November 7th, 2012

Nadine Dorries, I Presume…


  1. 1
    xxx says:

    You would though…..

  2. 2
    Old Tory Bigot says:

    On CiF

    As one commentator puts it “the day irony died…”

  3. 3
    I'd let Nads touch my nads says:

    You would, wouldn’t you?

  4. 4
  5. 5
    Erskine May says:

    I shall be voting for UStriP.

  6. 6
    Aunty Matter says:

    I would

  7. 7
    Airey Belvoir says:


  8. 8

    What a fucking liberty

  9. 9
    gonads says:

    I like the photo’s properties.

  10. 10
    Aunty Matter says:

    Margaret Moran has really demeaned the role

  11. 11
    Demon says:

    Well, it’d be rude not to

  12. 12
    Charlie the Chump says:

    Nice tits. Don’t forget to pay back the £5 grand of your MP’s salary you wont be earning while fucking about in the undergrowth.

  13. 13
    None of the above says:

    and I have just release my first shot !

  14. 14
    Crazy Tony says:

    221,856 bytes ?

  15. 15
    Mad Nad says:

    G’day cobblers.

  16. 16
    One month absence from serving her constituents says:

    Funny. If this was any other MP who was neglecting their duties to their constituents, Guido would be all over them. But as it’s loopy Nadine Dorries, she gets a pass, presumably because Guido would like to be all over her.

  17. 17
    Mad Nad says:

    What’s an about?

  18. 18
    Nan Taylor says:

    They all demean, or demeaned in La Minge’s case, the position of MP. Self-serving, troughing, lying, self-aggrandising, corrupt, perverted, greedy, thieving bastards. La Minge will be back for another go some day in the belief that some party or other couldn’t possibly do without her. Horrible filthy parasites – like the bacteria in my leg ulcers.

  19. 19
    ®©¿ says:

  20. 20
    Lord Jensen Interceptor says:

    Denis McShane told me she only does anal.

  21. 21
    Snaplegs says:

    No actually, I don’t think I would

  22. 22
    Nan Taylor says:

    How is she these days? Well enough to be prosecuted? Oh, thought as much.
    Corrupt, see? The lot of them.

  23. 23
    Gonk II says:

    She won’t look like that in a couple of days with a giant Echidna clamped to her left one.

  24. 24
    i like gold says:

    i like gold

  25. 25
    ÁC1 says:

    I’m not a tit man, but she does have good chesticles.

  26. 26
    Ant and/or Dec says:

    We will prove the two into one will go

  27. 27
    F. Inga-Ina de Dijk says:

    Get ‘em off, Nads, and flash us your lilies!
    Can I come over and probe in the bush?
    Kisses everywhere.

  28. 28
    Gordon Brown says:

    i am the Prime Minister, get me out of here

  29. 29
    Lord Mooncrater says:

    All women sit on a goldmine and this one knows how to use it.

  30. 30
    Spiny Aunt Eater says:

    I’m hungry

  31. 31
    Aunty Matter says:

    Funny how shecgetscall the hate yet Macshit and that other drunk jock twat who tried to punch out a few Tories gets away with it.

    Then we have McSnot who has spent the last 2 years at tax payers expense writing about how he fucked the world. I hope we all get a cut of the 3 copies he sells.

    Then we have been lids who use theirosition to make money by writing books or heading up think tanks.

    Nads might be mad and taking us for a ride, but in the grand scheme of things, shes’s small beer.

  32. 32
    Industrial Light & Magic says:

    Our technology being used well. Although I would recommend a +6 on the ‘selfish cow’ filter next time.

  33. 33
    Leg ulcers says:


  34. 34
    Peter Grimes says:

    Too bloody right I would. She’s got a good photographer there, too.

  35. 35
    Mad Nads says:

    My two tits are called Dave & Gideon

  36. 36
    Chutney Monkey says:

    I guess she will be complaining next week that she is not taken seriously

  37. 37
    Attention to detail says:

    Original address without go nads was

    Now been changed to gonads1 with go nads

  38. 38
    Georgous George says:

  39. 39
    Gonk II says:


  40. 40
    Which one is Ant? says:

    No doubt Ant and Dec will have her eating Dick at the first possible chance.

  41. 41
    Broadsword calling Danny Boy says:

    I think it is particularly dangerous to give a scouser the oxygen of publicity.

  42. 42
    Mad Frankie's Older Sister says:


  43. 43
    terry thomas says:

    But Old Boy, Ding Dong.

  44. 44
    Georgous North says:

  45. 45
    Lord Alpine says:

    I’m a child ràping grandee in Italy with powerful connections, just try and get me out of here!

  46. 46
    Broadsword calling Danny Boy says:

    Or maybe Dec will have her eating Ant? Who will know?

  47. 47
    Dianne Abbot says:

    I can’t wait for Nadine to recreate this scene:

  48. 48
    Kebab Time theorem says:

    And why does 81lly neve post when its a female being mentioned? Is he Gordon Brown?

  49. 49
    Anonymous says:

    What is Cameron’s problem with women? He takes the wipe off a women but hasn’t done anything about the Tory peado. Almost everyone with internet know who these people are and what horrible things they did to kids. We also know who set up the earlier cover up.

    Why there is no action from Cameron?

  50. 50
    Bogeyman says:

    I do wish all these disapproving bores would f uk off. So what if she absents herself for a month? The one-eyed bogey muncher disappears for months on end.

    Her constituency will still be there when she gets back, not a jot worse for her absence.

    I noticed a Guardianista yesterday comparing her with the virtuous socialist Dennis Skinner, who apparently has not missed a parliamentary session for 40 years. Big deal. What’s he done apart from sit there scowling?

  51. 51
    None of the above says:

    and pissing himself on a few occasions

  52. 52
    illogical says:

    OT. Good luck with the nads, Nads?
    I must assume Guido refers to Nadine using Oz’s famed beauty product for the inevitable bikini line photos that will be taken.
    For gentlemen wishing to follow her example of a clean, hair free result this link is not to be overlooked.

    I haven’t laughed so much in aeons

  53. 53
    splendid says:

    I’m looking forward to her having a wash down by the river and soaping up those big knockers

  54. 54
    Jimmy says:

    I think you may overestimate how upset the public is at the thought of punching out tories.

  55. 55
    Gone on another photo opportunity, Cameron? says:

    Man named Ben, who was cared for at the home, says he had his trousers pulled down for Savile’s ‘entertainment’ and so did other boys at the home

    High-profile visitors to the home allegedly included 2 senior former Tories

    ‘Children whose parents had died in horrific circumstances were targeted more because they knew nothing could be done about it’, says Mr Gregory

    Read more:–Jimmy-Savile-regular-visitor.html#ixzz2BYHiFxbC
    Follow us: @MailOnline on Twitter | DailyMail on Facebook

  56. 56
    Red Egg..... says:

    Looks like the markets are loving Obama getting back in ………

  57. 57
    Tay King-dePisse says:

    It is now official: Nadine Dorries will take over as PILF (Politician I’d Like to Fornicate with), for those very few Young Tory lads remaining who are not poofs or nonces. She replaces Louise Mensch, who held the honour for the past two years, till she swanned off to the States, where she is currently working hard at becoming a FoxNews anchorblonde. Nadine will hold the honour till 2015, when she is expected not to stand again, and to swan off to Australia to be that nation’s version of LouLou.

  58. 58
    Joe E says:

    Good to see Guido enraged with this folly whilst Dorries is being paid out of the public purse

  59. 59
    Red Egg..... says:

    Five live at 0500 had Richard Bacon wittering on and having orgasms over the election result…….. 1530 this afternoon he is back on Five Live broadcasting from a US bowling alley….. the man is a flocking useless hunt…… !!

  60. 60
    Dennis Skinner says:

    This is why I wear old clothes in Parliament.

  61. 61
    The Yorkshire Ripper, Broadmoor. says:

    Listen to radi 2 yesterday on the vine programme to see what the results are.

    I’d shoot you dead whilst eating my dinner.

  62. 62
    Mad Nad says:

    That’s Leslie Phillips you absolute shower!

  63. 63
    Tit Watch says:

    She’ll get them babies out under the waterfall, I’m confident of that.

  64. 64
    Nads says:

    Breast relief, £50.

  65. 65
    President Obathhouse says:

    Who is this guy “Dave”? Fucking limey fag keeps calling me Barack, like he wants to suck my cock. Doesn’t he know that’s Rahm’s job?

  66. 66
    smoggie says:

    Used to work in Brisbane – I bet that shot was taken in the Botanical Gardens, which is right in the city centre.

  67. 67
    Mad Nad says:

    Leave Eric Pickles out of it!

  68. 68
    smoggie says:

    Will Ant and Dec have her eating gonads in the jungle? I’d pay good money to see that.

  69. 69
    A breast man says:

    I would.

  70. 70
    Mad Nad says:

    You bet I will!

  71. 71
    Gonk II says:

    Likewise Simon Schama on this morning. He was so excited I thought he
    was going to self-pollute on air.

  72. 72
    through the back door says:

    I’m sure you have Michael.

  73. 73
    New Statesman feminist says:

  74. 74
    Patrick Power says:

    No chance I’m sorry to say.

    I’m a Celebrity Outright: 7/2 Brian Conley 4/1 Charlie Brooks 11/2 Helen Flanagan 7/1 David Haye 14/1 Eric Bristow:

  75. 75
    anonymouse says:

    Wish I was the chief whip.

  76. 76
    Tom Catesby says:

    F**k Parliament! Yes we can!(yes we would)

  77. 77
    Costume Department says:

    Wouldn’t mind betting it was taken in the UK.

  78. 78
    through the back door says:

    So, how much do you pay Fawkes to let you post shite on here?

  79. 79
    Patrick Power says:

    Alright then,here we go fellas.

    Nadine Dorries Specials Hide
    Singles Only. Applies to the duration of the series. Dorries quote must be broadcast.
    Local constituency party to announce that she will not be the candidate at next general election
    To join UKIP before the next general election
    To receive the most bushtucker trials
    To quit the show of her own accord
    To be eliminated by public vote first
    To to Strictly Come Dancing 2013

  80. 80
    Anonymous says:

    I knew there was something dodgy about you smoggs

  81. 81
    Anonymous says:

    Have you been asleep for the past week? there are about 7 enquiries going on into these allegations, would you rather people were thrown in to clink without evidence or a trial, in case they are guilty. Yours is a mob mentality.

  82. 82
    Andy Coulson says:

    Isn’t Charlie Brooks Rebekah’s old man?

    Oy Vey,is he messhugah ?

  83. 83
    Anonymous says:

    A fruitcake with tits, what more would you want?

  84. 84
    Tom Catesby says:

    No! He said, ‘and anal!’

  85. 85
    Anonymous says:

    Very pleasant considering the hysterical posts about child abuse on here. You couldnt make it up.

  86. 86
    Tom Catesby says:

    My Nan says, you’re right!

  87. 87
    Anonymous says:

    I think all you old dears drooling over mad nad really need to get out more,unless the nurses wont let you go out.

  88. 88
    tat's tit says:

    Why break the habit of a lifetime smoggie?

  89. 89
    Anonymous says:

    Is she really only 55?

  90. 90
    Barking Obama says:

    Yo m&&&erf&&ker, youse going down.

  91. 91
    Nuts says:

    Is she really only 55?

  92. 92
    Anonymous says:

    Inquiry? Do you mean another cover up? How many more years?

    He could just ask the victims the name of these people, announce there name in parliament and kick them out of the house.

    I am sure public will do the rest as long as they know government is on there side and not protecting the peados.

  93. 93
    Anonymous says:

    I would prefer it if the inadequates in the shadow cabinet were punched out instead if its all the same to you.

  94. 94
    Nuts says:

    Bloody photoshop working overtime on the old croc if you ask me

  95. 95
    smoggie says:

    The Asian markets, yes. What does that tell the small investor? (PS I’m 5′ 11″)

  96. 96
    Anonymous says:

    She doesnt look like it now ! photoshop.

  97. 97
    Feeling down says:

    Cannot wait to see Nadine in a similar scene , wish all mp,s were like her instead of Ed Balls

  98. 98
    smoggie says:

    You obviously ain’t been there, Anons. Fabulous city except that you can’t get a decent pint.

  99. 99
    Anonymous says:

    I will be surprise if Tory lads are bothered about women.

  100. 100
    Mitt says:

    Yep, DOW down 283 points and counting.

  101. 101
    The History man says:

    Not forgetting Labour’s once millionaire dominated inner-circle. How much are TB and Mandelson worth these days? Only slightly more than Ed Milllionaireband.

  102. 102
    Danny Blanchflower says:

    Wall St. drops stocks a few % points to remind Obama who’s in charge. No need for O to start thinking he’s in charge…

  103. 103
    Anonymous says:

    What a world when having a bus driver for a Dad makes you a star. Pathetic.

  104. 104
    Sir Winston Churchill says:

    Spinning in my grave.

  105. 105
    Kebab travel update says:

    Please be careful if you are going to be driving on the A127 where it meets the M25 J27. A horse is currently loose.

  106. 106
    Handycock (Teen Fondler) says:

    How old is Nadine’s daughter? Boaz.

  107. 107
    Anonymous says:

    Charlie Brooks is a woman. She is on Eastenders. Do you think Rebbekahs husband would go on this rubbish when you consider how much she got as a pay off from Murdoch ? wake up at the back.

  108. 108
    Dont't panic! Don't panic! says:

    RIP Clive Dunn, age 92. Bless ‘im.

  109. 109
    smoggie says:

    Why indeed?

  110. 110
    An MP says:

    I have and I still do! Lovely, fuck off plebs!

  111. 111
    Anonymous says:

    judicial inquiry. in zee open.
    but patience Dear friends.
    it will all be revealed kinda like the mp.s expenses though i dare say there will be some shredding to protect those who are even more protected than youknowhoo. paedo’s are hidden in plain sight. who protects them? BBC.
    free.mason.s….who are these folks that the chap on the street is bewildered about. The public will have its way, it is just waiting to get the full rot in view. sensible public.

  112. 112
    smoggie says:

    Fuck any due process or trial coz this is a demockrassie.

  113. 113
    G. 'Top of the pops' Kauffmann says:

    The cnut Bacon once described himself as ‘A minor celebrity’ – I dispute the ‘celebrity’.

  114. 114
    Mad Nad says:

    Don’t call me loopy and give me back my whip!

  115. 115
    Red Egg..... says:

    Just wondering how long before someone makes a sex allegation against him??

  116. 116
    Anonymous says:

    Well its not a cover up, I mean they have named at least three celebs who have had unproven allegations against them but refuse to name the polotician.
    Of course it,s not a cover up !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  117. 117
    Anonymous says:

    I wouldn’t mind having a rummage in her undergrowth.

  118. 118
    Jimmy says:

    They are both, of course, priceless.

  119. 119
    SaltPetre says:

    I’m sure it wouldn’t be the first time she has had testicles in her mouth.

  120. 120
    Dont panic dont panic says:

    A much loved comedy character.
    RIP Clive

  121. 121
    Jimmy says:

    ITV has suspended Lily Savage after it emerged she is to take time off from its jungle-based reality show I’m a Celebrity … Get Me Out of Here to serve as MP for Mid Bedfordshire

    Her decision to become the first serving contestant to take part in the legislature, which features famous faces performing in stunts that in the past have included handing over control of the country’s media to Rupert Murdoch, destroying the NHS and making George Osborne Chancellor of the Exchequer, could keep her off TV for a month.

    Colleagues reacted with surprise and she faced a barrage of criticism. By early evening, ITV had confirmed that the producers had withdrawn the invitation from Savage, who did not ask them for permission to take part.

    A spokesperson said: “We … will have an urgent meeting with her when she gets back. The concern is that she will not be getting sufficient publicity in the meantime.”

    The former Chick Lit “writer” Louise Mental, who gave up her drug habit to spend two years as an MP, was among those who took to Twitter to criticise Savage’s decision.

    “Nothing sadder than a celebrity, or ex-celebrity, in parliament,” she said. “Just imagining the scene in my agent’s office if I said I wanted to skip making proper money for weeks to go on the Parliament Channel. Again.”

    She added: “Lily pretending that a serious issue like abortion rights is why she did this is the lowest of the low. Indefensible stuff.”

  122. 122
    Broadsword calling Danny Boy says:

    Don’t panic, don’t panic.

    They don’t like it up ‘em Captain Mainwaring.

  123. 123
    Laughing hangman says:

    x 100,000,000

  124. 124
    Marmite says:

    Yes ‘Don’t panic’. Clive Dunn came from a more gentle era. Oh to have those days back. It’s just a bleeding free for all these days.

    RIP Clive.

  125. 125
    Anonymous says:


  126. 126
    nigelforengland says:

    I think I just have.

  127. 127
    Marmite says:

    Nan, are you Elsie Beatties sister by any chance? We haven’t heard from her for ages. Has she gone to her Reg I wonder?

  128. 128
    Marco Whirlwind says:


  129. 129
    The savant says:

    Not any more rahm s. mayor of chicago now. ..

    Does not. do blow jobs any more.

    Has developed instead a penchant for farting against th breeze .

    Well chicago is after all the windy city …

  130. 130
    Chris Bryant says:

    Women make great secretaries and tea makers.

  131. 131
    The savant says:

    Yeah. …. And what an. Aaaaaaassss

  132. 132
    The savant says:

    Ohhh… Not newton and ridley then ..

    Next you ll. be conning us into believing you are NOT a. Fur. Coat /no knickers. Type of lady .

  133. 133
    The savant says:

    As. My. Girlfriend would admit to ;

    before the main event i do like a good long gobble. .

  134. 134
    dunstall says:

    Is it Shergar?

  135. 135
    moby dick says:

    shes joined the green party

  136. 136
    Tommy says:

    From the RespectYourself.Info webbsite. Masturbation section

    One final point, whilst masturbation is nothing to be ashamed of, it is considered bad manners to do it in public. Generally, masturbation is something you do in private rather than at the dinner table or in polite company.

    So that will be when watching I’m a Celeb then.

  137. 137
    dunstall says:

    Yeah right on reality check for all these f….. liberals

  138. 138
    6 Months behind. says:

    Guido this kind of article is really trivial and shallow, the next thing we know you will be pimping yourself on a dowmarket tabloid run by a pornographer.

  139. 139
    Cato says:

    No nipples though…where’s the nipples?

  140. 140
    dunstall says:

    The most useless cnut in Parliament 46 years and achieved f… All

  141. 141
    Ehtch says:

    Nads Dorries, jesus chroist! Reality TV reaches Tory HQ – we are doomed.

    I’d shag it though.

  142. 142
    yvette cooper lady boy says:

    I would tasty

  143. 143
    Blakey says:

    When will it all end?

  144. 144
    I used to think all women just constantly looked for attention says:

    Credit where credits due Jimmy, thats actually quite funny.

  145. 145
    smoggie says:

    ..although still open to offers from the highest bidder.

  146. 146
    Bollox says:

    A more gentle era ? You sure about that as we seem to be spending all our resources on setting up inquiries into what went on behind the scenes during this “more gentle era”.

  147. 147
    Leciester Piggot says:

    Is it Sarah Jessica Parker or Jerry Hall ?

  148. 148
    Mighty Mucky Westminster says:

    Looking very Milfy but sadly lacking in the nipps department, maybe getting a bit hot wet and sweaty will help.

  149. 149
    Leciester Piggot says:

    I heard she’s currently providing Police with statements as she was one of Jimmy Saviles first guests on Jim’l fix it from 1903

  150. 150
    Max says:

    Waiting to see her noshing something exotic

  151. 151
    Anonymous says:

    What bit?

  152. 152
    James Gordon McMong says:

    And beards!

  153. 153
    XXX says:

    Are you are sure it is a photo op at kew or that place in Devon, they can fake anything these days, surely she wouldn’t wear nail varnish in the jungle

  154. 154
    Sue Perkins says:

    Nadine might be 55 but she’s a million times hotter than you Helen – you fuck ugly dyke!

  155. 155
    Bernard Jenkin says:

    You just know she’s such a dirty bitch. I bet she loves a cock in each hole. I bet she shags like a Minx.

  156. 156
    George says:

    Have to admit, I’ve always had a thing for Nadine. I might actually watch the show just as an excuse to look at her body ;)

  157. 157
    George says:

    One cock in every hole? Please we’re talking two at least in each one

  158. 158
    Cllr Big Boy says:

    Is Dorries the female Tory MP who was banging a young Councillor in a hotel room, that was videoed by the Whips?

  159. 159
    Anonymous says:

    The Claire Short of the Conservative Party but without the intellect. Collect your P45 money grubbing Hunt.

  160. 160
    George says:

    Why is this not on the internet somewhere?

  161. 161
    Anonymous says:

    The profession of the airbrush artist is a lonely calling

  162. 162
    Owner of a Hairy Magnet says:

    You guys are just sexist pigs and as vile as savile was.

  163. 163
    Brown out and PAY ME DAMAGES. I am fed up with ugly, immature, mong. What is there to like? says:

    Very tiresome.

  164. 164
    G Brown lover of Prudence says:

    To him wimmin are disgusting.

  165. 165
    Remittance Man says:

    And your point is …?

  166. 166
    Moby dick says:

    Daily star


  167. 167
    Sir Bulging Trouser says:

    She should be doing the job she was elected to do…idiot tart!!

  168. 168
    PM says:

    Just had a wank.

  169. 169
    Tit Watch says:

    I’m a charitable person and I do this for free.
    Consider it a publice service.

    38c at a guess.

  170. 170
    The German general who is always having a new uniform fitted. says:

    I bet Mad Nad will get a bit of crafty cocky in woods when no one is looking.

  171. 171
    Disco Biscuit says:

    Well that’s been PhotoShopped.

  172. 172
    Anonymous says:

    I know I need help but I would be up that like a rat up a drainpipe.

  173. 173
    smo­ggie says:

    Brill :)


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