January 10th, 2013

One-sie Nation: Ed and Dave Deny

The fall out from Nick Clegg’s onesie confession rumbles on with Ed Miliband’s office confirming to Guido that the Labour leader does not own a onesie. So it’s not a one-sie nation…

Downing Street are refusing to say whether the Prime Minister has one. It will probably be accidentally leaked in a couple of days…

Picture via @MirrorMcTague


UPDATE II: Downing Street sources say “it didn’t come up at the launch of men’s fashion week” when asked whether Dave has a onesie. Guido will take that as a no…


  1. 1
    A Droyd says:

    No – it’s a nonesie!


    • 4

      It’s a Onesie Nationie.


    • 69
      Popeye says:

      We plebs have always called them boiler suits, sad upbringing or out of touch?


      • 102
        Old Oily Engineer says:

        Used to wear a blue cotton drill one. looked alright with my leather grained Tuff boots.


    • 72
      Engineer says:

      Just look like badly made overalls to me.


      • 107
        Anonymous says:

        nothing happens by chance…now we are being introduced to the world of work overalls and in due course babygro for adults by our masters.

        this is what the master race thinks of us. Either work like a slave or be kept as pets by them. let’s not forget pets sometimes are kept as babies by their masters.


        • 124
          Engineer says:

          You’re just smearing skilled people like fitters and welders as slaves and babies now. Grow up, sunshine.


          • Mynza pint says:

            If I didn’t wear one of them while servicing the car, my good lady would do her little nut at having to wash my best suit.


    • 158
      Mdm DeFarge says:

      Churchill’s version was called a siren suit and you put it on when you had to make a quick exit for the bomb shelters in WW2. Useful when the brown stuff hits the fan.


  2. 2
    Time 2 CTRL, ALT & DEL says:

    lets hope it wasnt a cast off from Mark Oaton


  3. 3

    Nice to see the MoD clean up after themselves
    This is Cawden beach on the east coast an abandoned bombing range
    watch it from 4.10 mins in !


    • 6
      Jackass Straw says:

      Ah ! Those Weapons of Mass Destruction !!


    • 27
      It's my party so I will sware if I have to says:

      Got stacks down this way – Pendine beach has so much bullets and shells fired into the sea, you could sey up a lead mine there.


      • 44
        The Daily Redtop says:



        • 60
          It's my party so I will sware if I have to says:

          Wish they were. Good beach for august mackeral though – you can literally walk out up to your waist and pick them out by hand – but wear cloth gloves, they are slippery buggers.


    • 99
      Kaboom Beast says:

      There is worse
      A huge ship full of HE off tyhe coast of kent that will cause a Tsunami if it detonates
      A gift from WW2

      Many years ago The Beast (PBUH) was caught grabbing an unexploded mortar round up on Sennybridge (Yes I am an idiot) and sticking it into my bergen

      So if any loony fancies making IEDs all they have to dois visit a MOD range
      Its scanalous


  4. 5
    Fiddling While Rome Burns says:

    He looks like the Tellytubby Tinky Winky or is it La La?


  5. 7
    Kebab Time says:

    Can Guido confirm that no-one in the Guy Newsroom own a “One-sie” ?


  6. 8

    Cameron is still hoping that someone will hug his hoodie


  7. 9
    Owen Jones says:

    Louis Walsh and me have identical onesie’s.

    Any thoughts on getting one for Eric Pickles ?


  8. 11
    Steve Miliband says:

    Apparently Gordon has a onesie made out of canvas. Oddly the arms are joined together behind the back.


  9. 12

    Automatic Updates

    The updates are being installed

    Overall Progress:



  10. 13
    I d on't nee d no doctor says:

    Guido, you really must do better.


  11. 14
  12. 15
    Gordon says:

    Look Sarah, I’ve got a twosie.


  13. 16
    Owen Jones says:

    It was PMQ’s yesterday so we were prepared for a big night and some surprises along the way. However, one shock we were not prepared for was the sight of Ed Balls in a onesie!

    After finding out he was still Shadow Chancellor, Ed Balls promised he would wear a onesie to fit in with the Shadow Cabinet who just can’t seem to get enough of theirs. He then turned up to Shadow Cabinet meetings in a bright red onesie!

    After PMQ’s yesterda, Ed Miliband said to Ed Balls: ‘We can be two chavs in a tracksuit!’.


  14. 17
    Moussa Koussa Mark 4 says:

    Come on !!!! Neo Nut Right Wing F*uckwits. There is a story for you all to get behind and support. The Flag F*ucks

    Full official name = The Conservative and Unionist Party of Great Britain and Northern Ireland…..LOL

    But still no comment from Dave / Guido / or any Neo Nut on the situation in the “North of Ireland”, specifically about the behaviour of the Tory backers The Ulster Looneysticks


    • 22
      Vote UKIP says:

      Only neo left-wing fuckwits support the Conservatives these days.


      • 74
        Raving Loon says:

        The only argument I hear these days in favour of the Tories is tactical voting. No-one votes Tory based on a genuine belief system anymore.


        • 131
          David 'tumbleweed' Cameron says:

          You don’t seriously expect to be given the opportunity to vote for a Tory, do you ?’


  15. 19
    A Normal Person says:

    What a complete wally.


  16. 20

    When to Repot your Bonsai (one of a series)

    Bonsai cannot be repotted at any time of the year; for the majority of species, there is a small period of time during the Spring where the roots can be disturbed and pruned with reduced risk of danger to the tree’s health.

    It is not easy to immediately identify the different stages of Spring Buds until you are familiar with a particular species, as their appearance differs from species to species. However, the basic descriptions of a winter bud, a slightly swollen bud, a lengthening bud and an opening bud does hold throughout all species.

    Repotting can be safely carried out when the buds are swollen and extending, repotting is best carried out when the buds are extending.

    Repotting can be carried out when the buds are dormant but will result in a loss of vigour in the tree until it recovers the ‘energy’ lost from the roots. For this reason, winter repotting (repotting when the buds are still dormant) is not advised.


  17. 21
    It's my party so I will sware if I have to says:

    Happy Birthday me, I’m 51, and still got all my teeth – well, 30 actually, lost two in thporting accthidents, as you do.

    Right, what were we talking about? One-sie?!? What the fuck is that when it is at home? Heard of baggsie, as in that girl, to one’s mate, but one-sie surely must be an euphamysm, for cock? Tell me if I am wrong.


    • 32
      It's my party so I will sware if I have to says:

      OOOHHHH – all over trousers, I get it now.

      Christ I’m getting slow.


      • 37
        It's my party so I will sware if I have to says:

        …and we used to call them overalls in my day – seems car mechanics is not a popular hobby anymore.

        What’s with kiddies today, ey?


  18. 23
    A Normal Person says:

    Churchill looked like a knob in one too. Great guy, but a mystifying lack of a sense of dignity.


  19. 29
    Ah! Monika 2013 +1 says:

    For Gays and Greens


  20. 34
    Jim "I'm such a patriot, I moved to Dubai" Davidson says:

    Fuck Tories


  21. 38
    Oy Vey says:

    A couple of people don’t own something?

    Yeah, web journalism is definitely the future


  22. 39
    None of the above says:

    Dave will indeed have on Onesie and but it will be assless


  23. 40
    Sir William says:

    Do they make them in Harris tweed?


  24. 45
    Poundland Promo says:

    The one-sie is the perfect solution for busy single mums on benefits who haven’t got time to put on tops AND bottoms.


    • 51

      Nick Buckles is also Chairman of the Lingerie Internationale des Sociétés de Surveillance.


    • 142
      dick dastardardly mp says:

      Where I live they go shopping in their PJs. Given that many of the ladies tend to strain the boundaries of their attire (if not just the buttons) this can be simultaneously enlivening and sickening.

      This is a step up in sartorial elegance

      Could we get the speaker into one? And perhaps his good wife though I recommend she wears it upside down


  25. 47
    Raving Loon says:

    Is this what people mean by the Guido-isation of politics?


  26. 48
    It's my party so I will sware if I have to says:

    The main question we need to ask, is there a set of grandad’s all-over underwear under that, with the flap at the back held up by buttons, and put down when you go for a shit?


    • 49
      It's my party so I will sware if I have to says:

      But it was designed for outside bogs then though, to take into account of cold winters, brassy balls and all that.


  27. 54
    It's my party so I will sware if I have to says:

    My daughter at fourteen, seeing me in my grandads all over underwear, with the back flap down, forgotten to button up after a visit.

    And yes, she is my daughter, so behave!


  28. 55
  29. 58
    Tom Watson says:

    The tory party is riddled with nonsies.


  30. 59
    Sir Mary Flappes says:

    Just saw that Jacqui Dromey on the DP. Dressed as a Lesbian. I know who wears the onesie in that house. It’s chainmail and razor blades around a welded gusset and asspiece.


  31. 60
    Chris Hunhe says:

    I believe I may be getting a bright orange one soon. Complete with shackles.


  32. 62
    Paul from Paulsgrove says:

    But what happens if you trump inside a onesie


  33. 68
    Poundland Promo says:

    You can slip seamlessly from bed to sofa and back again without all the inconvenience of washing and dressing with our new range of one-sie’s.


  34. 75
    lola says:

    A onesie is a boiler suit for wankers


    • 76
      It's my party so I will sware if I have to says:

      quite dirty work sitting in front of a telly, shoving crisps and chocolates and porky-pola into one’s face, ey?


    • 88
      Ah ffs says:

      Suit our three delightful crapheads, the ones they call leaders of our three main political parties.


  35. 82

    You can guess what is coming !
    Over a third of food we produce is thrown away according to the gov

    If a vegetable is misshaped then it cant be sold in a supermarket ,so it goes to landfill
    What do you think goes in to processed food ,prepared veg or even animal feed
    Egg processors send all their misshaped and cracked eggs to the food industry
    meat processors send the bones and offal to be mechanically reclaimed to make pies sausages and burgers and pet food

    I can see a Food Production tax coming here !


  36. 83
    NOM NOM NOM says:


    • 87

      Less is more?

      The opposite of you, then…


    • 100
      Fat Abbott is Thick says:

      What is it with Labour and telling legislating people what they must do? Have they never heard of free will?

      ‘m looking foreward to the Goldilocks breakfast march where people openly eat porridge with treacle, sugar puffs and frosties in front of the plod.

      George had a pastie Tax and Abbott is now pressing for a Frostie ban.


      • 108
        Casual Observer says:

        Fabianism. It’s all about what you should do.


        • 116

          The is–ought problem in meta-ethics as articulated by Scottish philosopher and historian David Hume (1711–76) is that many writers make claims about what ought to be on the basis of statements about what is. However, Hume found that there seems to be a significant difference between descriptive statements (about what is) and prescriptive or normative statements (about what ought to be), and it is not obvious how we can get from making descriptive statements to prescriptive. The is–ought problem is also known as Hume’s Law and Hume’s Guillotine.


          • Occams Razor says:



          • Getting the bunting out says:

            Bloody hell I thought it said Huhne for Guillotine.



          • William of Ockham
            Entities should not be multiplied beyond necessity.

            Note the last word.

            cf Karl Menger
            Law Against Miserliness: Entities must not be reduced to the point of inadequacy or
            It is vain to do with fewer what requires more

            They actually say the same thing if you have a clear understanding of the concept of necessity, something which would not apply to you in any event.


    • 112
      Diane Abbott says:

      In fact lets limit everything, then parents can simply buy an empty cardboard box and decide how much food is in it, not big business.


    • 114
      FFS says:

      Parents can already decide how much sugar is in their kids fucking cereal by buying them non sugary cereal like porridge you stupid cow.


    • 122
      Busy Single mum says:

      Do what you like you fat bitch,I give my kids sugar puffs sprinkled with sugar.


    • 144
      dick dastardardly mp says:

      Parents can make that decision now. Its called having free choice to buy what you want.


  37. 92
    Edward Miliband Leader of the Opposition says:

    Whath thith??!!! Oneseis are becwoming popular? I musth borrow some workman’s overalls forthwith!!


  38. 96
  39. 97
    None of the above says:

    But which one is Dave, Nick, Gideon, or Ed?


  40. 103
    Ad hominem says:

    Clegg is shit.


  41. 104
    Moussa Koussa Mark 4 says:

    if you have seen the size of fat boy fat Gudio recently….he would need a “Twosie”


  42. 105

    7 prisons to be closed will save taxpayer 60 million quid a year
    Really ! What a load of bollocks !
    The prisoners will then be rehoused in a new super prison !
    Labour costed the building of a new super prison at 1.5 billion quid before they scrapped the idea
    So how can spending 1.5 billion quid save 60 million a year ?
    by the time you break even on the 1.5 billion , the fucking prison will be to old and need rebuilding


    • 120
      Wormwood Scrubs will be the New Des Res says:

      All the little Victorian lockups up and down the country cost a fortune to run. Given that most have prime locations their sales should easily pay for a modern efficient new prison.


    • 121
      Governor beast says:

      A huge open air camp in Scothland is the answer
      Plenty of rainwater , throw dead deer over the wire once a week and make them listen to bagpipes and Jockanese voices over a tannoy all day
      How’s that for a detterent?


      • 130
        Why did Dave resign as a Director of a FTSE100 company just before it delisted says:

        It is only right that in these times prisons should be cost neutral for the taxpayer.

        1. Prisoners should have unlimited 45 minute visits for which the charge will be £50 plus VAT

        2. Charges be intoduced for food and board.


      • 153
        Mynza pint says:

        Free treadmills too so they can generate their own heat for their tents and baked bean cookers.


  43. 106
    Anonymous says:

    BOE leaves interest rates unchanged .

    FTSE100 hardly moves.


  44. 110
    It's my party so I will sware if I have to says:

    Right, I have spent enough time on this thread, time to discover what shite I have posted on earlier threads, but a song for George O, and his small penis,


  45. 114
    toddling beast says:

    Just what is wrong with boxers and a T shirt???

    Wouldnt suprise in the least if Cameron also has a rocking horse and pampers
    The previous tenent probably left his


  46. 128
    Sa-vile says:

    Still prefer the shell suit ;-)


  47. 133
  48. 138
    dick dastardardly mp says:

    It will probably be accidentally leaked in a couple of days…

    After a focus group session. And if he has one it will be deepest blue – with subdued yellow and green flecks


  49. 146
  50. 147
    2013 is going to be bleak in sunderland as the benefit caps kick in says:

    Mark Oaten and Lord Boothby liked twosies!


  51. 151
    Riggsy Brown says:

    Winston Spencer took to wearing a one-piece (then called)`boiler suit’ for practical reasons. Sadly, he became incontinent in later life.


  52. 155

    Breaking ! Two thirds of MP’s think they are underpaid
    They want a basic of £86,250 +
    The dirty thieving fuckers have got some neck
    Time for the revolution , break out the piano wire !


  53. 157
    Sa-vile says:

    So much for “we are all in it together” – some are in it more than others – and some have their trotters in the trough
    MumsNet: MPs allowed to claim £160 on groceries a week when DLA is only £77 per week
    MPs allowed to claim £160 on groceries a week when DLA is-only £77 per week


  54. 159
    MB. says:

    Been wondering myself what all the fuss is about them, standard dress for men in the Western Isles for many years usually with a pair of welly boots.


  55. 161

    Not suited to male mp’s as there is no anal access flap


  56. 162
    Gary Jones says:

    Hitler was better dressed than Churchill


Seen Elsewhere

Osborne’ Real Deficit Reduction Record | ConHome
Blameronism | Peter Oborne
Everyone Can Lose | Staggers
Splintering of the Left | Tim Montgomerie
Fallon’s Lawyer Loathing | Quentin Letts
Speaker Bercow Defeated | BBC
Nigel Farage is Bigger Than Jesus | Speccie
Year of Sleaze | City AM
Top 10 UKIP Donors | London Loves Business
Tory Candidate Leaflet Blooper | Get West London
Why Aren’t Middle Class Voting Tory? | Sun

Find out more about PLMR AD-MS

Labour insiders turn on Ed over Powell’s latest gaffe:

“When is he going to stop promoting useless people? He was warned about her.”

Tip off Guido
Web Guido's Archives

Subscribe me to:


AddThis Feed Button

Guido Reads

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 1,641 other followers