November 15th, 2012

New Balls Please

Over the last year one of Ed Balls’ favourite lines has been to remind us that Britain was almost unique among our G20 friends in entering a double-dip recession. He gleefully twisted the knife in his conference speech, a column in the Tribune and various press releases, also reeling off the line in an op-ed for the Standard. Now that the Eurozone has fallen into a double dip this morning, it’s back to the drawing board.

A new hand gesture too, perhaps? 


  1. 1
    Hummper says:



    • 10
      Anonymous says:

      Problem is UK will end up have triple dip and it will be the 1st time. As for EU, it was implementing cuts like UK, so its not a surprise.


      • 17
        Anonymous says:

        The figure is ‘not a reliable guide to the future’, warned Sir Mervyn. He said: ‘Continuing the recent zig-zag pattern, output growth is likely to fall back sharply in the fourth quarter as the boost from the Olympics in the summer is reversed – indeed, output may shrink a little this quarter.’

        Read more:
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      • 21
        Anonymous says:

        In few years I will be surprised if UK would be considered a developed country.

        There needs to be fundamental changes to the economy and how services are given and paid for. Printing money can only last for few years before we ends up getting hyper inflation.


        • 76
          Engineer says:

          The public sector spends far too much. The real solution is a rebalancing so that tax-take as a proportion of GDP falls from about 43% (plus about 9% borrowed), to something nearer 35% (and maybe 2% borrowed). The private sector will then have a chance to compete with the rest of the global economy. Achieving this will take a couple of decades or so, provided we don’t get another tax-borrow-and-spend government in that time.


        • 113
          Nick says:

          Immigration also needs to be tamed and the criminal law needs to be feared once more.


      • 27
        Sir William W says:

        I know, what about borrowing even more and spending even more? We’ve never tried that before – it might just work!!!


        • 42
          Anonymous says:

          It might work some more years as it is working for US, China, Singapore, etc.

          It is like taking cards off a house build with cards, they are still building we (UK and EU) wants to take it off. Risk is greater when one is taking it off than still building.


      • 28
        Anonymous says:

        As the economy is mismanaged this country will not afford to provide free schooling, care, etc.


        • 34
          Sir William W says:

          There are no such things as free schooling and care. It’s a matter of who pays for them and how.


          • Anonymous says:

            Its paid by printing money and debt. Question is how long it can go on.

            It might be time to ask for payments to use it.

            Also this country cannot afford to keep subsidising pensioners just because they are more likely to vote.


          • Engineer says:

            The country doesn’t subsidise pensioners. Most of them live off pensions provided by the private sector. Those pensions are now going to cost far more for soon-to-be pensioners, mainly because of catastrophic economic mismanagement by the previous government.


          • Anonymous says:

            Engineer, who is paying for pension, care, medicines and hospitals? Billions can be saved.


        • 37
          The Public says:

          We can’t afford them now. They are being paid for by sending the bill to our great-grandchildren.


          • Anonymous says:

            our emotional bias says why?
            our wishfulthinking says why not.

            what should happen?
            what should be the decision criteria?

            are we a country divided by our emotional bias and wishfulthinking.
            this is what we need to unify.


          • The Public says:

            Stop talking gibberish. We can’t afford it.


          • Anonymous says:

            Why do you expect to have great-grandchildren. Irresponsible.


        • 72
          ÁC1 says:

          Er maybe it should get parents to pay for their children’s education rather than punishing taxpayers for working.

          The economy is mismanaged because of socialist subsidy like the above idiocy. BTW It’s only “free” if the workers volunteer, it’s extortion funded, not free.


        • 114
          Four-eyed English Genius says:

          Nearly as mismanaged as it was before 2010.


      • 57 says:

        Surely then it must be a mega surprise if austerity is linked to economic disaster that UK unemployment is trending down and GDP growth is 1.0% this quarter, beating both the Eurozone and the USA?


      • 80
        Anonymous says:



        • 87
          1984 says:

          Time for a quadruple and quintuple dip too before 2015.

          It’s a load of bollocks. It’s the same recession that kicked off in 2008. Some months we borrow and squander enough to give the illusion of ‘growth’ and some months we don’t.


      • 94
        P l e b says:

        New Chancellor please, preferably one with more real-world experience than towel folding.


      • 108
        Peter Grimes says:

        Fuckwit zanuliebor apologist. Its always different when you get your propaganda found out.


    • 24
      PM says:

      Don’t worry. He’ll move the agenda onto Britain’s triple-dip recession.


    • 39
      Professor says:

      There is only one hand gesture that suits Blinky … Chucking it over the thumb!


    • 60
      Evadne says:

      He may be a knobhead – but he’s MY knobhead!


    • 68
    • 77
      Pundit too too says:

      Two fingered salute to Balls Up should be mandatory for all media groups.
      Of course the BBC will support him.
      Could not believe that this morning on the Toady Programme had David Millipede discussing the future of China.
      Talk about the blind leading the blind.


    • 116
      Anonymous says:

      Are they all going to cling by their fingertips to their shadow posts for the next 3 years, without making any suggestions as to how they could do any better. Because if they do im glad to say they are toast !


    • 120
      Sir Barrington Minge says:

      He looks like one half of the Fat Slags…wait a minute… he IS a fat slag.


  2. 2
    Thuggie Whelan says:

    Do give me a call Eddyboy

    We must make up some more lies…

    PS Damian sends you his luv…


  3. 3
    Knobhead says:



  4. 4
    Clemenceau says:

    I said

    “War is too important to be left to generals”

    and I add that “Any country’s finances are too important to be left to lying spin doctors”


  5. 5
    Pollytwaddle says:

    New hand gesture?

    Two fingers!


  6. 6
    Hank the Cat says:

    Looks a bit limp wristed


  7. 7
    Dr Freud said all women suffer from penis envy says:

    You cannot turn utter balls into new balls

    You should know that by now Guido…


  8. 8
    This is what the BBC have done to an elderly man says:


    • 33

      The BBC are the chief purveyors of Frankfurt School cultural marxism to the masses. They are the propaganda arm of the Labour Party and operate, in league with smearers like the BIJ, to denigrate, demean, and destroy any political opposition that is not left wing.

      Why are millions of people still being forced, on pain of imprisonment, to fund this corrosive, anti-British, anti-white organisation of fifth columnists?


      • 38
        The Public says:

        The BBC should be shut down. In every revoluiton in Eastern Europe, the communist TV stations had to be put off air. We are in a similar position.


      • 78
        Guardianista Socialist Forum says:

        Do not forget us as we actually advise the BBC on their strategy and give them solutions to problems. IE We are their true boss.


  9. 9
    tube_thumper says:



  10. 11
    The Great Helmsman Xi Jinping says:

    I will bail out the UK if you sell us what is left of your industry and commerce

    As Gordon Brown told me during his wanderings

    It is the only thing to do


  11. 12
    English for Beginners says:

    “one of Ed Balls’ favourite lines”



  12. 13
    dog says:

    Are you free Mr Balls

    I’m Free


  13. 14
    Westminster Gossip says:

    Sad to say, no it’s not but, Ed Balls is so discredited it’s not worth reporting him!


    • 25
      An Ex-Conservative Party member says:


      Ed Balls is the only thing that stops me being certain of a Labour victory in 2015. And he’s the only thing that makes me worried about such a victory, too.


      • 83

        What!!! You think that his nasally-challenged glove puppet looks an electable statesman?
        In the infamous words of John McEnroe “YOU CANNOT BE SERIOUS?!”


        • 111
          Labour Spokesperson says:

          Be fair, he can only learn three lines at any time and getting a new one into his head takes a while. The problem is Millipede stole the ‘I demand an enquiry’ line so we have had to re-teach Ed B the double dip one. Just in case he has to make a statement of any sort. God forbid.


      • 102
        P l e b says:

        Don’t worry. Yvette will be Chancellor.


  14. 15
    Frank says:

    It seems incredible that given his appalling incompetence & the damage he has done to future generations of british taxpayers – some yet unborn, that Ed Balls remains on the front bench of the oppsition.

    And how weak are the Conservatives if they cannot even attack Balls at every opportunity, given his track record, for fear of upsetting the reds in the Lib Dems?

    The 53% of economically inactive people in the UK that Labour turned into welfare junkies over 13 long years will vote to rob their own grandchildre to pay for their feckless lifestyle today. Balls did that – he is the architect.


    • 47
      Mitt Romney says:

      Raising that “inconvenient truth,” if you will, didn’t play in the US as an electoral strategy, and it sure won’t in the UK either, pardon my so-called 47% “gaffe.” It might be true, but it gets the fingers-in-ears-la-la-la treatment. Nobody wants to hear it. Too soon we’ll be old and too late we’ll be smart.


      • 84
        Hollande tax the rich and give to the unworthy says:

        I will not be making the same mistake.
        Many others yes, but not this one, I think!


    • 105
      Anonymous says:

      Long live vince the nince!


  15. 19
    Gordon Brown says:

    ‘No more Boom and bust’


  16. 20
    Mad Maggie Moran says:

    Is it time for my medication?


    • 36
      rot says:

      yes, gotta keep up the pretence for a little while longer.


    • 69
      A Doctor, offering his services to the afflicted says:

      I’m sure we could help you out of this condition in a day or so Madge. Book into my clinic for a course of twice-daily ECT. People never come back, so I justifiably claim my cure rate is 100%


    • 88
      Screwed Taxpayer says:

      Here’s your cyanide capsule dear.


  17. 22
    None says:



  18. 23
    Gonk III says:

    I used to think that Balls would probably be quite good in a really savage war.
    But I think he’s almost certainly a coward as well as a bully so that means he’s good for nothing. Maybe fertiliser, or ballast.


    • 53
      Anonymous says:

      ppl are more than one thingwingy.
      we can love one aspect and hate the other.
      doesn’t help that our emotional bias and wishfulthinking confuse.


  19. 26
    Yvette Cooper says:

    A double dip? If only……


  20. 28
    Ivor Biggun says:

    I’m Britain’s champion wanker
    Renowned throughout the land.
    Everybody knows my name
    But nobody wants to shake my hand.


  21. 30
    Penfold says:

    A really nasty piece of work, duplicitious as shit, and of course responsible for the economic misery that we are in, he was of course McMoron’s acolyte, and he should be a little more measured in his comments, given his culpability.

    But, as has been said in the past, who will remove this annoying little excrementous hoon from public life.


    • 70
      Harold Shipman says:

      Can’t wait to get my hands on him, just a little injection now Ed, it will stop all the pain of being a left wing nonce


  22. 31
    Thrasher Mitchell says:

    Today is National BumSmacking Day — Get smacking!


  23. 32
    Dave the Spendthrift says:

    Gideon and I are doing so well.

    Maintaining the Deficit at circa £12bn per month.

    We’ve just managed another £35bn Q.E. by the back door transfer from BoE to the Treasury,

    Aren’t we clever feckers!


  24. 41
    Bugler Bert says:

    Balls’ new gesture? in that photo it looks a bit limp-wristed – a la Bryant………


  25. 52
    Slow on the uptake says:

    Missed earlier comment on here so was much made of Sir Cyril Smith’s alleged indescretions? Still on BBC text but no mention on the news.


    • 56
      Simon Danczuk Labour MP(look over there it's a honky) says:

      Still working to take the heat of the Muslims in Rochdale.I’m sure you will hear more about Cyril soon.


  26. 55
    Harbottle says:

    Here’s Tony Blair demonstrating the new gesture:


  27. 62
    Useless fuckers says:

    Earthquake in Mexico. Nothing on the BBC website about it.


  28. 66
    Centre Parting says:

    Was Balls part of putting forward more immigration and people breeding more to alter the age profile so that we would be able to afford pensions for the ageing population?

    It’s working well….


  29. 92
    I don't nee d no doctor says:

    I now know why labour are still so bitter and twisted at being booted out of power in 2010. They wanted to finish off the UK once and for all, but failed.


    • 101
      1984 says:

      They wanted to finish off the UK once and for all, but failed.

      Don’t be so sure. The only way we’re managing to ‘only’ borrow 130bn quid a year is by printing an additional 100bn quid a year (on average since 2008).

      Nope. I think Labour has thoroughly fucked the UK. There is a very real risk that we’re finished already. If the only solution is quite literally printing money then I’d say we’re fucked.


  30. 115
    oliver cromwell says:

    I am just glad that Iam retired and will not see the wreck that this country is becomimg, camoren and his ilk have no respect for anyone, its a pity my namesake is not alive and well and able to bring these charlatens to book.


  31. 117
    Greychatter says:

    Didn’t know Ed was a “Limp wrist”


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