February 14th, 2013

Come Fly With Gordon

Last year the jet-setting Prime Mentalist came under fire for blowing taxpayers’ cash on flights from Scotland to London. Though most Scottish MPs take the train south of the border, Guido learns that over just a three-month period last summer Brown claimed almost £6,000 on expenses for air travel from Scotland to the capital. That despite not speaking in the House for a year.

Incidentally, in the last month he has declared over £320,000 in cash from speeches and advisory work that definitely goes to towards the full running costs of his office, and the rest he totally gives away to charity. With his once loyal lieutenants twisting the knife today and running for the hills, isn’t it time Gordon took the hint?  


  1. 1
    Casual Observer says:

    Gordon is damaged goods.

  2. 2
    Sarah Canterbury says:

    Leave my husband, as per Section II Paragraph VI of our contract, alone.

  3. 3
    Anonymous says:

    “Twat Watch”?

  4. 4
    Mrs Brown says:

    This man is a fecking disgrace.

  5. 5
    Jimmy So Vile says:

    Hello its me and Gordon

  6. 6
    Gordon Brown says:

    Hoots mon, can ya no hear the pipes?

  7. 7
    EU calling all horses says:

    Don’t they still check the receipts for these expenses, he’s the same tw$t made sure you had to dot the I and cross the T even with real receipts you were lucky to get repaid, time for his to be checked by the HMRC and not just passed by because he’s a Liebour friend or ex PM he’s now a zero a nothing,

  8. 8
    Ed Balls - Shallow Chancer says:

    Who’s Gordon Brown ?

  9. 9
    Moron Brown says:

    I met Oscar Pistorius at the Olympics last year.

  10. 10
    Plumbline says:

    He certainly damaged this country.

  11. 11
    Tom Watson - Gordons Praetorian says:

    Who’s Ed Balls?

  12. 12
    Gordon Brown says:

    He had such a spring in his step.

  13. 13
    Ed Balls - Shallow Chancer says:

    I’ve never known a Gordon Brown.

  14. 14
    Lord Mandelbum of Fondleboys says:

    If it wasn’t for Gordon Brown’s huge enthusiasm for increasing the APD tax (first introduced by the lamentable Norman Lamont) flying from Scotland to London would still be cheaper than going by train – there used to be 28 flights a day from LHR to Glasgow with a choice of two airlines – now there is less than half that, with just the former state monopoly operating the route.

    Having said that, all the excessive security applied to air travel these days renders the train a much more pleasant experience. Working wifi also helps a lot.

    Still, I expect Gordon Brown enjoys having his orifices vetted by the rubber glove toting securitate at the airport!

  15. 15
    Ed Balls - Shallow Chancer says:

    I’m certain I’m never had anything to do with any person called Gordon Brown.

  16. 16
    Lord Mandelbum of Fondleboys says:

    Posters of Youtube videos, even this excellent Gordon Brown tribute anthem, are morons too.

  17. 17
    Tre Torr says:

    Gordon said to Ed, “Truly I say to you that this very night, before a cock crows, you shall deny Me three times “

  18. 18
    Come on Dave put the Boot in you fucking wimp says:

  19. 19
    Gordon Brown says:

    I always knew, ever since I shook his hand that he would shoot to fame.

  20. 20
    Having a blast says:

    …and he was off like a shot when the pistol fired!

  21. 21
    The Cock says:

    Fuck off you bedwetting lefties

  22. 22
    Casual Observer says:

    If it wasn’t for the dodgy dossier, the security at air ports would likely not need to be so intrusive either.

    One can only wonder at what he is troughing from the UN.

  23. 23
    The Two Eds says:

    We promise to increase the tax rate for the poor from 0% today to 10% in a future Labour government.

    Ows about that then?

  24. 24
    Gordon Brown, Saviour of the World says:

    You wouldn’t want me to be dr!ving eight hours on the motorway, me with my dead eye, would you, you daft buggers?

  25. 25
    old SHEP says:

    Can’t see what the problem is, after all he is a registered charity, I frequently put the odd coin into one of his pot effigies when passing through the shopping mall.

  26. 26
    Oscar Pistolius says:

    I’ll do him for a price.

  27. 27
    Rastatrout says:

    The country’s going to ratshit in a handcart and you worry about Gordon Brown’s philanthropy?

  28. 28
    I was never in the IRA either says:

    Its becoming fashionable.

    Our own dear Demi God St Gerry (I was never in the IRA) Adams has recently been outed. having a bit of the old prostrate problem. Rather than get surgery in a smelly NHS hospital among the plebs who used to vote for him, a multi-millionaire supporter flew him business class and all expenses paid to a clinic in the USA where he had laser surgery done at a cost of £25k paid by said American

    St Gerry now declares that he had to do this as the laser surgery wasn’t available in the UK – which may be a bit of a shock to all those who have had it

    Still isn’t it great that us little people have such leaders to look up to

  29. 29
  30. 30
    Raving Loon says:

    UK prime ministers:

    Cameron: wet social democrat who couldn’t get a majority against Gordo
    Gordon Brown: the prime mentalist, possibly violent sociopath
    Blair: war criminal
    Major: Maastrict
    Thatcher: last conservative leader
    Callaghan: winter of discontent
    Wilson: continued EU treason
    Heath: traitor

  31. 31
    corridor of uncertainty says:

    Who the hell paid him £320k for speeched and advice?

  32. 32
    Rastatrout says:

    You missed out ‘child molester’

  33. 33
    Look on the bright side says:

    Well at least he’s probably firing blanks now and that’s the end of the dynasty.

  34. 34
    corridor of uncertainty says:

    AAHHH, just figured it out. Pay him for the advice (eg when do I sell my gold?) then do the complete opposite. Money well spent.

  35. 35
    The Public says:

    There is no political masterstroke. The tax system is so convoluted as to be virtually unworkable.

    Miliband is a Mong.

    Vote UKIP.

  36. 36
    SP4BS says:

    The prostrate provides “the gunpowder”. so he won’t be firing anything at all.

  37. 37
    Anonymous says:

    Gordon gave advice to HMV, Blockbuster and Jessops.

  38. 38
    Panigua says:

    I think you need to look simpler for the source of his bungs, he is not that clever. Anyone looked at Marigolds turnover over the last 15 years?

  39. 39
    Uncle Joe says:

    I’ll do him for nothing and the Turkey Baster wife.

  40. 40
    Gordon Brown says:

    Wasn’t the Arctic Monkeys last hit also ‘The Girlfriend’?

  41. 41
    Gordon Brown says:

    With +0% growth

  42. 42
    Ed Miliband says:

    Me next! as endorsed by UKIP!

  43. 43
    Uncle Joe says:

    I could show him what gunpowder can do. And clear that vipers nest you’ve let breed in that last bit of your Empire.

  44. 44
    Gordon Brown ..the never forgotten years...period says:

    birdshit boy was at my knee where were you chatternuts ?

  45. 45
    Gordon the medicated says:

    That little shit Miliband.
    After all i’ve done for him. He’d still be carrying Tony’s files to the shredder and cleaning Balls’ shoes if it wasn’t for me.

    The ungrateful turdfaced assbuket. Ohhhhh I’m so furious I’m going to…I’m going to…fly down there and smack him one.

    Right..lets see…flight goes at 7.45pm ..takes 1 hour + check in. And then I’ll need to get a taxi from London city..That’s another hour … and Crimewatch is on at 9pm.
    And that junior doctor series is on at 9pm too!!

    Ohhh..I can’t record both!..

    I’ll go tomorrow.

    or the next day..

    Definitely no later than Tuesday week……..probably.

  46. 46
    Pryce Watch says:

    Jury still deliberating: About 3 hours so far.

  47. 47
    Bert says:

    No mate, they’ve turned the water off at the main stopcock.

  48. 48
    BOOOORING !!! says:

    The weather is irritating me.

    Vote Ukip.

  49. 49
    ***** says:

    Any money that moron makes should go to the state, that is what he did to us.
    £320,000 last month, still fools and their money are parted so easy.

  50. 50
    Bert says:

    Is it anything like lycanthropy? That might explain a lot.

  51. 51
    Anonymous says:

    …and Republic…

  52. 52
    Bert says:

    They’re probably playing Scrabble, just to keep Mr H shitting bricks.

  53. 53
  54. 54
    Never play with guns when you are legless says:

    Can’t Gordon be temped to sneak up on Oscar Pistorious?

  55. 55
    Pierced Moron says:

    Better than being a gayer.

  56. 56
    EU Funded Pro EU Troll says:

    Vote UKIP.

  57. 57
    Gordon Brown says:

    I only eat ripe bananas off a granite platter

  58. 58
    Uncle Joe says:

    You waste so much time and money, I would have sorted all this months ago to everyone’s satisfaction.

  59. 59
    Paniagua says:

    Photo should say ‘spare some change’

  60. 60
    Paniagua says:

    …. and the Tory Party …..

  61. 61
    Gordon the parasite says:

    Philanthropy is about giving your own money away.

    Labour have twisted this into giving other people’s money away.

  62. 62
    Operation Crossbow says:

    The BBC are of course bigging up the gurning Miliband’s speech.

    First question to a Tory (natch) was “What’s wrong with taxing the rich?”

    Of course the BBC don’t mean themselves when they say the rich, the BBC as we know encourage staff to avoid taxes where possible.

    Then we get some gormless beeboid spouting on about how well received Red Ed’s speech was, failing to point out that the 50p tax rate was only introduced right at the end of the last Liebore government.

  63. 63
    Casual Observer says:

    Photo caption should say:

    The traitor has today been sentenced to the full life tariff.

  64. 64
    Give me back my pension ya fecker says:

    I wish he’d just feck off and take the fecking Tories and Labour with him.

  65. 65
    The Office of Sarah and Gordon Brown Ltd says:


  66. 66
    Point of information says:

    The BBC do encourage staff to avoid tax. They also encourage prosecution of those who do not pay the TV tax, ahem, License fee.

  67. 67
    Ed Moribund says:

    I’ve had a great idea! I’m filling in the blank piece of paper by nicking Lib dem policies.
    No one ever listens to them. So taking their ideas is easy.

    Its brilliant.

    The only catch is their policies are total shit.

  68. 68
    Dave is worst than Gordon, discuss says:

    The only reason why Gordon is worst is because he signed Lisbon.

    The gap is not very wide though, but that act of treachery is pretty tough to beat.

  69. 69
    The savant 10.4 highway patrol says:

    And. NEW. Labour

  70. 70
    No leg to stand on says:

    Valentines ditty

    Roses are red

    Violets are glorious,

    But never creep up

    On Oscar Pistorious.

  71. 71
    Paniagua says:

    Isn’t that the Tory party?

  72. 72
    Anonymous says:

    Gordon take a hint ?


  73. 73
    Spin Fail says:

    Perhaps relative to Zimbabwe ?

  74. 74
    The State says:

    Covered in her own excrement and bed sores, the vulnerable pensioner left to ‘lie in filth for weeks’ while a council-appointed carer cleaned around her

    Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-2278546/Pensioner-left-lie-filth-weeks-council-appointed-carer-cleaned-her.html#ixzz2Kt8tJWGP
    Follow us: @MailOnline on Twitter | DailyMail on Facebook

  75. 75
    Slitherin says:

  76. 76
    Dick Miliband says:

    I frequently make a donation in his honour in those white ceramic jobs an the room marked “gents”

  77. 77
    The State can spend your money better than you can says:

    Towns handed £100,000 to save their ailing High Streets in Mary Portas rescue scheme ‘have squandered cash on Peppa Pig costumes’

    Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2278559/Towns-handed-100-000-save-ailing-High-Streets-Mary-Portas-rescue-scheme-squandered-cash-Peppa-Pig-costumes.html#ixzz2Kt9Ib9Sd
    Follow us: @MailOnline on Twitter | DailyMail on Facebook

  78. 78
    Great British Public says:

    Thanks, but no thanks.

  79. 79
    Gordon Brown says:

    I wished Oscar Pistorius’s girlfriend well.

  80. 80
    Dick Miliband says:

    Then there are copies of Labour Policy in every home, rolls of it, on nice soft paper.

  81. 81
    B Boyd says:

    Bolly, darling?

  82. 82
    Di Ann Fatbutt says:

    You won’t catch me looking thin Keithy babes, your turn with the lard or mine?

  83. 83
    Keith Vaz says:

    Are there any grieving 14 year old girls I can put my arm around in public?

  84. 84
    Joss Taskin says:

    …… in the last month he has declared over £320,000 in cash from speeches and advisory work….

    Which begs the question, which lame-brains have paid Gordon Brown for speeches and ‘advisory work’ ?? Are they equally as mental as Brown or are they public sector entities who don’t give a sh1t about chucking Taxpayers’ money around ?

  85. 85
    Keith Vaz says:

    Any young asian girls lost a parent lately? I’d like to offer my condolences and hugs.

  86. 86
    Solly says:

    Javid is MP for Bromsgrove. The previous incumbent was Julie Kirkbride.

    Blue rosette on a donkey and all that.

  87. 87
    Keith Vaz says:

    14 year old girls in mourning give me the horning.

  88. 88
    SP4BS says:


    Please note that all adverts for newspapers are barred, unless Guido works for them.

  89. 89
    Dizaei Rascal says:

    Crooked wideboy c-unt Ali Dizaei lost his appeal against his convictions today. Sweet justice. Now wait for all the usual suspects, Lee Jasper et al, to call it a travesty etc etc. Today’s news is almost as satisfying as when a prisoner threw a bucket of shit over him. :-D

  90. 90
    Diane Abbotapotamus says:


  91. 91
    Diane Fatbott says:

    Waaaaacist !

  92. 92
    Dizaei Rascal says:

    Can’t we just deport Dizaei back to Iran? His rightful place is as a pistachio salesman in a Tehran bazaar.

  93. 93
    Zimbabwe says:

    We are not Greece!

  94. 94
    Anonymous says:

    How much Cameroon’s £200,000 Jag, driver, fuel, car maintenance cost?

  95. 95
    Oscar Pistolius says:

    Her heart went out to me. And landed on the carpet.

  96. 96
    New veggie f..ked taxpayer says:

    Inflation, you mo.ng! F…..g libdem, eh?

  97. 97
    BBC Radio 5 is Labour Propaganda says:

    Claimed £6,000 off the taxpayer to fly to London to conduct his own business?

    Shameless, scrounging, hypcritical Labour scumbag.

    Thank you for the information Guido.

  98. 98
    Oil slick made humanoid says:

    Could it be that you’re ahead in the food queue and are leaving nothing for anyone else Keef?

  99. 99
    Kim Jong-Un says:

    Come back to Pyangyong, Agent Brown, your work is complete!

  100. 100
    Trigger says:

    Any particular airline that I should beware of buying shares in?

  101. 101
    SP4BS says:

    “on a relative basis”

    Have they been assisting the unions in Peugeot, and lacing Bratwurst with laxatives, in order to make the british economy look relatively good?

  102. 102
    New veggie f..ked taxpayer says:

    Relative to what, ?, we`ve had enough Treasury speak mate, you`ve all been sussed so no balls-up tricks please.

  103. 103
    New veggie f..ked taxpayer says:

    Sounds like an invitation to Keef`s Saturday vindaloo parties, home sec?

  104. 104
  105. 105
    New veggie f..ked taxpayer says:

    Better than thousands of pleasers which mary may have spent it on.

  106. 106
    New veggie f..ked taxpayer says:

    Try Is.lamverybad banned valentine`s day young residents but usual violence v. women continuing worldwide.

  107. 107
    Point of information says:

    It is very important to remember that the slop was poured before he was punched unconscious.


    I think they got the order of things wrong there, but your average convict is not that smart thanks to Labour education reforms.

  108. 108
    Gordon Brown says:

    “Before the crock crows ye shall deny me thrice”

    Crucifixion to follow.

  109. 109
    Frank Dobson says:

    Do you know my council paid for flat is worth over a million quid ?

    And I’m not moving. Not ever.

  110. 110
    Iwin Jones (non shaver) says:

    Email me.

  111. 111
    Duty pedant says:

    Prostate, you fuckwits. Prostrate means lying down.

  112. 112
    Duty pedant says:

    Fuck it, “begging the question” doesn’t mean “raising the question”.
    Wikipedia is your friend.

  113. 113
    Copping a feel says:

    Any news on Andrew “trouser snake” Marr’s long-awaited recovery? I’m tiring of the slightly more balanced BBC output lately

  114. 114
    Bob Crow says:

    Nor me

  115. 115
    Half term brownstuff loser says:

    Kerching. That`ll teach you sassenachs to dump me, arf arf!

  116. 116
    Catty Comment (Ms) says:

    Now now Gordie – we all know you do not hold the requisite licence.

  117. 117
    Half term brownstuff loser says:

    Bet you would like to know what I did with the 10p tax confiscation? Well, up yours.

  118. 118
    Plumbline says:

    You can tell the difference?

  119. 119
    Catty Comment (Ms) says:


  120. 120
    Last prime (cut) minister says:

    Am currently looking for the part of scotch undertaker in the Dads Army remake coming to UK Gold.

  121. 121
    Catty Comment (Ms) says:

    AFTER he had been kicked out of office.

    He no longer had any authority to do so and his signature should be regarded as void and the Treaty inapplicable to the UK.

  122. 122
    Oscar says:

    I don’t remember a thing – I must have been legless.

  123. 123
    Plumbline says:

    Giving other peoples money away is something that socialist Cameron endorses with such passion, he is giving yet to be born childrens futures away and mostly for useless shite.

  124. 124
    Catty Comment (Ms) says:

    I’ll chip in a fiver towards the ticket.

  125. 125
    Liberal Zombie says:

    This is a Lib Dem / SDP issue:


    Lot of amnesia clearing up now.

  126. 126
    Plumbline says:

    Miliband, Cameron or Clegg? Makes no difference, they are all treacherous liars, who hate this country and the people in it.

  127. 127
    Viv says:

    All MPs’ salaries should be divided by the number (not large!) of days the House sits, and they should be paid proportionately.
    Let’s hope his constituents are aware that he is paid 9 and lavishly pensioned) for doing next to nothing.

  128. 128
    Plumbline says:

    Are you sure, have you seen the LabLibCon alternative? Socialism, more socialism and even more socialism.

  129. 129
    golli says:

    … and that’s putting it mildly.

  130. 130
    golli says:

    What is Tom Watson?

  131. 131
    New UK Poor (middle class 2007) says:

    A Labour source said the mansion tax – long a favourite policy of Liberal Democrats – was expected to raise £2billion a year.
    That would fund a 10p rate on up to £1,000 of taxable income.
    Some 25 million basic rate payers would be up to £100 better off as a result, the source said.

    Wow, £100, what each year?. Well that will buy so much. Thanks Eds, mo.ngers.

  132. 132
    Anonymous says:

    Don’t worry;the beeb still have Robinson on the job whist M*rr is away.

  133. 133
    Pryce Watch says:

    Jury sent home. They should be back on Monday to continue deliberations.

  134. 134
    Marvin Gaye says:

    “What is white, got no legs and yet shoots across the room…”

    answers on a post card to:

    PO BOX 500
    SE99 1AA

  135. 135
    Raving Loon says:

    which one?

  136. 136
    keredybretsa says:

    Cheaper with Ryan Air

  137. 137
    The lop-sided jug-eared c'unt says:

    On his Wiki page it states…

    “Salary £580,000[1]”

    1.^ Sawer, Patrick (19 February 2011). “Pigeonhole mix up lets slip Andrew Marr’s £600,000 BBC salary”. The Daily Telegraph (London). http://www.telegraph.co.uk/culture/tvandradio/bbc/8335398/Pigeonhole-mix-up-lets-slip-Andrew-Marrs-600000-BBC-salary.html.


    Worth every penny…not!

  138. 138
    Postal Votes are Labour Loo Paper says:

    Fuck off McDoom you spongeing parasite

  139. 139
    chancer says:

    should have fucking lasered the c+nt in half

  140. 140
    chancer says:

    Why are Conservative MPs incapable of rubbishing this posing little twit’s nonsense speeches and laughable policies?

  141. 141
    chancer says:

    what a despicable thing for an MP to say.

  142. 142
    lojolondon says:


    Also, I know I can’t claim travel expenses unless I actually go to work, a meeting or something. Under HMRC law, how can Crash Gordon claim expenses when he hasn’t actually been to the office??

    Love to see him sitting next to Huhne for perverting the course of justice!

  143. 143
    Brown out and pay me damages. says:

    Come fly with me? Stick a rocket up his arse.

  144. 144
    Sir Barrington Minge says:

    All together now….

    Heeeeeeeeeee’s a wanker he’s a wanker……

  145. 145
    Sir Barrington Minge says:

    Greasy , fat w0g!!

  146. 146
    from the global HQ the prime mincer says:

    I don’t think so sunshine

  147. 147
    Sir Barrington Minge says:

    Greasy , fat w0g!!

  148. 148
    Sir Barrington Minge says:

    Greasy , fat w0g!!

  149. 149
    Sir Barrington Minge says:

    Greasy , fat w0g!!

  150. 150
    Sir Barrington Minge says:

    All together now….

    Heeeeeeeeeee’s a wanker he’s a wanker……

  151. 151
    Sir Barrington Minge says:

    All together now….

    Heeeeeeeeeee’s a wanker he’s a wanker……

  152. 152
    NoBo says:

    Guido learns that over just a three-month period last summer Brown claimed almost £6,000 on expenses for air travel. Easyjet charges less than £100 one way so Gordon made at least 30 return flights in 3 months?? Seems a lot especially when he has not spoken in Parliament.

  153. 153
    Plumbline says:

    Vote LabLibCon and get the same shite from every one of them.

  154. 154
    Plumbline says:

    Because Dave’s dithering wet army, broadly agree with the tax and spend, big government, Miliband wimp?

  155. 155
    John says:

    Actually I think it’s cheaper to fly than it is to take the train.

    You can fly return to Dubai for less than the cost of a return ticket from my town to Edinburgh,,,

  156. 156
    Nigel Farage says:

    well said

  157. 157
    Nigel Farage says:

    Hear Hear

  158. 158
    Nigel Farage says:

    Me for Prime Minister

  159. 159
    Nigel Farage says:

    Get in line millipede

  160. 160
    Nigel Farage says:

    well said

  161. 161
    Nigel Farage says:

    How True

  162. 162
    Nigel Farage says:


  163. 163
    Nigel Farage says:

    Useless as usual

  164. 164
    Nigel Farage says:

    Its all bollocks

  165. 165
    Chris S says:

    Brown pretty much takes a year off, charges a small fortune in expenses to get to London without bothering to attend the house but retains the Labour party whip and Nadine Dorries goes away for a couple of weeks in a quiet period before Christmas and has the Tory whip withdrawn.

    Double Standards at work ???

  166. 166
    Mr Quelch says:

    That’s the line queuing up for the executioner’s block I hope.

  167. 167
    Mr Quelch says:

    Anything a MP says is generally despicable.

  168. 168
    David B says:

    Shame they did not do that in 2007

  169. 169
    Old Grumpy says:

    Whilst I’m no Broon Fan, I nte that, in the main, flights are far cheaper than train from the South to Scotland.

  170. 170
    The real Casual Observer says:

    It must be rotten for the dysfunctional looney and Balls and Miliband minimus’s mentor to find out at his time of life that he’s been barking up the wrong trees since birth and is now a discredited apology for a money grabbing MP spelt shithouse. Well, I don’t give a flying fuck. He’s the ultimate blot on my entire life and but for him I would have lots more money now I am retired. I wish him everything nasty that could ever happen to him and I sincerely hope it seriously fucking hurts the bastard.

    I always feel better for a bit of a rant against this walking turd.

  171. 171
    The real Casual Observer says:

    Don’t forget to light it…

  172. 172
    Jimmy says:

    “the rest he totally gives away to charity”

    Bastard eh? You’ll never catch a tory doing that.

  173. 173
    Anonymous says:

    I saw McMentalist in Dubai airport on Tuesday whilst I was en route to Singapore he had been addressing The Dubai Forum no doubt for a large fee paid by that bastion of freedon and expression the Makhtoum family,Duba a long way from Cowdenbeath its time we had a recall system for absent MPS we,the British taxpayer are funding this cnut to jolly round the world

  174. 174
    Gordon Brown says:

    I want buy the gold that I sold back, think I could get it at the same price?

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