February 25th, 2013

Clegg Does a Runner

Having flown in from Spain last night to make the Rennard crisis worse, Nick Clegg has done a runner. Guido just spoke to the LibDem press office who said he had got on a flight at Heathrow. They did not know, or were not saying, where he is going, but it was not mentioned in the timetable briefed to the lobby this morning.

Where’s Wally?



  1. 1
    devonblokes says:

    Brickin it.

  2. 2
  3. 3
    Red Ed Miliband says:


  4. 4
    Calamity Clegg says:

    I’m on my way to Brussels, Guido

    I have a long-standing agreement with the European Commission

    When things get to sh*tty in the UK, I move in Brussels…

  5. 5
    Lol says:

    Off to suck Van Rompey’s cock.

  6. 6
    WVM says:

    He is off to Brussels to ask his paymasters for a different job. Either that or he is off to one of his billionaire banker families castles.

    Quissling little Euro traitor.

  7. 7
    Le Monde correspondent says:

    Actually he is off to his Dad’s Chateau in France…

    He’s quite right

    Britain is no longer worth any effort…

  8. 8
    it's gordons fault says:

    he has gone to receive new orders – he is a fifth columnist – selling everyone out

  9. 9
    The Right Honourable George Osborne Mp says:

    I think we’ve got a very clear message, a loud and clear message that Britain cannot let up in dealing with its debts, dealing with its problems, cannot let up in making sure that Britain can pay its way in the world.

  10. 10
    left wing, right wing, it's all the same bird! says:

    As supposedly the 2IC of the country…… shouldn’t his whereabouts be pretty much known at all times?

  11. 11
    Red Ed Miliband says:


  12. 12
    Sometimes life does surprise you says:

    Skulkin somewhere, he should be proud, it’s not a homosexual problem it’s something I didn’t think would ever happen in the Libcrap party a heterosexual problem must be a first, high 5, it will go into political history,.

  13. 13
    Jimmy says:

    Phew. For a moment there I thought you were bored with the Rennard thing.

  14. 14
    Downing Street spokesman says:

    The Prime Minister is pleased to announce that he has appointed Mr Nick Clegg a Life Peer

    Mr Clegg has taken the title of Lord Clegg of Brussels and all things European

  15. 15
    Tooth fairy says:

    Off on a job interview.

  16. 16
    brusselsproutsbeast says:

    Probably gone to Belgium fgor some “Liberal” fun

  17. 17
    Chris Coon says:

    Cleggy! Cleggy! Cleggy!
    Out! Out! Out!

  18. 18
    Downing Street spokesman says:

    Sir Jeremy Heywood, soon to be Lord Heywood of Morgan Stanley and Big Bucks, is second in command in Britain….

  19. 19
    Sir Mary Flappes says:

    Has gone to regain his Dignitas?

  20. 20
    Herman Van Rumpypumpy says:

    We like you Mr Clegg, we like the way you apologise for everything.
    You’re just what we need.
    When can you start?

  21. 21
    Spank Sinatra says:

    His ability to make things worse never fails to amaze. The lobby will tear him apart.

  22. 22
    Jack Straw says:

    I cannot tell you were he is going, but I can tell you it is via Diago Garcia

  23. 23
    limp wick lighter's guild says:

    its thought hes gone to identify his spine found in a shallow liberal grave

  24. 24
    Grammar School Boy says:

    Voters of Eastleigh take note …

  25. 25
    Judith Charmless says:

    He’s in some garage somewhere with the hose connected to the exhaust…

  26. 26
    S Hughes says:

    I shall be on top now.

  27. 27
    VonCleggster says:

    You’ll never find me…. you b&^$£ards!

  28. 28
  29. 29
    Owin Jones says:

    George Galloway giving racism a bit of a bash. The cowardly toe-rag !!


  30. 30
    WVM says:

    Hang the bastard!

  31. 31
    Lib Dem HQ says:

    It’s a calamity (yet again!)

  32. 32
    Time 2 CTRL, ALT & DEL says:

    run off with the cardinal i think

  33. 33
    Nick Clegg says:

    Off to the ‘dam for some super skunk

  34. 34
    Ester Rancid says:

    I knew he was in on it, but what could I do.

  35. 35
    Penfold says:

    Orff to Brussels, to ask them to intervene, and take competency.

    Can we ensure that he’s not allowed back……..

  36. 36
    Guido's little Helper says:

    Here you Go Guido. Put ur Meeja hat on.

    Deputy Prime Minister press office

    If you have a query outside of working hours please contact 07699 113300, quoting reference number 721338.

    Head of Communications and Official Spokesman for the Deputy Prime Minister

    James Sorene – 020 7276 2544

    Chief Press Officer

    Peter Graham – 020 7276 2546

    Senior Press Officer (social mobility)

    Katherine Pateman – 020 7276 0516

    Senior Press Officer (political and constitutional reform)

    Bob Honey – 020 7276 0432

    Senior Press Officer (economy – growth and infrastructure)

    Katie Ellison, 020 7276 5461

    Senior Press Officer (economy – decentralisation; foreign affairs and Europe)

    James Hotson – 020 7276 0203

    Please be aware that the Press Office deals with media queries only.


  37. 37
    Guido says:

    Can you reverse the charges?

  38. 38
    Cleggonomics says:

    I am off to North Korea where they will fully appreciate me.

  39. 39
    Operation Crossbow says:

    The BBC are doing their bit for their lefty bum chums today. Radio 5 has hardly mentioned it other than the vile Nicky Campbell talking about groping.

    This is NOT a story about groping it’s about Clegg’s leadership and the trustworthiness of the Limp Dims. The BBC are shitting themselves that the Tories or even worse UKIP might win the by-election

    Even Victoria Derbyshire just wanked on about “Tory cuts” again today.

  40. 40
    Patrick Hamilton says:

    To save money, the Lib Dem Party and the Roman Catholic Church so that Lord Rennad and Cardinal O’Brien can be investigated at the same time

  41. 41
    Gone with herman? says:

  42. 42
    Anonymous says:

    Clegg showing us his best side again.

  43. 43
    Casual Observer says:

    Where is Mandelbum ?

    I think he may be having a word.

    Likely a ‘family emergency’ has just happened.

    He is a fifth columnist, but more likely a double agent. Does sound like he has been recalled by his handler.

  44. 44
    PM says:

    It’s time for a follow up to this:

  45. 45
  46. 46
    Nick Clegg says:

    Look what is all the fuss about. I’ve just nipped out for a pint of New Zealand gold top

  47. 47
    you need to do much better than call me a little Englander says:

    If Rennard’s advances had been successful what then is the difference between him and Ed Ball’s leg up given to Yvette Cooper or John Major on Edwina Currie.
    Sounds like lib dem birds are just frigid

  48. 48
    Liberace says:

    He’s buggered off. It’s the right thing to do.

  49. 49
    Chris Davies says:

    Perhaps he didn’t fancy explaining what the redacted charge in this report was all about? This looks set to get much worse: http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/politics/liberaldemocrats/9892394/Revealed-what-Cleggs-top-aide-knew-about-Lord-Rennard.html

  50. 50
    Not Lembit Opik says:

    With party members (including at least one MP) calling for his resignation, Clegg has fled to Europe looking for a cushy, highly paid job amongst his friends.

    It’s looking possible that he could be out within a month.

  51. 51
    Anonymous says:

    That’s a Huhne dream,

  52. 52
    Lard Arse says:

    Being a repulsive fat git never harmed my chances of shagging a secretary either.

  53. 53
    Huhne says:

    Ha, ha, ha, Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.

  54. 54
    grass roots says:

    Has leading Lib Dem feminist and “champion of womens rights” Jo Swinson MP resigned yet over her part in the cover up?

  55. 55
    Nick Clegg says:

    Yes I am at Heathrow. I’m not flying anywhere though, I just like to knock one out watching all those immigrants entering Britain.

  56. 56
    the stench of hypocrisy says:

    Tory “cuts” haven’t affected her ability to fly to Salford daily.

  57. 57
    Renn Ards tiny knob says:

    Can you have a penis extension on the NHS?

  58. 58
    Calamity Clegg says:

    Oi !

  59. 59
    Must get a pseudonym one day says:

    Flown off to the Vatican – he’s heard there’s a vacancy where his dual talents for evasion and apologising could prove very useful in the coming months.

  60. 60
    white flight says:

    The blacker it gets, the more he likes it.

  61. 61
    Jimmy the Dhimmi says:

    No. We’re fine with the Rennard ‘thing’, as you call it.

    We’re just bored with you.

  62. 62

    The Rennard Buffuna is the car for the social democrats of today.
    The Buffuna comfortably seats 5, which is handy as the entire Liberal Democrat 2015 elected MPs can travel to Westminster together. Very Green!

    The Rennard Buffuna comes with full expensive climate control that does nothing. Automatic wishy-washy wipers; drip beams, central lacking, fully expiring seats, new technology INFLUENCE steering, instead of the more traditional power steering, handbrake U-turn control, and with the hatchback open, there’s plenty of room for a quick up the dress fondle in a lay-by.

    The Rennard Buffuna comes in shades of “Yellow Peril, Cowardy Custard, Boring Beige, Straw man, Lemons and ‘would you like to Buff this, Miss-t?”

    The Rennard Buffuna: The car of yesteryear, today!

    Perfect for the politically aware young lady.
    Only £7,000 {+ Vat/ political donation, + EU bung total price = £28,000 or speak with the chief dealer who can probably ‘ come to some sort of accommodation?’}

  63. 63
    Steve Miliband says:

    He was in First Class, but that got downgraded as well

  64. 64
    Bumboy Dave says:

    Turned out nice again. Huskies being treated for sunstroke.

  65. 65
    Andy Burnham MP says:

    Yes, it’s a simple operation, we only had a 99% death rate when I was in charge. Shall book you in?

  66. 66
  67. 67
    Pink News says:

    “Press Office deals with media queries only”

    You should be quids in then Guido.

  68. 68
    Raving Loon says:

    It amazes me how much people “wank” on about Tory cuts, even though government spending is increasing.

  69. 69
    P l e b says:

    Will his Cardinalship get a huge payoff?

  70. 70
    Anonymous says:

    What does Equalities Minister Lynne Featherstone think about it all?

  71. 71
    Max from the grave Bygraves says:

    When it’s spring again
    I’ll bring again
    Tulips from Amsterdam

  72. 72
    genghiz the kahn says:

    No jokes about putting fingers in dykes.

  73. 73
    Sue Doughty says:

    Gone for a job interview?

  74. 74
    Young priest says:

    Buggered if I know.

  75. 75
    The Stafford Hospital Murdered Victims says:

    Resign Burnham.

  76. 76
    Vince Cable says:

    I used to drive a Mitsubishi Charisma but that was a long time ago

  77. 77
    Vince Cable says:

    I used to dr1ve a Mitsubishi Charisma but that was a long time ago

  78. 78
    Justice for Charlene Downes says:

    Seriously what’s so ‘beyond the pale’ about these views?

  79. 79
    BBC Cover Up says:

    In future please redact all BBC personnel names from your comments.

  80. 80
    Sandra in Accounts says:

    Very good Bill -

  81. 81
    anonymous says:

    is he following Leon Britten’s example?……when in a spot of bother, bugger off to Europe?

  82. 82
    Where are Tony Blair's expenses says:

    Give us a kiss

  83. 83
    British Broadcast Redaction Corporation says:

    Clegg, Rennard, that Catholic bloke that Guido dare not mention.
    These must all be exposed 24/7, we must have openness, clarity and above all the truth.
    Nothing must be redacted by any of them, that would be hypocrisy.

  84. 84
    Where are Tony Blair's expenses says:

    Nor is she conerned about the extra CO2 emissions from the flight.

    A typical BBC hypocrite

  85. 85
    Hang The B@stards says:

    Clearly there is nothing wrong with sexual harassment in Cleggy’s mind.

    He’s more bothered about getting his way on AV to be concerned about “trivial” issues of some bint getting touched up.

    Isnt that right Cleggy me boy.

    You just haven’t got the understanding of what is right or wrong.

  86. 86
    pissed off voter says:

    Must be an awful lot of lib dem sqeaky bums this fine day.

    Will career politician Swinson sacrifice her future and take one for the team? Or will she decide her career is more important than Clegg’s ass?

  87. 87
    Aaron D Highside says:

    …or look for a red herring. The BBC’s article by Nick Robinson, ‘Sex claims – who knew what?’ For a moment, I thought it was about Savile. Silly me.

  88. 88
    Cleggy says:

    I’m angry.
    I’m angry.
    I’m so so angry.
    There’s no easy way to say Nick Clegg is very angry.

  89. 89
    left wing, right wing, it's all the same bird! says:

    Thanks, who is no 1 then? i don’t have a clue i fear.

  90. 90
    Casual Observer says:

    It’s only the left who are going on about that, and confusing welfare transfers with new taxes.

    You are likely watching a little too much BBC. :-)

  91. 91

    He’s lining up a new job in the EU.

    Starting date – some time very soon.

  92. 92
    The Hague says:

    I don’t think there is anything strange about a man who is loyal to Holland going to see the Dutch Prime Minister instead of facing the British public

  93. 93
    General Sir Philip Michael Hunt says:

    Was Lynne Featherstone or any other current LimpDump Fembots vetted by Rennard?

  94. 94
    Rinka The Dog RIP says:

    Woof Woof

  95. 95
    Anonymong says:

    There are 3 number ones.

    Van Rompuy

  96. 96
    Nick (They call me "Nickers" 'coz I'm pants) Clegg MP says:

    Oh for the love of Christ, can’t a bloke swan off to Amsterdam for a little 420 now and then without everyone thinking it’s to do with avoiding having to deal with stories about a fat lecherous peer?

  97. 97
    genghiz the kahn says:

    #NickClegg must wish that the #LDs had copied the #BBC’s #Saville example & redacted all emails, tweets and letters @ #Rennardgate.

  98. 98
    Winnie the Pooh says:

  99. 99
    Vote UKIP -- Get rid of the LIBLABCONNERS says:

    With a bit of luck UKIP’s new Border Controllers will stop the fucker coming back on Friday.

  100. 100
    Casual Observer says:

    UKIP are a bit calmer.

    The problem with this party is the ‘nationalism’ bit.

    Incidentally, this lot are bouncing back a bit as they are being funded by the EU now. (As are most of the other extreme parties across the Eurozone)

  101. 101
    Dave and Gideon Wankers R Us says:

    Nick — come back at once — don’t leave Gideon ‘n me holding this stinking economic baby all on our own!

  102. 102
    Synic says:

    Rennard deserves a medal, no body else can face groping let alone screwing all those PPC Libdum Sapphics

  103. 103
    Snoopy says:

    Take that, Red Barosso.

  104. 104
    EU Watch says:

    !talian polls close at 14:00 GMT : So far voter turnout looks to be about 2-3% less than that in 2008.

  105. 105
    Edward. says:

    A bit of brown nosing in Brussels is the default defence mode for Clegg, he must assay to curry and keep favour at the court of Emperor Barroso – albeit in the seraglio.

  106. 106
    S Hughes says:

    I’ll give you a ring tonight

  107. 107
    D M Reader says:

    You could write an article on it for the Rag and earn more money, luv.

  108. 108
    Ted Moult says:

    Rutting season’s early this year.

  109. 109
    shurdy rover says:

    Flown to Amsterdam ON US of course!!

  110. 110
    yeah, right... says:

    Tax free, natch. Chin chin!

  111. 111
    Welsh activist. says:

  112. 112
  113. 113
    Helpful says:

    Is he eligible to be a Dutch MP?

  114. 114
    BBC politics is controlled by Labour says:

    Where’s Lord Oakeshott? Can’t he think of another reason to have a pop at the tories?

  115. 115
    Vote Diane James for Eastleigh! says:

    …or Dutch Caps!

  116. 116
    Vote Diane James for Eastleigh! says:

    Only if you want to speak to Vicky Pryce!

  117. 117
    Cardinal Sin says:

    Buggered if you don’t.

  118. 118
    Catty Comment (Ms) says:

    Not another by-election? So soon!

  119. 119
    Curly says:

    He’s just trying to move his Chinese New Year leftovers…

  120. 120
    Nigel Farage (thats faridge) says:

    If only

  121. 121
    Jayne says:

    Perhaps the craving got the better of him and he needed a hit of something stronger than nicotine. :)

  122. 122
    fella on the underground says:

    Whats a fat ugly fella supposed to do to get a bit of Legover.

    Cut Rennard some slack.

  123. 123
    S Berlesconi says:

    well said.

  124. 124
    The Real Lembit Opic says:

    Room for me then.

  125. 125
    Anonymous says:

    Flown in from Spain … the drama of it ! In the coffee bars its being said that Mrs Cleggie is leaning on Cleggie to quit … he’s even more puthy whipped than usual ! Pwick .

  126. 126
    Anonymous says:

    It is unclear where to find Spanish Practices out of hours ( as they say ) … Cleggie is more puthy whipped this evening than usual … go, man, go …

  127. 127
    @spcb says:

    I am no betting man but I’d stake my Ikea horse balls on the deputy PM being gone by the next conference season. But who would the LibDems choose next?

    He blocked the boundary reorganisation because he’d lose his seat in Sheffield. He’s waffled on about the C4 news broadcast on Rennard … and now done what all failing/failed Westminster politicos do: run to Europe. He’ll be in Brussels before you know it … on the gravy train. Nick Clegg … Ahhh, Bisto. Goes well with or without balls.

  128. 128
    blub says:

    and in what position?

  129. 129
    blub says:

    Did Rennard “vet” Clegg for the leadership position and what is the leadership position?

  130. 130
    Socialism = Starvation says:

    He’s off to record a special Stars in their Eyes politics edition.

    ‘Tonight Matthew, I’m going to be Peter Cetera singing The Glory of Love’. I am a man who will fight for your honor. Now ‘zen, now ‘zen.

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