October 24th, 2012

Speaker Jerk-ow

Who’d have thought John Bercow would want to add to his reputation as a stupid and sanctimonious dwarf? The pint-sized Speaker has fulfilled at least two of these three criteria by parking his bright red £30,000 Land Rover Freelander, complete with self-titled personalised numberplate, outside his parliamentary apartment for all to see. Bercow’s latest vanity project will have set him back anything between a few hundred quid and several thousand. His wife’s other car is a Volvo…


  1. 1
    Kebab Time says:

    ” His wife’s other car is a Volvo…”

    Brought in solidarity with “Operation Volvo” ? ;)

  2. 2
    What a plonker. says:

    You could not make it up.

  3. 3
    Steve says:

    And it isn’t even parked properly – what a ****

  4. 5
    Kit says:

    Not very well parked!

  5. 6
    bill wagstick says:

    Freelander for a Freeloader

  6. 11
    Sage says:

    Vanity, pure vanity. The poor little guy has a big problem – and it’s not just the foremost slapper of the UK, Sally.

    • 39
      Glyn H says:

      One might recall that the judge in the Jeremy Thorpe trial said to one of the accused that he was “one of those jumped up people who had their initials on their number plate”

    • 102
      My Piggy Bank is empty says:

      One day he is going to bump into a smaller guy, and give a mouthful. Little pleb will hopefully punch twats lights out.

    • 390
      Halibut Hall says:

      “BIG” isn’t a word that comes to mind when describing this small minded toad!

  7. 12
    JohnW says:

    This is not a proper personalised plate but the cheap option the plebs take!

  8. 13
    TheE17Tory says:

    his wife’s other car is a vulva

  9. 14
    dog says:

    Typical he tries to ban the address of landlords being published on the grounds of security and then buys a big red car with his name on it.

    • 118
      My Piggy Bank is empty says:

      Well if the twat gets himself topped we will only get another wanker out of Dave’s phone book to replace him.

  10. 16
    ancientpopeye says:

    Presumably us stupid taxpayers paid for this grandiose deluded height challenged Speaker’s RangeRover?

  11. 18
    jgm2 says:

    As an example of mid-life crisis it could be a lot worse. He could have bought a Porsche Boxter.

    • 34

      I suppose its lucky he didn’t order a Harley Davidson and a leather jacket.

      • 47

        A Brough Superior would have been out of his class.

        • 85
          Rotherham Person says:

          Don’t know about that have seen a 1800cc HD, the racket it makes on startup, a bit like an old type Norton with no silencer

          • I used to do business with the company in the 80s at Haydn Road in Nottingham. The motorcycles had long gone but they then sold cars.

            The guy who used to run it was Colin Ball. He was far to nice and honest a man to be in the motor trade IMHO.

            Since they cease production of bikes in 1940, I would suggest that anything surviving is a bleeding miracle in terms of modern production!

            The crap that comes out of China falls to bits after 4 years or less (built-in-obsolescence if you ask me.) q.v. Geely manufactured parts recall for the TX4 taxi which led to Manganese Bronze receivership this week.

      • 65
        Mouse on a House says:

        Can you buy miniturised Harley’s?

      • 276
        freddie fraud steer says:

        No point in a Harley ……twinkle toes feet wouldn’t reach he ground

    • 123
      My Piggy Bank is empty says:

      I would prefer to see him in a coffin with the lid nailed down and six foot of earth on top.

  12. 19

    That’s what I thought I felt.

  13. 20
    Bercow is toast says:

    My wife plate is H 15 COW

  14. 22
    tony m says:

    Someone else must already have 1C UNT

  15. 24
    JohnRS says:

    I presume AR5E was already taken?

  16. 25
  17. 27
    Anonymous says:

    Are we sure its not a Dinky Toy?

  18. 29
    DVLA says:

    That says 13 definitely not by any stretch of a warped imagination an E!

  19. 33
    The HoC says:

    We’re all laughing at him.

  20. 35
    Dyson - Always Looking For New Contraptions That Don't Work says:

    Is that little contraption on the pavement a “leg up” thingy so that he can actually get in rather than just admiring from the outside,what he has fleeced us for.

  21. 36
    • 143
      Jethro says:

      I see the BBC/Stoke Mandeville says, about the Necrophilia claims, ‘We have no evidence…’ They expect dead people to rise up and say ‘He abused me?’

  22. 37
    Tuscan Tony says:

    We should have a whipround and buy him B311 END

  23. 41
    thequiche says:

    His other car has a personalised number plate too…


  24. 42
    MacGuffin says:

    Ummmm. who cares if someone has a personalised numberplate?

    Your obsession with Bercow is a bit disturbing, don’t you think?

    • 71
      UKIP.i.am says:

      Are you so dim you don’t see the security implications here?

      • 91
        Rotherham Person says:

        Ask the man on the Clapped out omibus who Bercow is would scratch his head and say “Who”

      • 204
        To Be Fair says:

        To be fair I think the Bercows have to be commended for their security, for example any potential blackmail attempts by threatning to make public any disgusting compromising photos of them have been cleverly pre empted by Sally already putting them out into the public arena. Quite brilliant really.

      • 209
        MacGuffin says:

        If Bercow doesn’t care about his security, why should we?

        • 227
          UKIP.i.am says:

          I don’t care a monkeys but if he really doesn’t care about his own security (which he should do in his position) how can anybody believe he believes in the security of rent-fiddlers, which he has used as an excuse not to reveal their details?

  25. 45
    Jen The Blue says:

    This is a real tricky one……..who is the most biased disgrace ever to sit in the speaker’s chair.

    Bercow or Martin? I wouldn’t like to choose.

  26. 46
    Anonymous says:

    My money was on Hague but obviously i was on a loser.

  27. 48
    Aangirfan says:

    Former child star Ben Fellows writes about his time as a child actor:

    “The first politician whom I met was … Sir Michael Grylls, who invited me to tea in the House of Commons ‘tea room’ and spent the meeting attempting make untoward body contact with me under the table.

    “After that, I was sent to a political lobbyist named Ian Greer who tried to rub his genitalia against me while he hugged me.

  28. 49
  29. 57
    Spode says:

    A BBC presenter in his spare time, no less, of jazz or somesuch primitive noise.

  30. 67
    Use by 22 Oct says:


    Look at meee, I’m wearing the first Poppy of the season

    • 81
      Lord of The Old Lags & Krug Archer says:

      He may be quicker but no one and I mean no one has a bigger poppy than me! …and I always dangle it from my balcony.

  31. 69
    Tommy Bennet says:

    Another waste of space low life Lord..

    Must be pulling in £1 million a year with pensions and jobsworths post. Love to see him dangling on some telegraph pole.

    • 95
      Oh , what shall I be today to escape the PC police? says:

      What a dumb comment (not yours), Is he about to volunteer for unpaid community work?.

      • 243
        Pundit Too says:

        Lord Bichard retired at 54 from the public sector and then “chaired” quango type reviews. Just another waste of space in the House of Lords then.
        His next idea is to put all the old men in the forces and send them off to fight wars – oh it has already been recommended – probably by one of his ancestors.

    • 161
      not a machine reloaded says:

      The pensions debate has lost its way since Labour destroyed manufacturing . I am always saddened and astonished that some in a office can pronounce that , your not that slighty more ready for retirement , when you have a lifetime of working in all conditions doing manual work . next time Willets et al comes out with another myopic view of how many people earn a living , give hime 20 tonne of pea gravel , a shovel , a wheel barrow and get him to shift it all in the rain , 100yrds up a gently sloping field , in winter , see how he feels about retiring at 65 whens he had a bellyfull of that realism …

  32. 73
    Anonymous says:

    i commented on this days ago – please keep up!

    now, the leveson charade involves the major institutions of our nation – politicians, the police and the media – in what way is the jimmy sav-ile case different? here again we have politicians, the police and the media. Who knows what and when and how? There’s no wonder so much has been hidden for so long and js appears to have got away with it – how else indeed? How much more do the institutions hide from us and in what way should they ever be trusted with anything?

    • 144
      not a machine reloaded says:

      Since there were more than two people on earth , who communicated to one another , you have perhaps never been able to fully trust any state . They rise and fall , that is why history can be such a valuable tutor . The fall of Labour or new Labour told us a great deal about what the state had become and its origins distorted .
      The civil society was based around the people putting some of there affairs into institutions that would always do what was best to keep certain values , the values that could be improved by having these institutions . They were never meant to replace the uptake of common values based around Christianity and its developement of charcture .

      The trouble with big instutions is even a small component failure can have consequence if they control the individual . Phone hacking is a useful example , of how Labours eutopia actually worked , the senasationalism only procured the need for more state control hysteria , old communist trick . A man in North Korea has been exicuted for drinking during the Kim Il Jongs 100 day mourning , so perhaps were not too hard done by , I would have been the man having a drunken jig on the steps of congress and an imovable smile , if my charcture was allowed in North Korea . Wonder what grommit thinks of that one

  33. 78
    MB. says:

    The Mail says his wife’s car is S88 LYY

  34. 84
    Backwoodsman says:

    It could be worse – he’d look bloody silly on a Harley with stabiliser wheels on the back.

  35. 90
    Diane Fatbutt says:

    SHT A55

  36. 97
    fnar fnar says:

    Our Sally, does she have a Midget Owners’ Club badge?

  37. 106
    Baron Hogwash says:

    Sally could only get the number plate S1LY K0W

  38. 106
    not a machine reloaded says:

    Rather troubling isnt it Mr Goves analysis of what is turning up at primary schools , but then I was perhaps trying to tell you that one of the consequences of what Labour culturally did , would be exactly that .They can press buttons , but not do numbers or assemble words . Just to think we now have a whole generation of parents who have been sold electronic nanny state , and they dont even comprehend why it may all be some big damaging sell by the irresponsible corporate socialists .

    Still not a machine , has had major drubbing for daring to speak of such things , and now it dawns on even our best minds … Remind the bishop when you next see him , labour were wrong .

    • 124
      pink tourmaline says:

      Interesting. YoungNells just starting GCSE’s . Her school has decided all GCSE students should have IPAD2′s on which to do their course work.

      They’ve had a whole half term with them and all the kids are doing with them is playing games . The teachers have still not worked out how to use these things in lessons or for education.

      What a laugh! For my money you can’t beat a proper teacher in a classroom teaching kids with text books and getting them use pen and paper to work things out.!!!

      • 137
        ÁC1 says:

        Even better would be a teacher who lets children LEARN. You cannot push knowledge in.

        • 191
          Jethro says:

          138 Rubbish, balderdash, twaddle, and unconsidered tripe! For most of what we know of human society, LEARNING has meant exactly that: LEARNING what other generations have found out (some, perhaps dying in the process) – red stuff can hurt you; not a good idea to stand down-wind of a fire – but a good idea to stand down-wind of an animal you need to catch; not a good idea to build your house a. on sand, b. close to a cliff, c. on low-ground that might be flooded; if the snow is yellow, don’t scoop it up and melt for drinking; having sex with your nearest might seem attractive, but it’s not good for the race, so dare to look further afield; taking other people’s things might seem a quick and easy way to getting things – but… if they feel equally free to come and take your things, you’re no better off; telling lies is easy, but if everyone tells lies, a society cannot function…
          Besides, all this rot about ‘letting a child Learn’ in practice means elaborate schemes aimed at deceiving the child into thinking he found it all out by himself when, in reality, huge effort and immense thought has been expended by the teacher so that the child can be made to feel that he has unaidedly discovered something… why not ‘cut out the middle-man’ and let these little geniuses ‘just do it!’?
          By the way, please don’t ever tell me that little Johnny ‘has low self-esteem’: the Pharaohs had lower ‘self-esteem’ than ‘students’ now – Henry the VIIIth. obviously suffered from it, as must have Josef Stalin and Adolf Hitler, to say nothing of Genghis Khan and Vlad the Impaler (guess what? They were all, obviously, ‘taught by rote’, not one of them allowed to discover, to LEARN…

          • Over simplistic IMVHO.

            1. A good teacher inspires.

            2. The effect on a child is that he/she is motivated to learn more.

            3. As Wittgenstein said, you need a ladder to get there but when you have you can throw it away. (We don’t need to reinvent the wheel every time we want to use one.)

            4. After that, and with a solid grounding, the maturer individual can question and even reject what he/she has been taught.

            5. His/her experience may be improved/downgraded by such departure from the norm (Darwinism).

            6. Sometimes, one can vary from normative positions and be right but you can still be rejected by your environment (Galileo).

            7. What is regarded as right today is so often regarded as wrong tomorrow. That will probably be reversed in the future – more than once.

            8. Anyone who thinks they have arrived on the academic bus has a rude shock awaiting them. They have only just begun. One must learn every day of your life. The only excuse is death and then it has to be your own.

            9. If I carry on like this there will be a thousand points and I will run out of space. But you might get the picture of what I am saying.

      • 155
        not a machine reloaded says:

        I perhaps didnt get it across , I was more concerned at what is happening to parents /children relationship , ie parental abilities in a cyber society .If the children are mimicking the parents , as i see it were degenerating in our responsibilities and there effectiveness due to a third way imposter .

        • 160
          pink tourmaline says:

          Well you are right about that ‘not a machine’ parenting skills took a mega dive under the last 13 years of labour – ‘not my job to bring up little johnny it’s up to the state’ is the mentality labour promoted!!

          • not a machine reloaded says:

            When you have a go at as a topic , you want to see all the nameless vested interests that come after you ….

          • pink tourmaline says:

            Yep I’m sure that’s true and some of the named one’s as well.

            I can imagine that hattyharpic and bullyballs would be fair annoyed at you trying to insist that parents should take responsibility for providing good quality parenting to their children!!

            After all they don’t want well educated children that will turn into aspirational adults in the future. They’re not the sort of people who are going to vote for labour 2015 and beyond!!

    • 140

      There is a repeat of when pocket calculators first came out in the 1980s. People started to think you didn’t need to know maths.

      But those who had a good mathematical grasp would check that their answers were roughly correct mentally. Those that did not have that ability could never tell whether or not they had mis-keyed.

      One needs to have the mental abilities *and* the IT skills to be really efficient. The wrong results can be disastrous.

      • 166
        pink tourmaline says:

        Too true. YoungNells came through Infants and Juniors during labour’s disastrous 13 years in government.

        Teaching things like times tables, spelling and grammar were all but outlawed during those years!!

        No wonder kids can’t string a sentence together nowadays or add up a simple column of figures or do multiplication.

        I taught YoungNells myself how to do those things and was regarded by her school as a maverick who would damage the child by being pushy!! Nowadays she’s ahead of her Maths Class only because we taught her proper basics in her early years!!!

        • 180

          You are a good parent to do that – but you will regard it as normal which is how I would also regard it. The school are evil by comparison. Levelling down.

          • pink tourmaline says:

            She’s in an Academy now doing GCSE’s and doing well. Great school – although the IPAD2′s are not a good development!!

            Gove has made vast improvements to education in last couple of years. Hopefully he has also improved education at the Junior level where that early education really matters!

            bullyballs did so much damage to the Education system during 13 years of labour. It was criminal!!! But then of course labour did so much damage to every other aspect of life and government during their term.

            I think the last labour government were probably the worst, most criminal government, the UK has ever had!!

          • You can delete the word probably and it will still be true.

      • 232
        Another Engineer says:

        When I was a student, we were asked to work out the rough numeric answer to some hideous calculations involving various irrational numbers (such as square roots, cube roots pi, e etc etc) without recourse to the electronic crutch.

        Never believe the answer from a computer without first checking that it makes sense.

        Mind you, most mathematicians are hopeless at arithmetic.

        • 253
          Pundit Too says:

          It appears that some companies are asking job applicants for a written letter so that they can evaluate the handwriting and the writer’s character by an expert. Even my own handwriting has gone downhill over the last 10 years and I write every day.
          Their letters could prove to be too illegible to be deciphered and as bad or worse than Mad Gordon Brown’s.
          However it could spawn a new UK industry of kerbside letter writers as in India and China.

          • Reg Plate says:

            Illegibilty is and always has been a sine qua non of being a doctor. Or a senior civil servant.

    • 270
      pink tourmaline says:

      And this point especially is The Most important and should inform our learning for life!!!

      8. Anyone who thinks they have arrived on the academic bus has a rude shock awaiting them. They have only just begun. One must learn every day of your life. The only excuse is death and then it has to be your own.

      • 385
        crusty git says:

        aged ten, i had a reading age far in advance of that which was expected of me. result? i was put into a remedial class for pupils who were either subnormal or didn’t speak english. that is what happens in a progressive county. should i sue?

  39. 115

    Sоmеоnе іn thе lаst fеw dаys mеntіоnеd Dеnnіs Pооrе, оnе tіmе оwnеr оf Mаngаnеsе Brоnzе, thе іll-stаrrеd tаxі mаnufаcturеrs whо wеnt іntо rеcеіvеrshіp thіs wееk.

    Hе fаncіеd hіmsеlf аs а F1 drіvеr but nеvеr wоn а sіnglе tіtlе, thus еаrnіng hіmsеlf thе sоubrіquеt оf Pіss Pооrе

  40. 116
    pink tourmaline says:

    Very odd all my comments are being blocked.

    I’m not known for being extreme or using bad language. What am I doing wrong?

  41. 117
    Other personalised plates says:

    Harriet Harman:
    S1LY B1NT

    John Prescott:
    B1G 5L0B

    Chuka Umunna:
    5MUG PR1K

  42. 121
    Gordon Brown says:

    THR0 N0K1A

  43. 133
    Anonymous says:

    This is what a got rich quick pretender shamelessly dangles in the face of hard working families, but history will record you as a nothing more than a short arsed nonentity. the number plate hubris is sickening.

  44. 138
    I don't need no doctor says:

    Bercow’s number plate reads B13 RCO and not BERCOW. It’s nothing like BERCOW, so what twat would pay for a number plate like that? Bercow would!

    • 189
      Anonymous says:

      Was it a pressie from his wife?

    • 210
      Bluto says:

      It’s quite something, isn’t it. The pea-sized mentality that would think a sequentially generated registration number like “B one three Arseo” would have any clever relevance to the surname Bercow. If it says anything it is something cringingly embarrassing about the mental state of the person who would actually pay money for it.

      But then look at his coat of arms.

  45. 150
    Hypocrisy says:

    BithreeRCo? Nope never heard of them?

  46. 153
    My Piggy Bank is empty says:

    He would be better off with RUN1 T

    • 190
      BBC Necrophilia Pedo Ring says:

      Indeed, or maybe the short and simple ‘TW4T’ plate would suffice for the little shit.

      • 198
        Jethro says:

        192 I’ve got a cracking 5H1t you’ld like, milord! To you, only 5 Grand – but I can make the paper say 7, if that’d help, y’r Grace!

  47. 162
    Tom Fatson says:

    LAR D855

  48. 168
    Andrew says:

    So he’s a twat, what’s it matter to you or me what twats spend their money on?

    Don’t be such a bloody miserabilist Puritan.

    • 174
      not a machine reloaded says:

      Thats the trouble , its always that they want more of our taxes , to spend as their money , thats so in yer face

    • 203
      I hate Parliament so much it hurts says:

      “what’s it matter to you or me what twats spend their money on?”

      Except their money comes from our wages. It’s our money.

      That car is your wages. That number plate is my wages. Stolen by the scum in Parliament, and given to Bercow.

      And he spent it on a 4WD vehicle (in London). How practical. And he leaves it sitting there.

      “Ha ha ha!,” cries Bercow. “This car used to be your wages! Ha ha ha ha! Look what I spent your money on! Tee-hee-hee!”

      • 218
        Robespierre and Danton says:

        We have an amusing way of dealing with such people.

      • 284
        Andrew says:


        Once anyone gets paid their pay it’s their money. That line of thinking turns all earners into serfs.

        Some years ago Bernard Manning played a certain seaside town whose council were against him, and they tried every which way they could to keep him out. It’s a worrying thought that nowadays they could threaten the theatre’s licence for their bar.

        One line was to announce that any employee of the council who went to see him would be sacked. “The people of this borough do not want their money spent on supporting this man’s act”, etc., etc. Some councils would rather their employee-serfs did not join the other political party, buy imported cars, take foreign holidays (“They should spend it where they earned it”) or whatever it may be.

        That car is Bercow’s wages. If you are private-sector your pay is your wages, not your employer’s wages. Tell me Bercow is all the things he is, tell me the Speaker is overpaid, those are other issues. But there’s a serious point here about personal freedom and autonomy, and you don’t sacrifice it because you are eployed by anybody, including the public.

  49. 183
    pink tourmaline says:

    hmmm I hope he’s not one of those rent swappers troughing money at our expense so that he can buy himself fancy cars!!!

  50. 195
    Anonymous says:

    DW4 RF and SL4 PPA

  51. 197
    All of the UK says says:

    What a jumped up prize big B E R K this fcuking T W A T is…….

    where do they find these prize fcuking pil*locks ? The B E R K is intent on

    destroying the image of this Great Office of State by immature yobbish

    behaviour……he’s not even fit to be an MP…….

    GUIDO hope you have your ear close to the ground & find out how much

    was paid for this childish vanity & more importantly by WHOM !!………..

    • 208
      pink tourmaline says:

      Big question is why is the tory party in Buckingham still supporting this idiot?? Why aren’t they looking for a more normal , suitable and enthusiastic tory candidate??!!

  52. 201

    The prime minister’s announcement that “prisoners are not getting the vote under this government” is profoundly depressing. Graun

    Rozenberg is simply wrong on this one. Maybe he has been been mugged by reality?

    • 207
      I hate Parliament so much it hurts says:

      I wonder, will anyone at the Graun, staring ban/kru/ptcy in the face, read the line “The prime minister’s announcement that “prisoners are not getting the vote under this government” is profoundly depressing” and make the connection between that line and the paper’s impending bank/rup/tcy?

      (is there any particular reason why “ban/kru/ptcy” is verboten?)

      • 212

        Para 1. Exactly!

        Para 2. I would rather not say but a Wiki check will soon reveal what I consider to be a needless embarrassment. The boy done good.

        • 220
          I hate Parliament so much it hurts says:

          Ah-ha! I see. I agree. As the old saying goes, “the only man who never made a mistake is the man who never did anything.”

          • Anonymous says:

            That is the point exactly. We should not attack anyone for a failure or a mistake, but should throw them to the wolves for cover ups and deception.

            The person that never made a mistake never learnt any lessons.

            To cover up issues and ignore whistle-blowers is not a mistake it is a lack of courage. For them to continue with the cover up even after catastrophic results is a crime. (I am not referring to the BBC)

  53. 205

    The UK cut greenhouse gas emissions by more than any other European country last year, over-achieving on targets under the Kyoto protocol on climate change


    For fuck’s sake why?

    It is costing the UK citizens billions. No other country is going this far. The science is discredited.


    • 211
      I hate Parliament so much it hurts says:

      I’m not sure, but I suspect the answer may lie in the fact Cameron’s multimillionaire father in law gets nearly £1,000 every day (tax free) as a reward for having a windmill on his estate.

      • 214
        Anonymous says:

        Has anyone heard of at least one MP who is an AGW sceptic, or are they all as thick as shit?

        • 217
          I hate Parliament so much it hurts says:

          I suspect most of them are AGW sceptics, but it’s such a terrific excuse to impose additional taxation on us (and they can scream “Denier! Denier! AGW denier!” at anyone who objects – just like they scream “Racist!” at anyone who complains about immigration).

          And then they can take some of that ‘green’ tax, and hand it out to themselves. Such as the £300,000 Cameron’s father-in-law gets every year because he’s got a windmill.

        • 219
          Engineer says:

          Recent DEFRA appointee Owen Patterson is decidedly sceptic, and has already criticised the policy of subsidising wind power. The suspicion is that some at the top of government know that the climate change panic is a load of bullocks, but haven’t the balls to say so openly yet. There may be ‘issues’ with some of the LibDems, notably Ed Davey.

        • 224
          Anonymous says:

          Our MP could not even understand the concept of equal vs. an unequal fight.

          They only consider themselves. There is nothing else.

        • 259
          Denier Die Die Die. The witch finder says:

          Quite a few are but they dare not say so as the zealots of the religion of man made global warming will burn them at the political stake.

        • 370
          blub says:

          At least for the time being the BBC are the most trusted arbiters of what’s true and what isn’t and as they’ve been pushing the global warming hoax for 16 years (along with the schools) so there’s still a majority(?) who believe it. Only the BBC can burst that bubble and they won’t admit that global warming stopped 16 years ago despite even the Met office surrendering.

          Maybe an MP can ask in PMQs about the Met Office’s surrender – see if they can force it on the BBC by stealth?

        • 388
          Tiger Tiger says:

          Truth is alien to politics. Only personal advantage counts. Many politicians, however, are so thick they believe all the nonsense they’ve been spoon-fed by the media and the education system. An ability to think independently is a crippling disadvantage in politics.

    • 213
      the heart of darkness says:

      Maybe the BBC could help you with this one?

    • 221
      tick tock tick tock says:

      You’ve already written why, MONEY , these politician’s are hell bent in making themselves rich and the rest of the people of the country poor, until the brain-dead realise which the way things are going and start to screw these b,stards then we have no chance, we can explain, shout and moan but politician’s couldn’t give a toss.

      • 371
        blub says:

        They’ll always be one or two who manage to wriggle their way through the party selection process designed to filter out anyone who isn’t morally bankelrupt.

        And on top of that there’ll be morally bankelrupt ones who want to throw a stink bomb for their own personal reasons.

  54. 216
    This Fat'un says:

    I am amazed at how quickly the BBC has put its house in order and learned its lessons. Everything is now absolutely hunky-dory and tomorrow I shall be having an extra long lunch to celebrate the fact.

  55. 230
    Twitter ye not says:
    • 238
      I don't need no doctor says:

      What about an enquiry into your antics being a disgrace to our parliament. Don’t you realise that people laugh at you behind your back. You really are stupid.

    • 255
      Use by 22 Oct says:

      Sally …more come backs than Frank Sinatra

    • 302
      nellnewman says:

      Hmmm suspect labour need to be a but careful about calling for Inquiry into high profile figures who abuse children!!

      • 314
        A Shave like a baby's bum says:

        Nell I had a look in Tesco this evening for those disposable safety razors. They do a few own brands and not all were in stock, which exactly are the one’s your husband recommends?

        Probably the ones that weren’t in stock.

        I’m tempted to try a cut throat razor but in the wrong hands or in a rush they can be lethal so I’ve always given that a wide berth. I’ve been into barber shops all round the world in what many would regard as not the safest of places to be and the most frightening experience has been when the barber gets the hot towels out and hones his razor on the leather strap before taking a blade sharper than a surgeon’s scalpel to one’s throat. Only to be greatly relieved to walk out alive with the smoothest and closest shave possible.

  56. 235
    I don't need no doctor says:

    Just what is Fatboy Watson up to? Just what is his agenda, maybe revenge for his BBC buddies.
    It could be that all of the media organisations have dirt on so many people, such as royalty, top business people, politicians, those in the entertainment field.
    Let battle comence Watson, but don’t be surprised when it comes back to bite you.

    • 250
      Use by 22 Oct says:

      What would he have done if Bercow hadn’t called him?

    • 260
      Tay King-dePisse says:

      He’s just crazy enough not to care. He’ll take everyone with him when he goes, of that you can be sure. And yeah, they all DO have dirt on everybody. Wouldn’t be “journalism” if you didn’t dig up a few mouldering corpses now and again– it’s what you do with them that’s the issue.

    • 305
      nellnewman says:

      twatson is a bit of an idiot.

      He thinks he can burn the opposition with allegations of child abuse but he forgets that labour have even more child abusers in their ranks that they have protected!!!

      He also thinks the public are idiots that don’t know about these things. He’s going to get a rude awakening!!

      • 382
        Anonymous says:

        I hope so, he is an embarassment. We seem to have a high percentage of weirdos in politics, mostly on labours side. I mean look at Ed.

  57. 236
    Jimmy says:

    Can we request registration numbers for other politicians? Most media are spoilsports and blur them.

  58. 239
    UKIP.i.am says:

    Bercow got the car for a power trip.

    • 286
      nellnewman says:

      I suspect bercow bought that car and numberplate as a ‘finger up’ to the electorate!!

      I don’t much use bad language but seems to me that he’s saying ‘Sod you’!! to the electorate .

      Or in other words – look how much money I can get out of the system whilst you are struggling to pay your energy bills – Losers !!!!

  59. 245
    45KIN says:

    Is it possible to develop ones sphincter in order to poo a Toblerone?

    • 248
      BBC Necrophilia Pedo Ring says:

      You’d have to ask Gordo about that sort of elaboration.

      • 249
        45KIN says:

        Eric Hobswain was a right twat

        • 283

          He’s my hero !

        • 289
          nellnewman says:

          EricHobsbawn believed that if 20million people had died a horrible death (which they did in Russia); and it had resulted in bringing communist control to the world – it would have been worth their deaths!!

          This man was pure evil and militwit worships him!!!

          • not a machine reloaded says:

            mmm Eric Hobsbawn , strange to think that as someone whos thinking might be on the right , I found his history books very readable. He observed some moments in history with details that still put him with the great intellectuals .
            His interviews were so rare , that it was immpossible to assess ,what his thoughts about the current trajectorys were . The post Christieve era seemed to trouble him , but he thought it was a blip .Being such an intellectual he no doubt thought communism was going to win and after a few more revolutions , become that thing he thought it would be , again though he wasnt exactly clear on the details of what that was , perhaps he didnt want to give capitailism much of clue .
            We may never know ,what he saw as the failings of communism , as he was always pre occupied with what he saw as flaws in capitalism . In some ways you can see why intellectuals get so absorbed into communism , its a bit like designing your own version of the simms , utterly absorbing .

            He died still waiting for the right sort of communism to occure and overlooked a great many of its failings , in so doing , he perhaps made the mistake of a being too intelectual to consider how it corrupts .
            The quote of 20mn dead is provocative , perhaps designed to be so …

    • 263
      ploppa says:

      I can shape the turtle to resemble a bounty

    • 264
      m'Lud Mandlescum of Crotch and PrittyBoyz says:


    • 265
      ploppa says:

      should it read “to poo toblerone”

      surely you want more than one

  60. 247
    Anonymous says:

    Apropos of nothing in particular my pacemaker came very close to a short-circuit when a few moments ago I read the following on the sky website :”Brown held on drink-driving charge”.
    It turned out to be someone called Bobby Brown, I believe quite famous in America…

  61. 258
    Call me ‘Dave’ says:

    Good evening!

    Tomorrow I wish to be known as

    The Spineless Placeman for Warm-Hearted Angela and her Shock Troops of €USSR Financial Rectitude.

    Thank you.

  62. 261
    Use by 22 Oct says:

    If the rules have changed then Guido should let us know what goes and what doesn’t.

  63. 271
    Use by 22 Oct says:

    Trump offers $5million to Gordon Brown to apologise for GB’s financial mess.

    • 294
      nellnewman says:

      ++Laughs+++ trump is an idiot if he thinks he could pay gordon even £100million to apologise and say his ‘I’ve cured boom and bust’ was wrong!!!!

      gordon will NEVER say he failed!!!!

      • 301
        Ah! Monika says:

        ref Trump has offered Obama to publish his College application and Passport details

        • 303
          Ah! Monika says:

          offered $5million

        • 387
          Wharton Business School Rulez! says:

          As Trump went to one of Harvard’s rivals he gets revenge by showing that Obama was admitted because he was good at coloring.

          Fair Harvard we join in thy Jubilee throng,
          And with blessings surrender thee o’er
          By these festival rites, from the age that is past,
          To the age that is waiting before.
          O relic and type of our ancestors’ worth
          That hast long kept their memory warm,
          First flow’r of their wilderness! Star of their night!
          Calm rising thro’ change and thro’ storm.

          To thy bow’rs we were led in the bloom of our youth,
          From the home of our infantile years,
          When our fathers had warn’d, and our mothers had pray’d,
          And our sisters had blest thro’ their tears.
          Thou then wert our parent, the nurse of our soul;
          We were molded to manhood by thee,
          Till freighted with treasure thoughts, friendships and hopes,
          Thou didst launch us on Destiny’s sea.

          When as pilgrims we come to revisit thy halls,
          To what kindlings the season gives birth!
          Thy shades are more soothing, thy sunlight more dear,
          Than descend on less privileged earth.
          For the good and the great, in their beautiful prime,
          Thro’ thy precincts have musingly trod,
          As they girded their spirits or deepen’d the streams
          That make glad the fair city of God.

          Farewell! be thy destinies onward and bright!
          To thy children the lesson still give,
          With freedom to think, and with patience to bear,
          And for right ever bravely to live.,
          Let not moss-covered error moor thee at its side,
          As the world on truth’s current glides by
          Be the herald of light, and the bearer of love,
          Till the stock of the Puritans die.

      • 323
        On Looker says:

        GB is history – he’s done – finished – as far as the UK is concerned – though Heaven help the foreign youngsters he’s going to ‘help and encourage’.

        No, we have big enough probs here in UK with an ineffective ‘government’, a woe-begotten ‘leadership’ and an almost zero public understanding of where this is leading.

  64. 274
    Blowing Whistles says:

    When a bilderberger has inside information – which causes a conflict of interest to the “Public” – how can he act in any capacity and claim to be acting “in the public interest”?

  65. 281
    Blowing Whistles says:

    Night night – quiet day for guido & Co – but the EU is still going down – it’s holed below its bows – thank Fuck they ain’t got a sticking plaster big enough to cover the gaping wounds..

  66. 284
    Aunty Matter says:

    I see one Newsnight hack has resigned and the other had a stand up public row with Jordan.

    Oh it’s great to see the BBC tear itself apart

  67. 290

    After the Royal family, the order of precedence is:

    Archbishop of Canterbury
    The Lord Chancellor
    Archbishop of York
    The Prime Minister
    The Lord President of the Privy Council
    The Speaker of the House of Commons
    *now we know why it is called the Lower House*

    The Lord Speaker of the House of Lords
    The President of the Supreme Court of the United Kingdom
    The Lord Chief Justice of England and Wales
    The Lord Privy Seal.

    • 292
      Ah! Monika says:

      Where does 8illy fit in?

      • 295

        I wish you hadn’t asked that…

        • 297
          Ah! Monika says:


        • 298
          Ah! Monika says:

          Let me ask you this then.
          If you multiply a negative infinity by a negative infinity, what is the outcome?

          • Ah! I can give you the answer to this one! And it is not too complicated either.

            John Prescott.

          • Ah! Monika says:

            hey, come on I went to sleep on that one last night, and still haven’t come up with a mathematical answer. Do I have to ask Engineer?

          • OK. I think Engineer will support me when I say that infinity is not a real number so the question contains a category mistake.

            You cannot treat it algebraically and say plus infinity.

          • Ah! Monika says:

            Hmm. I was wondering whether 2 infinite ( pos or neg ) integers are the same

          • Ah! Monika says:

            Amazon showing a number of books which I think I need to read.

          • Look, go back to basics.

            ∞ + 1 = ∞

            It does not obey standard mathematical laws.

            You might as well ask how many volts has an orange? It simply doesn’t work.

          • Ah! Monika says:

            ∞ + 1 = ∞ + 1 Surely.

            Only teasing. Bedtime. No doubt you’ll be up till after 3.00am

          • Or 3.00am + 1.

            Where have you been? On hols?

          • Ah! Monika says:

            No Ah! Monika has been blocked for weeks
            When I was a boy
            Religion the original sin
            use by 23 oct blocked this am
            moved on to use by 22 oct.
            and various others inc Thinc as a Planck

            thought you may have sussed by the double entendres. C’est la vie

          • Another Engineer says:

            Which infinity? There are different infinities, believe it or not.

            There are more real numbers (decimal numbers) than natural numbers, although both are infinite.

            Infinity is not strictly a number, so you can’t really multiply it.

            You could define a function which at a limit tends to negative infinity, multiply it by itself, and then take the same limit. In most cases you will get positive infinity.

          • Ah! Monika says:

            I’ll re-read that in the morning when I’m sober ( ish )

          • @Another Engineer.

            So we differ slightly in interpretation but both agree that infinity is not a real number. Would you agree?

            People tend to think I am Erwin but I am really only his cat…

          • Another Engineer says:

            Georg Cantor was the man who worked out the properties of infinite sets.

            Which is probably why he died in a mental institution.

            Might be best to approach the problem drunk.

          • Another Engineer says:

            No, you were quite right, it isn’t a number in the normal sense – and you can’t just multiply it without a proper definition of what you mean by infinity.

            This is getting to the top end of my pay grade though – an Engineer probably ranks below cats when it comes to pure mathematics.

          • I just love this stuff because (afraid I have to put it this way!) it helps me to think out of the box. It can then flow back into other areas of one’s knowledge with beneficial effect.

            I have recommended David Deutsch’s Fabric of Reality to several people here (Paragnostic enjoyed it) and wonder if you have read it?

    • 378
      Man at the top says:

      So where did Jimmy Savile fit in on that list ?

  68. 300
    Saffron says:

    Berk whatever name he wants to call himself on a No Plate,is nothing more than a turncourt tosser the man has more edge than a gillette.
    As for his gypsy wife well words fail me to refer to her in a gentlemanly fashion.
    The ongoing saga of wind power is one of the biggest ponzi schemes in history as will be shown over time.
    Well done to Guido over the rent issue,please keep at the troughers.
    Police Commissioners what a debacle,another jobs for the placemen and another burden for the poor taxpayer.
    The Beeboids,all at sea because they are being taken to task,this is the tip of the iceberg for them and other parties.

  69. 306
    ted baker's pearls says:

    I hope bercow and wife , having purchased expensive cars and numberplates at our expense are not also travelling by first rail etc!!

  70. 311

    One of the policies for my blank sheet of paper…

  71. 316

    I love a Noilly Prat.

    I am enjoying one right now.

  72. 325
    Herman of the EU says:

    Ziss discission is now over. Zere haff been multiple violations of EU humour regulations, most notably ze failure of any mention of anybody slipping on a banana skin. But ve are not all monsters – I haff fond memories of seeing Bobby Davro at ze Broadstairs Paladium.

  73. 326
    Bob Fleming says:

    when’s the necrophilia thing coming out?

  74. 345
    Anonymous says:

    Do try to keep up Guido, this was in the papers days ago!

  75. 346
    carryingthecan says:

    You lazy shit. Why aren’t you looking at Nicholas Kroll?

  76. 351
    Tom Watson is a slimy, oily cock says:

    The interesting story today is the calculated behaviour of Tom Fatson and his rank hypocrisy. The Murdoch saga clearly went to his head and now he’s desperate for more attention, but instead of mentioning the bbc, he’s rather slimily tried to shift focus onto a past Tory government. It goes without saying that any MPs, past and present, should be brought to book, but it’s this sleazy way that Watson is attempting to let the bbc off the hook that is so shameless. It’s about time someone punctured this fat c-unt’s ego.

    • 357
      not a machine reloaded says:

      Thats not the half of it , Ian Dale on sky news papers review has just said , person Tom Watson named in commons , was a Tom Watson error and has since said he meant someone else ……

      • 377
        Chinese whispers says:

        Not so, Dale said Watson said it was someone in Thatchers Government, but he didnt .However its safe to assume Watson IS refering to a Tory as there is no way in hell he would implicate a labour pervert.

  77. 352
    I bet she gives good head says:

    Catching up with today’s pmqs. Say what you like about Caroline Flint but I’m liking the short skirt she wore. She’s got a cracking pair of legs, the dirty minx.

  78. 353
    Film titles if loony left councils were in charge says:


    Avengers Assemble
    Multicultural Heroes Pool Their Diversity

    The Godfather
    The Godmother


    Lethal Weapon
    Lethal Weapons Should Be Banned

    Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom
    Colonial White Man and the Cultural Traditions We Should Respect

  79. 358
    not a machine reloaded says:

    Interesting snippet was that Germany removed a substantial ammount of gold from BOE when euro was launched in 2000 . Gordon sold half our gold reserves in 2004 ……
    2012 Germany and France are entering recession , UK may have some slight improvement .

    If true (and ime thinking of Battle of Britain film when Laurence Oliver gets phone call on numbers ) and I hope it is , well done . If there is anything of a soul or spirit of a nation , even in such a tarnished area as finance , I shall say this “we do not die on our arses “

  80. 359
    Tachybaptus says:

    Can’t use the Freeloader any more, thanks to Guido. Replacement already ordered:

  81. 360
    not a machine reloaded says:

    Being as there has been some analysis of high frequency trading (although not much said about how NASDQ gets in quicker than others ) , I can see that in certain circumstances it makes volatility a pure trend/numbers matter , rather what is in accounts , and the counter argument about it smoothing things out .
    But arnt you forgetting that it isnt really doing what Equities are supposed to do in the grand scheme of things . Isnt it tieing up equities into traders accounts and not allowing them to disperse into more long term vehicles of influence into the economy . ie is all the benefits of Equities now mostly interbank business and not smaller indivduals in for the long term?

  82. 361
    not a machine reloaded says:

    mmm funny everyone seems to think Ed did well at PMQs , well the conservatives , although not perhaps the coalition have had a rather bad week . While everyone seems to have gone on Eds energy banter (not that he got any gas storage built ,when in power , so we were peculary susceptable to gas price fluctuations ) . Yes it wasnt good for the conservatives , but somehow if lesser questions turn out later to be significant , bear in mind Sir Peter Tapsells from today .

    Also bear in mind the trash can of claimants and injuries in the news at the moment , why did labour not sort them out when in office …

    • 383
      Anonymous says:

      I wonder what a foreigner would think if they chanced to see PMQs ? they would definately get a shock when ED stood up to make stupid, irrelevant comments to the PM. with the morons ED B, Hattie, Yvette etc nodding like those car ornaments sitting around him.

      • 396
        Apache says:

        Or cameroid shouting and blustering in his red faced out of control manner ,while clegg looks as though he is either in a trance or bored to death and gideon looks like a naughty smirking schoolboy with his smirking face Some of the others look as though they would rather be anywhere else than where they are.Imust agree, not a pretty sight.

  83. 364
    albacore says:

    Ooh Yer! A moment’s silence for Mr Squeaker
    The future for him ain’t arf looking bleaker
    You don’t mess around with that Number Thirteen
    Especially coming up to Hallowe’en

  84. 367
    smoggie says:

    Bercow should park it down the back alley.

  85. 375
    Sally says:

    I find t’s effing good for doggin’ !

  86. 380
    Anonymous says:

    Did he claim it on expenses?

  87. 384
    Fernando DLC says:

    Clearly he is not *that* concerned about keeping his address private. It’s almost like he doesn’t seriously believe it is a security risk.

  88. 386
    Disco Biscuit says:

    I thought Berkow was spelled with a K?

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Guido-hot-button (1) Guido-hot-button (1)

Cathy Jamieson MP, Labour’s Shadow Treasury minister, commenting on Treasury analysis of the economic impact of tax changes…

“If the Treasury is looking at the economic impact of tax changes, then surely it should examine the impact of the rise in VAT and cuts to tax credits? George Osborne’s £12 billion VAT rise knocked confidence, helped to choke off the recovery and has cost families £1,350 over the last three years.”

orkneylad says:

What’s he been doing FFS, mining bitcoins?

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