November 12th, 2012

BBC Director General Runners and Riders

Given that George Entwistle effectively pocketed almost £8,500 for each of his 53 days as Director General, there will be no shortage of candidates for the job. Guido gives you his own take on the runners and riders:

  • Craig Oliver – The former BBC man turned embattled Downing Street comms chief is under pressure in his current job after a seemingly endless series of media foul-ups from the PM. Last week’s This Morning debacle will hardly have helped. This solution will work well for all concerned.
  • Andrew Neil – Experience running Sky as their founding boss. One of the Beeb’s finest  inquisitors, Brillo would surely get to the bottom of all that has been going on. Would need to remain on screen though.
  • Andrew Marr – Handy Andy is a BBC stalwart and earned praise for his grilling of Lord Patten over the weekend. Is expected to rule himself out over alleged indiscretions in a Soho bar.
  • David Dimbleby – A legend at Broadcasting House, Dimbers has graced our screens for decades. Making the step up would mean hanging up his Question Time boots. He certainly made the case for himself on Today this morning.
  • Kelvin MacKenzie – It could be argued that more 90s-style tabloid hackery is just what the BBC needs. There would be none better for the job than Kelvin. Understands popular journalism.
  • Piers Morgan – The CNN host might soon be out of job if his US election coverage was anything to go by. Certainly has the experience in the media, though a future court date is the last thing the BBC needs. 
  • James Murdoch – An outside bet but one that would certainly stir things up. Has a proven track record of successfully running major media corporations and dealing with scandal. They could hardly do worse…

Let battle commence.


285 Comments

  1. 1

    None of them women, or, indeed, PD James…

  2. 2
    Kebab Time says:

    Has to be Gordon Brown!

  3. 3
    WastedJoker says:

    John Humphrys?

  4. 4
    Anonymous says:

    How about the Murdoch thaT

  5. 5
    Choo Choo Portaloo says:

    That little tinker @afneil surely has to be a shoo-in. Dimbers is a no-no; very unprofessional how he overruns QT every week, taking Neil’s This Week airtime away from him.

  6. 6
    Anonymous says:

    How about the Murdoch that actually likes the BBC, Elizabeth?

  7. 7
    Kebab Time says:

    Doubt it pays enough for a Murdock

  8. 8
    dunstall says:

    Polly Toynbee then it will be F…..D!!!!!!!!!!

  9. 9
    robbie says:

    Try and be serious for once.

  10. 10
    Gordon Brown says:

    i’m free!

  11. 11
    concrete pump says:

    It’s got to go to the Scots scouring pad……

  12. 12
    Old Tory Bigot says:

    I feel pretty sure it will be none of the above.

  13. 13
    V1le Labour ruined my Country says:

    Let’s hope your always free, mind you you could finish off the BBC so maybe you are the right candidate?

  14. 14
    Old Tory Bigot says:

    He wouldn’t turn up. That would be a win win situation.

  15. 15
    Ex Ex Ex Ah! Monika says:

    Patten says that THE interview was equivalent to evidence being obtained under torture.

  16. 16
    Roscoe Rules says:

    As the BBC appears to have gained special protected status,maybe they can announce the selection of a new director general by means of coloured chimney smoke.

  17. 17
    None of the above says:

    Abu Qatada. That way they can just continue there anti 1sreal leaning no problem

  18. 18
    Penfold says:

    They can all F.O.
    The BeeB needs an outside candidate, who will sweep the Augean Stable that is the BBC, removing deadbeats, bias and management layers, whilst making people accountable, which will be a novelty for the employees.

    As for Piers, he’s going down for phone hacking…..

  19. 19
    genghiz the kahn says:

    Andrew has marred his chances through liberal use of super injunctions about a mistress we are not allowed to name or mention.

    He would be a shoe in as DG if Brown was in charge.

  20. 20
    None of the above says:

    I would not touch with a bargepole thank you

  21. 21
    muggins says:

    It has to be Andrew Neil, the only objective one amongst those.

  22. 22
    Operation Crossbow says:

    Tony Blair, the BBC needs someone who can stop the traffic. I see the stand in DJ got a strop on with Sky News and stormed off. Got the video yet Guido?

  23. 23
    Steve32 says:

    I don’t get much of a salary, but I would willingly have it reduced by two thirds, if Kelvin MacKenzie were to be made DG of The BBC! It would be the best thing that happened to anyone or anything ever!!

  24. 24
    Vulturous scum at Edinburgh University profiting from a corpse says:

    None of them. Germaine Greer would make an excellent DG.

  25. 25
    Safe Pair of hands says:

    Eddie Mair is my choice.

  26. 26
    This Week says:

    BRILLO!!!!!

  27. 27
    None of the above says:

    And probably accidentally burn the whole place down. Result!

  28. 28
    Call me Dave says:

    I nominate Tom Watson

  29. 29
    Keep up at the back says:

    See the previous thread.

  30. 30
    BBC,Guardian,Labour party revolving door job club says:

    The candidate’s for new BBC director general we have….in the left corner Andrew Marr,In the left corner David Dimbleby,in the left corner…..

  31. 31
    BBC is pants says:

    No women as usual.

  32. 32
    Quaesitum ad fontem solos deducere verpos says:

    Joe Pasquale

  33. 33
    BBC,Guardian,Labour party revolving door job club says:

    Or Blacks.tut tut tut BBC

  34. 34
    Some Twat up North says:

    Abu Qatada is my choice, no chance of bias then.

  35. 35
    Adam n Eve's uncle says:

    George Blake?

  36. 36
    anon. says:

    With ending. ;-)

  37. 37
    Chris Patten says:

    We need someone who is Pro EU, an advocate of catastrophic man made global warming and a lefty to the very core. Polly Toynbee opportunity knocks.

  38. 38
    Basil Brown and Victor Meldrew for DG says:

    The explosive Basil Brush and Victor Meldrew can job share. The only time you will ever here the very cautious line ‘I don’t bloody well belieeeeef it.’ Boom-Boom.

  39. 39
    Well it's a thought says:

    Can’t we just just go into any the courts of law and pick one of the people who has been called up for jury service and hasn’t been picked, at least you have a greater chance of them actually doing it better than the ones above, every one on the above list non, no ,you must be joking, time the tv tax payer had an honest person in charge of public broadcasting again.

  40. 40
    Hank the Cat says:

    Why not have a job share? with all the candiidates appearing to do a milliband,
    stabbing each other in the back, they must have at least one grey cell between them.

  41. 41
    Real Equality says:

    I am an equalitist. I have equal hatred for all of them.

  42. 42
    None of the above says:

    Or Jo Brand

  43. 43
    Operation Crossbow says:

    Cheers only linked to this thread

  44. 44
    Hank the Cat says:

    Is the Augean stable the same as my kitty litter?

  45. 45
    Mehdi Hasan says:

    I nominate Mehdi Hasan

  46. 46
    Operation Crossbow says:

    Why no

    Polly Toynbee
    Harriet Harperson
    Hazel Blears
    Diane Abbott
    Margaret Hodge

  47. 47
    Anonymous says:

    Nadine may not have her old job to come back to…

  48. 48
    Bilderberger says:

    Bilderbergers: Cleared To Rule The World

    Posted on November 10, 2012 by Tony Dean

    An article just in about the Bilderbergers
    by Richard Cottrell
    Contributing writer for ‘End the Lie

    “Bilderberg leaves rehab, cleared to rule the world”

    One of the world’s most secretive societies is emerging from the closet, blinking and shrinking at the harsh light of day, like Dracula suddenly deciding it might be safe after all to emerge from his cool dank vault at sunrise.
    Sunrise is the right word. Never have the prospects for one world order seemed rosier or closer at hand. So it can be no coincidence at all that the Bilderberg Group, and its sister cabal, the Trilateral Commission, are suddenly basking in deckchairs on the lawns of public respectability.

    It is my sincere conviction that we are watching the warm-up acts to prepare us all for a single world order as the orchestrated take down of the entire global economy begins to bite.

    Shortly after the Bilderberg/Goldman Sachs/EU promoted coup d’états in Italy and Greece in November, Reuters wired a report that Bilderberg and the Trilateral Commission had taken over Europe. The agency made it seem the terrible twins should be applauded for picking up the poisoned chalice of the great debt crisis purportedly eating away at the Euro.

    Before we go any further, it stands on the public record that Reuters CEO Peter Job is no stranger to breaking bread among the rulers of the universe.

    Read the full article here

    [Editor’s note: in fact, it is so public that a PDF hosted on the Department of Defense’s official website reveals exactly that on page 7 under the heading “UNITED KINGDOM” where he is the first listing.]

    Edit:
    The server for that pdf gives an “Internal Server Error”, so obviously the Bilderbergers in our parliament don’t want you to see it. No bother just download this pdf instead secret-societies-the-bilderbergers.pdf

    http://tinyurl.com/bpc8or2

    Further reading:-
    bilderbergers-want-uk-in-eurozone
    eu-population-control-agenda

  49. 49

    Ian Brady is a safe pair of hands.

  50. 50
    Tim Davie says:

    Must go,I’ve have a lot of shit to get back in a horse

  51. 51
    concrete pump says:

    Are any of them homnasts…?

  52. 52
    Operation Crossbow says:

    Why not just leave it blank and pencil in whoever is in charge of the Labour party at the time?

  53. 53
    Rob Wilson, M.P. Cunt. says:

    Can I just express my disappointment that you have not put me in the running?

    After all my attention-seeking letter-writing last week, I should be an odds-on favourite.

    Having said that, I confess that the truth is I am a command-class Hunt and the only reason I am doing this is to gain some penpals.

    I am placing this message in the public domain.

  54. 54
    My evil genius plan to destroy the BBC from within says:

    Sally Bercow for DG. Lets finish the BBC off forever.

  55. 55
    DG Factor says:

    A reality TV show with public phone voting for the next DG is the way to go.

  56. 56
    Fandabidozy says:

    The Krankies.

  57. 57
    None of the above says:

    Anyone still looking into Savile issues and the cover up there? Or has this ‘news’ done its work?

  58. 58
    Mark oatens glass coffee table says:

    1) Ken Clarke
    2) Mathew Corbbit
    3) Russ Abbot
    4) Ted Heath
    5) Mat Baker

  59. 59
    @Sally Bercow says:

    Until another Tory scalp presents itself we must focus on those poor abused kids.

  60. 60
    Sue d'Nymme says:

    What not Paxo? His first morning’s work could be to sack himself.

  61. 61

    Can I nominate Tony Blair? Despite luring the British in to a war on the orders of US, Tony Blair, although a dangerous man – is after all a genius of a man (but for all the wrong reasons)

  62. 62
    Plato says:

    5 years ago, maybe. When he was sharp. Is too pompous now.

  63. 63
    Ed's Twitter Intern says:

  64. 64
    Ex Ex Ex Ah! Monika says:

    You are Slotgob and you can keep the £5.

  65. 65
    Mark oatens glass coffee table says:

    ROBBIE SAVAG

  66. 66
    Ex Ex Ex Ah! Monika says:

    Bleedin and Obvious come to mind.

  67. 67
    Well I would say this wouldn't I says:

  68. 68

    I can’t find anyone giving odds on Brillo – anyone know a bookie who is?

  69. 69
    Plato says:

    She certainly needs the money to settle her upcoming libel case.

  70. 70
    Rupert my Hero says:

    Bring back Hilda..

  71. 71
    Tim Davie says:

    I can’t see my name there either. Is there no justice?

  72. 72
    Testing Testing says:

    This pair should be given the job of DG. Certainly could not do any worse than Enwistle.

  73. 73
    Jeremy 'TaxPlan' Paxman says:

    I am a biddable time-server too, albeit it on a magnificent pay package.

  74. 74
    No sh*t, Sherlock says:

    They pay you money.

  75. 75
    Climate Denier says:

    Andrew Neil would not be allowed as he has made it clear that he is not convinced that climate change is going to bring about the collapse of civilisation by three weeks come next Tuesday fortnight.

    Such views are VERBOTEN at the BBC.

    http://bishophill.squarespace.com/blog/2012/11/11/booker-on-newbery.html

    ‘For you, Sceptic, ze var iss over and you are all going to fry’

  76. 76
    The only one of sense in politics says:

  77. 77
  78. 78
    Anonymous says:

    Derek Laud ticks all the boxes.

  79. 79
    Latimer Alder says:

    My candidates here

  80. 80
    Labourunionsbbc we are one says:

    To all those complaining about no women on the list, the solution is to make it a labour-style all woman short list.

    Then everyone is satisfied when mr x gets the job.

  81. 81
    Ken Livingstone says:

    You forgot…… Ken Livingstone.

    Has all the correct left wing credentials, has run one of the biggest cities in the world. Huge experience. An outsider. Has media experience via his LBC radio show. Very popular.

  82. 82
    Tim Davie says:

    Just ‘ad a pint of winkles, and a pie with jellied eels daan the Old Kent Road, me old cock sparrers. Rarin’ to go, just polishin’ the buttons on me Pearly King outfit.

  83. 83
    Adam n Eve's uncle says:

    A CV if ever I saw one.

  84. 84
    Labourunionsbbc we are one says:

    Andrew, Andrew, I have nothing more to say.

  85. 85
    Anonymous says:

    Winner! Always had the backing of the staff of the BBC. Good with fiction productions. Has all the telephone numbers of the right people on his mobile when he can find it. Will throw his weight around when it is needed and even when it is not. Has a way with bigoted people.

  86. 86
    Old Blue Eyes says:

    Or Chris Huhne

  87. 87
    Mrs Jack Dromey says:

    I would like to put my name forward for this all wimmin shortlist

  88. 88
    Hank the Cat says:

    How about a date?

  89. 89
    Quick Draw McGraw says:

    Michael Portaloo

  90. 90
    Mornington Crescent says:

    Yep, got that, Schnorbitz, ta. More words of insight and wisdom from the ‘leader’ of the Larbour Parteh.

  91. 91
    Testing Testing says:

    No Shemales! tsk. Is it too much to ask.

  92. 92
    Engineer says:

    Andy Coulson is free at the moment. Mind you, he might not be after the court case…

  93. 93
    Great British Public says:

    ‘Very popular’ BWAHAHAHAHAHHAAAAHHHHHAAAAA !!!!!!!!!

  94. 94
    An orange faced South Africanone says:

    Nor Mine.

  95. 95
    Latimer Alder says:

    Mr Abu Hamza’s friends assure me that he is a safe pair of hands.

  96. 96
    Selohesra says:

    Yeah – how about a blonde bird with big boobs. Couldn’t be any worse than previous guy but we could enjoy looking at her

  97. 97
    Rupert my Hero says:

    One missing, Guido

  98. 98
    Mornington Crescent says:

    I nominate… our host.

    Well, why not?

  99. 99
    Ex Ex Ex Ah! Monika says:

    Err ‘short’ or ‘fat’ list??

  100. 100
    Red Ken Lyingscum says:

  101. 101
    Hank the Cat says:

    Brillo can lick my balls

  102. 102
    Anon says:

    Someone that should be included in the list as a possible for Beeb’s New

    DG is “Jane Lighting” the former head of Channel 5

    plus she has good press & commercial business experience…….

    Jane Lighting will certainly bring a fresh look & much needed drastic over

    haul for this out of touch very bloated dinosaur that needs to be dragged

    kicking & shouting into the 21st Century and being cut down to size thats

    fit for purpose

    Cometh the time & in this case cometh the lady !!!

    I sincerely trust she is on the short list……..

  103. 103
    Engineer says:

    Nadine Dorries? She’ll be used to working with creepy-crawlies now, and she ticks the ‘female’ box.

  104. 104
    Jack Dromey says:

    I wouldn’t be where I am today if it wasn’t for all women shortlists.

  105. 105
    Ex Ex Ex Ah! Monika says:

    “one of the finest broadcasters ”

    And for the record….name the others.

  106. 106
    Some Twat up North says:

    This country is bollocksed.

  107. 107
    Tom Watson says:

    What about me Guido, just remember what will happen if I’m not included.

  108. 108
    BodMot says:

    They want someone with far-left pro-nanny state propaganda experience?

    Can they reincarnate Goebbels?

  109. 109
    Ryker says:

    Why u so down on the BBC? If it’s so bad how come everyone knows it?

    The BBC is respected worldwide. You aren’t

    BBC 1 You 0

    Checkmate

  110. 110
    Latimer Alder says:

    Memo to Fat Pang:

    Re George’s successor

    Thank you for your suggestions. But on reflection we feel obliged to reject both of them

    Sadly, Bill and Ben are gravely tainted by their association with ‘Little Weed’ and would not be suitable.

    Muffin the Mule could not be coaxed from retirement, and his name has unfortunate connotations in today’s febrile Savilian environment. The last thing we need is further police investigations…..

    But it occurs to us that Sooty and Sweep don’t seem to have many engagements planned right now. Perhaps they could be approached?

    Yours Faithfully

    Open The Box And Take The Money and Run (Talent Scouts)

  111. 111
    Mornington Crescent says:

    Holly Willoughby?

  112. 112
    BodMot says:

    No BBC = 4 billion tax cut.

  113. 113
    BodMot says:

    Need someone with commercial experience to guide it on the road to subscription funding.

  114. 114
    Engineer says:

    John Presclott?

  115. 115
    Chris Huhne says:

    I’m free (for the moment).

  116. 116
    This Fat'un says:

    I decided to shower Entwistle with wads of cash because it was only money from the licence fee and therefore “appropriate”.

  117. 117
    Ed's Twitter Intern says:

  118. 118
    Blakey says:

    Get her working on the buses. Pathetic cow.

  119. 119
    Tom Watson says:

    Take the following and see where it leads.

    Someone from the Police Federation
    Someone from Whitehall
    Tom Watson
    Someone from Newsnight
    Someone from ITV
    Puppet Philip Schofield

    See the trend, over to you Guido, let’s see how smart you are!

  120. 120
    Dennis McShane says:

    I’m also free (for the moment).

    And I’ve nicked Chris Huhne’s missus. Among other things

  121. 121
    BodMot says:

    Could get a yank. Algor is free.

  122. 122
    concrete pump says:

    Clare Balding…she really does tick female boxes.

  123. 123
    Cynical-old-bag says:

    No shit, Ed.

    I thought for a minute that you were going to put yourself forward for the job.

    At least you’ll be in charge of something, eh.

  124. 124
    The Chuckle Brothers says:

    Us

  125. 125
    concrete pump says:

    And he’s super-duper serial…

  126. 126
    Gawd Help Us says:

    Unfortunately never seems to turn up for work.

  127. 127
    Engineer says:

    How many innocent people has Guido accused of kiddy-fiddling?

  128. 128
    Roscoe Rules says:

    Child abuse,cover up,deflection and smears,all supported by a dogmatic bunch of loyal followers who believe the institution has a god given right to exist.
    This isn’t a new director general we are getting but a fucking pope.

  129. 129
    None of the above says:

    Don’t companies have to advertise vacancies in a manner that is none discriminatory?

    Well I cannot find the DG job listed – https://careers.bbc.co.uk/fe/tpl_bbc01.asp?newms=se

  130. 130
    dunstall says:

    What it needs is a hard nosed private sector exec good at wielding the axe and cost cutting to bring a sense of day to day realsim to an organisation so wrapped up in itself that it has completely lost touch with the real world.

  131. 131
    blub says:

    Is it just me or does Tim Davie have a bit of a John Inman walk. It’s very distracting.

  132. 132
    Crazy says:

    If I can’t have the bird with the big knockers Germaine Greer then Portillo is my second choice.

  133. 133
    BodMot says:

    Go back to CiF and dribble there. I hear they’ve started warming the windows on your bus.

  134. 134
    Ahead of the curve says:

    Tim Davie, quicker out of the blocks than Usain Bolt.

  135. 135
    Boris is the Man says:

    He’s working hard on his Ken Livingstone soundalike accent.

    Aaaaaargghhh

    Boris for DG

  136. 136
    dunstall says:

    What about the Woodentops? Er no we have already got too many of them.

  137. 137
    Anonymous says:

    Isn’t that the woman who sat beside Schofield as he brandished the list of alleged abusers in front of Cameron last week?

  138. 138
    Ahead of the curve says:

    Abbott, your view, your view, since when does your view matter. Racist.

  139. 139
    BodMot says:

    Newsnight special on ManBearpig?

  140. 140
    Challenging says:

    Anneka

  141. 141
    Dudley Zoo says:

    I am just glad the BBC don’t make cars or aircraft

  142. 142
    Bluto says:

    Diane, Diane, you missed a bit:-

    “My view is that despite the current problems and the current media coverage, the BBC remains one of the finest Labour party propaganda broadcasters in the world.”

  143. 143
    Latimer Alder says:

    +1 to that.

  144. 144
  145. 145
    Bluebottle says:

    Are you taking the piss ?

  146. 146
    Keep it real says:

    Stalin. Well so fucking left wing its verging on communism.

  147. 147
    Ryker says:

    Why u not work for the BBC?

    YOu are not intelligent enough. I expect you are frustrated middle management in dead end conmpany.

    BBC 1 You 0

  148. 148
    BodMot says:

    With his experience in creating pack of lie mockumentaries, I think Michael Moore should get an interview.

  149. 149

    If thats the case why do they force people to pay for it under threat of imprisonment.

    Suely if its as good as you claim it is then BBC would have no problem raising money if the licence fee was made voluntary.

  150. 150
    Plato says:

    Doesn’t *he* have a view on what his wife does?

  151. 151
    BournemouthDP says:

    that is exactly what i was going to say, there must be at least one woman capable of doing the DG’s job

  152. 152
    Bluto says:

    But they are truly excellent at crafting lies.

  153. 153
    Sineless Prick in Number 10 says:

    I feel that my handling of the present BBC crisis has been exemplary. I worked out my strategy when I was chillaxing.

  154. 154
    Ahead of the curve says:

    Maybe Ed Millionaireband should learn a lesson from the honourable Entwhistle, after all George never stabbed his brother in the back.

  155. 155
    Joss Taskin says:

    So, the British Taxpayers will be picking up the bill for George Wetwhistle’s payment for failure AND, if a certain ‘Tory Peer from the Thatcher era’ sues the BBC, the British Taxpayers pick up the bill for that too ??

  156. 156
    Sensible Person says:

    +10

  157. 157
    Ahead of the curve says:

    David Dimbleby, just how far left do you want the BBC to go.

  158. 158
    La' says:

    What about Sven?

  159. 159
    blub says:

    The news and entertainment sides need to be split in two.

    The news half should be run by someone like Andrew Neil.

    The entertainment side should be run by someone who respects BBC tradition and so is at least nonce-neutral although ideally either an actual nonce, semi-nonce or pro-nonce. I can see four potential candidates up there who look like they might fit those criteria.

  160. 160
    Hugh Janus says:

    Yes, and loves trivia and silly, tedious stunts. He assumes we can’t cope with serious discussion, hence this serious shortcoming. Was once quite a talent, but no longer now that he wants to play everything for laughs.

  161. 161
    Latimer Alder says:

    No wonder you can’t find it. It’ll be in the Gardniua, and nobody at all reads that.

  162. 162
    another dickhead says:

    ..and whose words told to me in confidence I’ll now share with the world via twatter

  163. 163
    lol says:

    Scrap the licence fee first and the BBC can do what the fuck they like.

  164. 164
    George Gideon Oliver Osborne says:

    Louise.

  165. 165
    The savant5 says:

    Has fat pang fallen on his paunch yet.

    Or is that a biological non sequitur. As well. As a physical impossibility ???

  166. 166
    Mornington Crescent says:

    That would be the office located somewhere in the building pictured on your Twatter would it?

  167. 167
    Joss Taskin says:

    How do you know journos are calling him if his staff are so busy ??

  168. 168
    Ahead of the curve says:

    Sally Bercow has no grasp whatever of what she has done. Twitter world is not pretend Sally, it’s a place where you have to take responsibility for what you write.
    I’m afraid you are a bit thick girl.

  169. 169
    JH3 says:

    You are aware you are a parody of yourself, right?

    It’s bad enough working out which posts are the ‘real’ Jimmy and which are wags taking the piss.

    The levels of dementedness in each really are fine shades of grey.

  170. 170
    Jack and Stan says:

    We’d turf her off our bus

  171. 171
    Hugh Janus says:

    All “hideously white” in the words of a previous incumbent.

  172. 172
    The savant5 says:

    Do you realise his initials spell

    GGOO

    I do not know if thhst is Freudian. For GO

    Or a description of the particular mire in which he finds’ himself

  173. 173
    Roscoe Rules says:

    Ryker,you read like the sort of c*nt who doesn’t have to pay the BBC licence fee.
    Still at home?

  174. 174
  175. 175
    Eskimo says:

    Can I have it back please, I want to finish my igloo while there’s still some ice left.

  176. 176
    eh eh?? says:

    All the way to the gulags.

  177. 177
    How to throw your Twitter followers under a bus says:

    http://twitter.com/SallyBercow/status/267930892461285376

  178. 178
    Hugh Janus says:

    The ‘Trojan Horseface’ ploy – I like your thinking…..

  179. 179
    Anonymous says:

    Sean Gabb

  180. 180
    Ryker says:

    YOu are clearly jealous of the worldwide BBC good reputation.

    This is what the BBC are good at

    your private TV cannot do that

    CheckmateMuthafucka

  181. 181
    Some Mothers Do Have Them says:

    Frank Spencer is the ideal man.

    With Frank Pike as his deputy, and Sir Les Patterson as Media Adviser

  182. 182
    Engineer says:

    Half term’s over. Should be at school….

  183. 183
    Anonymous says:

    Her living accommodation and expenses are funded by the taxpayer and as such I think we have a right to know why she smeared an innocent man,making her husband’s position untenable.
    Was she in this taxpayer-funded property using taxpayer-funded equipment when she libelled Lord McAlpine?

  184. 184
    blub says:

    Women often take revenge on two-timing ex-lovers by sleeping with the grossest, most physically disgusting man they can find. Dunno why.

  185. 185

    My all woman shortlist

    Esther Ranzid

    Pippa Middleton

    Sally Oldcow

    Chris Bryant

  186. 186
    Ryker says:

    u mad bro?

  187. 187
    Roscoe Rules says:

    But child abuse happened at the BBC, y’know on the fucking premises.

  188. 188
    George Howard, Baron Howard of Henderskelfe says:

    I was a safe pair of hands. And I wouldn’t be any trouble now.

  189. 189
    Latimer Alder says:

    ….and most of them didn’t have 55,000 poor deluded followers who must have very sad and empty lives and need something to fill them.

  190. 190
    None of the above says:

    Really good to see Sallys self imposed Twitter exile working.

  191. 191
    JH3 says:

    I think there needs to be a popular resistance to the TV license properly initiated in this country. It worked in Australia.

    Very few people buy the Guardian because it is a load of sanctimonious, self-satisfied Islingtonista cleverer-than-you bullshit. Accordingly, they hover on collapse.

    Unfortunately the BBC gets to inhabit the same mindset, except without market pressures to give it a valuable clue that very few people actually share their world view.

  192. 192
    Hugh Janus says:

    Bring on global warming, some warmer weather would be most welcome! Oh, I forgot, the climate has been cooling for quite a few years now…..

  193. 193
    None of the above says:

    If he did I am sure he would put his built up foot down and stop it.

  194. 194
    Latimer Alder says:

    It also occurs to me that his lawyers will be doing the important people first. The loquacious and misguided Ms Bercow is way down that list.

  195. 195
    Hugh Janus says:

    We already have 649 Woodentops in the House of Horrors….but sadly not one fit to do a properly important job.

  196. 196
    Sue d'Nymme says:

    What an absolute tosser

  197. 197
    don't panic Mr Mainwaring says:

    But because of her position as wife of one of one of the most powerful men in politics, her “followers” may place more credence in her twitter messages than other users. They may have felt she had access to information not yet in the public domain.
    She has abused her privileges and seriously undermined her husband’s role as Speaker.

  198. 198
    HenryV says:

    Couldn’t we have a reality TV programme to decide who gets the job? We might end up with a dancing dog or some inner city yoof dance troop but at least the public would have had a say.

  199. 199
    Engineer says:

    You forgot Jack Dromey.

  200. 200
    Anonymous says:

    Well nobody is perfect. A return to work package could be organised. I still think there is a great deal in his favour. For example his rather prickly personality means that he is far from biddable. He also has the advantage of being a member of several minorities; including being Scottish thus keeping them happy. He has experience of picking the battles and even the wars he wants to fight. He has extensive experience of making spending decisions, which is closely aligned to his experience of spending other people’s money. The cultural fit is undeniable and I cannot think of anyone better placed to take on the Armature Liberal Snobs that have replaced him in his previous job.

  201. 201
    Timmy Davie's Press Secretary says:

    ‘very few people actually share their world view.’

    That is because you people are just scum.

    Fit only to pay your BBC tax and shut up and listen to what we tell you. We are the chosen elite and don’t you forget it, Buster.

  202. 202
    JH3 says:

    Does anyone have the version of this where you can see the reflection of the ‘media handler’ frantically windmilling about what he should be saying?

    It’s like a bonus edition of The Thick of It.

  203. 203
    Anonymous says:

    FARM WORKER Over years,the lefties have infiltrated our once, beloved bbc and bloody trashed it.Tis a joy to watch the beeb implode,though sad at the same time.

  204. 204
    You must be joking says:

    Jeez, that list fills me with despair. Why didn’t you go the whole hog and include James Naughtie?

  205. 205
    Sally says:

    I’m not misguided, I’m just thick.

  206. 206
    @Sally Bercow says:

    I’m just an ordinary girl,Wife of the speaker of the house of commons and media whore,how did I know my Tweets to 55,000 followers,many in the press would cause so much trouble.

  207. 207
    Hugh Janus says:

    I am hoping that Bentwhistle’s obscene pay-off will do for Fatty Pang. He took him on, and he (presumably) approved yet another ridiculous contract where the greater the cock-up the bigger the payment – and then decided to double his 6 months pay to 12 months, on the basis that some self-important MPs might want to invite him in for a spot of grandstanding. Christ on a bike, no wonder we are fast disappearing down the proverbial plughole.

  208. 208
    Regent Street sausage says:

    What, Alice Miles, you mean? The office bicycle AIUI.

  209. 209
    Airey Belvoir says:

    After a few night sleeping in the jungle, Nadine probably will have ticks in her ‘female box’.

  210. 210
    Palace flunkey says:

    The man is simply vulgar,vulgar,vulgar….

  211. 211
    Aunt Mat says:

    As long as they have been to Eton and/or a member of the Bullingdon, then i’m ok with it.

  212. 212
    Timmy Davie's Enforcer says:

    @ryker

    Shouldn’t you be back at Broadcasting House by now?

    Timmy is about to call a senior managers’ meeting and you’d better be there or they’ll step you aside.

  213. 213
    Airey Belvoir says:

    Louise looks like the newest kitchen maid arriving at Downton Abbey in that photo.

  214. 214
    Anonymous says:

    Lord Alistair McAlpine would do a good job.

  215. 215
    Mornington Crescent says:

    The very same:

  216. 216
    Airey Belvoir says:

    Sooty and Sweep cannot be approached, as they have both lodged sexual abuse claims against the BBC who allowed the late Harry Corbett to anally interfere with them, live on televison.

  217. 217
    Airey Belvoir says:

    Moderated for mentioning Sooty/Sweep abuse allegations, WTF?

  218. 218
    Airey Belvoir says:

    Nice quote about Fat Pang : “Like somebody who has just been rudely awakened in his club armchair to find a severed head on his lap” (AA Gill).

  219. 219
    Rip van Wrinkle says:

    What a f*****g car crash that was!!

    Another t**t rises to the top.

  220. 220
    blub says:

    800 grands worth there, apparently.

  221. 221
    Biased Broadcasting Corporation says:

    I think you will find that the attention-seeking letter-writer last week was the one who wrote a patronising letter to the Prime Minister claiming to be the Fearless Seeker of Truth.

    Also known as Twatson.

  222. 222
    Anonymous says:

    What did Fatty Pang know about the Newsnight programme and when? He seems to have been more in the loop than Entwistle yet seems to have asked no questions. Another smug *unt who needs disembowelling.

  223. 223
  224. 224
    Climate Change U Boat Kapitan says:

    Your name vill also go on the list.

  225. 225
    blub says:

    I’d vote for Piers Morgan on condition he was turned into a woman first.

  226. 226
    Rip van Wrinkle says:

    I bet you do.

  227. 227
    post hoc says:

    The interim DG is no better than the last one – he can’t even do a decent news briefing. Just seen car crash announcement on SKY done in the style of new labour luvvie. Where do they find them from?

  228. 228
    Latimer Alder says:

    Angela Rippon has some cojones and doesn’t suffer fools gladly.

    So both those estimable qualities disqualify her :-(

  229. 229
    Latimer Alder says:

    Or rhe guy who did ‘This is Spinal Tap’. Or ‘Airplane’.

  230. 230
    blub says:

    cage fight

  231. 231
    Latimer Alder says:

    Nancy!

  232. 232
    Ryker says:

    lol u mad 2 bro?

    and u got the apostrophe wrong

    doh!

  233. 233
    Biased Broadcasting Corporation says:

    Just read Guido’s quote from the BIJ to Leveson (top right.) ‘Gold standard of journalism.’ (Failed) CSE level standard, more like.

  234. 234
    Magnolia says:

    If Mr Neil or Mr Kelvin are unavailable then I think we should also consider Mr James Delingpole and Dr David Starkey.
    Such polite, collegiate types would be able to do the necessary.
    Failing that I nominate Baroness Warsi.
    There’s plenty of choice there.
    I think this might have opened up the floodgates.
    The journalists that are left might now go native and try to outcompete each other with nastiness and vitriol towards their incompetent, tormentor, controlling managers and administrators. They’ve broken free.
    We got hints of that this morning on Today from Ed Stouton.
    Right wingers of the BBC (?) this is your chance to sock it to them!
    The praise and devotion directed towards terrier Humphrys will be noticed and some might try to emulate him.

  235. 235
    Cherrie Blair says:

    Tony Blair would be a great choice, but the BBC would have to offer more than the £2.5M that JP Morgan are currently paying him.

  236. 236
    CHRIST ON A BIKE! says:

    It doesn’t really matter who get’s the job, they’ll just be there to close the place down.

    Once the prosecutions follow the police investigations and the true extent of the culture of perversion, criminality and cover-ups, comes to light.

    They’ll be history, literally. Their brand will scrubbed from everything it touches.

  237. 237
    M says:

    Where Fred Goodwin ?

  238. 238
    Dr Fatson says:

    Oh well. They might dislodge the moths that have lately taken up residence there.

  239. 239
    Ahead of the curve says:

    You are really scared, aren’t you Sally.

  240. 240
    Ahead of the curve says:

    ……and not on to you Sally.

  241. 241
    Dr Fatson says:

    Portillo would actually be a rather good fit.

    Tory gone native. Smooth. Broadcast experience etc.

    Ooooh! Scary!

  242. 242
    M says:

    They also do the same thing to the economy

  243. 243
    Dr Fatson says:

    Another Milliband PhotoBomb!

  244. 244
    Dr Fatson says:

    Your mockney accent is worse than fucking Dick Van Dyke’s.

  245. 245
    Dr Fatson says:

    Ryker old son.

    Your memes need updating.

  246. 246
    Judge Dread says:

    The great British public do not appear to me to have any great love affair with the BBC.

    The fact that many MP’s constantly state it is a national treasure providing value for money for the taxpayer is in my view nonsense.

    WE live in austere times . The average member of the public would rather pay an extra 3p for a litre of petrol than £145.50 per year from their net income for a broadcasting service .

  247. 247
    YorkshireLad says:

    Whoever it is, “The Guardian” would have to approve as would the Liebor party

  248. 248
    Poorly Educated Little Englander says:

    Heseltine or Tebbit then.

  249. 249
    Little Englander says:

    Sounds like just the job for either Sophie or Sandra from Accounts. They could job-share if one of them needs to count the cash or feed the kids.

  250. 250
    Anonymous says:

    We don’t always get what we wish for.

  251. 251
    Vehicle Sales Person says:

    … who, it is said, changed his name from Penis Transit Lezzy.

  252. 252
    Well done the BBC says:

    Dear Points of View,

    I’d nearly lost all faith in the BBC until the arrival of its hilarious new comedy-drama “The Decline and Collapse of a Wonderful Institution Universally Loved By Everybody” (BBC News24). Some of the plot-lines are a bit unbelievable as are one or two of the characters, but it was inevitable that a reliable old ham such as Fatty Pang would put in a solid performance as hapless bungler Lord Patten.

    I’m afraid Tim McInerney struggled slightly with the one-dimensional Director General Entwistle, although his catchphrase “What the f**k’s going on here, then?” has gone down a storm in our household and it’s a shame he was written out of the plot at such an early stage. I love the creation of a new ‘Er Indoors character in the shape of News Director Helen Boaden, who you never actually get to see.

    Bradley Walsh is good as the TV Centre car-park attendant whistled up to ‘fill in’ as Acting DG, and of the secondary characters Sally Bercow is very convincing as herself and should win one of the big prizes at the upcoming British Massive Compensation Awards Ceremony at Bow Street Magistrates court. Jabba the Hutt, though, doesn’t come anywhere near projecting the right sense of poisonous malice in the role of Labour MP Tom Watson and also needs to put on a few pounds.

    Have been riveted to the TV and hope the Beeb lasts long enough to bring us the conclusion of this knockabout tale of staggering incompetence. Worth the license fee by itself.

  253. 253
    Aged contributor says:

    What about Mexican Pete, the bandit (is that too far back for you all?)

  254. 254
    Aged contributor says:

    Anyone remember the name of that asset-stripper bloke from the 1960s who made a fortune buying ailing factories, selling off the land and then closing them all down?

  255. 255
    Aged contributor says:

    So cold, it looks like No 153 needs a ‘P’.

  256. 256
    Old Tory Bigot says:

    BBC Aviation proudly present the BBC Vickers Mark III Flying Boat

    – All the engines are mounted on the left wing

    – The aircrew compliment will be 5 pilots, 13 co-pilots, 32 trolly dollies, but no navigator

    – No moral compass will be installed as we consider these obsolete

    – There will be no ‘economy’ accommodation of any sort

    – Golden parachutes will be provided for all crew and but there will be no life vests for the licence payers passengers

    – A complementary compulsory copy of the Guardian will be found on each seat.

    Prototype trials have shown that the Mark III tends to fly in ever decreasing circles but we plan to fix this by adding more engines to the left wing.

  257. 257
    Old Tory Bigot says:

    Bravo

  258. 258
    Kcud akcuf says:

    Nah cun’t pay him enough millions.

  259. 259
    Ian Corby says:

    Ian Corby from the PRU should be running the BBC.

  260. 260
    Anonymous says:

    Paddy Power’ll quote you a price.

  261. 261
    Bri says:

    They will go for the bird that didn’t get the job when Entwistle took over and took umbrage and resigned, I can’t remember her name and can’t be arsed to Google it.

  262. 262
    Napolean says:

    gibber gibber gibber. where’s my rubber shoes and foil hat. They’re reading my thoughts a tell you! Don’t trust microwave ovens or UHT milk! gibber gibber gibber Beam my up Scotty!

  263. 263
    dunstall says:

    Unfortunately he will be dead by now

  264. 264
    Harriet Harman says:

    This woman was in charge of news yet she is not expected to resign.

    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2231648/Now-BBC-news-director-Helen-Boaden-deputy-step-aside-child-abuse-fiasco-temporarily.html

    It just shows the sexism in society that there is one rule for men and another for women!

  265. 265
    Harriet Harman says:

    Janet Street-Porter it should be then as she has the working class credentials to relate to the British public.

  266. 266
    Harriet Harman says:

    Jo Brand has many years of broadcasting experience and connects with the great British public

  267. 267
    Harriet Harman says:

    Surely you mean Cherie as Tony is not a woman

  268. 268
    Harriet Harman says:

    Obviously would Dianne Abbott bleed enough for you?

  269. 269
    Sally Bercow says:

    have better things to do…
    and by this I mean Rampant Rabbit

  270. 270
    this septic pile says:

    one is rooting for JEDWARD – two brains can be thikcer than one!

  271. 271
    john prescott says:

    can I be both COMMISIONATOR and GOVERNATOR at the same time

  272. 272
    HenryV says:

    Hamster or budgie?

  273. 273
    Gordon Brown says:

    Sooty / Sweep allegations ? I blame Sue.

  274. 274
    JH3 says:

    Bwa ha, tres drole.

    – There will also be no black box as it is clearly racist, and if there is a crash rather than actually investigate we will just wheel someone out to say lessons have been learned, and over the balance of the entire flight we think we got things ‘about right’.

    – People will also be compelled to buy a ‘BBC Vickers License’ under threat of prison, regardless of whether they actually fly. We will send out aggressive, sneaky people to turn up on peoples doorsteps and try to get them to incriminate themselves in order to get a commission.

  275. 275
    JH3 says:

    Ironic that you get a better standard of wit on here than on the BBC’s entire range of output.

    Ironic, but not surprising. The BBC is drowning in it’s own sanctimony and self-delusion.

  276. 276
    Kreatcherr says:

    Thought that was that dipsy yank Mittens Romneytard?

  277. 277
    Kreatcherr says:

    Gary Glitter…got an impressive CV…and at least plod will know where he is…or is supposed to be!

  278. 278
    JH3 says:

    Christ, Sally Bercow’s ex must have really pissed her off.

  279. 279
    Marcus Brigstocke says:

    I tick all the boxes.

  280. 280
    Judge Dread says:

    So let me get this right .

    These companies employ people in this country many of whom pay income tax and National insurance ,take out mortgages and loans and consume .

    These companies rent commercial units and pay commercial rents and local taxes when other companies have collapsed leaving empty units and rental voids .

    These companies also pay Vat .

    But because they do not pay this Government loads of Corporation Tax they are crooks.

  281. 281
    Anonymous says:

    Why’s his dog wearing a hat?

  282. 282
    Latimer Alder says:

    Update update update

    Clever blogger ‘omnologos’ has legally liberated the information that the Beeb tried so hard to keep confidential. They appointed six (yes 6) lawyers to go to court for them. But omnologos just used a bit of nous, not the law, and found it easily.

    http://bishophill.squarespace.com/blog/2012/11/12/bbc-climate-28-revealed.html

    It really hasn’t been a good week for the Beeb has it? Let’s hope it gets considerably worse!

    ROFLMFAO

  283. 283
    Kreatcherr says:

    ‘But because they do not pay this Government loads of Corporation Tax they are crooks.’

    Yep three rights don’t make a wrong right!
    It is not about minimizing their tax bill it is about avoiding it, and it is rather disingenuous to claim anything else!

  284. 284
    PAul says:

    Funbags flanagan

  285. 285
    David King says:

    How about Charles Allen?.Highly experienced media operator, no nonsense commercial operator, well connected and highly thought of by the politicos after his involvement with the Commonwealth and Olympic Games, must be worth an outside bet!!


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