November 1st, 2012

Albert the Snake: FCO Rattled While Twitter Puns

Further to Guido’s exposing of Hague’s snake:

It’s like something out of Monty Python…


219 Comments

  1. 1
    Jerry! Jerry! says:

    Don’t miss Jerry Springer on a US election special of Question Time tonight.

  2. 2
    Beast says:

    Hague spotted wearing leather Boa

  3. 3
    Steve Miliband says:

    Fangs to Guyana

  4. 4
    Beast says:

    Prescott turns up after he mishears that the FCO have a huge pieathon

  5. 5
    Beast says:

    Slippery customer Hague loves a spot of guy(ana)

  6. 6
    Screwed Taxpayer says:

    Why didn’t they wind it around Hague’s neck and strangle the pillock?

  7. 7
    Bob Hope says:

    “Fangs for the memory”

  8. 8
    Gonk II says:

    I couldn’t give a monkeys about a dog-eared old snake.

  9. 9
    Fox and Laws Ponces-R-Us says:

    Suits You, Sir.

  10. 10
    Alegra Stratton says:

    I won’t be reporting this. Even I couldn’t swallow it. However Sally…??

  11. 11
    A Woman of Colour says:

    It am waycist – de whitey snakes am de wurst!

  12. 12
    Dean B says:

    “Well, you did ask me to arrange seeing a herpetologist”

  13. 13
    Ex Ah! Monika says:

    More like a worm. THIS is a snake

  14. 14
    UKIP.i.am says:

    Rumours of a dangerous adder creeping in the dark corners of Westminster were explained by a rare sighting of Gordon Brown.

  15. 15
    Beast says:

    Mandelson the snakekike

  16. 16
    John Prescott says:

    I went to an all you can eat buffet. They threw me out after 5 hours. Why call it all you can eat if I’m not allowed to have all I can eat?

  17. 17
    Sparkler says:

    It was tough in the jungle, walked around for a week with a snake wrapped around my neck, thought it was my scarf!.

  18. 18
    Gonk II says:

    EEK !

  19. 19
    Gordon Brown says:

    I understand that the song Gangnam Style is very popular and has had 600 million views on Youtube. I would like it to be known that I wrote, produced and performed the song and played all the instruments too, which in a post-endogenous macro economic framework based on prudence has seen a real terms increase in Youtube views.

  20. 20
  21. 21
    S.T.U.N says:

    Or Seb Coe caught wearing Hague hahaha

  22. 22
    Cato says:

    +25,000

  23. 23
    Cato says:

    Hague’s Snake. I’ll bet Jim’ll choked on that!

  24. 24
    Peter Grant says:

    The Naked Civil Serpent!

  25. 25
    Shakin Dave Cameron says:

    Not to mention lots and lots of guy anal.

  26. 26
    S.T.U.N says:

    Hahaha

  27. 27
    Jimmy says:

    Extravagant as it may seem, there is much to be said for sending visiting dignitaries the subliminal message that we really are pleased to see them.

  28. 28
    Kebabs for Obama says:

    Rasmussen Daily Presidential Tracking Poll: Romney 49%, Obama 47%

  29. 29
    Hithing Thid says:

    I don’t think we should be getting tied up in knots about this …

  30. 30
    Fox Tracking Poll says:

    Romney 115%, Obama 3%.

    Shome mishtake, Shirley?

  31. 31
    S.T.U.N says:

    Comment of the day

  32. 32
    Mine d'Boggles says:

    Well done, Beast.

  33. 33
    Gooey Blob says:

    Headline figures are usually cobblers and shouldn’t be taken too seriously. If you do, you end up like some people in the Labour Party who think Ed Miliband has an earthly in 2015…

  34. 34
    S.T.U.N says:

    Are you sure about telling people this Guido?

    “Further to Guido’s exposing of Hague’s snake”

  35. 35
    Fuck this blog says:

    A lot of trouser snakes at the BBC these days. They seem to like living up long dark brown holes.

  36. 36
    Meatspin made me dizzy says:

    Every time that tosser comes on the wireless I can’t help think Tory Boy

  37. 37
    Bullshitting Bullying Cokeheads (BBC) says:

    Twitter is for twits. The snake is over a century old. Who really gives a shit. It is really pathetic watching substandard journalist scrapping over it!

  38. 38
    Jimmy says:

    “The 105 polls released in Senate and gubernatorial races [in 2010] by Rasmussen Reports and its subsidiary, Pulse Opinion Research, missed the final margin between the candidates by 5.8 points, a considerably higher figure than that achieved by most other pollsters. Some 13 of its polls missed by 10 or more points, including one in the Hawaii Senate race that missed the final margin between the candidates by 40 points, the largest error ever recorded in a general election in FiveThirtyEight’s database, which includes all polls conducted since 1998.

    “Moreover, Rasmussen’s polls were quite biased, overestimating the standing of the Republican candidate by almost 4 points on average. In just 12 cases, Rasmussen’s polls overestimated the margin for the Democrat by 3 or more points. But it did so for the Republican candidate in 55 cases — that is, in more than half of the polls that it issued.”

    [Nate Silver]

  39. 39
    8illy 8owden, the world's greatest umplre says:

    Just handbags.

  40. 40
    Aunty Matter says:

    Have to laugh at the British media. Now telling us that O’Bumma is gonna win because of a hurricane that killed loads of people. So rejoice!!

    Can you imagine if it were a Republican making political capital out of a disaster?

    What the BBC and other media can’t work out is why a fucking mong like Romney is running the son of god so close at all.

    Why St O’Bumma is the greatest being to have ever lived, I mean he can almost speak without an autocue

  41. 41
    Aunty Matter says:

    The BBC should be more concerned about who had their snake out for little girls back in the 70’s and 80’s on Top of the pops.

  42. 42
  43. 43
    Joss Ayinglike says:

    That was boring when it came out in September 2011.

  44. 44
    Jimmy the Dhimmi says:

    You’ve lost it totally.

  45. 45
    Kebab The Poet says:

    Ode to Guido

    God made coke, God made pepsi. God made me, oh so sexy. God made rivers, God made lakes. God made you, well, we all make mistakes.

  46. 46
    Jimmy says:

    You never had it.

  47. 47
    LOL says:

    ….and little boys.

  48. 48
    neothesis says:

    A cold blooded reptile squeezing the life out its victims, an unthinking uncaring monster with zero empathy or indeed any human traits whatsoever spending a fortune stuffing a snake.

  49. 49
    Stroppycow says:

    Handbags? Someone mention handbags? Are they made from snakeskin?

  50. 50
    Mad Frankie's Older Sister says:

    Bet even Ramsay would dare charge that much for stuffing him and selling him at £30 a portion

  51. 51
    Stroppycow says:

    You’ve met my ex then?

  52. 52
    (I've been renamed) DA-Notice says:

    Judo clinch.

  53. 53
    Mad Frankie's Older Sister says:

    £500 a foot

    Couldn’t they even have had the wit to run a sponsor a slice competition. he’d l; look well with those logos down the side – shell bp …BAE

  54. 54
    Mad Frankie's Older Sister says:

    Blame Health and safety – They wanted to make sure you would fit through the fire exit in an emergency

  55. 55
    gramma says:

    Guido exposing Hague’s snake? Obviously.
    The advantage of being born with a fawked tongue

  56. 56
    Hacker Fawkes says:

    Hurricane Sandy is estimated to have cost the US $60billion.

    Or a weekend’s takings at my local Cineworld.

  57. 57
    Dianne Abbot says:

    A black mamba regularly explores my office.

  58. 58
    Bleeding Squeaker says:

    Is it better to pay for a tax funded snake or Mock Tudor Beams?

    Or Phil Woolas’ tampons?

    BTW For those of you old enough to have endured the many Woolas idiocies in the past, the Benighted Woolas is now with a lobbying company (surprise surprise) with his wife and some other political has beens peddling what is left of their influence…one Conservtive, one LibDem and himself….just to cover all the a’holes as they say…

    http://wellingtonstreetpartners.com/what-we-do

    and

    http://boothwoodpartners.com/about-us/

  59. 59
    Expat Geordie says:

    Shouldn’t that be orifice?

  60. 60
    Expat Geordie says:

    + loads

  61. 61
    Aunty Matter says:

    Things don’t seem to be getting any better on the US east coast after the small storm do they? Compare that to the devastation of Katrina. But the BBC won’t blame O’Barmy.

    No food, no fuel, people still missing, no power and so on, yet the BBC call it a glorious day for O’Barmy

  62. 62
    Earl of Croydon says:

    At least it has a resale value.
    How much did we get for Prescotts failed fire brigade computer?!!

  63. 63
    Caligula's hoss says:

    Is there no end to the fuckwittery of this Government?

  64. 64
    Expat Geordie says:

    And mine.

  65. 65
    Anonymous says:

    There’s enough of Albert to make a new pair of clown shoes for Cameron.

  66. 66
    XXXX says:

    Good job it a stuffed one, little Willey would have made a satisfying meal for a real one

  67. 67
    Tachybaptus says:

    Well, of course it doesn’t. All you need to do is to switch off your modem, wait a minute, and switch it on again. New IP, no problem.

  68. 68
    Tachybaptus says:

    Come back Incitatus, all is forgiven.

  69. 69
    Flocking useless.... says:

    William, that is another fine mess you’ve got us in !!

  70. 70
    Question Brine says:

    On tonight’s Question Brine panel, Jerry Springer (go Jerry!), David Miliband (fuck off), Shami Chakrabarti (yawn), Kwasi Kwarteng (who are you?) and Colleen Graffey (who are you?).

  71. 71
    XXXX says:

    Don’t be rotten to our little Willy, what would Wavey Davey do without him

  72. 72
    Flocking useless.... says:

    Oh nooooooo breaking news….. Freddie Starr arrested…… can he actually remember that shag??

  73. 73
    A Survey says:

    On a a scale of one to ten thousand, how would your average taxpayer rate this as a waste of money?

  74. 74
    A Housewife says:

    I think I will do some hoovering.

  75. 75
    XXXX says:

    I don’t think Gordy was an adder he was more of a subtractor

  76. 76
    Flocking useless.... says:

    Kwasi Kwarteng he actually starred in Zulu the Movie :)

  77. 77
    Flocking useless.... says:

    Three minutes 45 years ago is just a little too much too far away !!

  78. 78
    ÁC1 says:

    You rarely get to run into a python these days.

  79. 79
    A Housewife says:

    I think I shall do a spot of ironing

  80. 80
  81. 81
  82. 82
    Flocking useless.... says:

    Looks like Freddie Starr’s ONE EYED TROUSER SNAKE has got him into bother 45 years after the event :)

  83. 83
    XXXX says:

    Guido ought to think about the old ladies with their blue rinses

  84. 84
    XXXX says:

    Little girls? Some of them seemed to be getting bigger as time passed and then suddenly disappeared

  85. 85
    XXXX says:

    A handbag, a handbag

  86. 86
    XXXX says:

    Go away

  87. 87
    Flocking useless.... says:

    Happy days……. as another one bites the dust !

  88. 88
    Expat Geordie says:

    What odds are the US bookies giving?

    I remember that in 2000 the British bookies were giving odds of 6/4 on a Bush win. Booking in the US were generally giving odds of 6/4 on a Gore win. If you could get into both markets you couldn’t lose.

  89. 89
    Fredderick Clinton-Star says:

    I did not have sexual relations with that woman

  90. 90
    ÁC1 says:

    almost.

  91. 91
    ÁCthe1&only says:

    My trouser snake need a good rub down with linseed oil to keep it supple.

  92. 92
    ÁC1 says:

    You just can’t accept the full refund offered. Maybe you will when your meds kick in.

  93. 93
    Anonymous says:

    I said fuck off to Question Time years ago.

  94. 94
    ÁC1 says:

    Sun Headline will read “Freddie Starr ate my Pussy”?

  95. 95
    ÁC1 says:

    Did they not hear about Ebay? or even freecycle?

  96. 96
    OnBenefits says:

    Cast your mind back to what Bush did after Katrina.

  97. 97
    Harriet Harman says:

    Don’t mention PIE.

  98. 98
    Anonymous says:

    Is this line-up redressing the balance after the audience last week showed their disdain for Labour views?

  99. 99
    ÁC1 says:

    He waited until the democrat party state leader invited the federal government in.

  100. 100
    ÁC1 says:

    One weekend of photocopying for Bernanke.

  101. 101
    Anonymous says:

    Awww….poor ickle Jimmy is gonna be so sad next week.

  102. 102
    Aunty Matter says:

    Katrina was no more Bush’s fault than Sandy is O’Bumma’s. The difference is the media. The BBC blamed Bush for everything that went wrong with Katrina but are hailing O’Bumma now. Yet I see homes destroyed and 4 days on no electricity, no water, no food, no fuel, queues and not a lot happening.

    But the BBC will blame Christy or other local Republicans if things are still going wrong in a couple of days. Even the mong Mat Frei on Channel 4 news was prattling a load of crap about massive poll swings. Go check them out yourself, they haven’t moved.

    If you also take a look at the main opinion poll sites O’Bumma hasn’t moved ahead in the polls, in fact they don’t appear to have moved much at all.

  103. 103
    Expat Geordie says:

    A few points:

    Apparently this version of Men of Harlech was especially written for the film. Accorden to Toby Harden in “Dead Men Risen” it is this version, and not the original, that is sung at Welsh Guards funerals.

    Of the 144 men at Rorke’s Drift only 22 were Welsh. 47 were English.

    The Regiment was the 2nd Battalion 24th Regiment of Foot, Royal Warwickshire Regiment (NOT South Wales Borderers).

    Colour Sergeant Frank Bourne, played by 6 foot something 38-year old Nigel Green as a 55-year old, was in fact 5’4” and only 24 years old. He died, aged 91 as Colonel Frank Bourne OBE DCM on 8th May 1945, the last British survivor of the battle and the highest ranking.

  104. 104
    Harlech says:

    Now THAT’s the sort of useful comment which we need more of round here.

  105. 105
    Beast says:

    Dianne Abbott says that big fat black mambas will go on the wall for their kids

  106. 106
  107. 107
    ÁC1 says:

    Hello Tat,

    Give my regards to your consultant psychiatrist and tell him he’ll start to make progress some day.

    All the best and get well soon!

  108. 108
    S.T.U.N says:

    Did Glitter Grass him up, one wonders…

    Was it a Gliiter plea bargain? We’ll let you have the 8 year old if you give us Freddie Starr.

  109. 109
    Anonymous says:

    the thru any means realists have been the victors.
    FCO the promotor of The British worldwide Brainwashing Corporation are realists. and the world in some senses still looks up to us.
    savile the purveyor of pleb children to higher ups in society was certainly a realist.

    snakes too are realists. Being so close to the ground they sense danger, kinda miles away. In a childishly trusting world, the snakes have been the survivors. the FCO, Savile and snakes are not inncocent.
    the plebs have been.
    giving their life for savile supporting crown and a kiddie fiddling country.

  110. 110
    Simples says:

    They ran out o’ food, m’lard. Ya can’t eat it if it ain’t there to be et, ya bleedin’ eejit ya!

  111. 111
    Mitt Madman says:

    You best beliiiiiieeeeeeve that the rapture’s a-comin’!

  112. 112
    What's up cock! says:

    Does that mean Hague’s anaconda has a Prince Albert…? Just asking.

  113. 113
    ÁC1 says:

    Is that the thing where all the whiteys go to hell? That’s what Obama’s church preaches…

  114. 114
    Stroppycow says:

    Or a Prince Edward perhaps?? Just a thought.

  115. 115
    Derron Brown says:

    My mother shat me out of her arse.

  116. 116
    Tay King-dePisse says:

    “I knew Doris Day before she was a virgin.”
    Michael Caine, before he was a Cockney.

  117. 117
    Stroppycow says:

    G’ weed o – any danger of telling us last weeks caption winner? (usual rules blah blah etc.etc)

  118. 118
    Stroppycow says:

    Is that you Gordon pet???

  119. 119
    Derron Brown says:

    Read my exclusive ‘ How I was beaten by a. genius dwarf and I can’t handle it. Coming soon.

  120. 120
    Stroppycow says:

    Can’t wait (she lied)….

  121. 121
    Derron Brown. I am a genetically fucked tu®. My mother shat me out of her @rse. says:

    I pretend to like snakes.

  122. 122
    Beast says:

    Blair finaly appears before the hague

  123. 123
    Bullying Buggering Cunts BBC says:

    Shaddup and be a peedo apologist by donating to Children In Need!

  124. 124
    Eric Pickles says:

    Did somebody mention pie?

  125. 125
    Gooey Blob says:

    There is no love for Labour views in this country. They will lead the polls, they will win Corby with a big protest vote, and they will win the Euro elections in 2014. They will see this as proof they are on course for government, and fail to make the two changes required at the top of the party.

    Then they will take less seats in 2015 than Brown did in 2010.

  126. 126
    Blowing Whistles says:

    Colleen G – is a very dodgy american with many con nections to the legal Barristers world in london – No 1 pump chambers. She is basically a neo-con doing all that jazz over here in London. Caught her out on BBC R5 some years ago – actually put a question to her but didn’t the dirty little old beeboids ignore it and cut me off. And don’t the Beeb have form at that kind of thing?

  127. 127
    Blowing Whistles says:

    So plod are going after the celebs – good – but one does hope that the main course is of the politicals, legals, city-types and journos who have been at it for 40 years and more – The not so great and good who would have us otherwise believe that they are whiter than white; cleaner than clean ….

  128. 128
    Blowing Whistles says:

    P.S. Anyone read the latest PE report on fatboy Cyril Smith and his antics in Rochdale?

  129. 129
    Blowing Whistles says:

    Poor Malala – she’s got Gordon Brown bandwagonning to her cause.

  130. 130
    Stroppycow says:

    …..if only.

  131. 131
    E says:

    *yawns*

  132. 132
    Kebab Tart says:

    Guido I didnt enter out of a sense of loyalty to my your readership did I Guido ?

    Did I win again sexy ?

    Ta

  133. 133
    I don't need no doctor says:

    And Royals.

  134. 134
    Elf & Afty says:

    No No No in a fire Lard would run out like shit off a shovel.
    So he would live to eat another day.

  135. 135
    David Minibanana says:

    My brother is the biggest snake in politics and I’d pay £ 10,000 to see him stuffed and hanging from the ceiling.

  136. 136
    Lard piggie Pescott says:

    More pies, I’m still hungary.

  137. 137
    Everyone in Chingford says:

    Until a day or two ago we wuld have agreed with you, but now we know for sure who it really is: Boris Johnson.

    http://www.taxpayersalliance.com/grassroots/2012/11/fight-save-walthamstow-dog-stadium.html

  138. 138
    Butt Spotter says:

    Better still shove it up his fag butt.

    Mind you he would love that.

  139. 139
    Anonymous says:

    I like Boris but he’s made several decidedly dodgy planning decisions lately.

  140. 140
    Average taxpayer says:

    1

    Stuffing the creatures of Whitehall is money well spent

    The more they are stuffed, they less they can stuff me

  141. 141
    The Brown Envelope says:

    What is he saving up for?

  142. 142
    Eric Pickles says:

    Mmm So am I.

  143. 143
    Everyone outside Chingford says:

    You’re starting to get really, really boring now.

  144. 144
    A full foot of Male Meat says:

    Hi Mad Frankie’s Older Sister, I will slip you a 12 inch lenth
    for nothing if you spread wide.

  145. 145
    Everyone in Chingford says:

    Boris is a lying c*nt who will never be forgiven. He has given the go-ahead to ruin an iconic local landmark and given reasons for doing so which contain clear falsehoods and flaws: after having, as it now turns out, specifically and repeatedly lied to the local electorate when seeking re-election that he wanted to save it.

  146. 146
    Expat Geordie says:

    Thanks Harlech.

    Bloody good film though. Definitely in my top ten. Pity most of the actors in it have now passed away.

  147. 147
    Mr Nobody says:

    Cameron a clown? You obviously haven’t seen the leader of the opposition…

  148. 148
    Expat Geordie says:

    They won’t win the Euro Elections. UKIP beat them last time, and I suspect that UKIP might come top this time, not by taking Labour votes but as an anti-Tory protest. Still unlikely to win any seats at the General Election though.

  149. 149
    Joss Ayinglike says:

    Order-order mentioned by Douglas Carsmell.

  150. 150
    Mr Nobody says:

    You don’t need 10 grand, Ed will be stuffed at the next election.

  151. 151
    Your Friendly Neighbourhood Snake Charming Service says:

    This supposedly isn’t a “snake,” and it certainly isn’t a “penis.” It’s some sort of strange South American amphibian. “Amphibian,” from the Greek, refers to a creature that lives both on land and in the water. It’s not the only creature that “goes both ways,” however, as we are assured that many in Westminster are of the same predilection.

  152. 152
    nellnewman says:

    Well let’s face it in Labour’s day re-stuffing that snake would have cost us at least £50k.

    I mean our local hospital, fighting to stay afloat after the labour PPI debacle,is paying £250 a time just to change a light bulb.

    Imagine what it would cost under a labour PPI contract to just take the snake down and look at it!?!

  153. 153
    nellnewman says:

    We can but hope. He didn’t look too bouyant at Wednesday’s PMQ’s – more like a flounder out of water.

  154. 154
    Herr Kebab says:

    Diese Umfrage ist momentan nicht verfügbar
    Wir bitten um Ihr Verständnis

  155. 155
    Anonymous says:

    This government is full of snakes – let`s hope it is well and truly stuffed just like Albert.

  156. 156
    Rastus Mohammed O'Goldstein says:

    Boo!

  157. 157
    Anonymous says:

    William would never call me a snake and nor should anyone else. The comments are outrageous.

  158. 158
    Expat Geordie says:

    Got to agree with you on that one. Glitter and Starr have been obvious candidates from the start, even though Glitter’s only conviction in this country was for downloading “inappropriate” images, which he plead gulity to, and there is a belief that the British press set him up in Vietnam. What has screwed this up for the police is Starr going to the press saying that he wants to talk to the police to clear his name and the police ignoring him.

    Personal guess, the police saw this coming and went for the usual suspects, Gary Glitter and, probably, Jonathan King. Freddie Starr cropping up was not something that they expected as he was not one of the usual suspects and has sort of queered the pitch. Gut feeling on verdicts, Glitter – guilty, King – guilty, Starr – not gulity. Only one person has so far been mentioned with Starr, so it is his word against hers and difficult to convict. If there are more cases against him though then all bets are off.

    As for others, as can be seen by the police treatment of Starr, they don’t seem to be taking it too seriously. There will be a few “little people” arrested – some might even go to trial – and the police will mention a few dead people who can’t defend themselves. The truly guilty, if they exist, will probably get away with it.

  159. 159
    Anonymous says:

    Is this Julie Kirkbride speaking?

  160. 160
    Anonymous says:

    Of course darling, whatever you say, you are so simply simply wonedrful.

  161. 161
    Anonymous says:

    Snakes are appropriate symbols of this coalition government.

  162. 162
    Anonymous says:

    Utter nonsense and so typical of the `modernising` lot currently dominating the Tory Party.

  163. 163
    Expat Geordie says:

    Got to agree with you on that one. Glítter and Stárr have been obvious candidates from the start, even though Glítter’s only conviction in this country was for dównlóading “inappropriate” images, which he pléad gulíty to, and there is a belief that the British press set him up in Víetnam. What has scréwed this up for the police is Stárr going to the press saying that he wants to talk to the police to cléar his name and the police ignoring him.

    Personal guess, the police saw this coming and went for the usual suspects, Gáry Glítter and, probably, Jónáthan Kíng. Fréddie Stárr cropping up was not something that they expected as he was not one of the usual suspects and has sort of qúééred the pitch. Gut feeling on verdicts, Glítter – guílty, Kíng – guílty, Stárr – not gulíty. Only one person has so far been mentioned with Stárr, so it is his word against hers and difficult to convict. If there are more cases against him though then all bets are off.

    As for others, as can be seen by the police tréatment of Stárr, they don’t seem to be taking it too seriously. There will be a few “little people” arrested – some might even go to trial – and the police will mention a few déad people who can’t defend themselves. The truly guilty, if they exist, will probably get away with it.

  164. 164
    Harridan Harmanhater says:

    Evening, Ed.

  165. 165
    William says:

    We`ve always liked each other and we both love snakes.

  166. 166
    .......Zzzzzzzzzzzzzz says:

    Where as you where always boring from the start.

  167. 167
    Line the wankers up....three.. two.. one says:

    So freddie Star is at last arrested. Outstanding work by plod. Only took getting on for two weeks from the disclosure by Karen Ward. Just enough time to get shot of his computers. Funny how Charlie Brooks was subjected to a dawn raid to seize his computer to obtain evidence to support a charge of perverting the course of justice. And on his most important annual race day meeting. obviously plod’s masters consider that more pressing than kiddie fiddling. How ingrained is this filth?

  168. 168
    Candlestick says:

    I am not sure how typical it is to stuff snakes in the Tory party. Personaly I think this is highly unusual.

  169. 169
    Handycock (Teen Fondler) says:

    I recognize that creature. Boaz.

  170. 170
    Buffoon Watch says:

    Give the guy a break. It must be hard work having to try and drum up support Boris these days in the face of all his gurning stupidity.

  171. 171
    Anonymous says:

    I’d rattle ‘er.

  172. 172
    nellnewman says:

    Snakes are regarded as guardians of sacred places in some religions.

    That’s more than can be said of hatty harpic who wanted to legalise pa ed op hi lia!

  173. 173
    Expat Geordie says:

    One of the local councils round here got a bit shirty when the coalition got in, even though they are all tory councils at the moment, because the government withdrew the £20 million they had been promised from the building schools for the future fund, or some such bollocks, to upgrade one of the local schools.

    Now £20 million to IMPROVE a school is a bit of a shocker. Now I’ve worked in insurance, and the most that we would ever pay, regardless of the “value” of a property, for a complete rebuild is £500k. As a general rule of thumb the complete rebuild cost of a house is 20% of the market value, the rest is the value of the land.

    If instead of an improvement you do a complete rebuild of a school (which regardless of what teachers say is actually just a big shed with some desks and chairs in it) for £20 million, then the land is worth £80 million. So why not knock the school down and sell off the land, using some of the money to move the “school” into empty office space, there’s plenty of that about. Then the rest of the money can be spent reducing debt and providing other “services”.

    Or is it that the £20 million is not really going on improvements but is lining a government approved supplier/contractors pockets?

  174. 174
    Starred says:

    The news is saying comedian Freddie Starr has been arrested by police. Absolutely disgusting. I’m sickened by this. He’s not a fucking comedian.

  175. 175
    nellnewman says:

    http://www.thetimes.co.uk/tto/news/medianews/article3581584.ece

    suspect the po lice are worried that their savile FridayMorningClub is going to have to be investigated too.

  176. 176
  177. 177
  178. 178
    Sherlock says:

    That certainly needs looking into.

  179. 179
    nellnewman says:

    I wonder who will be next? It’ll be someone else associated with the dodgy beeb of course.

    When is a UK Government going to get to grips with this flawed state broadcaster that we don’t need?!!

    And I think the beeb should be banned from allowing any children anywhere near its premises or its programmes forthwith.

  180. 180
    Anonymous says:

    I’m surprised the MSM haven’t been knocking on a well known presenter’s door asking him about the underage boys he procures to satisfy his carnal lust during his overseas trips.

  181. 181
    Candlestick says:

    I fail to understand why anyone would pay to watch Freddie Starr.

  182. 182
    nellnewman says:

    It does but there seems to be a wall of silence from the po lice about it at the moment. The dam will burst eventually! With a bit of luck Guido might pick up on it!!

  183. 183
    Saffron says:

    Fred Starr is only the tip of the iceberg along with Sa-Viles other contemporaries.
    I sincerely hope that these investigations will go absolutely to the top.
    Their are high fliers involved in these child abuse allegations and there has been and continues to be an effort to hide this.
    Various elements of high fliers have and are still involved in trying to cover this up.
    These people to me are the lowest of the low and should be exposed as to what their morals are.
    Any country in my eyes who cannot protect their most vulnerable ie: childeren are a shite country.

  184. 184
    Line the wankers up....three.. two.. one says:

    What were senior plod doing at this club? Certainly not fucking watching Seasame St. Or maybe they were indulging in their own kiddie show. Senior Police/Mps/Judges were all at it and lets face it they are untouchable. No way is this going to be allowed to be investigated properly as there is nobody willing or able to to the job without getting ‘Kellied’.

  185. 185
  186. 186
    Cath says:

    OT – just been to a debate for the Hampshire and Isle of Wight Police & Crime Commisioner. Interesting that the labour candidate, Jacqui Rayment’s second priority (after cutting crime) is to work with UNISON and the Police Federation reps on staff morale. Interesting. I wonder if Jacqui is receiving the UNISON shilling? How does one find out?

    Yeah, just what I need Jacqui to sort out the increased crime in my area – more f’ing pilgrims!

  187. 187
    otis says:

    ‘ sitting in the dock in the hague’

  188. 188
    Call me ‘Dave’ says:

    Good Evening!

    Tomorrow, I wish to be known as

    The Slippery Snakehead Shit who doesn’t know his VichyArse from his Quisling Elbow.

    Thank you.

  189. 189
    No - seriously says:

    they wanna wank? – let’s give em Hatty in heat

  190. 190
    They are all bastyards! says:

    Bastyards – the lot of the loathsome Bullingdon Oxford trip – and I’m sorry to say that – I once had great respect for Oxford – as a place of learning – now it’s but a nest of tossers – especially the fucker in No 10.

  191. 191
    Sparkler says:

    I don’t think many people have for a long time, clip from An Audience With I think, an audience full of the usual suspects.

  192. 192
    nellnewman says:

    So is hatty harpic going to tell us why she wanted to legalise pa edo phil ia?

    Was it because she had links to labour folks at the beeb who were offending and she was trying to protect them?!

  193. 193
    SOME! says:

    some – but the majority of English tossers wouldn’t understand -0 esp a womin like Harpic the vile pair of vaginal lips on legs!

  194. 194
    Anonymous says:

    Repetition. Five point penalty.

  195. 195
    nellnewman says:

    Probably twatson who has been desperately trying to turn attention away from Labour’s appalling record supporting pa edo phili a and support of the dodgy practices of the beeb this last week.

    As always twatson, instead of turning attention away, has put a spotlight on it.

  196. 196
    Sparkler says:

    Shagging an ugly cow is still illegal isn’t it?.

  197. 197
    nellnewman says:

    That doesn’t answer the question mr twatson does it?!

    Why do labour and hatty harpic want to legalise pa ed o philia?

  198. 198
    nellnewman says:

    why did bliar put a dnotice on scottish robertson,brown activities related to children ?

  199. 199
    Mili threat says:

    Having watched QT. Have to say well done to the Unions for electing Mili Junior as Labour leader as Mili senior is dangerous, dangerous to this country.

  200. 200
    johnwardmedway says:

    I’d not be surprised to discover that Albert had a female mate, perhaps named Anna Conda-leeza Rice…

  201. 201
    nellnewman says:

    albert’s female mate is undoubtedly harrietharman !

    hatty has become the political face of pa edo phi lia especially for labour.

    Labour must now explain why they wahted to support such a foul cause!

  202. 202
    Diane Fatbott says:

    Any peas with that Condoleeza rice ?

  203. 203
    Red Ed's non-predator union bosses says:

    Miliband major was groomed by T.B£iar. Ed Millionaireband, on the other hand, follows our instructions.

  204. 204
    Hawkeye says:

    Is Tessa Jowell for real? What a blithering idiot!

  205. 205
    Another Engineer says:

    Only the PPEists.

    Oh, and Wadham College.

  206. 206
    Chef says:

    If you are still hungary, there’s more turkey on the table.

  207. 207
    albacore says:

    Poor old Albert, why’s everyone picking on him?
    He’s been dead even longer than pop-picker Jim
    To clean up his image he needs just re-stuffing
    What about all those live snakes that need handcuffing?
    Just for a second, doff those rose-tinted glasses
    Don’t you reckon that, more with each day that passes
    The only real business of our stuffed Parliament
    Is preaching bullshit (when it ain’t sowing dissent)

  208. 208
    Chef says:

    Sparkler, not sure about cows, but I understand muffin the mule is still off the menu.

  209. 209
    Anonymous says:

    the emotionally needy children have not been given boundaries by their mothers, no wonder they get drawn to those who are all about me,me,me. Then the me,me,me, folks get into bed with other me,me,me folk and get protected.

    give yourself boundaries.

  210. 210
    Anonymous says:

    oh dear.
    we are shite,
    whose fault was it to be innocently trusting.
    atleast
    our eyes wide open now.
    we have the power to make a change.
    in a grounded country like ours, we have to see the scale of the problem first.
    then mission impossible may become
    mission
    possible.

    only then will the lazy but great plebs of this shite country move. until then.
    work on yourself,
    in order to
    make
    a better you
    a more robust
    you. there is hope, there always is.

  211. 211
    Anonymous says:

    the AB.solute USERS.
    hide. sometimes in broad daylight.
    they do not like sunlight though. Until we see them,
    we incur a loss.

  212. 212
    Anonymous says:

    beeb should be banned.
    they are a danger to the unprotected.

  213. 213
    'Today' is bollocks says:

    Cheating isn’t cheating, it’s being ‘optimistic’., teach that to your kids.

    England may suffer floods, following earlier warnings of drought. Reason? More extreme weather due to climate change. BTW, you have to take on board England has never suffered from flooding in it’s entire recorded history…….durrr.

    Latest, Orwell is kack.

  214. 214
    Archer Karcher says:

    I have and believe it or not, he is even worse than Call Me Useless.

  215. 215
    Mr Starr says:

    Jimmy Savile is to be the new face of Brylcream. A spokesman for the company said ‘jimmy is highly regarded as one of the best male groomers in the UK’

  216. 216
    smoggie says:

    Is is true what they say Miss Diane, that black mambas are bigger than yellow ones?

  217. 217
    Anonymous says:

    Misleading that headline, it implies that Hague owns it and got taxpayers to pay to restore it. He doesn’t own it.

  218. 218
    Lou Scannon says:

    Serious question :
    What is the correct form of address when writing to Harriet Hatesmen ?

  219. 219
    Anonymous says:

    Its called Denis McShane by the way. The biggest lying snake of them all.


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Boris on British Jihadis. Apparently based on MI5 intel:

“If you look at all the psychological profiling about bombers, they typically will look at porn. They are literally w***ers. Severe onanists. They are tortured. They will be very badly adjusted in their relations with women, and that is a symptom of their feeling of being failures and that the world is against them. They are not making it with girls, and so they turn to other forms of spiritual comfort — which of course is no comfort.”


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