Rich & Mark’s Monday View
If Dave Were President He’d Have Resigned By Now | Alex Wickham
Loongate: What Happened in the Blue Boar Bar | Simon Walters
Feldman’s Tennis Days With Dave | Telegraph
How Geoffrey Howe Has Lost the Debate | Robin Shepherd
Dave Has Lost Control on Europe | Geoffrey Howe
Lib Dems Should Support EU Referendum | LibDemVoice
Feldman’s Denial | Fraser Nelson
Obama’s Presidency is Imploding | Nile Gardiner
Miliband Could Be a Great PM | Thomas Pascoe
What Are You Really Paying in Income Tax? | TPA
Galloway’s Mad Month | The Commentator
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Tom Harris bemoans the public’s attitude to politicians…
“Mr Oborne echoes the lazy, anti-politics whine we hear so often these days, all based on the absurd notion that politicians were once loved and only fell out of public favour during the expenses scandal. He should take a walk to the Strangers’ Bar. But not to sup with the patrons he seems to despise so much, dearie me, no; he should instead look at the paintings on the corridor outside the bar, which depict the devastating fire which consumed most of the Palace in 1834. And he should reflect on the fact that on that dramatic night, as the Commons went up in flames, a crowd gathered on the South Bank to clap and cheer.”
Focus group time. says:
The thing that Dave needs to work out is which group is more likely to vote Conservative. Mad swivel-eyed loons or mad homosexuals wishing to get married.
Now that’s my idea of a man’s man.
Yes but who is it supposed to be?
Not sure if it supposed to be Gordy, but he goes to parliament only fractionally more times than the queen, difficult to tell.
Chris Bryant?
It’s Lord Lucan.
Sam Allardyce?
It’s obvious. A bloke wearing stockings and suspenders – it must be George Osborne. Not sure why the line of white powder has been omitted.
Edwina Currie
Fancy some predistribution?
Time for some quantitative easing, eh baby?
Fancy a snog on the pavement?
I would teabag Ed Balls in a second.
I’d prefer a chocolate log.
Ooh so would I.
I’m more desirable in my smalls.
Well Marr had his hand down a woman’s arse on Saturday and his nose up Balls’s arse on Sunday morning.
That’s my kind of girl.
gurl surely.
You like men that look like men and women that look like men, ummm
I won an all women short list.
Care to share any?
Mind Soap, NOW!
soap, You would need a years supply of mind bleach after that
I’m so glad I haven’t eaten anything today yet.
WTF ?
Widdi the fair? No, despite appearances it is not meant to be Anne Widdicombe.
Only you could have thought of that. Urgh!
More taxing? But the Coalition already put VAT up to 20%.
Yeah, that’s the Liberal misled Coalition.
Go on Smoggie, Vat is the Tories favourite form of taxation, even Guido has waxed lyrical about sales tax instead of income tax, Gideon is starting to thrash around now raising vat again to 221/2% is not on at the moment, it might have got through that raising vat cuts down the amount purchased, but do not rule out a lot of NON-VATABLE items coming under scrutiny, eg got kids, kids clothes non-vatable at present
don’t vote Labour then knob and we would not be in this position in the first place
I don’t vote Liebore ducky, I am a floating voter, the sort of person Tories should be cultivating, pointless talking to the converted, congratulations I will not now be voting tory unless they get their act together but at present there is no sign of that.
If you have kids, and if you have been to any of the main retail outlets recently, you will already know that kids’ clothes cost just about the same an those of an adult. So if those kiddy clothes prices go up, we may expect to see lots more “raggedy-arsed urchins” wandering the streets.
Basic clothes cost sod all these days. I spend less on ties than Grant Schnapps does.
Have they let you on to a computer without nurse again?
Bloody NHS..
SP4BS that should be easy, he could recomend some very good tailors my dear
Get yourself to Asda’ ho hum. You can kit a child out for £12.
Andrew Marr’s position on “his” show is untenable.
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-2200493/Andrew-Marr-caught-kissing-groping-mystery-woman-outside-Soho-nightclub.html
Most women simply have no taste.
It’s the money old lad. that is what they go for.
Talking of money,I see Bliar has just had a ‘nice little earner’.There’s always a drink in it for him.
Only Bolly for B3liar.
Sorry – should have been B£liar.
Must get your signs right son!
Durr please get the name right, it is B’Liar as in Alan B’Asterd
Millionaire war criminal B£iar is more accurate.
I wouldn’t touch Marr with yours.
With women, it’s all about the POWER we journos have. The package is immaterial. And there’s the proof. I don’t even bother with deodorant.
It’s all very well for Andrew Marr to be doing all this shagging; but what’s he going to do when he loses his looks?
If he persists in such unbecoming behaviour, his looks may not be the only thing he loses!
Quite so. Boris is not going to like having competition around the dives of London.
Boris is popular. Get over it.
Looks to me like she’s trying to puke but ole jug ears keeps getting his large gob (GOB) in the way. Perhaps he’s got a vomit fettish.
Will she hold him by the ears when he goes “diving”?
Yvette has never looked lovelier
Was just about to post the same thing but saw yours just in time. (In a manner of speaking…)
After all the bare skin parading around in the sun here, and undoubtedly at your location too, you begin to forget how a Socialist woman actually looks.
Most socialist women look as if they could have been participants in a 1960s porn film. Stomachs bulging, no shape to their limbs and a state of body hairiness that would have made Jerry Garcia look like an alopecia sufferer.
You should see what they look like in England.
On second thoughts…
S.C. should take himself on long walks past Barcola to Grignano on sunny weekends.
The Viale Miramare is pleasant enough but does not compare with my half acre of heaven.
I doubt it has the same quantity of nudity though, does it?
Fame at last.
Any statement on body hairiness, Yvette?
C’est moi, dans le déguisement.
I replied in french ;” it was me in disguise” but its been m0dded.!!!
Eeeew. So that’s what he wears under his Nazi uniform ?
I’m glad I never saw that earlier, it would have put me off of my breakfast. Ed Balls is a tosser at the best of times but to think of him in stockings and suspenders is much worse.
But i designed the uniforms so well they don’t need these sort of accessories!
There was a lot of cynicism about the Olympics but I think we should be proud that we pulled it off without a single hitch. And we should grateful to the intelligence services, who for once didn’t fuck up, and the dozen or so arrests they made before the games which prevented any muslim atrocities being committed.
With their tight control of the media, we are in a democracy! , how would we know what has happened,maybe my grand kids or their grand kids will be about when the relevant security papers are released.
Agreed Proud.
And two fingers to the fat cat union bosses who failed in their desperate bid to disrupt the games for their own political ends.
Agreed, 1 zillion %
Even I have to compliment Lord Coe (of Ca Cola)- Bloody Good Job mate.
Also agree 100%. Poor old Unions & Labour – once again they failed to bring the Olympics down to their rotten level. Bad luck barstewards!
They failed? Getting huge unmerited bungs for their members is failing? The main failure was the craven surrender of Boris to blackmail.
I am disgusted of the blatant violation of Terry Taliban’s yuman rites! We live in a fascist state!
What Olympics?
Indeed!
The North Koreans would have done it better.
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2200683/They-dont-things-halves-North-Koreans-celebrate-countrys-National-Day-dramatic-stage-featuring-staggering-100-000-performers.html
I did read members of the Armed Services guarding The Olympics were abused and spat upon in the East End whilst making their way to and from the venues. The downside of multi-culturism the MSM don’t report.
The whole bleeding lot of these toss pots need repatriating. Why the hell they wish to live in our Country I can’t imagine!
Hey Ed, fancy a 3 in a bed with Steph Flounders?
No, her cocks bigger than mine.
Thats why she walks the way she does.
Strange looking girl, she has a forehead like a fucking Klingon.
Can I stick my hands down her pants?
Not unless you have a step ladder.
I could lend him one if need be.
Bit of the ol’ Gay Gordon’s Nokia back lob in there, I see.
Wossa Nokia?
I saw one in a film the other day. The film was “ice age III”
A nokia is when the TV licence herberts nokia door.
A nickia is what plod does when you misbehave.
A nackia is the result of a heavy evening with Gladys next door.
Hope that helps.
I’m partial to a nackia.
It’s what you find in half of a bra.
I’m not sure that the Brits are really ready to host the games. As I said to Mr Leader, Ed Miliband, I wear magical underwear and I wish to spread the beauty of Mormonism.
Och I never dooted it fer a second
DOOMED I tell ya we are doomed!!!!
Mitt? Rhymes with Shit.
MY EYES!
I wear a jock strap and like to cover myself in maple syrup and HP sauce for Tracy to lick off. Sorry, I should’ve warned you to have mind bleach ready. Too late now.
But sometimes I get so hungry that I just lick it off myself.
Bet you still remember that night when Eric Pickles came by and beat you to it.
Can you see why he’s so hard to resist?
To be fair to Balls (which I like to think I am) he’s probably thinking ‘Butch? What the fuck is he on about? Where did that come from? Did he really say that?’
In fairness, that’s the reaction of most people to anything that Dave says.
I refer you to my conspiracy theory: SPADs have bets with each other about how silly they can make their “masters” look.
Nonsense. All competition requires a degree of challenge.
You might note that Brown’s SPAD’s are in the lead from the time they got him to smile.
@SP4BS
That was comedy Gold.
That certainly explains ‘the Big Society’. And ‘predistribution’.
Oh look dear!
Dave’s hetro mask slipped then, silly boy should know that Balls is has been topping the twinkish geek sheek RedEd for for some time now.
#croft!
Hell!, what a bloody horrible thing to cast your eyes on first thing on a Monday morning, ughh!.
Tell me about it.
Never use a rapier when a sledgehammer will do.
The person in the cartoon is suffering as a result of the austerity programme in the UK.
He can’t afford decent clothes or a full body wax,poor chap.
Lend us a tenner Brendan.
Why is Cable the business secretary? Surely it should be someone who doesn’t hate business?
Ah! That old chestnut! Is the Foreign Office for foreigners?
is the pope german??
ohh….shome mishtake there … ed.
Cable is at heart a socialist. Of course he hates business.
I hate everyone except myself (and young pretty girls I can exhibit my political power to).
Envy – me?
Of course, as I am in an very extended male menopause.
Nurse?
Cable is not there as the Business Secretary. He is there as George’s carer.
That’s probably what they told Vince to make him feel needed.
This must be the first time in recorded history of Rich and Mark cartoons that there has been no doubt about who the subject is supposed to be.
I know who it’s supposed to be. It just doesn’t look anything like him.
As usual.
I didn’t say it was good…
Spot on cat, once over the shock of seeing the cartoon, it was easy to figure out who it was, just not fair, how are we to call these “cartoonists” names if we know what it’s about.
Mark should not be rich on these offerings.
You can tell from a mile away.
It’s Sally BearCow
I like ‘em as nature intended!
I thought the Olympics had finished, yet it’s still all over what they call News in this country, I wonder how many billions it’s cost us for this month of so called “sports”
It hasn’t cost us a penny. It’s all ‘investment’.
Bull Shit !
Less than 10% of the near 12 Billion costs came from sponsorship
each medal won in the able bodied Olympics cost the British taxpayer £285,000,000 each
Sorry they cost £185 million each as reported on this site
http://order-order.com/2012/08/13/olympics-in-numbers/#comments
everyone in the country would have a gold medal each simply to pay off The one eyed Mongs Gold sale and I don’t see you mentioning that.
Just keep handing out the prizes Citizen Comrade!
Sorry. It was supposed to be irony.
Makes perfect sense to me dear boy
The cartoon promotes R & M’s views re football and the future Olympic legacy.
Everybody needs a Brazilian.
..especially the US ladies soccer team (and one or two ‘lady’ tennis players).
Oh yes! – Doo let’s get back to GW – it’s a scam worth much to me!
The only clue to who the fuck it’s suppose to be is the mobile phone being thrown
but it looks nothing like the Mental One !
Labour party slapper finally reveals his inner self.
An eighteen stone trannie with soap, I recognised Balls straight away.
Andrew Marr is a good Marxist, he can do no wrong. But had it been a Tory, we’d be demanding his resignation!
sadly that’s actually true. If I was him I wouldn’t sleep too close to Jackie in the near future or if he did then he should make sure the secateurs are well hidden.
I see old marr said this morning as he exited his house with a suitcase in hand that ‘darling jackie was very cross with him’
If he had been mine he have gone out the front door on his rear end ,minus a suitcase and his nicker drawer upended over the front doorstep for all the world to see.
I have no sympathy for his missus. They’re both bedwetter apologists for the Maximum Imbecile.
Karma.
Fuck ‘em.
Very true JGM.
+1
. . never does run smoothie
Ahh!
If you have ever wondered what the fragrant Yvette would look like in the bed chamber then wonder no more.
Ed Balls. His theories of endogenous post growth thingies live on.
Get the middle classes raiding their savings to make conservatories. As hestletine said “thats balls”.
What cute little bows sweetie, – do any untie?
I’m the only hope for the future, – and I’m still only a glitter in someone’s eye.
He looks very dishy, does he do smearing and does he have a coffee table?
More than 100,000 Russian citizens could qualify for EU passports under a little-noticed law change in a former Soviet country.
Latvia – which in recent years has seen a large exodus of its people to Britain and Germany, many taking low paid jobs – is to open its doors to ‘an unknown number’ of Siberians.
Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2200821/More-100-000-Siberians-EU-passports-Latvia-changes-little-noticed-law.html#ixzz263Nes2wv
I’m ready and waiting.
Wait till I let the 73million Turks in. I am related you know.
So much cheaper than training our own people.
With your habits Boris, you are related to most of the world population by now.
Unfortunately, we all are.
Is that David Owen?
Why are all useless c_suckers called David? Latest would be . . . remind me . . begins with ‘C’ . . .
………Ciliband?
My wife preferred it when it was just called Jif.
Ed Balls would be better depicted as a purple Bell End
Sorry – already trademarked by Jeremy Hunt.
It’s David Laws Boyfriend/Landlord , realising he’s now back in the money
+++Laugh+++ bullyballs says he and bumblingvince are going to fix the economy!
Fix of course is the operative word as ‘fix’ is what folks do when they’re fiddling the books. They’d be marginally more comic at it than gordon was and twice as incompetent.
predistribution (whatever that means), quantitative easing and spend spend spend until the crash comes – ‘great’ policy!!
It worked last time.
Yes but since then gordon’s pal baldemort has admitted there’s no money left as gordon spent it all and then ran up the UK credit card to the max.
No that’s not what happened. It was the banks. It was the yanks. It was everybody else. It wasnae me.
ah and whose idea was it to introduce ‘light touch regulation’ of the banks?
It wasn’t us, it was those feckless c’unts who borrowed more money than they could afford to pay back.
No. No. It wasn’t us. The banks made us borrow all that money. It’s all their fault.
Our ‘Homes under the Hammer’ programme had nothing to do with it.
not one article about our great ex leader claiming 127.000 pounds expenses for one debate the media are shit
A bargain.
Look what he managed to ‘achieve’ when he was hanging about the place 24/7.
Longest and deepest recession in almost a century. Biggest deficits in history. Trebled the national debt in only nine years.
If only he’d stayed away from 1997 onwards.
It’s worth millions to keep him away. He’s the Typhoid Mary of the British economy.
‘Typhoid Mary of the British Economy’ Very apt!
What absolutely amazes me are the huge sums of money (although nowhere near what bliar commands) that people are paying gordon to go and give speeches. What idiots would pay good money to go and listen to a disastrously failed so called ‘economist’ conman?
Money laundering. For services rendered. Show up at some hotel overseas. Give a one hour ‘speech’ to some quasi-governmental foreign organisation. Get paid a shit-load of cash. What other conceivable explanation is there?
The other classic is John Prescott being feted as an environmental guru by the Chinese. The jackass who, with a team of 2,000 to make him feel important, decided to build 100,000 homes on a flood-plain. Yeah. The Chinese could really learn from that guy.
What do you think they were buying? His unique environmental knowledge? Of course not. They were hoping to get him pissed up or in a compromising situation with the maid so that he might reveal some national secrets.
I don’t know whether or not they succeeded. I can’t believe Blair would have trusted Prescott with any important information.
The chinese do of course have buildings that fall down and crush people in earthquake zones.
Ya’all called?
I think I have just vomited my anus out of my mouth
An easy mistake. Theresa May has just walked in the room.
More taxes?
VAT at 20%
National insurance up
Petrol duty up
I’ve still got 5p left at the end of every month, Labour wants that as well do they?
No. They want you to keep that 5p. They’re calling it ‘predistribution’.
Previously they would have taken that 5p, sent it all around the houses taking an administrative cut at each point and then given you 2p back and called it ‘redistribution’.
Is there a connection?
The British child brides: Muslim mosque leaders agree to marry girl of 12… so long as parents don’t tell anyone
In an undercover investigation, two imams said they would be prepared to officiate at the wedding of an underage girl to a man in his twenties, despite fears the pair would later have sex.
Typical muzzie behaviour.
Will the authorities be prosecuting the Imams who have been exposed and if not why not?
the basic rate of tax on earnings is c40% (add income tax, 2x NICs, community charge)
this should be raised?
I do wish they’d give bullyballs more airtime – he is a great comic on economic issues. Talks such a load of twaddle all the time. More he’s exposed to the public the more they’ll understand what a disaster he’d be as chancellor.
The BBC (and Andrew Marr) give Toxic Ned all the airtime he wants. Then they bowl him nice underarm questions of the sort ‘Mr Balls, what do you think should be done to improve the UK economy after the Golden Legacy left by Labour was ruined by the Tories…’
Andrew likes to push at the boundaries of credibility as in his statement that his wife did not pack his suitcase and tell him to go, (this of course could be technically correct as he probably packed his own suitcase and left of his own accord before his penis got cut off with a bread knife) despite being photographed leaving the matrimonial home with a suitcase in his hand and then getting into a taxi very shortly after arriving back from his innocent night out.
http://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/politics/exclusive-ed-balls–im-planning-a-proper-wealth-tax-8107090.html
I see the neoendogenous balls says he’s planning a proper wealth tax whilst militwit says he’ll do no such thing as he is planning a predistribution policy, whatever that is.
Either way they don’t look capable of managing their kids pocket money so I doubt the electorate will hand them back the keys to the UK’s massive overdraft that they bequeathed us in 2010.
Amazon are building huge new predistribution warehouses at strategic points in the U.K which will be up and running in time for Xmas, they have already started recruiting extra Elves, and Reindeer are being shipped in from Lapland, CEO Santa Klaus said: “Tiny Tim and all hard working families will be showered with free gifts, it’s the right thing to do, Ho!Ho!Ho!, climb upon my knee sonny boy”.
Yvette will not be happy with her hubby showing off his prize balls in public.
That IS Yvette
If that’s not Sally Bercow then I’m a Dutchman.