January 28th, 2013

Train Travel Takes Toll on Sleepy Simon


81 Comments

  1. 1
    I wanna know says:

    Where’s Dave Dee, Beaky, Mitch, and Titch?

    Like

    • 5
      • 19
        █████ Watch says:

        Where is █████ ?

        He’s in town and has no reason not to drop in and savour freedom / represent his constituents in parliament.

        Like

    • 23
      GreaterAnglia says:

      He needs to sit down poor chap. There are never any seats on the 6.45 from Chelmsford.

      Back to the chauffeur methinks…..

      Like

      • 50
        Lazy Fat Blob says:

        The fat blob should try exercise, if you are not fit enough to do a full days work, you have no business in government.

        Like

        • 67
          Lard John Prescott. says:

          I cannot understand why MP’s and those in the Lords cannot stay awake when listening to invigorating worldshaking speeches such as mine.

          Like

          • Lazy Fat Blob says:

            Can’t say I remember one John.

            They all seem to start with waffle, move into confusion and end in gibberish. A bit like everything else, you ever did.

            Like

    • 73
      T'old Fella says:

      Well at least Simon Burns is travelling 2nd class, I have notice where I live they never seem to put sufficient carriages where I live, so I suppose it is the same in the Big Smoke at busy times surely it makes sense to add carriages when busy and reduce them when less busy, the powers that be know exactly how many folks are likely to be travelling at any time of day.

      Like

      • 78
        Catty Comment (Ms) says:

        Will you kindly stop talking sense young man. You may be asked to seek your refund as you exit if you are not careful!

        Like

  2. 2
    Frederick Gideon Threepwood says:

    Lunch with Guido has that effect.

    Like

  3. 3
    rebekah aka nellnewman says:

    Afternoon snooze in a warm quiet place (HoC where nothing much is happening) after a taxpayer subsidised lunch and bottle of taxpayer subsidised fine wine.

    This then is what we pay them for.

    Like

  4. 4
    Brown out and pay me damages says:

    Oh dear!

    Like

  5. 6
    Tosspot says:

    Yep, he is running the Country and giving everything to his Job….

    Like

  6. 7
    Public Sector Shirker says:

    Why can’t Ed Miliband make love to his wife for the next two years?

    Because he refuses to adopt any position until 2015.

    Like

    • 31
      The Great Book of 1001 Sex Positions For Clueless MPs says:

      If she adopts any position, I would put money on reverse cow girl so she does not have to look at that creepy face!

      Like

  7. 10
    Anonymous says:

    Is this what you have sunk too now farage and ukip are a busted flush.

    You used to be somebody :(

    Like

    • 28
      Con Artists. says:

      Listen my little fellow EU loving Marxist trougher.. I fear we have a lot more to fear from UKIP.

      The problem is everything in their manifesto chimes pretty loudly with conservative voters and increasingly labour voters as well, especially HS2 rail which is a gift to ukip.

      That and the fact cast iron dave is a liar and can’t be trusted.

      So yes, apart from those things, I’m sure ukip are terrified….

      Like

      • 39
        Gooey Blob says:

        You may as well give up Ed, you’re not doing any good trolling on here. Farage will finish nowhere in 2015, and Labour will fare little better.

        Like

        • 46
          Con Artists. says:

          The good news is Labour will fare just that little bit better than the conservatives in 2015, as we all know.

          And that is due to ukip.

          And that is what terrifies ‘conservatives’.

          Best get yourself some decent policies which encourage grass roots support, and a new leader otherwise the cons will be unelectable for decades, again.

          Like

      • 40
        UKID says:

        What’s their policy on necrophilia ?

        Like

  8. 11
    Night Nurse says:

    May cause drowsiness. Do not operate heavy machinations

    Like

  9. 12

    Pinko FT headline: Date set for Huhne speeding points trial

    Er no! Perversion trial.

    Like

  10. 16
    Spetmologer says:

    He should stop smoking & get a PROPER JOB !

    Like

  11. 17
    Gordon Brown says:

    Lazy Bastard

    Like

  12. 18
    VERITAS says:

    It looks to me that Sleepy Simon has been meeting too many pie men.

    Like

  13. 21
    A Voter says:

    Can you imagine, if he had a real job!

    Like

  14. 22
    YorkshireLad says:

    I thought images of Members in the Chamber who weren’t speaking shouldn’t be pictured/photographed…but who cares? When was the last time an MP abided by anything resembling rules?

    Like

  15. 24
    old SHEP says:

    People used to get court-marshalled and shot for behaving like that on duty.

    Like

  16. 25
    A Voter says:

    With a porky face that size, he should be walking to his leisure activity of MP.

    Like

  17. 27
    Yvonne from The Colliers Arms Clydach says:

    I once worked with a bloke who fell asleep on a night shift .

    He got the sack for gross misconduct .

    Like

  18. 29
    Anonymous says:

    Just one more dozy bastard in a House full of ‘em….

    Like

  19. 30
    A Voter says:

    He puts the fat into cat! Looks like Marlon in Godfather 1, not cotton wool stuffed in his mouth though but £50 notes no doubt.

    Like

  20. 32
    Warning from history... says:

    Like

  21. 33
    I want an apology from that stinking University of Edinburgh says:

    What is wrong with the train?

    Like

  22. 34
    Owen Jones says:

    My boyfriend dreams of being an internet sensation, but he’s so useless he couldn’t even make AIDS go viral.

    Like

  23. 35
    That's just cruel says:

    So he is actually taking the train ? Fool. Ha ha ha ha ha…. Ha ha ha ha ha….

    Like

  24. 36
    Sir Mary Flappes says:

    Porcine Narcolepsy? There is a tried and trusted lead & antimone therapy for this. Implant just behind the left ear. Hand me my bag would you?

    Like

  25. 41
    Porkfitch says:

    Asleep on the job? Most working people would be disciplined for this.

    Dock him a day’s pay, the lazy slob.

    Like

  26. 45
    Quantitative Sleazing says:

    U Kip if you want to.

    Like

  27. 51

    Its not easy being an MP you know.

    The pressure of the subsidised bar and the lavish luncheon cause many of us to become drowsy in the afternoon. But I assure you taht we are wide awake for any vote past 9pm.

    Wide awake but as pissed as a Glaswegian in a shopping precinct.

    Like

  28. 52
    Mark Wouters says:

    Hello,
    The B.B.C. are hacking into my Email and ebay acounts.

    Like

    • 57

      I’ve just found out something about the BBC. Before it was in being the government used to hand out its info to the people by newspapers. But the government actually owned some newspapers. So during the general strike the newspaper, edited by cabinet member Winston Churchill, printed the most outrageous claims and lies.

      So the BBC really was a force for good.It checked facts and refused to adopt the government line, just because it was told to. Ministers were very annoyed.

      So, BBC. What went wrong?

      Like

  29. 56
    rebekah aka nellnewman says:

    Mrs T was famous for sleeping only 4 hours a day and being a workaholic – this lot in the HoC today are not a patch are they?!!

    Like

  30. 64
    Anonymous says:

    Fat people nod off like that. He should jog to the station.

    Like

  31. 71
    Kernow bys Vyken says:

    That’s because the rail service from Chelmsford is utter shite. He could sort this monopoly crap out first but that would be asking too much.

    Like

  32. 72
    Muuurty's Ghuuuurst says:

    Maybe he’s having to listen to Drippy Dave and his ‘The weather will scare them off initiative’ Enough to comatose anyone.

    Like

    • 74
      rebekah aka nellnewman says:

      Well it might have been bullyballs and his gurning and strange hand movements – very hypnotic!

      Like

  33. 75
    Little Johnny says:

    Now a judge is saying that if we want all our money back from Iceland we can whistle .

    The reasoning is that Iceland only ever guaranteed a small portion of the total deposits . In Autumn 2008 Brown said that was not enough and guaranteed every depositor 100 % payment with our money !

    Just how much is lost I do not know because this is where it all goes very quiet .

    I believe we have a right to know :

    1. How much of our money has been given away and lost forever .

    2. The names of all local government officers and civil servants involved in placing taxpayer money in these accounts in the first place together with confirmation they have all been sacked and banned from holding public office in the future .

    3. That bankruptcy proceedings will be issued against all people so named .

    Like

  34. 76
    Damned Impertinent Questions says:

    I blame climate change for the lack of seats on the train. Research by the University of East Anglia has proved this.

    Like

  35. 81
    Moby Dick says:

    HS2 year 2040

    Andrew Cotter ‏@MrAndrewCotter

    Who would have thought when man landed on the moon, that just 70 years later we could take an hour off London to Manchester. Wondrous times.

    Like


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VOTER-RECALL
Find out more about PLMR


Austrian Chancellor Werner Faymann on Cameron’s refusal to pay the £1.7 billion EU bill by December 1st:

“Well, then he’s gonna pay on December 2nd”



Mycroft says:

Have you read the last bit of Animal Farm?

You know where the animals are looking through the Farmhouse window?

My TV screen was that window at lunch-time today.

Be careful, the sudden self-congratulatory tone, the slightly pudgy outline of indulgence and you become exactly what you should despise.

The jolly face of the Quisling Cameron poses for your camera has mesmerised and deceived you, you who were once not so deceived.

You were no firebrand, you were a damp squib in my opinion, sorry.

You need a damned good kick up the ahse!


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