October 2nd, 2012

Tommo’s Late Night Blonde Plot Busted

Tom Watson managed to escape his own gate-gate moment when he tried to bust a young blonde into Labour’s conference hotel without credentials late last night. Although there is is no official police control around the Midland Hotel, stewards were having none of it, not even for the Party’s Deputy Chairman. Managing to show some restraint in light of recent pleb-related outbursts, Watson was left apologising to his young friend and promptly abandoning her. At least he can’t blame how this one ended on the Murdochs…


  1. 1
    jgm2 says:

    The stewarts probably didn’t recognise him.

    Just another fat bloke trying to get a hooker into the hotel.


  2. 3
    Tom Watson is a fat, slimy cunt says:

    Why would any sane woman want to be seen with Tom Watson? Unless she’s the type who gets paid by the hour?


  3. 4
    Hang The Bastards says:

    I wounder if she gave him his money back ?


    • 77
      Toenails is a cnut says:

      Fuck me I’ve just listened to the biggest heap of biased shite I’ve heard from the BBC News at 6 and that’s saying something.

      Toenails just filled in the gaps between adulatory coverage of Miliband’s speech with Labour talking points (eg an irrelevent reference to Andrew Mitchell’s “pleb” comment) then rounded off with the comment “Game on” referring to Ed’s supposed image turn around since last year.


  4. 5
    Tom Watson would like a date with Alizee says:


    • 19
      Jimmy Savile says:

      Urggghhhhhhh Pretty but I’ve never gone for the more mature women. If they’re GCSE age or above I don’t want to know.


      • 24
        Mike Handycock says:

        I hear you, brother.


        • 112
          Wayne Rooney says:

          As Benny Hill once said: “Give me an older woman every time; they don’t yell, they don’t tell, and they’re grateful as hell!”

          (Didn’t seem to take his own advice much by the looks of it, though…)


    • 120
      President Hollande says:

      He can fuck off.. me first!


  5. 6
    Taking the middle road says:

    I thought he was going steady?


  6. 7
    it was a dark and stormy night says:

    It does not say wether the blonde was male or femail, no doubt the blonde was bussed in from brighton


  7. 8
    Aaron D Highside says:

    Probably the type who’d fancy Huhne.


  8. 10
    Droit de Cuissage says:

    Droit de Cuissage?


  9. 11
    Jimmy Savile says:

    I was busted with a young blonde once. Fortunately the chief constable was a fellow mason and he dropped the challanges. Urrrrrrgghhhhhhh!


    • 15
      Handycock says:



    • 26
      The General Public says:

      I am loving that people are trying to render that bizarre croaking noise that Saville used to make as a written word.

      Most attempts I’ve seen today seem to suggest someone choking on something or masturbating…… hey, WAIT A MINUTE!


  10. 13
    I like Tom Watson says:

    THIS Tom Watson, that is.


  11. 14
    Enoch was Right says:

    I hope he paid her.


  12. 17
    Fatso says:

    He is minging!


  13. 21
    Religion: The Original Sin says:

    Any update from Eastleigh Crown Court?


  14. 22
    Helen Kellers dating agency says:

    Fatso was giving a refund!


  15. 23
    Labour's Rosie Cooper put chocolates and crisps on expenses says:


  16. 27
    Lewinsky says:

    Is that a cigar Twatson is smoking?

    I sold it on eBay.


  17. 28

    What a cad!

    He should have booked a suite in the Palace Hotel and taken her there away from the attention. The £2,000 could easily be charged to expenses.

    And fancy just dumping a blind woman late at night. Not nice, is it?


  18. 34
    A woman says:

    He abandoned her?!
    What a gent…


  19. 35
    Siobhan says:

    I paid. Well worth the try.


  20. 37

    Interviewer: So Mr Miliband, are you proud of being the grandson of a mass murderer?


  21. 40
    Tran Svestite says:

    Blond ! It was a wig.


  22. 42
    Esther Wants-some says:

    When will these little balding men realise they can view but not touch the goods.


  23. 47
    Fatty Holly MP says:

    It’s all part of my devilishly brilliant plan to return Labour to Government and, dare I dream, me as Deputy PM. I have to be seen as “a regular bloke,” not some fat mong who sits around and plays xBox all the time whilst wolfing down crisps and drinking beer, an image admittedly not without some small justification, but I digress– if I am seen as “Tommy the Lad,” a karaoke-singer and DJ at functions where people are having way too much fun, I will shed my Seth Rogan I’m-a-fat-idiot-blundering-through-life image and be seen more in the he’s-lots-of-fun-to-be-around light. Hooking up with a ditzy bird (and read into that what you will, you polluted-mind degenerates!) does nothing to dispel my public image as a flagrant heterosexual, albeit getting a bit long in the tooth in my late forties to engage in too many late night romps:”Tom got busted with a young gal!”/”Good on him, way to go, kid, didn’t think you had it in ya!” At least this is the way my devoted bloggers and re-Tweeters will play it, don’t you know?


    • 88
      Jon Dunn-Juan says:

      The clock is ticking
      And hubris has time
      To run the course
      Of your view of self.

      Hear the chimes,
      They start………


  24. 51
    Anonymous says:


    perhaps she had read this modest piece – and actually believed it


  25. 52
    All Socialists are hypocrites(and now they're patronising b*st*rds as well says:

    “One nation Labour !” …RFLMAO…I went to a COMPREHENSIVE School dont ya know ? So what ? So did 80% of the rest of us !! AND I come from a WORKING class background Mr Miliband ….my father and grandfather were Miners …..which is more than YOU did…but I still think you’re talking total and utter “Shite!”

    This is one of the most divisive political parties in the history of British Politics….they have made an art of class envy and stifling aspiration in the working classes with everyone being dumbed down to the lowest level…. I was fortunate to go to Grammar school and on to University but that was in the 60’s and social aspiration has been killed stone dead now….and THAT Mr Miliband is a result of 13 years of LABOUR educational policy…..and let’s not forget that LABOUR is solely responsible for the mess that the country is in and for the CUTS not the Coalition


  26. 53
    the stench of hypocrisy says:

    I went to a comp.
    But unlike Milliband I didn’t live in a mansion in a posh part of London,go to Oxford Uni, the LSE or spend a sabattical at Harvard. Nor was I able to use Daddy’s contacts to work in TV or for the Labour party.
    His pathetic attempts to appear as a man of the people just show him up as the wanker we all know he is.


    • 66
      Gooey Blob says:

      I went to a comprehensive, but I don’t care for hypocrites who practice class warfare one day and then try to claim to be a “one nation” party the next.


  27. 54
    Anonymous says:

    Scraping the bottom of the barrel, Greedo.

    Looks like it was actually a good day for NuLab.

    Time for Hatty Hatemenperson to remind everyone that NuLab is really a party for femnazis, perverts, and foreigners.


  28. 63
    Pentangelis says:

    What is far more interesting is who was this blonde and what was this fat, ugly disingenuous slob doing with her anyway?


  29. 64
    a lucky escape says:

    “Managing to show some restraint in light of recent pleb-related outbursts, Watson was left apologising to his young friend and promptly abandoning her.”

    If he was a real gentleman he would have taken her for a tour of Manchester’s skips.


  30. 64
    THE Young Blonde says:


  31. 67
    The Sickening Bunch Who Were NuLiebour says:

    Surely that was some form of abuse on Watson’s part as she must be blind.


  32. 69

    Eds speech writing notes found crumpled in the bin in the hotel room.

    Look guys! I want 46 ways of saying I have a vision for the country ok? 46 new power slogans and buzz words , Ok?

    So what have you got?

    One Nation
    ONE! nation
    Won nation.
    1 nation,
    Nation one,
    whun nation.
    one nashion,
    Huan nation,
    one nation
    one space station.
    sun nation,
    spun nation,
    run nation,
    bun nation.
    One station.
    One stop shop.
    one 4 all.
    All 4 one.
    one One idea.
    All bar one nation
    Nation Statham
    One nasturtium
    Elation nation
    flirtation One??
    One nasal son
    One vocation
    One neighhhhsion!
    nation of one.
    Fun nation!
    Thracian nation.
    gun nation.
    overdone nation
    one matron?

    - Boss…couldn’t you just say ONE NATION 46 times?
    – yeah..why not? Who’s going to notice?


    • 111
      The Paragnostic says:

      Was it just me who was half-expecting Ed Balls to finish the event with a rendition of “Tomorrow Belongs To Me”?


  33. 70
    Yvonne from the Colliers Arms Clydach says:

    This is absolutely disgusting .

    Manchester has a bad enough reputation without this .

    Labour should be banned from the city centre .


  34. 71
    A patrician called Andrew says:

    Manchester is a city full of plebs


  35. 72
    Religion: The Original Sin says:

    Yang Sing Menu
    Won ton nation £3.65


  36. 74
    chutney says:

    is there a fetish that involves squeezing blackheads on fat blokes backs?


  37. 76
    Aunty Matter says:

    I was highly impressed with Harriet Harman applauding wildly when Ed Miliband told us he was proud to have gone to a Comprehensive school, after all so did Hattie…..oh hang on no she went to one of the top private school for ‘gels’ in the Country.

    But never mind Harriet sent her own children to bog standard comps……oh hang on no she sent them to those Tory bastard Grammar schools in Kent.

    Perhaps she was applauding herself for being a mong?


    • 78
      annette curton says:

      A triumph of delusion over reality as usual.


    • 79
      Hungerford says:

      George Monbiot would be writing his musings in his own shit on a cave wall if it wasn’t for capitalism


    • 83
      Harriet ( where have we heard this before ) Harman says:

      I was supporting our Leader.


      • 95
        Aunty Matter says:

        Just as Hattie applauded the one eyed mong when he waffled on about the Iraq war being wrong and the OTHER Miliband had to lean over and say “why the fuck are you applauding, YOU voted for the war”


    • 134
      That's no way to speak about Lord Longford's niece says:

      See Above!


  38. 82
    Aunty Matter says:

    This is a hoot. Perhaps Ed is frightened to be seen out with someone who looks like a 10 year old boy?


    He likes dressing up so perhaps he should take her out when he’s got a blonde wig a cigar and tinted glasses on?


  39. 85
    Where are Werritty's business cards now says:

    These Socialists are all in this together hand in hand with the Bankers .

    The Banks managed to give Vaz 7 or 8 mortgages with total monthly repayments in excess of his salary .

    With thinking like this is it any surprise the Banks went bust ?

    And when they went bust who conned the taxpayer into bailing them out ?

    The Socialists did it.

    The sooner the people of the UK follow the Greeks and take to the streets the better .


  40. 87
    Ed Mililband says:

    She does anal and he was bringing her in for me.

    When I am PM you lot will terminated.


  41. 89

    Any news on what transpired at Huhne trial today?

    *only facts on progress – not opinion please*


  42. 92
    gramma says:

    This scoop has all the characteristics of a put up job Guido.
    I would imagine it has been orchestrated by Watson himself to allay the public’s fears that he is yet another raving iron and quash the doubts circulating about his heterosexuality or the lack of it.
    It takes all types they tell me. I hope at least he gave the palomino truck fare back to the farm.


  43. 94
    Blonde Slapper says:

    Sleezy fat Hunt wanted it for nothing.


  44. 98

    The delegates looked happy after Ed’s speech:



  45. 100
    Blonde Slapper says:

    Did I say Hunt sorry about my spelling. It should have been cnut.


  46. 107
    ToonBob... says:

    I suspect he ended up having a ham shank !!


  47. 113
    I don't need no doctor says:

    Ed Miliband’s speech was pure shite. It took the media by surprise that Miliband could actually speak for so long. But Miliband, according to wee Dougie Alexander, had been working on the speech for months. I think in the cold light of day the media will question just what was it that Miliband said. Let me tell the media now, nothing at all. All Miliband did was to plagerise bits of other peoples speeches.
    There was no substance and no policy, just words from plastic Ed.


    • 128
      just asking says:

      Is David Milliband at the conference and did he applaud the speech?


    • 146
      Lady Virginia Droit de Seigneur says:

      Actually earnest left-wingers like Ed can bang on for hours without pausing for breath. No one – including fellow lefties – listens for more than 30 seconds.


  48. 117
    Saville row says:

    Now then, now then!


  49. 135
    Head doorman Midland hotel says:

    Ed Balls not taken Yvette on a date in ten years,Did she get tired of waiting, she’s blonde, Watsons got some explaining to do!


  50. 142
    Baron Hogwash says:

    So who was the bird that Tom was trying to smuggle in?


  51. 144
    Ed (i'm not my brothers seat warmer) REALLYBLAND says:

    Did he claim her on expenses ?


  52. 145
    Lady Virginia Droit de Seigneur says:

    Most decent hotels have someone hovering about the foyer to either:

    1. Stop hookers coming in and hanging around the bar and touting for business.

    2. Stop middle aged blokes who are away from their wives bringing hookers back to the hotel.

    It appears we are dealing with situation 2 here – it is also worth noting that the bloke is invariably middle-aged, fat and drunk. You may think this describes Tom Watson but I couldn’t possibly comment


  53. 148
    Mrsshitrit says:

    Did Watson sell any of his books btw?


  54. 149
    Markie says:

    Sure it wasn’t a chick-with-a-dick ?


  55. 150
    ToonBob... says:

    Anything new on the ‘working girl’ who plummeted to her death in n0n-suspicious circumstances?


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