December 6th, 2012

WATCH: Clifford: “Never Asked for Anybody’s Birth Certificate”

Sky New’s Steve Dixon had the prophetic interview with Clifford in October:

He asked the PR guru whether he was compromising himself and Clifford explained that in the sixties people “never asked  for anybody’s birth certificate.”

“All kinds of things went on and I do mean young girls throwing themselves at them in their dressing rooms at concert halls, at gigs, whatever. They never asked for anybody’s birth certificate and they were young lads … suddenly everyone’s dream was a reality.”

Worth a watch given today’s news of his arrest


  1. 1
    Kebab Time says:

    He knows where the bodies are buried!

  2. 2
    Sally Bercow says:

    I’m an open book **innocent face**

  3. 3
    Maqboul says:

    He’ll need a good PR agent.

  4. 4
    Nonce Finder General says:

    Another Tory bites the dust.

  5. 5
    Sir William Waad says:

    I wonder what he meant by getting himself arrested?

  6. 6
    Frozen stiff says:

    Tax avoidance schemes, such as the one used by comedian Jimmy Carr, are “completely and utterly immoral”, Margaret Hodge, chair of the Public Accounts Committee (PAC), has said.

    Tell that to Stemcor you thieving bitch.

  7. 7
    McBride says:

    I will do it Pro Bono

  8. 8
    Henry Brubaker says:

    Arrange the following words into a satisfying sentence.


  9. 9
    Piers Morgan says:

    Oh shit, I bet I’m next

  10. 10
    Jezzer says:

    UK new car registrations rose 11.3% in November from a year ago, putting them on course for their highest full-year total since 2008, new data suggests.

    What fucking recession.

  11. 11
    Rupe says:

    You sure are cobber.

  12. 12
    That fecking thick can't even think for himself says:

    Stolen from 13 of previous Post

  13. 13
    Motability says:


  14. 14
    Since when has immoral been illegal says:

    Stupid comment from her, just pandering to the ne’er-do-wells

  15. 15
    Kebab Time says:

    I dont steal comments.

    He’ll be needing a good PR man to spin this for him. Can I suggest McBride?

  16. 16
    An ordinary member of the skint public says:

    I hope he gets what he deserves, and also the fuckers he’s protected.

    The worrying thing is that he probably knows some gruesome stuff and will still manage to keep it hidden. I despair at what some people will do for money.

  17. 17
    Eddie Boys Bandwagon Tour says:

    how disgusting to mention good news…count yourself duly scolded

  18. 18
    That fecking thick can't even think for himself says:

    I much prefer your website to the sockpuppets one above :)

  19. 19
    I don't nee d no doctor says:

    Gordon Brown has offered to be Max Clifford’s PR Guru.

  20. 20
    George Gideon Oliver says:

    Inconvenient this Max, I’m going to have appoint someone else.

  21. 21
    Steve Miliband says:

    Free motors from motability. Only people with new cars

  22. 22
    Prince 'arry says:

    What’s a birth certificate?

  23. 23
    John Lennon says:

    Instant Karma’s gonna get you
    Gonna look you right in the face
    Better get yourself together darlin’
    Join the human race
    How in the world you gonna see
    Laughin’ at fools like me
    Who in the hell d’you think you are
    A super star
    Well, right you are

    PS I’m not available..Boo sucks rozzers!

  24. 24
    Anonymous says:

    Children in need raised £26,000,000 a few weeks ago as well !

  25. 25
    I don't nee d no doctor says:

    Ed Balls blamed his stammer for his poor showing yesterday in the HOC. Surely if you have a stammer you don’t say the wrong words, only stutter them.
    Let’s hope labour stick with Millionaireband and Balls.

  26. 26
    Brony Blair says:

    Gordon is used to turning a blind eye.

  27. 27
    JabbaTheCat says:


  28. 28
    Eddie Boys Bandwagon Tour says:

    crap autumn statement … missed every single one of their key measures spelt out after the 2010 election… we can’t give you any idea what we would do but nevertheless will continue to carp on regardless proving we are totally flexible in approach to getting the great unwashed to put us back in power shortly.

  29. 29
    Cow says:

    Moo ?

  30. 30
    dna checker says:

    Ask James Hewitt.

  31. 31
    Anonymous says:

    scary stuff.

    let’s not be diverted from the explosive news via daily mail.
    those who hold child porn will do community service.

    it gets worse.
    better look into the sentencing council, whose chairman is the infamous Leveson.
    be shocked.

  32. 32
    The Edge says:

    Er, leave mi mate bono out of this.

  33. 33
    John Lennon says:

    My last hit was the pavement.

  34. 34
    Max says:

    But who can I turn to?

  35. 35
    Henry Brubaker says:

    Why do workshy spastics get new cars? What, cos they have a limp?

    Im neither a spastic nor workshy but I dont get given a free car.

    Im starting to think going-out-and-working thing is a bit of a mugs games. Seems Im paying for idle cuuunts to continue being idle.

  36. 36
    Red Egg Millitit..... says:

    Seems that any bloke who had sex in the 60’s and 70’s is likely to get knicked :)

  37. 37
    Legal Eagle says:

    A lawyer may be more helpful.

  38. 38
    Red Egg Millitit..... says:

    This is a great record, just wondering what the deeper meaning could be :)

  39. 39
    Fiscal Cliff says:

    He has a very serious debilitating condition known as ‘financial tyrrets’

    People cursed with this nasty condition tend to be swivel eyed, have a pallor like a coal miners arse crack, and utter complete gobshite when talking about subjects they have heard other people talk about. What is even more shameful is that he has had this condition for at least 15 years. I am afraid the only course of action is to euthanise him.

  40. 40
    Red Egg Millitit..... says:

    I wonder what happened to Rolf ?

  41. 41
    Louis The Roo says:

    Louis Theroux interviewed Savile AND Clifford.

    Anne Widdecombe must be shitting herself.

  42. 42
    OnBenefits says:

    He was as untouchable as Savile.

    But the little boy has taken his finger out of the dyke.

  43. 43
    Drum says:

    There is starting to get a McCarthy like mentality about all this.

  44. 44
    OnBenefits says:


  45. 45
    Nom Dom Nom 2 says:

    I have a relative (no longer in touch) who had the big C in her breast (she was old and smoked a lot). Fair enough during her therapy she could hardly breath and therefore walk so she got a motability car. Anyway she then got the all clear. That was over 10 years ago, last time I saw her she could walk round a fucking shopping centre faster than I could but still had a shiny fucking ford focus estate.

    F’ing ridiculous.

  46. 46
    That fecking thick can't even think for himself says:

    That’s going a bit far, I’m hardly likely to sue!

  47. 47
    OnBenefits says:

    According to the Guardian he’s suspected of ‘sexual offences’.

    So when he said a month ago he’s been inundated with celebrities’ calls, they must have been ringing to give HIM advice.


  48. 48
    Scratch n Sniff says:


  49. 49
    Gordon Brown says:

    I know Arry Potters mother, Mrs Rawplug.

  50. 50
    Steve Miliband says:

    Price of a cup coffee about to go up.Life is just a Ponzi scheme

  51. 51
    Anonymous says:

    when there is a big distraction watch what the establishment also known as Her Majesty is upto.

    It is Her Majesty’s Judiciary this time.
    via the sentencing council it is promoting the idea of sex with a 13 year old to be deserving of community service.

    In cases of sex with a 13-year-old, it said that where there was no grooming or other aggravating factors, ‘high level community orders’ can be given instead of the benchmark of four years in jail.

  52. 52
    Fiddling with my groin area says:

    ‘Can ya tell what it is yet?’

  53. 53
    Nom Dom Nom 2 says:

    And he did Jacko

    Case closed

  54. 54
    Gordon Brown says:

    I saw this coming and sold all the coffee at No10 and purchased Desani water from coca cola.

  55. 55
    Interested Public says:

    Only if the accuser feels inclined to file a criminal complaint with the police, and it is subsequently determined to be worth investigating further.

    The majority of these cases will be genuine and reflect the nastier side of what was going on back then – in particular the predatory stuff.

    Will be in interesting to see what he gets charged with.

  56. 56
    Do YOU know who I am? says:

    Another fella that repeats the phrase “you take me down, your certain pecadillo friends will be coming with me”.

    JEZZZUZ CHROIST! What sort of country are we with these perves having over-priveleged influence over us normals? No wonder we are fucked up. Clip for Max, from people in our land that speak sense,

  57. 57
    Nom Dom Nom 2 says:

    ‘Only if the accuser feels inclined to file a criminal complaint with the police, and it is subsequently determined to be worth investigating further.’

    You mean unlike previously when the plod and the DPP couldn’t be arsed you mean?

  58. 58
    Fubar Saunders says:

    Max, a Tory?

    You’re having a fucking laugh arent you? Max Clifford, a fucking Tory????


  59. 59
    King Edward says:

    the wettest year on record
    the coldest year on record
    the skintest year on record
    nhs waiting lists increasing
    nhs waiting times increasing
    poor people’s homes repossessed
    disabled people being killed at home
    royal familt have more kids

    must be a fucking tory government
    on the rich shall survive

  60. 60
    Riggsy Brown says:

    No surprise to anyone even vaguely connected with the red tops or (in the old days) the record industry. (Or to Guido, I believe). Max’s `remuneration package’ was never exclusively financial. Allegedly, of course!

  61. 61
    Jail the Murdoch Mob says:

    Any news on the secret justice Rebekah and Charlie Brooks were trying to obtain yesterday in a “private hearing” in Court?

    Has the Rule of Law broken down in Britain as well?

  62. 62
    Maqboul says:


    Preferential treatment for the Scots again. They already have the referendum denied the rest of the UK – to leave the EU.

    An independent Scotland would mean they have to reapply to join the UK then, in other words they get to vote to leave the EU not just the UK.

  63. 63
    IMHO says:

    Thought they were a not for profit organisation, sort of high street community service registered charity.

  64. 64
    Ed Balls says:

    And deficit up

  65. 65
    Nonce Finder General says:

    Well he voted for the one eyed mong, thus guaranteeing Liebor would lose.

  66. 66
    Do YOU know who I am? says:

    I need an agent. No, not Max, past his sell by date, I have heard – make sure it is one from Golders Green – they are kosher they are.

  67. 67
    Labourunionsbbc we are one says:

    Ratburger to the Royal Opera House. Does that mean he’s queing-up for the DG of Bbbc?

  68. 68
    Interested Public says:

    Yes. And also when the DPP explicitly stamped files ‘not in public interest’, and files were removed and destroyed, police told complainants that they were mistaken and would not be believed etc. etc. etc.

    My point was more that those who engaged in normal consensual stuff are likely fine as the parties involved would not be likely to come forward maliciously or for financial gain, as some of the spin has been trying to suggest.

    So the vast majority of adult men and women who were sexually active in the 60s/70s should have nothing to fear. Those that do have something to hide are a different story.

    This time round one hopes justice will be executed properly, but we have yet to see what happens when any of this gets to court.

  69. 69
    nigelforengland says:

    I’m looking forward to repeats of It’s A Knob Out

  70. 70
    Do YOU know who I am? says:

    Bangladeshi, from Brick Lane? OK, I’ll give him a go as well. They still sell bagels there? TIDY!

  71. 71
    How to Make Money says:

    Buy a £30,000 car with minor mobility modificatios.

    Pay no VAT – price comes down to £25,000.

    Remove minor mobility modifications.

    Sell car privately for £28,500.

  72. 72
    Nemesis says:

    Obnoxious bastard I hope all the allegations are true.

  73. 73
    Legal Eagle says:

    Sorry ‘That f**…’ – I meant for Mr. Clifford :-D

  74. 74
    Mad of Barking says:

    Where will this all end?

    Are the plod going to arrest every bloke who had sex in the sixties and seventies? The law then did not say that a man must be certain that the girl is of age as it does now.

  75. 75
    Taxfodder says:


    Some 50 odd years ago saw a young Taxfodder “out and about” pulling everything and anything that had a pulse and, was willing to drop their knickers (if they had them on in the first place) I can’t
    ever recall asking if they were old enough…. indeed ability, willingness and, stamina on my part seemed to be far more pertinent, than bothering about checking birth certs.

    Frankly I did not care how old only how able…. as I lay in the footwell of my Vauxhall Wyvern with Backseat Becky heaving away above me, age somehow just did not spring to mind…

  76. 76
    Sir William W says:

    I suppose he could be innocent.

    (Does the ‘nose trick’ with his tea….Lady Waad has to slap self on back to prevent choking)

  77. 77
    Roo Watcher says:

    Lest us not forget the Hamiltons…

  78. 78
    Anonymous says:

    interested public,

    you may wish to look at comment 51 below.
    the establishment has already revealed it’s hand….it is a few steps ahead.

    all the best.

  79. 79
    Labour Party Faithful says:

    You’re sure about this time – yes ?

  80. 80
    Sir William W says:

    Yes but the Bay City Rollers badges were a bit of a giveaway.

  81. 81
    Realist Baby Boomer says:

    He is of course right. It’s only with the development of the left wing Politically Correct industry that this has arisen.

  82. 82
    Gay of Manchester says:

    When will the plod start arresting all the homosexuals who had bottom sex before bottom sex became legal?

  83. 83
    Alleged Victims says:

    We want our Compensation money and have hired a no win no fee solicitor to get it

  84. 84
    Do YOU know who I am? says:

    His hundredth birth next year, next October, if you culture vultures fancy a trip to Swansea, or Laugharne,

    Try and make, but don’t worry if you can’t – I am sure he would not mind, at all. Just slug a drink for him in memorium, when the time comes.

  85. 85
    Anonymous says:

    A Vauxhall? How down market can you go.

  86. 86
    Revisionist History says:

    Honestly I find it funny, it just goes to show, the only way to win the game is not play it.

  87. 87
    Stuart Hall says:

    It’s a Cockout!

  88. 88
    Jimmy Savile, Gary Glitter, Freddie Starr, Andrew Lancel, Stuart Hall, Max Clifford says:

    You wanna be in our gang, our gang, our gang
    You wanna be in our gang
    Oh yeah

  89. 89
    Harry Hardon says:

    Ditto. I’ve always hated Clifford.

  90. 90
    mraemiller says:

    She was just 17, do you know what I mean?

  91. 91
    Interested Public says:

    Anonymous – yes saw the comment below – and most excellent point.

    Provided they end up with a criminal record and possibly some time on the sex offenders register – this is really good enough.

    Not that one condones it, but these people who are known and released into the community are not completely off of the hook. The Andrew Cunningham case is instructive.

  92. 92
    Jimmy Sa-vile says:

    My Rolls had wipe clean leather seats.

  93. 93
    Bye Bye Baby. says:

    The bay city rollers to be arrested?

    Thinking about it there were loads of teeny bopper groups back then. They wouldn’t last 5 minutes in today’s pc climate before the plod puts them on the sex offenders register.

  94. 94
  95. 95
  96. 96
    Bertie Acorn says:

    Is Guido on an extended lunch break?

  97. 97

    And Huge Grunt’s girlfriend.

  98. 98
    Max (I Nicked Alistair Darling's Stick On Eyebrows) Clifford says:

    Anyone know a decent spin doctor, when I say decent, I know that’s a bit of a contradiction, anyways, it’ll be cash, brown envelope etc if anyone can help me.

  99. 99
    Jimmy says:

    We will. And we will win.

  100. 100
    Do YOU know who I am? says:

    Not 15 and 364 days (365 in a leap year)?

  101. 101
    Anonymous says:

    I bet he’s glad she wasn’t 15.

  102. 102
    Please Please If Their Is A God and Tony Blair Says There Is So It Must Be So says:

    Wouldn’t it be great if Mandlescum was nicked, not for Operation Yewtree, obviously, but just for any reason whatsoever!!

  103. 103
    Touché says:

    Says the self congratulating sock puppet of 8illy 8umshire himself.

  104. 104
    mraemiller says:

    A spin doctor who treats himself has a fool for a promoter

  105. 105

    But don’t say anything to Chas – the last time he was questioned about this, it took him weeks to get the smell of brake fluid off his hands.

  106. 106
    Legs wide open. says:

    I was fifteeen, I blew your fucking brains out, it was illegal and I want paying out fucking big time.

  107. 107
    Anonymous says:

    This is completely over the top. You may as well arrest the members of every rock band that’s ever lived – well apart from Rob Halford. Just waiting for plod to knock on the door of Mick Jagger or Robert Plant, ” We have reason to believe you boned a 15 year old girl who wandered backstage to blow you when you were nineteen years of age.” Guilty m’lud and I’d like you to take another 2,385 cases into account.

  108. 108
    Roman Polanski says:

    I feel a film coming on! Amongst other feelings.

  109. 109
    Anonymous says:

    bit of triangulation going on.

    a) painful stuff for the recepient………….child abuse.
    b) gainful stuff for the establishment……issue sentencing guideline, child abuse.
    c) all to be forgotton, soon,,,,,,,,,,,………the royal couple look so glorious.

    so we are being told,
    ok to have your soul abused and spirit removed.
    let’s focus on the glory that is the royal couple.
    believe in nice fairy tales…but the reality is in the tampons and spidery writings of the heir to the crown.

  110. 110
  111. 111
    Do YOU know who I am? says:

    Question: How many got arrested for shop lifting? HA-HA, Get on google. And I don’t mean Madeeey and Finnigan nicking champers from tescies, at the bottom of their shopping cart past the till, and not too this old marvellous scottish bugger from brilliant time,

  112. 112
    Sally Bercow says:

    He has travelled to Thailand as EU Trade Commissioner – just saying **innocent face**

  113. 113
    Taxfodder says:

    In my part of the world on a Friday night (even in zero degrees) packs of scantily clad 13 year old girls roam the streets looking for young men to shag let alone groom..

    Grooming don’t come into it!

  114. 114
    BBC Pedo Ring says:

    Yes please!

  115. 115
    nambawan pikinini bilong Misis kwin says:

    Could not have happened to a nicer guy.

  116. 116
    Nice weather for no win no fee compo lawyers says:

    Wish the plod would put the same effort into investigating current crime, like Muslim grooming gangs.

    All this going back to the past started with Blair when he went around apologising for things that happened ages ago.

  117. 117
    Do YOU know who I am? says:

    Shoplifting anyone? One of them above was one of those, like an old forgetful grannie in tescies, but not champers Madeley and Finnigan, neither this scottish musical genius,

  118. 118
    Do YOU know who I am? part two says:

    Shoplifting anyone? One of them above was one of those, like an old forgetful grannie in tescies, but not champers Madeley and Finnigan, neither this scottish musical genius,

  119. 119
    orkneylad says:

    He may know where the bodies are buried, but does anyone else remember what happened to Robert Greene’s ‘blacke booke’ after he ate too much herring and rennish wine?

  120. 120
    IMHO says:

    I know just the job for you Sally, Max Cliffords.

  121. 121

    Don’t you fuckin.g start! I deleted that movie – ooops! Er, er… I’ve never heard of that movie I deleted!

  122. 122
    The Sleeper says:

    Bet Jerry Lee Lewis won’t be doing a revival concert over here in the near future….

    ….”Great Balls of Fire” would take on a whole new meaning.

  123. 123

    Oi, Spuddy!

    “the wettest year on record
    the coldest year on record
    the skintest year on record
    nhs waiting lists increasing
    nhs waiting times increasing
    poor people’s homes repossessed
    disabled people being killed at home (WTF?)
    royal family have more kids (And the “poor” are not?)

    must be a fucking tory government”…..

    trying to sort out the all of the shit left behind from 13 years of LieBore lies and criminal mismanagement. And guess who gets the blame…… no, go on, guess.

  124. 124
    Red Egg Millitit..... says:


  125. 125
    Anon E Mouse says:

    A jail term and your name in the sex offences register

  126. 126
    2112 says:

    Apart from whistling in the dark, what other hobbies do you have?

  127. 127
    Just asking says:

    Are you reading all this Handy? Can we be sure it was only a kiss and a cuddle?

  128. 128

    And Gordmong’s former arse licker BallsUp is the one to tell the country how to do it – honestly, it would be like Jimmy Savile being put in charge of Operation YEW TREE.

    (Just as dead from the neck up as well.)

  129. 129
    John Lennon says:

    That came from the last 45 I heard.

  130. 130

    They need one or the other to survive – The Leaping Salmon must be feeling a cold wind up his musty kilt, ye ken! He’ll have to go and have a long think on his upturned bucket to work this one “oot”.

  131. 131
    Anonymous says:

    so they are asking for it….

    this cannot be right.

  132. 132
    Roman Polanski says:

    I can prove that one can go into 13 twice

  133. 133
    Nonce Patrol says:

    You trying to normalise pedophilia tax fodder?

  134. 134
    Comp & Sation says:

    We pay out by the inch and how fast you blew.

    So how wide open were your legs and how quick were you?

  135. 135
    Mr BumBum says:

    2,385 would only be specimen charges.

    Poor old Mick’s hardly got any knob left, so the total is probably nearer 23,850.

  136. 136
    Anonymous says:

    the power is not with the celebs. celebs are a stupid distraction. serious stuff is elsewhere,

    if we are serious about improving our lives then we have to see this
    probably take 7 years to internalise and then another 7 to detach.

  137. 137
    Anon says:

    I bet alot more Police corruption stories are going to surface in the papers now, watch out boys in blue, once you’ve scorned a man with power like Clifford there are consequences.

  138. 138
    Mark Skid says:

    The Upstart Crow nicked it.

  139. 139
    Watcher1 says:

    That sounds like Gidiot too.

  140. 140
    Yup, me again. says:

    Was your Ford Popular?

  141. 141
    Petrolhead says:

    You naughty Imp

  142. 142
    Fender Bender says:

    So, Mr Tax(i), been a bit of a wild Rover have you? Tut!

  143. 143
    Fender Bender says:

    Wasn’t Gordon’s beard some sort of PR guru before they were “married”?

  144. 144
    Joo Dishal says:

    That’s not good for the hairdressers then (like what most of them probably are or will be).

  145. 145
    Play Gerist says:

    As was said when you said that the first time round,”that must have been a relief to her”. Do try not to replicate idiotisms, there’s a good lad.

  146. 146
    Speedos says:

    What? Like Huhne’s you mean?

  147. 147
    Speedos says:

    Way back when I seem to recall a No 1 hit entitled “She was only 16″. But can’t remember who sang it (or be bothered to Guglit).

    Those were the days my friend, we thought they’d never end….

  148. 148
    Anonymous says:

    well done guido you beat them to it again

  149. 149
    WobblyJim says:

    no, but could a deal have been done that handed MC’s head on a plate ?

    /goes long on the popcorn.

  150. 150
    That guy who loved the 60's says:

    Looks like a pogrom on white males of mature years. I wonder how many ghosts are gonna rise up from the back of my car.

  151. 151
    Jerry Lee Lewis says:

    Pedophilia is to do with pre-pubescent girls and boys. That’s just sick.

  152. 152
    Young black woman says:

    Yup, get the old white guys. They’re witches, burn them.

  153. 153
    George Osborne's bullshite crap Statement says:

    Liquid lunch and a warm pasty?

  154. 154
    George Osborne's bullshite crap Statement says:

    26? still don’t get it

  155. 155
    gadd about town says:

    Hope the smug f***** goes down for this….oh he already did (sloppy seconds)

  156. 156
    TONY BENN,S WILL says:

    Is that called withholding evidence of a crime?

  157. 157
    TONY BENN,S WILL says:

    Lightening conductor or what?

  158. 158
    Smell the glove says:

    I mean back in the day all the chicks dressed provocatively and because I represented all the big stars I had to act as a barrier for my clients to make sure that any stories about under age sex never got in to the papers. There is no way that I benefited from this situation.Honest

  159. 159
    Stir my old La Tene Alp pot says:

    How to make money? Easy.

    Buy a small refrigerated van, and sell fresh fish – local town market for deliveries from Brixham/Grimsby/etc, or Bilingsgate if closer. Like these two entraupreneurs, however you spell it. Got to be fresher than the crap they sell in those supermarkets,

  160. 160
    Morris Minor says:

    Sex with Minors is wrong.

  161. 161
    Harry Benn's Pig says:

    I sure hope so

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