December 21st, 2012

Guardian Live Blog Their Own Demise

The morning after we learn that the Mail Online now has almost double the reach of the Guardian, Kings Place’s finest are pouring precious resources into Live Blogging the ‘end of the world’:

Guido is sure that those facing the chop in editorial this Christmas find the whole thing hilarious.


  1. 1
    Kebab Time says:

    The Guardian will live blog anything!!! No wonder its losing money

    • 2
      Diddley says:

      They frequently blog,but I doubt they was their hands or flush. Dirty leftys.

    • 16
      The plebs on this blog says:

      You were sorely missed yesterday, where were you?

    • 46
      Underpants says:

      Would have though that “the rapture” would have interested you Guido?

    • 56
      Revisit the OED now! says:

      They should live blog PT’s weekly Shark
      Jump. I fear the word ‘satire’ is no longer of sufficient weight to capture the sheer audacity of her comic genius.

    • 68
      R U Havin a Laff? says:

      The Mail has double the reach of the Guardian?

      You have been too close to Westminster too long Guido. In the real world the Guardian has no reach to double.

      Outside of the political village the Guardian is only found in public libraries, teachers’ common rooms and BBC local radio.

      • 76
        genghiz the kahn says:

        and pinned to outside lavatory walls.

      • 115
        Living in 96.98 percent white Merseyside says:

        Isn’t The Guardian ranked No.3 in the world for the number of hits exceeded only the The DM and The NYT?

        • 197
          Bill says:

          yes it is but in typical lefty style no body pays for it. thye just used the blog to direct traffic and con advertisers to advertise ont he site. Hence the more shrill articles recently and the americanisation of the papers blog

  2. 3
    Peter Cook says:

    Hmmm, Not quite the conflagration we had been led to expect…

  3. 4
    Sir William W says:

    The end of civilisation? I’m waiting for it to start.

  4. 5
    Bernard Hogan says:


  5. 6
    HMMM says:

    The end of civilisation?, didn’t that happen some time ago?.

  6. 7
    3 minutes and counting ... says:

  7. 8
    rabid hamster says:

    How much longer can the Scott trust support the grauniads haemorrhaging of cash? Shurely the graun is now on its own countdown to catastrophic bankruptcy!

  8. 9
    2 minutes and counting ... says:

  9. 10
    genghiz the kahn says:

    The end of the world will come before that 23 year old is named by The Guardian.

  10. 11
    1 minute and counting ... says:

  11. 12
    0 minute and counting and still alive.... says:

  12. 13
    Tachybaptus says:

    Still here, I think.

  13. 14
    Afghanistan Banana Stand says:

    Well, it seems we’re all still here…

    …sadly, so is Moonbat

  14. 15

    See, Once again i saved the world !

    • 37
      C O Jones says:

      I sent a Christmas card to you, at the House of Commons. It came back marked “not known at this address”.

      • 213
        The savant10.4 highway patrol says:

        Or more precisely

        “. Not seen at this address for past two years. But still. Draws. Salary … “

  15. 17
    commode is free says:

    The Guardian must console itself that it will always have double the retch of other newspapers

  16. 18
    Swiss Bob says:

    At least I’ve got a good excuse for not sending any Christmas cards this year.

  17. 19

    Interesting that the Mail on-line reach is less than double the Guardian whereas its print sales nine times bigger.

    • 26
      Hangs head in shame says:

      I have to admit I occasionally visit the guardian website, but would never ever ever ever, (have I made my point?) buy the fucking rag. But the MIL likes the DM hard copy, ooeerrr missus.

  18. 20
    Plantagenet says:

    Telegraph are doing it too

  19. 21
    Theresa May says:

    Only 364 shopping days to the end of the world

  20. 24
  21. 25
    Sitting under the stairs with a tinfoil hat on says:

    Is it all over yet?

  22. 28
    Dingbats and other loonies stand down says:

    At the command…”Remove Tin Foil Hats !!” the assembled multitudes will remove tin foil hats and take their largcatil ..wait for it laddie !!!….”Remove…Tin Foil Hats !!

  23. 30
    The Sleeper says:

    Fuck it…this means that I have to get my arse into gear and do some X’mas shopping.

  24. 31
    David Cameron says:

    Seeing as today is the end of the world I’m gonna contact all my relatives to tell them…

    I’m gay!

  25. 33
    Watch out Dave says:
  26. 35
    Daily Fail says:

    Lord Rothmere was personal friends with Hitler.

  27. 38
    Mayans are people too says:

    So what if we got the date wrong? Unlike you heathen today, at least our kids could count and we sure knew how to party (like it’s 1999).

  28. 39
    Marriage is dangerous says:

    A woman from Zurich has been jailed for four years in Switzerland after taking her disabled husband on a trip to India and leaving him there – to save on care costs.

    According to a report in the Daily Mail, the 65-year-old showed her husband videos of “palm-fringed beaches and luxury hotels” to convince him to go there.

    The woman, a currency trader from Bassersdorf, then took the 74-year-old out of a £6,000 a month retirement home in Switzerland to a poverty-stricken suburb of New Delhi – and reportedly paid a family £1,500 a month to take him in.

    She then returned to Switzerland and did not contact him again. The man died in November 2008, eight months after he’d arrived in January.

    According to The Local, the cantonal high court found that the home in Punjab was not equipped to provide the medical care necessary for the man, who suffered with dementia and was severely disabled.

  29. 40
    Where did I put those Christmas cards last year says:

    Bloody Mayans!

  30. 41
    I think we've been here before ...many many many times says:

  31. 42
    Let it die says:

    I wouldn’t wipe my arse on the Garinadu. Bargepole is the word that comes to mind…

  32. 50
    Serious Question says:

    I mean who in their right mind names their child Neon?

  33. 53
    God says:

    The passage of time is just a figment of your imaginations

  34. 58
    Doomwatch says:

    Planetary Alignments: Nil
    Four Horsemen: Nil
    Rapture: Nope
    Magnetic field reversals: Compass still pointing north
    Killer Ast*roid(s): Nil
    Planet ‘X’ or Niburu: Still mythical
    Alien Invasion: No Vogons or Dogons
    Earthquake: Nothing on the USGS
    Floods: Some minor flooding, situation normal
    LHC Black Holes: None detected

  35. 77
    Thought for the Day says:

    What do you call alternative medicine that works?


  36. 83
    Guardian reading lefty says:

    I am so worried about the world ending.
    I have sodomised my boyfriend just in case.

  37. 89
    OnBenefits says:

    I’ve just got up and opened the curtains, and I can categorically confirm that here in North Wales at least, the world still exists.

    • 101
      HMMM says:

      What a shame!.

      • 108
        OnBenefits says:

        And, what’s more, we’re still 97.48% white

        • 175
          Archer Karcher says:

          I went into a Poundland in Llandudno once. That was about as close as I have ever come to the end of the world.

          • OnBenefits says:

            You are unkind. Poundland is a very salient reminder of how much the supermarkets rip us off.
            I buy all my garden birdseed and fat balls from that very store.

    • 107
      A philosopher says:

      Can we say, in a real sense, that being in North Wales is any sort of proof of existence?

      I think not.

      • 114
        René Descartes says:

        Therefore I am not.

      • 116
        OnBenefits says:

        No more proof than anywhere else, I would imagine. Apart from being mosque-free, we have very little air or light pollution, the scenery is beautiful, the lamb is rather good, and we have more than our fair share of wind farms.

        Oh, I nearly forgot, we have our own ‘parliament’ and a very competent First Minister. It’s not all bad.

        Did I mention the sheep?

        • 135
          Living in 96.98 percent white Merseyside says:

          And with a pair of bonoculars you could see the Liverpool Skyline if it wasn’t for the ‘ills inbetween!

          • Moussa Koussa's pet meerkat says:

            No hills between Kinmel Bay beach and Seaforth, which is just about visible. Worked in Bootle for 5 years (90 – 95) (building industry) just next to the Giro. At other times on and off Kirkby, Huyton, Cantril Farm, Page Moss, Halewood.
            Fond memories…

        • 140
          Living in 96.98 percent white Merseyside says:

          Sorry binoculars.

      • 119
        The Welsh National House Burners Association says:

        Where do you live?

      • 191
        OnBenefits says:

        Reflect on this. You can buy a two-bedroom flat overlooking the beach and sea in Rhyl for £50k.
        And before you say Rhyl is a shithole, it’s no worse than many parts of London or other provincial towns and cities.
        And we’re 97% white.

    • 194
      Jones the Steam says:

      I am Welsh, therefore I claim.

      JSA, Housing, Incapacity-to-speak-coherently, Sheep-dagging, Orange chips and a big TV to watch the Eisteddfod and continual repeats of Gareth Edwards scoring THAT TRY.

  38. 90
    The Museum of Socialism says:

    Why are museums free and subsidised by the state?

    I can see no logic in this at all. And we are now seeing chancers using the special privileges that museums enjoy the same way that chancers use charities.

    • 154
      Living in 96.98 percent white Merseyside says:

      In the case of art galleries if they have paintings loaned by the late Sir Dennis Mahon they would lose them if they charged admission. Museums on Merseyside starting charging admission for a while in the 1990′s and he promptly withdrew the Italian baroque paintings he had loaned. There are many in The National Gallery, especially Guercino, Reni and Giordano, that were part of his superb collection.

      Culture for the masses. You ought to see all the chavs wandering around The Walker.

  39. 97
    Bernard Hogan hyphen How says:

    Next week I will be visiting the Ministry for Silly Names.

  40. 121
    Bogeyman says:

    I wonder how many people (like myself) go the the Graun’s website not for information but out of sheer astonishment at the pronouncements of the Left.

    Rustbugger is a clever chap. His policy is to fill it with extreme “progressive” dialogue designed to make sensible readers gasp. It is actually a form of pornography.

    • 159
      Watcher says:

      Rather belatedly, he’s discovered the idea of putting up stuff about Eastenders, and other TV programmes for the plebs, to try to up the click rate.

    • 211
      Mark Skid says:

      I too, go to the Guardian just to remind myself what utter scum lefties are. All I want for Christmas is the Guardian to go tits up, so maybe I should refrain, and just take it as a self evident truth that lefties are degenerates.

  41. 124
    Moussa Koussa Mark 3 says:

    Remember the good old days when ALL those who served within the police force voted Tory…errrr not anymore

    In fact who does…The over 70’s middle / upper class is your only true core now.

    • 127
      Labour terraforming a town near you soon says:

      Labour, a system of government where the least capable to lead are elected by the least capable of producing, and where the members of society least likely to sustain themselves or succeed, are rewarded with goods and services paid for by the confiscated wealth of a diminishing number of producers.

    • 133
      Moussa Koussa's pet meerkat says:

      Do the farmers still vote for them?

      • 150
        Moussa Koussa Mark 3 says:

        I doubt it

        • 186
          Archer Karcher says:

          Who gives a flying f*ck about the tories around here? They lost it years ago and are now just a pale imitation of Bliar and Ed’s ‘third way’ fascist party.

    • 146
      The Fourth Way says:

      Moose old chap. How does it feel being part of a core of Owen Jones, Diane Abbotts and Sally Bercows?

      You are right about the Tories though, they are dead, long live UKIP.

  42. 128
    The bruvvas says:

    Former miners’ leader Arthur Scargill loses High Court fight with National Union of Mineworkers over cost of his London flat

  43. 129
    George Osborne says:

    Why doesn’t the ice cream van ever come up Downing Street?

  44. 132
    Moussa Koussa Mark 3 says:

    Guido site in full:

    Something about the Guardian
    Something about the BBC
    Something about Boris

    Guido…you have an almost autistic obsession with the above.

    PS latest polls put you in the high 20’s…..oh dear

    Keep on obsessing about pointless stuff, enjoy what is left of your one term.

    Merry Christmas

    • 136
      Labour terraforming a town near you soon says:

      Labour, a system of government where the least capable to lead are elected by the least capable of producing, and where the members of society least likely to sustain themselves or succeed, are rewarded with goods and services paid for by the confiscated wealth of a diminishing number of producers.

    • 141
      Anonymous says:

      Moussa Koussa Mark 3, the only mark that doesn’t improve with time.

  45. 134
    armaggedon says:

    Why don’t the Guardian publish stuff that people actually want to read, it’s not fucking rocket science?

    • 138
      Guardian Reader from a Yurt in North Korea says:


    • 151
      A Grouniad - reading deconstructionist spouting structural babble says:

      It’s a contemporary take on an old well-known but now deconstructed . .. blkah balh balh babble

  46. 148
    One eyed jock imbecile. says:

    I hope Owen Jones has a nice stress free Christmas, the shitty arsed little brat.

    • 152
      McBonkers continues - says:

      - I shall spend Christmas with a large carrot up my arse

    • 161
      Owén Jónes says:

      I shall spend Winterval planning the Socialist revolution; I will type copious notes on the Macbook Pro my mummy’s bought for me on Amazon.. I will include key elements from the political philosophy of my progressive Hamas comrades/heroes, particularly enforced female genital mutilation and the extermination of kweers.

    • 167
      Owén Jónés says:

      I shall spend Winterval planning the Socialist revolutíon; I will type copious notes on the Macbook Pro my mum’s bought for me on Amazon.

      I will include key elements from the political philosophy of my progressive Hámas comrades/heroes, particularly enforced female genítal mutilatíon and the extermínation of kwéers.

    • 182
      Owen Jones says:

      me and my latest will sodomise each other while dressed as the village people.

  47. 155
    Hitler revisited says:

    Can the police legally seize a young boy and force him to have his brain cut open and irradiated?

    • 172
      I hate shopping says:

      I don’t know about the police, but personally I think about doing that every time I have to go to Tesco.

    • 174
      I hate shoppíng (and the m 0/db 0t) says:

      I don’t know about the políce, but personally I think about doing that every time I have to go to Téscó.

  48. 160
    Shafted by one of our own says:
  49. 164
    Gordon Brown says:

    I wish everyone a safe and happy December 21st.

  50. 176
    Jimmy says:

    I’ve always thought of this site as live blogging the End of Civilization.

  51. 181
    Hanukkas Bazzokas (A Greek Gentleman) says:

    It’s the precession, stoopid!

  52. 185
    Uncommon Purpose says:

    Just heard Pesto on Radio 2 jeremy vine show talking about jewellry of huge sentimental value which has been stolen from his house. I wouldn’t wish this kind of burglary on anyone, least of all when it involves items which were owned by his late wife. But thefts like this are occurring all over the UK every single day. Most people don’t have the luxury of being able to appeal to millions of BBC radio listeners for its return. They instead have to rely on police too busy chasing ageing celebrities and ministers, and the weak sentencing of a liberal judiciary which offers virtually no deterrent to criminal, marauding scum who prey on the public for their drug and beer money. Something for the common purpose comrades to consider at their next gathering?

  53. 189
  54. 198
    Traditional Champion of the Working Class says:

    Speaking of nauseating leftist hypocrites, King Arthur Scargill has failed in his attempt to keep an NUM London flat for his life and post mortem the life of his wife. Worthy of comrade Bob Mugabe – a fellow marxist.

    “The NUM said the flat cost £34,000 a year, which it could not afford.”

    More than my take home pay. From 1982 to 1985, and 1991 to 2011

  55. 200
    Truthteller says:

    The Mayan Calendar and Global Warming, how much more of this chicanery.

    • 202
      Something else which might as well not exist says:

      Could you add Gideon’s deficit forecasts to the list please?

  56. 203
    The grinding lunatic says:

    @theRumpDiary My axe is nice and sharp now – where do you want it?

  57. 210
    keredybretsa says:

    Perhaps they’ll write their own Obituary?

  58. 219
    But man cannot live by birdseed and fatballs alone says:


  59. 221
    Anonymous says:

    Lets watch the great and the good drown in their own runny excrement,ie royals daily mail ,church of England ,British Army ,MI5, MI6 ,police and all the other tory establisment types who rob us and ruin us

Media Reader

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Guido-hot-button (1) Guido-hot-button (1)

Rod Liddle on the loony UN sexism special rapporteur:

“There is more sexism in Britain than in any other country in the world, according to a mad woman who has been sent here by the United Nations.

Rashida Manjoo is a part-time professor of law at Cape Town University in the totally non-sexist country of South Africa (otherwise known as Rape Capital Of The World).

Mrs Magoo has been wandering around with her notebook and is appalled by the sexist “boys’ club” culture here, apparently.

I don’t doubt we still have sexism in the UK. But is it worse than in, say, Saudi Arabia, d’you think, honey-lamb? Or about 175 other countries? Get a grip, you doolally old bat.”

orkneylad says:

What’s he been doing FFS, mining bitcoins?

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