January 19th, 2013

Speech Goes Well, Assassin Fails to Shoot

The video shows a would-be assassin pointing a pistol at the leader of the moderate Bulgarian-Turkish liberal minority party, the Movement for Rights and Freedoms, Ahmed Dogan, during his speech at a national party conference in Sofia, Bulgaria.

The failed assassin named as Oktai Enimehmedov holds the pistol an inch away from Dogan’s face. Dogan flinches, and Enimehmedov pauses for a second without firing, giving the politician time to push away the gunman’s hand.

Ahmed Dogan was reportedly about to announce that he was stepping down as chief of the party he founded after the fall of communism.


  1. 1
    Anonymous says:

    Brilliant, but if you’re going to slot someone, do it from a distance …

  2. 2
    Deadeye Dick says:

    Duh….missed again

  3. 3
    Owen Jones says:

    Oh honestly. This is verging on self-parody

  4. 4
    Tachybaptus says:

    Can’t help imagining Cameron’s reaction in the same situation: ‘Oh I say, old chap, don’t you think this is a bit [bang] aargh [thud].’

  5. 5
    Fabians are evil says:

    If it was Gordon one of the guards may well have passed the assassin a proper gun

  6. 6
    Anonymous says:

    My brother Hieronymus is far more imaginative.

  7. 7
    Sizzla says:

    Mind control gone wrong?

  8. 8
    Blowing Whistles says:

    Beware fake assissinations – many politicos ‘stage’ them to garner public sympathy.

    Lenin staged a fake one in his first few years in office.

    Oh and that reminds me of the so called banger planted near berlusconmans house when the bliar was visiting some years ago – didn’t they both thrive on the publicity?

  9. 9
    magnum says:

    Looks like a starters pistol.

  10. 10
    A pedant says:

    Self-parody of whom?

  11. 11
    EU Watch says:

    And we want to be in a union with animals like this because ?

  12. 12
    A squeejee gang on every corner says:

    Those are the ones who have suits.

  13. 13
    T'old Fella says:

    He had about 10/15 wonnabe Pezzers to lay into the guy when the gun was knocked way, as has been said any of the present lot of old Etonians what would they do in the same situation.

  14. 14
    Common Purpose says:

    But the Fabians exist. And they are evil.

  15. 15
    EU Watch says:

    Suit does not change persona non grata status.

    Lipstick on a pig and all that.

    To your point though, that is indicating how their elite behave, which is to my point entirely.

  16. 16
    Immer Wieder says:

    Love the third world behaviour afterwards when they start beating him up.

  17. 17
    poop says:

    We’ve got a lot to learn from the Bulgarians.

  18. 18
    Not Blowing Whistles says:

    I swear there were some posts on here to do with a bus that have just been taken off. Nothing to do with me must hasten to add.

    Matrix reloaded moment.

    Certainly some oddness going on.

  19. 19
    Cliff Richard driving a double decker bus says:

  20. 20
    Guest house visitor says:

  21. 21

    That’s a load of bosch.

  22. 22
    Guest house visitor says:


  23. 23
    Guest house visitor says:

    and nothing talk…

  24. 24
    Mann, Rogers and Greaves says:

    Are you suffering from bouts of post coital depression that were not your fault? Had to take time off work? Our firm of reputable solicitors may be able to try to get you compensation on a no win / no fee basis.

  25. 25
    Reality says:

    Most of those who die are generally unarmed.

    Production of arms is independent of production of food.

    Acquisition of food is made easier by possession of arms.

    There is only one way to defend individual liberty and life, and that is through being able to defend yourself from tyranny and those who would take it from you. Being able to equal that force at least evens the odds of survival.

  26. 26
    Anonymous says:

    They seem a trifle violent for a political elite,i wonder if they are maximising
    their expenses,or up to other jolly japes,a bit like our right honourable members of Parliament…,except ours are not viole….,,well,only a few of ours
    are a bit exciteable,(joyce..prescott)…
    We are expected to welcome them to our wond…to our.,,to this alien land
    because the EU and our impotent government say it must be so,even though it
    is insane.,DEMOCRACY..huh…

  27. 27
    Go get 'em Guidio says:

    He doesn’t want asylum here does he? (& I don’t mean the politician) cos we could find him a job

  28. 28
    Guest house visitor says:

    You are all just Oxbridge arsebreaths, aren’t you all, of your shades of blue? In your constant nod and wink clubs of day to day life, until you die, perverted? Thinking rest of life is different from you, since somehow you have, at some point, became hopelessly separated from it, and there was no return.

    Battling with such thoughts, that I am special, paranoidically throughout life, saying those do that, I don’t, with stiff thoughts, very shallow.

    Doing a job, if short, I’ll get by, since I am an Oxbridge man, and no one will question me.

    St. Edmund Hall,

  29. 29
  30. 30

    The gunman thought it was Blair!

    Well they are all the same….

  31. 31

    You don’t get mistakes with a ΗΚ MP7…

  32. 32

    Start with Blair, finish with Brown.

  33. 33
    Fred West Patios says:

    Summarise ffs. Some of us have honest work to do.

  34. 34
    Stop, Grammartime! says:

    Mann, Rogers and Greaves – is that the sequel to Eats Shoots and Leaves?

  35. 35
    Guest house visitor says:

    pillage, yes, as is deep enrained in angle-saxon minds,b efore us celts helped them to think more phialnthropic. Even the viking that visited Sweign’s Sea/Swansea.

  36. 36
    Blowing Whistles says:

    How can Guido and others discuss the Leveson reports fundamental issues in respect of the ‘free press’ – [The splash / strapline atop some blogs some days ago] when we don’t have a BLOODY ‘FREE PRESS’ – in the first place.

    Hello – let’s discuss Global warming on the planet Zog.

  37. 37

    The bloke with the piece fucking started it!

    Do you think they should give him a gold plated pension, or what?

  38. 38

    Next time , buy a Glock. Looks like some shoddy Eastern European pistol misfired or jammed at the crucial moment.
    One lucky politician!

  39. 39
    Blowing Whistles says:

    Let’s discuss the impact that Tony Bliar had on WWII

    let’s discuss Scu.nthorpe winning the Premiership this season

    Let’s discuss Lenin and Stalins homo trysts – ughh no … that ones possible

  40. 40
    Blowing Whistles says:

    Staged. And the actor with the pellet gun will bet his pay-off and never be seen again.

  41. 41
    Guest house visitor says:

    Ukraine, під час відвідування Уельсу в світі,

  42. 42
    Guest house visitor says:

    Armed with a potato gun it looked to me, and I have seen arms.

    Anyone out there old enoght to rmember potato gun? like a poor childs air pistol? You stuck the nozzle into a potato, then pulled the barrel down and then up again for air pressure, ready to getting another kiddies eye out.

    NO? blame my parents then, an early experince of wepons, that serbed me well, and saved my life. Well, it was him or me, wasn’t it?

  43. 43
    Lard Pressclott of Beams, Bellies, Banjos, Bulimia, two bog seats, two Jags & Shags. says:

    Did someone mention pies ???

  44. 44

    Victor was knighted in 1999 for services to the financial industry….

  45. 45
    Guest house visitor says:

    don’t worry about it – things go on.

  46. 46
    Socialists = Sociopaths says:

    Hypocrisy and mendacity – it’s in Libor’s D-N-A.

  47. 47
    Expat Geordie says:

    That “gun” is even smaller than the Beretta 70S that I used to own 20 years ago. I’m a bloody good shot, but if I was stood 3 feet from a cows arse and had a choice of that Beretta or a shovel, then I’d use the shovel as I would be guaranteed a hit and would cause more damage.

    You’re right. The shooter is a stooge.

  48. 48
    albacore says:

    Has Fawkes got hisself a new junior
    Or does ModBot need a tech whizz tuner?
    Any road, this guessing game’s really ace
    With posts randomised all over the place

  49. 49
    Expat Geordie says:

    GHV. We used to call them spud guns, and if I remember rightly they were only slightly more accurate than the old GAT guns (with which I once managed to miss a mouse by at least 18 inches at a range of no more than 6 feet). You can still buy them in “gift” shops, the ones that sell a yard of ale, rc helicopters, rubber breasts and rubiks cubes.

  50. 50
    Guest house visitor says:

    You might be baffled how I find the shit I post from youtubby – maybe I have been there since the start, and have connections there, helped people get into charts various over since, from all over the place. A right little mess I am.

    The early vids I promoted were 1960’s/70’s ones from everywhere, and they captured in 14 year olds them. Goldfrapp, and younger Marsheaux posted always excited young ones, as well as as my old crap. Creedance Clearwater Revival and Gram Parsons and etc..

    Heard Alison Goldfrapp in Belgium, for instance? See if I can find it,


  51. 51

    It was an air pistol and it jammed !

    much a do about nothing

  52. 52

    Caesar adsum jam forte?

  53. 53
    Guest house visitor says:


  54. 54
    Guest house visitor says:

    look into my eyes, tory….

    the eyes the eyes, not around the eyes, just my eyes

  55. 55

    Which is surely why most of us enjoy jokes about the demise of politicians that simply could not be approved of in corresponding actions.

    I suggest that makes us more normal than many of them.

  56. 56
    Guest house visitor says:

    tory slim lady, as I met and deflowered the other night, in after tescies,

    And no, she was no way a horse, let me tell you that for nothing – could acshually get my gob around her tory mouth to kiss her.

  57. 57

    I can imagine a Spike Milligan sketch where the blind shop assistant thinks the rubber breasts are a Braille version of the Rubik cube and is twisting them round to get them back to base, whilst the horrified customer looks on…

    OK. I’ll get my coat.

  58. 58
    Immer Wieder says:

    With the threat quite clearly over they should have arrested and charged him instead of acting like chimps.

  59. 59
    Guest house visitor says:

    with umbrellas…..

  60. 60
    Reality says:

    I think you will find that survival is a basic instinct deeply embedded in all, and not just humans.

    Undo the lefty liberal brain washing and smell the coffee of freedom.

  61. 61
    Guest house visitor says:

    could shoot the brains out of a rabbit at thirty yards, when I was twelve, with my air rifle, sights set by me for me. But I had to stretch it’s spine because they always were going round in circles on the floor, after I ran up and finished them.

    Sold the pelts for a fiver, meat for a couple of quid. Caught a few hares too, and pelts from them were fifty quid, including tails of course. Hare meat same as rabbit.

  62. 62
    albacore says:

    You know, it’s funny – they all look the same
    A big black rectangle without a frame
    That don’t do owt when you give it a click
    Enabling scripting, would that do the trick?

  63. 63
    Anonymous says:


  64. 64
    EU Watch says:

    There is a difference between satire / sarcasm and actually walking up to someone point a firearm at them with intent. (However, do we know if it was loaded and safety off ? Details… :-) )

    The demise which most desire here is simply that of a term in office, career or end of a misguided cult. Even for the mighty Broon one would feel some sadness when he passes as irrespective of how bad they are they are still the same as us.

    I guess that marks the difference between an empath and a psychopath.

    If a life is taken as a revolutionary act that is somewhat different, and one would not seriously recommend that.

    Coercion via the threat should be reasonable under some circumstances though.

  65. 65
    EU Watch says:

    It is the way things are done out there.

    Democracy in theory, mafia in practice.

    Those people are utter filth, but that is not to make a personal attack against them. They reflect the system under which they live.

  66. 66
    Unnecessary Brutality says:

    Sticking the boot in like that does demonstrate the underlying vileness of character which the suits disguise. Lipstick / Pigs.

  67. 67
    Not Blowing Whistles says:

    Blair’s impact on WWII : That is actually worth discussing.

  68. 68
    EU Watch says:

    Further confidence boosting for Scotland and expression of support for the EU:

  69. 69
    Blowing Whistles says:

    SC your overt [on all blogs] ‘preoccupation’ with breasts makes you one odd fellow. At the mere mention of or picture of a ‘breast’ you go off on one – while on other strands you get into all that philosophical largesse with the name dropping. Weird if you ask me – so don’t bother asking. Any normal male loves the females me included – but we don’t bang on about it like you do.

  70. 70
    Bluto says:

    Steer clear of the booze “Guest house visitor” – it makes you angry. And don’t post so many Welsh video clips or people might think you are a Little Waleser.

    Try to work out your hatred of conservatives and the English by getting help. They have counselling for that – and the alcoholism.

    Don’t bring it here. It demeans only you.

  71. 71
    Blowing Whistles says:

    Is Victor Blanke – linked to Blanke Swerner Grant solicitors of London by any clifford chance?

  72. 72
    Bluto says:

    Stay away from the booze. It’s one thing to ramble about your wrong turns and frustrations to perfect strangers in a bar but here at Guido it us beyond sad.

    Get some help.

  73. 73
    Blowing Whistles says:

    No one is taking any notice of your tubing – we’re all just laughing at you you Rick P – who don’t you just hang yourself?

  74. 74
    Jimmy says:

    Stuff Algeria, make the fucking speech.

  75. 75
    old SHEP says:

    Caesar had some some jam forte, Harvey Nicks?.

  76. 76
    Blowing Whistles says:

    Haven’t heard the BBC or any other CC mongrels FOR QUITE SOME TIME mention that all of Britains underground water reserves / tables and supplies are back to normal after last years FEARMONGERING OF ‘DROUGHTS’

    Any guesses as to WHY?

  77. 77
    Blowing Whistles says:

    So Huhne tweets of being ‘Happy’ is that the sort of Happy / Delighted code for Handycocks boys having been paid off?

  78. 78
    Guest house visitor says:

    SVEM – silver volvo estate man, the modern essex white van man,

  79. 79
    The BBC causes serious mental illness says:

    Because it is not in our interests to remind anyone of anything we said more than 3 months ago, unless of course we can still push the same line or the Euromongs tell us we absolutely have to.

  80. 80
    Wooden nickel meets real life says:


  81. 81
    Blowing Whistles says:

    I’m going to have a right old good laugh at how the main national rags’ ‘leading leadership common purpose in common cause style’ spinmeisters spin up their inverted of logic drivel about the EU 5hit tommorrow.

    Be “FEARFUL” of what the free press are warning you of – IT COULD BE TRUE – but then again … ain’t spin and legal rhetoric so easy to unravel these days. Night Night – don’t have EU nightmares – it’s all an illusion.

  82. 82
    Guest house visitor says:

    don’t worry – seems I have been banging my head here today. So get some satisfactio out of that – all my coments on Guidos Seen Up have been deleted, all dozens of them.

    Great fucking Britain ey? Chop hom off at te knes – he has too much to say.

    We live in an arseole country, where you get yourhea chopped of if you are trying to build non-oxbridge types up. Lave this country? NOOO – I want to watch thes eCameron puppets make a mess of our county agan,as Thatcher did.

    Call me vouyeristic if you want. But I am going to sit back and enjoy it this time, and not get bothered at all.

  83. 83
    Guest house visitor says:

    SEE, they even change my comments when I don’t bother to make sure what I have written. Gave it a quick scan after each sentence, and look what turned up after clicking submit – fucking gobbledegook!


  84. 84
    http://www.arrestblair.org/ says:

    You’re supposed to arrest him, not blow his bloody head off.

  85. 85
    albacore says:

    Ooh! B W, ain’t you a cynic!
    They’ll have you carted off to a clinic
    Certain farces it’s best not to mention
    These days, you might end up in detention

  86. 86
    Guest house visitor says:

    Sod off Bluto. Go and bark up another tree, and make a case of some tory english arsehole. I am welsh doing fine. I should be more worried about you, friend, and what you sorts will do to the rest of us!

    As I said, go and find another project, and leave my fucking welsh arse alone, you sad tory bastard.

  87. 87
    Guest house visitor says:

    song for Bluto – rasberrrrrrieeeesss to you!

  88. 88
    Candice Storey says:

    Guido seems to have got himself a taffy puller.

  89. 89
    not a machine says:

    Dont think it can be an air pistol , see how he attempts to clear chamber ..
    none the less , lucky man . Background of assasin will be interesting , why shoot a politcian who is about to stand down .

    One report of Algerian UK hostage that managed to escape , in car convoy , as others exploded his crashed , they had given him a cemtex neck collar , managed to get out and run across site ….. and one about holding hostage to call to tell all those hiding it was safe , sounds quite a nasty Al queda job .by the looks of it they were going to kill them who werent muslim anyway , prisoner relase request they made looked rather implausable . How much cemtex did they have ?

  90. 90
    not a machine says:


  91. 91
    Guest house visitor says:

    and Bkuto, above is the mother of Lizzy One, you ignorant pervert. hidding behind what you have got.

    Hate the bastards I do, bile speaking warped destroyers they are, that need controlling, that only a Labour government can do.

  92. 92
    Tay King-dePisse says:

    I must be the only one who noticed that at about ten seconds in, as the assailant has been wrestled to the floor, there’s a sign saying “Liberals and Democrats”– and it made me wonder about the LD’s in the UK– does anyone think anything like this could ever happen at their Conference? And another question– wouldn’t you like to see it?

  93. 93
    Fabians are evil says:

  94. 94
    The BBC causes serious mental illness says:

    Breaking news, soon to be appearing on News 24:


  95. 95
    Guest house visitor says:

    last person as a lance sergeant is to go into battle with an arsebreath overprivileged tory lieutenant/captain. Knowing everything about nothing!

  96. 96
    The Far Right says:

    For once Jimmy, one is in full agreement with you.

  97. 97
    not a machine says:

    mmmm there are some very big mincers …

  98. 98
    Labour mindfucked the next generation says:

    Some good advice here for teachers and education policy:


    Stop teaching the syllabus, get the children learning.

  99. 99
    not a machine says:

    Dont forget it was still a hostage situation until this afternoon , however seems like he should do it before Eu budget meeting rd 2 . Davos I think this week , plenty of EU wonk lined up for this year …

  100. 100
    not a machine says:

    Times of India ??? not a uk story then ?

  101. 101
    Guest house visitor says:

    ten out of ten for fucking simple observation Candice.

    And I am pissed orf.

    You are all a bunch of degree losts, arn’t you all, oxbridge even?

    Well don’t look at me to save your fucking souls – I have enough work with myself and the same as me.

  102. 102
    Bless you ! says:

    Will Tone retroperitoneally atone for evolving beyond a protonemal existence ?
    The answer may be found in the photonegative; may it soon be engraved on his tombstone.

  103. 103
    not a machine says:

    mmm nice example of socialist maths though , Ed gets 10k for tax payer to fork out £20bn for bailout

  104. 104
    The Far Right says:

    But there was not much Dave could do about it except play with his dick, pretend to be concerned about the UK folk involved and hang on the end of the phone to find out what the American’s / Algerians were doing.

    Even mong-incarnate Graham Watson could only come up with a joke score line on the situation.

    He should do it, and given that the line about France triggering this current situation is quite credible, hopefully he will adjust the content accordingly: Referendum.

  105. 105
    Labour mindfucked the next generation says:

    You expect good advice to source from the UK press in these days of L-E-V-E-S-O-N ?

  106. 106
    Guest house visitor says:

    Don’t worry Blowing Whistles, i know who I am talking to, with their several jealous faces.

    Blowing, Ollie Reed for you, playing a brilliant pelt hunter, up river from Vancover, when it was a settlement of a few dozen people,

    rest of film is on youtubby, if you click part two then final part three, when suggested.

  107. 107

    If you read the previous post, you may see that the elements in it created a preposterous mental image when conflated. If that makes me weird, then I am weird. You ain’t going to change me now. Some folks like it, some hate it. Not my problem.

    I like to make serious points for sure. They may be political, philosophical or scientific. But there is surely always time for a laugh. You will see that not all my light-hearted posts are about sex. But some are because sex is actually sometimes very funny. You don’t have to read them. But I won’t be changing to accommodate you. Nothing personal, but there it is.

  108. 108
    Job Seeker says:

    Hmm… perhaps this also undermines the case for outsourcing skilled jobs to that country as well. Perhaps indicates some good resources for repatriating positions ?

  109. 109
    not a machine says:

    I dont know , I can see what you mean though. hell of lot of life lost though because they didnt want speech to fly , if your that cyncical.
    doesnt bode well for France if one of vid threats was for them …

  110. 110

    Your question may contain an unfulfilled presupposition!

    He certainly got us into a right mesentery with his jejunum approach to politics…

  111. 111
    LNG Watch says:

    Some further indication as to why the Amenas attack may have happened:


    Gas is a very interesting and hot potato indeed at the moment: Especially the supply of it to Europe.

  112. 112
    Guest house visitor says:

    Cat, I always like to express myself with a vid – seen Ollie Reed in the above film before? if not Cat, you’ve never lived – look at the wolf scene at the end of part one – that use to be Britain, about the time of Christ, if you wandered to far into the then snow then, with hungry animals about.

  113. 113
    not a machine says:

    seems difficult to compare the 2 systems , urdu vs english ??

  114. 114

    To me it is unclear exactly what happened to the gun. He may have still been holding it or covering it with his body.

    If I was in such a position with that uncertainty, I think I would put the boot in frankly until such time as it was clear that he had surrendered and was otherwise unarmed.

    Outside of that situation, then I would agree, it is demeaning. But if you are going to try and top someone, you have to be prepared for much worse than that.

  115. 115
    Guest house visitor says:

    help yourself Bluto – I am fine, with my auto-immune disease.

    I won’t be coming out with frustrated crap if I was physically healthy, genius.

    I am 51, and pissed off with MS – pissing myself at night, literally – do anything physical these days, and I am a wreck for days after.

    You know shite, Bluto, with all due respect.

  116. 116

    I can go 95% of the way with you but to even suggest that Brown is one of us is a step too far! :-)

    (I won’t mention breasts otherwise BW may flounce off…)

  117. 117

    Aw! Heck! Never mind…

  118. 118
    Guest house visitor says:

    ok tories, the top of the list – you asked for it, you child bum fucks,

  119. 119
    Guest house visitor says:

    arse bandit, under age?

  120. 120
    Guest house visitor says:

    you may notice, when you closely follow me, around abouts, that I couldn’t give a farrck, but I comment wolly, since I am welsh, and have never bothered anyone young, even lambs, honest.


  121. 121

    Have seen it Mr house. My remark was directed at BW but you snuck your 38 minute vid in before I could post my response to him. I could never watch Ollie without thinking of him totally out of his box as he used to be most of the time when he wasn’t working. What a wonderful character and yet one knew he would not make old bones. Maybe he was happier that way.

  122. 122
    Mossad says:

    Interesting support for France countering that intervention was the trigger:


    This may not be completely true though given that the source of this publication is desperately wanting intervention in Syria at the moment, but why do the French a favor ?

  123. 123
    Guest house visitor says:

    DA notices going ballistic these days?

  124. 124
    The Far Right says:

    Do not get me wrong: The attack was nothing to do with the speech.

    Dave is just taking advantage of bad situation. Bit like the press release of the government allocated Olympic tickets.

    With respect loss of life: The Algerian’s are a fairly direct sort, and this was an attack on an industry which is critical to their economy.

    The government there probably correctly calculated that the chances of hostage survival was close to zero, so it didn’t really matter who killed them. They would not be interesting in preserving the lives of the terrorists.

  125. 125

    … have never bothered anyone young, even lambs …

    And you claim to be Welsh? ;-)

  126. 126
    Guest house visitor says:

    kiddie destroyers, if so – the devil creatures. And above used God – do you remember that? And he came out with this song – he has got answers to make, since things are getting sticky for him, and when you say you follow God, and then you do perverse, well, that is next to the devil, isn’t it?

  127. 127
    Job Seeker says:

    India is predominantly Hindi / English, with a further 26 or so languages to boot state by state.

    Urdu is predominantly Pakistan.

    Point is, we are led to believe that they are super smart out there, and cheap, which is why our jobs should go there. The article seems to dispel at least one of those myths.

    I did mean reasons rather than resources above.

    ** embarrased face **

  128. 128
    Immer Wieder says:

    He is tackled to the floor by security guards and given a few just deserved few lumps. Everyone knows the gun is out of his hands; we can see that. Then gradually the chimps start skirting around the outside the assailant like hyenas snapping at a wounded lion (yes I am likening chimps to hyenas).

  129. 129
    Guest house visitor says:

    Cat, I said lambs, but there was the odd ewe…. ; )

  130. 130

    You raise an interesting point here as the LibDems like to appear so nice and considerate on the surface whilst, in the background, they are planning to stab each other in the back much more so than the other two main parties. Think Basil Fawlty and you have the character. Appropriate that Cleese was a supporter and made some excruciatingly bad ppbs for them. He never recovered from that in my estimation.

  131. 131
    EU Watch says:

    I know it is tricky, especially after all he has done, but if it came to the crunch even I couldn’t advocate that.

    God will take when the time is right, and the ethereal elevator will be descending.

    As long as he doesn’t get back into power anywhere over here that is beyond where he is at the moment. Then revolutionary acts may follow, but one only worries about events of those nature, nothing more.

  132. 132

    Did he not also have some knives on him according to the reports. You can make the oldest mistake in the book and let your guard down only to find the next weapon appearing.

    I know you feel exercised about it but I shall not miss any sleep worrying about how it could have otherwise been. If it had been the SAS, he would have had his head blown off the moment he stepped on stage so he is extremely fortunate.

  133. 133
    Bloke down the pub says:

    Are you tryin’ to say that our Tony is going to ar$e-fuck his way out of purjatory ? Pint of Carlin’ darlin’…

  134. 134

    Being a Pastafarian myself, I cannot see him being smothered by His Noodly Appendage at any close time.

    Neither an empath nor a psychopath, I am a great believer in the Aristotelian Mean.

    Much too nice, me, really. :-)

  135. 135

    The deaf ones can’t hear the zips, I hear. :-D

  136. 136
    Guest house visitor says:

    Yes Cat, there is not many of us left, you not inclusive, of course Cat, us wild out of control buggers.

    Ollie in Torbay Devon, with Michael Winner, and Jane Merrow – mmmm,

  137. 137
    Should have gone to SHOT says:

    Irony: Huge Grunt / Grauniad was advert on ‘Tube when looking for this

  138. 138
    Guest house visitor says:

    Cat, heard the time when Ollie dragged an aurtrian flag from a pub/bier haus in Austria/Osterreich and pissed right all over it?

    To say he was almost thrown out of the country is an understatement. At least fifty austrians jumped on top of him, with Ollie underneath laughing his box off. And the yank actor Pollard by the side rubbing his chin and saying “Oh gee”.

    Hannibal Brookes film it was, Michael Winner too,

  139. 139

    I think I told this some years back here but from the age of 16 I would drink at my local with chaps who were some 20 years older than I was. They were much better off too and used to buy the drinks most of the time but I always insisted that I bought at least one round so I was not totally poncing. They understood. Did we drink! But there was a golden rule. One must never give any indication that one was pissed. Whisky and water became my drink. They did not approve of the vodka that I had ordered previously to keep the smell of alcohol from my parents. I thus had a training very early in my drinking career which I never lost and it got me out of a lot of problems later when people in business would try and get me pissed to get a better deal. They never succeeded. I used to look police officers in the face when stopped whilst driving and could appear totally sober. Those days are now gone. I only drink with my meals now as a digestant. Maybe the odd liqueur which I sometimes write about here. So I was wild in a very controlled way… ;-)

  140. 140
    Guest house visitor says:

    wot! never shagged a deaf in my life Cat, but I suppose it could be interesting, when I tell her to quieten down, it’ll wake the neighbours up, ny hands going all shapesm at a crucial point of coitus….

  141. 141

    No. It is Blank. As in Milibrain’s sheet of paper.

  142. 142
    Guest house visitor says:

    yes Cat – thanks for putting that thought in my mind – a female deafy coming and howling – oh god help me, I have sinned…

  143. 143
    Guest house visitor says:

    and isn’t he j e w extraction?

    Right out of his bed, if so.

  144. 144
    O/T Militant Busy Bodies says:

    Looks like the Suzanne Moore thing is still ongoing:


    Seriously unpleasant tweeting that…

    Anybody care to figure what a ‘trans-misogynist a$$hole’ is ?

  145. 145
    Kebab Time says:

    “Your either in front of Guido or behind”

    This time behind Guido ;)


  146. 146
    Guest house visitor says:

    got to say, that lady that was on Summer Holiday, I have read somewhere, said that Cliff was “different”, Laurie Peters the yank,

  147. 147
    This is a nice pistol says:

  148. 148
    This is a nice carbine says:

  149. 149
    Guest house visitor says:

    eye sight is failing me, the whole caboot – bad genes I am afraid, and there is nothinh I or anyone can do about it.

    The only thing the doc says is rest, to stop it getting worse, so I sit here, spouting what I have seen and see, going nowhere. Cut the front lawn in summer and i am fucked for days.

    Mother died from 100% rheumatoid arthritis, and sadly, I have inherited the crap, auto-immune disorders, of very various forms. Mucous membrane angioderma is the main botherer, as well as MS, but fuck it, ce la vie, that is life, I am not that bothered.

    Shagged lovely ladies, did excellent man adventures, got a beautiful daughter and son, so let us carry on with things, shall we? It’ll make me happy, at least.

    Song for me, just for me,


  150. 150
    Jimmy says:

    “Dont forget it was still a hostage situation until this afternoon”

    Which situation are we talking about?

  151. 151
    This is a nice 9mm says:

  152. 152
    Guest house visitor says:

    my legs are fucked – used to be able to run miles until I was thirty, then things started to happen, strange, but I knew all along what it was, so there we go. Or should I say I. Don’t like to upset my friends that I am bodily breaking down, since that is how it is – my mother’s friends were crap with her i the understanding sense, so i am not going to atempt it. Thank god for the online wurld these days, I suppose I could say.

  153. 153
    Sorry to hear that says:

    Perhaps setting up your own wordpress blog, and posting links across to here may be better. Twitter is also a good way to connect – sort of.

    Some of the bits you have posted today are good, but the guesthouse stuff is being covered on other blogs.

    Be aware that the whole thing could be part of a huge operation in part to devalue information which an enemy may be in possession of.

    Doubt anyone is laughing by the way: The Leon / Fabian clips definitely relevant.

  154. 154
    Missed Opportunity says:

    As blank as a Milibrain.

  155. 155
    Guest house visitor says:

    used could hit a gnats cock off at 500metres, no tele sights – got the trophy.

    Be bolloxed if I could do it now.

  156. 156
  157. 157
    Moderated by the Guardian for saying what a bunch of Cunts. says:

    A shot in the arse with an SP50 from a few feet will leave a nasty bruise and hurt like hell.

  158. 158
    Guest house visitor says:

    OK Cat, fine. But may I say, with what you said, frankly, made me yawn truthfully. But don’t take it in a bad way, takes all sorts to make a world up. I am from he pints school myself, the disciplined pints school.

    Must have beeb in the genes or something, but I was super fit them – used to drink a gallon of beer, and I felt just slightly tiddly. Same with another gallon – 16 pints in all. Felt the same as just after the first.

  159. 159
    Guest house visitor says:

    Last time I bumped into Alison, a few years back, she giggled and said “oh you Huw again”, and I said “christ Alison, how can you do this, you’re so quiet really”, and she chucked her head around looking for an answer and she just said “yes, it’s mad, isn’t it darling”.

    bluddy horsey ’66 taurians!

  160. 160
    Moby Dick says:


  161. 161
    albacore says:

    Our Dave’s been dabbling and scribbling for ages
    His fabled speech must reach to umpteen pages
    Well, fancy – all that blood, toil, tears and sweat
    Just to say we ain’t free of Europe yet


  162. 162
    JabbaTheCat says:

    Should have used a revolver…

  163. 163
    M16 says:

    Gun jammed.. He probably left the safety ON..

  164. 164
    Handycock Immigrant Trafficker says:

    In that case they can all come to Portsmouth to teach us their ways. no problem with accommodation, I will provide the planning permissions. my boys will build the blocks of apartments as usual, we will all get rich, and the LibDems will get a few bungs for my protection as will the Grand Master. What a lovely life. Must dash, off to my villa in Spain. Boaz.

  165. 165
    Anonymous says:

    Actually, looks like a Beretta .25 (there are pictures that appear to show the round logo high on the grip elsewhere on the web)

    Unfortunately for the assassin, .22/.25 semiautomatics are not a good weapon for reliability. Misfires are more common in these small calibre guns than in similar .38s, .45s or 9mm.

    I suspect he didn’t hesitate, and the look of shock on his face is not the thought that he is about to get rushed, but that he cannot defend himself even turn the gun on himself any more as it’s jammed.

  166. 166
    Anonymous says:

    Indeed, and everyone just wants the waste-of=space moron to fukc off (and I’m not even a Conservative)

  167. 167
    Owen Jones says:

    This is my strategy explained, for what it’s worth http://owenjones.org/2011/03/02/why-labour-is-the-lefts-only-hope/

  168. 168
    Vote UKIP says:

    And these are just the politicians. Now imagine 500K of these ‘civilised’ people entering our country. Diversity? Yeah right.

  169. 169
    P l e b says:

    A global economic meltdown and who have we got in charge of the economy, a useless toff leech with not one qualification relevant to his job.

    He has been a leech his entire life, living off daddy’s money.

    His only real jobs have been towel folding and data entry investing in the Cayman Islands.

    If he applied for a finance directors job he would not even get an interview.

    He costs the taxpayer £140,000 a year in salary.
    He receives expenses for everything.
    He is given two free homes, Downing street and a second home, both paid for by the taxpayer.
    He gets a nice big mansion for his pj parties with chums, paid for by the taxpayer.
    We pay for his pension.
    We pay for his travel so he can sit on an oligarch’s yacht while leeching more money.
    We pay for his security, his lunches, his champagne dinners.

    He lives off the taxpayer while screwing the poorest into the ground.

    All this and not one qualification or any experience in economics.

    The taxpayers of this country are being openly mugged by this idiot.

  170. 170
    Alastair Campbell Murderer says:

    Very true. But the alternative is a deformed imbecile (head of a Party that started an illegal war, killing 150,000 men, women and children. and which increased the rate of income tax for the lowest paid by one hundred percent) who sits on an un-earned wealth of about £2million, acquired through risk-free property-speculation using MPs’ expenses – our money.

  171. 171
    Nothing Better To Do says:

    If you’re going to slot somebody far better a politician than kids in a school.

  172. 172
  173. 173
    Ah! Monika 2013 +1 says:

    My immediate conclusion having owned a Baby Browning. But I don’t inhabit a massive fortress on the Thames.

  174. 174
    Anonymous says:

    You have all been duped again!

    Can’t you see that Barroso is behind the lectern and Cameron is holding the gun?

  175. 175
    Agent Orange says:

    I’d like to apologise from the heart of my bottom.

  176. 176
    Owen Jones says:

    I’ve got about as much to do with Guido Fawkes as you do.

  177. 177
    Guido News Room says:

    The Prime Minister will host a “hunger summit” at 10 Downing Street, with African leaders, While 4 million children are in poverty in the UK

  178. 178
    Goldman Sucks says:

    “Britain propped up Irish economy with €16.5bn ‘back-door’ bailout”


  179. 179

    Whilst heeding your remark not to take what you said badly, I do see an irony in being accused of making someone yawn when that very person posts more videos of a greater length than it is possible to watch in a 24 hour period, even if one refrains from sleeping, eating and going to the toilet.

    True, not all of us are the same. I have never had the frame to absorb pint upon pint of beer. But I am fit and can still do headstands and other things involving great stamina, strength and balance despite being considered by some here as beyond the grave.

    For someone who has not experienced this, I present an alternative view of life. Where one does not have to conform to the behaviour of the crowd – in fact – I mostly do exactly the opposite of what people are doing. Libertarianism, one might call it.

    That is why I am not in the UK laden up with debt. I have a climate that is often 10° warmer. I do not weigh more stones than my car. I eat well bet healthily. I swim for extended periods all summer. I see more naked girls in a week than BW will ever see in his lifetime. I enjoy life.

    But it is not for everyone, I can quite see that… :-)

  180. 180
  181. 181
    Brown the Shooter says:

    I would have slotted him with my Nokia

  182. 182
    The Wizard of Oz says:

    Fortress? I bet they have fewer than half a dozen ‘secrets’ in the whole place. The whole world knows that Britain is a third rate power with a tiny army, planes that don’t work and a third rate fleet.

  183. 183
    Hittite Empire says:

    I see that lbc is going down the pan, they had Owen i’m a twat jones reviewing the papers this morning

  184. 184

    Probably one of your better parts…

  185. 185
    Gordon Brown says:

    I always liked to stick it where the sun doesn’t shine.

  186. 186
    Tweet Award Of The Day says:

    Today’s winner has to be Owen Jones (Is there no stopping him ?)

    Owen Jones ‏@OwenJones84

    Tough on snow. Tough on the causes of snow.

  187. 187

    Guns, computers, cars, politicians, they are all the same.

    They will let you down at the very worst of moments.

  188. 188
    Owen Jones says:

    Ha! No worries :)

  189. 189

    Upon maturer reflection, you might have wanted to rephrase that bit: … a union with animals.

    We do get all sorts here, including some from Wales. :-)

  190. 190
    Tony Blair says:

    You should be getting ready for a Jammy Doughnut supper early next week.

  191. 191
    Dave the Cnut says:

    I really care about the destitute corrupt African leaders. We really must keep pouring taxpayers money down the fucking sewers that they occupy.

  192. 192
    Cameron's skewed priorities.... Give more foreign aid whilst Britons starve says:

    It’s the RIGHT thing to do to ensure that Guardian readers vote for him though ……whilst his Conservative Core desert his party in droves

  193. 193
    Mummy Jones says:

    Come here Owen, it looks like chocolate on your face again. What have you been licking, you naughty boy?

  194. 194
    Owen Jones says:

    OK let me tell it like it is .

    The Coalition has spent the last two years desperately and very publically trying to get our finances in order. We’ve had an “austerity” budget. We’ve had tax hikes. We’ve had “the cuts”.

    But for all that, our national debt is still growing at an incredible rate.

    Despite David Cameron’s talk of “austerity”, he’s going to add an estimated £700 billion to the national debt in just five years. That’s more than Tony Blair and Gordon Brown added to the national debt in eleven years. It’s more than every British government of the past 100 years put together.

    The fact is, when you look at our finances as a whole, the Coalition isn’t cutting anything. State spending is going up… our national debt is going up… and our interest payments are going up.

    By the next general election in 2015, our national debt is estimated to stand at almost £1.4 trillion, as this chart shows:

    Source: ukpublicspending.co.uk

    It’s clear: our public finances are in an enormous mess. Anyone can see that. And to some extent, some politicians will admit it. But add in our financial, personal and private debts… and an even darker picture emerges…

    Compared to the size of our economy, Britain is now one of the most heavily indebted countries in the Western world. That’s official. Our total debts stand at more than FIVE TIMES what our entire economy is worth.

    Proportionally, that’s more debt than Italy… Portugal… Spain… and almost twice as much debt as Greece. Those are four countries already in the throes of financial crisis. We’re the odd one out because we haven’t collapsed – yet. But things can’t stay that way for long.

    You see, the only countries that have more debt than us are Japan, where the economy has stagnated for 20 years and the stock market has crashed by 75%… and Ireland, where the housing market has crashed 50%, and the government has been forced to accept a bailout.

  195. 195
    poop says:

    Er, this is Bulgaria we’re talking about, not fucking Hampstead.

  196. 196
    Sweaty Dave says:

    Gosh. It’s all go. What with solving the Algerian crisis and the hunger summit, I’ve got the next stage of the gay marriage proposal next week as well.

  197. 197
    Silvio says:

    Jammy doughnut quoits always goes well at my bunga bunga parties. Ruby holds the record with a straight eight score.

  198. 198
    Ed Miliband (Prime Minister designate) says:

    Thank you so much for that ,Comrade Owen.

    I shall certainly use extracts of that at the next PMQ’s to let rip once again at Prime Minister,David Cameron

  199. 199
    Owen for P.M. says:

    Well said Owen. There’s hope for you yet.

  200. 200
  201. 201
    Ah! Monika 2013 +1 says:

    132 years after his execution, bushranger Ned Kelly’s bones are laid to rest in cement

    ” Here he lies, well and truly stoned “

  202. 202
    Kebab Time says:

    I am a bit disappointed that none of the people who followed the link left a comment

  203. 203
    worried resident says:

    Can we have a new thread? I’m missing Mr Kebab (who only comments at the beginning) and getting bored of Scrodinger (who comments for the rest of the thread)…

  204. 204
    Kreatcherr says:

    Now plod should be watching the debacle as a training manual…how to offer appropriate, proportionate and “reasonable force.”
    Care must be taken to allow everyone the freedom to get a kick to the head in when the perp is down and poses no more danger to anyone.

    Politicians globally..their true character…graphically presented!

  205. 205
    Anonymous says:

    ‘There’s no chance we’re leaving': Lithuanian single mother buys designer clothes and enjoys lavish holidays with more than £1,000 a month in UK benefits

    Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2265341/Theres-chance-leaving-British-benefits-daughter-good-life-Migrant-enjoys-lavish-lifestyle-raking-1-000-month-benefits.html#ixzz2IVyr2qYO
    Follow us: @MailOnline on Twitter | DailyMail on Facebook

  206. 206
    EU Watch says:

    Another reason why Norway bins any “Fax” from Brussels.

  207. 207
    Anonymous says:

    You forgot that Youtube arsehole.

  208. 208
    Wooden nickel meets real life says:

    Ah somebody has found out about his royal lowness teflon Tony Bliar , just can’t help but agree with you.

  209. 209
  210. 210
    Onhivantiгetroviгals says:

    I’ve been firing blanks all day.

  211. 211
    giving money to the IRA says:

    been better off pumping that into Northern Ireland, make it viable and put an end to the troubles.

  212. 212

    TWAT = The War Against Terrorism

  213. 213
    Onhіνantiгetroviгals says:

    I’ve been firing blanks all day

  214. 214
    a friend whispers says:

    There are only you and me here.

    I have one hundred monikers and you have two hundred.

  215. 215
    English Speaker says:

    “Bored of”??? ‘Bored by’ or ‘bored with’ in the appropriate context, but NEVER bored ‘of’.

  216. 216
    Gordon Brown says:

    My spud gun does the jobbie

  217. 217
    the friend whisperer's friend says:

    Correction, I’ve got about three hundred.

  218. 218
    Bluto says:

    You are the one posting endless video clips and ranting, not I. Get help.

  219. 219
    worried resident says:

    …except in cases where you are bored OF

  220. 220
    We have a desperate shortage of Bulgarians and Romanians says:

    This time next year Hampstead may well be very Bulgarian.

  221. 221
    2112 says:

    …and then you woke up.

  222. 222
    Anonymous says:

    The problem with these migrant workers, you have to give them really detailed instructions, even on what you think is the obvious. How did I know he didn’t know we have a Liberal Party leader in the UK? :-(

  223. 223
    Edward Heath says:

    Remember I set you on the road to ever closer union with these admirable folks. Yes we all “European£ now and how proud we are.

  224. 224
    Blowing Whistles says:

    The irony was in the actual wording of the whole comment – read again WWII (TWO)

  225. 225

    Now, I ask you, was that ‘reasonable force’? Fun, yes, ‘reasonable force’, no…

  226. 226

    Still, loving the moment when someone obviously pointed out that they were being filmed.

  227. 227
    Keen nose says:

    Phew got a real pasting there didn’t he?

    I take it more than a few boatloads of these wallahs are expected to arrive on our shores imminently?

    Mind you it’s one thing to all pile in with your newly-found bravery once the gun threat has been removed and the person restrained / incapacitated.

    Trying on that fisticuffs caper in a typical British city on a busy Friday night might be a different kettle of fish for some of them though…

  228. 228
    Keen nose says:

    Forget that popgun, this is what a lot of our troughing politicians could do with, an SUV-mounted Gatling:

  229. 229
    Dave says:

    Should have thrown a shoe!

  230. 230
    In Soviet Ireland says:

    Gets £7 billion a year acknowledged and £1 billion+ unnoticed so I doubt that would end the troubles.

  231. 231
    Mrs Ken Garoo, Queensland says:

    On the rare occasions my stay-away husband bothers to bounce by he just eats, roots and leaves – all I can say is: I’m hopping.

  232. 232
    Tom Catesby says:

    Can we hope to see more of this at UK party conferences?

  233. 233
    Fabian of the the Yard says:

    Evil, us! Really?

  234. 234
    pigdog says:

    Tell me you’re not the real Owen Jones, you know, the silly little boy who believes he’s an expert in Middle Eastern affairs but quite frankly, isn’t.

Seen Elsewhere

UKIP’s Youth Challenge | BBC
ISIS Operative: This Is How We Send Jihadis To Europe | BuzzFeed
Shapps Defends Bashir Defection | Seb Payne
Tory Leadership Contenders Jostle Over Europe | Alex Wickham
Cutting Taxes is Good For You | Art Laffer
Suspects Will Now Have to Prove Innocence | Laura Perrins
Labour Cllr: Cops Shouldn’t Stop Petrol Thieves | HandF Forum
Creeping Cultural Acceptance of Anti-Semitism | Eric Pickles
Time For Greece to Leave Eurozone | Allister Heath
Boris: Jihadis are W*nkers | Sun
Ed Miliband: International Sex Symbol | Telegraph

Rising Stars
Find out more about PLMR AD-MS

Boris on British Jihadis. Apparently based on MI5 intel:

“If you look at all the psychological profiling about bombers, they typically will look at porn. They are literally w***ers. Severe onanists. They are tortured. They will be very badly adjusted in their relations with women, and that is a symptom of their feeling of being failures and that the world is against them. They are not making it with girls, and so they turn to other forms of spiritual comfort — which of course is no comfort.”

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