November 16th, 2012

Friday Caption Contest (Taxi for Mensch Edition)


  1. 1
    Freeemasons says:


  2. 2
    libdom says:

    Why’d I leave my trouser press behind?

  3. 3
    Anonymous says:

    my other car is a Ferrari.

  4. 4
    Roundell says:

    sometimes driving on the pavement can be justified

  5. 5
    Tom says:

    You are supposed to raise a hand or whistle it’s not a HACKney cab

  6. 6
    David says:


  7. 6
    Kebab Time says:

    “Hanson lead singer tries new PR Stunt”

  8. 8
    Legal alien says:

    My husband says that I think I won’t be able to hail a cab

  9. 10
    Anonymous says:

    She can play with my paws anytime

  10. 12
    Anonymous says:

    I still would

  11. 13
    Corrie L'Anus says:

    It’s so hard being a working mum you know…oops ….now where did I put those kids!!

  12. 14
    Voodoo Roy says:

    What’s the yellow thing in that picture.

    No, not the taxi…

  13. 15
    medici2471 says:

    This sure is a jolly holiday

  14. 16
    Anonymous says:

    “Oh dear, my right arm appears to have been torn off…”

  15. 17
    I am not answerable to Edinburgh arseholes says:

    Fuck off cow!

  16. 18
    HenryV says:

    Proof the world revolves around Louise.

  17. 19
    Jim S says:

    Don’t tell her that Piers Morgan drives a NY Taxi in his spare time.

  18. 20
    Liarpoliticians says:

    Mensch shows the way to Tories slow motion car crash 2015 general election.

  19. 22
    Steve Miliband says:

    Louise.Mary Poppins. Spoonful of sugar. QT revealations.

  20. 23
    Broadsword calling Danny Boy says:

    Is this what the Time Warp should look like?

  21. 24
    Cressida's Dick says:

    Just a spoonful of sugar helps Louise Mensch go down.

  22. 25
    SuffolkSimon says:

    yet another Tory MP abandons constituents for a (concrete) jungle

    • 107
      Selohesra says:

      As opposed to G Brown who abandons constituents for personal gain – at least she had the decency to allow someone else to represent them. And yes – I would

  23. 26
    nambawan pikinini bilong Misis kwin says:


  24. 27
    Liarpoliticians says:

    I* put this jumper on as the stripes go horizontally, to hide the vertical one down my back.

    * Mensch

  25. 28
    Justin Poofy Boots coming out of the closest in slow motion. says:

    What a useless waste of time she was. Spent most of her working life on twitter. Cut her thumbs off before she goes. Bytch.

  26. 29
    Mike Taylor says:

    Corby Limey Mary Poppins!

  27. 30
    übermensch says:

    you talkin’ to me?

  28. 31
    Yank Sinatra says:

    Start spreading the news
    I am leaving today
    I want to be a part of it
    Corby, Corby

  29. 32
    Steve Miliband says:

    Celebrations are a trifle early

  30. 33
    I've always thought Dalton is the best Bond says:

    Good to see I’m not alone on this.

    • 196
      Expat Geordie says:

      No, you’re not. I’ve always thought that Dalton was by far the best Bond. Craig second and then Lazenby third. Connery and Brosnan joint 4th/5th and the wordt of the lot – Moore.

  31. 34
    Vince Cable's rucksack says:

    Hookers usually smile AT the passing traffic, not towards the CAMERA.

  32. 35
    timdowns1 says:

    Is Cameron taking the pic? “Back a bit, no a bit further, bit further, keep going.”

  33. 37
    Sandy says:

    She arrived creating destruction all around her, and then left Corby just as malevolently to go to New York

  34. 38
    nasal ed says:

    now. where is my family?

  35. 40
    Anonymous says:

    Something that’s yellow and people ride on the inside, in front of a NY taxi cab.

  36. 41
    George Gideon Oliver Osborne says:

    LOUIS !

  37. 42
    TheLiarpoliticians says:

    I* am wearing this horizontally striped jumper, to hide the one vertical stripe down my back!

    * Mensch

  38. 43
    LETS DO IT says:


  39. 44
    Ryan in Switzerland says:

    Leaving for America secures 1 tory a deposit

  40. 45
    Jim S says:

    Michael Bloomberg, be very afraid…

  41. 46
    Hank the Cat says:

    Call me Dave in yellow cab screaming faster,faster to avoid talking to louise

  42. 47
    notareargunner says:

    “Somebody call me a cab.”
    “Okay….you’re a yellow vehicle on hire to any prick who wants you!”

  43. 50
    Andrew says:

    I’m sure that was one of my Corby constituents in that cab.. And I only wanted to shake hands!

  44. 52
    Snaplegs says:

    Unemployed ex-MP resorts to desperate measures to maintain cosmopolitan lifestyle

  45. 52
    renaldo says:

    looking for buiness love?

  46. 54
    Edinburgh junkie says:

    Sheeez a smack head.

  47. 55
    Sensible Simon says:

    “I’m Poppin’ in, then I’m Poppin off”

  48. 56
    C'mon - you can do better! says:

    Get ‘em out for the punters for Chri’s sake!

  49. 57
    Tom Tomos says:

    Asking only workman’s wages
    I come looking for a job
    But I get no offers….

  50. 58
    Corby Resident says:


  51. 59
    Jimmy says:

    She’s not the first to be asked by the public to go outside and play with the traffic, but so few really care so passionately about what the voters think.

  52. 60
    I Squiggle says:

    Um.. Sorry to tell you this Louise, but some joker put your name on a ballot for Police Commissioner in Staffordshire. With a grand total of 12 votes, you’re in. Report Tuesday?

  53. 61
    XXX says:

    Ooooh look, I am in Mary Poppinsland

  54. 64
    Anonymous says:

    ..and a big yellow taxi took away my old man.

  55. 65
    Stepney says:

    Mensch doing fcuk all useful.

    Business as usual.

  56. 66
    Gilmore's Gimps and socialists junkies says:

    I never liked her.

    *Stoney face*

  57. 67
    Gok Wan says:

    She is meant for the USA wearing those horrific shoes.

  58. 69
    Check Facts First says:

    OK DC, that was a good first attempt – bit more to the right next time.

  59. 70
    Steve Miliband says:

    Kerb your enthusiasm

  60. 71
    Tay King-dePisse says:

    Did anyone see that crane in the background and think, “I’m A Dinner Jacket”?

  61. 72
    Chick Clit says:

    Hi Kids and Hubbie I’m here ….

    “Hello…. Helllooooo, HEEELLLOOOOOO”

    “Where the hell is everyone?”

  62. 76
    Nonny Mouse says:

    Publicity whore frightens off kerb-crawlers!

  63. 77
    None of the above says:

    Realising she had been duped and the family had resigned to spend more time with Corby, Louise attempts to get a cab to JFK

  64. 78
    Lost decade? says:

    I am so off my face. What year is it? 2002? Everythings in slow motion. Must capitalise and profit by begging from midgets with tattoos on their magical foreheads for a whole decade. Follow the prophets.

    Time Wasters.

  65. 80
    EC1 PhD says:

    English tourist poses for photograph in New York

  66. 82
    filipinomonkey says:

    I’d give my right arm to get off class A drugs (probably).

  67. 83
    Oops! says:

    Now watch this post vanish!

    Chief R*bbi Lord Sacks issued a plea for “a continued prayer for peace, not only in Gaza but the whole region” – but later accused Iran of being part of the conflict, without realising he was live on Radio 4.

    Lord Sacks told BBC Radio 4′s Today programme: “No one gains from violence – not the Palestinians, not the Israelis. This is an issue where we must all pray for peace and work for it.” He was asked for his assessment of the situation in Gaza immediately after delivering the daily Thought for the Day on the programme. He initially responded: “I think it’s got to do with Iran, actually”, before being told he was live on air, when he made his call for a prayer for peace. The error caused some amused reaction on Twitter.

  68. 84

    Constituency Pop-in tries out for Mary Poppins.

  69. 85
    Steve mid says:


  70. 87

    Look. That has done 120,000 miles and they still let it ply for hire in NY.

  71. 88
    Grollace says:

    Big Apple. Och aye the Noo!

  72. 89
    Wyatt Bell says:

    I’m a celebrity, get me out of here. To my apartment, anyway.

  73. 91
  74. 95

    “my life is such a scream!”

    By Edvard Mensch

  75. 100
    Gonk III says:

    Whoosh ! Taxi or career

  76. 102
    toryhub says:

    Yellow streak?

  77. 103

    Last night, I discovered that DP does not stand for Democratic Party.

  78. 104
    IMHO says:

    Cherry picker gets a massive Mench on.

  79. 106
    Sue Brown for a lost decade. says:

    How would you feel if I was to
    kneel right down,
    at your feet, right now?
    Is the way it’s going to be from
    now until to forever,
    Let’s have less of getting clever
    with me
    Who would you blame for blowing
    the flame right out?
    Is it me?
    There is no doubt I can do what I
    want to do from
    now until forever,
    Let’s have less of getting clever
    with me
    You’re wasting your time
    and my time as well la la la living a
    I guess that time will tell.
    You’re making excuses
    ’bout the things you never done.
    Walking in circles, blinded by the
    Blinded the sun.
    Who would you blame for blowing
    the flame right out?
    Is it me?
    There is no doubt I can do what I
    want to do from
    now until forever,
    Let’s have less of getting clever
    with me
    You’re wasting your time
    and my time as well la la la living a
    I guess that time will tell.
    You’re making excuses
    ’bout the things you never done.
    You’re walking in circles, blinded
    by the sun.
    Blinded the sun.
    I don’t mean to sound unkind,
    to you.
    You just have to go and find
    something else to do.
    And don’t ask me what went wrong

    the list goes on and on and on and
    The list goes on and on and on and
    The list goes on and on.

  80. 109
    BBC Ticker - its such a laugh says:

    “David Cameron predicts that turnout for voting on police commissioners ‘will be much higher next time around”

  81. 114
    Tay King-dePisse says:

    “As long as I’m in Times Square, let me pop over a block to Avenue of the Americas and see Jamie Murdoch at FOX and tell him, no hard feelings, OK?”

  82. 116
    Eric Clapton's plectrum says:

    “I caused a by-election bloodbath? Hey, don’t Mensch-un it!”

  83. 121
    Lady Gaga's ass says:

    I prefer New York to eating camel toes…

  84. 123
    Steve Miliband says:

    I’m a Celebrity, get me into here!

  85. 124

    Look. You have two offers. That bint at the top or Sally Bercow. Hotel paid for…

    How chose you?

  86. 125
    Penny For The Guy says:

    “Now, where’s that dive I’m supposed to meet Laurie Penny in?”

  87. 126
    Ron says:

    since mensch left these shores she’s been in the media every fucking day

    meanwhile cameron is claiming all police commissioners have a mandate for their new office – unlike him of course who’s party didn’t even make the finishing line – typical eton tory gobshite

  88. 128
    Edinburgh is in crisis. I don't give a shit says:


  89. 131
    YorkshireLad says:

    I became Crown Steward and Bailiff of the Chiltern Hundreds to spend more time with my family…Hey, where are they? I’m sure I left them around here somewhere

  90. 132
    stroppycow says:

    Little pip meets Big Apple.

  91. 133
    dunstall says:

    New York,New York what a wonderful town,Corbys been won by a Labour clown.

  92. 134
    old 1970s curmudgeon says:

    New York Dolls reform with release of “lipstick killers”

  93. 135
    YorkshireLad says:

    “Shit, I left my kids at the Chilton Hundreds and I’m Steward of the Manor of Northshead”

  94. 136

    Peter Mandelson wants an In/Out?

    Are you sure?

  95. 138
    Baffled says:

    Does my ego look big in this?

  96. 143
    IMHO says:

    Back to the future DeLorian in futile attempt to reach 80 MPH in New York traffic.

  97. 145
    idle says:

    Super Louie Fragile Dipstick Expat All Atrocious

  98. 147
    Drug Haze says:

    I am moving or the taxi?

  99. 148
    IMHO says:

    Hurricane Sandy, A fortnight too early?.

  100. 150
    I'm a British citizen get me out of here says:

    Corby or New York?

  101. 151
    UK Uncunt – the campaign to deport Peter Mandelson says:

    Self-publicist waits for Ryan Gosling to arrive before stepping out in front of taxi

  102. 152
    Marian Keyes says:

    I predict a return to chick-lit.

  103. 153
    fitaloon says:

    Just Poppin Out, May be some time

  104. 156
    Tom Catesby says:

    God Damn, just missed her!

  105. 157
    Weybridgeman says:

    Bye, Bye, Bye”

    (Hey, Hey)
    Bye, Bye, Bye
    Bye, Bye…
    Bye, Bye…
    Oh, Oh..

    I’m doin’ this tonight,
    You’re probably gonna start a fight.
    I know this can’t be right.
    Hey baby come on,
    I loved you endlessly,
    When you weren’t there for me.
    So now it’s time to leave and make it alone
    I know that I can’t take no more
    It ain’t no lie
    I wanna see you out that door
    Baby, bye, bye, bye…

    Bye Bye
    Don’t wanna be a fool for you
    Just another player in your game for two
    You may hate me but it ain’t no lie,
    Baby, bye, bye, bye…
    Bye Bye
    Don’t really wanna make it tough,
    I just wanna tell you that I had enough.
    It might sound crazy,
    But it ain’t no lie,
    Baby, bye, bye, bye

    (Oh, Oh)
    Just hit me with the truth,
    Now, girl you’re more than welcome to.
    So give me one good reason,
    Baby come on
    I live for you and me,
    And now I really come to see,
    That life would be much better once you’re gone.

    I know that I can’t take no more
    It ain’t no lie,
    I wanna see you out that door
    Baby, bye, bye, bye…
    Bye Bye
    Don’t wanna be a fool for you
    Just another player in your game for two
    You may hate me but it ain’t no lie,
    Baby Bye, bye, bye…
    Bye Bye
    Don’t really wanna make it tough,
    I just wanna tell you that I had enough (ooh ooh)
    It might sound crazy,
    But it ain’t no lie,
    Baby, bye, bye, bye

    I’m giving up I know for sure
    I don’t wanna be the reason for your love no more
    Bye Bye
    I’m checkin’ out
    I’m signin’ off
    Don’t wanna be the loser and I’ve had enough

    Don’t wanna be your fool
    In this game for two
    So I’m leavin’ you behind
    Bye, bye, bye…

    I don’t wanna make it tough (wanna make it tough)
    But I had enough
    And it ain’t no lie (Bye, bye baby…)
    Bye, Bye
    Don’t wanna be a fool for you
    Just another player in your game for two (I don’t wanna be your fool)
    But it ain’t no lie
    Baby bye, bye, bye…

    Don’t really wanna make it tough (don’t really wanna make it tough),
    I just wanna tell you that I had enough (that I had enough).
    Might sound crazy,
    But it ain’t no lie,
    Bye, bye, bye

  106. 158
    idle says:

    Pooper Louie Fragile Dipstick Expat All Atrocious

  107. 159

    I’m married to a celebrity – get me out of here.

  108. 160
    Never mind the bollox says:

    Hubby sent me out for the donuts. At least that’s what I thought he said

  109. 161

    Serious lover of your blog, a considerable number of your blog posts have really helped me out. Looking towards updates!

  110. 164
    Weygand says:

    I was christened Louise but everyone knows me as Mimi.

  111. 165
    Truly Menschonable says:

    I am the NEW Mary Poppins.

  112. 166
    John M says:

    Dont Menshn the by-election…

  113. 167
    Anonymous says:

    Well, I would still do her.

  114. 169
    the savant6 says:

    Loyalty to Party and Constituency my Tush…

    One Yellow cab and I m anybody s

  115. 170
    Anonymous says:

    I heard there was an erection going on – so thought I’d come over….

  116. 171
    Snotrocket says:

    When I came to the big Apple I thought of all the Cox….

  117. 172
    Baron Hogwash says:

    Screw you Corby!

  118. 173
    AnalStatistician says:

    “Taxi for Mr Murdoch! Taxi! And while I’m hear, do you want me to fetch you a coffee Mr Murdoch?”

  119. 174
    Charlies says says:


  120. 175
    keredybretsa says:

    I’M a Mensch Celeb. Get me out of here.

  121. 176
    Loosehead says:

    “How much for a round-the-world and a happy ending?”

  122. 177
    Tattooed_Arry says:

    “Tripping off my face”

  123. 178
    Hector says:

    “Polish your shoes guvnor”

  124. 179
    Mr Rotivator says:

    I’d get a cab but money’s too tight to mensch’n

  125. 181
    Travis Bickle says:

    All the animals come out at night – whores, skunk pussies, buggers, queens, fairies, dopers, junkies, sick, venal. Someday a real rain will come and wash all this scum off the streets. I go all over. I take people to the Bronx, Brooklyn, I take ‘em to Harlem. I don’t care. Don’t make no difference to me. It does to some. Some won’t even take spooks. Don’t make no difference to me. But I draw the line at Louise Mensch.

  126. 182
    robbie says:

    “I’m practically perfect in every way.”

  127. 183
    selfimportant says:

    I hope you’re not a journalist, but isn’t this where one can score some coke?

  128. 185
    Shaun Dyer says:

    “Honestly I’m not just a publicity seeker”

  129. 186
    bluerobbo69 says:

    Corby or New york? ERM……………….

  130. 187
    alexei says:

    Sexy maybe,unfortunately no Yellow cabs in Corby.

  131. 188
    Sir Mary Fappes says:

    ” Oh Golly. My Steely Dan. It’s Straining Mensch! “

  132. 191
    Astrologerthe says:

    Super cameron aint so expialidocious

  133. 192
    Derek & Clive says:

    Jump, you fucker, jump…..

  134. 193
    Oli says:

    “Rupert wherefore art thou?”

  135. 194
    DDC says:

    Don’t menschion the phwoar!!

  136. 195

    “The road to Times Square runs through Corby”

  137. 199
    Anonymous says:

    “That’s perfect, just 5 yards to your right.”

  138. 200
    Pervy hand Job says:

    She was just on Newsnight. And I just got in my last wank when she had her mouth open

  139. 201

    Which goes faster, Mensch’s cab away from Cameron or the lib dems Corby deposit?

  140. 202
    Pentangelis says:

    It Louise that’s moving – not the taxi!

  141. 203
    Will says:

    As in so many other areas of political life, Nadine Dorries always thought Louise Mensch should adopt a stance further to the right.

  142. 204
    Arthur Sixpence says:

    Try Crossing without looking

  143. 205
    Louise Mensch says:

    Taxi for Mensch or “superklalfragelisticexpialidotios, even though the sound of Mensch is simply quite atrocious”

  144. 210
    Hadrian (Emp.) says:

    When zip is bust, refrain from photo poses.

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Guido-hot-button (1) Guido-hot-button (1)

Cathy Jamieson MP, Labour’s Shadow Treasury minister, commenting on Treasury analysis of the economic impact of tax changes…

“If the Treasury is looking at the economic impact of tax changes, then surely it should examine the impact of the rise in VAT and cuts to tax credits? George Osborne’s £12 billion VAT rise knocked confidence, helped to choke off the recovery and has cost families £1,350 over the last three years.”

orkneylad says:

What’s he been doing FFS, mining bitcoins?

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