February 4th, 2013

How We Hunted Huhne

When newly appointed Minister Chris Huhne walked out on his family and went to the gym, having just told his wife he was leaving her for another person, Guido doubts he realised the untold consequences of his actions that day in 2010. It was the Sunday Times that first reported rumours “circulating” Westminster about Huhne’s speeding points in early May 2011. The mystery person who allegedly took the points and was briefing out the story was revealed exclusively by Guido to be none other than Vicky Pryce in the following days. The Huhnt was on!

Huhne said on the record that “these allegations are simply incorrect.” His SpAd Joel Kenrick served out the BS:These allegations have been made before and have been shown to be untrue”. As the story gained traction Guido exclusively revealed where the speed camera in question was, and where Huhne’s then wife was that fateful day. Our research shredded Huhne’s initial statements. Guido’s favourite revelation was that his old number plate was: H11HNE.

As the affair dragged on, Guido was keen to keep the pressure up, as were the Mail on Sunday who recreated the scenario. And it wasn’t just digging, our #HuhneTunes hashtag turned Huhne into a laughing stock. Guido’s favourite moment of the whole affair was putting a microphone and camera in the deluded former Secretary of State’s face. He denied knowing anything about the situation. That denial looks even more absurd today…

It was never really about the speeding points, it was the conspiracy to cover-up that was going to do for him. No amount of spin from allies would save him from charges in the end. We should be able to report later today the lengths to which Huhne went in order to attempt to keep the case from getting to trial, but needless to say he was not “innocent of the charges” nor “confident a jury will agree.”

His sentencing date is yet to be set…


101 Comments

  1. 1
    Wacko Huhno says:

    He’s a speed demon. Hee-hee!

  2. 2
    Anonymous says:

    Bye Huhne, you utter hoon.

  3. 3
    Rodger & Doubt says:

    Better get your front teeth painlessly removed by a quality dentist quick Chris rather than have them punched out. Also a crack wax might minimise some forthcoming discomfort (I am told!)

  4. 4
    Malcolm Redfellow says:

    Mr Fawkes: you still haven’t explained that sudden legal hand-break turn last October.

    You know why that happened, don’t you?

    2+2= a certain lady lawyer.

  5. 5

    A terrible loss to the progressive gay, lesbian, transgender community.
    It’s a conspiracy!

  6. 6
    Huhne=Cunt says:

    A liar by his own admission. Well we all knew that already. He should now sink without trace from public life.

    I expect however to see him appointed to a top position within the EU.

  7. 7
    H11HNE says:

    woohoo – that is all

  8. 8
    STuN says:

    This is better than a Royal wedding hahahahahahahahaha

  9. 9
    oldasiahand39 says:

    Hang the bastard by his cojones and let the witch cut them off and have him fall into a steaming vat of oil.

  10. 10

    Brian Leveson says..

    “You see…this is exactly the sort of thing that can happen if you don’t keep the free press in check. “

  11. 11
    orkneylad says:

    Oh happy day!

  12. 12
    STuN says:

    yeah, probably Traffic commisioner or a role in justice.

  13. 13
    Cynical-old-bag says:

    In roughly 6-9 months time.

  14. 14

    Guido. Undisguised admiration for your work on this.

    If ever a point was worth making, it is that tenacity for a correct objective pays. It doesn’t always come immediately, sometimes it takes much longer. Sometimes it seems interminable.

    But you have shown here that it works. Also your analysis of what is wrong is spot on. The speeding is nothing in relation to the perversion of justice. That it should come from a lawmaker is unacceptable.

    I hope the judge takes that into account when sentencing. I have this impression he is not a pushover.

    But for now the day is yours.

  15. 15
    Ex-Conservative voter says:

    As Huhne awaits a long-overdue and richly-deserved buggering in a prison cell, the LimpDums await a fully-deserved buggering in Eastleigh.

    Couldn’t happen to a nicer bunch of scum.

  16. 16
    Boris Johnson(Conservative Leader in Waiting) says:

    I have not decided whether to contest the forthcoming by election in Eastleigh ,but will email Guido in due course.

  17. 17
    Older Not Wiser says:

    What a hideous cretin. Wasted millions of government resources on green projects…. what lies did he tell to get these through?

    He deserves to be banged to rights for a long time for all the messing about…. time our politicians realised they are just ordinary people too

  18. 18
    Ex-Selohesra says:

    too cryptic for me i’m affraid

  19. 19
    Cat says:

    Got to be quote of the week!

  20. 20
    Anonymous says:

    And well done to the Plod and the CPS!

  21. 21
    D Cameroon Foreign Aider says:

    I always thought he was a C*nt but as he was a mate of Nicks… well you know how it is.

  22. 22
    Anonymous says:

    Will the hoon be paying back the 10 years salary and pension that he has obtained through being a lying, cheating arsehole?

  23. 23
    JabbaTheCat says:

    +1000

  24. 24
    STun says:

    +1000

  25. 25
    JabbaTheCat says:

    +1000

  26. 26
    Laughing hangman says:

    He could be future meat in the sandwich.

  27. 27
    Ex-Conservative voter says:

    Harsh, but fair.

  28. 28
    Rat trap says:

    What a nice guy – persuade your wife to take the rap, then hang her out to dry by pleading guilty when she’s followed the script and pled not guilty. Price-less!

  29. 29
    Anonymous says:

    Madam Slotgob?

  30. 30
    Fuck the LibLabCon says:

    For once.

  31. 31
    Patrick Power says:

    Hills make the Tories 1/2 FAV to wn Eastleigh with LDs 6/4. Ukip 33/1 & LAB 100/1. http://bit.ly/u6wr8r

  32. 32
    Lie Detector says:

    Ha ha ha

  33. 33
    Fuck the LibLabCon says:

    The act of a total Hunt.

  34. 34
    Bubba says:

    Hey Hoon, come ‘ere. We’re gonna play mommies and daddies. Which do you wanna be? Mommy or daddy?

    Daddy.

    Ok Hoon come ‘ere and suck mommy’s cock.

  35. 35
    Casual Observer says:

    He will be gutted that he won’t have a TV in jail.

    http://in2eastafrica.net/uks-criminals-face-new-spartan-prisons-justice-secretarys-tough-regime-include-uniforms-no-sky-tv-and-less-pocket-money/

    The other trial starts tomorrow at 10AM.

  36. 36
    (I don't need no doctor) says:

    So what else has Huhne lied about?

  37. 37
    How to spot a c**t says:

    I think the letters “M” and “P” after his name were the give-away.

  38. 38
    s.s. says:

    Will Huhne put Guido on his visitors list in the clink?

  39. 39
    Viv Dean says:

    It makes a change for ‘right’ to triumph…sterling work, Guido, The Mail, the police and (even) the CPS.

    Might the Guido comments pages be more effective in future ‘campaigns’ if the contributors moderated their language?

  40. 40
    Denis MacShane says:

    I’m afraid Huhne, unlike me, has no morals.

  41. 41
    Lobbywatcher says:

    Let’s hope that all comes out in the wash…just so there’s no lingering suspicions that Huhne was fitted up by his ex-wife’s very clever legal friend.

  42. 42
    Old Blue Eyes says:

    What now the by election. It ought to have been a shoe in for the Conservatives but Dave’s idiotic carryings on throws the whole result into the melting pot.

  43. 43
    Lord Stansted says:

    Sold by Tesco? Surely not.

  44. 44
    hank the cat says:

    I must protest where is the compassion on this blog, this poor,poor man has jsut seen his world fall apart, please,please have some compassion.
    hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahgrunthahahahasnorthahahahah

  45. 45
    HRH says:

    but one is not ordinary, is one Cammie?

  46. 46
    Tay King-dePisse says:

    Which only goes to show that, if you’re going to get your wife to take the rap for you on something as minor (in the grand scheme of things) as a speeding violation, don’t, years later, become a Minister, especially of something as dodgy as windmills, and whatever you do, don’t dump the old bag for a Miranda-Hart’s-older-sister type. Things have a way of getting beyond your control when you do such terribly inadvisable things, don’t you know.
    Chris, in your case, crime did not pay, except for your brief.

  47. 47
    Life immitates Art says:

    Ever read Bonfire of the Vanities ? :-)

  48. 48
    Anonymous says:

    When do you go after Blair?

    Weapons of mass destruction?
    45 minutes?
    Lisbon treat renege?
    etc etc

  49. 49
    hank the cat says:

    If the Cons do not have at the very least a decent showing in the by- election, that could be the beginning of the end for call me Dave

  50. 50
    Able Seaman Schettino says:

    How the mighty fall!

  51. 51
    Ex-Conservative voter says:

    Interesting side note: the word “law” doesn’t appear once in the preamble to the LimpDums’ constitution. Lots of waffly happy-clappy stuff about “diversity” and “equality” (although ageism is permitted), but SFA about upholding the law.

    http://www.libdems.org.uk/constitution.aspx

  52. 52
    hank the cat says:

    Yes, read it many years ago

  53. 53
    Anonymous says:

    I usually find a little sympathy in me when someone hits the rocks and they sink.. In Huhne’s case i find it impossible, he Is a charm free zone and the slow death of his career was all his own making. Surely even he can see that he should have held his hands up right at the start of this small saga. By putting it off he made it worse and he was a minister ffs. What a plonker!

  54. 54
    fella on the underground says:

    Vicky Huhne is going to make an arse of herself with this ‘My husband made me do it’ defence

    Judge ‘Mrs Huhne what educational qualifications do you have”

    Mrs H “Law degree”

    Judge “Mrs Huhne descrive briefly your employment history”

    Mrs H ” Senior Economist, Adviser to Governments, Political activist, Governor of School,etc”

    Judge ” So your husband told you, a trained lawyer and economist to lie and what did he threaten you with”

    Mrs H ” He said if I didn’t help him out our income would fall from £250,000 a year to £200,000 pa.So I decided to lie since we both like ther good life.’

    Judge ” 18 months in the same cell. Now bugger off’

  55. 55
    Jimbo says:

    Great Work Guido, 10 years will be about right for the little creep, has to be a creep to be a LibDem. Will you now please start work on bringing a great number of our Political rabble to justice for TREASON, but first we need to get a petition on the Governments website to reinstate the Death Penalty for this most serious crime, I wonder who had this taken off ? not Mr Blair, I wonder why ?.

  56. 56
    Budgie says:

    First McShane, now Huhne, soon all the rest of the EU loonies.

  57. 57
    Anonymong says:

    Viv, the Fawkes sets up the joke, us commentards supply the punchlines.

  58. 58
    Top of the List says:

    Man-made global warming climate change.

  59. 59
    hank the cat says:

    In reply to your Miranda Hart in your posting. What would you prefer watching Miranda Hart and Sara Millicam or getting phucked by the rouigh end of a rotating pinapple?

  60. 60
    Anonymous says:

    Give YOUR VOTE, the next time you visit the ballot box, to the LibLabCon monopoly for a truly United States of Europe, you know it makes sense.

    We use your vote to endorse and legitimise our policy for a truly United States of Europe.

    Thank you.

  61. 61
    Tay King-dePisse says:

    Things started to stir “brisk”-ly, at a “constant” rate, do you mean?

  62. 62
    Ex-Conservative voter says:

    +1

    Shredded expenses (apparently)..
    Dodgy web of companies, hiding income..

  63. 63
    pissed off voter says:

    Mr Clegg said he was shocked and saddened by Huhne’s admission, in exactly the same tone as when he promised an EU referendum and pledged not to raise tuition fees.

  64. 64
    Osballsy says:

    wasnt there some other person arrested? Or cant we talk about that?

  65. 65
    Tay King-dePisse says:

    Miranda and Sara, Jo Brand even, but only because I wouldn’t want to do something that inhumane to a pineapple.

  66. 66
    Huhne=Scum says:

    Excellent work Guido. In a world of crony lobby hacks and spineless BBC bias, you stand as a beacon of hope in the protection of democracy.

  67. 67
    Ex-Conservative voter says:

    +1 LOL

  68. 68
    Gatso Speed Camera says:

    The only good thing I have ever done.

  69. 69
    Anonymous says:

    what odds for Farage standing in Eastleigh by-election?

    Big dissatisfaction around there with migrant population.

  70. 70
    Bench-Backer says:

    Huhne has long form. When he was a hack at the Guardian and Indie prior to his city-slicker-tipster career – he was detested by his colleagues who knew him to take “short cuts” and fabricate facts. During the Lib-Dem leadership campaign against Clegg, his true colours were even more apparent. His private and very un-Lib-Dem share-holdings, his part in the break-up of Vicky Pryce’s first marriage and the feelings of her two daughters from that first marriage (who saw through Huhne and refused to take his name after he married their mother). Huhne even threatened legal action against one blogger who reported on these facts. (Google it!)

  71. 71
    Devil's Dumplings says:

    Very good. Now:

    Shift Target: Left 200: Maggie Hodge – Hypocrite: Engage: Fire for effect

  72. 72
    Gatso says:

    Resistance is futile.

    Spin your way out of this one windmill boy.

  73. 73
    I am a Lib Dem and my name is Tom Pepper. says:

    Blimey these nice Lib Dems really do appear to be a bunch of crooks and porkie pie story tellers.
    Every time Farage is on the telly they nearly always challenge him about some dodgy UKIP member(or even ex-member), but rarely do they ask slippery Nick about his ex-cabinet Lib Dem colleagues who should, or will be doing porridge.

  74. 74
    Good riddance! says:

    Huhne will speed towards humiliation now the Gatso flash is replaced by the glare of a thousand newspaper photographers.

  75. 75
    Anna says:

    The appearance of hounding people, in whatever walk of life, always leaves me feeling rather uncomfortable. I was conflicted: I loathe Chris Huhne, always have, but did that leave me open to believing accusations because I could believe the worst of him? I hate these conflicts!

    Anyway, it seems your accusations/revelations were entirely accurate. That brings me no pleasure. Yet another politician, a LEGISTLATOR assuming moral superiority over the rest of us, exposed as a fraud, lying cheat and hypocrite. And they wonder why the participation in elections keeps going down.

  76. 76
    member for Stockton North says:

    On food safety, can the deputy PM confirm that no traces of truth have been found in the Liberal democrat food chain

  77. 77
    Tiny Tom says:

    Another lying LibDum bites the dust. May they all go that way at the next election

  78. 78
    T'Old Fella says:

    Guido don’t get caught over the limit and well over the speed limit after the theb hunt of the Huhne

  79. 79
    Harry Coles Hair says:

    something about Nigel Farage

  80. 80
    T'Old Fella says:

    It is well known that politicos breathe different air to ordinary mortals

  81. 81
    John the Bastard says:

    No, no, a thousand times no. He pleaded Guilty-not even our wonderful Police and the CPS could change that fact.

  82. 82
    Old Blue Eyes says:

    So another Lib Dem politician is found to be a corrupt liar. Whats new.

  83. 83
    John the Bastard says:

    No, no, a thousand times no. He pleaded Guilty- not even our wonderful Police and CPS could change that fact.

  84. 84
    Euroslave says:

    +1 – Is it just me who wanted to be there shouting “You lying bast**rd!” and hurling a barrage of eggs when he was making that pathetic speech?

    Even then he added caveats “happened 10 years ago”, my great joy is only diminished by the fact that Vicky Pryce will get off and keep appearing on the BBC as their “Greek Economics Guru”

    Congrats Guido!

  85. 85
    T'Old Fella says:

    NO, he will be on the banned list

  86. 86
    T'Old Fella says:

    The two tories that got sent down for perjury after assessment had lovely open prisons

  87. 87
    T'Old Fella says:

    Bring on the general election, I wonder which party will get the biggest drubbing, who will be 3rd, will the current whining Torires jump ship to Ukip or will still still continue to whine about Dave afraid to jump ship, we are in for some exciting times ahead

  88. 88
    T'Old Fella says:

    How many points did Guido get for that incident 2 or 3 years ago

  89. 89
    T'Old Fella says:

    Guido seems to have gone very quiet regarding the unmentionable one.

  90. 90
    T'Old Fella says:

    Before climbing ladder make sure ladder is up to the job in hand

  91. 91
    lib dem crab lice says:

    LOL— he like most lib debs dont like it up them

  92. 92
    UpYours says:

    Send him down for a bit of the Norman Scott’s internal back support………..

  93. 93
    Anonymous says:

    How about hunting Margaret Hodges and Tom Watson?

  94. 94
    Jack says:

    I hope he is called as a witness at is ex’s case be fun to see the results of two twats fighting in court

  95. 95
    Frightened Inmate #2 says:

    Farage stood there in a bye-election in 1994 and polled fewer than 1000 votes. I’m sure he’d improve on that if he stood but he has no chance of winning.

  96. 96
    angel age 6yrs says:

    I hope i live long enough to see Blair and Co’, in the “Hauge” (not william)

  97. 97
    captain gatso says:

    you should have necklaced it chris

  98. 98
    tlillis4 says:

    There must be more to this story. This doesn’t make any sense. Why would Huhne throw his career away to cover up a traffic violation. Why not just take the ban with a sheepish smile and “I’m a bit of a lead-foot” non-apology. He could even had made a joke of it: “I can always justify my ministerial limo as a health and safety measure”. He would have gotten publicity and, ironically, a measure of sympathy from similarly banned drivers and all this would have been avoided. Is he that….stupid? Or was something else going on that night and by fighting and losing this he avoids further investigation?

  99. 99
    Got a new crayon says:

    He’s been perverting Justice for 10 years – he should be on remand.

  100. 100
    Anonymous says:

    tory lib- dem scum bag. he deserves prison but i take bets now he wont. how degrading this piece of shit will front it out. well wisher hope you get whats coming.

  101. 101
    Devil's Dumplings says:

    Actually, thinking about it a bit more:

    New Target: Left 200, up 400: B£iar – complete lying bastard: Engage: Fire to destroy. No quarter


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