morecambe & Lunesdale    |        Morris, David (Con)|Con: 1.99% / Lab
    Solihull                 |          Burt, Lorely (LD)|LD: 0.32% / Con 
    Dorset Mid & Poole North |       Brooke, Annette (LD)|LD: 0.58% / Con 
    Norwich South            |         Wright, Simon (LD)|LD: 0.65% / Lab 
    Bradford East            |           Ward, David (LD)|LD: 0.90% / Lab 
    Wells                    |           Munt, Tessa (LD)|LD: 1.43% / Con 
    Hampstead & Kilburn      |      Jackson, Glenda (Lab)|Lab: 0.08% / Con
    Bolton West              |       Hilling, Julie (Lab)|Lab: 0.19% / Con
    Ashfield                 |     De Piero, Gloria (Lab)|Lab: 0.39% / LD 
    Sheffield Central        |      Blomfield, P@ul (Lab)|Lab: 0.40% / LD 
    Southampton Itchen       |         Denham, John (Lab)|Lab: 0.43% / Con
    Edinburgh South          |          Murray, Ian (Lab)|Lab: 0.72% / LD 
    Chesterfield             |        Perkins, Toby (Lab)|Lab: 1.20% / LD 
    Wirral South             |     McGovern, Alison (Lab)|Lab: 1.33% / Con
    Derby North              |    Williamson, Chris (Lab)|Lab: 1.36% / Con
    Swansea West             |Davies, Geraint (Lab/Co-op)|Lab: 1.42% / LD 
    Dudley North             |          Austin, Ian (Lab)|Lab: 1.68% / Con
    Hull North               |       Johnson, Diana (Lab)|Lab: 1.92% / LD 
    Rochdale                 |       Danczuk, Simon (Lab)|Lab: 1.94% / LD 

    17 Conservative
    13 Labour
    5 Lib Dem

    For the Conservatives, it is worth noting that George Eust!ce is a member of the 1922 Committee.

  17. 17
  18. 18
    Kebab Time says:

    Excellent work CO.

  19. 19
    Erskine May says:

    That pre is very useful. You will be doing bold soon at this rate!

  20. 20
    Pin-u-down Analysis says:

    Bob from Pinner is our resident troll. He used to post as Ewаnme until Guido kicked him/her off. He steals other people’s monikers and adds different website addresses.

    Kebab Time‘s website is h**p:// Bob changes this to h**p://

  21. 21
    theDuchyofspitebeast says:

    Hairy Hole needs some topiary

    Is it true that HMQ has died?
    If so its wonderful and we get some fantastic memorial biscuits in Waitrose

  22. 22
  23. 23
    MI7 says:

    True. But they are not gay though.

  24. 24
    Anonymous says:

    Precisely! I hadn’t thought about this… The mainstream media attacks anyone who is “off message”….

  25. 25

    but it says blogspot

  26. 26
    theDuchyofspitebeast says:

    He is also a screaming Hom

  27. 27
    Always worked before says:

    Lower it into a bucket of water.

  28. 28
    Bob from Pinner says:

    @Pin-u-down Analysis

    You are 8illy and I claim my five pounds

  29. 29
    B0b from P1nner says:

    You are 8illy and I claim my five pounds

  30. 30
    amongymous says:

    Really interesting – I didn’t realise that so many were that close. UKIP could easily decide the fate of the conservatives. Cameron has never disguised that he is a Blairite social-liberal who is ardently pro-EU so I see little difference if we have Militwat and Balls in. Every year more than half a million invaders arrive – the Tories won’t stop this so what’s the point of them?

  31. 31
    Bobby from Pinnar says:

    Hi di hi

  32. 32
    One Term Dave says:

    It’s nearly 9 o’ clock and I’m still Prime Minister!

  33. 33
    pantywaist says:

    Billy may be an iron but he’s OK.

  34. 34
    theDuchyofspitebeast says:

    They have better dress sense than socialists !
    Ju ook at that necklace worn by war criminal Blair

  35. 35
    pantywaist says:

    Bіlly may be an iron but he’s OK.

  36. 36
    Boristhebeast says:

    I have your back!

  37. 37
    Polly is such a caring Lefty. NOT!!!! says:

  38. 38
    Casual Observer says:

    See previous thread to get some idea of what UKIP would do in the SE of England, if the Eastleigh performance was repeated in GE tomorrow.

    NB: It is a very crude analysis, but essentially 8 conservative seats would be lost to Labour, UKIP would nudge into second in most SE constituencies. Demonstrates the problem of the vote being split, which is why it is important for people now to make up their mind which they consider to be the conservative party: either the Conservatives (center left liberal under Dave) or UKIP (center right libertarian).

    It would require only less than 0.5% further shift away from Conservatives to start getting UKIP seats in the SE.

    Am working on some of the other regions doing similar with the 2012 by-election results.

    There was one other tight seat at 2010 GE: Oldham East and Saddleworth. The GE result was declared void, and the seat was retained with a 10% Labour majority over Lib Dems in the Jan 2011 by-election.

  39. 39
    Polly Riot says:

  40. 40

    Master Baiter was much more fun. :)

  41. 41
    Rabbi Chaim Weiner says:

    Blowing Whistles is a hоlоcaust denier. He will be cut down tonight if he dare show his face.

  42. 42
    Anonymous says:

    Labour candidate John O Farrell cheered when the IRA blew up the Gand Hotel in Brighton. I think that says we need to know about lefties.

  43. 43
    Saffron says:

    You Kip to me are the party who will kill off the other three parties of traitors we have presently in this land.
    They are the only party who are saying it what it is like,have they gelleld as to what the public expect well yes they have and that is why a message is being posted to the british public that enough is enough.
    Politicians of all breeds in british now are nothing more than troughers feeding off us.
    Will the british public realise this,well probably not,and so we will be into a rough time ahead.

  44. 44
    The Andrew says:

    And they put him in as candidate for the home of the Royal Navy. I think that says we need to know about Labour.

  45. 45
    Cadaveric Spasm says:

    You first

  46. 46
    We are all exactly the same as you here says:

    20-something basket case. Feminist, left-winger, spiritual atheist, blogger and student.


  47. 47
    albacore says:

    Has the N H S got special dispensation
    From abiding by criminal legislation?
    Are hospitals places where murder’s not a crime
    And nothing more than one way of passing your time?
    If the staff can do it with complete immunity
    Can you walk in with a shotgun and join in the spree?

  48. 48
    Polly Bigot says:

  49. 49
    Anthea says:

  50. 50
    C Knellswear says:

    d’Ancona’s really lost the plot.
    It ain’t looking good for the UsedtobetheTorygraph.

  51. 51
    Anonymous says:

    Youthful resistance to authority is something most of us have experienced. Cheering as people are killed and maimed by bombs is just sick.

  52. 52
    No steps forward 100 steps back says:

    Camoron on tv being a big brave boy, nothing will change, he’s twisting his handbag over his head trying to sound hard but with that yellow streak getting in the way, 2015 Camoron you lose, we lose, because your lunatic mates in Liebour will get in, but as there’s no money tree, no hope, no savings and millions of immigrants with their hands out wanting free money and we have only the Liverpool pathway and Stafford to bother us, who cares, the country is dying and you and your mates are to blame.

  53. 53
    Who drank my William Beveridge? says:

    The NHS is wonderful if you ask our populi vox
    You go in feeling healthy and come out in a box.

  54. 54
    Novovirus says:

    Polly is the dreaded winter vomiting bug.

  55. 55
    Anonymous says:

    but they might have the MI6 factor.

  56. 56

    Should we invoke the three billy goats ?

  57. 57
    sadowitz says:

    O’Farrell has also admitted wanting Britain to lose the Falklands War and writing jokes for Gordon Brown.
    Losing Eastleigh is just the latest in a long line of spectacular failures for the balding fuckwit.

  58. 58
    Carl Marks says:

    How very depressing.

  59. 59
    M102 says:

    Got my first smartphone yesterday downloaded the android app works great.

  60. 60
    Pwned says:


  61. 61
    uktgfukfy says:

    Not to mention Mossad. If anyone wants to know who holds what opinions here it’s the ZioLoons.

  62. 62
    Anonymous says:

    juju if u want.

    जी is compliant.
    oh.m 1.




    before 1 it was all about zero…..nothing.
    what is one if not the creator of truth?
    the mightier the 7, the greater the pawaar.
    7 could have the pawaar of a ferrari.

  63. 63
    Anonymous says:


  64. 64
    Anonymous says:

    radioactive catty act.
    bnice. a badmoodwillpass.

  65. 65
    Casual Observer says:
           Guido Seven Up
     Total Visitors Past 10 weeks
    180000 ┌                    
    162000 ├                    
    144000 ├             █      
    126000 ├     █     ▄ █     ▄
    108000 ├   █ █ █ █ █ █ █ ▄ █
    090000 ├   █ █ █ █ █ █ █ █ █
    072000 ├   █ █ █ █ █ █ █ █ █
    054000 ├ ▄ █ █ █ █ █ █ █ █ █
    036000 ├ █ █ █ █ █ █ █ █ █ █
    018000 ├ █ █ █ █ █ █ █ █ █ █
    000000 ┼─▀─▀─▀─▀─▀─▀─▀─▀─▀─▀
    20121229 thru 20130302 
    Busiest Week: 20130209 (149455)
    - Toby Helm’s Twitter Spat With Gove SpAds
    Quietest Week: 20121229 (53289)
    - New years.
  66. 66
    Sir Richard Richard says:

    What’s the music?

  67. 67
    Shhhhhhh! says:

    “To learn who rules over you, simply find out who you are not allowed to criticise.” ~ Voltaire

  68. 68
    The Public Are Generally Law-Abiding Even If Politicians Aren't says:

    If the government doesn’t start bringing charges for murder through the UK courts soon i think some citizen is gong to have to report Burnham directly to the International Criminal Court in the Hague.

  69. 69
    Jimmy says:

    At least she didn’t make those crappy records in the 80s

  70. 70
    Casual Observer says:

    Burnham should be reported in any case.

    It does appear though that before the NHS and child abuse stuff is prosecuted, the government really wants to close the courts to the public.

    That should not be allowed to happen.

    In an free and open democracy there is absolutely no justification for in-camera courts.

  71. 71
    Owin Jones says:

    The latest front in Operation Divide and Rule sees soldiers being used to fight a political battle

  72. 72
    Jimmy says:

    It’s the first app ever designed specifically to insult a smartphone’s intelligence.

  73. 73
    Blowing Whistles says:

    Get fucked you mantra loving Roths.childabuser.

  74. 74
    Casual Observer says:

    Farage on Marr show today (3/3/2013), if anyone missed it:

  75. 75
    Mong Watch says:

    Answer: No.

  76. 76
    Drone Pilot says:

    What happened to that Assange Chap?

  77. 77
    EU Watch says:

    An article on Gillo from back in 2005, about the time he was starting with 5-Star:,9171,1112803,00.html

  78. 78
    Tachybaptus says:

    A tasty bit of ASCII art. Reminds me of when all bar graphs looked like that, and the world was yoing.

    There is something special about the Seven Up post, I think, which is that almost no one reads the text of the post. They’ve read the original posts and don’t want to read them again. Therefore they open this post purely so that they can have a look at, and add to, the comments — an agreeable pub fight to pass an idle moment when you’re back from the real pub fight.

    Guido told me that he thinks only 50 people care about the comments. I think he’s wrong about that, and that the number of readers of Seven Up demonstrates it.

  79. 79
    Tachybaptus says:

    … and the world was young. But it was yoing too. I was there.

  80. 80
    EU Watch says:

    Documentary from 2008 on Grillo:

    NB: He got to where he is now by starting a blog as a reaction against !taly’s political class. A blog a little like this one, but with more humor focus. ;-)

  81. 81
    Back in the EUSSR says:

    David Camorons ” Conservatives ” a right bunch of opportunisic pricks dont you think ?

  82. 82
    bendy says:

    it’s always good to pop in to fascist daily and check out what the looney mobsters are up to – banning human rights next hey – what an utter load of shity tospotsthere are

  83. 83
    Back in the EUSSR says:

    You sound like a typical stupid c unt who believes torture and illegality ran rampant before the introduction of the completely unecessary ECHR. Tell what did we lack before its introduction ?

  84. 84
    Tachybaptus says:

    However, we are in an oligarchy that presents the appearance of a democracy by giving us a choice of three near-identical parties, and it is about as open as a submarine with the hatches welded shut.

  85. 85
    Casual Observer says:

    A mere bagatelle in Excel. Line plot is next on the list, ala gnu plot.

    I would agree with you on the 50 count. If only 1% of the site visitors skim the comments, then that is > 1000 / week reading them. I would suspect more than 1% do read.

    As people consume internet blogs more, they will start looking at the comments more. Same deal with the news sites.

    Combined with a harvest from Twitter every now and then you get the presented story, and the combined impartial insight of many others.

    This is a powerful way of building knowledge fast, especially if combined with a good indexing system.

  86. 86
    EU Watch says:

    Not an OCD post, but another good article on Grillo concerning his announcement about !taly and exit strategy from the Euro:

    The Pew poll included is instructive. Of Greece, France, Germany, Spain and !taly, !taly is least in favour of keeping the Euro, and most in favor of returning to national currency.

    The desire to return to the Lira is not new in !taly though.

    From 2005, on Jun 3rd:

    ‘Roberto Maron!, Mr Berluscon!’s social security minister and a joint acting leader of the Northern League, said his party would start collecting signatures for a referendum on the issue later this month. He also appealed for the process of ratifying the EU constitution to be halted.’

    – Guardian article: h**p://

  87. 87
    Rabbi Chaim Weiner says:

    Yep. I bet you say that in court to the judge, you fucking spazmoid. You’d get locked up for a week. What did you do there? Get the tea?

  88. 88
    Jimmy says:

    Perhaps Britain will have the courage to stand shoulder to shoulder with fantastically democratic Republic of Belarus, currently the only European country brave enough to reject the Convention.

  89. 89
    Jimmy says:

    I forgot Kazakhstan. Sorry Borat.

  90. 90
    Arfur Bowden (no relation) ASCII says:

    Hello playmates – let me bring you a little sunshine …
    Here before your very eyes :

                ( ////;)  
              ('.;'//`. )
            ⌉  A S K E Y  ⌈
              \  ! ! !  /
                \ !!! /
  91. 91
    Arfur Bowden (no relation) ASCII says:

    Hello playmates – let me bring you a little sunshine …
    Here before your very eyes :

                ( ////;)  
              ('.;'//`. )
            ⌉  A S K E Y  ⌈
              \  ! ! !  /
                \ !!! /
  92. 92
    Anonymous says:

    Are you for real?

  93. 93
    Tachybaptus says:

    A convention on human rights that actually served the interest of the rights of humans would be a wonderful thing that any decent person could support wholeheartedly. A convention that goes to great lengths to to protect the perpetrators of violence and ignores their victims is another matter. Those who still support it do so largely to avoid rocking the boat. But the boat is sinking.

  94. 94
    Floating Voter says:

    Me neither. Its true

  95. 95
    EU Watch says:

    Perhaps a little known fact, but euthanasia is legal in Belgium.

    The government have recently started to debate on whether euthanasia can be extended to minors:

    They were surprised to find that active euthanasia has taken place already, somewhat illegally. No indication if any prosecutions are to take place.

    This is wholly different to the killing fields of the NHS under Labour.

    To get an idea what death by starvation and dehydration looks like consult the pictures taken by allied forces when they entered the concentration camps of the NSDAP.

    Burnham and his collaborators must be prosecuted.

  96. 96
    EU Watch says:

    The parallels with what happened on the NHS though are striking:

    – 32% of all assisted deaths in Flanders were performed without consent.
    – 47% of all assisted deaths in Flanders were not reported.
    – Nurses were performing assisted deaths, even though this is totally illegal under Belgian law.

    ‘Belgium was the second country in the world after the Netherlands to legalise euthanasia in 2002.’

  97. 97
    Jimmy says:

    “A convention on human rights that actually served the interest of the rights of humans would be a wonderful thing that any decent person could support wholeheartedly.”

    I think that’s what I just said.

  98. 98
    Jimmy says:

    139% of rightie statistics turn out on closer inspection to be made up.

  99. 99
    Tachybaptus says:


  100. 100
    Bob from Pinner says:

    I say, that is not fair

  101. 101
    Tachybaptus says:

    While lefties content themselves with a modest 100%.

  102. 102
    JabbaTheCat says:

    I like this one…

    ……..(‘(…´…´…. ¯~/’…’)
    ……….”…\………. _.·´

  103. 103
    JabbaTheCat says:

    Yep, yet again Ukip fails to win a seat…

  104. 104
    JabbaTheCat says:


  105. 105
    JabbaTheCat says:

  106. 106
    albacore says:

    Protests about the N H S they can’t be arsed to gag
    But when folks start trying to defend the union flag
    Lo! Even unto your kids’ and your granny’s generations
    They’ll bust in and confiscate all means of communications

  107. 107
    Archie says:

    And you may kiss this…………………….

  108. 108
    In Praise of Nonsense says:

    The elephant is a bonnie bird,
    It flits from bough to bough.
    It makes its nest in a rhubarb tree
    And whistles like a cow.

  109. 109
    Catty Comment (Ms) says:

    But more than three times as many people voted Against the winner than for him. So how can he claim to have a mandate to represent their views?

    Isn’t our ‘democracy’ wonderful?

  110. 110
    Julian the wonder horse says:

    Nothing (yet)

  111. 111
    Julian the wonder horse says:

    Today I saw upon the stair
    a little man who wasn’t there.
    He wasn’t there again today
    Oh how I wish he’d go away.

  112. 112
    Arfur Bowden (no relation) ASCII says:

    Oh dear ! Did you really want a choc-ice ?

  113. 113
    bloody alarm-clock says:

    James Kirkup’s woken up a bit late.

    Some of the more perspicacious amongst us never trusted the shifty little sod in the first place.

  114. 114
    The Lies of the Left exposed says:

    Jimmy you are a complete tosser if you think our legal system before the introduction of ECHR was anything like Belarus. What a tit, mind you I understand why you argue thus because most of the fuckwitted public fall for such nonsense.

  115. 115
    Casual Observer says:

    Thornton had a very clear 4% majority, including the postal votes.

  116. 116
    Jimmy says:

    It’s a sign of how far the party has moved to the right that it is no longer prepared to abide by human rights standards drafted by the Churchill administration.

  117. 117
    old SHEP says:

    It generally takes about ten years for the MSM to wake up to anything that’s going on, bit like having train drivers that can’t understand why metal horse always runs on rails.

  118. 118
    old SHEP says:

    It generally takes about ten years for the MSM to wake up to anything that’s going on, bit like having train dri8ers (still off with this nonsense I see, Mod) that can’t understand why metal horse always runs on rails.

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“Adjustments” Not Cuts | Gary Gibbon
The New Puritans | Alex Wickham
British Minister in Watch Gaffe | Straits Times
New Tory, New Danger | Laura Perrins
UKIP Could Work With Dave If Price is Right | Douglas Carswell
Cops Catch Crims With B.O. Test | Techno Guido
Bashir’s “False Account” to His Own Lawyers | Times
Injustice of Tax Avoidance Hysteria | City AM

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