February 22nd, 2013

POLL: Ditch Dave’s Regressive Alcohol Attack

The government’s proposal to introduce a minimum price of 50p per unit of alcohol is regressive taxation at its worst. It is an attack on both the poor and on the middle class, the seasoned drinker and the responsible drinker. For a “Conservative-led” coalition to implement a statist, anti-market, high tax raid is counter to the historic role of the Conservative Party. The joke that only the PM and Jeremy Heywood back the policy has more than a ring of truth to it.

This week Boris entered his champion of the people mode, bashing Dave for “hitting the poorest hardest” with minimum alcohol pricing. Osborne thinks it could actually cause a drop in takings from alcohol duty, and Theresa May, who is responsible for pushing it through, is said to be “cool”. Health minister Anna “Super” Soubry – as she is ironically known by her less than enamoured colleagues – admits responsible drinkers will be hit. Ken Clarke says it won’t work, James Brokenshire agrees it penalises everybody, even the LibDem minister Jeremy Browne isn’t on board. It is also worth noting that David Davis is a particularly strong opponent.

The Cabinet is against, but the PM is steam-rolling it through. You can tell Dave what you think in the poll below…


  1. 1
    Blowing Whistles says:

    nanny thinks she knows best


    • 4
      Spartacus says:

      scottish nannies have been trying to introduce this tax for some time now


      • 92
        Road_Hog says:

        It’s not a poll you need, to tell Cameron and all the supporters of this, it’s a ballot slip, at the county, EU and GE elections over the next two years.

        Fwck Dave, you’re well past your sell by date.


      • 145
        Rage Against the Poltical Elite says:

        If the Elitest’s are going to prop up their falling asset’s. They need to get the TAX up on Alcohol to PUSH more kids into taking illegal drugs.. Any one wonder where the Elite made all their money from Prohibition in the USA. Guess what its the Three Card trick and the People have their heads up their arses


    • 8
      Diane Abbotapotamus says:

      If by nanny you mean me then you are correct.


    • 25
      Blowing Whistles says:

      The emphasis to note is on the word “thinks” … because when politicians open up with the words I think / I believe – you can be damned well sure that a lie is going to follow.

      First! Hurrah – only 5000 or more and I can crow like wotisname?


      • 68
        yeah, right... says:

        They really do spout some absolute balls when it comes to ciggies and drink.

        I heard some DepHealth junior min telling his audience how his department’s measures were going to help another 500,000 people stop smoking.

        The audience lapped it up and applauded loudly but none of them thought to ask this cretin just how much more they were going to be taxed to make up the duty shortfall.


    • 51
      Bootlegger says:

      Will Billy Hague be paying this tax retrospectively?


    • 70
      Eight Ace says:

      Guess I’ll have to stand for Parliament if I still want cheap booze


    • 154
      Mike Litorus says:

      I’ll be brewing my own as usual.

      Suck on that you fucking dish faced cocksocket.


  2. 2
    Call me Dave says:

    I can’t have people taking it up the poo chute while to drunk to know what they are doing can I?


    • 10
      Uncle Joe says:

      Are you saying he’s cosmopolitan deviant? He does seem to wear a lot makeup. Even more reason to have him liquidated.


      • 76
        Sam's vajayjay says:

        The thing is, my Dave does get a bit frisky after a few drinks, so I’m in favour of anything that might calm him down.

        The other thing is, I wish he wasn’t so fond of the tradesman’s entrance: he says it’s an Oxford thing, but I’m not so sure.


        • 112
          Curly wonders says:

          I wonder what sort of reception he’ll get from the landlord and customers of that pub he inadvertently left his kids in a few weeks ago?


    • 14
      Hang Dave says:

      Would Sir like to try on this piano wire necktie? They are really cool.


    • 77
      A Drinker says:

      Guido, my old mate, I love you y’know, you’re my best mate in the whole world, eh? Aintcha? Thassright, you’re my best mate, but you know your problem? You know absolutely sod all about Westminshter and polticians eh? Thass your problem….


    • 83
      T'Old Fella says:

      My Geedo since when have you been a champion of the poor, you’usually decrying them calling them work dodgers etc. If you like booze so much, make it yourself if you can, I do, it ain’t exactly cheap cheap to get started but at least you know what goes into it


  3. 3
    Lord Rennard says:

    Fancy coming back to mine for a drink?


  4. 5
    Uncle Joe says:

    Another Gorbachev anti-drink campaign. Idiot, the workers need their drink and tobacco and the state needs the tax. I think you all know what needs to be done.


  5. 6
    Dave is a LibLabConner says:

    Come on Eastleigh — VOTE UKIP

    Message to Conservative M.P.s — DUMP DAVE NOW


  6. 7
    Henry Brubaker says:

    Why doesn’t Cameron just come out and admit his is a Liberal Democrat?

    He aint no Tory, he certainly isn’t Conservative.

    The again he aint liberal (well except for the gay marraige jigamy) and he aint democratic.

    As such he is definately perfect for the Limp Dems.


    • 16
      Blowing Whistles says:

      Isn’t he more israeli than anything else?


    • 17
      Casual Observer says:

      He’s a PC bastard


    • 27
      Gillian Beastley says:

      He’s perfect material for being a councillor in the scam that is my ‘Home of Environment Capital’.

      Just as long as he does as I say.

      And he should. Because even whilst he is employed in his present position, I still get paid more than he does.



    • 107
      T'Old Fella says:

      “and he aint democratic. ” No politician is really democratic they go through the farce of an election saying they will do this and do that and enforce the other and the just go their own sweet way


  7. 9
    SP4BS says:

    Problem drinkers lose the will to give a shit about their family, their health and their lives, anything

    I suppose in that sense a few more quid down the drain doesn’t matter that much, but its not going to be a deterrent.


    • 111
      T'Old Fella says:

      That is true an alcoholic is an addict in the same way a druggie is, they need help to come off it, but if they go back and have one alcoholic drink off they go again. Smoking (sorry Geedo) is an addiction, I used to smoke because it was making me ill I weened myself off them, in fact fags nowadays do not even smell like they used to do. If an addict wants to satisfy their craving they will thieve, steal, beg if they have no money.


      • 119
        Curly wonders says:

        Should he double the minimum wag then, do you think?


        • 121
          Curly wonders says:

          * wage


          • T'Old Fella says:

            Curly I don’t think so, but I do NOT think in these straightened times they shouldn’t pay for failure, with added bonuses. I do not have to mention the various scams that were run in businesses in the past and almost certainly will be in the future


  8. 11
    Oscar Pistolius says:

    Bail decision any moment for Pist of Fury.


  9. 12
    Point of Observation says:

    This will reduce the tax take on alcohol overall, and those who wish to consume and not pay will make their own. This could see an increase in methanol poisoning cases.


    • 18
      Point of Observation says:

      Not too mention it opens a path to organized crime for supplying cheaper liquor etc. Perhaps not just yet, but when alcohol duty next goes up following will be the tipping point.


      • 52
        Alphonse Capone, noted Chicago businessman, says:

        It was governmental interference with the citizen’s ability to have a snootful that made me the rich man I became, you know. Yeah yeah, you can talk about how less booze being consumed out there will cause less spending on NHS from chronic alcohol-related illnesses and dr!nk-dr!ving accidents and that you close a budget gap from both ends with a measure like this, but at the end of the day, literally, people are gonna want their two fingers of Scotch and a pint. Make it harder for them and you make it easier for a guy like me.


        • 89
          Uncle Joe says:

          He speaks the truth, much better to have a State monopoly of alcohol that gives the workers their Victory Gin and control the whole thing. Or you can just have mass executions of criminal boot leggers? Personally I’d do both.


          • T'Old Fella says:

            Psssst, there was a shop that was selling Wiskey cheap near where I used to trade many years ago, word got around up the stairs nudge nudge, wink wink, know what I mean cheap gin, rum etc as well. The “Wiskey” was 3 years old


  10. 13
    Boshy says:

    Just another nail in CaMorons coffin, he hasn’t got a fckn clue.


  11. 15
    Lord McAlpine says:

    Where can I get a good throat job in London this weekend?


    • 28
      Blowing Whistles says:

      there used to be a place years ago somewhere near Barnes – elm guest house or whatever it was?


    • 45
      Anonymous says:

      Alp the scalp.
      ….its the brutal world of every scalp for itself.
      ….or go baby milk….adult? ice.cream made from human mother milk ….genuine?
      ….or next time at shop… where someone in the queue for payment appreciates something you have bought…say good milk from jersey cows ….just give them a bottle on you… ppl are very taken aback …by random acts of kind generosity ..the english at heart are a generous soul.
      be generous.
      be kind.
      be random.


  12. 19
    Paniagua says:

    In case anyone was wondering, the Spanish for David Cameron is coño.


    • 66
      manuela says:

      the english, anti-coalition nazi party phrase for cameron is fucking shit for brains nazi doing as your masters tell you c’unt


  13. 20
    Anonymous says:

    Why do people drink more than ever? Because life is shit.


    • 24
      Point of Observation says:

      Of course we think we live in a democracy.

      But to think that and to live that are two very different things.


    • 34
      Blowing Whistles says:

      The Commies of old – used the old trick of making sure that a greater part of the population were always kept in a state of inebriation – rocket fuelled vodka.


      • 127
        T'Old Fella says:

        There was one which came Poland they called it Polish Spirit under the old system 140 proof. I think it very hard to come by now


  14. 21
    Alastair Campbell says:

    It’s too expensive to become tired and emotional these days.


  15. 22
    George Entwistle says:

    I’ve never heard of Jimmy Savile.


  16. 26
    Fed Up + Thirsty says:

    Tax, tax, tax, tax, tax.

    Why don’t they cut spending instead? Fire the worst performing 10% of public sector workers for a start.


    • 57
      Gideon Osborne says:

      Great idea!……. oh, hang on a minute…


    • 84
      Sir William Wade says:

      How can success be measured when nothing is produced?


    • 129
      Aunty Maud says:

      Wrong end. You need to start with the top 1500 and work down from there, starting with complete useless departments eg Culture, Yoof and whatever else is tagged on this week, followed by Defra, then Business and Trade.

      Do that this weekend and by the end of March we’ll all be quids in and on the way to recovery.


    • 135
      T'Old Fella says:

      They could make a start on the number of mps and the numbers in the HoL, cut subsidised meals, booze, hospitality, then start on the numbers of hanger-ons, mps should always travel by public transport when going to and from the HoC (they expect everyone else to) second class of course, if they want to travel 1st class they pay extra, travelling to various constituent meeting at a rate of 30p/mile. I will not hold my breath because it will not happen


  17. 29
    White Hat Geek says:

    Anyone wanting to convert the pollard report release back to single page pdf docs so the text can be extracted may be interested in this:



  18. 31
    Muzzie Patroller says:

    So if consumption of alcohol consumption goes down, the muzzie patrols can focus fully on homosexuals. Cool.


  19. 32
    Sally *wipesmouth* says:

    Who cares, I’m still rich enough to YOLO with the young conservatives.


  20. 33
    Bogstandard says:

    Why not regulate betting shops with fixed terminal betting machines, if you really want to do something for the poor? Recent stats from Campaign for fairer gambling says huge numbers of shops set up in poorest areas. Machines in most deprived city collected £270 million over a single year – average of about £900,000 per machine! Nice little tax earner to actually help the poor


    • 60
      London says:

      + 1

      Bettng shops should need a licence from local authorities renewable every six months: refusal of licence should be unappealable. No more than one betting shop within 400m of one another.


  21. 36
    The Major says:

    More Gin Fawlty!


  22. 37
    Red Egg Millitit.....National Socialist. says:

    Voting ‘no’ is like turkeys voting for Christmas……. unless you are of a certain religion or an abstainer :)


  23. 40
    Greggs Spokesperson says:

    We are pleased to confirm the traces of Mule and Ass found in one of our shops was eradicated when the manager asked Tom Watson and John Prescott to leave.


  24. 42
    8 Ace says:

    Less micro chip for t’Bairns.


  25. 43
    Geordieboy says:

    Screw the people Dave and they will screw you, your days are numbered. Will some responsible “Conservative ” MP please start collecting the 47 signatures required to remove this arsehole.


  26. 47
    BBC Spokesperson says:

    Hopefully when we oust Cameron we’ll still have a few bottles of Champagne rolling around in the corridors.


  27. 49
    Anonymous says:

    if i can’t afford to continue drinking away this nightmare government then i’ll have to resort to rioting. On a serious note, this will just increase the size and scope of the black market trade in cheap/fake booze


  28. 50
    Friday Caption Fan says:

    That’s a nice photo of Cameron enjoying a pint of Nick Clegg’s Pi$$


  29. 55
    Eddie Bollox says:

    BREAKING NEWS: Met police chief suspended for whistle blowing!


  30. 56
    David Icke says:

    Lizards do not drink alcohol


  31. 58
    pissed off voter says:

    Be fair guys, Dave needs this extra tax to support the Indian space program.


  32. 59
    Jimmy says:

    So the bright idea is to impose a tax in effect only not actually collect it.

    It’s certainly a novel idea.


    • 73
      Starbucks says:

      Whats wrong with that?


    • 78

      Taxation should be confined to the minimum necessary to conduct the state’s unavoidable affairs and not a penny more.

      Taxes should never be used in an attempt to change people’s behaviour.

      Any tax which does cause a general shift in behaviour is probably a bad one.


      • 93
        Jimmy says:

        I disagree. Once one establishes that taxation is necessary then it seems only common sense to tax activity you wish to discourage in preference to activity you wish to promote.


        • 97
          The Public says:

          Then why don’t we tax MPs expenses?


        • 100

          The problem here Jimmy is who constitutes the you?

          My desires to discourage activities will doubtless be different to yours. Which of us is deemed to be right?


          • Jimmy says:

            I suspect you know my answer and that this is where we will differ. You appear to advocate a taxation system (however minimal) entirely value free. I’m struggling to picture what that would mean in practice. Surely any system of taxation will reflect the philosophy of those who impose it?


          • Anarchists In Blazers says:

            Basically Jimmy is happy to use any means to bully us in to doing what he deems to be right. His arguments won’t persuade us. But he’ll be able to convince himself that that’s because we’re stupid.


          • Jimmy says:

            You’re too kind. I doubt I could do so without your help.


          • @ Jimmy. You are correct in your initial observation. We are right back to Hume’s Fork. The praxeology should exclude personal value judgements and only consider economic ones. I accept you would not agree here but that is not the end of it.

            Your final proposition is valid when one views it through the mathematical perspective that zero is a number.

            Addressing the point which probably troubles you most, you would surely find that ethics can sustain itself very well without the dubious aid of taxation (of which, incidentally, I am not calling for the complete abolition.)

            Sorry, but have been dealing with some pressing matters in the real world so realise you may never see this…


  33. 62
    Nanny Tax wot is it good? Nuffink absolutely Nuffink says:

    Dave and his Booze Tax is no better than Abbott and her Sugar tax.


  34. 63
    Ditch Dumb Deviant Dave says:

    What has Cameron got against booze, is he a secret moz like Galloway?


  35. 64
    excuse me says:

    if I build a distillation unit to make my peach snaps what the fuck has it got to do with you ?


  36. 69
    Nancy Boy says:

    So let’s get this straight. Dave is the shirtlifters friend and the drinking man’s enemy.


    • 95
      The Public says:

      Pretty much correct, though quite a lot of booze gets drunk by the staff of ‘aid’ agencies as they enjoy their tax free salaries in five star hotels overseas.


  37. 72
    Sir William Wade says:

    As long as I can still get a decent bottle of claret for less than twenty quid I shan’t worry. Bit of a problem for lager-swilling youths and alkies though.


  38. 74
    tube_thumper says:

    I think Pistorius may get bail.

    As the magistrate just said.

    Durely everyone has woken up legless on valentines day, shot all over the wifes face and thought it was someone else?


  39. 75
    rebekah aka nellnewman says:

    Dave needs to be careful – wine is a favourite tipple amongst the tory blue rinse brigade – this tax will hit his own voters most and it’ll do absolutely nothing to stop binge drinking on the streets by youngsters.


    • 82
      Sam's vajayjay says:

      I can’t say I’m that surprised – my Dave has taken a few wrong turnings in his time.


    • 94
      Moussa Koussa Mark 6 says:

      TYPICAL !!!!!!!

      No Neo Nut 99% of all adults like a tipple every now and then. Unlike Guido who is smashed most of the time ( oh yes he is )

      So Dave and co are pi*ssing us ALL off, not juts his coffin dodgers


      • 116
        yawn says:

        If you laid off the Buckie Moussa, you might manage to string a coherent sentence together?
        But then again..


  40. 80
    Moussa Koussa Mark 6 says:

    Poor Guido… are you still on the sauce. Dont forget Guido – you cant dri*nk and dri*ve….has your ban lapsed yet


  41. 81
    Oscar Pistolious says:

    This fucking magistrate is really milking the attention he’s getting. He knows the case is getting worldwide coverage, so he’s stretching out his statement to an interminable length instead of just saying what his decision is.


  42. 85
    Londoner says:

    Let’s face it. Our government has completely lost sight of the fact they are supposed to be governing by consent.


  43. 88
    old SHEP says:

    Whatever happened to the free market, another nanny state vanity project which clobbers the ordinary people with yet more stealth tax increases yet they see fit to subsidise their own boozy ways in the HOC with a massive state subsidy, Heir to Blair indeed.


  44. 96
    just askin says:

    This isnt an EU guideline by any chance, is it?


  45. 98
    Moussa Koussa Mark 6 says:




    • 105
      Sam's vajayjay says:

      We don’t know anyone with a diesel car – my Dave says they’re a bit common.

      Nasty, smelly and loud – a bit like that Sally Bercow.


  46. 104
    EU Funded Pro-EU Troll says:

    Vote UKIP.


  47. 108
    Tom Caxton says:

    £2.20 is more than enough for a can of Special Brew.


  48. 110
    Tiny Tom says:

    I don’t mind booze costing more as long as someone else buys it for me.


  49. 114
    Dino says:

    Dave always knows best, only listens to those who agree with him. He is arrogance personified. Add that to the fact that his job is to destroy the Tory brand, which he is doing brilliantly.


  50. 125
    Anonymous says:

    Who Jeremy Heywood?


  51. 131
    NeilMc says:

    If blokes are forced to drink less, how are ugly chicks going to get laid?


  52. 132
    Anonymous says:

    No surprise after the judge wittered on for so long-Bail granted.


  53. 136
    Oops, Guildo is not quite right says... says:

    Sorry to be boring despite being an avid Guido fan…but I respectfully disagree with him on this one. I work for a charity that helps alcoholics, but enjoy moderate drinking myself. MUP as it is called the Min Unit Price is widely misunderstood and misrepresented.

    Alcohol is sold by strength and by quantity and so stronger drinks will become more expensive.

    A unit price of 50p would mean:
    A can of lager could not cost less than £1,
    A pint of beer less than £1.50
    A bottle of wine could not cost less than £4.50
    A 70cl bottle of spirits £14

    These prices are still lower than those in most pubs but it is not difficult to find prices lower than these in supermarkets and off licenses.

    The target of a MUP for alcohol is the low cost high strength alcohol which is not drunk for pleasure or with meals but is consumed to get drunk.

    It will protect pubs and quality drinks

    It will target the nasty cheap booze beloved of alcoholics and sold in off licences and supermarkets often at heavy discount

    Boring but true.

    Shame to let the facts get in the way of a good story…


    • 156
      SaxonSid says:

      Fuck off you khunt

      alcohol is already price through the roof because of tax

      we should tax khuntslike you at £3000 per word


    • 160
      Anonymous says:

      Having spoken to many (often street-homeless) alcohol dependent individuals, I have to agree with some of the principles of MUP. As far as I can see it the alcohol that will be made more expensive by MUP is the cheap nasty stuff that destroys the bodies (and sometimes minds) of desperate people who need to get drunk cheaply and quickly. I am aware alcohol dependecy and related issues are a much greater social issue which MUP can not solve, however, for those who are on the edge of a life ravaged by alcohol misuse surely MUP will help hold them back from taking that step..?


  54. 139
    Jimbo says:

    So he prefers to put tax on beer and not cannabis, I wonder why ?

    Isn’t it time that the Conservative MP’s got rid of this ridiculous and utter twerp and replaced him with someone who can look credible for the next election, why not David Davis ? if they do not get rid of Dave (The Socialist) very soon there will be a great number of Conservative MP’s looking for another job after the election. Next week could see the Conservative vote hit hard by Ukip and rightfully so. It is time for the Conservative Party to wake up, smell the coffee and realise that Dear old Blitherer Dave is working all out to demolish the Conservative Party forever, I cannot understand why they have not worked it out by now.


  55. 146
    Prophylactic Pete says:

    OK, let ca-moron increase the tax on booze ONLY if one of 2 things happen:

    1. Hell freezes over
    2. The taxpayer funded subsidies on alcohol served in the houses of parliament are reduced to £0.00

    Pete says,
    “A johnny a day keeps the population at bay”


  56. 147
    The savant 10.4 highway patrol says:

    Simple. Solution

    Reclassify one unit of alcohol as equating to either a pint of beer or a bottle of wine or spirits .

    Ergo everything will cost. 50 p and th new law will be welcomed with open arms. — if not quite open legs at least not for the first few. Downers.


  57. 153
    Steve P says:


    clicked the image and it went straight to “thank you for voting”


  58. 157
    Rush-is-Right says:

    Could this be the first occasion in my lifetime when Ken Clarke has been right about something?


  59. 159
    Anonymous says:

    We’ll end up with cheap hooch on every street corner.


  60. 161
    Anonymous says:

    Having spoken to many (often street-homeless) alcohol dependent individuals, I have to agree with some of the principles of MUP. As far as I can see it the alcohol that will be made more expensive by MUP is the cheap nasty stuff that destroys the bodies (and sometimes minds) of desperate people who need to get drunk cheaply and quickly. I am aware alcohol dependecy and related issues are a much greater social issue which MUP can not solve, however, for those who are on the edge of a life ravaged by alcohol misuse surely MUP will help hold them back from taking that step..?


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