February 21st, 2013

Great Questions of Our Time

The vice chairman of the Conservative Party, ladies and gentlemen:

Things are busy in Eastleigh then…


135 Comments

  1. 1
    Call me Dave says:

    Pop round tonight and I will show you.

    Like

  2. 2
    What's with the bizarre hairdo, Mike? says:

    Because Suck Job means one who sucks at their job. Rather like you as an MP, Mr FabriHunt.

    Like

  3. 3
    Captain Dogseye says:

    Great Questions of Our Time:- Who killed Maddie McCann

    Like

  4. 4
    Sally Bercow says:

    I never spit.

    Like

  5. 5
    Gary Jones says:

    He is right,if you are blowing,you are doing it wrong…….or is he talking about Stacking shelves?

    Like

  6. 7
    Pawn Sandwich says:

    Because you can claim for “blow” on expenses but not for “suck”.

    Like

    • 99
      Anonymous says:

      Didn’t Fabricant take an unmarked jar of “Coffee Mate” with him on a walking tour of Colombia a few years ago? He couldn’t understand why the authorities were so interested by the white powder in his rucksack.

      Like

  7. 8
    The Right Honourable George Osborne says:

    Boris was the first choice for appearing in the One Direction single, after a few discussions it was decided that Dave should do it.

    Boris will have his moment to shine at a later date.

    Like

    • 15
      Eu Referendum says:

      Dancing with Buck Fizz for the EU referendum while singing Making your mind up. Bojo rips off his trousers and reveals his silky shorts. Phwoar!

      Like

  8. 9
    SP4BS says:

    Just so you can get on with sorting out those bookings and diary clashes.

    I believe its related to “moby dick” and to the idea that one shouts “there she blows” when seeing a spurt of foamy stuff.

    Like

    • 110
      Bill d'Sarse says:

      I believe it comes from ‘blowsy’, a Victorian slang term for prostitute.

      Before you ask – no, that’s not from personal experience, I’m old, but not that old.

      Like

  9. 10
    Lard Prescott says:

    I do it with pies

    Like

  10. 11
    Lord Stansted says:

    Off-topic, for which I apologise.

    The Guardian is charging £400 for a web-buiding course.

    http://www.guardian.co.uk/guardian-masterclasses/building-websites-html-css-javascript-course?INTCMP=MASARETRRH285

    Jesu – don’t they know, all the how-to-do html, java script, css, etc., etc. is available for free on something called the Internet.

    Like

  11. 12
    Why Aye says:

    Historic Court Case Against the BBC’s Cover Up of 9/11 Evidence

    http://www.globalresearch.ca/historic-court-case-against-the-bbcs-cover-up-of-911-evidence/5322983

    Like

    • 25
      Moussa Koussa Mark 6 says:

      YEAH YEAH YEAH !!!! Now the BBC are involved in a 9/11 cover up.

      YOU NEO NUTS ARE STARTING TO GO NUTTER !!!!!!

      Like

    • 50
      Dave says:

      No it’s not, it’s a guy being taken to court for not paying his TV licence. The magistrate will laugh him out of court given that his defence appears to be that it would be unlawful to pay his TV licence because he thinks the BBC sponsors terrorism… Bonkers.

      Like

  12. 13
    Point of Information says:

    According to the Google, proper fellat!o requires a relaxed throat. To suppress the gag reflex and relax it is normal to exhale.

    Some things should not be asked on Twitter.

    Like

  13. 16
    Heterosexual Question of Our Time says:

    How many beers should a red blooded male consume before attempting to pull Laur!e Penny ? If successful, should he then tell his mates ?

    Like

  14. 19
    Anonymous says:

    With daves A team in Eastleigh what can possibly go wrong?

    Like

  15. 20
    RoP says:

    I read with interest (but no surprise) this, at the end of the Standard’s report on the latest adventures of our peaceful bomb-making brethren:
    “Nobody in the plotters’ community tipped police off with concerns, despite finding out they were sending young men to terror training camps in Pakistan. The three will be sentenced in April and May.”

    Like

  16. 21
    A BBC Weather presenter says:

    This is the twat who became twoutraged when he was asked if he’d paid for the poppy wreath he said he was going to lay at last year’s remembrance service. Man’s an idiot.

    Like

  17. 22
    Heywood Jablome says:

    Did someone call ?

    Like

  18. 27
    Lard Pressclott of Beams, Bellies, Banjos, Bulimia, two bog seats, two Jags & Shags. says:

    Great Questions of Our Time.

    Who’s eaten all the pies ??

    Like

  19. 28
    Moussa Koussa Mark 6 says:

    HAS GUIDO BEEN LISTED IN THE HMRC TAX AVOIDERS LIST ?????

    Like

  20. 29
    Anonymous says:

    Reminds me of the unluckiest man in the world who crossed a cock-roach with a blood-sucker and got a blood-roach…boom boom. I’ll start the car.

    Like

  21. 43
    Your Friendly Neighbourhood Cheesy Dialogue From 1940's Films Service says:

    “There are some things it were better you did not ask, my friend; I knew someone like you, who was inquisitive, and asked whatever was on his mind– I haven’t seen him since the Gestapo came to his house a while back. In this land we have learned not to ask questions…”

    Like

  22. 45
    Great political question of our time says:

    Why is Blair still free?

    Like

  23. 51
    QT says:

    Tonight’s Question Time panel should provide some fireworks:

    Michael Heseltine, Vince Cable, Diane Abbot, Amanda Platell

    Like

  24. 52
    Loosing em faster than Eastleigh voters says:

    Like

  25. 54
    Incapable Vince says:

    Don’t leave your mansions unlocked.

    Like

  26. 56
    This week's Popbitch newsletter says:

    Spotted in Tom Baker’s supermarket trolley:

    * Champagne
    * Gu puds
    * Organic bits and bobs
    * Premium catfood in tiny tins
    * Bushmills whiskey
    * Rainforest Alliance chocolate
    * The Daily Mail (for which he
    apologised “Ah well, it’s full
    of spiteful rubbish, but the
    Guardian just puts me into a
    coma.”)

    Like

  27. 60
    Alice Springs Tinker Horton says:

    It depends which end of the Hoover you connect the hose to, as to whether it will be a “suck job” or a “blow job,” doesn’t it? Remind me never to hire you to vacuum-clean my carpets, you silly, silly man! You’re almost as bad as Vicar Grainger, with your questions that make no sense!

    Like

  28. 78
    Learn to Count with Ed Balls says:

    Today we’ll cover addition.

    One plus one is two,
    two plus one is nine,
    nine plus one is four,
    four plus one is eleventeen.

    So who wants to tell me what eleventeen plus one is…?

    Like

  29. 80
    Airey Belvoir says:

    Great questions of our time;

    1. Why can’t we tickle ourselves?

    2. When does David Blunkett know when to stop wiping his bum?

    Like

    • 88
      old SHEP says:

      Good points, why do Elephants weigh 2 tons when they only eat salad?.

      Like

      • 132
        Just passing through says:

        In the early days of the telly (1950s) there was a prog featuring the best comedians of the day (Ted Ray and a few others) providing answers to daft questions such as those posted here. The only one I can remember was: Why does water come out of the tap all rolled up”. So long ago I can’t recall what the responses were.

        Like

    • 92
      Bert says:

      3. Does he know he’s black?

      Like

    • 108
      P l e b says:

      Great Questions Of Our Time:

      How did George Osborne get to be Chancellor?

      Like

  30. 84
    Brown out and pay me damages. He can take his thick as pig shit, scrounging, ugly fudds with him. I want nothing to do with the pathetic lying fuck. says:

    Suck jobby at the BBC.

    Like

  31. 85
    Sally Bercow says:

    My job is to suck :)

    Like

  32. 94
    Jimmy says:

    The Conservative Party: Leaving a bad taste in the mouth since 1832.

    Like

  33. 95
    Ed Miliband is not laughing now says:

    Mansion tax to be lowered to properties valued at 1.8 million.

    Like

  34. 102
    Gordon Brown says:

    I’ve been experimenting with blowing water up my bottom using a bit of hose pipe

    Like

    • 114
      HMV says:

      There’s a turkey baster in the kitchen.

      Like

      • 126
        gordon brown says:

        she only lets me have a plastic jug and my bit of hose. I would like access to the taps but I am not allowed, sometimes I make the water all brown ( hee hee) looking and I discovered that I can make large drawings of cocks on my walls with this liquid, which I find tremendously exciting, I don’t know why.

        Like

  35. 109
    Sloth says:

    No members of Mrs Thatcher’s Cabinet arrested yet?

    Like

    • 118
      Psycho alert says:

      There’s something very creepy about your lot’s obsession with kiddy-fiddling

      Like

      • 125
        hand standing panda says:

        I think it is something to do with “normal” folk being concerned that the people who have achieved power are a clan of perverts

        Like


Seen Elsewhere

Ruffley Must Go | Guardian
Political Correctness Breeds Extremism in Schools | Chris McGovern
Ruffley Faces Crisis Meeting | ITV
I Sang “Maggie Out” (When I Was 7) | Liz Truss
UKIP Have Learnt How to Street Fight | Dr Rob Ford
Now Labour Want to Tax Sports Betting | BBC
Farage: Dave, Griffin, Rory, Lord Ashcroft, Beer & Fags | Sun
Ruffley Lawyers Issue Apology | Standard
Dave Donor’s Husband is Putin Crony | Mail
UKIP Reshuffles | James Forsyth
David Ruffley’s Future Under Discussion by Tories | BBC


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New Foreign Secretary Philip Hammond has big ambitions in his first meeting with Benjamin Netanyahu today:

“I came to bring this conflict to an end.”



Flight Watch says:

Russia Today is a cauldron of bullsh*t. The only people that take it seriously are deluded conspiracy theorists. Other RT journos have resigned citing the same reasons.

It’s about as believable as Press TV, KCNA of North Korea or the Daily Mirror.


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