As reported in yesterday’s Daily Star Sunday:
JIM Davidson was praised by Iain Duncan Smith as “a true Conservative supporter” back in 2001, after the comedian bankrolled his victorious Tory leadership campaign. Davidson returned the favour, calling IDS a “very, very caring man” and helped raise cash for the party. Jim is still a member of the posh Carlton Club on London’s St James’s Street that’s favoured by Tory grandees. Guido’s mole reports that recently Davidson was noisily speculating in the club bar about who might be next on the Jimmy Savile cops’ list. The funny man isn’t laughing now he has been nicked flying into Heathrow on his way to the Celebrity Big Brother house.
Guido’s other favourite story from this week had to be Lembit’s New Year’s Eve:
HAPPY New Year to Lembit Opik, who welcomed in 2013 from the cloakroom of the Driver nightclub in London’s Kings Cross. New Year’s Eve revellers were shocked to discover the former Liberal Democrat MP dressed in black tie, checking IDs, tickets and taking coats. He told one partygoer that he wasn’t promoting the “secret agent-themed” party, just helping out as he was “at a loose end”. “It was all incredibly bizarre, as were his dance moves,” one told Guido.
Half a million people read it in print yesterday, and you can now read the blog’s Sunday column online here.
That Opik story was gold
You still here?
Jim plays it as he sees, while Lempit looks at the stars – he is right big bang theory, with a hell of a long cock, I have heard. Put Patrick Moore, god rest him, to shame with his little twinkle.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=df1q4QYBAOg
hate it when that happens, fucking CBS yank fascists. The ginger one from Manch then,
Mick Fucknall, the sexually incontinent garden goblin.
A true labour fanny botherer, I was told.
@”Care in the Community”
Clearly. You fick or summat?
I put honey on my porridge this morning. Can I expect to be water boarded by the plod sometime soon?
As the Scotch add copious quantities of salt to their porridge can Andy Burnham confirm that he intends to incarcerate the whole Jock nation in Barlinnie ?
No. When the Scotchists do it, it’s because it’s “in their culture”.
It’s only ‘wrong’ when the English do it (as with anything), because you’re all scum.
I coat my p*e*a*s with honey,
I’ve done it all me life;
It makes the p*e*a*s taste funny,
But it keeps them on the knife!
Prezza likes his sausage rolls,
with some mustard.
Don’t think he like it cold but,
microwaved ovened.
Broadcaster Stuart Hall pleads not guilty http://itv.co/XdPWAF
And your point about Davidson is?
He hasn’t been found guilty of anything yet.
He hasn’t even been accused of having had sex with kids, or girls. The allegations concern two women who were in the 20s at the time the accusations occurred, 20+ years ago.
So he’s been shagging grannies?
Are you saying it as if that were a BAD thing?
A man with many enemies on the influential Left who has not yet been charged or tried in a court of law. Counter argument being that he’s not important enough in the scheme of things to bother fitting up. Why not see how this develops, eh.
I am still waiting, for the knock on my door, for doing lawful things, and telling the truth.
But I reckon it won’t be long now, before I get pulled up, as those SE Tories do, when they get like this.
That the BBC gave full publicity to Davidson’s arrest and no publicity to Harris’s arrest tells you all you need to know about the BBC.
That’s actually quite tragic. I thought MPs who lose their seats get an automatic payoff of a year’s salary. Did Lembit blow the lot wining and dining a cheeky girl replacement?
Tragic?
I have always thought Opik a total and utter wanker, but if he is prepared to work in a cloakroom, fair play to him this time.
I might be guilty of stealing the sausages , but not hiding them
Wanna be in my gang?
Ha ha, now even Geedo is drawing attention to the fact Jim’s a staunch Tory. Rather ironic given the umbrage many of you took last week when I mentioned it, accusing me of using smear tactics.
How I intend to hit the British Electorate’s ‘G’-spot in 2013 – fuck knows, as I’m a bender, and in to little boys’ botties, like my hero Blair – but here goes:
Gay Marriage
Global Warming
Gagging for War in Syria, Iran, Lebanon, pretty much anywhere Israel tells me.
that should do it!
Guido, is that all you have? More celebrity tittle-tattle. Zzzzz. 1m mostly, hard-working, financially struggling families are being hit for up to £3k today. The average family is losing more than £2k before tax. People are f***ing angry.
I know the taxes are hitting you all hard. But what’s really important is I collect your money (under threat of putting you in prison) and throw it all down the toilet marked ‘foreign aid’.
British foreign aid – where would India’s space programme be without it, what what?
Toodle pip!
I think you may be reading the wrong Blog Ex Tory. The first line in its job description reads “Tittle Tattle”.
May I suggest you go loiter around the Guardian?
Song for David Cameron, with love, and a sort of peace pipe smoked,
Might be over his head, but who cares.
Two fascinating stories Guido, and two further reasons not to buy this rag!
1. Andrex is much cheaper.
2. Andrex doesn’t leave newsprint on one’s arse.
Hope Lembit has his Bouncers Licence from the Security Industry Authority or they may be around to nick him
Just checked the SIA Licence Holders’ list – yup, as expected, no entry for Opik….
Operation Yewtree might be looking at Stephen Hawking.
Did that last week:
Professor Stephen Hawking
The Dalai Lama
The Duchess of Cambridge’s unborn baby
Clarence (the lion that the Scotch report road potholes to)
Superman
Sir Bernard Hogan-Howe
With Stephen Hawking they’ve got hard evidence of his work on black holes.
I’m on Dancing with Ice! Now that Pamela Anderson’s been voted off, there’s at least one huge tit left on the show.
I must assume Guido’s column in the Star was written by Neo, famed for making Oxfam on-line’s 2nd hand clothing look quite presentable, still anxiously hoping that he can reinvigorate the mode for brown corduroy trousers.
Who else but clothes concious H@rry of impeccable taste, would find the need to praise Chucka’s made to measure attire?
Kevin Spacey to play Francis Urquhart in an American re-”tool”-ing?
Would that be the same Kevin Spacey who accounted for injuries to himself by claiming that he was robbed of his mobile phone whilst trolling– ermm, “strolling”– around in a park in the middle of the night? Who later withdrew the police report altogether for reasons unknown (don’t ask, don’t tell)?
Will his name come up in some ongoing investigation?
We couldn’t possibly comment.
The Taxus Baccata lives at least 2,000 years but as the trunk becomes hollow it is not possible to count the rings.
Highly Toxic, 200–400 mg/kg body weight will kill a horse.
Often found in grave yards.
So why did the cops sll it operation Yew Tree?
Yew is a true pagan tree – hate the way they use it, for their own smallminded purposes.
go one, what they say in the end, by life’s chances.
generally known as amen. Now you know what it means, you heathens.
gone quiet here – is there a new thread?
Yew tree if yew want, the Lady’s not for treeing.
maggie thatcher the acorn snatcher
Likely named YewTree as it was investigating the crimes of the dead: Yew is typically found in a cemeteries.
Its more lethal aspects and longevity are likely slightly more subtle reasons.
Would Sir like a boiled sweet, a spray of after shave, or perhaps something for the weekend?