November 14th, 2012

“Sick Individual” Steals Liz Kendall’s Lunch


  1. 1
    Kebab Time says:

    Thieves in Parliament?

    Surely some mistake? ;)


  2. 2
    smoggie says:

    Time to call in the CIA, FBI and MFI.


  3. 3
    Percy says:

    No….. a judge led inquiry at least……


    • 36
      Frued says:

      Obviously, Liz doesn’t consider that there’s been a mis-understanding, or that the cleaner chucked it out. No – somebody is a thief! Typical leftie…


  4. 4
    Anonymous says:

    Who is Liz Kendall?


  5. 5
    dunstall says:

    Or an overarching review!!!


  6. 6
    roland says:

    The thief maybe needed something to feed his pet rat


  7. 7
    Senna says:

    Next time she should make a lasagne for lunch and put a hundred laxatives in it. That will put an end to that nonsense.


  8. 8
    Hank the Cat says:

    Yet another troughing labour MP

    Liz Kendall, Labour MP for Leicester West, saw her expenses rise by £40,021.

    She said £114,521 of the £154,232 was for three full-time and one part-time staff in Leicester. She said: “That’s where the bulk of the money goes, not on my personal costs.

    “Thousands of people want our help and we want to have the right staff to provide that.”


  9. 9
    Margaret Moron says:

    I did it but I wasn’t in control. I’m all krazy! Just ask my shrink! Woop woop!


  10. 10
  11. 11
    Anonymous says:

    Printed post-it notes!!


  12. 14
    dunstall says:

    George Entwistle says it might have been him but if it was nobody told him and he cannot remember


  13. 15
    Senna says:

    She pays for their lunches too. The last food bill was on par with saving the Ethiopians from mass starvation.


  14. 17
    Gordon Gecko says:

    Lunch is for wimps.


  15. 18
    Anon & fcuk the B B C says:

    Acting DG has just said Newsnight will be doing a hour long special

    on this heinous crime as its all Fat*chers doing & no one else !!

    Panorama will also be carrying out an indepth review as to the


    The Beeb Chairman Fatty Fang Pang & the (dis)Trust board fully support

    such investigative reporting !!!


  16. 19
    dunstall says:

    Where Mc Shame ?


    • 89
      Anonymous says:

      At the Fabian Society??


      • 129
        PC 51 says:

        Down the pub with Fabian of the Yard (fond memories for our older viewers)


        • 136
          Det Ch Sup Lockhart says:

          Ah yes.

          Happy days


          • Dixon of Dock Green says:

            Evenin’ All


          • dunstall says:

            Andy crawfotd says…Hello George


          • George Dixon's Son Inlaw says:

            yes & Coppers always got there man….who would always say

            “Its a fair cop,Guv , I’ll come quietly”

            He knew he would be going down for a stretch…..

            If he couldn’t the time he wouldn’t do the crime………

            But today….just look at our so called elected MP’s what

            a shining examples of lying, thieving, hypocrisy they demonstrate


            Most of them should be banged up for a very long time……without

            a reduction in the Prison term spent inside because they were MP’s

            OR being able to enjoy all of the House of Commons Perks once they

            are out of clink. Something they all do very frequently at present &

            of course the fcuking Mug Tax payers are footing the cost as usual….

            are there any current MP’s who actually pay TAX like the plebs are

            forced to do, or do MP’s all find ways of fiddling the TAX back ??


          • Dixon of Dock Green says:

            Bless you Andy.


          • DI Jack Carter says:

            Shut It!!


  17. 23
    Bill says:

    cheer up luv it was only your lunch. You been robbin the electorate for years.

    “Kendall grew up in Hertfordshire and attended Watford Grammar School for Girls. She then went up to Queens’ College, Cambridge graduating with a first in history in 1993. she has worked as Director of the Maternity Alliance charity, as a researcher for the King’s Fund, as an associate director for health, social care and children’s early years at the IPPR and has been a special adviser to two cabinet ministers, Patricia Hewitt and Harriet Harman.”

    another one who has been sucking from the public teat for years. never done a honest days work outside the public sector !!


  18. 24
    Ed Balls says:

    It was the baby eating government!


  19. 26
    Drop a Daisy cutter on ITV says:

    No PMQs today?


  20. 30
    Expense Claim says:

    1 ream yellow paper – £25
    10 Hrs creative services – £300
    Hire of meeting room to discuss fonts – £180
    Food & beverage for above meeting – £280
    1 x Contract quality proof – £80
    Printing services (minimum run 5,000) – £175
    2Hr Courier service – £95

    + VAT


  21. 31
    George Gideon Oliver Osborne says:

    I repeat for the hard of hearing.

    There is no Plan B and this is result.

    FTSE 100 5747.80
    -38.45 -0.66%


  22. 37

    What sort of ingenuous tosser would put ANYTHING in a communal fridge! How bloody naive is this shadow minister? (What was it anyway? Tofu, bean sprout & falafel salad with a mung bean and wheat grass smoothie from Fortnums? On ex’s, of course!)

    With this level of smarts on display, it’s no wonder they can’t get the big questions right, ffs.


    • 52
      Bill says:

      i want ot know what the lunch was and the cost of it. come on guido get the perpertration to post a pic online for us poor taxpapers to laught at.

      I myself had a can of chicken soup (85p) and 2 slices of bread. Total cost less than a pound. Also if you heat it at home you can put it into a vacuum flask and take it to work with you saving money !!!!

      So MPs you can eat cheaply.


    • 62
      Hank the Cat says:

      Someone stole my kitty litter


    • 125
      Queen of the jungle says:

      I get grumpy if I don’t get my early morning sausage.


  23. 42
    Gonk III says:

    Common ownership for the people


  24. 43
    Last Quango says:

    1. What type of saddo types a post it note?
    2. I think I left £500, a cartier watch and a mulberry bag in the fridge – where do I claim?


  25. 47
    "Bunter" Watson 218 says:

    Liz…look honestly I did not steal your Pork Pie however…

    Fatty Pang was munching something it was prolly him

    In any case it was horribly stale and tasted of stocking tops…err umm
    or so I would imagine..


  26. 51
    The Mysterious Oliver Letwin says:

    I can assure you it wasn’t me.
    I definitely did not dispose of Liz’s lunch in the park.
    Oh no.


  27. 53
    Last Quango says:

    Wish it finished

    Liz Kendall
    Room 101


  28. 55
    Jimmy says:

    So we’re looking for someone who likes food and hangs around MPs.

    Any ideas?


  29. 56
    lunchboxbeast says:

    Id have just spunked all over it and then watched her eat it

    Then again I am a very sick individual


  30. 58
    Ex graduate house dweller says:

    It happens, get over it.


  31. 60
    Tay King-dePisse says:

    All property is theft, Liz. It really isn’t your lunch so much as it’s that amount of food we allow you to have midday, barring a more-pressing need by someone else for it. That lunch may have made the difference between some poor staffer living or dying (some anorexic little bird with dysmorphia issues), and at a minimum may have been needed by a diabetic to regulate his/her blood sugar– or are you too heartless, too Tory, to understand?
    Now be quiet, and we’ll say no more about it, there’s a good lass.


    • 68
      Hank the Cat says:

      Talking about dysmorphia issues wonder if, Abbot,harman.ladyboy cooper and the eagle sisters suffer from that


      • 134
        Det Sgt 51 (Been promoted!) says:

        No, dey don’t suffer from dysmorphia; dey suffer from datmorphia (for which there is no known cure)


  32. 63
    dunstall says:

    Rachel Reeves says ..although Im two sandwiches short of a picnic it wasnt me


  33. 64
    Jumbo says:

    Who is she?


  34. 72
    Not a BBC spokesperson says:

    There’ll be a special on tonight – we’ve been tweeting about this all day and whilst we cannot name names (identification is impossible as we can’t afford colour printing owing to the vicious cuts from this Tory led coallition), we will be telling everybody that it was a Tory wot dun it.
    We have absolutely no evidence to support this and it is completely untrue but given the unique way that we are funded, it didn’t stop us last time and it won’t stop us tonight.
    Thank you for your money – even those that are lower than vermin.


  35. 74
    Dysgwr_Cymraeg says:

    She should put a note on it saying:
    ” I have spit in these sandwiches” Ha!
    Then when she returns she’ll find another note saying:
    “so have I!”


  36. 76
    Silly Sally B13 COW says:


  37. 84
    Lard Pressclott - Laughing Policeman in waiting says:

    ‘Sick individual’…..


  38. 94
    Hoist Them By Their Own Petard says:

    It’s called wealth redistribution Liz, you are discriminating against someone less fortunate with less opportunities for lunch.


  39. 99
    dunstall says:

    Was the sandwich Halal or Kosher ?narrows the field


  40. 106
    IMHO says:

    Funny, I was under the impression that 648 clowns had stolen MY lunch, they took it and they will do it AGAIN!.


  41. 114
    Fog says:

    Episode of ‘Friends’ – Ross having a breakdown because someone stole his sandwich.


  42. 117
    8illy 8owden, the world's greatist umplre says:

    Comma missing after the first ‘Very’ (possibly after the second ‘Very’ too; can someone comment on this?).



  43. 118
    Looking forward says:

    So she actually went back to the fridge. Did she think it might be returned or what?


  44. 123
    JH3 says:

    The lunth wath not thtolen.

    It wath pwedithtwibuted.


  45. 151
    IPSA says:

    We’ve ordered an individual fridge for each MP, with a lock, and a laser display screen on the front


  46. 153
    Baron Hogwash says:

    Hand writing expert needed – Fatson on the loose.


  47. 154
    Bunter Twatson says:

    Bit more salt next time please Liz.



  48. 155
    keredybretsa says:

    Pooh in a sandwich+pee in a drink and someone gets nasty sick. Usually puts a stop to such tricks!


  49. 159
  50. 161
    Liz Kendal's Number One Fan says:

    I just confessed to it on Wikipedia but their bet said I was vandalising the site. How petty. Surely that’s better than vandalzing their fridge?

    I’d eat more than her lunch though. Hairy pie anyone with a pinch of fishy aroma?


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