January 28th, 2013

High Speed Derail
Adam Afriyie Didn’t Choke on His Cornflakes

Guido smelt a rat when Adam Afriyie told Sky News that he had ‘choked on his cereal’ when he read the news yesterday morning of his apparent leadership challenge. Team Afriyie had known long enough in advance that the Mail on Sunday had rumbled them and an exposé was coming, for them to be able to try and spoil it by briefing the Sun and Sunday Times. Opinions on how big that ‘team’ might be vary this morning, but there is certainly a group of spurned and bitter types who are definitely on the hunt for a figurehead untainted by Cameron or the government.

Guido has long suspected that Cameron’s trouble would always come from one the of 2005 intake who missed out on jobs in government because of the coalition. Add into the mix a lot of sacked ministers from the last reshuffle and cap it all with Dave’s legendary poor micro-party management skills and you can see why there are already the plots bubbling over. It’s a long road to 2015, and things could really flare up in after a spring council election drubbing…


54 Comments

  1. 1
    Adam Afriyie says:

    Is ‘cos I is…

  2. 2
    One Term Dave says:

    Chillax. Everything is going to plan to lose the next election.

  3. 3
    Jackass Straw says:

    Coward ? That’s my boy !

  4. 4
    RetardEd says:

    I am not a coward! I look really butch in my Trekkie outfit.

  5. 5
    Sandra in Accounts says:

    Cameron is a one term “nearly” PM.

    How anyone could imagine that a leader who could not beat the fiscal lunatic McMental can survive to a second GE is beyond me.

    Vote UKIP

  6. 6
    Conservative MP says:

    Headlines too this morning over the extraordinarily stupid idea to put ads on Bulgarian TV to try to discourage their people from coming over here. What kind of thick dim members of the political and civil service class could come up with this stupidity? Haven’t they ever heard that any publicity is good publicity? It will only remind prospective immigrants that the UK door is OPEN.

  7. 7
    Jimbo says:

    Will the real contender , ” Please Stand Up ” and Please let it be David Davis (Davies) !

  8. 8
    Jimbo says:

    Could be the main idea ?

  9. 9
    The Public says:

    WHO?

  10. 10
    Martin Sorrell says:

    If there is money to be made ….
    ;)

  11. 11
    GiorgiotheGyppo says:

    Whatever you say I come anyway. Everyone knows that British benefits are easiest to get in EU.

  12. 12
    Gordon Brown says:

    I am taking up cheese rolling in an attempt to improve my image

  13. 13
    Anonymous says:

    One cannot find a stupider MP than Osborne in the current parliament. As for Cameron he is too lazy to be PM.

    Hope someone else in the conservative party replace these too. Clegg will be happy to be in the government with anyone so LD will not be a problem if Cameron is replaced.

  14. 14
    CarryHole is a stupendous Hunt says:

    Subsidised immigration = lower wages + higher rents!
    Good for the rent-seeking classes, bad for us.

  15. 15
    twinscrew says:

    At last, a sign of some balls on the bakbenches, the sooner we are rid of this twat and the other dopey clown the better, I’m amazed the press has not seen through his speech (plan) yet,

  16. 16
    bergen says:

    It does reek of total panic. Presumably it was a case of being seen to “do something”. It will probably have the equal and opposite effect to that intended.

  17. 17
    Romanian TV Producer says:

    It ties in with our syndicated course on how to become a pickpocket and send the money back to your homeland. We’re putting it on in the autumn. We’ve already sold it to Bulgarian TV!! Lovely Jubbly, as you say!

  18. 18
    Centre Parting says:

    Anyone else think Clegg will be slung as Libdum leader way before Dave is moved to one side?

  19. 19
    UKID says:

    HAHAHA !

  20. 20
    Ctesibius says:

    “Man of the People” Alan Rushbridge on Radio 3 now: ‘I go on a Piano camp in France every year’. Keep listening to him there I am sure there will be more gems.

  21. 21
    Chris ████ says:

    I do !

  22. 22
    Nick Clogg says:

    My masterstroke was getting high speed rail to go to Sheffield.The voters in Hallam will love me and put me in for another term before I take my rightful place as a very highly paid EU commissioner.

  23. 23

    Wait a moment! That is the chap who was in the cartoon isn’t it? What’s happened to his hair?

  24. 24
    Owen Jones' Father says:

    Coming to grips with my son’s homosexuality is something which still eludes me to this day.

    No matter how hard I try, he still doesn’t want to have sex with me.

  25. 25

    started It’s

    Rearrange above into a remark which, though true, cannot be posted here…

  26. 26
    Living in 96.98 percent white Merseyside says:

    It’s all about higher salaries and more opportunities to get their snouts in the trough. The well-being of the country doesn’t come into it.

  27. 27
    Anonymous says:

    a maximum distance from the light will make us appreciate it even more. embrace the dark?

  28. 28
    Lock, stock and two smoking arseholes says:

    Sssssh – the goyim might hear you

  29. 29
    Yawn! says:

    This latest brainwave about deterring the new influx of immigrants by telling them about such things as the rain is pure proof that as well as having a body that is 99% lard, Pickles brain is also 99% lard. If it wasn’t so mind blowingly wet, it would almost be funny! Bring on 2015 – voting for a current bun has got to be better than the party of Eton clueless.

  30. 30
    Owen Jones says:

    You’ve won the stupidest tweet of the day award and it’s not even 11am. Well done!

  31. 31
    Living in 96.98 percent white Merseyside says:

    I see Liverpool loses out as usual. Apart from the Londistan trains everything else arriving or departing from Lime Street seems to be two coach cattle trucks or, as trainspotters call them, bog carts.

  32. 32
    Ctesibius says:

    Rushbridger on Radio 3 now betrays a sense of self-awareness about the role of the Guardian in our society “Nobody believed me because I am a journalist”. Yes, Alan!

  33. 33
    Living in 96.98 percent white Merseyside says:

    They will interpret rain as pouring with milk and honey.

  34. 34
    Minger the Mercedesless says:

    Tasted stir ?

  35. 35
    Putr1d Labour ruined my Country says:

    Yes and he’ll be bringing 10 million others with him.

  36. 36
    Living in 96.98 percent white Merseyside says:

    For each one who wants a voice on Europe I bet there are 10 who want a voice on immigration.

  37. 37
    An Oldham Athlete says:

    You should arrand a protest about this mate .

  38. 38
    A Voter says:

    No thank you.

  39. 39
    Living in 96.98 percent white Merseyside says:

    Novak Djokovic’s famous donkey cheese?

  40. 40
    Living in 96.98 percent white Merseyside says:

    Chillax. Use of words like that will appeal to the younger generation at least.

  41. 41
    Anonymous says:

    He’ll be there for the election after next.
    Let’s call it a ‘2020 vision’.

  42. 42
    Athelstan says:

    Is it possible to have a Conservative leading the Tory Party for a change? And a chancellor who believes in sound money, supply side economics and small state?

  43. 43
    open the box says:

    Tits, stared….!!!

  44. 44
    The Downing Street Cuckoo says:

    Over my dead body. I’m firmly entrenched.

  45. 45
    JabbaTheCat says:

    “Vote UKIP”

    How can anyone but a fruit cake or loony vote for a party that has Neil and Christine Hamilton on the front grid of the dear leader’s who wants to be a Euro millionaire brown nosing competition?

  46. 46
    Grave digger says:

    Six feet under.

  47. 47
    Putr1d Labour ruined my Country says:

    They are coming for the benefits which are twenty times more than in their own Countries. There will be a massive flood of immigration as soon as they get the chance.

  48. 48
    maggie the dog says:

    Yeah but what fun it’ll be

  49. 49
    pissed off voter says:

    nobody – until they look at the alternatives. Now I agree with the UKIPs

  50. 50
    Anonymous says:

    ” Dave’s legendary poor micro-party management skills “.

    Kind of implying he has skills elsewhere. What would they be exactly?

  51. 51
    Matilda says:

    probably brick-laying judging by the relentless flow of gaffes.

  52. 52
    the savant10.4 highway patrol says:

    Try rolling the cheeses down the hill then as opposed to down your gullet .

  53. 53
    Edinburgh can stick its auto suggestions up its delusional scrounging arsehole says:

    The Barack o bummer of the Tory party.

  54. 54
    Anonymous says:

    You can find a more stupid Mp than George Osborne and it is Ed Milliband ! Osborne has never given the same answer to 8 separate questions as Milliband did last year, im surprised you forgot that one.At least David Cameron attends Parliament which is more that Gordon Brown does ! you dontread many papers do you ?


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