Friday Caption Contest (Taxi for Mensch Edition)
Secret of Farage’s Success | Prospect
It Was Beeb Not Tabloids That Smeared Help For Heroes | Speccie
Alternatives to Business For Britain Are Muppets | Charlie Mullins
Obama Counsel Knew of IRS Claims Weeks Ago | WSJ
Bunga Bunga Trial: Dancing Girls, Nuns, Nurses & Obama | Reuters
Dave Must Learn From Conan the Barbarian | James Kirkup
Tory Infighting Will Let Miliband In | The Commentator
Real Swivel-Eyed Loons Are in Number Ten | Telegraph
Bozier Accepts Caution | Political Scrapbook
Getting to Know U-KIP | ConservativeHome
Farage Telegraph Advert | Political Scrapbook
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Tom Harris bemoans the public’s attitude to politicians…
“Mr Oborne echoes the lazy, anti-politics whine we hear so often these days, all based on the absurd notion that politicians were once loved and only fell out of public favour during the expenses scandal. He should take a walk to the Strangers’ Bar. But not to sup with the patrons he seems to despise so much, dearie me, no; he should instead look at the paintings on the corridor outside the bar, which depict the devastating fire which consumed most of the Palace in 1834. And he should reflect on the fact that on that dramatic night, as the Commons went up in flames, a crowd gathered on the South Bank to clap and cheer.”
Harold Macmillan says:
” Evans, dear boy, Evans “
1st
“Looking for business, love?”
She cannot be blamed for putting her family first.
I thought Mayor Giuliani cleared all the prossies and smackheads out of Times Square?
Why do you want to insult someone who wants to put her family first?
If you want to blame anyone for the conservative loss blame Cameron.
Super Louie Fragile Dipstick Expat All Atrocious
Old Bag(shawe) says
The Corby town blues
are melting away
I gonna make a brand new start of it
In old New York
And the party that over-promoted me? The pleb constituents?
Cameron?
Meh…….
What with Louise moving to New York, and Nadine eating bugs in the jungle, things are a bit quiet at the Parliamentary Escort Agency. However, Sarah Teather will still do it for chocolate, so any interested punters are advised to nip into Thorntons before giving her a ring.
Unless she understood it was for 5 years…. (You fucking tool)
I give her marriage no more than few more years…. It will end in divorce! Then once she’s taken money from her ex she will be back in the UK presenting on the BBC, or heavens forbid trying to get re-elected. She’s not finished with us yet!
… and Spacker Brown wins!
I would pull my Roller over and give you a fondle and Savaloy. But you are far to old so best you wait for a buss.
The winner – no other entries needed.
GOOD ON YA GIRL, BEING A TORY MEANS BEING FREE!
and a peedo!
I’ve forwarded your UID to Lord McAlpine’s solicitors.
I withdraw the remark and apologise for my stupidity and lack of a dictionary.
Does my bum look big in this?
Mensch’s smug gittyness makes world rotate at 30mph under her feet.
Why’d I leave my trouser press behind?
“Want a good time, dearie?”
Corby, famous for the trouser press, gawd bless yer Mary Mensch
my other car is a Ferrari.
sometimes driving on the pavement can be justified
You are supposed to raise a hand or whistle it’s not a HACKney cab
#corbypride
Corby’s loss New York’s gain.
Or Corby’s gain is New York’s loss??
Corby, such a shit hole they named it once.
“Hanson lead singer tries new PR Stunt”
My husband says that I think I won’t be able to hail a cab
After a few years chasing Ruperts almighty dollah you will be able to get a limo luv.
She can play with my paws anytime
I still would
Me first.
Let’s have a menage a’ trois
It’s so hard being a working mum you know…oops ….now where did I put those kids!!
What’s the yellow thing in that picture.
No, not the taxi…
LM displays immense strength of purpose by staying in one place long enough to achieve this photographic effect.
winner
This sure is a jolly holiday
“Oh dear, my right arm appears to have been torn off…”
Fuck off cow!
Proof the world revolves around Louise.
I have to say, the winner
Don’t tell her that Piers Morgan drives a NY Taxi in his spare time.
Mensch shows the way to Tories slow motion car crash 2015 general election.
Louise.Mary Poppins. Spoonful of sugar. QT revealations.
Is this what the Time Warp should look like?
Just a spoonful of sugar helps Louise Mensch go down.
Or a couple G&Ts
yet another Tory MP abandons constituents for a (concrete) jungle
As opposed to G Brown who abandons constituents for personal gain – at least she had the decency to allow someone else to represent them. And yes – I would
Jump!
I* put this jumper on as the stripes go horizontally, to hide the vertical one down my back.
* Mensch
What a useless waste of time she was. Spent most of her working life on twitter. Cut her thumbs off before she goes. Bytch.
Corby Limey Mary Poppins!
+1
you talkin’ to me?
Start spreading the news
I am leaving today
I want to be a part of it
Corby, Corby
Disappointing breasts & bit pot-bellied.
I think I’ll pass on this occasion
Celebrations are a trifle early
It wasn’t a fucking trifle grrrrrrrrrrrrrr!!!!!!!!!
Good to see I’m not alone on this.
http://www.gq-magazine.co.uk/entertainment/articles/2012-11/08/timothy-dalton-the-best-james-bond-007
No, you’re not. I’ve always thought that Dalton was by far the best Bond. Craig second and then Lazenby third. Connery and Brosnan joint 4th/5th and the wordt of the lot – Moore.
Hookers usually smile AT the passing traffic, not towards the CAMERA.
Is Cameron taking the pic? “Back a bit, no a bit further, bit further, keep going.”
No, but Louise certainly took the piss!
She arrived creating destruction all around her, and then left Corby just as malevolently to go to New York
now. where is my family?
Something that’s yellow and people ride on the inside, in front of a NY taxi cab.
LOUIS !
E
I* am wearing this horizontally striped jumper, to hide the one vertical stripe down my back!
* Mensch
GOOOOOOOOOOOOOO ISRAEL.
Leaving for America secures 1 tory a deposit
Michael Bloomberg, be very afraid…
Call me Dave in yellow cab screaming faster,faster to avoid talking to louise
“Somebody call me a cab.”
“Okay….you’re a yellow vehicle on hire to any prick who wants you!”
I’m sure that was one of my Corby constituents in that cab.. And I only wanted to shake hands!
Unemployed ex-MP resorts to desperate measures to maintain cosmopolitan lifestyle
looking for buiness love?
Sheeez a smack head.
“I’m Poppin’ in, then I’m Poppin off”
Get ‘em out for the punters for Chri’s sake!
Asking only workman’s wages
I come looking for a job
But I get no offers….
“restricted from playback on certain sites”? thanks a bunch yt
Who?
She’s not the first to be asked by the public to go outside and play with the traffic, but so few really care so passionately about what the voters think.
Um.. Sorry to tell you this Louise, but some joker put your name on a ballot for Police Commissioner in Staffordshire. With a grand total of 12 votes, you’re in. Report Tuesday?
Ooooh look, I am in Mary Poppinsland
..and a big yellow taxi took away my old man.
Mensch doing fcuk all useful.
Business as usual.
I never liked her.
*Stoney face*
She is meant for the USA wearing those horrific shoes.
OK DC, that was a good first attempt – bit more to the right next time.
Kerb your enthusiasm
Sidewalk
Pavement?
Curb. Sidewalk = pavement.
Actually pavement = road, sidewalk = pavement. Where was she told to go play?
Actually, they spell it the same for both over there.
See 115. They spell it curb.
What we said, dipshit. “Curb” Your Enthusiasm and the “curb” of a street, the edge of the “sidewalk/pavement,” are “spelled/spelt” the same way.
Buy a clue.
Did anyone see that crane in the background and think, “I’m A Dinner Jacket”?
Nope, not moi.
Hi Kids and Hubbie I’m here ….
“Hello…. Helllooooo, HEEELLLOOOOOO”
“Where the hell is everyone?”
Publicity whore frightens off kerb-crawlers!
Winner!
Realising she had been duped and the family had resigned to spend more time with Corby, Louise attempts to get a cab to JFK
I am so off my face. What year is it? 2002? Everythings in slow motion. Must capitalise and profit by begging from midgets with tattoos on their magical foreheads for a whole decade. Follow the prophets.
Time Wasters.
English tourist poses for photograph in New York
I’d give my right arm to get off class A drugs (probably).
Now watch this post vanish!
Chief R*bbi Lord Sacks issued a plea for “a continued prayer for peace, not only in Gaza but the whole region” – but later accused Iran of being part of the conflict, without realising he was live on Radio 4.
Lord Sacks told BBC Radio 4′s Today programme: “No one gains from violence – not the Palestinians, not the Israelis. This is an issue where we must all pray for peace and work for it.” He was asked for his assessment of the situation in Gaza immediately after delivering the daily Thought for the Day on the programme. He initially responded: “I think it’s got to do with Iran, actually”, before being told he was live on air, when he made his call for a prayer for peace. The error caused some amused reaction on Twitter.
Lord Sacks of Shit.
He repesent them the occupiers and not us
He can’t help it
tat has a screaming hissy fit while desperately trawling yuotoob. why is this crap still here?
Constituency Pop-in tries out for Mary Poppins.
Suuuuckeers……
Look. That has done 120,000 miles and they still let it ply for hire in NY.
Big Apple. Och aye the Noo!
I’m a celebrity, get me out of here. To my apartment, anyway.
The Big Asshole
“my life is such a scream!”
By Edvard Mensch
I saw wnat you did there – chuckle.
NO NEED 2 APOLOGISE. SHE WAS INTELLECTUALLY!
Crippled. Speedy Gonzales.
Whoosh ! Taxi or career
Yellow streak?
Last night, I discovered that DP does not stand for Democratic Party.
Cherry picker gets a massive Mench on.
Well bowled.
How would you feel if I was to
kneel right down,
at your feet, right now?
Is the way it’s going to be from
now until to forever,
Let’s have less of getting clever
with me
Who would you blame for blowing
the flame right out?
Is it me?
There is no doubt I can do what I
want to do from
now until forever,
Let’s have less of getting clever
with me
You’re wasting your time
and my time as well la la la living a
lie,
I guess that time will tell.
You’re making excuses
’bout the things you never done.
Walking in circles, blinded by the
sun.
Blinded the sun.
Who would you blame for blowing
the flame right out?
Is it me?
There is no doubt I can do what I
want to do from
now until forever,
Let’s have less of getting clever
with me
You’re wasting your time
and my time as well la la la living a
lie,
I guess that time will tell.
You’re making excuses
’bout the things you never done.
You’re walking in circles, blinded
by the sun.
Blinded the sun.
I don’t mean to sound unkind,
to you.
You just have to go and find
something else to do.
And don’t ask me what went wrong
–
the list goes on and on and on and
on.
The list goes on and on and on and
on.
The list goes on and on.
I stopped reading at How.
Nice …er caption (?) – I think.
Seahorses’ lyrics?
“David Cameron predicts that turnout for voting on police commissioners ‘will be much higher next time around”
Yeah but he’s a knownothing fucking prick!!!!
Well to be fair it will not be any less than this time around
I also predict that sometime this evening it will go dark.
“As long as I’m in Times Square, let me pop over a block to Avenue of the Americas and see Jamie Murdoch at FOX and tell him, no hard feelings, OK?”
“I caused a by-election bloodbath? Hey, don’t Mensch-un it!”
I prefer New York to eating camel toes…
I’m a Celebrity, get me into here!
Look. You have two offers. That bint at the top or Sally Bercow. Hotel paid for…
How chose you?
Do you mind if I pass
sorry stroppystrumpet i get a little hard of hearing in the aftternoons
did you say
do you mind if i PISS
Can I take my iPad?
Can’t really get excited about either, nor the hotel, but having been a long-time fan of Jack Finney’s “Time and Again”, I’d be happy to accept a nice penthouse in the Dakota Building.
“Now, where’s that dive I’m supposed to meet Laurie Penny in?”
since mensch left these shores she’s been in the media every fucking day
meanwhile cameron is claiming all police commissioners have a mandate for their new office – unlike him of course who’s party didn’t even make the finishing line – typical eton tory gobshite
Whateva.
I became Crown Steward and Bailiff of the Chiltern Hundreds to spend more time with my family…Hey, where are they? I’m sure I left them around here somewhere
Little pip meets Big Apple.
New York,New York what a wonderful town,Corbys been won by a Labour clown.
New York Dolls reform with release of “lipstick killers”
“Shit, I left my kids at the Chilton Hundreds and I’m Steward of the Manor of Northshead”
Peter Mandelson wants an In/Out?
Are you sure?
Does my ego look big in this?
Back to the future DeLorian in futile attempt to reach 80 MPH in New York traffic.
Super Louie Fragile Dipstick Expat All Atrocious
I am moving or the taxi?
Hurricane Sandy, A fortnight too early?.
Corby or New York?
Choices,choices
Self-publicist waits for Ryan Gosling to arrive before stepping out in front of taxi
I predict a return to chick-lit.
Just Poppin Out, May be some time
God Damn, just missed her!
Bye, Bye, Bye”
(Hey, Hey)
Bye, Bye, Bye
Bye, Bye…
Bye, Bye…
Oh, Oh..
I’m doin’ this tonight,
You’re probably gonna start a fight.
I know this can’t be right.
Hey baby come on,
I loved you endlessly,
When you weren’t there for me.
So now it’s time to leave and make it alone
I know that I can’t take no more
It ain’t no lie
I wanna see you out that door
Baby, bye, bye, bye…
Bye Bye
Don’t wanna be a fool for you
Just another player in your game for two
You may hate me but it ain’t no lie,
Baby, bye, bye, bye…
Bye Bye
Don’t really wanna make it tough,
I just wanna tell you that I had enough.
It might sound crazy,
But it ain’t no lie,
Baby, bye, bye, bye
(Oh, Oh)
Just hit me with the truth,
Now, girl you’re more than welcome to.
So give me one good reason,
Baby come on
I live for you and me,
And now I really come to see,
That life would be much better once you’re gone.
I know that I can’t take no more
It ain’t no lie,
I wanna see you out that door
Baby, bye, bye, bye…
Bye Bye
Don’t wanna be a fool for you
Just another player in your game for two
You may hate me but it ain’t no lie,
Baby Bye, bye, bye…
Bye Bye
Don’t really wanna make it tough,
I just wanna tell you that I had enough (ooh ooh)
It might sound crazy,
But it ain’t no lie,
Baby, bye, bye, bye
I’m giving up I know for sure
I don’t wanna be the reason for your love no more
Bye Bye
I’m checkin’ out
I’m signin’ off
Don’t wanna be the loser and I’ve had enough
Don’t wanna be your fool
In this game for two
So I’m leavin’ you behind
Bye, bye, bye…
I don’t wanna make it tough (wanna make it tough)
But I had enough
And it ain’t no lie (Bye, bye baby…)
Bye, Bye
Don’t wanna be a fool for you
Just another player in your game for two (I don’t wanna be your fool)
But it ain’t no lie
Baby bye, bye, bye…
Don’t really wanna make it tough (don’t really wanna make it tough),
I just wanna tell you that I had enough (that I had enough).
Might sound crazy,
But it ain’t no lie,
Bye, bye, bye
Pooper Louie Fragile Dipstick Expat All Atrocious
I’m married to a celebrity – get me out of here.
Hubby sent me out for the donuts. At least that’s what I thought he said
Serious lover of your blog, a considerable number of your blog posts have really helped me out. Looking towards updates!
I was christened Louise but everyone knows me as Mimi.
I am the NEW Mary Poppins.
Dont Menshn the by-election…
Well, I would still do her.
Loyalty to Party and Constituency my Tush…
One Yellow cab and I m anybody s
I heard there was an erection going on – so thought I’d come over….
When I came to the big Apple I thought of all the Cox….
Screw you Corby!
“Taxi for Mr Murdoch! Taxi! And while I’m hear, do you want me to fetch you a coffee Mr Murdoch?”
Super-Mensh-thinks-New-York-move-is-OK-Corby-residents-thinks-its-attrocious
I’M a Mensch Celeb. Get me out of here.
“How much for a round-the-world and a happy ending?”
“Tripping off my face”
“Polish your shoes guvnor”
I’d get a cab but money’s too tight to mensch’n
All the animals come out at night – whores, skunk pussies, buggers, queens, fairies, dopers, junkies, sick, venal. Someday a real rain will come and wash all this scum off the streets. I go all over. I take people to the Bronx, Brooklyn, I take ‘em to Harlem. I don’t care. Don’t make no difference to me. It does to some. Some won’t even take spooks. Don’t make no difference to me. But I draw the line at Louise Mensch.
“I’m practically perfect in every way.”
I hope you’re not a journalist, but isn’t this where one can score some coke?
“Honestly I’m not just a publicity seeker”
Corby or New york? ERM……………….
Sexy maybe,unfortunately no Yellow cabs in Corby.
” Oh Golly. My Steely Dan. It’s Straining Mensch! “
Super cameron aint so expialidocious
Jump, you fucker, jump…..
“Rupert wherefore art thou?”
Don’t menschion the phwoar!!
“The road to Times Square runs through Corby”
“That’s perfect, just 5 yards to your right.”
She was just on Newsnight. And I just got in my last wank when she had her mouth open
Which goes faster, Mensch’s cab away from Cameron or the lib dems Corby deposit?
It Louise that’s moving – not the taxi!
As in so many other areas of political life, Nadine Dorries always thought Louise Mensch should adopt a stance further to the right.
Try Crossing without looking
Taxi for Mensch or “superklalfragelisticexpialidotios, even though the sound of Mensch is simply quite atrocious”
When zip is bust, refrain from photo poses.