October 2nd, 2012

Chuka and the Arms Dealers

He was the cuddly, smiley man of the people when he gave his speech to the conference hall in Manchester yesterday, but when the sun went down Labour delegates saw a very different side of Chuka Umunna. The two-faced shadow business secretary wooed arms dealers at a fringe event last night. Chuka even hinted that he would back the controversial BAE-EADS deal, telling representatives from the companies that: “I want to reassure you…we have an open mind. We see this very much as a national interest issue, it’s far too important to play politics”.

Chuka Umunna, friend of the man in the street. And the arms dealer…


  1. 1
    Kebab Time says:

    Blair done deals with Gaddaffi, why surprised?

  2. 2
    Pikey Northerner says:

    This man’s operator for sure. He’ll say anything to get a vote, please his audience and gain power. He’s slippery about his past and evasive about his future.

    He’ll go far in politics.

  3. 3

    An hour is a long time in politics.

  4. 4
    Sir William Waad says:

    You’re accusing Chucky of having a patriotic side?

  5. 5
    Hang The Bastards says:

    What a poor speaker. You can hear him talking bollocks…. it just oozes from his gob

  6. 6
    Jimmy Saville says:

    Cuddly? The man is a creep.

  7. 7
    Plato says:

    The BAE-EADS deal will be signed and sealed before the next election, anyway. Who cares what Labour think?

  8. 8
    Jimmy says:

    I wonder why Guido has taken such a particular dislike to him. It’s almost inexplicable.

  9. 9
    Peter Grimes says:

    Let’s hope that he goes, away, as far as possible. He represents the very worst of the implacably slimy ZaNuLieBor power seekers.

    The 2015 GE will be the last at which we will have the opportunity to make them face up to the economic mess they have again left us in. Their having allowed unfettered immigration to gerrymander their client state will tell in 2020, if, that is, they allow the people to vote at all!

  10. 10
    Steve Miliband says:

    Always thought he was armless

  11. 11

    Only in a parallel universe. ;-)

  12. 12

    Savile. Remember the vile part…

  13. 13
  14. 14

    You would not climb over Gloria De Piero to get to him, I imagine?

  15. 15
    UKIP convert says:

    The BAE- EADS proposed deal is nothing to do being a good viable business marriage. But more of the low life mendacity & manipulation by the ConsLieLaborLibDems Blood Brothers Alliance to ensure we the British People are imprisoned in the EUSSR with no chance of ever getting out its clutches, regardless of a over whelming YES vote to leave this Germanic Dominated Dictatorship.

    Don’t let them get away it……….

    Start by VOTING >>>>> U K I P 15 November 2012

  16. 16
    V1le Labour ruined my Country says:

    Oily Chukka Uppee is just doing what all the political class do, setting up future payments for himself. In 5 to 10 years his bank accounts will be scrutinised the same as oily Vaz.

  17. 17
    Good old fashioned Labour hypocrisy says:

    Is Chucky still charging £20 an autograph? What kind of utter fuckwitted moron would actually happily pay £20 for that c-unt’s autograph anyway?

  18. 18
    fruitcake says:

    BAe, actually more Yank than British

  19. 19
    Ex-Tory says:

    Guido is very quiet on Keith Vaz. He was earning less than £50k, but had mortgages on 8 properties, paying £26k a month! How does he get away with such corruption?

  20. 20
    Professional Lefty Whinger says:

    Guido….why are you picking on this man…is it because he iz black?

  21. 21
    Captain Hook's lawyer claims he needs an MRI scan says:

    I cannot believe the gall of this despicable lawyer. This country is far too soft and lenient on muzee scum. This piece of shit should have been deported years ago but thanks to a Labour government was allowed to stay here and live off benefits whilst planning our murders, and now he wants free healthcare off the NHS, even though we all know he isn’t ill. His pathetic lowlife fuckwit lawyer is playing the system to buy Captain Hook more time. Eventually time will run out for Abu Hamburger and he will be sent to where he belongs, a nice small cell in an American prison where hopefully his cellmate will take his hook and stick it where the sun don’t shine.

  22. 22
    Steve Miliband says:

    Assumed he was a Tory?

  23. 23
    The public says:

    I would hope it is because he is on the make.

  24. 24
    Anonymous says:

    “It’s almost inexplicable.”

    “Almost” inexplicable, but not completely so. Even for you.

  25. 25
    Jimmy says:

    Quiet? He was stalking him last night.

  26. 26
    Moussa Koussa says:

    This Chuka fella really has put the wing up you Guido…Worried are you…LOL

  27. 27
    nellnewman says:

    Some wealthy,kindly, labour donor helping out with untraceable cash for favours returned perhaps?

  28. 28
    Jimmy says:

    Europeans need to bring their resources together under the blue flag to fairly compete with the US and our friends in China and Russia.

  29. 29
    The public says:

    The government is making a huge strategic mistake.

  30. 30
    Jimmy says:

    Chuka is Britains Obama. This blog knows it. Suck it up.

  31. 31
    jgm2 says:

    Blair was Britain’s Obama. Suck it up.

  32. 32
    nellnewman says:

    I suspect chuckasyamoney was simply doing what these self serving politicians all do – making contact with a profitable industry, making himself amenable and indispensable with a view to getting nice profitable little directorship in a few years time.

  33. 33
    The public says:

    The only scan he needs is at the airport security gate

  34. 34
    nellnewman says:

    Like being a taxi for hire you know – now which politician was it said that?

  35. 35
    jgm2 says:

    Wallowing in Vaz’s grief more like.

  36. 36
    The public says:

    Or simply putting his hand out in the expectation of a brown envelope. Either way, he’s a c*unt.

  37. 37
    MARX ANC Co. says:

    Nothing patriotic about carting an European defence company.

    How is being part of a communist organisation patriotic?

  38. 38
    Jimmy Sa vile says:

    Another Mr Fixit

    ows about a bung or a grope

  39. 39
    jgm2 says:

    ‘Our friends in China‘. Are you John Prescott?

  40. 40
    Al Capone says:

    Vaz is very thick skinned. He doesn’t do grief. Not unless the wreath is on expenses. If he’s been crying it is more likely that someone has been cruching his balls and telling him that whatever happens he is going to say nothing to incriminate anybody else.

  41. 41
    nellnewman says:

    He’ll have to get rid of that offshore inheritance and his millionaire status first.

  42. 42
    Jimmy Savile says:

    Because he is an arrogant cock. Why is that so hard to understand?

  43. 43
    SocialistsRnazis says:

    Piss off to Europhile traitor.

  44. 44
    The only Chucky I like is the killer doll in Child's Play says:

    Upchuck isn’t fit to hand out free copies of the Standard. He’s a total hypocrite who pretends to be concerned for the poor while buying £1000 bespoke suits, keeping money in various offshore accounts, and charging £20 for his autograph. In other words, the archetypal Labour MP.

  45. 45
    Antique Dealer says:

    I thought she was older.

  46. 46
    Away on business says:

    I am in China. You don’t have any friends here Jimmy. If you started spouting your idiocy here you would find people giving you a very wide berth like you had just wet your trousers

  47. 47
    R1cardoC says:

    A dear friend told me last night that it is widely anticipated that Mr E. Milliband will be deposed post May 13 elections to be replaced by a Mr C. Umunna – I’m off to Ladbrokes!

  48. 48
    Sir William Waad says:

    Nigerian father, lawyer mother……what he can’t steal, he sues for.

  49. 49

    If Jimmy were to be there, he would not even be allowed to post what he did.

    Then where would we be?

  50. 50
    jgm2 says:

    Balls won’t like that. He thinks it’s his turn to be PM.

  51. 51
    jgm2 says:

    If criminality is hereditary then he’s hit the jackpot.

  52. 52
    jgm2 says:

    Our mattress replacement and laundrette [Duvets washed, same day service] industry would collapse.

  53. 53

    Even leaving all that aside for a moment, he posted the vilest music and groups out there. In a time of almost unprecedented musical progress, he championed the banal.

    He was the Gordon Brown equivalent in pop music.

  54. 54
    The Paragnostic says:

    Every government since the 1960s has made strategic mistakes regarding technology and defence companies.

    We used to have a vibrant and diverse aircraft industry in the UK – the intervention of the state culled this sector by poor and lengthy procurement practices, and the agglomeration of the remains into what is now BAE has left us with an expensive and technically limited supplier for our commercial and defence needs.

    The same happened to the computer industry – the common factor in both aerospace and computing being Harold Wilson’s white heat of technology idea, which under the stewardship of Wedgie Benn managed to turn a 5 year lead in technology into a situation where we lag behind the US and even Israel.

    Post war consensus? Fuck it – we’d have been better off committing national hari-kiri.

  55. 55
    jgm2 says:

    It’s what the kids wanted.

  56. 56
    Communists and national socialists says:

    Why are the Germans and the French and the Spanish trying to take over a British arms industry?

    Has history not taught us that they are our natural enemies.

  57. 57
    Oo Zi says:

    I fort he wuz a choc ice

  58. 58
    R1cardoC says:

    The dye is cast.

  59. 59
    jgm2 says:


    Let us all take a moment to savour some red-on-red action..


  60. 60
    Abu Hamza says:

    On the subject of bad uns. How come Huhne isn’t even listed in Southwark Crown Court listings today? How did he manage to get a total media blackout?

  61. 61
    freddy the farting fish fascinated by Phrenology says:

    Germans are our natural friends

  62. 62
    freddy the farting fish fascinated by Phrenology says:

    that is for northerners, I guess the rest of you don’t get it

  63. 63

    Chuka is a posh public school trustafarian who lives by the Mandleson Mantra ” We are extremely relaxed about (our) people getting filthy rich (at the expense of the voting plebs)”.

    Chuka is the next heir to B£iar after Call Me Dave, of course

  64. 64
    One way ticket says:

    Odd innit that these Nigerian men English woman pairings always result in them setting up their nest in GB and never Nigeria.

  65. 65
    Anonymous says:

    too slimy for comfart.

  66. 66
    Mustard Gas says:

    Excepting two world wars?

  67. 67
    jgm2 says:

    My company tried to send me to Nigeria.

    I declined.

    The only people who spoke well of the place were total c*unt-hounds. You’d be on a remote helipad in the middle of the Gabonese jungle and these fuckers would wander off into the jungle and find some local girl to fuck in return for a bar of (company) soap. They liked Nigeria.

    Everybody else hated it.

  68. 68
    jgm2 says:

    We had no business getting involved in the first one. And if we’d declined that invitation then there wouldn’t have been a second one for us to get involved in either.

    The Ame*ri*cans must piss themselves laughing at how Britain and Europe threw it all away.

  69. 69
    Gonk says:

    Yes, it is a bit surprising.

  70. 70
    Sir Jimmy Saveloy says:

    Now then now then, boys and girls boys and girls, especially girls, do you like the music of Showadywaddy? And would you girls like to come back to my dressing room?

  71. 71
    Aardman Animations says:

    What time is Wallace giving his speech?

  72. 72
    The BBC Fanzine 24 Hour News Channel says:

    Ed Miliband went to ( gasp)……… a Comprehensive school !!!! Swoon……………

  73. 73
    Pc Handcock says:

    Socialism is so great – but it is only for the working classes.

  74. 74
    The repressed says:

    Utterly pathetic post really and deluded on so many levels, you can’t criticise this idiot when there was no mention on the site of Cameron showing up in Bahrain to sell them arms during the Arab spring no less. I mean the dust hadn’t settled.

    Also that two faced image at the top is shit. For the love of god get an intern that can use photoshop.

  75. 75
    jgm2 says:

    Who cares? The BBC has got a perfect excuse to shield him from the voters (a child abduction) and I fully expect them to use it.

  76. 76
    Selohesra says:

    Most here would agree he is Britain’s Obama – lightweight, slimy, anti-British, fundementally dishonest & a huge disappointment to the electorate

  77. 77
    Anonymous says:

    what comes natural is the past. should our future belong to our past?

  78. 78
    jgm2 says:

    And the same Primary school as Boris Johnson. Which gives you a hint as to the kind of catchment area of his ‘bog-standard comprehensive’ school.

  79. 79
    freddy the farting fish fascinated by Phrenology says:

    in what way can it be improved ?

  80. 80
    jgm2 says:

    In fairness, with the utter clusterfuck of an economy he inherited, it’s hard to blame him. In that respect, Cameron has the same problem.

  81. 81
    Gonk says:

    Damn, I’m not sure I can catch it. I’ve got a cesspit to empty.

  82. 82
    Aunty Matter says:

    Still no mention of Savile or Balls and his Nazi uniform admission on the BBC news.

    You can always ell when the BBC wants to kill a story, they just ignore it totally.

  83. 83

    The Global Warming brigade are not content just to line the pockets of players in the “solutions” game, they now want to kill us all.

    Asteroid Dust to Blockout the Sun for Combating Global Warming

    Skip intro to 45 seconds approx.

  84. 84
    Anonymous says:

    Sky News politics is all thunder and light.
    real change is slow, hard.
    mandelsonian politics is all quiet and dark.

  85. 85
    Aunty Matter says:

    But Cameron is a nasty evil Tory and Chuka is a cuddly black man who is probably Jesus reborn (well the BBC’s view)

    When socialists sell guns ot black dictators it’s called “empowerment” by the left/BBC. When Tories do it, it’s called exploitation by the same lefties.

  86. 86
    Shhhhhhhhhh says:

    If I gave you an answer to that I’d have kill you

  87. 87
    Aunty Matter says:

    You’s think Nicky Campbell might have had a BBC phone in about Jimmy Savile this morning…but no the BBC decided the story of the day was about Kevin Pieterson.

    The BBC are squirming like the vile scum they are over Savile, this is THEIR phone hacking moment, let’s see plod go pay a visit shall we?

  88. 88
    God's Holy Trousers says:

    Apparently they must not have medical facilities in the US. Poor old Hooky. All the stress has kept the fat shit awake at night. I am looking forward to the day he gets to do the con shuffle in leg irons.

  89. 89
    Loungelizard says:

    So far having listened carefully I can see absolutely no reason for the Labour party conference. Nothing has been said that will make a blind bit of difference to the UK’s future.

  90. 90
    jgm2 says:

    Post 9/11 when the US grounded all planes for 3 or 4 days there was a measurable spike in average temperatures. The interpretation is that it is the sooty emissions from all these planes that are already dispersing the solar radiation before it reaches the lower atmosphere.

    Absent all this airline travel the planet would be considerably warmer. It seems that, far from killing the planet, it is air travel that is keeping the temperature under control. And that is why I object so strongly to the huge airline taxes in the UK. I am being taxed extra for saving the planet.

    Here I am, selflessly travelling the globe to keep the temperatures under control, and I’m being taxed extra for doing so.


  91. 91
    freddy the farting fish fascinated by Phrenology says:

    Is there some event that can be created that will rid us of all the wrongness in the society ?

  92. 92

    Chuka’s policies change with the speed of a photon in an empty space.

  93. 93
    Fuck the bbc says:

    Bring the whole rotten beeb edifice down – go on rupert revenge is sweet

  94. 94

    That is also why I drive my 3.5 litre 4×4 around as much as possible.

  95. 95
    The name is Cock, Handycock says:

    Somebody call? Boaz.

  96. 96

    Thаt іs аlsо why І drіvе my 3.5 lіtrе 4×4 аrоund аs much аs pоssіblе.

    {wtf was this mоdded for?}

  97. 97
    Peter Pan says:

    . . . 40 years of sport fracking in a military prison

  98. 98
    A Catholic Bishop says:

    Shockingly, the BBC appears to have known about his predations but turned a blind eye.

  99. 99
    Norman Stanley Fletcher says:

    That should be “…to compete fairly..”

  100. 100
    Anonymous says:

    is he an actor looking for a stage?
    is he mr reality distortion?
    will he fit a stage now made for co.alitions?

  101. 101
    Sir William Waad says:

    It might just be worth pointing out that there hasn’t been any global warming since 1998. See, for instance, the website of the Climatic Research Unit of the Institute of East Anglia; whereas there has been a general warming trend since around 1850, long before anthropogenic carbon dioxide reached a non-trivial level.

  102. 102
    Norman Stanley Fletcher says:

    I’m disgusted, but not all that surprised. I suspect I’m far from alone.

  103. 103
    Anonymous says:

    what is authentic about chuka. chuka him atomato.
    a rotten tomato might be more nourishing then what you get from slime.

  104. 104
    Anonymous says:

    kids get what they should not get want when the parents are un.able to do their duty. is this called psychological inheritance?

  105. 105
    P*a*u*l Krugman, Nobel Laureate says:

    Re-armament is always good business. It’s what finally pulled the US out of the Great Depression. War may not be a good thing for children and other living things, but it’s good for the bottom line. I stop short of endorsing war as the be-all and end-all, but, y’know, a LITTLE skirmish, now and then…

  106. 106
    the savant says:

    t’a a Nigerian 419 scam , laced with a little Irish Republican volte face .

    ( Goes to his family lineage dont’cha know )

  107. 107
    Quiet Bat Person says:

    Those hooks are going to be fun when he gets inside that powerful MRI magnet.

  108. 108
    the savant says:

    Who was the entity making honking piggy sounds about 2m.15s into the recording ??

    Had Prescott just entered the auditorium ??

  109. 109
    the savant says:

    A Like Minded Soul says :

    Well I iz not of the Caucasian descent and happen to be handicapped by having only one eye and a hook for a hand .

    I iz currently on the conveyor belt for extradition to the US of A which even its fiercest detractors do not deny is a first world country in medical and many other spheres.

    But my lawyer has come up with this wheeze saying I needs one of those MRI scans and that the only country who can give me one is …… UK !! where I reside now enjoying a welfare funded lifestyle .

    My barrister s argument will be predicated on the fact that US MRI scanners cannot ” relate ” to the topography of Middle Eastern citizens because some of their insulation is made from offal residue .

    That s his story any way and it might just buy me enough time to re apply to those no marks at ECHR to quash the whole thing and let me continue living off the munificence of the British Dept of Work and Pensions………….. Inch Allah

  110. 110
    Jimmy says:

    I object to the suggestion that I would ever split an infinitive. Raise your game fake Jimmy.

    Still think it’s jgm2.

  111. 111
    the savant says:

    The Toast Master at the Bar Mitzvah:

    ” And next Sir Jimmy Kiddie Fiddler accompanied by Messrs Jonathan Thing and Mr Gary Litter ”

    There goes the neighbourhood.

  112. 112
    soapy says:

    He is becoming the heir to Vaz maybe?

  113. 113
    soapy says:

    Cat: You used a very naughty verb. Next time try “navigate”. Hope that helps.

  114. 114
    soapy says:

    You should direct your question to Monsieur Robespierre.

  115. 115

    Oh fuck! I had forgotten that naughty word. Bollocks! Shit! Arse! Cuпt! Tits! Wank! Piss! Miliband!

  116. 116
    Jimmy says:

    it’s high time i said something. but what? fffffffffffffffffffffrrrrpt. that’ll do.

  117. 117
    Jimmy says:

    i’m warning you shoe:dangler. no cats on my blog. ffffffffffffffrrrpt. kleenex anyone?

  118. 118
    Jimmy says:

    fribble dibble, time for a wibble.

  119. 119
    Jimmy says:

    there were many who took no notice of me. they were the wise ones…yet still…i live on…fffffffffffrrrrrrrrrrrrrpppt. ffs.

  120. 120
    Jimmy says:

    excuse me, squire. this is my blog, it’s for left handed people only.

  121. 121
    Jimmy says:

    how dare you. i have many friends here. this is my blog! fffffffffrrrrpt. jeez.

  122. 122
    Jimmy says:

    that is a lie! i am a cuddly bunny. not some devious fruitcake. fffffarp.

  123. 123
    Jimmy says:

    i do the stalking here. reveal yourself you utter cad….or get off my blog.

  124. 124
    Jimmy says:

    i repeat. i am 90% polyester. ha! what say you to that? fffffffaaarpppp. ahem.

  125. 125
    Jimmy says:

    you are both sadly deluded. unlike myself. fwwwwaaaarrrrppptt. crikey….

  126. 126
    Jimmy says:

    excuse me. the pagoda is over there mate.

  127. 127
    Jimmy says:

    so near, yet so far. of course you wouldn’t understand. fweeeep fweeeeeep.

  128. 128
    Jimmy says:

    get me a beer will ya?

  129. 129
    Jimmy says:

    i’m looking for bright young sparks to fraddle my zoob. surely someone can help. fweeeeeeeeeeep.

  130. 130
    Jimmy says:

    never mind prescott. i’m bloody certain there’s at least one cat somewhere on this blog…never mind i’ll deal with it later.

  131. 131
    Jimmy says:

    let the work of change begin.by the way did anyone see a cat in here earlier?

  132. 132
    Jimmy says:

    if you need a helping hand give me a shout. ffffffffffrrrrrrrpt.

  133. 133
    Jimmy says:

    welcome to my blog. i just know we are gonna get along. faaaarp.

  134. 134
    The Sickening Bunch Who Were and are NuLiebour says:

    “And the arms dealer…”

    So, clearly in the pocket of Mr Scarlett then

  135. 135
    JH says:

    Typical lefty patronising fuckwit.

    The corollary of your implication is “He’s black, ergo you may not criticise him”.

    Which position is more racist, Jimmy? Are black people like little pets, to be protected? How lucky for them, to have you fighting their corner.

    Guido has lots of targets, few of which have seen a tar brush. I’d say the fact Chukkup is a witless, hypocritical, conniving, oh-so-pretty-boy chancer on the make is more likely to elect him as an entertaining target than skin pigment levels.

    My litmus test is simpler: If Luciana Berger has fucked it, it is probably on the make and to be derided at any opportunity.

    Pogo on that, you Gramsciian fuck.

  136. 136
    Anonymous says:

    obama is grounded. slimebag will lift you if you are not.

  137. 137
    Truthteller says:

    Is he? Hadn’t noticed.

  138. 138
  139. 139
    Keith Vaz says:

    “We have an open mind” translation: If you make a large donation we’re fully behind whatever you want.

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Boris on British Jihadis. Apparently based on MI5 intel:

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