February 14th, 2013

Dave’s Dinner and Ed’s ‘Surprise’

With Nick Clegg away somewhere, sadly we won’t learn what he is getting up to tonight for Valentine’s evening, but news of the other two party leaders has trickled out. Dave told an audience on the Eastleigh stump today that he had not done “that well at Valentine Day this morning”, so he is apparently cooking for Sam at the No.10 flat. Meanwhile Ed will be having a Chinese takeaway at his mansion in Primrose Hill. He told the Guardian that he would be catching up on BBC drama The Hour, adding sinisterly “There may also be a surprise.” Lets hope it’s a better costed one than his tax plan today…


  1. 1
    EU calling all horses says:

    Who really cares what these people are doing for Valentines day we end up paying for it anyway.

    How about a better idea, lets stop paying all the MP’s and Lords and money saved, put it towards repairing the third world sh*thole roads we travel on.

  2. 2
    Steve Miliband says:

    Justine, the kids are going to Eton.

  3. 3
    Lol says:

    One surprise for Ed would be if his missus mistook him for an intruder.

  4. 4
    Steve Miliband says:

    Justine, you remember Gordon and Sarah? They’ve flown in from Scotland for the night.

  5. 5
    Ed Millibland (Prince Philip edition) says:

    I did not say Surprise, I said Supplies

    and If you stay here much longer you’ll all be slitty-eyed

  6. 6
    Tom Watson says:

    If anyone is interested I am doing SFA tonight.

  7. 7
    foxtrot oscar says:

  8. 8
    Husband about as much use as a chocolate fireguard says:

    Pity Valentine’sw Day coincides with me starting the 5:2 diet for Lent.
    So, no dining out and no booze. OTOH I did buy her a bunch of roses and sent her a card.

  9. 9
    Ed Millibland says:

    Yes that’s a portion of ‘Fuk Dem proles’ and a side of ‘Rats Nest Soup’.

    Oh and a portion of ‘Lik Mein’ for the wife.

  10. 10
    Gordon Brown says:

    We’ve brought the pyjamas

  11. 11

    for Ed: Horse Balls in Chilli Sauce with Skewers

  12. 12
    old SHEP says:

    Hows about another St Valentines Day massacre?, (sorry not really entering into the spirit of the thing).

  13. 13
    True story says:

    I once knew a shotputter that could put an apple up his arse

  14. 14
    Lord Mandelspawn - Lizard International says:

    If you stuck a spark plug up my arse I used to say ‘Champion’

  15. 15
    old SHEP says:

    Two Dim Sons.

  16. 16
    Prez 45 says:

    My name is Hillary Clitflicker and I approve of this message.

  17. 17
    Westminster Gossip says:

    The big question for 2015…

    Are we better off in 2015 than we were in 2010 and would we be better off in 2020 under a Lab/Lib pact than a Con/Lib pact?

    Should we give Labour another chance to govern when have not demonstrated any contrition for the last mess?

    While Milliband makes fun of Cameron at PMQs he also makes us laugh at his suggestion that we would be better off under Labour…

    I still think Cameron got the GAY marriage issue wrong but he has got the swivel eyed Euro nuts on the run!

  18. 18
    Sir Keith Joseph's Preserved Head says:

    What a day to launch your “vision” !

    As Harold Macmillan said “events dear boy events!”

  19. 19

    That would truly be awful.

    The more especially with a gun ban.

  20. 20
    Catty Comment (Ms) says:

    Omelette and chips with a cheeky Chateau Neuf on the side?

  21. 21
    Gonk III says:

    Granny smith or golden delicious.

  22. 22
    Paniagua says:

    Ed should order a portion of ‘Sum Ting Wong’

  23. 23
    Sir Keith Joseph's Preserved Head says:

    or even… Is this a good day to bury bad news?

  24. 24

    …or in Andy Burnham’s case, a St Valentines Day’s Mascara.

  25. 25

    Ed: “I’ve got a big surprise for you Justine. I think I can manage another one.”

    Justine ” What? Really? Twice? You can manage two in a day?”

    Ed: Yep..I can feel it growing..I think..I think…I’m ready for another policy announcemnet!”

  26. 26
    m says:

    spot on Q

  27. 27
    keredybretsa says:

    Valentines Day Suppers. Horse Hamburgers with chips, peas and a side salad for Dave and Horse chop suey with bean sprouts for Ed. Ain’t it loving and doving?

  28. 28
    the ballsup kids roll along.. says:

    at five paces with yvette the impaler

  29. 29
    Tay King-dePisse says:

    You’re a contemptible liar.
    Fanny Adams wouldn’t touch you with a bargepole, Fat Bastard!
    But I’m sure YOU’LL be touching a “pole,” of sorts– if something that short can properly be called one…

  30. 30
    Dick Turpintine says:

    never did know where that horse went

  31. 31
    Andy Burnham says:

    Good idea. Could make a killing on the NHS.

  32. 32
    local vet says:

    I think you’re witnessing the contrition in dumping brown … risible suggestion that they both said no laughable

  33. 33
    Sarah knows best.. says:

    you remind him gordon

  34. 34
    Brown out and pay me damages. says:

    Ed Miliband is a twat and his wife is an ugly cow. Do something with that mop of hers. She looks like an old crusty greenie.

  35. 35
    bunterwatch says:

    it wheezes

  36. 36
    Abdel from Tooting says:

    So Mr Cameron is actually cooking in that expensive kitchen we have all paid for.

    There was of course nothing wrong with using the previous kitchen in these austere times especially as that one too had cost us taxpayers a pretty penny .

    Keep sending us mugs the bills.

  37. 37
    Rinka Scott says:

    Beware the dog that barks !

  38. 38
    Owen Patterson is useless says:

    I cannot explain despite running a multibillion pound Department just how horse meat got into those beef lasagnes.

  39. 39

    I too would like a mansion as a reward for my services to socialism.

    Doesn’t have to be Primrose Hill. Notting Hill will do.

  40. 40
    Albert hall says:

    Agreed, Ed’s lips look a bit odd, like a grouper sucking in a little fish.

  41. 41
    Jimmy says:

    Sam’s a lucky lady. Can’t be many wives getting a supper which normally retails for 25k.

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