October 9th, 2012

Dave’s Birthday Treats

This evening SamCam will take her husband out for a birthday curry in Birmingham, with excited bookies going as far as taking bets on what they’ll be having. Sauces close to the Prime Minister, as the (terrible) joke doing the rounds goes…

Earlier Dave’s people bravely bought him a set of “I love Boris” cufflinks, presented just after the Mayor of London’s rabble-rousing speech. Guido hears the stallholder even chucked in an “I love Dave” pair for free. Meanwhile the Speccie reports that the PM was the lucky recipient of an framed Conservative Research Department staff list dating back some 25 years. Apparently it says a certain David Cameron was “arriving soon”…

Pic via @jimwaterson


  1. 1
    Selohesra says:

    I expect John Major will fill his mouth with a tasty Curry if he’s invited along

  2. 2
    Milk. Correction Venezuelan Election Monitors. Don't Laugh says:

  3. 3
    Selohesra says:

    Two firsts in a day – I am the new 8illy

  4. 4
    genghiz the kahn says:

    Bespoke Saville Row tailors speak out against hysteria to rename their street.

  5. 5
    freddy the furry fish says:

  6. 6
    Now then... says:

    Sir Jimmy Savile’s grave in Scarborough is to be dismantled following allegations he sexually abused girls.

  7. 7
    Diane said says:

    Diane Abbott said: “I feel very privileged to be going to Venezuela as an official election observer. I am not here to lobby for any particular candidate,


  8. 8
    Boris the Beast says:

    I bet sam has the chicken
    Well she did marry one

  9. 9
    And says:

    Can we pee on the remains?

  10. 10
    Bill Quango MP says:

    Polling shows that before his conference speech Mr Miliband was seen by 42% of the population as insubstantial and lacking vision.

    However since his successful speech Mr Miliband’s persona has improved and he is now seen by 42% of the population as ‘just a bit of a dick.’

    Thanks to News Quiz USA for that.

  11. 11
    The Countess of Wythenshawe says:

    I think it is most disrespectful of the Prime Minister to go out for a meal when over three million are unemployed and the economy is shrinking .

    He should be working at his desk to sort matters out .

    I know it is his birthday . A takeaway pizza in his office at taxpayers’ expense would be proportionate

  12. 12
    8illy 8owden, the world's greatest umplre says:

    Sir Jimmy Sovile, please.

  13. 13
    8illy 8owden, the world's greatest umplre says:


  14. 14
    ed martin says:

    they’ll be having chicken tarka – its like tikka but a little ‘otter

  15. 15
    Tay King-dePisse says:

    Boris probably isn’t the only person Dave would probably like to give a “cuffing” to, right about now…

  16. 16
    Aunty Matter says:

    Are you a twat as well then :)

  17. 17
    Steve Hilton back 31.01.13 says:

    I bet there will be no tip unless the cameras are there .

  18. 18
    annette curton says:

    Curry, £50 e/w.

  19. 19
    Boris the Beast says:

    Pilau the other one

  20. 20

    In the Gruniad – the Pilgrim story.

    Pickles highlighted that he had made it a criminal offence for councillors not to declare if they union members, in receipt of union funding or unable to attend a council meeting after being given time off for union activity.

    What ??

  21. 21
    sekwaf odiug says:

    Dave is having one of his many holidays, you begrudge him a holiday in Birmingham do you?

  22. 22
    Why have they not arrested Vaz says:

    Do you think he will invite all his friends from Chipping Norton ?

  23. 23
    Boris the Beast says:

    Dave is having Naan of all this Boris mania

  24. 24
    Corrie L'Anus says:

    Poppa Dumb anyone?

  25. 25
    Corrie L'Anus says:

    Bet Fatty Pickles will be asking for a doggy bag…

  26. 26
    Boris the Beast says:

    There is Methi in Daves madness

  27. 27
    Looopy Lou says:

    I bet he turns up tomorrow smelling of garlic

  28. 28
    sekwaf odiug says:

    Where are the kids, hope they are safe Dave has a bit of form there

  29. 29
    Corrie L'Anus says:

    Slime Pickles anyone?

  30. 30
    And says:

    I see J S got his OBE in 1970. Was Ted Heath PM then?

  31. 31
    sekwaf odiug says:

    Curried pickles

  32. 32
    annette curton says:

    The Guardian is a criminal and civil offence.

  33. 33
    Boris the Beast says:

    Mark my words
    Dave is heading for a phall

  34. 34
    sekwaf odiug says:

    S, there cann’t be another 8i££y, can there?

  35. 35
    When I was a boy the poor were skinny says:

    Pizza; at least he’ll end up ‘looking’ poor

  36. 36
    Boris the Beast says:

    Meanwhile Boris has just asked a starry eyed and nubile activist to korma over to his suite

  37. 37
    I don't need no doctor says:

    Anyone got the “Ed Miliband for PM” cuff links?

  38. 38
    I don't need no doctor says:

    or the “Ed Miliband One Nation” cuff links. I see a business opportunity.

  39. 39
    When I was a boy the poor were skinny says:

    usually only goes one way.

  40. 40
    Dave "Butch" Cameron says:

    I don’t suppose there’s much point in wearing my “Don’t blame me I voted for David Davis ” T-Shirt tonight.

    I much prefer my lapel badge “I’m a Pleb”

  41. 41
    When I was a boy the poor were skinny says:

    Leaf it alone.

  42. 42
    annette curton says:

    Must get myself a sad tattoo.

  43. 43
    Corrie L'Anus says:

    a lot of oil and fat in that mind

  44. 44
    Enemy of the State says:

    Matching his and his coke spoons?

  45. 45
    Corrie L'Anus says:

    Meths more like!!

  46. 46
    When I was a boy the poor were skinny says:

    I hope he has his body-guards round him. Those Balti boys send a proportion of their take to P4ki5t4n. Not India.

  47. 47
    Baldy says:

    Bet on a Tory eating a curry in Birmingham – squits in.

  48. 48
    Corrie L'Anus says:

    and clearly the banning of sick leave to have gastric bands fitted…

  49. 49
    Corrie L'Anus says:

    No problem it will be a COBRA meeting (note: other premium lagers are also available)

  50. 50
    Pawn Sandwich says:

    Will they be having papadocs?

  51. 51
    I don't need no doctor says:

    Don’t have Jimmy Savile on it.

  52. 52
    Hamza la vista! says:

    Just read Abu Hamza, real name Mustafa Kamel (no, really) has had his trial date set for August 26 2013. Marvellous. Another 10 months in custody where hopefully he’ll either be in solitary or face daily abuse, followed by a trial in New York which will find him guilty, followed either by life in prison without parole or death row. Savour this moment. We don’t often have the chance to see justice served but on this occasion we can relish the pleasure of seeing this piece of shit and the other four fuckers, including Babar ba-ram Ahmed, get what they deserve.

  53. 53
    I don't need no doctor says:

    Didn’t Ed Miliband make some sort of speech the other week?

  54. 54
    Baron Hogwash says:

    Give us a rest Boris, the olympics are over!
    If you want to be leader, become an MP first.
    PM never!

  55. 55
    Dave's a good chapathi says:

    Couple of delegates fell ill after a late night curry. One’s in a korma and the other one’s got a dodgy tikka.

  56. 56
    annette curton says:

    Could be suffering from an Edwina.

  57. 57
    Corrie L'Anus says:

    ….I’ll bet there will be baltli on the beatch….Brum!! Brum!! (ahhhh oh for the return of Basil Brush…one puppet Fox that only had Uncle Roy fiddling with him and was mildly funny to boot!!)

  58. 58
    Corrie L'Anus says:

    He haiti’s that stuff…

  59. 59
    From Chav to Chavez says:

    So who is paying for Fatbots and Chav Jones’ Jolly? And more to the point how are left wing activists considered neutral election observers. And even more horrific why are they wearing lanyards and passes and pseudo military uniforms?

  60. 60
    Pawn Sandwich says:

    Thats strange, he had it with pickles last week.

  61. 61
    Chicken dupiaza, sag aloo and a Cobra or Kingfisher says:

    Good rule of thumb when choosing an Indian restaurant. Go to one that serves alcohol, because it means they’re Indian. If they don’t serve any alcohol, that means they’re Pàkistani muslims and the food is halal, which is the most barbaric way to slaughter an animal.

  62. 62
    Jimmy says:

    OBE from the Grocer and a knighthood from his friend Attila.

  63. 63
    annette curton says:

    Jimmy Savile raped me?.

  64. 64
    hows about that then says:

    Jimmy’s A Vile

  65. 65
    Airey Belvoir says:

    Dave’ll certainly vindaloo if he has a curry in Brum….

  66. 66
    annette curton says:

    Modbot kicked in again, think I will go to N.Korea.

  67. 67
    Mr Rotivator says:

    Just popadom the table please

  68. 68
    Chicken dupiaza, sag aloo and a Cobra or Kingfisher says:

    The vindaloony left are demanding the return of Abu Hamza. They say his human raitas have been violated. But critics say allowing Hamza to return would be a bhoona to the jihadi cause and the UK is having naan of that. Lefties need to find a new cause. This one is so daal.

  69. 69
    Corrie L'Anus says:

    after his performance on Ch4 with Mr ‘Lurid Ties’ he ought to start eating red meat…anything to spice up a dreadfully insiped performance…Boris must think it’s his birthday not DC’s!!

  70. 70
  71. 71
    Dying to know says:

    The mystery over Constance Briscoe’s arrest is too much! Surely someone has heard a thing or two on the grapevine and can post it here, even if it has to be asterisked in parts!

  72. 72
  73. 73
    Shamble Chuckrafarti says:

    Shut up you horrid baby eating bastard!

  74. 74
    ToonBob... says:

    One white, one not so……

  75. 75
    Aunty Matter says:

    Neo Guido has been let loose

  76. 76
    ToonBob... says:

    Hmmmmm a not so ??

  77. 77
    Grant Craps says:

    Grant Shapps is a slimy shit. The testimonials on his Michael Green website have been exposed as fake.

  78. 78
    And says:

    He bought his first yacht Morning Cloud in 1969 !!!!!

  79. 79
    Handycock Capo di Capo Soviet Reublic of Portsmouth says:

    I always get a free curry at George’s, the Akash, in Portsmouth. George lets me have it for free and I provide him with workers. He also makes sure all the Bangladeshi residents vote for me, as he is their leader. Boaz George.

  80. 80
    George of the Akash says:

    Boaz your lordship.

  81. 81
    Sign petition to stop plans for a "super mosque" says:


  82. 82
    UKIP.i.am.awake says:

    A desk? Luxury. As there are so many unemployed he should be chained to the floor with manacles and beaten with a pointy stick until there is no-one unemployed and growth is at least 100% per annum.

  83. 83
    UKIP.i.am.awake says:

    He’s just rogan joshing.

  84. 84
    Corrie L'Anus says:

    What is the point in being Tory Party Chairman or Treasurer etc if you are ‘whiter than white’….one would expect no less….need an entrepenurial spirit..risk taking that’s what we is about…Gideon boasted so!!

  85. 85
    UKIP.i.am.awake says:

    If it’s one of them forrin restaurants the chef could be a cannibal and then Pickles may be on the menu.

  86. 86
    I don't need no doctor says:

    Channel 4 News. Yet another example of how thick and hypocritical John Snow is. He gave Cameron a hard time about himself (John Snow) having a Freedom Pass. Well you have to apply for a pass, so why did Snow apply for it, if he believes he earns enough and doesn’t need one.
    Snow you are a prat.

  87. 87
    Aunty Matter says:

    Very interesting to catch lefty Mark Easton’s ‘spin’ on the BBC news regarding the proposed changes to the law covering burglars and Theresa May’s plan to allow victims of crime to select the punishment for an offender.

    Easton of course opposes both, in the case of burglars he totally forgets to mention that under the current law even if you act clearly in self defence, fat idle plod will still arrest you and lock you up in a cell for the maximum time whilst they ‘investigate your crime’ (really they just sit in front of the TV eating pies). Then the useless twats take months to decide no we won’t prosecute you on THIS occasion. The stress for any normal person is intense waiting for the outcome. The proposed changes will PREVENT fat idle plod from arresting you in the first place. That is a big change. Easton of course said it was controversial to many. Really? What many? A few gays and drug addicts at the BBC and Guardian? Who gives a fuck.

    Then Easton had a go at May’s idea, claiming that this was a massive change in the law as for hundreds of years only a judge or a court could enforce a punishment. Really? So the Police don’t hand out cautions then? What about speeding tickets that come through the post declaring you are guilty so pay up? Or massive fines to get your car unclamped? Courts my arse.

    How this fucking mong ever got a job amazes me, when Nu Labia were in power this c u n t used to read out Gordon Brown’s crime tractor stats as facts even when they were totally made up and he had to apologise the following day.

  88. 88
    Diane Abbot says:

    Constance be hhhinnocent! Free da Briscoe 1, blud!

  89. 89
    I don't need no doctor says:


  90. 90
    I want to piss on his grave says:

    And to think I posted a tribute to that c-unt Savile when he died. Piece of shit pulled the wool over everyone’s eyes, except, it seems, the bbc who did fuck all to bring him to justice.

  91. 91
    Lord Bilimoria says:

    The Cobra’s on me

  92. 92
    N*eo Gw*e**do's going m**ad with the **m*dB*t again says:

    Who’d have thought it? Sli*my shit David Camo*ron, fa*ke Co*nservative and com*pulsive li*ar, hi**res sli*my Sh**app (con**man and com**pulsive l*iar) as Tor*y Pa*&*rty Ch**airman.

    Oh well, at least they got rid of Wa**rsi.

  93. 93
    I don't need no doctor says:

    Any statement yet from the cowardly Ed Miliband. Well are you a millionaire or not? Waiting for it to blow over? It ain’t going to happen mush.

  94. 94
    Old Holborn says:

    Meanwhile, up and down the land, Labour councilors are meeting up with children. For sex


  95. 95
    Diane Abbot says:

    Shut up, blud! Me will go to da wall for me sistah!

  96. 96
  97. 97
    Abigail Lemonparty says:

    I did some work with Jon Snow a few years ago at ITN in Grays Inn Road, and contrary to what you might think, he’s actually very dim.

  98. 98
    I don't need no doctor says:

    Ya face looks as if it hit da wall.

  99. 99
    Corrie L'Anus says:

    Hope said Bunteresque one doesn’t ‘bhaji’ in then!!

  100. 100
    I don't need no doctor says:

    Dim and rude, fits in well at C4 News.

  101. 101
    Diane Abbot says:

    Bernie Grant called me a big puddin’ of love! Bogle bogle as me wind me body!

  102. 102
    Corrie L'Anus says:

    Then they were in mutually good company ….awwww how lovely!!! Snow was being a prize knob…but consistency is the key!! At least we Guidoers know whom Magda Carter is!!

  103. 103
    Abigail Lemonparty says:

    Of course he’s a millionaire. Ed “Class Warfare” Milliband, multimillionaire.

    He’s just trying to confirm that multimillionaires such as himself really are going to get £40,000 cheques from the government. And then he’s off to donate the money to charity spend it on champagne.

  104. 104
    Annon & So On....... says:

    latest US News of Abu Ham Za is that he is now hookless for 22 hours a day…!!

    Perhaps we should have a whip round (calm down you LibDems, your rent boys

    will pass by later)………

    Whip round for Mrs Abu Ham Za 1st class ticket (one way) over to the States

    & comfort him ……….

    Two problems solved in one go….plus a property to go back into

    social housing stock…….

    what can be wrong for such a nice person…….

    His Trial date has been set for August 2013…….should be interesting ………

  105. 105
    Licence to Fee says:

    Those of you who hate the bbc, which is everyone here, can I ask a direct question? Do you want it abolished it altogether or just privatised so that it has to make its money from advertising like ITV etc? If it’s the latter, the licence fee would be abolished, which is what you want, but it wouldn’t necessarily alter any perceived political bias. Would you be willing to tolerate a biased bbc if it’s not funded by the public?

    And more importantly, don’t you enjoy any bbc programmes? It did employ Tory Jim Davidson for over a decade, and has employed other Tories like Brillo, Jeremy Clarkson and Gyles Brandreth.

  106. 106
    annette curton says:

    You just could not make it up, him banging on about millionaires, the truth is Ed is not only millionaire, he is a multi-millionaire, not another one that’s suffering from the the early onset of altzeimers is he?.

  107. 107
    Aunty Matter says:

    I see the yanks won’t give Hamza anyone to wipe his arse, thing is 10,000 ‘men’ at the BBC would lick it clean for free

  108. 108
    Hamza la vista says:

    I think it’s essential that on humanitarian grounds we ensure Mrs Hamza is allowed to visit her husband in New York as soon as possible. It would be cruel and inhumane of us to insist she stays in her taxpayer funded £1m council house. For compassionate reasons, we should get her to New York to visit Abu at the Supermax as soon as possible.

  109. 109
    genghiz the kahn says:

    Cast Iron Dave is about to let under 18s vote in Scottish Independence Referendum, the boneless wonder cannot be trusted to save The Union.

    Just wait for the Polis to arrest the happy under 18s celebrating after they vote for the first time.

  110. 110
    Blowing the whistle on Entwhistle says:

    Labour = The BBC = The Guardian.

  111. 111
  112. 112
    Stan Butler says:

    I want every BBC employee vetted for their political views and a balance put in places to remove not a perceived polital bias but an extremist left wing political bias. I am happy to pay a modest fee to support public broadcasting, but not to run a left wing propaganda machine in behalf of the British Labour Party and the other leftist wonks that the BBC seems keen to support.

  113. 113
    Anonymous says:

    “Tory Jim Davidson for over a decade, and has employed other Tories like Brillo, Jeremy Clarkson and Gyles Brandreth.”

    Ooh, how generous of them, it’s only about half the voting public who vote Tory and pay the license fee after all. BTW, Davidson isn’t tolerated anymore because he hates gay and supports the armed forces.

  114. 114
    Anonymous says:

    child abuse = neglectful family. auntie has been caught with her nickers down.

  115. 115
    Aunty Matter says:

    I’d give the vote to 3 year olds if it ensured the jocks fucked off

  116. 116
    Boris the Beast says:

    Curry on up the Khyber as Sam will find out in a couple of hours

    Sam, its his birthday,Goan
    Let Him,
    maybe even scream “Ghosht” when he whips out his chanas
    Your man needs some help just now

    (Emailed via Mr Khan)*

    10% discount to all delgates
    Free papadoms ut no LibDem chutney

  117. 117
    Gordon Brown says:

    i deeply regret my appearance in Downton Abbey

  118. 118
    Aunty Matter says:

    There was a great interview on TV where poor Hamza’s bottom was discussed. Here in the UK it was hand washed (probably by someone from the BBC or Guardian) for his every time he took a dump.

    It appears in America he will have to do his own wiping, I’m gutted for him, I really am.

    They need to provide his with a rubber hand or something so I understand. Problem is he’ll have to get Bubba’s cock out of his arse first to wash it.


  119. 119
    Boris the Beast says:

    Mr Genghiz
    Your average Jockanese hasn’t even worked out how to work out cooking facilities that don’t involve setting fire to heather or indeed how to invent a piece of clothing that protects your clacker bag from rough foliage
    I say we enrol every one of the ginger haired bastards into the SNP at birth, then ask the four bys for some wall building advice

  120. 120
    Aunty Matter says:

    Snow is a twat.

  121. 121
    Boris the Beast says:

    Yes to a sheeps bollocks and lungs for supper or No to paying their way ?
    I look forward to 12 weeks in Barlinnie for speaking my mind

  122. 122
    Boris the Beast says:

    Or Indeed
    Downs Syndrome at the Abbey when you had your last child Christened
    That “joke” has to be worth at least 6 months jail time

  123. 123
    az mah uba the USA Maxprisoner......... says:

    Help …..Help …..Listen you filthy infidel none believers , I’ll give you my kingdom

    for my platium NHS hooks………..but certainly not my UK benefits or numerious

    bastard off spring weekly payments……….

  124. 124
    Hamza la vista says:

    When John Prescott goes to a curry house, he looks at the menu and says “That’s fine”.

  125. 125
    albacore says:

    Let it sink or swim on what it can earn
    Reality is what it needs to learn
    If you want to watch any “free” TV
    Why on earth must you pay the BBC?
    You don’t need a licence from the CoOp
    If Tesco’s the place where you go to shop

  126. 126
    Fish says:

    He’ll be off to Balti Towers

  127. 127
    Sir Elton John says:

    Abu Hamza, quite obviously, was not who we had in mind when Bernie and I wrote this song, released, ironically enough, in Autumn 2001:

  128. 128
    Boris the Beast says:

    Dave will be having a really good quantative easing at 3 AM
    You can also guarantee that his Balti will be full of spit , spunk and lots of other “extra special spices”t
    On the other hand the santed Boris will be be getting the full Maharajah treatment
    He is after all a wog
    9 months

  129. 129
    Tachybaptus says:

    The Romans used a sponge on a stick. At a public latrine, the sponge was rinsed in the permanently running water and re-used by the next customer. I’m sure that something like that could be fitted to Hamza’s left stump (right is for eating, left for wiping). He couldn’t do much harm with it — but there is one reported case of a German prisoner destined for the lions who choked himself with the sponge rather than face a nastier end in the arena.

  130. 130
    Bronco says:

    There’s nothing worth reading below this.

  131. 131
    Boris the Beast says:

    Hey you wanted a cave , now you have one
    Lit 24 hours a day, no hooks to wank with, American Halal (it wont be a takeaway from the local Balti house)
    You can turn on a TV and listen to the message of the true lord
    whte walls,white noise, white light , incessant noise from da brothers(who are mostly Christian , if fallen ones)
    enjoy your stay and take comfort from the fact that you will serve as a lesson to the bufoons that followed you
    Take him to the hole

  132. 132
    I do hope karma gives you cancer for that says:

    And you call the left nasty. Mocking a disabled child because of who his father is. Classy.

  133. 133
    I do hope karma gives you cancer for that says:

    Hilarious. Now why don’t you go and help clean up the pile of faeces Mrs Thatcher is sitting in and wipe the drool from her face?

  134. 134
    Bee bee sea says:

    Eastenders is quality drama.

  135. 135
    Boring wanker alert says:

    “Classy” – by now, that’s a very tedious attempt at irony. Why not think up something for yourself?

  136. 136
    The coalition says:

    Leaves on the line

  137. 137
    Fuck the bbc says:

    No the programmes are shite – end of

  138. 138
    Saffron says:

    Cammoron needs to grow a pair of bygone conservative balls.
    The Cons have had in the past some strong leaders,the last one being Thatcher and before that Churchill.
    This party now has become wimpish led by Cam who is a PR merchant and nothing less.
    How the hell can a proper consevative party be dictated to by the likes of the LIB DUMBS led by political fortune seekers like CLEGGOVER unless they want power at any cost.
    The Liebour party given what they did to this country are not worth a toss with their commie agenda.
    The beeboids and their under age exploits need to be subject to intensive investigation and appropriate action taken.

  139. 139
    Jimmy Savile's Ghost says:

    Now then now then boys and girls looks like the BBC have been caught with their collective pants down as it happens.

  140. 140
    Gordon mcfuckwit broon says:

    Trouble is the referendum is on the wrong side of the border….

  141. 141
    Fuck the bbc says:

    An elitist ignorant twat at that

  142. 142
    Jimmy Savile's Ghost says:

    Would you like to see some puppies?

  143. 143
    Fuck the bbc says:

    Ed millionaire to you

  144. 144
    John Prescott says:

    I will put you straight. When I go to a curry house that’s six lunch times and six evenings a week cos I am cutting down. I only order three of the whole main menu as a side dish. Normally the 198 dishes are spread over 24 tables, which means I have the whole place to myself.

  145. 145
    PC clitoris says:

    If there is any justice someone will take a shit in the curry sauce before they serve up Camorons balti

  146. 146
    Its Not just my Viewpoint says:

    The badge thats says “Jim fixed if for me” has now taken on a whole

    new meaning with all of the revelations that are seeping out into

    the public domain everyday…………..

    Al-Beeb’s Chairman of the Trust along with the Board & DG must be in

    constant meetings trying to re-act to every new facet of this decades

    long perversion that happened on so many peoples watch, how many of

    these will be brought to account. This evil will no doubt be the final

    act that brings the Al-Beeb dinosaur crashing down to earth.

  147. 147
    Boris the Beast says:

    Chicken Kharma?

  148. 148
    Anonymous says:

    Kay Burley made a good point on Sky News today questioning whether Savile’s victims may sue the BBC for sexual assaults which had taken place in Corporation buildings.

  149. 149
    Anonymous says:

    Give the English a vote.

  150. 150
    jgm2 says:

    Good rule of thumb is to buy a pound of mince, a tin of tomatoes and a tin of kidney beans from Tescos and then all have a chilli at home for a fraction of the cost of a curry from Brick Lane or (if in Birmingham) the Stratford Road.

    This ensures that your spending stays in Europe and does not go to Labour (or Respect) voters, be they from India or Pa*ki*stan.

    Under no circumstances shop at Co-Op since it is a Labour front organisation.

    Vote with your money.

  151. 151
    Boris the Beast says:

    I dont mock the afflicted in reallife
    So you are safe
    Infact I would defend you
    Thing about you lefty “mongs” iis that you take everything as an affront
    I have neigbours with Downs (Its a sheltered housing block)
    Lovely child like people and Thats not me being patronising , just an observation

    So please feel free to take yourself and others a litle lessseriously you potential child murdering socialist (+

  152. 152
    Norman Stanley Fletcher says:

    Not missing you already.

  153. 153
    Boris the Beast says:

    I dont live in the block , just near to it and am pleased that they live amongst us and are well cared for , rather than being shut up in a huge warehouse
    This was a Tory policy, your lot would have sent them to a gulag or worse
    You have previous when it come to that kind of thing

  154. 154
    jgm2 says:

    According to the BBC PC Knacker is now pursuing 120 lines of inquiry. That’s getting into the Harold Shipman league of serious crime.

  155. 155
    jgm2 says:

    Pickles highlighted that he had made it a criminal offence for councillors not to declare if they are union members…

    Suddenly it all makes sense.

  156. 156
    Boris the Beast says:

    So thats another £50 on the TV extortion racket M’Lud

  157. 157
    Tooth fairy says:

    pursuing 120 lines at the BBC…. no news there then…….. snorrrt!

  158. 158

    I have said this for several years now. We should use the bank model and split it into a Good BBC and a Bad BBC.

    The good BBC can be sold off to the highest bidder. I would anticipate a realisation of at least c£20bn to pay down part of the government debt.

    The Bad BBC could then be given as a gift to the Scotch parliament.

  159. 159
    Boris the Beast says:

    Fuc kin ell
    Im good looking and funny
    But 120???????
    Im a rank amatuer
    Or maybe a MECCA amatuer (that works on two levels)

  160. 160
    jgm2 says:

    who is paying for Fatbots and Chav Jones’ Jolly

    Hugo Chavez, who else? On the upside they are all now in Caracas and even more at risk of serious injury/death than in their own ethnically enriched constituencies.

  161. 161
    The stench of corruption says:

    Who has appointed these two lefties as election observers, who has trained them, who is paying them, who do they represent?

    They are clearly not neutral and were backing Chavez to win. This stinks

  162. 162
    annette curton says:

    LOL, the evidence is not to be sniffed at.

  163. 163
    jgm2 says:


    120 lines of enquiry.

    ‘It was good while it lasted’.

    Fucking hell. This is going to be quite an impressive cover-up from the BBC.

    I can smell the internal memos burning from here.

  164. 164
    Left Foot Forward says:

    Do we honestly believe this man would have gone quietly, had he lost? And that, with a government machine stuffed full of his own party members, he would not simply have supplied a different voting figure, had his state-of-the-art computer system produced an unpalatable one? The answers to these last two questions we will probably never know, but the fact that we cannot reasonably give a negative to them in all conscience leaves a highly unpleasant taste in the mouth.

    And then there is the British connection. Labour MPs Jeremy Corbyn Grahame Morris and Diane Abbott, long-time Chávez supporters, have been out in Venezuela for the elections along with such reputable figures as, er, George Galloway and Jody McIntyre.

    More interestingly, with no trace of irony, Abbott and Corbyn Morris are going in the capacity of “official election observers”. Official observation, naturally, implies unquestionable neutrality. Diane Abbott even went to the trouble of tweeting me from Caracas that she “made a point of saying I wasn’t supporting a particular candidate”. But let’s look at that a little closer, shall we?

    Abbott is patron of the Venezuela Solidarity Campaign an organisation which claims to be a friend to Venezuelan democracy but, strangely, does not seem to contain a single supporter of Chávez’s opponent, Henrique Capriles. One of its stated aims is “To defend the achievements of the Bolivarian Revolution”, i.e. Chávez’s political movement.


  165. 165
    In The Know says:

    Alan Yentob is one of the people at the BBC who covered up Jimmy Pedo Savile going on’s.

  166. 166
    Boris the Beast says:

    Sovile used to have a home in Jockland

    He loved the smell of “Nae” palm in the morning
    Just friction Burnes from a fresh wee lassie

  167. 167
    just a thought says:

    If BBC bosses covered up Saville’s sexual assaults,they Fixed It For Jim.

  168. 168
    Boris the Beast says:

    Any idea about his religious habits?

  169. 169
    albacore says:

    Rumour has it that’s standard preparation
    (Few curry buffs suffer from constipation)
    Since the LibLabCons, too, keep dishing it out
    Dave must be immune now to a good clearout

  170. 170
    Redrum says:

    I’m having a lovely evening with Shergar and jimmy Savile.

  171. 171
    Its Not just my Viewpoint says:

    Yes looks like “Who knew what was really going on at Al-Beeb & When”

    cannot be swept under the thick pile carpet this time, handshakes & calling

    in favours are not going to help. As this large can of perverted worms is

    completely emptied out & all those that have been hiding in there are

    dragged out into the open to fully account for there part in this scandal

    before the Criminal Court.

  172. 172
    jgm2 says:

    On one hand, it stinks. On the other hand they had to travel to Caracas, travel around in armed convoys like frightened rats and were still at risk of random attack, kidnapping or murder.

    So, on balance, the stress of being there brought forward their removal from our sphere of tolerance.

    Going on a ‘fact-finding’ mission to Caracas under Chavez has all the appeal of going on a fact-finding mission to Zimbabwe under Comrade Bob. It might be exciting for baby-face Owen – at least he’ll have something interesting to write for teacher ‘What I Did on My Holidays’ but for anybody who has ever travelled to somewhere you’d actually choose to go on holiday then I reckon armed convoys between hotel and restaurant is probably more like a posting to Nigeria than a weekend at Georges V.

  173. 173
    When I was a boy the poor were skinny says:

    Scots to vote yes / no .
    With 99.999% of in receipt of English benefits, I wonder what the outcome will be?

  174. 174
    Grahame Morris MP Chair of Labour Friends of Venezuela and neutral election observer. says:

    Reflecting on the result of what is a deeply significant fourth term for Hugo Chavez and the enactment of his pledge to resist Neoliberalism there is no doubt that the people of Venezuela have shown the way to a wider audience of left leaning politicians the world over that there is a popular alternative to austerity. I feel privileged to have witnessed it.


  175. 175
    Mansfield QC says:

    Defend the BBC? Decisions, decisions.

  176. 176
    jgm2 says:

    They closed down the News of The World after 160 years on the mere allegation that one of their sub-contractors had hacked a missing girl’s phone. Yet we’re all supposed to cheerfully send off 145 quid a year to an organisation that is alleged to have been facilitating the procurement of minors?

  177. 177
    jgm2 says:

    To be fair it is only 88% of Scotch household who are net beneficiaries of taxation.

    I wouldn’t be at all surprised if it was approximately the same percentage in England. The figures tell us that 1% pay 25% of total income tax and 10% pay 50% of total income tax. Since the budget isn’t balanced that suggests that even some of the top 10% are net recipients. Let alone the other 90%.

  178. 178
    Its Not just my Viewpoint says:

    How long will it be before there is a large mass of people who Vote with there

    wallets & won’t Pay this B B C £145 annual Perversion TV Licence

    extortion ?

  179. 179
    jgm2 says:

    a popular alternative to austerity.

    Is he seriously suggesting that the people of Venezuela have somehow, with a show of hands, abolished ‘austerity’? A country that appears to be ploughing the same ‘austerity-free’ field as Zimbabwe?

    How do these people remember to breathe?

  180. 180
    Anonymous says:

    lose employee rights in return for shares in a company – an interesting suggestion.

  181. 181
    Its Not just my Viewpoint says:

    And SKY News are being very helpful every hour on the hour as J S is the lead

    story as it should be, sorry Michael some cases are so open & shut they cannot

    be defended other than to ensure all those guilty of covering this scandal

    including all of those right up the command chain @ Al-Beeb who knew what

    J S & others were really up to, but did nothing, that is indefensible in any court

    especially the powerful Court of Public Opinion !!

  182. 182
    Contamination Jihad says:

    Dave, you want extra ingredients with your kurma?

  183. 183

    I couldn’t find anything.

  184. 184
    albacore says:

    If (as if!) Dave chops the licence fee
    How long do you reckon it’ll be
    Before the corporation goes broke
    Just paying “stars” that are a sick joke?

  185. 185
    Scottish Voters will never vote to lose the English "Cash Cow" that funds their lavish lifestyle says:

    90% English would vote in favour of Scottish Independence…….

  186. 186
    DZ says:

    Guardian: “Jimmy Savile: the BBC must opt for full disclosure to draw a line under its past
    The corporation should commission a social historian to bring the whole sordid story to light – and unravel its collective secrets”

    Jimmy Saville is under suspicion of sexially abusing young girls. The BBC appear to have some knowledge. There may be people still alive who were directly involved in the abuse. There maybe people alive who had knowledge of the abuse and failed to act.

    An investigation by a “social historian” is not appropriate. The Guardian again show a lack of understanding of how serious this is

  187. 187
    Cameron is a Cunt says:

    message to Dave

    people are already dying under your fascist government regime – so it’s not do OR die for them – disabled people are being routinely killed by the tory government whilst labour looks on and says nothing. ethnic cleansing of the disabled kind is alive and well in britain. is this what he meant by olympic legacy the fucking c’unt

  188. 188
    The Age of Aquarius says:

    Apparently it was a “different world “then ……….????????????????

  189. 189
    Uncle Joe says:

    My solution would have given you more joy. All of them shot and their families down the mines.

  190. 190
    jgm2 says:

    The Catholic Church might want to commission a ‘social historian’ too. I’m sure they’d much prefer that to having the police crawling all over the place. As would the BBC and Graunaid no doubt.

  191. 191
    UKIP.i.am.awake says:

    And babies are being eaten out of starvation. Yes we know. But in the real world they aren’t sexually abusing children and covering up for them as the BBC have been doing. And what’s worse is that we have been paying for it when we pay the telly tax.

  192. 192
    UKIP.i.am.awake says:

    If you really want to succeed as a career criminal work for the state.

  193. 193
    Ernestine Tentions says:

    It is OK, CiaC, to post that here but I would not repeat it to anybody in a white coat and dicky bow when you attend the outpatients’ clinic.

  194. 194
    Yvonne from the Colliers Arms Clydach says:

    Who in their right mind has a birthday party sitting next to William Hague ?

  195. 195
    Pedalo-Phile says:

    Will it have eggs in it?

  196. 196
    Rinka Scott says:

    We should all be talking about the economy stupid .

  197. 197
    sekwaf odiug says:

    And the company goes bust!!!!

  198. 198
    Some Twat up North says:

    Will they be stabbing a fox with champagne glasses, like the old days? Blees em!

  199. 199
    Some Twat up North says:

    Mines? What mines?

  200. 200
    Some Twat up North says:

    Whilst on the subject of this Hunt . Does anyone know what benefits his family are still receiving? We can be sure they are still in that state funded £700,000.00 house. But, how much a week are we paying the fuckers and more importantly, if Gideon is after saving another 10 Billion from welfare wouldn’t these fuckers be a good place to start?

  201. 201
    Some Twat up North says:

    The only thing you make out of pickles would be a nihari. Long slow rendering of meat covered in a thick layer of FAT. Yummy…

  202. 202
    Some Twat up North says:

    Another Gayer?

  203. 203
    Some Twat up North says:

    Get your head back under that pillow, you’ll wake the wife up…

  204. 204
    Pedalo Phile says:

    What’s all the fuss about?

  205. 205
    David Laws. Gayer and Thief says:

    I’d love to sit next to Willy, I think He’s Yummy xxx

  206. 206
    Pundit too too says:

    Strange that this week is National Curry Week yet there is not a national public curry event in Birmingham or indeed I can find in the UK.
    Now which of the top 10 Birmingham curry houses did Dave and Sam go to and what did they eat?
    Guido should know this and let us know.

  207. 207
    Pundit too too says:

    And asafoetida to you too.
    You don’t know where your ging.

  208. 208
    Pundit too too says:

    Loved the quote from Boris’s ex boss Max Hasting saying that Boris is ambitious, ruthless, but lacks judgement (among other things).
    Lacking judgment is the sword of Damocles over any politico, and seems to be a major fault in the Bullington Club as well as the Liebor Party.

  209. 209
    Corrie L'Anus says:

    Someone who loves those every so sexy constipated Larry the Lamb dulcet Yorkshire tones….the Republic must be shuddering having him in their midst tha’ knows

  210. 210
    Edwina froo froo says:

    Eggs were off.

  211. 211
    Curry mania says:

    9500 “Indian” restaurants in UK and 68% are owned by Bangladeshis’
    Like the Chinese of the 60’s and 70’s Indians have moved on to better things.
    Mother love states it all.

  212. 212
    BBC aka Bring Back Communism says:

    You have to be a died in the wool loony left winger AND in the trouser pockets of the BBC to make a good living out of us.

  213. 213
    Pundit Too says:

    Problem is that sad old Alex Salmond must realise this, yet is too cowardly to put it up for fear of alienating his supporters. With the English vote he would certainly get the independence he want, and does not need 16 year olds to do it.
    I would do it to get rid of all Scottish MP’s from Westminster.

  214. 214
    Pundit Too says:

    According to the man handling the ITV Saville programme this morning, the 120 lines of enquiry is only the tip of the iceberg.
    Can anyone truly believe that over 40 years there was only 30 victims? Especially when one considers Saville’s gang of child molesters.
    BBC are pushing the 70’s and 80’s culture thing, but failing dismally – as was stated this morning it was all illegal, and if they did nothing they were encouraging a crime.
    Could it be possible that the BBC also had an an “inside gang” promoting homosexual behaviour, which they now advocte? This was also illegal at the time.

  215. 215
    the savant says:

    “Sauces” close to the Prime Minister also say Sam and Cam will be exchanging forget – me – nots after dessert as a reminder to take each other home at the end of the meal .

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Rising Stars
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Alan Milburn says Labour’s scaremongering campaign for an unreformed NHS will not win election…

“It would be a fatal mistake, in my view, for Labour to go into this election looking as though it is the party that would better resource the National Health Service but not necessarily put its foot to the floor when it comes to reforming. Look, reforms are not easy, but the Labour Party is not a conservative party. It should be about moving things forward not preserving them in aspic. You have got a pale imitation actually of the 1992 general election campaign, and maybe it will have the same outcome. I don’t know.”

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