Parliament Invites Lords to “Speed Date” Teenagers
Spectacularly badly timed:
Dear Lord ███████
Political Speed Dating Event – Thursday 22nd November
As part of Parliament Week 2012 we are holding a ‘Political Speed Dating’ event where a group of 13-16 year olds will have the rare opportunity to chat in small groups with current Parliamentarians.
The session will run at 10.30am to 11.45am in the Macmillan Room in Portcullis House, and it would be wonderful for the students if you were available to participate. We are inviting Members of both Houses from all parties and the event will involve up to 10 Members. We have extended the invitation to several members and I hope that you are able to participate.
Please contact me if I can provide any further information about the session, I hope to hear from you soon.
Yours sincerely,
Dawn Hatch
Education Visits Officer
Education Service
Houses of Parliament
Well that was pretty poorly worded given the current climate.
John McAfee, the man behind the anti-virus company, is wanted for killing a US citizen, police say
He should be locked up, for developing shit software.
Police in Belize want to question US anti-computer virus software pioneer John McAfee in connection with the murder of a neighbour he had been quarrelling with, but they say he remains a person of interest at this time and is not a suspect.
McAfee, who invented the anti-virus software that bears his name, has homes and businesses in Belize, and is believed to have settled in the country some time around 2010.
Avast….why use anything else.
..and a smug bar steward to boot!
What is anti virus software?
What is a virus?
Don’t ask me
Come on, Portsmouth !
Is ‘speed dating’ any relation to ‘court date for speeding’?
chuckle
13-16 year olds? I’ll be first in line.
Boaz.
Won’t they be a bit old for your sick tastes?
Come on, Portsmouth !
boy oh boy!
Get in there Portsmouth
Down the Hatch!
Better than
Up the Sn@tch
One up the bum,
No harm done!
I feel an Early Day Motion coming on…
Abu: I’m home. Mrs Q: The hall still needs painting. Abu:*stares at camera*
..sounds like a part of shooting script for series 3 of The Office!
This is pretty poor gutter writing considering it’s quite clear it’s not malicous
Yes, you’re right, I could have phrased it better.
They’re trying to groom impressionable young people and get them hooked on ‘politics’ (or ‘Filth’ as it’s known on the street) so that they can exploit them ruthlessly. Boys and girls, you may think that Filth makes you look grown-up and that you can handle it, but before you know it you’ll be slaving as an unpaid intern for some evil Mr/s Big(ish) or trawling the gutters of Westminster in search of a publicity ‘fix’. Just say no!
Plod’s Filth round here me ol’ mate.
Maybe it was dictated by Tom Watson; he seems to be very good at gutter writing. Mind you, nobody can check that assertion now, since he’s deleted most of his blog.
Let’s hope these perverts all have their CRB checks up-to-date.
I hope they all paid for their CRB checks.
Omnishambles chosen as new word of the year by Oxford.
What did Cambridge choose? Nonce
I’m completely doolally too you know. Aren’t you talking to me any more?
Thanks, Schnorbitz. Now, anything to say about the BBC smearing your political opponents?
Shut up you immigrant loving t*osser. Once you can stand up for and protect our own coutnry’s heritage then you can have the moral stand to wish others the best for their holy days.
*country
Britain cannot really be called Milibands country.
This will be self love then
It simply beggars belief that some immigrants vote Tory – after all we have done for them.
We vote respect these days Ed.
But Kudos for your party letting us in
Fuck off you c’unt.
It’s the Festival of Lightweights.
Are you sure you’re feeling all right, Ed? You mentioned the country that dare not speak its name.
Well spotted
You couldn’t make it up
I could.
Will there be Werthers…?
We have ways of making you enjoy our German confectionary. Want to find out?
Come not between the Nazgul and his prey
I’ll come any way you fancy Big Boy
I would like to wish all those celebrating Diwali today a very happy and peaceful Diwali!
Die…now.
Sent from my iphone (Mordor)
No matter how hard the Home Office try to deport the radical hate-preacher Abu Qatada, he just keeps coming back. Apparently, they had even more trouble with his brother, Abu Meringue.
Ba-dumm….
..tish…
Proper speed dating is great. Not with teenagers though, I hasten to add. Much better than online dating, which is only for weirdo’s.
Speedily buggering tight holes, that sounds like jolly good fun old boy.
The fact that MPs can take time off work between 10.30 and 11.45 am to get down with the kids tells you quite a lot.
Sorry, paid retired MPs.
But they are over the age of consent, no?
I voted to lower it so as to grope some more kiddies…
Is that you Handycock?
The can Cum Dancing with me me when they are finished with the MPs…
http://fr.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fichier:Cicciolina.jpg
Great honey trap. Question is: who set it up? MI5, CIA, Mossad or FSB? We can safely rule out Number 10.
I set it up…
But at least I have resigned for shagging my biographer
What else was she there for anyway?
I can show them my early day motion…
Mr Oaten has departed unforunately!
Couldn’t have managed it anyway, I’m completely full of shit
I’m worried that Lord Mandelson will put his hand up.
One prefers the fist
Educashion Visits Ocifer
Says it all really
After 13 years of Labour buggery, thuggery and skulduggery
And two years of LibCon Omnishambles
This is the dregs we are left with
And these fuckwits are all paid by us…
The next governor of the Bank of England will be Guido Fawkes, the right wing political blogger, , if the chancellor and prime minister choose the candidate favoured by some senior regulators, government advisers, central bankers and bankers.
And micro Gouido will be sent to 10 Downing Street as punishment
To let us blog freely….
We must engage with these kids
and the environment
We must no loger have a footprint
http://www.churchofengland.org/media-centre/news-extras/yearreview/dec06/gogreenchurchesurged.aspx
So the jokes now will start with
“As the Bishopess said to the Actor”….
Shame really…
In the RC Church, it usually IS, “Said the Bishop to the actor,” if the truth were known.
“we can’t survive without insects”
She’s talking about the House of Commons.
I think Dawn Hatch should be sent to join our Nads as penance
for her fuckwittery
These overpaid functionnaries should justify their salaries to the People…
She would then be called Down the Hatch…
Hello little boy, have you ever seen an MP naked?
Jim fixed it for me.
To host such a shenanigan and boast about it, at a time like this, with such a poorly worded statement just goes to show how, clueless, out of touch and insulated from the world they like to think they own, these cretins actually are.
They are totally divorced from reality and have absolutely no conception or understanding on how they appear…
No sign of intelligent life there at all.
That is not just dumb that is incompetence, ignorance and arrogance, they must be so proud!
Dawn’ll fix it for you. And you. And you.
Their old pimps and procurers are on the run from the law… never mind let’s get back to business and cut out the middle man, chaps.
Comments (69)
Dawn the Hatch!
Cheers!
I’ve met 100s of interesting people
if parker pens had been called something else you wouldn’t have got the gig.
It is interesting that so many people in power, are so far removed from reality.
Lord Greville Janner got in trouble for dating that 14 year old boy so I don’t think it’s a good idea.
(It all got hushed up though).
cool people smoke fags
Pool party?
“Well that was pretty poorly worded given the current climate.”
Maybe, but on the other hand there’s an awful lot of hysteria.
I don’t doubt that some youngsters were seriously abused. I also don’t doubt that the usual low-lifes are trying to cash in.
In the mid/late sixties when I was 17 and travelling twice a day on packed standing-room-only rush-hour London tube trains, I assumed that being groped was thrown in with the ticket price. In such cattle-truck condidtions it was often hard to identify the perpetrator but when I could, oh boy did I enjoy stepping back heavily with a stiletto-clad foot and hearing the ensuing howl of anguish!
Sometimes I feel positively deprived that it didn’t leave me with any traumas or hangups, and absolutely didn’t spoil my life. Maybe I should sue someone for not spoiling my life enough?
Oh dear, just to clarify…
I know perfectly well that most men are pillars of rectitude (sort of
) and they are all lovely. It is only a very sad minority that go groping.
Bugger me and pass a butt wipe.